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Queen of Tragedy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Place of rocks and trees, and trees and rocks...and water.
Age: 33
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanya01
Spoiler for More Changes:
A few days later...
Alicia frowned softly, something had happened, she just knew it. "Linith..?"
"Yes?" Her familiar looked at her, though she seemed to be distracted at the time. "Lady Alicia?"
"You feel that?" It was a terrible pulse of magic, one that chilled her to the bones, and she wasn't even that strong, magically, compared to the rest of the people in her penthouse. She couldn't imagine how it was for Linith.
The two went back to what they had been doing before, Linith cleaning up while Alicia did some tests on various things that were laying around. She looked at the Jewel Seeds before shaking her head. The last thing she wanted to do was experiment on them without double-checking to make sure that they were sealed properly.
The two of them suddenly stiffened as they heard the door get kicked in and Arf yelling. The two were in the living room a moment later and Alicia gasped as she saw Fate's hands and arms. There were deep burns, some gouging, and even blood. "Fate!" She gasped and went to her daughter, taking her from Arf. "What happened?"
"I'm sorry, mother... I just wanted to get the Jewel Seed."
"Why would you risk yourself like that?!" Alicia yelled, worry written all over her face as Linith moved them towards the bedroom. After putting Fate on the bed, Alicia grew more worried as Fate grimaced from that. "Linith..."
The catgirl nodded and gently, carefully, took Fate's clothing off, both women gasped and stared wide-eyed at the series of burns across Fate's upper body.
"Get the bandages, I'll see about healing her." Linith said softly as Alicia got up and went to the bathroom where they kept the bandages. As she worked some healing magic, mostly to stop any sort of bleeding and lessen the pain, Linith sighed as Fate looked away, out of shame. "What's wrong, Fate?"
"I upset mother... I just wanted that Jewel Seed before that other girl got it."
"So you decided you wanted to know what it felt like to become fried chicken?!" Linith snapped at her, getting her to cringe and turn away slightly. Sighing, Linith took a deep breath. "Fate, I'm sorry, but, we're not used to seeing you so badly hurt. It scares us. What if Arf hadn't been there? What if the other girl decided to attack you while you were hurt?" When she didn't respond, Linith ran a hand through her hair, before coaxing her to laying on her back again. "We don't want to lose you, Fate. Your mother would be very sad if you died."
Fate's eyes started to burn with tears as she hiccuped a few times, her breath coming in shuddering gasps, before she rolled over and clung to Linith. "I...I'm sorry!" She started crying, tears falling down her face as Linith, not stopping the healing spell, patted her on the head. She would have rubbed Fate's back, but there were burns there too. Just what had happened out there?
"I'm so so-sorry!" Fate sobbed into Linith's lap. "The other girl got one earlier today and then when the second one popped up, I really wanted to get it and..." She broke down, unable to form words at that time.
Alicia came back at that time and gently sat down on the bed, taking out some burn ointment and started to rub it on her daughter's back and arms. Neither woman said anything as Fate kept crying.
"Feel better?" Linith asked after Fate calmed down. The girl nodded against her lap. "Good... Fate, it's a good thing that you want to get these Lost Logia so badly, but..."
"I don't want you to do something that will get you hurt." Alicia finished for Linith as she continued to rub the lotion onto Fate's body. The two sat Fate up, since the burns were only on her upper body, and applied the lotion to her front. "You're my precious girl, if you died, I wouldn't know what to do with myself."
"I'm sorry." Fate sniffled softly and blinked as Linith wiped her face with a paper towel. The catgirl didn't say anything, thankfully, but Fate still felt bad that she had made both her mother and Linith worry about her.
At times, Linith felt like a mother to Fate, just like Alicia was.
It made her feel warm and happy.
But, she always felt a deep desire to do all that she could to prove herself worthy of the love that both of them and Arf gave to her. And that was why she did such dangerous and stupid stunts.
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Nice to see Fate getting some care and affection  .
