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Seiryuu
2003-11-18, 23:54
Thought I'd start this up for fun, similar to an Acrobat list I got from a friend. If someone else is already threading this, tell me.
This thread is to gain a listing of all the various "laws" behind the anime universe, you know, those certain things that you notice that maybe one current anime is not doing. Also, any FUNNY observations. Nothing obvious unless you can back it up with a new conclusion. For instance, please don't write saying how all the girls have big eyes. we know. However, it is acceptable to note that, given cranial space remaining after accounting for the size of the eyes and of the mouth when fully open, the brain of the average anime character is about half as big as a cute girls mouth when she's feeling thoughtful or petulant. The relation is obvious, since the most logical beings have slit viewers instead of eyeballs.

Also, analysis of characters is acceptable. For instance, I've noticed an almost immortal correlation between hair color/style and the personality type of an anime girl. Here's a sample list of types and styles:
Hearthrob: not miss popular, the real thing. The standard DID(Damsel in distress), she's there for the Hero to fall in love with and to give said hero a reason to throw his life away every other episode. Timid as a rabbit in hunting season, loyal and affectionate as a puppy, her hair is almost always a natural color, usually either pitch black or platinum blonde.
Mystery girl: often combined with the hearthrob, this girl is mainly the enigma that spawns the plot. Whether her origin, or something about her nature, she is basically one big unknown. Along with black and blonde, you sometimes find sky-blue hair, almost always straight.
Bimbo: one word: Mihoshi. No brains, too much optimistic cheer. sometimes appears instead of the Spitfire to be the antihero's mate. Hair: big, often blonde or some light shaded, unnatural color like cotton-candy pink. often very curly.
Spitfire: Lina Inverse. Need I say more? overall good girl with some major weak points. Even lightly touch on one of these weaknesses, and you'd rather have a nuclear warhead shoved up your... Hair is often either pitch black or has some reddish hue to it. Rarely has more than a slight wave to it. Almost always accompanied by the...
Classic antihero: only male I can come up with. His hair is usually brown, and about as unkempt as Einstein's. He may be smart, but it never occurs of him to think about what comes to his mind before it comes out his mouth. terrible, if ever, liar, but can be very insulting without meaning to. Him and the spitfire are what I like to call Anime's "Golden Couple". A girl who reacts massively to any slight combined with a guy who has no control over what he says, the possibilities are endless. That's why Ranma 1/2 lasted for more than 100 eps.
One more thing, please note any anime that breaks significantly from the norm. That is, something that's practically forbidden in anime, like one of the primary, favorite characters turning out to be a bad guy. This was a long opening, but I had several requests and examples. If traffic grows, I might split this thread into components, but for now, enjoy.

Laguna
2003-11-19, 06:39
Yes, there was thread like this sometime ago in old forum. I might as well list couple observations here:

Characters:

-"Clumsy goody-goody girl": This character is found nearly all animes. She usually doesn't say anything bad to anyone and tries to please everyone. Usually has permanent stupid smile on her face and laughs a lot. Has "always" long hair that usually is either green or brown. Eyeglasses and big breasts are also very common on this character.
-The bimbo character you mentioned: She seem to be always hungry.. and when she get's food, she eats fast and LOT.

Other things:

-"Tokyo-centrism": Everything seems to happen always in tokyo. This conserns of course animes that are happening on this world and not in some fantasy world.
-Ramen noodles: Seem to be rather common food for anime characters.
-That chirping sound outside: There is that insect making that sound, but I can't recall what was it.
-School-uniforms: Well has to be mentioned.. Strange enough, many (especially female) characters seems to be confortable on they're school-uniforms at free time also.
-Festivals: There is these recurring festivals in anime. You know those that include shooting game, fish (or was it turtle?) catching game, various sea-foods stalls.. and of course people wearing kimonos.

Kuroi_Washi
2003-11-19, 07:10
Part 2 of the Laws of Anime, laws 35-46 deleted by NoSanninWa.

Copyright Notice - Many of the laws are based on the intellectual input from a variety of sources, but all text on this site is copyright Ryan Shellito and Darrin Bright. You are free to copy, distribute, edit, and add your own laws, so long as you leave all the credits intact. I prefer people link to this site rather than putting up their own copy, so they keep up with any changes.
Unfortunately, this law seems to apply to Otaku in the real world...

Sorry is a bit long the text, but its quite funny, at least some are, If one of the mods thinks its to long i can erase some of the laws and pass them by PM if someone wants them.

NoSanninWa
2003-11-19, 07:23
Way too long the text as you suggest. Fortunately it is possible to fix that problem. At the same time I would like to fulfill that last request you cite by the creators of that document. Here are the
Laws of Anime Version 6.0 (http://www.bright.net/~nyla/animelaw.html)

In case anyone is curious, here is the History of the Laws of Anime (http://www.abcb.com/ency/l/lawsofan.htm)

Kuroi_Washi
2003-11-19, 13:30
Ah ok, Thanks NoSanniWa, sorry for the extremely long text, next time ill try to post something a bit smaller, like 3 lines :p

Seiryuu
2003-11-19, 13:31
I knew some group had done something similar, I wasn't trying to rip them off. If I'd known the names, I would have accredited them with the notion of this thread. However, only the basic idea of having such a thread came from such a source. The rest that I said was personal observation, even if similar observations are noted in other places. Anyway, I hope that a casual thread can be maintained here for observations and the like. If not, then the "laws" portion can be cut off and leave just some of the other things, like analysis of character archetypes and a listing of anime that breaks the rules. Heres a few new things:
Characters:
The Savant: most of the time, stupid as the Bimbo, shy as the "Goody-goody" or hearthrob, useless as a rock. However, back her into a corner, and she unleashes power that could take out Goku. Usually appears in school or sport anime. Hair is ALWAYS brown, straight, and relatively drab.
The SUPERBimbo: Anyone who has seen Naga or Kodachi knows what I'm talking about. hair is irrelevant to this character, as are looks so long as the girl looks reeeeeally ugly. Usually has massive mammaries, and can't see past the end of her nose. Immediately judges everything as either worship of her person or an attack, and reason will have no effect on her views. Terrifying laugh is a must. Also, eyes look slightly dulled by some substance or other, most likely the drug of her own perceived greatness. Avoid at all costs.

One other thing, both characters can be seen in Magic Users Club, and the club also breaks a standard rule for anime and Star Wars: In Magic Users Club, there is NO SOUND IN SPACE. Never before in history has anyone seen such a novelty.
Once again, I got the notion of starting a thread from the group aforementioned, but the ideas themselves were mine and, if it's okay with them, I'd like to keep this thread up.

PocariSweat
2003-11-19, 20:44
-That chirping sound outside: There is that insect making that sound, but I can't recall what was it.


Ah, those are Cicadas! We have them where I live and really do sound just like that. They stay mostly up in trees and you almost never see a live one, but they're very large and ugly with oddly oversized heads. The sound comes from their wings I believe....

http://images.google.com/images?q=cicada

Some other things:

Schools all look the same - a central clock tower with wings off to the sides (classic example: Urusei Yatsura's Tokemiki High) and all feature Big Ben chimes. I'm guessing many Japanese schools must really follow that pattern.

Blond hair can often indicate a foreign character, but blue hair counts as black and any character with it is probably native Japanese.

Students will be too afraid to even talk to someone they have a crush on until they manage to work up the courage to "confess". ...which usually strikes the clueless koibito like a bolt from the blue.

Americans are all crazy, and kiss everyone they meet - which you must accept because it's their custom. (Something I plan to test out if I ever go to Japan :) )

Anime parents must be frail, ephemeral beings because, if you're a kid, chances are pretty darn good that one or both of 'em is dead.

...but that's ok because even a 12 year old can live completely on their own with no bother from social services!

and while you're mentioning the festivals, don't forget the obligitory onsen episode!

MAT86
2003-11-20, 10:40
dont forget the bad guys!

theres always the 'hard' one usualy with white hair
theres always the big fat one usual the leautenent of the 'big boss'
theres always the sadistic weakling weasle type person

last boss is probably the only truly variable. you can have anything you want!
from weak looking magic girl to huge giant robot or even the white haired guy
(siphiroph)

Kempis Curious
2003-11-20, 22:53
-"Clumsy goody-goody girl": This character is found nearly all animes. She usually doesn't say anything bad to anyone and tries to please everyone. Usually has permanent stupid smile on her face and laughs a lot. Has "always" long hair that usually is either green or brown. Eyeglasses and big breasts are also very common on this character.

I don't agree with the hair-color ideas. However, I'm having a hard time remembering when a klutzy character didn't make up for her butterfingers with good looks/big knockers, and she was a sweet, kind girl. Not a boy. Girl.


I didn't like how that link said that "time speeds up in a fight". I think the law should say that in a melee/battle time slows to convenient slowness in order to recall childhood events, analyze the opponent's strategy, or to make a speech about the opponent's personality faults.

There also seems to be a lot of high-school thugs in Japan, always on the lookout to start a fight, rape girls, or hold defenseless people hostage with knives. Also, if a kid has an interest in detectives or similar law-enforcement, he'll attract a large number of murderers and their victims to his vicinity... unless, of course, people die violently all the time over there, and few people notice the unlikelyhood of such things always being an accident.


And it's gotten less often recently (thank goodness) that people of African descent have pink lips, and Caucasians have noses which project around 3 inches from their faces.

