Main Otome song

[Catgirls]

Originally posted by Mich666:
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By Nina:

Kokoro no mado no tatsu
Sadame no yokogao
Tomoshimashou yume wo
Matataku negai...
Hoshi ga tada hitori
Erabe to tsugeru
Ai suru hito ga
Watashi wo yobeba kawaru

That destined face...
stands next to the window in my heart.
Let's light up my dream;
my twinkling dream.
The star tells me to
choose just one person.
Oh, when my beloved person,
when they call my name, I'll know it's them.

By Arika:

Hoshi ni naru kibou
Ashita ga mieru
Ai suru hito yo matete...

Hopes that become the stars.
I can see into tommorow.
Oh, my beloved, wait for me.

Do you think that this song will be closely linked to story such as was It's only the fairytale? Can we find out from it where the story will go in next few episodes? And why do you think Sergay don't want anybody else know that Arika knows it?

[Catgirls]

Originally posted by Mich666:
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I've finally found lyrics for DreamWing so here it is ~_^

Dream☆Wing
作詞・曲(Lyrics&Composition)：栗林みな美 (Kuribayashi Minami)
編曲(Arrangement)：飯塚昌明 (Iidzuka Masaaki)
歌(Performance)：栗林みな美 (Kuribayashi Minami)

見つけたの dream
ドキドキがとまらない
生まれたの 宝物
胸いっぱいにきらめき始める

どうしてこんなに不安になるのかな
抱えきれない思い
涙こぼれるけど。。。

きっといつか辿り漬けるよ
つまづいたって諦めない
勇気だして前に進もう
小さな一歩踏み出せば
ほらね、新しい私

いつだって smile
力をくれるでしょう
晴れ日も、雨の日も
輝いていたい太陽みたいに

もう 俯くのはやめて走りだそう
心の痛みは
そう ”大好き” の証ね

忘れないであの日の気持ち
空に向かって祈っていた。。。
私だけの夢の翼がどこかにあるの
捜し出せたなら
未来へ飛べるね

その先に待ってるステージへと
私らしく行こう！
ずっと描き続けていたの。。。 story

きっといつか辿り漬けるよ
つまづいたって諦めない
勇気だして前に進もう
小さな一歩踏み出せば
ほらね、新しい私

mitsuketa no dream
dokidoki ga tomaranai
umaretano takaramono
mune ippai ni kirameki hajimeru

doushite konna ni fuan ni naru no kana
kakae kirenai omoi
namida koboreru kedo...

kitto itsuka tadori tsukeru yo
tsumadzui tatte akiramenai
yuuki dashite mae ni susumou
chiisana ippo fumi daseba
hora ne, atarashii watashi

itsu datte smile
chikara wo kureru deshou
hare no himo, ame no himo
kagayaite itai taiyou mitai ni

mou utsumuku no wa yamete hashiri dasou
kokoro no itami wa
sou "daisuki" no akashi ne

wasurenaide ano hi no kimochi
sora ni mukatte inotte ita...
watashi dake no yume no tsubasa ga dokokani aru no
sagashideseta nara
ashita e toberu ne

sono saki ni matteru STAGE e to
watashi rashiku yukou!
zutto egaki tsudzuke teita no... story

kitto itsuka tadori tsukeru yo
tsumadzui tatte akiramenai
yuuki dashite mae ni susumou
chiisana ippo fumi daseba
hora ne, atarashii watashi

[Catgirls]

Originally posted by paTKany
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I can't translate it, but i can type it:

目覚めを待つ国の　むかしのはなし
ささげましょう胸に　宿るひかり
星になるきぼう　あしたが見える
愛するひとよ　待ってておくれ

こころの窓に立つ　さだめの横顔
ともしましょう夢を　守るひかり
星はただひとり　選べと告げる
愛するひとが　わたしを呼べば変わる

うるわしく立ち舞う　けがれなき羽
背負いましょう御子の　命のひかり
星になるために　生まれてはならぬ
愛するひとに　 抱かれてねむれ

mezame wo matsu kuni no mukashi no hanashi
sasagemashou mune ni yadoru hikari
hoshi ni naru kibou ashita ga mieru
ai suru hito yo mattete okure

kokoro no mado ni tatsu sadame no yokogao
tomoshimashou yume wo mamoru hikari
hoshi wa tada hitori erabe to tsugeru
ai suru hito ga watashi wo yobeba kawaru

uruwashiku tachi mau kegarenaki hane
seoimashou miko no inochi no hikari
hoshi ni naru tame ni umarete wa naranu
ai suru hito ni idakarete nemure

[Catgirls]

Originally posted by Tremalkinger
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Originally Posted by Mich666
so it is Arika, Nina, Mashiro - in this order...

Can anyone translate it?First off, let's transcribe what translations Static has already done for me:

"...Hope that becomes the stars; I can see into tomorrow.
Oh my beloved, wait for me...

That destined face stands next to the window in my heart.
Let's light up my dream; my twinkling dream;
The star tells me to choose just one person.
Oh, when my beloved person calls me name, I'll know its them.

These precious times, this untainted light.
Let's examine your hands and eyes for the radiance of life.
In order to become stars, we are born and educated.
We go to sleep held by our loved ones."

Remember the order is Arika, Nina, Mashiro. Arika's verse is incomplete, because Sergey walks in on her singing, and cuts her off before the final word. Now, I know there are people who are about a hundred times more proficient in Japanese, and they'd translate this a lot better, but I'm going to take a shot at finishing her verse. Here are the first two lines:


"Wait before you wake in the country of stories about ancient times.
Let's dedicate our chests to birthing the light."

The second line especially is wierd as hell.

Sasagemashou means a bunch of things, and any of them could really fit: to lift up; to give; to offer; to consecrate; to devote; to sacrifice; to dedicate.

The kanji directly after that, mune, means either chest or breasts. Then we have verb 'to become pregnant', followed by 'light'.

Finally, in Episode three, Sergey walks in on her, cutting off her final word 'okure'. It means 'to be late', so I'm going to loosely translate her final line as 'Wait for me, even though I'm late', but I'm not really sure.

Well, that's that. Speculate away.

Edit: Leave it to Sunrise to put a pun into a lullaby. It could translate to 'dedicate our chests', which makes sense for the 'birth' part, but it could also mean 'lift up our breasts'. Oh Sunrise...

[Catgirls]

Originally posted by J-Chan
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Originally Posted by b0nyb0y
It seems almost like each part of the song, each singer is calling out for the other. One of them tells the other one to wait, and the other one said when 'that person' call her name, she will know. Almost like one of them is the master, and the other is her destined Otome...

Yes, I'm suggesting that, for these two girls (Nina and Arika), one of them is the princess, and the other is Rena's daughter. It seems like the responsibility of the mothers were passed down to the next generation.Yes well in ep... 7 i think (the one with the giant organ) When Mashiro is standing and looking at the pics of her "parents" the first thing i noticed was that Nina and the Queen have the same eyes and mannerisms same with Arika and her "mom"

http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y105/serenityjc17/vlcsnap-4775231.png
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y105/serenityjc17/vlcsnap-4776701.png
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y105/serenityjc17/vlcsnap-4778295.png
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y105/serenityjc17/vlcsnap-1653667.png

[Catgirls]

Originally posted by Jadewing
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Which, of course, begs the question: what does Mashiro's verse say?