The last line wasn't as nice as the rest, it seemed pretty odd to me  . A lot more "telling" than "showing" there...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moczo
And now, everyone's favorite socially inept Number continues her mission to find out what her mission is!
Spoiler for 'Ready, Sette, Go!' Part Two:
Chapter Two:
Upon hearing the stirring of activity in the rooms upstairs, I briefly considered my options.
Most likely, one or more of the inhabitants of the house would soon be coming down the stairs. Probability would suggest that one of my sisters would be the most likely candidate for first arrival, based simply on the fact that they made up the majority of the household population. Were that the case, I would likely have no problems in pursuit of my next objective.
However, a risk had emerged. This structure was also the home of Genya Nakajima (Rank Major, Post Batallion 108, as of last update to his public personell records, has refused three offered promotions in order to remain in command of a criminal investigation unit), and the occasional dwelling of his adopted daughters Ginga (Type Zero Cyborg, A rank mage) and Subaru (Type Zero Cyborg, AA rank mage, extremely loud) Nakajima. The latter two could be extremely dangerous should they perceive me as a threat, while the former was a man of advancing years and could potentially have serious health problems that could be exacerbated by the surprise of seeing me.
It occurred to me, then, that it would perhaps have been prudent to call and send word that I would arriving, and that in the long run it would have been best to use my one gratis prison communique' to do this rather than consult the Doctor. I filed this information away in preparation for the next time I was incarcerated for several years.
Considering the situation, it would be wise to prepare some sort of contingency plan. A peace offering, perhaps, that would, when combined with my earlier consideration, prove that I was absolutely no threat to the denizens of the house.
Ten minutes later, I stared at the strange black thing in the frying pan and nodded. It did not resemble closely the image in the cookbook I had unearthed, but all the ingredients had been used and it should have the same basic structure. Yes, this should serve.
"Ugh, what smells like somebody died...?" said a new voice, as the first arrival entered the kitchen. Ah. Nove. Then my peace offering had been unecessary. Still, better to prepare a weapon and not need it than need it and not prepare it. Nove could occasionally be hostile even to her allies, so it might still be of some use. Further, her actions indicated fatigue; she was rubbing her eyes, her hair was dishevelled, and her footsteps were unsteady. Yes, perhaps I should make the offer just in case her state had left her in a bad mood.
"Good morning, Nove. I have gathered ingredients and constructed pancakes." I said. Then, upon considering the pan in my hands, I added "Or, at this point, pancake. It is nutritious and possibly edible."
"Eh? Thanks, Sette, but before I do anything else I need some coffee." Nove said, beginning to root around through the refrigerator. "Ugh, are we out of cream again? How many times I gotta tell Wendi, if she uses up the last of something, put it on the grocery list?"
"I do not know how many times you gotta tell her." I said.
"Heh. Well, I'm pretty sure we're up to a billion and counting." Nove said, her head still in the refrigerator. "Sette, could you get under the counter and get out the coffeepot? We should make some before the others..."
At this point, Nove stopped in mid-sentence and pulled her head out of the cooling appliance to stare at me. She blinked several times (dry eyes again? Perhaps a version of pink eye that only targeted cyborgs. I should be cautious). She rubbed her eyes, as if to be certain they were still working, and continued to stare at me.
I stared back.
She continued staring.
I offered her the coffeepot. "Here." I said.
"Um... thanks..." She said, her tone indicating some level of emotional distress. "Um... Sette… just out of curiousity, would I happen to be still asleep?"
"No."
"You sure? 'Cause right this moment, I'm thinking that I see you. And that would be pretty good indication this is a dream."
"I don't think I am a dream." I said. "Though if I was a dream, would I know I was a dream?" This was question worthy of consideration, and I resolved to research the matter later. If I was a dream, I should probably know about it.
Nove reached forward tentatively, and patted me on the shoulder a few times. She then poked my chest. She then pinched my cheeks.
"Please don't do that." I said, after this continued for nearly a full minute.
"S-sorry… just making sure." Nove said. "Um… imouto-chan, not to put this the wrong way, but… well… why are you here?"