-k

curious

Quantsini
2003-11-21, 00:51
Way too long the text as you suggest. Fortunately it is possible to fix that problem. At the same time I would like to fulfill that last request you cite by the creators of that document. Here are the
Laws of Anime Version 6.0 (http://www.bright.net/~nyla/animelaw.html)

In case anyone is curious, here is the History of the Laws of Anime (http://www.abcb.com/ency/l/lawsofan.htm)


ROFL, that's awesome ^^

hobobaggins
2003-11-21, 02:07
dont forget: if a bad guy can beat up the good guy, the bad guy will wait around till they can beat HIM up

the good guy ALWAYS saves his final weapon for last. even if he could have ended the fight with a shot to the head, he has to wheedle around with a sword... before nailing the sucker with a gun.

luckme10
2003-11-22, 02:57
100 different hairstyles and colors blue being a particular favorite for many. Dark purple coming off as black under the sun is one too...oh also theres NO LIPS FOR GAWDS Sake! as if we didn't learn from initial D. If there are lips then they are usually just highlighted no outlines. And the eyes there has to be enough space between the eyes to fit a third eye in in a general rule as well

Seiryuu
2003-11-23, 02:01
First, some folks have mentioned Ryan Shellito and co.'s law #27, the Law of Conservation of Firepower. Any weapon capable of destroying the enemy in a single shot will only be used as a last resort. I think this is unfair, since there are VERY good reasons for this. For one thing, these weapons usually take alot out ot the one that firres it, sort of like in Outlaw Star, where the most powerful weapon drains the user's own life-force. I wouldn't want to use up 20 years of my life on an enemy that I could beat in any other way, esp. if there might be another enemy later who's really strong. Also, these ultimate weapons tend to be a little overly destructive, and have lingering side effects. It's true that we could end many wars by sending a nuclear barrage on an enemy territory, but I personally wouldn't want to touch something like that if I didn't have to. So don't complain that this sort of ultimate weapon is avoided. Japan learned alot about avoiding strong weapons at Hiroshima.
Now, I'd like to list a few laws that I would probably call laws of Anime Desirability. You know, the laws that make all us otakus wish this world was more like an anime.
1: Guns are extremely hard to find, and those that are available are all in the hands of large criminal syndicates. Unless they're hired assassins, kids can't get their hands on a gun for anything. This is obvious because of law two.
2: Street gangs are always semi-feudal in form and nature. The gang members either bear chunks of wood or metal, chains, or some form of old martial-arts-type weapon, like nanchakus(I don't know if I spelled that right, what Michelangelo uses.) The leader sees himself as a sort of ronin, holding to some honor code and beating the crap out of his enemies with the ultimate street weapon: a big, wooden sword.
I'd say that these two laws make things peaceful over there.
3: The primary reason I would love to be in an anime. A man's sex appeal is directly related to his social ineptitude. The ultimate sex symbol is the guy even the geeks won't hang out with. If you aren't butt ugly, but have no redeeming qualities, the women will swoon with one look at you. In an anime world, I would have my pick of any girl in the universe, and several outside this universe too. One problem, the girls I don't pick will be so crazy that I'd be fighting all my life to stay alive and to maintain my chastity. This is the true key to anime desirability.

a_nevels666
2003-11-23, 16:23
First, some folks have mentioned Ryan Shellito and co.'s law #27, the Law of Conservation of Firepower. Any weapon capable of destroying the enemy in a single shot will only be used as a last resort. I think this is unfair, since there are VERY good reasons for this. For one thing, these weapons usually take alot out ot the one that firres it, sort of like in Outlaw Star, where the most powerful weapon drains the user's own life-force. I wouldn't want to use up 20 years of my life on an enemy that I could beat in any other way, esp. if there might be another enemy later who's really strong. Also, these ultimate weapons tend to be a little overly destructive, and have lingering side effects. It's true that we could end many wars by sending a nuclear barrage on an enemy territory, but I personally wouldn't want to touch something like that if I didn't have to. So don't complain that this sort of ultimate weapon is avoided. Japan learned alot about avoiding strong weapons at Hiroshima.
Now, I'd like to list a few laws that I would probably call laws of Anime Desirability. You know, the laws that make all us otakus wish this world was more like an anime.
1: Guns are extremely hard to find, and those that are available are all in the hands of large criminal syndicates. Unless they're hired assassins, kids can't get their hands on a gun for anything. This is obvious because of law two.
2: Street gangs are always semi-feudal in form and nature. The gang members either bear chunks of wood or metal, chains, or some form of old martial-arts-type weapon, like nanchakus(I don't know if I spelled that right, what Michelangelo uses.) The leader sees himself as a sort of ronin, holding to some honor code and beating the crap out of his enemies with the ultimate street weapon: a big, wooden sword.
I'd say that these two laws make things peaceful over there.
3: The primary reason I would love to be in an anime. A man's sex appeal is directly related to his social ineptitude. The ultimate sex symbol is the guy even the geeks won't hang out with. If you aren't butt ugly, but have no redeeming qualities, the women will swoon with one look at you. In an anime world, I would have my pick of any girl in the universe, and several outside this universe too. One problem, the girls I don't pick will be so crazy that I'd be fighting all my life to stay alive and to maintain my chastity. This is the true key to anime desirability.

Point 1 and 2 pretty much true in real life Japan.

BME
2003-11-23, 17:37
All male clothing is made out of kevlar and therefore does not rip when fighting, all female clothing on the otherhand is made out of tin foil and rips at slightest touch, except around nipples and other sensitive areas where it´s magicly glued on.

Seiryuu
2003-12-01, 22:02
A few more things:
1. I am sad to say it seems the Golden Couple is becoming a thing of the Past, to be replaced by the Lemorrah. I think I got the name of those fish that are stuck on sharks right. Until recently, I could always depend on anime to give me this coupling. You know the drill. Guy with no impulse-control coupled with a girl who has an infinite well of suppressed power coupled with absolutely no anger-management abilities. No matter how down I was, I used to be able to find a new series filled with romance and a sort of comedy that takes Slapstick to the ultimate absurdity(What's the best term for this, Nukestick, or Ranma1/2?). Now, instead you have a good, moral guy stuck with a Mihoshi-like bimbo who won't let him go for one second, almost like some kind of parasite, hence the name. I blame Vandread. Good series, but started a bad trend.
2. Minime. Not the ugly, rabid midget with his pinky stuck to his lip. I'm talking what some call Super Deformed Kawaii. Miniature caricatures of a character, with huge heads, thick bodies, and short limbs. Sort of like the original Dragon Ball. I've never met a 12-year-old that short, or who could pack so much punch into such a pathetic arm.
3. My favorite type of ERC(Ecchi-Romance-Comedy): the Harem. One guy living with a large number of girls, and with some reason to be unhappy about this. First was Tenchi and Ranma, where one guy has roughly 5 girls obsessed over him and more or less living with him, but who are so violent he is lucky to survive, even if he's the strongest being in the universe. Now we've spread out a bit more, with combinations of girls who are more disturbingly quirky than violent, such as a girl who likes to show affection by bruising her love, or an idiot who has no idea what's going on from one minute to the next. The ultimate harem, I'd have to say, is Hanaukyo Maids. One guy, 100 gorgeous girls, all of whom are incredibly capable in their fields, and all of whom are religiously devoted to serving their Master's every whim, no matter what. Some, in fact, try to push him to enjoy the full extent of their abilities. One problem, the guy's allergic to females. No matter what the Harem, I love them all. Anyone know of some good harems?(aside from Love Hina, Tenchi, Ranma, and Aoshi)

NoSanninWa
2003-12-02, 02:51
Lemorrah should be remora.

Seiryuu
2003-12-07, 00:37
Thanks, NoSanninWa, remora it is then. Either way, I think the term quite accurately describes how Midori clings to Yuusuke in Green Green TV.
I've noticed, long action anime, that is, anything above 52 eps(2 full seasons), tends to all fall into one of three categories:

1: InuYasha-style. This is rare, but the definite best. The hero has a clearly defined goal, such as reclaim all shards of a mystical jewel. The goal takes awhile, hence the long story, but it runs relatively smoothly and maintains viewers' interest, since the plot is simply continuing until it reaches the true conclusion.
2: Pokemon. The absolute worst. The hero has a goal, but it is poorly defined, such as be a Pokemon(or other trade) master. Since there is no definitive way to declare that such a goal has been achieved, the story can keep going until the viewers get bored. Also, the story is based on something repetitive, like a game series, forcing the hero to drop inexplicably back to level 1 every 26 eps. I dropped pokemon when he went to Johto with a pack of incredibly strong creatures, strong enough to almost beat the League, and suddenly they seemed to be barely able to beat the level-5 creatures at the start. No growth at all.
3: most well known, Dragon-Ball/Z/GT. The goal is again undefined, usually just "I want to be stronger." with no ultimate goal, the hero just gets stronger, and the producers simply have to decide how long they can keep making the characters more powerful. It attracts alot of attention, since we all like big explosions, but it gets stale after awhile. esp. if theres no real reason for the work, like in dbz, aside from fighting. The big problem with this is that, if the characters always grow stronger, then things start to get absurd. Every season, there is a villain that is the "strongest being in the universe," and when a stronger creature appears next season, everyone just accepts it. I dropped this series when they started making all the villains mere variations of the final good villain, Cell. Also, I thought it was a little much when powering up could rip the fabric of space-time.

PocariSweat
2003-12-07, 01:10
1: InuYasha-style. This is rare, but the definite best. The hero has a clearly defined goal, such as reclaim all shards of a mystical jewel. The goal takes awhile, hence the long story, but it runs relatively smoothly and maintains viewers' interest, since the plot is simply continuing until it reaches the true conclusion.
2: Pokemon. The absolute worst. The hero has a goal, but it is poorly defined, such as be a Pokemon(or other trade) master. Since there is no definitive way to declare that such a goal has been achieved, the story can keep going until the viewers get bored. Also, the story is based on something repetitive, like a game series, forcing the hero to drop inexplicably back to level 1 every 26 eps. I dropped pokemon when he went to Johto with a pack of incredibly strong creatures, strong enough to almost beat the League, and suddenly they seemed to be barely able to beat the level-5 creatures at the start. No growth at all.


He He, I kind of think these two series are *exactly* the same in this regard - I mean how many shards are there anyway? InuYasha is now at 100+ episodes and could go on in the same fashion forever. Both of these kind of hark at least as far back as Sailor Moon where you had the same basic plot each show (Sailor Scouts *by chance* go to some new shop/attraction, badies have inflitrated to steal "energy", girls discover badies, badies make a monster, girls defeat monster, wash, rinse, repeat).

In any case these plot devices are never the REAL plot - they just provide a framework to hang weekly plots on (like Kane's search for his Brother in Kung-Fu or the Fugitive's hunt for the one-armed man). Often each show is really more or less stand-alone.

So what's the difference? In one word - writing! While Pokemon is a thinly disguised commercial for related toys. IY has enough side plots and characters to keep things interesting.

