[Klashikari]

Originally Posted by lildevilinhell

I just read a good portion of her route lately. It gave a lot of background on what happened in their childhood and how things became how they are now.

Spoiler for Kanata's Motivations (Kanata Route):

A copied and pasted parts of a summary of the route I made beforehand.

Spoiler for A promise:

Haruka and Kanata made a promise.
The promise that Haruka and Kanata made to each other was that after they manage to escape that household, they would hand hands together and go see their parents. Until that day comes, they would have to continue to pretend to have a "bad relationship as sisters". Haruka encouraged Kanata to continue rising up as an heir while Haruka herself would continue to be the good for nothing so that Kanata can change the system within the family.

Spoiler for Forgotten:

On the day the heir was decided, it was raining as well.Kanata asks what will happen to Haruka, stating it's not out of sympathy but curiosity. Haruka will be entrusted to the Saigusa's. Kanata in the midst of thought of what would be the best thing to do. She ended up in front of the Saigusa's house. She hesitated and lacked the courage, but she saw a shadow that she hadn't seen for a long time. As she was about to call out Haruka's name, but it was broken off. Haruka looked at Kanata emotionless as if she were dead.

The dialogue from adults, "Do you why there was two hair ornaments? You have no choice but to be second. This is Kanata's will. It been this way since a long time ago. Don't you know it's decided? It seems Kanata already threw away one of them." Kanata tries to say "That not-". Kanata thinks, 'I never thought that. I didn't throw it away. I wouldn't throw it away! Adults continue "She clung to it so sincerely, and she didn't even realize she was tricked."

Kanata's mind continues to cry out it's not true, however... Not a word comes out of Kanata's mouth despite her desperate pleas from her heart for Haruka to not believe them. She tries to ask herself what she should do desperately. Haruka looked at Kanata with the same eyes that she gives the adults, mixed with scorn and hatred. Kanata from the bottom of her heart was crying out that it's not true and hopes for Haruka to remember the promise.

It cuts to a kendo match between Kanata and Haruka. Haruka fails to hit Kanata and hits the floor. She stands back up breathing heavily. Kanata think to herself, 'It's frustrating isn't it, Haruka? To be called a unneeded child.' Kanata understands that Haruka has been suffering from not ever being able to be like Kanata and to be betrayed by her. Kanata wanted to be at the very least Haruka's ally, but no one here would protect them. It was no longer an act of bad relations anymore. The act became reality.

Spoiler for Rough translation of Kendo match between Haruka and Kanata:

Haruka "You were lying. The times that you were kind, they were all lies."

Kanata "..."

(No! That's not it Haruka! That's not true. Remember, Haruka. The promise. The promise the two of us made.)

Haruka "You're cruel. I believed you. I didn't believe anyone else. I only had faith in Kanata. You're too cruel. Kanata, you were laughing at me too. That I'm useless, unwanted, you were laughing at me...! If it was going to be like this... If it was going to be like this... It would've been better if you never let me see your kindness! I would've wanted you to hate me from the very beginning! Being kind... Betraying me... laughing at me in the shadows... Cruel... cruel..."

The hair ornament became the foundation of my sister.
It took only one foundation.
What happens when it is broken into pieces?
This is the result.

Haruka "You tricked me..."

Kanata "... It can't be helped right? You and I are [different]. You or me, anyone would choose me. Anyone."

Haruka "That... just to prove that... You lied... You tricked me?"

Kanata "Yes, because I already knew it was my victory from the beginning. You don't give up Haruka. If I do this much, you'll throw away you naive thoughts."

Those lines made me feel nauseous. Something that those adults would say. Right now, what face do I have now?

Haruka "..."

The sound of grinding teeth. My sister hung her head in shame.

Kanata "..."

Which is the lie? I thought I was acting, these may be my true feelings. (No!)" Having my sister disappear as an excuse, I may be having fun. (No! No!). What should I do? I can't even be kind anymore. This child will reject it. There's a reason for this. For the day we can run away, we promised. I was threatened that if I don't despise her, she'll be erased. But, at this point, can I even convey it to this child?

