Quote:
Originally Posted by RWBladewing
This seems to be the most common advice I see given to people who have never had a significant other but I really don't feel it's that simple. I think many of the people who say this are already confident themselves and don't truly understand what it means to have no confidence at all.
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And I think that some of the people who say THAT just haven't bothered to try. Too often, people assume that just because you're in a different state than them, you've never been in their state. Just recently, when my girlfriend and I were talking about working out at the gym, she complained, "You don't know what it's like to be weak!"
It took some effort to not sarcastically reply, "You're right, that's not fair of me. After all, I've never been to the weight room in all my life and was actually born like this."
The people who say "fake it until you make it" say that because they DID that and it WORKED for them. It's why I have no sympathy for people who have trouble losing weight. "Oh you don't know what it's like!" "You're right, I don't. I just lost 40 pounds this year through happy thoughts alone. It's too bad things aren't as easy for you."
You can say, "it's not easy to do that" all you want (and you'll be right), but that's not going to help anything. At some point you just have to buckle down and do the work. There's no other way.