Generally though I don't like this style because there's never any resolution. How long must we wait for InuYasha to find all the shards? Will Detective Conan ever be able to return to his teen-age form? Will Ranma ever cure his curse? Will Gilligan ever get off the Island? and so on. Eventually they get stuck in a sort of time warp where this framing plot can never progress. Often I think it would be better to resolve this plot and have the characters move on to other things. For example, in IY they could find all the shards - but what happens then? It's not like everyone suddenly stops - writers could go on to take the show in a new direction. In other cases, like Ranma or Detective Conan, it would be more of a problem though.

Kempis Curious
2003-12-07, 01:29
Generally though I don't like this style because there's never any resolution. How long must we wait for InuYasha to find all the shards? Will Detective Conan ever be able to return to his teen-age form? Will Ranma ever cure his curse? Will Gilligan ever get off the Island? and so on. Eventually they get stuck in a sort of time warp where this framing plot can never progress. Often I think it would be better to resolve this plot and have the characters move on to other things. For example, in IY they could find all the shards - but what happens then? It's not like everyone suddenly stops - writers could go on to take the show in a new direction. In other cases, like Ranma or Detective Conan, it would be more of a problem though.

Whoever is responsible for Princess Tutu really understood the appeal and the pitfalls of the above ideas. One of the many wonderful things about the first season of that anime was how the storyline started in this fashion... heart-piece collection through monster-of-the-week, but then broke with that idea before it became repetitive. And then the whole idea of collecting the heart-pieces was called into question when the emotion of fear was given back to Mute, and also Claire's arguments in the final episodes. (Final in the first season. That second season was a disappointing tack-on for me.)

Wow, and the things that had the heart pieces were very surprising while it lasted... ballet-dancing anteater, a woman, a river, a ghost, a lamp.

Ooo I love that anime. :love: It really shows creativity when a piece of art can manipulate genres like that.

-k

Kempis Curious
2003-12-07, 01:42
NO LIPS FOR GAWDS Sake! as if we didn't learn from initial D. If there are lips then they are usually just highlighted no outlines.

For some reason if someone is wearing lipcolor in anime it always appears garish, no matter how thinly or light the color is. :( A case in point is the older sister in Piano who always wore lip color (as a lot of women do). It so obvious I found it terribly distracting.

re: anime laws... has there been one stating that all high school animes have to have a scene where the character is late for school? This seems to happen a often in the first episode, and a piece of toast is in the mouth of the running student.

-k

curious

PocariSweat
2003-12-07, 02:22
Ooo I love that anime. :love: It really shows creativity when a piece of art can manipulate genres like that.


Yeah, I also really loved Princess TuTu - and I wasn't expecting to at first. They really did take a idea that sounds trite at frist and turn it into something really amazing.

It was also really interesting how it was laid out. If you watch just the first 13 episodes, you might think that's the whole story, but it'r really only just begining. It's almost if the writers weren't sure if they'd have a second season, so planned the show out to work in either case. It's also a show that really ties its plot together well. Way too many anime's these days have jumped on the trend of introducing plot elements as a come-on only to ignore them later. Call it "Evangel-itis" :) Sometime I think they figure if they just make the plot disjointed enough, people will think it's "deep".

Back to show plots - don't forget there's two major types of Anime - limited and unlimited. Unlimited is like most normal American TV shows - the series just runs as long as the ratings are good with no pre-defined end. Naturally these shows tend to be episodic.

What I find interesting is most animes aren't like this - instead they're like a mini-series with a preset number of shows. On the plus side this lets them build a full novel-like story arc with a structured plot. However, it does have a few drawbacks.

For one, it forces them to kind of "reinvent the wheel" every year. Instead of building on the growing popularity and history of sucessful characters, writers have to start from scratch to win the viewer over. It's one reason I think you see so many "archetypal" anime characters (like cat-girls, angels, maids, and so on). As each of these characters is something the viewer is familiar with, it acts as a sort of shorthand allowing the writers to waste less time setting up the premise.

It also probably makes anime a harder sell over-seas too. For example, originally I had a really tough time buying anime - there were too many titles I knew nothing about, and Anime - maybe more than anything else - can't be judged on it's premise alone. I'm sure if not for fansubs, I'd of never watched anything like Princes Tutu (Princes TUTU?! sounds like some kind of "My Little Pony" kiddie crap). In Japan it's shown on television or easily rented, so people can try before they buy, but before I discovered fansubs anime was all a big unknown for me.

LoneDust
2003-12-07, 02:54
I noticed from gundam seed:

No matter how a mecha explodes, the pilot's mask or or helmet will be found floating around space without a scratch.

Seiryuu
2003-12-17, 21:27
Just got two more girls for the list of archetypal female characters:
1: Mind-warp(aka The Guu): hair varies, but one feature always the same. Eyes could be beautiful if she looked out at the world in a normal manner. However, she is instead a cynical, manipulative brat. Other major feature: looks much younger than she is. Seems like a child, but her face and laugh send chills of terror down your spine. A few examples: Guu(Jungle wa Itsumo Hale Nochi Guu), Tsubasa Shibahime(Kare Kano), the class president in Onegai Twins(forgot her name).
2: the Psycho. This character is a ticking bomb. She is usually a normal girl. In fact, she's so sweet it's sickening. She makes Belldandy look like Lina Inverse. Yet much of this is because she is afraid of being rude or letting any anger out. However, once you push her too far, she becomes a psychotic demon. Beware. Best example to date is Anna Respighi of Battle Athletes Victory. She is proof of why it's good to let your anger out sometimes.

Heres a few common male archetypes.
Most of these are counterparts to the ANTIHERO.
1&2: Superior&Inferior rival: These two often come paired. The inferior rival is typically a big, ugly idiot who packs quite a punch. He's always trying to beat the antihero, but he can never cause 1HP damage. In the end, he becomes more of a lackey than a rival, though he'll kill any who calls him that. The superior rival is not necessarily SUPERIOR, but he's strong enough to give the hero a run for his money, and sometimes actually win. He's a motivation for the hero to keep getting stronger, if he needs any. For instance, Kuwabara is a classic inferior rival, and Hiei a superior.
3: Encyclopedia Brown: This guy is an old friend, or perhaps a circumstantial acquaintance. Either way, he looks like a geek, and knows a great deal about anything of significance to the story. While he is a good source of advice, and a good warrior in dire situations, he's usually the object of most random flying objects.

BTW, PocariSweat, yes, Gilligan DOES get off the island. My sister's a fanatic, so I've ended up seeing it to the end(heaven help me)

shiznitty
2003-12-18, 02:57
Gilligan got off the island? awwww... i was hoping it would turn out to be like the lord of the flies. Too bad. :P

Blizzer
2008-07-06, 18:42
I thought it would be interesting and funny, if we compiled a list of all the cliché stuff they put into anime by writing the unwritten rules they use in anime in general, for different genres or for different characters and things like that.

Unwritten rules of harem anime

1. The childhood friend or the first girl the protagonist meets is most likely the one he will develop a relationship with.

2. You must have a loli, tsundere, greedy girl, idiot girl, priestess, big-breasted girl, seductress, bookworm girl, samurai girl, posh rich girl, childhood friend, alien girl, robot girl, maid and sporty girl as standard.
(feel free to add more)

3. The male protagonist will be the biggest loser in history and generally an insult to mankind.

4. The protagonist will never get used to seeing girls naked and will promptly fountain blood from his nostrils if he even sees cleavage.

5. Everytime the protagonist goes to use the bathroom a naked girl will await him to shout "kyah!" and punch/ kick/ shoot him.

6. The protagonist will make little or no progress with any of the girls, essentially the same as the beginning.

7. Everytime the Protagonist falls over his face will meet a woman's panties.

8. The protagonist will fall over frequently for no apparent reason.

9. The protagonist will be subjected to beatings and attacks that will most likely kill another and be alright next episode.

10. The bad quality of japanese underwear means girls' bras and panties elastic will often snap, resulting in bras and panties flying off in a comedic fashion.

Just an example, it doesn't have to be harem, maybe the unwritten rule of the shonen hero or the shojo female protagonist.

qtipbrit
2008-07-06, 19:22
Unwritten rules of harem anime

1. The childhood friend or the first girl the protagonist meets is most likely the one he will develop a relationship with.
No, that's the general rule of anime.
Of course, "most likely" doesn't really make it a "rule" anymore.
2. You must have a loli, tsunderekko, greedy girl, idiot girl, priestess, big-breasted girl, seductress, bookworm girl, samurai girl, posh rich girl, childhood friend, alien girl, robot girl, maid and sporty girl as standard.
(feel free to add more)
Eh, when you have so many on the list, they're going to fit into one of them.
And watch your nouns/adjectives.
3. The male protagonist will be the biggest loser in history and generally an insult to mankind.
No, no, the male protagonist's closest male friend will be the biggest loser in history with the protagonist himself taking second.
4. The protagonist will never get used to seeing girls naked and will promptly fountain blood from his nostrils if he even sees cleavage.
True, can't argue anything here.
5. Everytime the protagonist goes to use the bathroom a naked girl will await him to shout "kyah!" and punch/ kick/ shoot him.
She doesn't have to be naked. She'll be as close as you can get without heavy censuring.
6. The protagonist will make little or no progress with any of the girls, essentially the same as the beginning.
The protagonist will actually make some progress with the main girl but still somehow end up as he did in the beginning.
This rule is the one most broken, though.
7. Everytime the Protagonist falls over his face will meet a woman's panties.
Or a woman's cleavage.
Or land on someone, who falls and reveals her panties/cleavage.
8. The protagonist will fall over frequently for no apparent reason.
Not quite so much here, this applies to several dojikko characters, but not really male harem leads much.
9. The protagonist will be subjected to beatings and attacks that will most likely kill another and be alright next episode.
Doesn't take them that long to recover, usually.
10. The bad quality of japanese underwear means girls' bras and panties elastic will often snap, resulting in bras and panties flying off in a comedic fashion.
Sometimes the bras just unclip instead of snap.

Overall, pretty good. I would add more, but I'm lazy.

SinsI
2008-07-06, 19:41
These are actually very much written.
http://www.cs.utah.edu/~duongsaa/more_htm/jk_100animeRules.htm

Although the ones after #46 repeat things mentioned in the laws 1-46 a lot (also known as Anime Laws of Physics).