I'll grant you, I probably know the least Japanese of anyone here, but near as I can tell, the title, loosly translated, comes out something like "The Tale the Star Tells" or "What the Star Tells Me" (feel free to correct me on that).

What gets me, however, is that each verse follows roughly the same set pattern: the same basic rhythm, tempo, and spacing of words and breaths. Dead in the middle of each singer's part, as the tempo goes from low-high-low-high to high-low-high-low, and as the music changes to accompany it, each one starts that line with 'hoshi', and then the next with 'ai suru hito'.

Arika: hoshi ni naru kibou ashita ga mieru
Nina: hoshi wa tada hitori erabe to tsugeru
Mashiro: hoshi ni naru tame ni umarete wa naranu

Arika: ai suru hito yo mattete oku
Nina: ai suru hito ga watashi wo yobeba kawaru
Mashiro: ai suru hito ni idakarete nemure


The question, however, is that given that there -is- a blue star in the series that keeps getting pointed out oh-so-well, is it not possible that the song, the harmonium, and the star are all inter-related? I suppose you could stretch it, and say it mimicks the way the fight "Fairy Tale" described, the underground pillars, and the HiME star all were.... though it seems a passing resemblance at best...


Still, if each of the girls are singing about what the Star tells them....

[Mich666]

I have found only this - Hoshi ga Kanageru Monogatari text in kanji:

http://img518.imageshack.us/img518/1057/bonus0pt.jpg

heck, one of the latest post to this topic was the most important but I can't find it.... :( I don't know who posted it but it was very good work - post was in three colors (green, red a black letters) and it was analysis of this song with correction of mistakes that static did in their fansub... Wish I can find it...

[KiraDouji]

heck, one of the latest post to this topic was the most important but I can't find it.... :( I don't know who posted it but it was very good work - post was in three colors (green, red a black letters) and it was analysis of this song with correction of mistakes that static did in their fansub... Wish I can find it...

*raises hand* That was me... I KNEW I should have saved that to my computer. :frustrated: Fear not I still have the paper copy *somewhere*. I shall find it tonight, but as this comp doesn't do Japanese, I cannot post until tomorrow. ><; I'll re-write it to the best of my ability, though. :heh:

- Kira

[Tremalkinger]

/hug Kira

I thought I had it saved somewhere but... it is eluding me :(

[kazekiri]

Originally posted by Jadewing
I'll grant you, I probably know the least Japanese of anyone here, but near as I can tell, the title, loosly translated, comes out something like "The Tale the Star Tells" or "What the Star Tells Me" (feel free to correct me on that).That's a better translation than I got. I looked up kanaderu and found 'to play (a musical instrument)'. Didn't make much sense.

[-KarumA-]

after 15 minutes of listening to this song over and over agin i typed out lyrics, though im not good at spelling things but i will find someone to spell it correctly, a friend of mine is good at it ^^

this are the lyrics of track 1 of the ost

Otome no Komoriuta


camenta sakia bastiva merter bisare story

averta sorta bastiya merter somai dorin

amane yaisamiya

imertai sommia

anetai captida

isomeri someri tedi story

[Mich666]

*raises hand* That was me... I KNEW I should have saved that to my computer. :frustrated: Fear not I still have the paper copy *somewhere*. I shall find it tonight, but as this comp doesn't do Japanese, I cannot post until tomorrow. ><; I'll re-write it to the best of my ability, though. :heh:
Good news you can rewrite it :)

[KiraDouji]

Okay, so, gotta love IRONY. I say "hey, I'll get it out in a day" and then suddenly discover the rule of "don't swap forums, or you'll get banned for five days quicker than you can say 'what'd I do?'." So now "I'll rewrite it in a day" equals "I'll rewrite it when I have an hour unrestricted access to a comp that can write in Japanese". Spiffy.

Anyway, just thought I'd say sorry for not getting it out when I said I would and Happy Holidays - the translation will be here soon, promise --;;;

- Kira

[KiraDouji]

PLEASE READ THE EDITS, THE THIRD STANZA TRANSLATION HAS CHANGED

So I gave up waiting for a computer and simply installed the damned language pack on this one. :heh: So, without further ado, the translation and the tons of paragraphs and comparison to previous translations :D

目覚めを待つ国の　むかしのはなし
Wait to wake in the country of legends
ささげましょう胸に　宿るひかり
Let us raise up the light living in our hearts
星になるきぼう　あしたが見える
Our aspirations become stars, I can see tomorrow
愛するひとよ　待ってておくれ
Oh beloved, please be waiting...

こころの窓に立つ　さだめの横顔
The destined profile stands at the window of my heart
ともしましょう夢を　守るひかり
Let's illuminate the light of dreams obeyed
星はただひとり　選べと告げる
The star tells me to choose only one
愛するひとが　わたしを呼べば変わる
When my beloved calls out I will transform

うるわしく立ち舞う　けがれなき羽
Beautifully stand and dance (with?) untainted wings
背負いましょう御子の　命のひかり
(I) will carry the (light of) the life of the emperor's child on my back
星になるために　生まれてはならぬ
I must not be born for the sake of becoming a star
愛するひとに　 抱かれてねむれ
Sleep, embraced by your loved one.

The following is an explaination of my word choice and simply in general about my translations here. I'm open to discussion of everything that is not the translation of "mune". This is indisputable with me. Yes the word can mean the physical breast/chest area on a person. It also and more often means the theological heart. In every single shoujo series I've ever seen if the word "mune" is there, it is translated to "heart". Moreover, this is a poem/song which means that it's much more likely for the author to want more than a straight forward meaning. So, everything else is up for discussion, but if you tell me "mune" doesn't mean "heart" I'll ignore you. :P

Now, for the reasons and comparisons...

To me, this poem clearly represents three different voices. The first stanza is a warning. The second is, well, like a vision. The last is prophecy-esque. These are the feelings envoked by the wording, flow and general feel of each section as well as the people who are singing each part. These interpretations had a lot to do with my word choice.

ARIKA'S STANZA
The first line is relatively simple. The only confusing/debatable part is which part of the sentence "待つ" and "目覚め" are referring to. The words "国の　むかしのはなし" could easilly be read as "the country's legends" except that "の" can not only denote posession but also be translated to "of", so, in this case, "country of legends" fits. The further question, then is whether or not "待つ" which means "to wait" is applied to the country or to waking. Here, thankfully, the decision is made for us thanks to the particle "を" which denotes the direct object "待つ" is supposed to be applied to. Therefore, you have two halves of a sentence: "Wait to wake" and "country of legends". The problem was only that because this is a poem, the connection between the two halves of the line is implied. To me, because of the feeling of warning throughout this stanza, I translated the meaning to "in", as if to say "be careful of waking in a country of legends".

The second line has more word choice issues than the first. Originally, it was thought to mean something along the lines of "giving birth" to a feeling literally residing in one's chest. Well, as I've stated before "胸" = heart and I'm not discussing it :p. However, there was some further confusion over exactly what meaning was supposed to be applied to "ささげましょう" and "宿る" as both can mean a few things. To figure out the first, I decided to attack the second. "宿る" was originally translated to mean "birth" and while it can be taken to mean that, a more direct translation means "dwelling within", with "に" indirectly associating it with "heart". However, this word was also modifying "ひかり" (light), which means that the entire phrase "dwelling within the heart" is modifying "light". Because of this, the focus of the sentence is the "light". This revealation led to choosing the definition of "to raise up" over "to dedicate" for the word "ささげましょう" as "to raise up" fits more with the theme of light than dedication. These are young women, not paladins XP.