Kanata "..."

Just one hair ornament was crushed. In this confusion, this child may have found an outlet by hating me.

(Then... It would best for you not know the reason. Without knowing anything, it's best for you to keep hating me. If you can face forward by holding onto that hatred. If that gives you a little more reason to live.) Even if drunk in tragedy, people can live by "Aaah, I'm the only one in pain and unfortunate" by cursing for only their own self, they will protect them-self. For that, you need an enemy. A easy to understand enemy. (I...) The only thing I can do is to continue being [the real enemy]. I can't reveal my feelings, that's all I can do. Any other method... I did not know.

Spoiler for Broken:

At a tattered shed, Kanata opened the door with all her strength. She was shocked and unable to say a word. She saw her sister sitting in mud. The roof had a hole. The wall is not even enough to protect from the wind and rain. It was not a place that person can live in. There were footsteps following Kanata.
Kanata snaps at them and demanded for an explanation without turning to look at them. She tries to approach Haruka, which shrinks away from Kanata. Kanata hears a sorrowful scream from Haruka saying, "No...No... I... won't fail anymore... next time, next time... I'll do my best. I'll try hard... harder.... harder!!!" Kanata stands up with fist trembling screamed "Why... My... What did to my Haruka! You all promised me, that if I worked hard for all of you, that you wouldn't do anything to Haruka! You told me that! What is this? What is the meaning of this! Answer me! Answer me! Why are you silent! ANSWER ME!" No one said anything, none of the people of Saegusa househeld said anything.

Kanata's uncles made an excuse, saying that they couldn't help it, since they needed something to vent their emotions on. The household members claimed the condition of her sister was actually Kanata's fault. The need to vent was caused by Kanata trying to get rid of the traditions that they have long clung to. Kanata tries to appeal to the townspeople and the members of the household that there must be some of them that must realize these traditions are strange. Kanata wanted to change the customs, like how Haruka told her, even though Haruka sees her as an enemy now. Kanata didn't want to forget the promise.

In desperate long pleading, not a single person said a word. At that time Kanata realizes that no one was going to side with her and Haruka, and that no one was going to help them. They told Kanata that she was not a representative, not until a suitable marriage is done. Kanata questions since she thought this was supposed to be after she finished university. They continue to say there's no reason to change the customs, asking isn't Kanata already happy with everything she has received from them. Kanata did not feel happy. She was under surveillance, forced to do what she didn't want to do, not even allowed to rest. There was no happiness, it was painful. But that wasn't what was painful. Her sister has to suffer. Why is this happiness, she thought.


They questioned Kanata's motive and asked whether it was for Haruka sake and to save Haruka. Kanata knows if she says that, Haruka will be removed. Kanata didn't want her sister to be out of hands reach. She lies again and says that breaking these traditions will help build their reputation back and have the people accept the household once again.Kanata begins to think of whether to ask for help or run away. But comes to the conclusion it's only say that. As if running away would save them. If it were that easy, then why is it on television and newspapers there are dozens of children being swept away.

Eventually the discussion was lead into ultimatum. Kanata is eventually cornered to admit that she wants to save Haruka. The told her that if she wants to save Haruka, Kanata must stop her attempts to remove the customs and give up her own future. Kanata questions them that after breaking their promise, how can she believe what they say? Kanata asks what will happen if she refuses. They told her, "As it is now, your sister.... Who will be first? Your expectations being realized or that child breaking."

Spoiler for Another rough translation of a part of this scene:

Kanata "...You. cold-blooded beast!!! You who despised us for being good-for nothing, those words suit you best!"

Househeld "Is that your true feelings? Fufu, are you that man's daughter? However, it seems your younger sister is obedient no matter what's done to her. I wonder if the resemblance is in how your mother and father couldn't do anything but run away?"

Kanata "Don't insult my parents."

Househeld "Insult? It was justified assessment. Whether you parents were the worst, the truth is that they abandoned you and ran away. By no means am I blaming them. Everyone prioritizes themselves first."