A lot of them are also mentioned in the Tropes Wiki (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Tropes)

DragoonKain3
2008-07-06, 21:36
I actually hate the Tropes Wiki, as I believe that along with Shuffle, it propagated the myth that the childhood friend loses more often than not in anime with its unlucky osananajimi section. When of course, nothing could be further from the truth, as statistics show.

Well, at least they have a relatively new addition of the Victorious Childhood Friend (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/VictoriousChildhoodFriend), so I can forgive them somewhat. But the hatred still burns somewhat, so it would take some time. Maybe after I see some of the non-anime examples they have highlighted, which to be fair I don't really look for in western TV so I miss the few that comes out.

qtipbrit
2008-07-06, 22:59
I actually hate the Tropes Wiki, as I believe that along with Shuffle, it propagated the myth that the childhood friend loses more often than not in anime with its unlucky osananajimi section. When of course, nothing could be further from the truth, as statistics show.
Really?
The only examples of osana najimi losing I can remember are of
Where a lesser osana najimi was chosen.
and ef.

Slice of Life
2008-07-07, 02:34
The fifteen golden rules of mecha anime

1. Gigantic humanoid robots make military sense.
2. Yes they do.
3. Even in space.
4. War is bad. Now let's go and blow some stuff up.
5. A Japanese high schooler can figure out how to pilot a mecha in five minutes.
6. Only a Japanese high schooler can.
7. A mecha has less controls than your average car.
8. Any craft appearing in episode one that doesn't explode within 5 minutes is probably capable of transforming into a giant robot.
9. Or a part of a giant robot.
10. You can win any fight if you just really want to.
11. Yelling helps.
12. Especially attack names.
13. Girls however might also yell a lot but it never helps.
14. There is no such thing as "too much Gundam".
15. If you think obliterating 99.99 percent of humanity is a really bad thing you've never heard Minmay singing.

DragoonKain3
2008-07-07, 07:10
@qtip
Believe me, after Shuffle, it was very widespread in ASuki, but I didn't say nothing and just let the ignoramus carry on.

I finally blew my fuse during Sola, where people speculated a certain character is an osana-najimi and said she will be losing because they think she is one. Well for one, that character didn't trigger my O-N radar, and I was right; she wasn't a childhood friend after all. And the one that actually was, actually won. (No one guessed she actually was one though, but I had an inkling) During that time was when I made my big big list of series just to shut these people up, where 70% of the time if the O-N even just so happens to show up, the O-N won. And if one only counts the times where the O-N was a major contender, this rises to 80%. (up to 2007 series, this remains true)

But still, it didn't stop there. People in ASuki were still saying that because XXX major contender character from a certain series (Rental Magica, True Tears, KimiKiss, and Myself; Yourself threads off the top of my head) is the childhood friend, that they will lose because they tend to. The fact that they even try to contest the 70% win rate when I couldn't be any more generous to the other side was especially facepalm worthy for me. >_>

SeijiSensei
2008-07-07, 11:02
In Magic Users Club, there is NO SOUND IN SPACE. Never before in history has anyone seen such a novelty.

There are some other shows that portray space travel in a realistic manner. Planetes is the most obvious example. In Voices of a Distant Star the characters deal with relativistic time effects as well.

You'd think any intelligent person would know by now that you wouldn't hear the spacecraft, yet anime creators continue to break this fundamental rule of physics. I stopped watching Macross Frontier after the first episode in part because the spacecraft sounded like jet planes.

Sorrow-K
2008-07-07, 21:47
@qtip
Believe me, after Shuffle, it was very widespread in ASuki, but I didn't say nothing and just let the ignoramus carry on.

I finally blew my fuse during Sola, where people speculated a certain character is an osana-najimi and said she will be losing because they think she is one. Well for one, that character didn't trigger my O-N radar, and I was right; she wasn't a childhood friend after all. And the one that actually was, actually won. (No one guessed she actually was one though, but I had an inkling) During that time was when I made my big big list of series just to shut these people up, where 70% of the time if the O-N even just so happens to show up, the O-N won. And if one only counts the times where the O-N was a major contender, this rises to 80%. (up to 2007 series, this remains true)

But still, it didn't stop there. People in ASuki were still saying that because XXX major contender character from a certain series (Rental Magica, True Tears, KimiKiss, and Myself; Yourself threads off the top of my head) is the childhood friend, that they will lose because they tend to. The fact that they even try to contest the 70% win rate when I couldn't be any more generous to the other side was especially facepalm worthy for me. >_>

Most of the "winners" in shounen romance series are arbitrary anyway, so what difference does it make whether it's the osana-najimi or the tsundere? Romance isn't about which girl "wins"... or at least it shouldn't be, which is why I object to the fact that there exists an entire genre, a sizable one at that, dedicated to horse-races between female archetypes... particularly when they're vying for the affection of a bland self-insertable male lead.[/off-topic]

qtipbrit
2008-07-07, 22:54
I noticed from gundam seed:

No matter how a mecha explodes, the pilot's mask or or helmet will be found floating around space without a scratch.
I know this is a post from five years ago, but meh.

There's a reason pilots wear a helment/mask thing, it if wasn't really protective, then why the hell cover your head/face with it?
I finally blew my fuse during Sola, where people speculated a certain character is an osana-najimi and said she will be losing because they think she is one. Well for one, that character didn't trigger my O-N radar, and I was right; she wasn't a childhood friend after all. And the one that actually was, actually won. (No one guessed she actually was one though, but I had an inkling) During that time was when I made my big big list of series just to shut these people up, where 70% of the time if the O-N even just so happens to show up, the O-N won. And if one only counts the times where the O-N was a major contender, this rises to 80%. (up to 2007 series, this remains true)
But still, it didn't stop there. People in ASuki were still saying that because XXX major contender character from a certain series (Rental Magica, True Tears, KimiKiss, and Myself; Yourself threads off the top of my head) is the childhood friend, that they will lose because they tend to. The fact that they even try to contest the 70% win rate when I couldn't be any more generous to the other side was especially facepalm worthy for me. >_>
Slow down and take a deep breath, buddy. :heh:
I kind of but not really got that, and I guess I know which characters you were referring to. Having not seen Kimikiss and only the first episode of Rental Magica, I don't quite get those, either.

Aside from those two, I really can't name any other series where the osana najimi doesn't win, though. I think the number is higher than %70-80, though.
Most of the "winners" in shounen romance series are arbitrary anyway, so what difference does it make whether it's the osana-najimi or the tsundere? Romance isn't about which girl "wins"... or at least it shouldn't be, which is why I object to the fact that there exists an entire genre, a sizable one at that, dedicated to horse-races between female archetypes... particularly when they're vying for the affection of a bland self-insertable male lead.[/off-topic]
Let DK3 talk about osana najimi, it's what he does best.

And hey, those weren't all "shounen romance series". But in general, you're right; it really doesn't matter, which is why we can talk about it here, where no one cares about any of the stuff anyway. :)

DragoonKain3
2008-07-08, 08:08
@qtip
Last year, we had..
losses
Shuffle! Memories (though the winner is arguably an osana-najimi, but for arguements sake I let the other side have this)
5 cm/s (I was depressed for weeks after I've seen this masterpiece)
Heroic Age (Since when did the male side kick ever win a love triangle? XD)
Reideen (It was a PoS anime, especially when the O-N losing was the BEST thing that anime had going for it IMO)
Seto no Hanayome (She really wasn't a 'real' contender, so I'm not too worried)
Lovely Complex (He literally disappeared into nothingness lol)
Code-E (One of the best O-N characters I have ever seen, and so I was really sad at this loss)
Clannad (like SnH, she really wasn't a real contender anyways)
ef (you should know better than me about this one lol)

wins
Major 3rd season
Koutetsushin Jeeg
Kishin Taisen Gigantic Formula
Shining Tears X Wind
Sola
Tsubasa OVA
Kaze no Stigma
Dennou Coil
Kenkoo Zenrakei Suieibu Umishou
Potemayo
Moetan
Myself; Yourself
Ninomiya-kun
Genshiken 2
Kekkaishi
Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann
Bamboo Blade
KimiKiss
Baccano

9/28 losses, or 68% win rate last year if the childhood friend even so much appears for a second in the show. It fluctuates year to year, but it really is around 70% when I stack all the criteria against the childhood friend.

If you have any specific questions about my previous post (cuz I dun't know exactly what you didn't get lol), go ahead.


@Sorrow-K
So yes, in the grand scheme of things, it's not the destination that's important, but it's the journey. But I ask this: what about the motive to embark on said trip in the first place? Wouldn't that be as important as anything else, since without it the trip wouldn't even get started? The main reason why I am into anime is because I have grown disillusioned with western TV and Literature where sexual tension (God I so hate that phrase) is king; where bickering and arguing with each other is for some reason a sign of 'true love'.

Anime on the otherhand, generally favours the osana-najimi archetype; while there might be some that relies more on sexual tension, the vast majority of these couples are depicted to have a deeper understanding (some almost as if they're psychic) with each other. More often than not, they're shown to have transcended the limitations of sexual love and attraction, and have reached a deeper bond because of that.

And thus that's the reason why I started to watch (and am still watching) anime. I'm not into anime to see just a good story; I'm into anime to see a good story about the growth of couple who are basically each halves that make a whole. It's no different from people favouring horror stories because they like to be thrilled, action shows because they like to get excited, or tragic series because they like to be moved.

Do you get what I'm saying? If the entire reason why I'm watching anime in the first place is because I like how they portray the childhood friend relationship (as a relationship that has more or less reached agape), then wouldn't it make sense that I would care how often they win?

Because in all honesty, if I wanted to look JUST for a well-written story and/or deep characterization, anime would be the last place I would be looking for it, especially in the romance genre. As barring the rare exception, they're generally below average of what you'll see elsewhere.


And to be on topic... yes, it does matter how often the childhood friend wins. Because we're in the 'laws of anime' thread, where 'laws' are defined as something that happens more often than not. And yes, since the chldhood friend wins more often than not, thus its a 'law' as much as the other things listed here. XD

yezhanquan
2008-07-08, 08:28
TV Tropes are okay for trope names/descriptions. Speculations and examples are best taken lightly.