"I am no longer incarcerated." I said.
"Yeah, I was able to guess that based on the fact that you're in the room… what I meant is more along the lines… y'know, why are you here, in this house? It's just that nobody let you in, so it sorta seems like you broke in."
"I did not wish to wake anyone. This way was more considerate." I said firmly. It was true, after all.
"... suuuuuuuure. That still doesn't explain why you came here at night and committed great violence against some defenseless pancakes."
"Ah. Upon my parole, I determined I had several needs. The primary need was to determine my mission objective upon leaving the prison, to guide my future integration into society and prevent a loss of overall efficiency. The secondary need was a place to live."
"… your priorities haven't changed, I see." Nove said, with an expression that confused me. It seemed to have elements of both amusement and exasperation, which made little sense to me. "But if you just needed some place to crash, wouldn't the Saint Church have made more sense? Some of our sisters are there, too, and well… not that I'm sure dad wouldn't be happy to have you, but they do have a lot more space…"
"Ah. Well…" I began, hesitating slightly. How to put this delicately? "That is related to my first need. I required a command unit, one of my older sisters, to provide me with a mission, an overriding goal. And… there are only two of them who were not incarcerated with me, and given the choice between Cinque-nee-sama or… or Sein-nee-sama…"
Nove clasped her hand on my shoulder, her expression sympathetic. "You don't even have to finish that sentence." Nove said firmly. "You made the only decision anyone sane could make."
"Yes, I thought so." I agreed, glad that Nove could understand. I respected Sein-nee-sama in many ways, but in many other ways I found her... difficult. Particularly when bathing, it was best to make absolutely certain that she was nowhere in the vicinity. Her IS made this difficult, but it was worth the effort.
"But still, you probably should have called first, y'know?" Nove said. "I mean, I'm glad to see you, but not everyone here would be."
"Yes, I realized that belatedly. This is why I have constructed a pancake, as an offering of peace." I said, once again offering her my first completed creation. The first of many, if she would allow me to resume my efforts.
"... ... ... ... ... yeah." Nove said. "Look, follow me, okay? I'm sure you're welcome to stay here, but we'll need to sort some things out."
I followed my sister out of the kitchen and back into the living room, where she said, "Okay, I'm going to go take care of this situation for ya. You just sit in here until I come get you." She then gestured to the chair I had spent most of the night in, indicating I sit in it.
"Yes, I am capable of doing that." I said, knowing for a fact that I was able to perform to her expectations in this matter. I could, if necessary, remain seated in the chair in question for several hours without a noticable degredation of my capabilities.
"Now, our sisters will be happy to see you, but Ginga is staying over the night, and if she spots you before someone explains the situation, it could be trouble. So I need you to stay here until I bring everyone down to see you, all right?" Nove said, leaving me in the living room to head back upstairs.
It was a very good plan, in theory. Unfortunately, its effectiveness was diminished somewhat by the fact that Ginga Nakajima (Type Zero combat cyborg, Mage Rank A) had actually descended from the top floor and entered the kitchen to prepare her breakfast while Nove had been guiding me to the living room. And so when Nove went back upstairs, Sergeant Nakajima (Like her father, she had turned down several offered promotions in order to remain a field investigator) entered the room I was sitting in to determine whom she had heard speaking. Or I assume this to be the case, mind-reading is not within my capabilities.
Ginga Nakajima stared at me for some time. I got the impression that, unlike Nove, she was not doing so out of only disbelief.
"Hello." I said.
"Blitz Caliber!" She snapped, her Mage Device glowing brilliantly to clothe her in a Barrier Jacket... and importantly to my case, arm her.
This was a problem. My Inherent Equipment had not been returned to me after my release, for obvious reasons, and without my Boomerang Blades my IS was largely useless as well. I was more than capable of defending myself against most common threats, but Ginga was not only a Mage, but a Cyborg as well. Attempts to battle her without my weaponry would most likely result in me being quite severely beaten and ejected from the household.