Third line was thought to be "...Hope that becomes the stars; I can see into tomorrow." and I only made minor changes to it. Hope became "aspirations" because the definition fit better with the theme of the series. The word means "hopes, aspirations, dreams, etc..." not to have hope. Aspirations was less corny than dreams, so I chose it for elegance and flow :P "I can see into tomorrow" was changed to "I can see tomorrow" because that's literally what it says. I don't see "into" in there, nor any reason to assume that it was implied.

EDIT:
Fourth Line: Did I mention the original Static Sub for this line was right? >>;; I just reworded it a bit based on Ando's suggestions. Thanks hon. :)

Fourth line. This one was highly dependant on two things, first was my feeling of warning being intended here and second on the word Arika never gets to sing because of Sergey's interruption. "Oh my beloved, wait for me..." was the original, Static Subs translation which I humbly disagree with and think it was mostly an error based on not having the final lyric of this stanza. If the line ended where Arika stopped singing, then that is what the translation would be. However there is a final word, "ておくれ". The first half of the sentence translates directly to "oh beloved" and the second half to "wait be too late". The word "ておくれ" means, literally, to be too late, as if you have missed something, etc... It's really forboding. Now, the only thing between the word for "wait" and the word for "to be too late" that connects them in any sort of manner, let alone cause and affect is the form "wait" is in. This is called the "て-form" and is used to string together verbs. For example, you'd use this form to say "I ran, walked, and biked" so it's like adding "and" between verbs. Now, in ENGLISH the phrase "wait and be too late" is a direct cause and affect: you waited and are therefore too late. In Japanese and specifically in this poem, the "て-form" usage indicates a much subtler connection between waiting and being too late. Essentially, it boils down to the same thing either way, but I thought the subtly of the phrasing was worth mentioning.


NINA'S STANZA
First line here was originally "That destined face stands next to the window in my heart." and the only real change I made to it was changing "face" to "profile". While the word "face" is part of ”横顔” it is not the whole word. In it's entirety, the word means "the face as seen from the side" or, more concisely, one's profile. Therefore, a word change for clearification. Plus, I think it helps with the visualization intended in this scene. This stanza is, as I said, like seeing a vision, so it's important to get these details right.

Second line which was initially translated to "Let's light up my dream; my twinkling dream;" gave me a whole bunch of :twitch: when I looked at the original lyrics. Absolutely no where in there a reference to "twinkling" or is dream referenced twice. So, uh, yeah... the heck? XD Not only that, but the dream itself is not the main subject of the line. Dream is a modifier of light. (Just like "dwelling in our hearts" modified "light" in Arika's stanza... pattern? Yes indeedy). So the subject of the line, to start with is "the light of our dreams" not simply one's dreams. For further specification, the word "守る" is applied to "dream". Now, to be clear, "dream" is a noun here and certainly not a verb. "守る" is a verb applied to the noun "dream". Usually, "守る" is translated to "protect", but that is not the entire meaning. You see, it also means "obey" and thus has somewhat of a combined or double meaning. It gives off the feeling of duty, which is really more of what it's referencing: protecting as if it's one's duty to do so. However, while this concept works well in Japanese and can easilly be applied to a dream, the same application simply cannot work in English and achieve the same meaning, so I had to change the verb slightly from its "protect" meaning to its "obey" definition. "obeyed dreams" makes a lot more sense in English and in context than "guarded dreams" mostly due to the problem of "illuminating the light of" said dreams. A guarded dream is not an accomplished one, whereas an obeyed one is or, at the very least, is one in the process of becoming true. That is a dream's light which can be illuminated. Oh, and the word "ともしましょう" means "to light" but having "light" twice would be repetative so I swapped it out for a synonym which means exactly the same thing but sounds better in English.

The third line, "The star tells me to choose just one person" was changed only slightly in my translation because no where does it specifically imply or state "person". In fact, it makes much more sense to apply choosing only one [thing] to dreams and aspirations vs. a love rather than between people.

"Oh, when my beloved person calls me name, I'll know its them" is another translation of "er... did I miss something?" :uhoh: After looking over the sentence, though, I realized I didn't miss something, but am still confused as to where the translation came from. First of all, there is no "oh" but I understand that this may have been added to agree better with Arika's stanza. This is personal interprettation, and while I don't think it's needed, I can understand it's use so I'm not going to debate it. "When" here, it should be mentioned, is more of an "if and only if" in the way the Japanese is written. Thus, "when" is applicable in the English translation, but I feel the subtlies are worth mentioning in translations, especially that of poetry. Also "I'll know its them" is absolutely no where in that line. What I assume to be the phrase that was translated to that is "わたしを -- 変わる", where the first word is "I" and it is directly related to the verb meaning "to change" or "will change". I reworded "change" to "transform" because it's a synonym that fits the series and feeling of the piece better. The hardest part about this line is finding which subject relates to which verb because, in Japanese, you can put anything anywhere in the sentence. -_-; To give you some idea, it goes [Loved person() I() if called will change]. This, in all honesty, can lead to quite a bit of confusion, but the particles "()" are the godsend of the Japanese language and help end this confusion, so I can assure you that the "loved person" "calls out" and "I" "will transform", and not the other way around. :cool:


MASHIROU'S STANZA
THIS HAS BEEN EDITTED THANKS TO ANDO'S POINTS BELOW
First of: "These precious times, this untainted light." <--- OMGWTFBBQ? :confused: The only word from this translation that I found in the original Japanese was "untainted" and even then, it's hard to get to that. The first half of the sentence is literally . Yes, it's "adjective, verb, verb" with nothing inbetween the verbs. It's like saying "Beautifully smile, explode" there's nothing to join "smile" and "explode" just like there is nothing joining "stand" and "dance". Not even the aforementioned "て-form". There is no connection between "stand" and "dance" AT ALL. They could be two different sentences for all grammer cares. However, one must remember that this is poetry, and more specifically Japanese poetry, which means that grammer is often and gratiously ommitted. For this reason, it is my personal interpretation that "beautifully" was supposed to modify both verbs. Think of it like math and the foil method. 2(x + y) = 2x + 2y. Here, it's Beautifully ( Stand + Dance) = Beautifully Stand + Beautifully Danced. When simplified in English that's "Beautifully stand and dance".

(Still on first line) Now, in keeping with the null connection between "stand" and "dance", the first half of the sentence seems to, grammatically have nothing whatsoever to do with the second half of the sentence. --; The second half translates very roughly to "untainted wings". First of all, "wings" here can also, and more precisely be translated to "feathers" which the word in question is more apt to mean. So the literal translation of "羽" is actually "feathers" and to a much lesser extent "wings". However, the term "feathers" in relation to the rest of the stanza and the whole poem was simply too small to make enough sense (at least in English), so I pulled artistic license and used the lesser used meaning of "wings". Now, "羽" does literally mean both "feathers" and "wings" but is mostly used to mean "feathers" which I why I mention it. As for "けがれなき" ... which is like so much BLARG to translate... "けがれなき" literally means "impure (weeping/lament/deceased)" but then, because of the form it's written in, sort of negates itself to become "not - impure (weeping/lament/deceased)". So, uh, yeah, "untainted", but in a subtle, vague and convoluted manner.