DragoonKain3
2008-07-08, 08:38
^
Yeah, I realize that. The problem was that in the post-Shuffle era, people (at least in ASuki) were under the impression that in anime the 'unlucky osananajimi' (which was its original title, which denotes it applies especially to anime) was the rule and not the exception. They have quoted this trope numerous times over the years as if it was 'law'. It was especially bad because its counterpart has only been added recently, so there was nothing to counterbalance that particular trope.

All I'm here for is to dispel that myth, particularly for anime (or anything Japanese related for that matter).

yezhanquan
2008-07-08, 09:02
^
Yeah, I realize that. The problem was that in the post-Shuffle era, people (at least in ASuki) were under the impression that in anime the 'unlucky osananajimi' (which was its original title, which denotes it applies especially to anime) was the rule and not the exception. They have quoted this trope numerous times over the years as if it was 'law'. It was especially bad because its counterpart has only been added recently, so there was nothing to counterbalance that particular trope.

All I'm here for is to dispel that myth, particularly for anime (or anything Japanese related for that matter).

I've never seen that trope, to be honest.

Mega-Japan
2008-10-28, 07:06
1.
War sucks.

2.
You CAN have too many women.

3.
Smart people wear glasses.

4.
Music foreshadows plot.

5.
The less you care about sex, the more opportunities you'll get.

6.
(Inversely, the harder you try, the less you'll get.)

7.
When you die, make a long speech, and don't finish the last sentence.

8.
Snow means love.

9.
The best teams come in fives.

10.
In space, you can hear everything.

11.
There's always room for flashbacks!

12.
When in China, listen to your tour guide.

13.
The good guy always has the BLUE glow.

14.
Speak quietly, pilot a big mech.

15.
Believe in goddesses.

16.
Teachers have excellent aim with small objects.

17.
Vengeance with a mallet is the sweetest revenge of all.

18.
Honor is sexy; villainy is irresistible.

19.
Women are attracted to losers; men are attracted to ANYTHING.

20.
The coolest weapon is still the sword.

21.
The hero is never really mad until they hurt his girlfriend.

22.
Female androids are sexy; male androids are....male androids.

23.
The green-haired alien girl will always betray her people for the man she loves.

24.
School uniforms are cool only when the collar is open.

25.
A show without sexual tension isn't worth watching.

26.
Love knows no race, species, or logic.

27.
If it's homemade but tastes bad, grin and bury it (discreetly).

28.
Never trust a huge corporation.

29.
Romance never comes simpler than in a triangle.

30.
Never fall for the girl who names her mech with a French name.

31.
Never fall in love with a psychic.

32.
You can never have too much hair.

33.
Sweating is a sure sign of stress.

34.
Daydreaming leads to accidents.

35.
Everyone wants to conquer Japan.

36.
The cute, fuzzy creature isn't what it seems.

37.
Cherry blossoms mean nostalgia.

38.
Always take gravity into account.

39.
Settings and faces are self-generating.

40.
Losing your temper can be therapeutic.

41.
There's nothing sexier than high heels on a mech.

42.
You can never have too many subplots.

43.
If she sings, she's doomed.

44.
You always remember the sad endings.

45.
Double suicide is romantic.

46.
Outrageous vehicles only make the hero cooler.

47.
Nothing delays romance like unruly neighbors.

48.
Fancy ice cream is for girls only.

49.
The most virtuous character will die.

50.
Hot water has innumerable benefits.


51.
No matter how much blood is lost, no one can die by a nosebleed.

52.
(The same theory above applies to vomiting.)

53.
The girl with the curly hair is always the seductress.

54.
If a sister falls in love with her brother, somewhere down the line you will discover that they're not blood related.

55.
The guy in the baseball cap is always more powerful than he seems.

56.
All demons/monsters have enormous genitalia.

57.
All young children can pilot mecha, you just need to give them a few days.

58.
It is possible to incorporate martial arts into any aspect of life.

59.
All high school kids in Japan have parents that are away on extended business trips.

60.
The oldest sister is the nice one, the youngest sister is the brash one.

61.
You can do anything to the human body as long as you hit the right pressure point.

62.
Consuming enormous amounts of alcohol daily will never have ill effects.

63.
All major villains either want to take over the world or blow it up.

64.
When someone paints up their face, they mean business.

65.
Everyone in Japan has excellent singing voices.

66.
No matter how many times you rebuild, Tokyo keeps getting destroyed in a massive fireball.

67.
The martial arts expert is always defenseless against a slap from the girl who loves him.

68.
TAKAHASHI'S LAW 1: Food is a powerful motivator.

69.
When women are sent out to fight the bad guys, there's always a hunk busily watching over them, often in secret.

70.
The longer it takes to say what your punch is called, the less effective it is.

71.
"Baka" does not mean a student going for his baccalaureate degree.

72.
The more possessive a woman gets, the less likely she will end up with the man of her dreams.

73.
TAKAHASHI'S LAW 2: The two-foot-tall old geezer is someone to be feared.

74.
No matter how big the mech/labor/mobile suit is, if it runs around the corner, the guy chasing it loses the trail.

75.
Extraterrestrial, demons, time travelers, etc. all want to alter the course of history by letting Oda Nobunaga win.

76.
The fate of the planet rests in the hands of the seemingly normal high school student.

77.
The heroine must shred her clothes while transforming into something to fight the bad guys.

78.
True evil can never be destroyed, only banished to some nether realm where it awakes after a few hundred years.

79.
TAKAHASHI'S LAW 3: When being hit on the head, it's the most natural thing in the world to tuck your third and fourth fingers in while keeping the others extended.

80.
Even the bravest souls can be made weak and helpless by the sight of a cute little puppy or kitten.

81.
Never love a Gundam pilot : you're just destined for disappointment (or a funeral).

82.
All persons under the age of 50 can do a ten foot vertical jump from a standing position.

83.
Never trust a guy with shiny teeth

84.
ESP causes more trouble than it solves

85.
The vampire isn't always the bad guy

86.
Nice things can come out of video stores that appear from nowhere

87.
Idiot captains win battles against impossible odds

88.
Order takeout at every opportunity--you might get lucky with a wrong number.

89.
The police are never anywhere there is a large amount of property damage.

90.
All high school principals in Japan are clinically insane.

91.
All people with esper powers give off multicolored auras.

92.
Just about any outer space villain has his sights set on destroying the Earth.

93.
(in conjunction with #92) No other planet in the universe will be able to stop said villain except the Earth.

94.
Any character can make a leap of 300 ft or more if given a good running start.

95.
A samurai sword can cut through anything.

96.
All characters over the age of 60 shrink in height in direct proportion to their age.

97.
When uncovering a fabulous treasure, the thing will be large enough to completely destroy any surrounding structures.

98.
TAKAHASHI'S LAW #4: An anti-climax is a good climax.

99.
Anime villains have the best deaths.

100.
Any love interest will always be possesed by a demon.

101.
Mallets can be stored anywhere on anybody.

102.
If the anime has the word "idol" in the title, then you know that it has to be good.

103.
Takada Yumi really does sing that bad, and people still buy her CDs.

104.
If you make enough porno movies, eventually you can get famous enough to star in commercials. "Iijima Ai desu! 'Manga manga no mori mori!!'"

105.
There is no such thing as a public anime showing without heckling.

106.
You can spot how popular a show is by looking at the number of H doujinshi it has.

107.
The smartest people on r.a.a. never post, which is why the conference's overall IQ is so low.

108.
If the lyrics to the OP song are printed on the screen, then you're watching a show that's not for your age group.

109.
The sexiest girls are drawn by artists whose last names start with "U".

110.
The English words in Jpop songs are put there only because they sound good, since they don't make any sense with the rest of the lyrics.

111.
If you post on the MLs more than Hitoshi does, then you probably post too much.

112.
The hero always loses the first fight with a new enemy.

113.
The guys with two earrings are from the Negaverse.

114.
Don't trust the guys with two earrings.

115.
Any truly evil person who changes sides for the woman he loves will die in that episode.

116.
You CAN do it, but only when it's funny or REALLY important.

117.
You can never have too many carrots.

118.
Hair comes in every shade of the rainbow - and we do mean pink, purple, blue, green....

119.
Fighter's Law: The Japanese heroine will always get her clothes rip off somewhere in the middle of the fight.

120.
The song "Cry Me a River" takes on a whole new meaning.

Solafighter
2008-10-28, 09:11
Typical in animes:

Girl:"Hey boy."
Boy:"Yeah?"
Girl:" ... ... Never mind."

Have seen hundred of animes with those scenes. :heh:

Aretsugu no Kimi
2008-10-30, 07:51
Originally I was going to post the following to "Foreign Stereotype" thread, but now determine to post it here.

1. Arab is wealthy and generous.
2. Chinese is crafty and also versed in martial arts.
3. Egyptian is not a Muslim but a Copt.
4. French is a cook or an artist.
5. German is a veteran and disciplines himself/herself.
6. Indian is an expert in either magic or technology.
7. Russian has beautiful looks and taciturn nature.
8. Swedish has pale-blue or brond hair.
9. Thai is faithful to his/her duties.
10. Venezuelan is a polite and kindly foe.

blitz1/2
2008-12-22, 11:33
100 laws of Anime:


#1 - Law of Metaphysical Irregularity- The normal laws of physics do not apply.

#2 - Law of Differential Gravitation- Whenever someone or something jumps, is
thrown, or otherwise is rendered airborne, gravity is reduced by a factor of 4.
Some things have been known to "Float" for a few seconds before plummeting to hit
the ground, vehicle, or someone’s cranium.

#3 - Law of Sonic Amplification, First Law of Anime Acoustics- In space, loud
sounds, like explosions, are even louder because there is no air to get in the way.

#4 - Law of Constant Thrust, First Law of Anime Motion- In space, constant thrust
equals constant velocity.

#5 - Law of Mechanical Mobility, Second Law of Anime Motion- The larger a
mechanical device is, the faster it moves, Armoured Mecha are the fastest objects
known to human science.

#6 - Law of Temporal Variability- Time is not a constant. Time stops for the hero
whenever he does something "cool" or "impressive". Time slows down when friends and
lovers are being killed and speeds up whenever there is a fight.

