[Demongod86]

PETER MARSHALL : " What are 'Do it' 'I can help ' and 'Can't get enough? "
GEORGE GOBEL : "I don't know , but it's coming from the next apartment."

PETER MARSHALL : " If you find someone lying unconscious in the street , what should you do ? "
GEORGE GOBEL : " I would probably crawl around him , I guess. "

PETER MARSHALL : "True or false : A pea can last as long as 5,000 years. "
GEORGE GOBEL : " It can sure seem that way sometimes . "

PETER MARSHALL : "True or false : Experts say there are only seven or eight things in the world dumber than an ant . "
GEORGE GOBEL : " And I think I voted for six of them . "

PETER MARSHALL : " While visiting China , you tour guide starts shouting ' Poo ! Poo ! Poo ! What does it mean ? "
GEORGE GOBEL : "Cattle crossing . "

PETER MARSHALL : "Back in the old days , when great Grandpa would put a horseradish on his head , what was he trying to do ? "
GEORGE GOBEL : " Get it in his mouth . "

PETER MARSHALL : " According to Cosmo magazine , if you meet a stranger at a party and think he's attractive , is it ok to come out directly and ask him if he's married ? "
ROSE-MARIE : " No, wait until morning . "

PETER MARSHALL : " In bowling , what's a perfect score ? "
ROSE MARIE : " Ralph, the pin boy . "

PETER MARSHALL : " During a tornado , are you safer in the bedroom or the closet ? "
ROSE MARIE : " Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safer in the bedroom . "

PETER MARSHALL : " As we grow older , do we tend to gesture more or less with our hands when we talk ? "
ROSE-MARIE : " You ask me one more 'growing older' question Peter, and I will give you a gesture you will never forget. "

PETER MARSHALL : " Jimmy Stewart did it over twenty years ago when he was forty one years old . Now he says it was one of the best things he ever did , What was it ? "
MARTY ALLEN : " Rhonda Fleming .. "

PETER MARSHALL : " Can boys join the Campfire Girls ? "
MARTY ALLEN : " Only after lights out . "

PETER MARSHALL : " You are having trouble falling asleep .. Are you a man or a woman ? "
DON KNOTTS : " That's what's been keeping me awake . "

PETER MARSHALL : " In Hawaiian , does it take more than three words to say ' I love you ? "
VINCENT PRICE : " No , you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty . "

PETER MARSHALL : " Your baby has a certain object he loves to cling to . Should you try to break him of the habit ?
JOAN RIVERS : " Yes , it's Daddy's turn . "

PETER MARSHALL : " According to the Institute of Motivational Research , a wife should beware if another woman takes interest in a certain item of her husband's clothing . What item ? "
ED ASNER : " Shorts immediately spring to mind . "