Edit: It has been pointed out that this song is supposed to be a lullaby, and for this reason, it's likely that the person singing it (Rena) is referring to themselves as the "untainted feather/wing". Considering that ando's Japanese is better than mine and that this fits very well with the theme of an otome, I believe the assertation to be correct. This was the most drastic change to the song, as it makes everything that appears after it a way of addressing themselves in the third person. The English equivalent is something like Rena saying "Aunty Rena's going to take good care of you~" -_-;; That's the best example I can give without getting overly complicated, so I apologise.:heh:

Second line. "Let's examine your hands and eyes for the radiance of life." <-- :eyespin: These translations are starting to really make me crazy XP There is simply none of this translation in the original Japanese. To make this simple, pretend you didn't just read that line and I'll explain my translation. The most troublesome word in this line is "御子" or "miko" which is a word you've all often heard before, I'm guessing. It's usually translated to "priestess." Why did I translate it to something else entirely? Well, because they changed the kanji on us! The bastards! >.< With that kanji combination, "miko" means either "the child of the emperor" or "maiden concecrated to the gods" which is sort of like priestess but not to any full degree. I chose the first translation for a few reasons: 1) it was the most literal and used translation for the given kanji 2) Mashirou is singing this part 3) it fits better with the series. (That is, if this was Mai HiME, I probably would have used the second translation). Now, this isn't even the subject of the sentence. "Miko" is modifying the word for "life" (as in your mortal life) which is intern modifying "light". (Again light is the main subject of the second line in a stanza! Do note this!). The full subject is then "the light of the life of the emperor's child"! Lastly, the first word's literal translation is "to carry on one's back and shoulders"/ "to be burdened on one's back and shoulders" [which is modified to "let's ~"]. EDIT: This is no longer true, if one takes into account that the assumed subject of the line is "I" or the person singing (IE: an otome or specifically Rena). Thus, the actual modification is "I will" not "let's". In other words, she's stating that she intends to carry the light of the emperor's child on her back, IE: guard and protect them. This actually makes a lot more sense.

So why did I put "light of" in parenthesises? Well, because the sentence would sound better as "let's carry the life of the emperor's child on our backs" in English, but I wanted to preserve the pattern previously established, thus left it in as an aside. Conversely, it could also be "Let us burden ourselves with the light of the light of the emperor's child", but that would give the line a negative conotation and the stanza reads like someone who is striving forward, so it needs to be positive.

In the third line, the first half "In order to become stars," is one which I agree with, but wanted to change the wording slightly to "for the sake of becoming stars" because doing something in order to do something else is simply not as grand as doing something for the sake of something else. We need grandeur here because the last sentence was equally grand and speaking of royalty and burdens borne. However, the next part of the translation really confused me "We are born and educated" does not match the Japanese here. :eyebrow: Only the verb "to be born" is the same, but no where is education mentioned.

I will mention here that this is my weakest translation because, frankly, I'm not familiar with the grammatical structure used to modify "to be born," so if someone does and wants to correct my interprettation please feel free to do so. That aside, the modification looks to be adding the meaning of "must". So, "we must be born for the sake of becoming stars." Rather uplifting, ne?

EDIT: Someone took me up on my request for a correction (thanks ando! :eyespin:) and pointed out that the verb form here is actually "must NOT" not "must". Obviously, this changes the sentence completely. Honestly, I'm not sure what to make of it anymore. "In order to become a star, I must not be born." ??? Honestly, I have no clue, but I'm trusting ando's translation here, as they provided me with the grammer point and everything. Anyone who wants to take a crack at this, please do.

And lastly, we have "We go to sleep held by our loved ones" which I changed slightly to "Sleep, embraced by our loved ones". A few reasons for this. First is flow, second is that "embraced" is the more typical translation for "抱かれて" and third because it just sounds better. :heh: Also, "sleep" is in command form (I kind of missed this originally) so the whole sentence is sort of like a gentle command. It is a lullaby, afterall.


[B]CONCLUSION
Overall, my impression with this poem is that it is as important as Arisa's song from Mai HiME. Additionally, there are many patterns in particular that should be looked into.

First, there is the fact that there are literally three different parts to the story outlined here: a warning, a vision and a prophecy of sorts. This gives the piece a rather eerie feeling. Is the vision of the past, present, future or all of the above? Is the prophecy which is written so positively one that has already happened, is currently happening, or doomed to failure in the Mai Otome world? And, of course, what is the warning alluding to? This is, perhaps, the most chilling and forboding question of the whole piece mainly because it has both positive and negative aspects in the stanza. The lines go Negative, Positive, Positive, Negative, which gives one the impression that things will start to look up and then end badly. (Which seems to be the case with ep 13!)

Secondly, all three stanzas reference, in order, a group effort to help a light, a star and a decision in relation to a star, and a loved one. These things are integral in both the Mai HiME and Mai Otome plots. The only kicker being, this time they have different or undisclosed meanings. For example, from this I can say that the star is important, but exactly why I can't tell. Your fate is linked to the star twice and the star delivers and ultimatum: one and only one. Yet we don't know what exactly this is in reference to. Could it be choose only one loved one? Perhaps, but that seems too MH for MO. A more plausible choice seems to be choosing between the light (be it your dreams, or a group concept) and your beloved. This seems to be much more the case, since in MO, the girls are forced to choose between their dreams and their loved ones. (End of ep 12 and speculation on 13!!)

So, I hope I covered everything well enough for some discussion to start up again. ^_^ Thanks for reading this extremely long post.

- Kira

[Tremalkinger]

You don't do anything halfway, do you? ^_^

I'll read through and write something meaningful after I finish grinding out level 46 in WoW.

[Tremalkinger]

How did all three girls AND Sergey learn of the song? Arika learned it from her grandmother, and Sergey learned it from Rena. Nina has had at least some contact with Rena (see flashback from episode six pool scene). Mashiro... I have no idea. Arika's grandmother presumably found Arika soon after the incident which left her in a bobbing egg, and Rena probably didn't want to hang around for too long after watching the country she was sworn to protect be destroyed because she wanted to get preggers (assuming she survived the fight with Rad). So many questions that need to be answered.

Anyway, let us assume that the original creator of the song (be it Rena or Arika's grandmother) had some foresight into the future. That is... that the song is a form of foreshadowing for an anime Nostradamus wannabe and therefore this discussion isn't a waste of time. In that case, we can have some fun with this.

The first verse, as Kira already said, looks like a warning. Repitition of a theme (aspirations, raising up, waking), mainly making the point that all three girls need to keep following their dreams (or else... DOOM). It should be noted that ささげましょう is an invitational form, but is also used to remind or command someone (an english equivilent would be 'Let's do the laundry, shall we?').

If this is a chronological overview of the show, the first verse would be the first ten episodes or so. Arika's waking of the Blue Saphire, and her subsuquent training.

Verse two! More implications of some sort of spiritual monogamy. This whole 'beloved' theme runs through the song stronger than I realized at first. The 'Mai' francise has always thrived on this extra dimension of a relationship with tangible consiquences (Otome bond, Child bond, Slave bond), so I guess it shouldn't come as such a suprise. And the final two lines spell out the truth of who the 'beloved' is pretty clearly. "When my beloved calls out, I will transform" sounds an awful lot like an acceptance contract between Meister Otome and Royalty.

So the second verse seems to be talking about the bonding for the main characters. We've already seen Arika get bonded, but I don't think that's what this is about. My guess would be Nina getting taken soon too, since its in her verse. Nagi looks like a likely (and tragic) option.