#7 - First Law of Temporal Mortality- "Good Guys" and "Bad Guys" both die in one of
two ways - either so quick they don’t even see it coming, OR it’s a long drawn out
affair where the character gains much insight to the workings of society, human
existence or why the toast always lands butter side down. NOTE: Sometimes, Anime
heroes or villains never really die! In these rare cases they were a clone or cyborg
and the real hero/villain’s suspiciously missing in "Malletspace", or something.

#8 - Second Law of Temporal Mortality- It takes some time for bad guys to die...
regardless of physical damage. Even when the "Bad Guys" are killed so quickly they
don’t even see it coming, it takes them a while to realize they are dead. This is
attributed to the belief that being evil damages the Reality Lobe of the brain.

#9 - Law of Dramatic Emphasis- Scenes involving extreme amounts of action are
depicted with either still frames or black screens with a slash of bright color
(usually red or white).

#10- Law of Dramatic Multiplicity- Scenes that only happen once, for instance, a
"Good Guy" kicks the "Bad Guy" in the face, are seen at least 3 times from 3
different angles.

#11- Law of Inherent Combustibility- Everything explodes. Everything.
First Corollary- Anything that explodes bulges first.
Second Corollary- Large cities are the most explosive substances known to
human science. Tokyo in particular seems to be the most unstable of these cities,
sometimes referred to as "The Matchstick City".

#12- Law of Phlogistatic Emission- Nearly all things emit light from fatal wounds.

#13- Law of Energetic Emission- There is always an energy build up (commonly
referred to as an energy "bulge") before Mecha or space craft weapons fire. Because
of the explosive qualities of weapons, it is believed that this is related to the
Law of Inherent Combustibility.

#14- Law of Inverse Lethal Magnitude- The destructive potential of any
object/organism is inversely proportional to its mass.
First Corollary- Small and cute will always overcome big and ugly. Also
known as the A-Ko phenomenon.

#15- Law of Inexhaustibility- No one EVER runs out of ammunition. That is of
course unless they are cornered, out-numbered, out-classed, and unconscious.

#16- Laws of Inverse Accuracy- The accuracy of a "Good Guy" when operating any form
of firearm increases as the difficulty of the shot increases. The accuracy of the
"Bad Guys" when operating firearms decreases when the difficulty of the shot
decreases. (Also known as the Stormtrooper Effect) Example: A "Good Guy" in a
drunken stupor being held upside down from a moving vehicle will always hit, and
several battalions of "Bad Guys" firing on a "Good Guy" standing alone in the middle
of an open field will always miss.
First Corollary- The more "Bad Guys" there are, the less likely they will
hit anyone or do any real damage.
Second Corollary- Whenever a "Good Guy" is faced with insurmountable odds,
the "Bad Guys" line up in neat rows, allowing the hero to take them all out with a
single burst of automatic fire and then escape.
Third Corollary- Whenever a "Good Guy" is actually hit by enemy fire, it is
in a designated "Good Guy Area", usually a flesh wound in the shoulder or arm,
which restricts the "Good Guy" from doing anything more strenuous than driving,
firing weaponry, using melee weapons, operating heavy machinery, or doing complex
martial arts maneuvers.
Fourth Corollary- The more times the "Bad Guy" fires, the fewer times he
will hit.

#17- Law of Transient Romantic Unreliability- Minimei is a bimbo. (Note: The
Minority Opposition in Ohio disagrees and thinks all men who like this stuff needs
to get out more.)

#18- Law of Hemoglobin Capacity- the human body contains over 12 gallons of blood,
sometimes more, under high pressure.

#19- Law of Demonic Consistency- Demons and other supernatural creatures have at
least three eyes, loads of fangs, tend to be yellow-green or brown, but black is not
unknown, and can only be hurt by bladed weapons. Also, acid has been known to work
just as well...

#20- Law of Militaristic Unreliability- Huge galaxy-wide armadas, entire armies, and
large war machines full of cruel, heartless, bloodthirsty warriors can be stopped
and defeated with a single insignificant example of a caring/loving emotion or a
song.
First Corollary- Whenever a single war machine (mecha, starship, etc.) goes
up against an entire army, the army always loses.

#21- Law of Tactical Unreliability- Tactical geniuses aren’t...

#22 -Law of Inconsequential Undetectability- People never notice the little
things... like missing body parts, or wounds the size of Seattle.

#23- Law of Juvenile Intellectuality- Children are smarter than adults. And almost
twice as annoying.

#24- Law of Americanthromorphism- Americans in Anime appear in one of two roles,
either as a really nasty skinny "Bad Guy" or a big stupid "Good Guy".
First Corollary- The only people who are more stupid than the big dumb
Americans are the American translators. (Sometimes referred to as the Green Line
Effect)
Second Corollary- The only people who are more stupid than the American
translators are the American editors and censors.
Third Corollary- Canadians are usually portrayed as smart, strong, handsome
"Good Guys".

#25- Law of Mandibular Proportionality- The size of a person’s mouth is directly
proportional to the volume at which they are speaking or eating.

#26- Law of Feline Mutation- Any half-cat/half-human mutation will invariably:
1) be female.
2) will possess ears and sometimes a tail as a genetic mutation.
3) wear as little clothing as possible, if any.

#27- Law of Conservation of Firepower- Any powerful weapon capable of
destroying/defeating an opponent in a single shot will invariably be reserved and
used as a last resort.

#28- Law of Technological User-Benevolence- The formal training required to operate
a spaceship or mecha is inversely proportional to its complexity.

#29- Law of Melee Luminescence- Any being displaying extremely high levels of
martial arts prowess and/or violent emotions emits light in the form of a glowing
aura. This aura is usually blue for "Good Guys" and red for "Bad Guys". This is
attributed to Good being higher in the electromagnetic spectrum than Evil.

#30- Law of Non-Anthropomorphic Antagonism- All ugly, non-humanoid alien races are
hostile, and usually hell-bent on destroying humanity for some obscure reason.

#31- Law of Follicular Chromatic Variability- Any color in the visible spectrum is
considered a natural hair color. This color can change without warning or
explanation.

#32- Law of Follicular Permanence- Hair in anime is pretty much indestructible, and
can resist any amount of meteorological conditions, energy emissions, physical
abuse, or explosive effects and still look perfect. The only way to hurt someone’s
hair is the same way you deal with demons... with bladed weapons!

#34- Law of Probable Attire- Clothing in anime follows certain predictable
guidelines: Female characters wear as little clothing as possible, regardless of
whether it is socially or meteorologically appropriate. Any female with an excessive
amount of clothing will invariably have her clothes ripped to shreds or torn off
somehow. If there is no opportunity to tear off aforementioned female’s clothes,
then she will inexplicably take a shower for no apparent reason (also known as the
Gratuitous Shower Scene). Whenever there is a headwind, Male characters invariably
wear long cloaks that don’t hamper movement and billow out dramatically behind them.
First Corollary (Cryo-Adaptability)- All anime characters are resistant to
extremely cold temperatures, and do not need to wear heavy or warm clothing in snow.
Second Corollary (Indecent Invulnerability)- Bikinis render the wearer
invulnerable to any form of damage.
Third Corollary (Probable Attire permanence)- The clothing on the hero is
indestructible. Their capes, robes, (and if they are girls,) skirts, dresses, bows,
or any loose clothing will just flap when they are in the middle of a fire or ice
attack... Unless it's a hentai. It is believed that the clothes are made out of
Anime Character hair. (re. Laws 32 & 48)

#35- Law of Musical Omnipotence- Any character capable of musical talent (singing,
playing an instrument, etc. Is automatically capable of doing much more "simple"
things, like piloting mecha, fighting crime, stopping an intergalactic war, and so
on... especially if they’ve never attempted these things before.

#36- Law of Quintupular Agglutination- Also called "The Five-man Rule", when "Good
Guys" group together, it tends to be in groups of five. There are five basic
positions, which are:
1) The Hero/Leader
2) His Girlfriend
3) His Best Friend/Rival
4) A Hulking Brute
5) A Dwarf/Kid
Between these basic positions are distributed several attributes, which include:
1) Extreme Coolness
2) Amazing Intelligence
3) Incredible Irritation

#37- Law of Extradimensional Capacitance- All anime females have an
extrasdimensional storage space of variable volume somewhere on their person from
which they can instantly retrieve any object at a moment’s notice. This mysterious
dimension is commonly called "Malletspace".
First Corollary (AKA The Hammer Rule)- The most common item stored is a
heavy mallet, costumes/uniforms, power suits/armor, and large bazookas.

#38- Law of Hydrostatic Emission- Eyes tend to be rather large in Anime. This is
because they contain several gallons of water, which may be instantaneously released
at high pressure through large tear ducts. The actual volume of water contained in
the eyes is unknown, as there is no evidence to suggest that these reservoirs are
actually capable of running out. The reason water tends to collect in the eyes is
because Anime characters only have one large sweat gland, which is located at the
back of the head. When extremely stressed , embarrassed, or worried, this sweat
gland exudes a single but very large drop of sebaceous fluid.

#39- Law of Inverse Attraction- Success at finding suitable mates is inversely
proportionate to how desperately you want to be successful. The more you want, the
less you get and vice-versa.
First Corollary- Unfortunately, this law seems to apply to Otaku in the real
world...

#40- Law of Nasal Sanguination- When sexually aroused, males in Anime don’t get
erections, they get nosebleeds. No one’s sure why this is, though... the current
theory suggests that larger eyes means smaller sinuses and thinner sinus tissue (see
Law #38 above). Females don’t get nosebleeds, but invariably get one heck of a blush
along the cheeks and across the nose, suggesting a lot of bloodflow to that region.

#41- Law of Xylolaceration- Wooden or bamboo swords are just as sharp as metal
swords, if not sharper.

#42- Law of Juvenile Omnipotence- Always send a boy to do a man’s job. He’ll get it
done in half the time and twice the angst.

#43- Law of Triscaquadrodecophobia- There is no Law #43.

#44- Law of Nominative Clamovocation- the likelihood of success and damage done by a
martial arts attack is directly proportional to the volume at which the full name of
the attack is announced (known as the Kamehameha effect).

#45- Law of Uninteruptable Metamorphosis- Regardless of how long or involved the
transformation sequence or how many times they’ve seen it before, any "Bad Guys"
witnessing a mecha/hero/heroine transforming are too stunned to do anything to
interrupt it.

