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It just goes to show how strong the "group vs. me" attitude is over there. Quite a few kids can avoid it for awhile, but it seems to get bred out of them once they reach adulthood. And for what it is worth, these kinds of attitudes are changing. It used to be that women generally just aimed for marriage, holding marriage meetings with potential suitors and, if they got along decently after 5 dates or so, they got married. That attitude is changing, and more women are eschewing marriage in favor of working and earning money for themselves.
It's not really tryhards, just that they put everyone else's feelings, and the group, above themselves. "I may be having a tough time, but I'll put up with it, because the group is more important."
As I said, there are trade-offs to either side of the equation, individuality vs. the group. It's just that I feel America has slanted too far onto the individual side. Japan, at least, is coming down off the group side, and will eventually reach a decent medium. Whether it stays there, or continues to slide, we'll see.
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