Versue three... the conclusion. Beautifully stand and dance is just about as clear as you can get: Otome battles. The second line is talking about protecting someone important, and my guess would be Mikoto. Mikoto lead them to the Harmonium, and was all but integerated into it.

The final line almost certainly speaks of a happy ending. So rejoice, carebears, and be ready for it, all you tragety lovers.

Just my two yen.

[KiraDouji]

うるわしく立ち舞う　けがれなき羽
Beautifully stand and dance (with?) untainted wings

Actually, while I agree with the line "Beautifully stand and dance" meaning otome battles, I think there's a bit more to the line than just that. (Or maybe I've got too much Kubo Tite in my head :rolleyes: ) The point is, there's a whole other part to the line which was added for a purpose. "untainted wings" is an important part of this verse because wings are usually used to reference, for lack of better termonology, rising above a problem or overcoming great odds, or divinity. The addition of "untainted" (in all of its vague magnificence) points towards a duel meaning along the lines of "without complications" or, in otome's case "with an undivided heart." This is integral to the meaning of the line as it would not only make it positive (!) but also indicate that an important decision has been made by the combatants and they are doing whatever it is they decide on by their own decision.

背負いましょう御子の　命のひかり
Let's carry the (light of) the life of the emperor's child on our backs

To me, this line indicates directly to one of the three girls. I say this because the kanji used for "miko" was so g-damn precise that I can't see it meaning anything aside from what it directly stands for. Also, the line bursts with determination and possible triumph. I believe it strongly indicates a resolution between Arika, Mashirou and Nina for not only themselves but for one specific goal which they are all then devoted to.

星になるために　生まれてはならぬ
We must be born for the sake of becoming stars

Here, there is a huge allusion to not only the star itself (third time "hoshi" is mentioned) but also it seems much like... well a eulegy. This seems like a sort of statement to be made after a loved has passed on, but having accomplished something they dreamed of. It's really hard to relate my feelings of this statement other than saying that I think someone important to the theme and plot of this story is going to die towards the end accomplishing a dream that (most likely) many people were striving for and in doing so creates a bittersweet victory.

愛するひとに　 抱かれてねむれ
We sleep, embraced by our loved ones.

Again, there is more foreshadowing here than taken into account. Yes, it seems like a happy ending, but more specifically one which indicates the final state of things. This could herald a varity of things: that otomes in general cease to exist as they were in the beginning; that one of the main otomes focused on (Arika, Nina, ShizNat, Akane, or even Mai) ends up giving up their life as an otome; or even that in the end a balance is struck between love/sex and being an otome.

Just my personal interpretations, though. Beware the Deep Hidden Meaning(tm).
- Kira

[ando]

Some comments from me as a Japanese.

うるわしく立ち舞う　けがれなき羽
Beautifully stand and dance (with?) untainted wings

Actually, while I agree with the line "Beautifully stand and dance" meaning otome battles, I think there's a bit more to the line than just that. (Or maybe I've got too much Kubo Tite in my head :rolleyes: ) The point is, there's a whole other part to the line which was added for a purpose. "untainted wings" is an important part of this verse because wings are usually used to reference, for lack of better termonology, rising above a problem or overcoming great odds, or divinity. The addition of "untainted" (in all of its vague magnificence) points towards a duel meaning along the lines of "without complications" or, in otome's case "with an undivided heart." This is integral to the meaning of the line as it would not only make it positive (!) but also indicate that an important decision has been made by the combatants and they are doing whatever it is they decide on by their own decision.

I think that an untainted wing(Otome?) is telling the following three lines to the emperor's child. So,

背負いましょう御子の　命のひかり
Let's carry the (light of) the life of the emperor's child on our backs

To me, this line indicates directly to one of the three girls. I say this because the kanji used for "miko" was so g-damn precise that I can't see it meaning anything aside from what it directly stands for. Also, the line bursts with determination and possible triumph. I believe it strongly indicates a resolution between Arika, Mashirou and Nina for not only themselves but for one specific goal which they are all then devoted to.

"I will carry the (light of) the life of the emperor's child on my back."

This 'I' indicates an untainted wing, Otome.

星になるために　生まれてはならぬ
We must be born for the sake of becoming stars

Here, there is a huge allusion to not only the star itself (third time "hoshi" is mentioned) but also it seems much like... well a eulegy. This seems like a sort of statement to be made after a loved has passed on, but having accomplished something they dreamed of. It's really hard to relate my feelings of this statement other than saying that I think someone important to the theme and plot of this story is going to die towards the end accomplishing a dream that (most likely) many people were striving for and in doing so creates a bittersweet victory.

This line looks a negative and imperative form. So,

"Must not be born for the sake of becoming a star."

愛するひとに　 抱かれてねむれ
We sleep, embraced by our loved ones.

Again, there is more foreshadowing here than taken into account. Yes, it seems like a happy ending, but more specifically one which indicates the final state of things. This could herald a varity of things: that otomes in general cease to exist as they were in the beginning; that one of the main otomes focused on (Arika, Nina, ShizNat, Akane, or even Mai) ends up giving up their life as an otome; or even that in the end a balance is struck between love/sex and being an otome.

"Please sleep, embraced by who loves you."

Just my interpritation. Sorry for my bad English.

[KiraDouji]

Some comments from me as a Japanese.
I think that an untainted wing(Otome?) is telling the following three lines to the emperor's child.


I don't really understand what you're trying to say... um... ^^; Is it something like
Otome: "I will carry your light"
Miko: "Okay"
??

So,
"I will carry the (light of) the life of the emperor's child on my back."

This 'I' indicates an untainted wing, Otome.


I'm sorry, I don't see the "I" ... ? Is it implied? The first word is in the "Let's do [verb]" form, isn't it? :confused:


This line looks a negative and imperative form. So,

"Must not be born for the sake of becoming a star."


Must not? Really? It looks like must... Could you give me an example of what you mean? :heh:

"Please sleep, embraced by who loves you."

This is the Miko then speaking to the Otome, right? I'm just trying to follow along. This is a command?

Just my interpritation. Sorry for my bad English.

Well my Japanese isn't exactly perfect either :rolleyes: so I'd be happy just getting everything right. ^^; Am I correct assuming that the rest of the translation is okay?

- Kira

[ando]

I don't really understand what you're trying to say... um... ^^; Is it something like
Otome: "I will carry your light"
Miko: "Okay"
??

This song is a lullaby, if my memory is certain, so I think that Miko is asummed just a baby. I imagine the situation that Otome is talking "I will carry your light ..." to Miko and Miko is going to sleep in Otome's arms. Miko doesn't answer because Miko is just a baby and going to sleep.

I'm sorry, I don't see the "I" ... ? Is it implied? The first word is in the "Let's do [verb]" form, isn't it? :confused:

I think that the subject of this part of the song is an untainted wing(Otome), so the following part is something like that:

Otome talks to Miko, "背負いましょう御子の　命のひかり".
Otome talks to Miko, "星になるために　生まれてはならぬ".
Otome talks to Miko, "愛するひとに　 抱かれてねむれ".

That is the reason I make up for 'I'. So the second line would be:

(私が)背負いましょう御子の　命のひかり

"私が...しましょう" can be translated into "I will do ...".

Must not? Really? It looks like must... Could you give me an example of what you mean? :heh:

Pay attantion to "ぬ".