#46- Law of Flimsy Incognition- Simply changing into a costume or wearing a teensy
mask can make you utterly unrecognizable to even your closest friends and relatives.

#47- Law of Mandibular Combustible Emission- All anime characters seem to have some
unknown chemical on their breath that reacts VERY violently with extremely hot or
spicy food. This chemical may also be responsible for the phenomenon of fire behind
the eyes and from the mouth when a character (usually a female) is really angry.

#48- Law of Electrical and Combustible Survivalism- If you get electrocuted or
burned, YOU WILL SURVIVE!! Though your entire body will be scorched, seconds later,
your skin won’t have a trace of damage (Also known as the "Pikachu Effect").
First Corollary- When a magical bad guy/Alien/monster fires off a flame,
wind, or ice attack, the resulting effect is only enough for the hero(es)/heroine(s)
to be standing in the "Walking Against the Wind" stance, with his/her eyes shut and
letting out a pathetic "Aaaaagh!", and yet they are never harmed. This may be in
part to laws 32, 34 and sometimes 44.

#49- Law of Female wrath- If a male character insults a female character, he will
get a mallet, shotgun, or tank blast, or if she is a character that can perform
magical feats, a fireball or whatever, to the head, body or whatever (Also known as
the "Lina Inverse/Gourry Factor") This is because he always deserves it, and will
help him to cope in today’s society. (>Sniff Sniff

#50- Law of Artistic Perversion- Most (not all) Anime artists are perverts and are
under the impression that girls are willing to tear off their clothes, or wear VERY
small, revealing outfits at the drop of a pin (or pen for that matter).
Unfortunately, most Hentai fans are under the same impression.

#51- Law of Uninteruptable Nominative Clamovocation- This law is a mixture of Laws
44 and 45. Regardless of how long or involved the Spell or projectile attack is, and
the likelihood of success and damage done by the volume at which the full name of
the attack is announced, or how many times they’ve seen it before, any "Bad Guys"
witnessing a hero/heroine quoting the incantations for an extremely powerful attack
are too stunned to do anything to interrupt it. (Also known as the "Dragon Slave
Phenomenon")

52- Law of Telepathic Obliviousness- Most of the time, some Anime characters
(usually males) will think personal (Like that he/she has sabotaged something), or
perverted thoughts, while near some other character, WHO’S TELEPATHIC!! The reasons
for this are:
1) They forgot that the person is telepathic.
2) They just don’t give a damn.
The reasons the telepathic person doesn’t react are:
1) They’re preoccupied with doing something else.
2) They’d rather keep the fact to themselves that they are Telepathic.
3) They just don’t give a damn.

+#53- Law of Chromatic Diversity- Air can be any color of the viewable spectrum.

+#54- Law of Old Man Comic Relief- Comic relief comes in the form of a short, bald,
wise-mouthed dirty old man or alien. Or the combination of any two of those traits.
First Corollary- If old man is present, and is acting too horny, stupid,
etc., there will invariably be an old woman to whap him over the head with a frying
pan or something.

+#55- Law of the Wise Old Man- Little old Japanese men always know how it ends and
withhold the ending from anyone, especially the hero. This includes special power
weapons, ancient relics, and people who know everything.

+#56- Law of Omnipotent Unreliability- Any "Bad Guy" with Omnipotent powers/weapons
will never use those powers/weapons against the "Good Guy" until it is too late.
First Corollary- All "Bad Guys" suffer from Antagonistic Boasting Syndrome
which require all "Bad Guys" to threaten with or exemplify their prowess and not use
it against the "Good Guy".
Second Corollary- No "Bad Guy" may use any new, secret, or superior military
device without one of the following events occurring:
a) The control device being broken.
The control device being taken by the "Good Guy".
c) The control device is in fact not the real device at all and was just
"fooled" by the "Good Guy".
d) The "Bad Guy" has already lost and cannot use the device.

+#57- Law of Minimum Corneal Volume- Eyeballs may make up no less than one sixth of
the face’s total surface area. More so if the case is a blonde woman.

+#58- Law of Electrical Charges in Hair- Hair attracts electricity in abundance,
resulting in two outcomes:
a) A positive charge will result in the spikes-flying-everywhere-behind-me
look.
A negative charge will result in the
hair-cascading-down-to-the-waist-in-a-single-sheet look.

+#59- Law of Ammunition Accuracy- When there are multiple types of ammunition
available (paintballs, speaker pods), non-lethal rounds will always be more accurate
when compared to "standard" or lethal shots. (Macross Plus for paintballs, Macross 7
for speaker pods)

+#60- Law of Active Female Attraction- In a comedy series, a male character’s
attractiveness to women is inversely proportional to how active they pursue them.
(Tenchi, Ranma, and Makoto OVA have a seemingly endless supply of willing
girlfriends despite their lack of romantic skill while Happosai, Ataru, and Carrot
couldn’t get a date despite or because of their constant attempts.)

+#61- Law of Sweat Pore Variability- When a person is embarrassed, caught in an
awkward situation, or otherwise humiliated, all sweat pores on the body contract,
except for ones on the forehead. These pores expand to such a degree that a single
drop could fill a Big Gulp from 7-11.

+#62- The Law of Inverse Training Time- A person who has been training for 3 years
is never as good as someone who has been training for one month.

+#63- Law of Needs to Few and Many- The needs of the many, outweigh the needs of the
few... of even the one.

+#64- Law of Bad Humor- Whenever someone says something that is intended to be
funny, whether actually funny or not, the rest of the characters (even animals) fall
to the ground with their feet in the air. Sweat sometimes accompanies the fall.
(The sound of a cow mooing usually accompanies the joke as well.)

+#65- Law of Extreme Anger- Whenever a female character gets mad, such as seeing the
male character with another girl, she becomes extremely strong (despite her usually
helpless look) so that she can lift a 1000 ton object to hurt the guy. She can
sometimes perform other punishments that are just as cruel such as pinching the
guy’s face so hard that it changes shape. (see law #49)

+#66- Law of Differentiated Gravitation-
First Corollary- If the airborne entity exceeds an altitude equal or greater
than two times the height of the entity, gravity is decreased by an inverse
coefficient relative to the upward momentum and mass/weight (if within at least
500 km of any gravity source) of the entity "jumping".
Second Corollary- The amount of Newtonian "opposite force" (in accordance to
normal downward velocity; "Earth gravity" speed is equal to 32ft/sec/sec) is also
inversely proportional to the "actual" speed of the airborne entity. In all
actuality, an entity that appears to be flying towards a solid concrete parking lot
from space will actually land, producing an opposite force of approximately 1.73 lb.
of pressure. Unless this particular entity is a "Bad Guy". Then the law exhibits a
mysterious exponentially proportional Newtonian opposite force, thusly increasing
this variable by a factor equal to the inverse-gravity potential.

+#67- Law of Conservation of Ambient Dramatic Tension- In any situation where the
Ambient Dramatic Tension increases, the "Good Guy’s" Style Coefficient must be
increased by a proportional amount to compensate. In any situation where this does
not happen, the "Bad Guy" inevitably comes out on top. However, this usually leads
to a further rise in the Ambient Dramatic tension, which will always be offset by
an exponential increase in the "Good Guy’s" Style Coefficient.

+#68- Law of Coercive Vehicular Control- No matter how complex or well defined the
control system, a character controlling a vehicle of any sort always does so through
means of undetectable subconscious psychokinesis.
First Corollary- Characters can perform actions with their vehicles which
clearly defy normal physics (see Laws of Metaphysical Irregularity and Constant
Thrust). The velocity, attitude and traction of the vehicle appear to be adjusted at
will, with the degree of absolute control being proportional to the complexity and
lethality of the maneuver.
Second Corollary- It is effectively impossible to remove characters from or
disrupt the passage of their vehicles without the character’s consent. This does not
always apply to "Bad Guy" characters, or "Good Guy" characters in situations where
the Ambient Dramatic Tension could increase in accordance with the Law of
Conservation of Ambient Dramatic Tension.

+#69- Amendment to the Law of Conservation of Ambient Dramatic Tension- In any
situation where the Ambient Dramatic Tension increases without a corresponding
increase in the "Good Guy’s" Style Coefficient, not only does the "Bad Guy" usually
come out on top, but also his Smugness Factor increases in proportion to the rise in
Ambient Dramatic Tension.

+#70- Law of The Rushing Background Effect- Whenever something dramatic occurs, a
survival instinct engages, thus rendering all incoming stimulus that is not directly
and immediately to the dramatic situation at hand a meaningless blur. This is often
referred to as "The Rushing Background Effect". Due to the increase in brain
activity and adrenaline levels in the bloodstream, the scene is often played out in
slow motion.

+#71- Law of Interdimensional Hammers- Whenever a female character witnesses a male
character of her preference performing any sort of questionable act (i.e. Looking at
another girl or anything she might construe as perverted) she can reach into an
interdimensional realm (usually behind her back) and withdraw a huge Anime Mallet of
Doom with which to whack the said male over the head with. (see Laws # 37, 49, and
65)

+#72- Law of Instant Band-Aids- Whenever a character is injured (usually in a head
shot, maybe from a mallet whack) Band-Aids will always instantly appear on the
wounded individual (and always in pairs, set in a cross fashion). These bandages
will then, most likely, disappear by the character’s next scene.

+#73- Law of Universal Edge Defense- Any projectile attack, from a blast of magic to
a hail of bullets, can be easily defended against by holding a suitably cool-looking
sword or other bladed weapon between the attacker and defender, usually so that the
edge cuts into the incoming attack(s), causing both halves to go flying harmlessly
past the defender. Observed most often in fantasy and martial arts anime.

+#74- Law of Intractable Sanity- There is no such thing as insanity in anime. When
faced with horrifying supernatural forces that would drive most men mad, anime
characters will either:
a) Die quickly (but in accordance with all other laws e.g., slowdown and
exposition),
Get possessed by them, especially if they are beautiful girls or men in a
position to ravish beautiful girls, or
c) Kill them, wipe the blood off their blades, and walk on whistling.

+#75- Law of Celestial Body Control- At a dramatically correct moment, a hero can
summon a sun/moon/halo to appear behind him/her to cause a dramatic silhouette.