"I don't know how you got out of prison, or how you got in here..." Ginga said, "But if you think I'll let you hurt even one member of my family, you've got another thing coming!" With only that warning, she charged, light gleaming around her Revolver Knuckle as the mechanisms spun rapidly, the weapon clearly poised to put me through a wall. I took the only defense I possibly could.
I raised both hands and said, "I surrender."
"Wh-ULF!" Ginga said. Evidently such an end to the 'encounter' had caught her somewhat off-guard, because she startled visibly... and, considering that she was moving at a considerable speed while on rollerblades, fell, skidding face-first along the floor until her momentum bled off. "Ooooowwwwwww..." She said, face still firmly in the floor.
"... ... would you like a pancake?" I asked, not certain what else to say. "There is only one, because Nove would not let me finish, but it is potentially good."
Without removing her face from the floor, Ginga said, "Er... I realize I'm stretching here, but is there any chance this is a dream? Because I did just wake up, and this whole situation is awfully surreal..."
"I do not think so. At least, the odds that both you and Nove are dreaming the same thing would be quite unlikely." I offered. "Although I suppose I could be dreaming, but I did not fall asleep so that is doubtful."
"What?!" Came a familiar shriek from upstairs, halting our brief conversation there. "SetteSetteSetteSetteSette!" Came Wendi's delighted squeals as she leapt... literally... down the stairs, stormed into the room, and wrapped me in a hug quite against my will. "Sette! It is you! Oooooh, imouto-chan, it's so good to see you again! It's been way, way too long, you never call, you never write, it's been ages! Nove just told me, she's waking up Cinque-nee and Dieci-nee right now, we're all going to sit down and have breakfast together like a family so welcome back!"
"Hello." I said, with a certain amount of difficulty. My lungs were having problems acquiring enough oxygen.
"Ah, I've missed that blank, understated expression of yours!" Wendi said in satisfaction. "... Ginga, what are you doing? Geez, playing on the floor when we have guests? What are you, five?"
"Are we sure this isn't a dream? Because I'd like it to be." Ginga said.
Spoiler for Author's Note:
This chapter was meant to be longer, but that was just such a good cut-off point I couldn't resist. This fic might end up being like, ten shorter chapters instead of five longish ones. Not sure how I want to play this out. Depends on how much story I can fit into the next few.
Oh, and don't expect the next chapter to come out this quickly. I'm not know for my speediness and I've got three other projects open
FF.net link right here. Hopefully this one won't get boned by the site. |
Very amusing! 
I'm eager to see what comes about after this, such as how Cinque is going to convince Sette to have a normal life XD.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanya01
Sorry about the MASSIVE delay.
Rising Dragon, my pre-reader, had some major RL problems (he can tell you if he wants to), so, it's understandable.
Previous chapters can be found via my sig.
Day in the Life
Chapter 38
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Nice action-packed chapter. I admit, I love the first guard of Nanohaverse, so seeing the new, younger characters come in to save the day isn't quite my thing . Nonetheless, it's nice to see the Numbers and the ex-Forwards getting some spotlight.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaijo
A small one-shot, simply because DC's fic had me thinking.... and that's never a good thing...
Spoiler for An Unfamiliar Feeling:
Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha
An Unfamiliar Feeling
Xx~~*~~xX
Fate's eye's snapped open and she took inhaled deeply, as if she hadn't been breathing for quite awhile.
"It's okay, Fate, you're okay!" Shamal's voice soothed as her hands steadied the patient.
Fate glanced around at the people surrounding her, wondering why she felt strange. "Where... what happened?"
She blinked, her voice sounding a bit odd to her. She also felt quite weak, almost numb, unable to move her body; had she just come out of surgery?
"You were badly injured, and thanks to Nanoha and Shari, we were able to save your life," Hayate explained, Rein floating beside her master while giving Fate an odd look.
Fate found Nanoha and Shari on the far side of the room, looking rather weak, guilty, and ashamed while a pair of Enforcers apparently kept them under guard. "Injured? What happened? I vaguely remember a fight, then it went black..."
