Wow, I liked it. Nice job. I hope to see more of it. ^__^
One thing I noticed was this line:
Quote:
Oh why oh why did spend today lounging around?
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Other than that [I had some issues with comma placements or lack of, but no one really cares.], I didn't have a problem with it.
You didn't explain what the fanfiction was about in the post, athough it was pretty obvious once you started reading it.