From 大辞泉(Japanese dictionary):
http://dic.yahoo.co.jp/bin/dsearch?index=14184600&p=%A4%CC&dname=0na&dtype=0&stype=1&pagenum=1

-----
ぬ

[助動][〇｜ず（ん）｜ぬ（ん）｜ぬ（ん）｜ね｜〇]《文語の打消しの助動詞「ず」の連体形が口語の終止形となったもの》助動詞「だ」「たい」を除く活用語の未 然形に付く。

１ 打消しの意を表す。「まかぬ種は生えぬ」「思わず叫ぶ」「勉強をしない生徒がよい成績をとれるはずがありま せん」

２ （「てはいかん」「てはならぬ（ん）」の形で）禁止の意を表す。「高山植物を採ってはいかん」

３ （「ねばならぬ（ん）」「ねばなるまい」の形で）当然・義務の意を表す。「明日は会社に八時までに行かねば ならぬ」

４ （「ずともよい」「ぬともよい」「んでもいい」の形で）許容・許可の意を表す。「君は行かずともよい」「風 邪をひいているから風呂はわかさんでもいい」

５ （文末にあって「ん」「ぬ（ん）か」の形で）催促・勧誘・依頼の意を表す。「早く起きんか」「あなたも体操 をなさいませんか」

「三谷さんに一服さしあげて下さいません？」〈康成・千羽鶴〉
-----

So "ぬ" means prohibition in this case and I used "Must not ...".
Some examples:

ここで遊んではならぬ。(Must not play here.)
ここで煙草を吸ってはならぬ。(Must not smoke here.)
生き物を殺してはならぬ。(Must not kill a living thing.)

This is the Miko then speaking to the Otome, right? I'm just trying to follow along. This is a command?

I think that the subject is Otome and Otome is speaking to Miko.

"ねむれ" is a command form of "ねむる".

Well my Japanese isn't exactly perfect either :rolleyes: so I'd be happy just getting everything right. ^^; Am I correct assuming that the rest of the translation is okay?

I hope this helps you. There are some points I pay attention in the rest the translation, but I will write another post later.

[KiraDouji]

Well, it's really hard to understand a new grammer concept when written in the same language of said grammer concept... O_o;;; That aside, I think I get what you're talking about, which would then completely change the meaning of the sentence. I'll go back and correct that.

The concept that this was a lullaby was kind of forgotten, I think. At least by me. ^^;

I think that the subject of this part of the song is an untainted wing(Otome), so the following part is something like that:

Otome talks to Miko, "背負いましょう御子の　命のひかり".
Otome talks to Miko, "星になるために　生まれてはならぬ".
Otome talks to Miko, "愛するひとに　 抱かれてねむれ".

That is the reason I make up for 'I'. So the second line would be:

(私が)背負いましょう御子の　命のひかり

"私が...しましょう" can be translated into "I will do ...".

And this is a perfect example of why translating the meaning of a poem from another language is really hard. I never would have thought of the song in that manner. Does this mean that the other "~しましょう" should be "I will ~" instead of "let's ~" as well? The concept of the lullaby works pretty well when applied to the first stanza, and a little less well to the second, but I can see how it affects the meanings of each line.

Of course, this brings up the point of "if this was an otome->miko lullaby, why do all three girls know it?"

I'm going to head back up and correct what I can, and hope it makes a bit more sense. Thanks for the help.

- Kira

[ando]

Does this mean that the other "~しましょう" should be "I will ~" instead of "let's ~" as well?

I think it's a delicate point. "~しましょう" implies the subject's intention. So, if the subject is singular, it can be translated "I will ~". If the subject is plural, it can be translated "let's ~" or "We will ~". The characters in the third stanza are Otome and Miko, and taking into acount that this song is a lullaby I assume Miko is just a baby, so I think that the subject is Otome and used "I will ~". In the first stanza, the subject is unclear, so we could have various interpritation. I have no idea whether it should be translated into "I will ~" or "let's ~". In the second stanza, the characters are the destined profile, my beloved and 'I'. I think both "I will ~" and "let's ~" make sense. It would be a matter of interpretation.

The more I think, the more complicated.

And another point.

愛するひとよ　待ってておくれ
Oh beloved, wait and be too late

"~しておくれ" equals "~してくれ" in this case. "~してくれ" means a request. For example,

窓を締めて(お)くれ("Please close the window.")
新聞をとって来て(お)くれ("Please take the newspaper.")
荷物を運んで(お)くれ("Please carry the luggage.")

So it can be translated into "Oh beloved, Please be waiting."

Of course, this brings up the point of "if this was an otome->miko lullaby, why do all three girls know it?"

That point is a big problem in My-Otome.

[KiraDouji]

The more I think, the more complicated.


That's what I thought when I first tried to translate this song >.<


And another point.

"~しておくれ" equals "~してくれ" in this case. "~してくれ" means a request. For example,

窓を締めて(お)くれ("Please close the window.")
新聞をとって来て(お)くれ("Please take the newspaper.")
荷物を運んで(お)くれ("Please carry the luggage.")

So it can be translated into "Oh beloved, Please be waiting."


Arg! Someone throw me some kanji please! Really, I've never heard something like "窓を締めて(お)くれ" just with the "~してくれ" part. -_-; Well, expanding my Japanese vocabularly for the win. XD I assumed it was a separate word due to my ignorance of being able to use "お" with "くれ" like that. Ah well, something else to edit ^^;


That point is a big problem in My-Otome.

I expect revisions to come after we find out more from the series.

Thanks for your help! :)

- Kira

[ZippyDSM]

Question,are they changeign the ending theme like Negima did had all the girl VAs sing it? I tohught I aherd a pitch change in ep 12...altho I miht be deaf *L*

[djmaca]

Could someome write the whole lyrics of the song? It's been three months and I can't seem to find a site that has one and I'm really dissapointed.

[darkwing]

Could someome write the whole lyrics of the song? It's been three months and I can't seem to find a site that has one and I'm really dissapointed.
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost.php?p=422619&postcount=14

[djmaca]

Right. Got your piont.

How about the untranslated one...

[darkwing]

How about the untranslated one...
It's in the same thread...
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost.php?p=409304&postcount=3

[Mich666]

I found complete lyrics of Otome wa DO MY BEST desho, so here it is ~_^ (Hopefully we will have Crystal Energy here soon ^_^)

(Performed by Kikuchi Mika & Koshimizu Ami)

勇気が願いかなえるのよ
DO YOUR BEST?
負けないように進みましょう

始まったよ
わたしだけを待つ物語がいま
逃げ出すより立ち向かえばいいね
それが乙女の勇気

がんばってるよ
胸がきゅんと淋しくなる時も笑顔で

NO,NO,NOはない！
かならずあなたの世界の中に
楽しい未来がある 守ってあげたいの
だいじょうぶよ
キレイな想い 宝石よりも光る
誇りを持って進みましょう

恐れないで
自分の弱さにもきっと意味がある
苦手がだった無邪気さとか… そう
変わる乙女もいいね

話すのがイヤだと背中向けた時も
ぬくもりくれた

DO DO DO MY BESTで
いつも心駆けてきたけど
たまには深呼吸でだいじな人のこと 考えて
ちいさな願い そっと語ってみましょうか
ずっとあなたの側にいたい