+#76- Law of Aura of Forgetfulness- Any hero who wishes his/her identity to remain a
secret will invariably succeed regardless of disguise because everyone around
him/her will forget everything. Otherwise, how does Sailor Moon keep her disguise?

+#77- Law of Cool Hair Factor- The hair of a hero will always coalesce into thick
strands that drape his face into a dramatic fashion, regardless of wind, the
elements, etc. (see Laws 32 & 48)

+#78- Law of Inverse Coping- Any single event will happen to the ONE character LEAST
capable of dealing with it.

#79- Law of Martial Arts Training Invulnerability- The Myth that certain martial
arts will enable you to become so strong, that you can stop a nuclear warhead with
your bare palm. Unfortunately, for most otaku, they found the hard way that it just
doesn’t work in real life...

#80- Law of Stereotype Captain characteristics- If a captain of any type of ship is
male, he will invariably wear a big captain’s cap, a long overcoat, and have a
shaggy beard and mustache (pipe optional), and be a great tactician. If the captain
is female, however, she will invariably be young, well endowed, and ditzy as a pole
(horny father optional). Yet, she too will be a great tactician.

#81- Law of Shades/Coolness Factor- Shades can make you instantly cool, even if
you’re normally a klutz.

#82- Law of Hentai Plot- The proper response to any change in the plotline of a
Hentai anime is to start having sex.

#83- Law of Understatement- Anything that is deemed too impossible will become
possible.
First Corollary- Any "Bad Guy" stating "T-that’s impossible!" whenever the
hero is accomplishing some new feat/move/projectile will find out too late that he
is wrong and will invariably be toastied.

#84- Law of Dormant Powers- Anytime a hero is somehow outpowered and/or outclassed
by the villain, he will invariably release powers/new moves he never knew he could
accomplish... but his old teacher did!

#85- Law of Style Coefficient- In a situation where a Good guy may be in dire
straits, he will become stronger, smarter and more cool in a matter of seconds. (see
Laws #67, 69, and 84)

#86- Law of Bad Guy Smugness Factor- Whenever the villain actually succeeds in
beating the hero, they will begin to gloat uncontrollably, because they’ve never won
against the "Good Guy" (because they’re Eeeviiil!!). They usually get so cocky, they
tie the hero to a conveyor belt leading to his doom and leave to get a snack.
Usually this results in:
a) The hero escaping.
Clean-up for the underlings.
c) The villain getting toastied.

#87- Law of Tableware Nonexistence- There IS no spoon.

#88- Law of Goofy Turn-Ons- In Hentai, ordinary , pedestrian objects sometimes have
the magical power of either inducing orgasm or arousal. Some include warm water,
rolling on a smooth tabletop, wind, mild electrocution, the character toweling
themselves after a bath/shower, and very cold objects... like bottles of 7-up.

#89- Law of Penile Variance- All Anime men in Hentai have a ridiculously large
penis (lengths of 8, 9, 10 and 11 inches are most common). Some even have ones the
size of telephone poles, despite the blood loss that would accompany it...

#90-Law of Hentai Female Characteristics- All Hentai women have the following
characteristics:
1) Very sensitive and/or very large breasts with large nipples.
2) Very tight and/or sensitive vaginas.

#91- Law of Vaginal Variance- Hentai Anime women can take penis lengths of 8" and
up... completely... despite the fact that they might have a tight and/or sensitive
vagina.

#92- Law of Hero Identification- All heroes are introduced by way of appearance
while someone talking about their (in)famous-ness, or by way of a voice-over of them
introducing themselves.

#93- Law of Cute Mascots- Any anime either Shojo or Shonen has GOT to have at
least one cute, furry little mascot by penalty of death!
First Corollary- If it is a Shonen Anime, the hero will be accompanied by a
Dog, Cat or any kind of animal, real or fake, that would be found with a hero of the
male persuasion. Any animal that would be associated with girls that is following
him around is there because:
1) It’s his girlfriend’s.
2) It is following him, despite his insistence not to do so.
3) Chicks will dig him more.
Second Corollary- If it is a Shojo Anime, the heroine will be accompanied by
a cat, cute lil’ mouse, or some disgustingly cute monster, or any kind of animal,
real or fake, that would be found with a hero of the female persuasion. Any animal
that would be associated with guys that is following her around is there because:
1) It’s her boyfriend’s.
2) It is following her, despite her insistence not to do so.
3) It makes her look cool.

#94- Law of The Force- Most Anime heroes are blessed with a unique sort of ability
that enables bad things to happen to those that deserve it or makes things like
bullets or debris totally miss them (Also referred to as "Dumb Luck"), even though
they are mostly unaware of it. Those who have this ability include Vash the
Stampede, Captain Justy Ueki Tylor, and Jar Jar Binks.

#95- Law of Naughty Tentacles- All Anime Tentacles are VERY horny and will rape any
human female, regardless of age ("She’s 18! No! Really, she is! I’m not lying!...")
First Corollary- Even when raped or molested by tentacles, Hentai Anime
girls eventually get into it & begin squealing in ecstasy. NO one knows WHY this is,
but some theorize there may be some kind of chemical that is secreted through the
skin of the tentacle...
Second Corollary- Women who are impregnated by a tentacle creature never
experience morning sickness, and also find it to be intensely pleasurable (Also
known as the Goofy Meter Redline Effect).
Third Corollary- Similarly, the resulting... offspring of tentacle/human
relations is immediately sexually active, often impregnating its own mother again.

#96- Law of Cat-Fighting- Two females with a grudge can and will go at each other,
sometimes ripping off clothes. Sometimes it escalates so much, that property damage
begins to occur.
First Corollary- A running fight can be so destructive, you can follow it
from a distance just by watching for the smoke. (Also known as the "A-ko/B-ko
Thing")

#97- Law of Healing- Most anime heroes have a Wolverine-like healing factor that
enables them to regenerate from a massive wound or broken bone within minutes. Being
immortal sometimes helps. (Also known as the "Priss Effect".)

#98- Law of Stereotype Crew Characteristics- All ships, either waterborne or
spaceborne, have the following crew members:
1) The captain
2) His Lieutenant
3) Various female technical staff
4) A hotshot pilot
5) A cute little girl/twins (either stowaways or not)
6) The Doctor
7) The Doctor’s assistant (either a spy or not)
Weighted among the crew are various quirks which include:
1) Extreme coolness/luck
2) Amazing Intelligence
3) Incredible irritation
4) Extreme cuteness
5) Irresponsible drunkenness
6) Homophobicness
7) Emotionless (Idiots.)

#99- Law of Sparklies- Whenever a character of the main character’s interest
appears, flowers, sparkles, or abstract circles of pastel colors appear around said
character, or both. Roses with exaggerated thorns appear when it is dangerous love.
No one knows why this is, though most have a theory: Anime characters are freaks! At
least, Marker Apenname seems to think so...

#100- Law of Anime Events- Much like wrestling, anything and everything can happen.

Tri-ring
2008-12-22, 19:58
Although not all but I think this AMV discribes alot.

wh2kI8LFIE0

Shadow Kira01
2008-12-22, 21:02
Everybody seems to have long lists. Mine is rather short:

1) War is bad.
2) The good guys don't always win.
3) The intelligent and charismatic is usually on the side of the antagonists.
4) The terrorists are usually the good guys.
5) The protagonist of love comedies are usually the foolish type.
6) The protagonist of mecha anime are usually somewhat antagonistic.
7) If you are not always ready to fight, an ambush by the enemies can be costly.
8) If you are not willing to kill the enemy in battle, the chances of you getting killed is doubled.
9) It is entirely possible for a junior high kid to save the world.
10) Controversies are the key to make an anime or manga popular.

Cut-Tongue
2008-12-22, 21:47
If there are trees and sunshine, there MUST be a tsukutsuku-boushi (a type of cicada) around.

Terrestrial Dream
2008-12-22, 22:10
Courage will overcome anything :).

kyon.haruhi.suzumiya
2008-12-22, 23:42
Everybody seems to have long lists. Mine is rather short:

1) War is bad.
2) The good guys don't always win.
3) The intelligent and charismatic is usually on the side of the antagonists.
4) The terrorists are usually the good guys.
5) The protagonist of love comedies are usually the foolish type.
6) The protagonist of mecha anime are usually somewhat antagonistic.
7) If you are not always ready to fight, an ambush by the enemies can be costly.
8) If you are not willing to kill the enemy in battle, the chances of you getting killed is doubled.
9) It is entirely possible for a junior high kid to save the world.
10) Controversies are the key to make an anime or manga popular.

^^ That's more like the laws of SUNRISE. Yeah, Sunrise and Gainax, I think.

tbl
2008-12-24, 19:31
Fights will almost invariably follow this pattern (unless they span over multiple episodes):

When fighting a named mook

The mook will start off winning, before the protagonist reveals that he is "not really left handed" and then will defeat the mook.

When fighting an antagonist (A)

The protagonist will start of winning or the match will be more or less even.
The villain will begin to fight seriously and the protagonist will be in serious trouble.
The protagonist will then get a power up or harden their heroic resolve, before winning.
Note: There can be more ebbs and flows if it is a serious antagonist.

When fighting a higher level antagonist (usually one of the boss characters, if not the boss) (B)

The protagonist will start of winning or the match will be more or less even.
The villain will begin to fight seriously and the protagonist will be in serious trouble.
The villain will then leave the protagonist alive for some poorly explained reason.
The protagonist will heal after a while, before receiving some training from hell.
The protagonist will go to face the antagonist once again.
Start from pattern A

Some other rules

Numbers never win. The lone fighter will always win
If the protagonists ever need a plan to defeat the antagonist, they will loose, because real heroes fight with honour and using intelligence and plans isn't honourable.

wontaek
2008-12-24, 23:19
One pertinent law of the moment is

If someone says to the other that they will be together forever, one of them will die within a year.

NoSanninWa
2008-12-25, 01:45
One pertinent law of the moment is

If someone says to the other that they will be together forever, one of them will die within a year.

If I may quote Tower of Druaga...
"After this is over, I'm going to get married."

tbl
2008-12-25, 02:56
The quality of a romance anime is inversely proportional to the amount of drama derived from a lack of simple communication between the lead characters.