"We the archbishop and and the general that mysteriously appeared after being missing are here to tell you that the gods are lying to you, to prove that we have made a deal with the literal devil, look, here he is standing next to us, you can totally believe every word he says to you, trust me bro."
(Crowd cheers)
... honestly, if I saw this amount of concentrated stupid in one place, I would just nuke the whole city and be done with it.