NO,NO,NOはない！
あなたもわたしも世界の中で
DO DO DO MY BESTの
本気を出してきらめいているから
すべての想い 宝石よりも光る
誇りを持って進みましょう
負けないように進みましょう


yuuki ga negai kanaeru no yo
DO YOUR BEST?
makenai you ni susumimashou

hajimatta yo
watashi dake wo matsu monogatari ga ima
nigedasu yori tachi mukaeba ii ne
sore ga otome no yuuki

ganbatteru yo
mune ga kyun to samishiku naru toki mo egao de

NO, NO, NO ha nai!
kanarazu anata no sekai no naka ni
tanoshii mirai ga aru mamotte agetai no
daijyoubu yo
kirei na omoi houseki yori mo hikaru
hokori wo motte susumimashou

osorenaide
jibun no yowasa nimo kitto imi ga aru
nigate ga datta mujyaki satoka ... sou
kawaru otome mo ii ne

hanasu no ga iya dato senaka muketa toki mo
nukumori kureta

DO DO DO MY BEST de
itsumo kokoro kaketeki take do
tamani wa shinkokyuu de daiji na hito no koto kangaete
chiisana negai sotto katatte mimashouka
zutto anata no soba ni itai

NO, NO, NO ha nai!
anata mo watashi mo sekai no naka de
DO DO DO MY BEST no
honki wo dashite kirameite irukara
subete no omoi houseki yori mo hikaru
hokori wo motte susumimashou
makenai you ni susumimashou

[djmaca]

Originally posted by paTKany
___________________________________________

I can't translate it, but i can type it:

目覚めを待つ国の　むかしのはなし
ささげましょう胸に　宿るひかり
星になるきぼう　あしたが見える
愛するひとよ　待ってておくれ

こころの窓に立つ　さだめの横顔
ともしましょう夢を　守るひかり
星はただひとり　選べと告げる
愛するひとが　わたしを呼べば変わる

うるわしく立ち舞う　けがれなき羽
背負いましょう御子の　命のひかり
星になるために　生まれてはならぬ
愛するひとに　 抱かれてねむれ

mezame wo matsu kuni no mukashi no hanashi
sasagemashou mune ni yadoru hikari
hoshi ni naru kibou ashita ga mieru
ai suru hito yo mattete okure

kokoro no mado ni tatsu sadame no yokogao
tomoshimashou yume wo mamoru hikari
hoshi wa tada hitori erabe to tsugeru
ai suru hito ga watashi wo yobeba kawaru

uruwashiku tachi mau kegarenaki hane
seoimashou miko no inochi no hikari
hoshi ni naru tame ni umarete wa naranu
ai suru hito ni idakarete nemure

Ive'd been looking for that....
Thanks!:heh:

[Rev05]

Couple of questions...possible spoilers


If the first verse is the queen, and the second is the otome, what's the third verse? The unborn child of the emperor?

Also, in episode 16, Erstin knows the song also...this kind of throws everything out of whack. Although, earlier they showed an otome receiving a black letter. The obvious choice would be Tomoe, but it's kind of too obvious. If Ers-chan knows the song because she works for the enemy, things would make sense again.

[Eclipze]

Couple of questions...possible spoilers


Also, in episode 16, Erstin knows the song also...this kind of throws everything out of whack
Um, Erstin said herself that she learned the song from Arika, and that she remembered it well because it was a beautiful song and Arika sang it to her while she cried in episode 9(Field trip).

I really dont know how people can miss that...

[Rev05]

Except for the fact that Erstin says herself that "It's so unbelieveable. We know different stanzas to the same song" and Arika comments on how it seems like fate. Unless of course the translation is completely off on this part.

[Eclipze]

I'll wait till I've seen the subs for 16 before commenting, unless you named the episode wrongly.

[KiraDouji]

Except for the fact that Erstin says herself that "It's so unbelieveable. We know different stanzas to the same song" and Arika comments on how it seems like fate. Unless of course the translation is completely off on this part.

No, she's referring to the fact that Arika and Nina know different verses of the same song. The "we" in there is her placing herself vaguely in the combination of Nina and Arika. She states as fact that she learned the song from Arika.

- Kira

[PastPrime]

No, she's referring to the fact that Arika and Nina know different verses of the same song. The "we" in there is her placing herself vaguely in the combination of Nina and Arika. She states as fact that she learned the song from Arika.

- Kira
Arika and Nina now know that the other knows different verses of the song. I wonder how long it will be before one of them hears Mashiro sing her verse or she hears one of them.

[Mich666]

Arika and Nina now know that the other knows different verses of the song. I wonder how long it will be before one of them hears Mashiro sing her verse or she hears one of them.
I think that Arika will hear it from Mashiro but now the war has started I can't imagine Mashiro singing something...

This ep we heard the main song again... in different situation.. I started to think about the translation again and I realized that the first verse is singed by Queen, second by her Otome but third verse still I don't know...

Also, I found a different translation of this song... (which may or may not be correct...)

verse 1: Arika

It is an old tale of a kingdom wating to be awakened
within this devoted chest dwells a light,
this hope becomes a star, and I see the future
oh my beloved, plase wait for me

verse 2: Nina

I erect a profile of destiny at the window of my heart
there is only one that the star chooses and ordains
whose enligthened dreams is proteced by her light
my beloved, you have grown distant from me

verse 3: Mashiro

untainted feathers dancing beautifully
the burdened noble child's light of life,
is to become the star -- she must stay unborned
on her beloved, she sleeps in deep embrace

It is implying that if one of them become star something evil will happen? Maybe the whole song is about becoming star....

[KiraDouji]

The third verse is assumed to be the otome talking to the princess, like a lullaby.

That's an interesting translation, though, where'd you get? Is there an explanation with it? The thing is, in the first and second verse have a very nebulous narrative voice, and such certain lines (the first, for example) could easilly be translated both in the way I provided and in the way you have found, depending on the subject of each verse. If you found this on a Japanese site, or by someone who's done translations pretty frequently, I'd be willing to believe their choice of subjects, as my translation is the best I can do without knowing the subjects of stanzas 1 and 2.

- Kira

[Mich666]

The third verse is assumed to be the otome talking to the princess, like a lullaby.

That's an interesting translation, though, where'd you get? Is there an explanation with it? The thing is, in the first and second verse have a very nebulous narrative voice, and such certain lines (the first, for example) could easilly be translated both in the way I provided and in the way you have found, depending on the subject of each verse. If you found this on a Japanese site, or by someone who's done translations pretty frequently, I'd be willing to believe their choice of subjects, as my translation is the best I can do without knowing the subjects of stanzas 1 and 2.

- Kira
I found it here - in discussion under episode 7 review ;) But no explanation there...
http://www.designchronicle.com/memento/archives/mai_otome_ep7.html

[KiraDouji]

Dang, I was hoping for an explanation.

- Kira

[Pacilia]

Hi, I was reading through your discussion and I jsut thought that I might chip in a little of my opinion. If you don't understand me, it's ok. You can jsut ignore this.


Arika's part sounds like it's toward Mashiro, with her becoming queen, or to the otomes, who are studying over at Windbloom (where Gauderoube is). Windbloom seems to be the resting place for all the dead Otomes, therefore a country of legned. Raising up the light in our heart, it sounds like they're talking about the Gem. You know when they materialize the gem glows? *shrug* The star can be the the blue one by the moon. Sergey said that legend has it that the blue star will guide the people. OR It's the legendary gems, like the Graceful Amethyst or Fire string Ruby etc, because everyone wants to be Meister. The beloved thing, I agree, probably has soemthing to do with the masters/slave/whatever. I came to this conclusion is because it is Arika who sang this and it was the first one the three parts that we have heard on the show. Arika, by then, just really wanted to be a very good Otome. Therefore, this part sounds as if being an otome was a very good thing.

