That's a pretty sensible edit. Actually, I originally chose response A for Mami's Opportunity Choice 1 too but now I might have to rethink it a little.
My bad on taking so long to comment this time. What I thought was going to be a fairly straightforward cramming/procrastination session actually ran on a fair bit longer than I expected it to. These original developments with Mami were certainly a pleasant distraction, however.
In the end, I think I'll stick with response A for MOC1 after all. Aside from being my original choice, it also includes the somewhat important development of Madoka pushing Sayaka to reconcile with Homura. In comparison with choice B had I proceeded into section C1A, too, I'm glad to avoid alienating Sayaka (however temporarily) due to appearing to have hidden lesbian relationships or lesbian tendencies from her.
lol, I wonder how Mami would take to the possibility of Madoka cheating...
Their relationship seems very emotionally intense already. Section C1B seems like it would've been the most lenient towards a harem direction as it looked like Mami was comfortable putting on a little show even with Sayaka present
.
I'm looking forward to more developments on the "cooperation" front with Homura.
Good work on the chapter! I'll still be very glad for the next one.
(The Nisemonogatari reference in this one was kinda subtle, I liked that too
.)