Overwhelmed in disgust, I felt nausea.

Househeld "Even Kanata... it's the same for you, isn't it? When I said, you can take her place, you didn't nod did you?"

Kanata "That was.... that was."

I looked down. That was my weakness. That's why, I thought I would change it. That I did not nod. That was my mistake. I wanted to apologize. But, that's no longer possible. If I can't do that, I want to save that child. Even with a detour, I'll make small changes and someday. With that child... My ideas went in circles.There were no exits.

Househeld "What is Kanata's true desire....?"

A gentle voice. That voice slips into the innermost depth's of my heart. I looked around my surroundings. No one looked away, I couldn't respond. Once I've lost that child's smile, I am already alone. There was no help. There was no salvation. Because I'm not an adult. Or maybe because of my birth. Many people were hurt. I was only one of them. Even if I struggle by myself, it is only a powerless child. There is no way to stand up against it.

Househeld "You want to save you sister right?"

That's right, my desire is... What I wished for a long long time ago.

Kanata "...If I agree..."

Looking at the floor, I saw the ground. I could hear the sound of raindrops strongly.

Kanata "If I, abandon, my will.... Will you really save that child? No longer, toward that child, absolutely.... won't do anything...?"

Househeld "Yes"

Kanata "Will you let her go to school?"

Househeld "Aaa, that's fine."

Kanata "Will you let her live with mother and father?"

Househeld "Do what you like."

Kanata "Then, then.... Can I join hands with Haruka??"

Looking up, a cold remark fell on me.

Househeld "That is not allowed. Don't do that."

Kanata "..."

I tightened my lips. I'm not even allowed to hold hands with her. That's what it means to throw away my future. Yes, I understand. But, Haruka will be saved. In that case, isn't that fine? If I become the sacrifice, Haruka will no longer have to do her best. There is time. Certainly. But if Haruka completely breaks, there is no point in her trying her best.

Kanata "If it's now... I can save Haruka."

It felt like a hope. If I presevere, Haruka will be saved. Then, I have to preserve the status quo. This is what they're saying. That is a very, very good method, I thought. I was tired. That child's smile was unreasonably stolen. No... I was the one who stole it. Where did that stolen smile go? If it's out of reach, I've lot my reason for being here.

Kanata "...Haruka."

My important Haruka. My precious Haruka. My little sister.

Kanata "... I understand."

I said. I should have done this from the beginning. It would have been best for me to be doll. I couldn't be a [good older sister]. We were only two sisters. Ever since we were little, we've only had nothing but cruel memories, but we still had fun. For the sake of that child's smile, I have come a long way.

Kanata "I understand. I'll... be at your mercy."

Until today, I did my best. With my resignation, my little sister will become happy. That is already good enough. With just that, it's good.

Kanata "I won't do anything. Even before graduation, you can marry me off to any relative.

I mistakened the definition of a [good older sister].

Doing my best to save my sister was not being a [good older sister].

Kanata "If that would save Haruka."

--At that time, I should've said that I'll take Haruka's place. Then she wouldn't have been tormented. If I did not exist, that child would be happier even more.

I shouldn't have done something stupid. I.... should have killed my own heart. It's easy. I'm only saying what I couldn't say before now. I simply said it. That's all it is...

Househeld "Really? I'm saved by the fact you're a sensible child."

That's all it is...

Househeld "I promise. I'll free your sister. However, only if you keep your end of the promise. Until you graduate, communicate with your sister the same way as before."

Kanata "...Yes. I understand..."

I'm, already, a doll that can only nod.

Spoiler for The conclusion of their childhood:

The deal is sealed, and Kanata meets her two real parents which she greeted with "Hajimemashite (a greeting used to indicate it's their first time meeting, which Kanata finds strange/ironic)". Her parents apologize to Kanata for not being able to help her. Kanata explains that Haruka hates Kanata and her real parents. Her mother asks why Kanata is hated as well.

