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Old 2008-10-17, 20:38   Link #100
shelter
Every word must conjure
 
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: City of No Yesterdays
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Geta Boshi View Post
I seracheth Heaven, I seacheth Earth .

But I dont find thee anywhere.

Where shall I find thee I ask everyone, I get assured

I ask when,will I meet my wen

Is it today with the hopeful sunrise

Or shall it be tomorrow with dreamy sunset.

I question everyone, now and then.
I know it's supposed to be a poem with a love theme, but it feels like you're talking about helpless, hopeless love here. After reading it, I felt drawn to the "now & then" ending, because it seems there's no conclusion. Which is good, because its a complicated thing you're talking about in just a few lines

Quote:
Originally Posted by Xvoki View Post
To my love,
Today the roses awoke,
Under the sun it’s noble glory.
I dreamt of you, a love so dear,
Who’s loveliness is beyond mortal words.
I’ll think of you when times are hard,
So your face blows away my tears.
Until such time we meet again,
My dreams will burden the years.
Simple, but not simplistic, and straightforward. Seeing this poem makes me miss the time when I could write with plain honesty about things without making it sound so intense.

I especially like the last 3 lines. The images - face/ tears/ dreams/ years - does feel a bit over-sentimental, but it's still a very strong collection of meanings.
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