This, because it is Nina who sings this, sends out the darker side of being an Otome. The destined profile, IMO, is like the face of the master. Standing at the widnow of my heart sounds like this person is the only one an Otome can think about. Referring back to Natsuki's speech in ep 13 during Akane's meister ceremony, the vow sounds like you can only have your master in your heart. This represents the conflict of being with the one you love and your master like Akane and Mai. The star, beign the gem, tells the otome to pick only one person to become your master. This in a way also represents Nina, except that she has her father's face in her heart, and Sergey tells Nina to become Nagi's Otome. When my beloved calls, I will transform, is the contract. The masters says "With my name, let thy power come forth" to release the power so that the otome can transform. This part reminds me of ep 17, when Nina and Nagi establishes a contract through the ultimate Black Diamond.

Mashiro's part somehow reminded me of Rena. With what you have said before, the wings being the otome (Rena), and the whole meperor's child is like Arika. In order to become a star, in a way it feels like to become something in heaven to watch over someone else. Therefore, Rena cannot be reborn because she needs to watch over Arika. It somehow feels like Rena wanted to protect the child, Arika, so gave her the Blue Sky sapphire. Refering to the first ep, Rena took once last look at baby Arika and whispered "Please live on". The last line, my guess is either it was Rena's wish for Arika to be happy, or to all the otomes maybe?

[Mich666]

Pacilia: Good explanation, some ideas may be definetly true :)

It just have crossed my mind that "In order to become a star" could have something to do with green-sparkling... but I'm not too sure about it...
Given that we are nearing the end of the show and we still have no understanding of the song (in Mai-HiME we already knew it after ep17 I think), it will be probable something ultimate to the story - about destinies and dreams of Otomes and somehow about Harmonium also...

[Mich666]

So forth stanza now, how unexpectable ^_^

Horobi ni tatsu kuni no monogatari ga owaru
Chikaimashou muni no negai no hikari
Hoshi ga nagarekite umarekawaru toki
Ai suru tame ni watashi mo owarete nemure

Story of the country standing amidst destruction is at an end
Let us make an umatched pledge, on the light of this wish
The star drifts towards the time of rebirth
For the sake of my love I, too, stop and sleep...

[Cannonxiao]

so nice, i love these songs!

[TomK]

Hello guys, even tho this is my first post, I've been reading posts since some times but I felt I had to interfer.

I would like to give some advices/clues to the translation as I see terrible mistakes.

I dont mean I am somehow better at Japanese than you all but I think I can help you guys with some words/sentences.

First : the line that made my JUMP on my chair and made me register :

うるわしく立ち舞う, third stanza

Even tho Kira looks very dedicated to his translation, I'm stunned he dont know about this. Here is what he wrote :
Yes, it's "adjective, verb, verb" with nothing inbetween the verbs [...] There is no connection between "stand" and "dance" AT ALL. They could be two different sentences for all grammer cares. [...]

When I read that I am like "OMFG WTF ?!?!?!?". Seriously, you never heard of "combinated verbs ?? Those two verbs ARE LINKED.

Combinated verb building : れんよう form of 1st verb + any form of 2nd verb

example : 走り続く. (hashiri tsuzuku) as in : "to continue running"
example : 食べ始める (tabe hajimeru) as in : "to start eating"

Im not english nor american so I may make mistakes in the explanation but thats whats its all about : combinated verbs.

In the stanza, "立ち舞う" OBVIOUSLY MEANS "to dance while standing" or whatever better verb a true english-speaking fellow can find. I would stay it just means "to dance"

second half of the sentence made me jump again. I really cant believe you dont know that too, as its really the BASICS of japanese grammar.

here is what you wrote :
the first half of the sentence seems to, grammatically have nothing whatsoever to do with the second half[...]

Ever heard of noun-group or whatever they are called in english ? Thats when a "sentence" (as in a group of words) is used to qualify a noun.

example :" 私が探してる"場所 (watashi ga sagashiteru basho) as in : The place (that) "I am searching" (for)
example :" 誰にも負けない"刀 (darenimo makenai katana) as in : The sword (that) "dont lose to anyone"

building : [expression in plain form] + noun

now in the stanza : うるわしく立ち舞う　けがれなき羽

lets get rid of all those adj and stuff : " 立ち舞う[...]羽 "OBVIOUSLY means "dancing wings" ( I agree with using "wings") I know that "dancing" here means we lose the "standing" meaning, but thats not the matter here.

Cant you see the sentence means that the "wings" are "dancing" ??

Now, けがれなき clearly means "untainted" its a verb "けがれる", used with negation "けがれない", then used as adj. : "けがれなき"
To me, the 3rd stanza's 1st line means "Untainted wings dancing beautifully" which got WAY MORE sense that the stuff you came with, considering the "wings" the Otome got, and their fight being called "dance" (舞)
Only thing left is to find a better verb than "dancing" if you want to keep the "standing" meaning, but I dont think its necessary as "立ち舞う" simply means "dancing" in japanese.

The same mistakes are indeed repeated in your translation. Another example :
1st stanza, 1st line : "目覚めを待つ国の昔の話"

[ 目覚めを待つ ] + 国 ... The expression in brackets is in plain form and qualifying the noun 国 as in "Country waiting to be awaken" or whatever...

昔の話 : 昔 is used as an adj. OBVIOUSLY. Some adj. come with the particle の (example : みどり　の　ねこ : a green cat)

国の昔の話 : "country's old story" ( can use "of ancient times" instead of "old" )

So the line's translation should be something like "The old story of a country waiting to be awaken".
There is NO WAY the verb "待つ" is directed to the song's listener. 目覚めを待つ CLEARLY means "waiting the awakening"

REMEMBER : SEE THE SENTENCE AS A WHOLE

There are many other mistakes but I got no time to make a full-scale pinpoint translation as I somehow suck at english.

Once again, no offense, I just want to help you improve. Those are terrible mistakes that I had to tell you about.

Any further questions. tell me and I'll gladly help.

[justMartin]

your translation do make more sence, where are you from Tomk?

It would be nice if you can do the rest of the song too

[TomK]

Well im french and already spent a lot of time doing a french translation of this song.

I dont really feel like doing it all over from scratches again, sorry

But if anyone have grammar troubles, I can help.

[justMartin]

How many year have you learned japanese? Is it hard? because i'm thinking of giving it a try.

sorry for asking so many question...

[TomK]

I've been studying japanese for 3 years, went working in japan for some time, came back france, now working as translator :)

japanese is really easy if you get you spirit into it. To me its sometimes much more simple than english :)

a sage said "You better ask a question and look like a fool for 5 minutes than never ask and stay a fool forever" so your questions are welcome :)

[justMartin]

ok, well then...

so japanese is made up of kanji (the chinese words), katakana (their version of english) and hiragana. so how do you when to use what?

and do you think i have more advantage in learning japanese for being chinese? or would it just make it more confusing for me?

[TomK]

if you're chinese you'll have a tremendous advantage ^^

it could be a bit confusing cuz you'll be tempted to read the kanji the chinese way but
most of the time you'll be able to understand the kanji since you know it already :)