[Aebliss]

On the subject of 'Make Haruki look less like a jerk' - remember after the first patrol, when Kyon originally finds his bicycle has been towed and he has to walk all the way home, perhaps pay a fine? Haruhi was nowhere to be seen.

In our Seitenkan version, we could have Haruki cycle past and find Kyonko fuming about finding the message about her bicycle having been towed away.

Spoiler for Dialogue ideas:

As I observed the ridiculous fine I was supposed to pay with a feeling of rising chagrin, the most unwelcome voice rang out behind me. There he was, sitting on his own bicycle, scowling at me: Suzumiya Haruki.
"What's this now?" he asked in an annoyingly superior tone of voice. "After managing to be late for every phase of today's patrol, you're planning to break your curfew as well?"
Annoying. So annoying! I heard my own voice becoming shrill, yet didn't try to stop it: "Sh - shut up! My bicycle got towed because I was busy with your pointless patrolling all day long! Just get lost!" Geez, why does this guy have to be the one to see this? So embarrassing ... I'm gonna get it from mom and dad about being late, not to mention the sore feet and ... Yeah. I can hear mom now: 'You're a girl, how could you be so careless as to be walking the streets all alone after dark?'
"Oy!"
Can't you keep your voice down in public? Don't you have better things to do than call out to people pressed for time?
"It's exactly because you're pressed for time that I'm calling to you, dumbass," Haruki retorted. "Get on."
And he points behind himself. Are you serious? You expect me to ride with you after this rotten day?
"I don't want you using a punishment curfew as an excuse to stay away from your duties in the Brigade, now do I?" Haruki explained, somehow managing to sound as if that was obvious. "Hurry up and get on already, I want to get home and eat, too!"
At least you're a little useful ... or so I thought. I got home in record time, but must have lost about ten years of my life. Haruki doesn't just speed, he breaks the sound barrier and ignores oncoming traffic! How is it possible that everything went by in a blur, and yet I still clearly remember every car, truck and motorbike that seemed to be about to splatter us across the pavement? Damn you, Haruki! I need to bail my poor bicycle out soon - either that, or check whether any of the other Brigade members can give me a lift ...
"Don't be late for the Brigade tomorrow," were Haruki's parting words as he briefly braked in front of my house, taking off as soon as I had one foot on the ground. You're not a very gracious driver, Haruki! My wrists and elbows ache from clinging to him so hard and my throat is sore from the screaming ... And he just kept going faster! If I'd squeezed him much tighter, I'd probably have seeped into him through the process of osmosis, yet he didn't even seem to notice.
And if my harrowing bikeride of Hell wasn't bad enough, I saw the curtains twitch back as I approached the front door. Mom, dad ... Please! You've got the wrong idea! If it's my little brother -- I'll buy you chocolate ice cream for two, no, three weeks if you'll shut up about this!
...
Damn you, Haruki!