Quote:
Originally Posted by Lost Cause
Dress nice for the occasion, no ya don't hafta wear a suit (that comes later) but wear your best jeans and a nice shirt.
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I'm reminded of the Scrubs episode where the Janitor scared Elliot away by wearing a suit for a casual coffee.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ledgem
If she's not charmed by you (as you are naturally, as opposed to a forced act) then the relationship's lasting potential would likely be weak; if you don't really like what you discover then you don't need to run away from her right then and there, but certainly respect your feelings and inclinations. This is about your happiness, too.
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I'll support this by saying that all of my attempts to impress my current girlfriend early on by telling lies or stretching the truth ended up backfiring pretty badly. The lies/inflated truths themselves she was unimpressed with anyway, and then to top it off I then had to carry on being consistent for a while before willing up the courage to tell the truth. I had literally put myself in worse standing in her eyes without factually being there. Not counting all the truths she already shaked her head at, I didn't need more.
As it turns out both of us had told small lies to impress each other, and she could understand. And since there was still nothing forced about our personalities it ended up not being damaging, but it' easy to see how it would have been. I didn't intend for to go as far as it did, but being false in how you project yourself even in a small way does always catch up to you, and you don't want to get in a position where you're in a relationship, finally at the stage where the other person likes you a lot, and worrying what she will think once she finds out you lied to her early on.
Just an anecdote, not addressing Kaijo here since he never implied one should force an act, just that they should be a passive version of themselves and reflect the topic back to the other person as often as possible. Which Ledgem already replied to.
