[Dawnstorm]

Originally Posted by Dwalin

If they are really that close and are helped somehow with the right education, they would make a good family, very solid, better than those made of people who were never very close, there would be less probability of one of them having a desire to cheat on the other and of those never ending arguments which have destroyed so many good families.

That pretty much describes what worries me about the childhoodfriend-romance trope. There are two aspects that bother me, and if they're addressed, then I'm usually fine with it, but if they're not and it just uncritically accepts that line of argument, I'm a bit worried.

1) While sticking together from an early age and transitioning into "family" is good for social cohesion (i.e. they're likely to have a good a life with each other, not divorce, etc. - all the advantages, so to speak), there's also the danger that this leads to things like fear of strangers, narrow-mindedness, etc. - because there are more poeple out there who haven't grown up with you, and you can have a nice life without learning to deal with very different points-of-view. That is: childhoodfriend romances can be unintentionally painting isolationism in a positive light. Taking no risks, trying nothing new.

An example of an anime that treats this very aspect with lots of respect is:

Spoiler for for anime name:

True Tears

Spoiler for plot:

Our main character chooses the childhood friend. It's clear that he chooses stability over risk (he's basically drawing his decision into a picture book). The non-childhood-friend also realises that you can't force somebody to break free. The decision makes sense. I think it's the wrong decision, but I don't have to live with it; the main character does. And it's his decision.

2. The other thing I'm worried about is "friendship vs. romance between boys and girls". If every girl the boy-protagonist gets along with has a crush on the boy, that sort of cheapens boy-girl friendships. This is not something an anime can address by itself, because the individual cases don't have anything wrong with them. It's the trend, not the shows themselves, that bothers me. You get the feeling that the only proper way for a boy and a girl to be close is romance. (That's bothersome in real life, too; I get along very well with a girl, and everyone thinks we might be a couple. What?)

An anime that explicitly deals with this problem is:

Spoiler for for anime:

Boku wa Tomodachi ga Sukunai

Spoiler for for plot:

Here, Yozora and Kodaka are childhood friends who separated. But Kodaka didn't know Yozora was a girl. They meet again, but the precise nature of the relationship isn't clear. When finally Kodaka realises that Yozora is his childhood friend "Sora", he's confused. The entire show is under the heading of "friendship", but romance is implied. The friendship angle and the romance angle between Yozora and Kodaka run side by side, but they're at odds and have no clear resolution. The second season makes things even more complicated. What they need is clarity of feeling and a decision.

Sometimes, childhood friends just have the right sort of chemistry. Latest example:

Spoiler for for anime name:

Robotics;Notes - The nature of the of the protagonists and plot make both my worries very unlikely and they're just cute together. They just have that aura of confidence and remain open to others - no matter the gender.

So I'm not basically against childhoodfriend romances, but I can see plenty of pitfalls to romanticise (as a side-effect) what I feel is unhealthy behaviour (and I think it's much in line with what Chiibi doesn't like). But if an anime manages to nullify my worries, or address them specifically in a plausible way, I'm fine with it. But I am, by predisposition, slightly biased against them.