[dniv]

Originally Posted by Fireminer

Just recently got into Go-Toubun. It is good. However, thinking about Fuutarou makes me want to ask this question:

Why in (probably) the majority of Harem series, to the girls the man is equal to not only the boyfriend/husband, but also some kind of father and teacher? They need him to be their emotional crutch, and/or a firm hand leading their action.

In other words, can a harem be formed just between no-string-attached friends-with-benefits?

(This is a question I need to answer in thinking about Isekai and its relation to Hikkikomori/Neets/Incels. If you think about it, when taking about these people, the media (especially in the West) tends to have a condescending tone to tell them that their achievements are not important, whether that achievements are losing your virginity or having a well-paid jobs. "Just be yourself." They said.

I think that depiction has a mote of truth in it, but they also ignore the relationship angle. Hikkikomori/Neets/Incels do lack real, meaningful relationship, not completely because they don't try, but also because the type of relationship they are familiar with are framed in what I would say "vapid"--hierarchy, money, fame, you name it--and they feel like they do not fulfill the expectations that come with these relationship.

By that logic, can we presume that in many Isekai novels, Harem is not necessary? After all, the authors write this kind of works to fulfill their fantasy and others like them. And if that wish is to establish real, meaningful relationship, then why do they write in a harem?

Or, maybe they are unaware of their ignorance about what a true relationship and its expectations really is?)

Rather interesting post. Good insights.

Personally, I think that harem is almost always used as pure wish fulfillment. Bokutachi wa Benkyou ga Dekinai and Go-toubun no Hanayome are probably two of the more modern, better crafted harems out there. I think that isekai in particular have protagonists that are appreciated because they succeed and do great things. The focus on how good they are either in looks, achievements, ability, or in some other ways definitely is taken as a main reason for why their harem members find them attractive.

It is common in anime for it to use the strategy where it takes pretty, good-looking cool/cute characters and has them say emotional things that others can relate to and then internalize because it is much easier to listen to someone who feels awesome than someone that seems normal. The shininess rubs off on the viewer and I think with harems it's similar in terms of otaku reading into the awesomeness of the mc.

The better written romance stories either with WN's, LN's, manga, VN's, anime, jrpg's, anime or other otaku culture related stuff definitely focus more on relationships where both parties like each other for who they are and simply because they just happen to be entangled in each other's lives. Of course, wholesome writing can also be found in things like Karakai Jouzu no Takagi-san. An example of things with harem elements and excellent writing would be Toaru Majutsu no Index (the novels and its spinoffs) and the Legend of Heroes: trails subseries. Those have a lot more depth for me that seem to be more in line with what Flame said above.