Kanata did not answer the question, but eventually says "The continued act became reality."
Kanata asks for her parents to live with Haruka, but when her mother asks "Kanata, what about you?"

Kanata "We may never ever meet again. I'm not allowed to tell Haruka. Only until the short period up until the end of summer. A [The fun family game]. That child might not accept it as fun, but her dream was to live with you two. That's why, no matter what happens, please say you're having fun."

Even if Haruka will reject it, Kanata wants her parents to say they're having fun to Haruka.

Kanata "She was never been told that it was fun to be together. That's why, no matter how awkward please say it's fun."

Her mother accepts the request. Kanata finds her own request odd and thinks that they cannot talk naturally. Wondering where the thing that was stolen has gone to.

Her mother holds Kanata's hands, and Kanata notices how her mother's hands could not be depended on. Kanata felt strange as to how no tears had fallen from her eyes, because she has been a doll for a long long time.

Kanata asks that her parents to say that they are happy to with Haruka to Haruka, no matter how awkward and unpleasant the situation, since the two sisters did not understand true happiness. She tells them that Haruka will stay with them. Her mother questions what about Kanata? Kanata says that she can't, and that she will only be able to see Haruka in the short time they have at school. Kanata believes that even though Haruka will be bullied by her, it's better than living over there. She believes that Haruka may be able to make friends, as well as obtain something that Kanata herself cannot grasp.

Coincidentally reread Kanata's route recently, just adding a portion about the hair ornamentsthey were talking about:
(note: the discussion with their parents was only with their Father. Their mother was bed ridden at that time).

Spoiler for Hair ornaments:

Kanata and Haruka were put in competition all the time and their relationship sure went awkward, to the point Kanata had to use some tricks to let Haruka have something she earned.
For instance, Kanata got a set of marbles, which cought the fancy of Haruka, but the latter doesn't want to accept any, even though Kanata offered her half of it.
Not knowing what to do, Kanata used the complete opposite approach and pretend to lend Haruka only 1 marble, but she ought to give it back when Kanata sees it fit.

Over time, the competitions done by the Saigusa became quite taxing. Meanwhile, Kanata receives a weird package with a "Saigusa Kanata" on it. She only opens it much latter to discover 4 hair ornaments. She was puzzled at first but realized with the date that it was intended for both her and Haruka as a birthday present, probably from their mother.
Of course, Haruka declines the offer since she believes that Kanata earned it fair and square.
Kanata went ahead and tells her that she won't bully her or anything, and Haruka is relieved to learn that her sister didn't forget their promise and that she didn't truly hate her, that it was all of a charade until they finally can meet their parents.

Kanata then learns that Haruka was holding off all this time, so Kanata can move forward, as times to times Haruka managed to win, but never took the opportunity to be nasty. She took herself the role of the "bad girl", as she believes in Kanata that she can achieve the "good girl" part. This is also part of their promise, so she decided to hang in there.

In the end, Haruka accepts the hair ornaments, and Kanata agrees to wear her own 2 hair ornaments. And soon enough, Kanata had to revert back to the "bully sister" mode as some relative was coming.

As lildevilinhell explained though, the hair ornament became their bound but also the reason why they were drifting apart. More accurately, at that time, Kanata was wearing only 1 pair of hair ornament, while Haruka was wearing both she had. So the adults told Haruka that it meant that Kanata was destined to be the first, while Haruka will remain second forever.

That said, I must have missed a detail but...

Spoiler for Kanata's route:

why did Kanata only wear 1 hair ornament? Was it in order to fool the Futaki or something?
I'm pretty sure it was never mentioned unless I missed a specific line, but Kanata herself she confirmed she never threw it away.

Suffice to say, reading it again, I think this route is definitely a mandatory read in order to flesh out both characters and give proper answers to everything that had occured in the past. The only problem of that route is how longwinded it can be (not as "beating around the bush" as Haruka's however), and the conclusion is a bit "too easy" but fits quite well the series, whereas Haruka's route was a tad... too disconnected from the LB in general.