Shamal and Hayate glanced worriedly at each other, some secret passing between them.
"You were chasing some criminals, but walked into a trap," Hayate explained sadly. "They brought you to the hospital, but you weren't going to make it."
"But I'm alive," Fate noted, somehow feeling a bit different, but unable to figure out why. "So why are Nanoha and Shari under arrest?"
"I'm sorry, Fate-chan," Nanoha apologized, tears in her eyes, barely able to meet Fate's gaze. "I couldn't let you die... I had to.... It was all my fault; I was the one who-"
"No!" Shari denied forcefully. "It's more my fault than yours!"
"They worked all night to save you, but what they did wasn't legal, and they have charges they'll need to answer to," Hayate explained, while still leaving important details out.
A sickening feeling began to make it's presence known in Fate's gut, as she glanced down at her hands, slowly starting to realize something was very wrong. "What... what did you do to me...?"
"There will be some... changes and adjustments," Shamal soothed again. "And we'll get you all the help and counseling you need..."
Rein floated down and landed, giving her a hopeful-yet-sorrowful smile. "But at least you're alive, and it's not so bad."
It was then that Fate noticed that Rein appeared larger than normal, as the little girl took her hand; in fact, everyone else appeared a bit larger than normal. [No no no no no no! It couldn't be!]
Fate immediately got up and stared at Rein, then at her own, small body. "I'm a... I'm a... I'm a... no no no NO!"
Nanohda twiddled her fingers. "Sorry, Fate-chan, but it was the only way to save you..."
Shari merely chuckled nervously. "Heh hehe heh...."
Chibi-Fate-chan, the newly born unison device, fainted.
Xx~~*~~xX
Author's notes:
Figured Nanoha could get some revenge for what happened in DC's fic.^^;; Revenge is a dish best served... small.
And just because I've recently watched the Shana-tan and Index-tan OAV specials....
Xx~~*~~xX
Bonus ending:
Nanoha sighed as she walked through the streets, crumbs continuing to accumulate in her hair as people on the street stared. "Do you really have to do that?"
"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" Fate-tan declared from the top of Nanoha's head, still rather put off by her miniature size as she continued to pull melon bread after melon bread from subspace to munch on. "This is all your fault! And if you protest, I'll.. I'll... do something bad!"
"Okay, okay, I'm sorry!" Nanoha quickly offered as Fate-tan started to concentrate, breathing a sigh of relief as she stopped.
Fate-tan harumph'ed, and then resumed her munching while mumbling darkly, "And Shari's fault, too. Can't believe you got her to do this to me..."
Nanoha twiddled her thumbs. "Well, actually... she really didn't need much convincing..."
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LOL, Nanoha gets her revenge, eh? XDDDD I wondered for a moment where it was going, as I doubted that you were going to make Fate a familiar, but the ending was still a surprise .
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanya01
Spoiler for More Changes:
"Hmm..." A woman with long green hair stared at the monitor in front of her. "Dangerous games these children play."
"M...Mother!" A young boy with blue hair by her gasped in shock. "How can you say that?"
The woman turned to her son and smiled. "Because I don't think either of them are trying to hurt each other. It would be nice if they were just trying to collect the Jewel Seeds and got a little too competitive with each other. Besides, they are cute, ne?" She winked and held up a finger, causing the boy to look away as his face turned red.
A girl with brown hair turned to the woman and gave her a look that bordered between exhasperated and irritated. "Admiral, wouldn't it be a better idea to get the Jewel Seeds ourselves?"
The Admiral turned to her and nodded. "Oh, it would, I admit, but we have no idea just how much damage the Jewel Seeds have done." She looked at a new video window. "Well, it seems that they've started fighting again. Chrono, perhaps you should go down there and see if they'll be willing to listen to us."
"Of course." The boy bowed his head and walked off to a tube at the back of the room.
"Oh, and Chrono..."
"Huh?" He looked at his mother as she grinned in a way that had him tremble slightly with worry.
"Do try to be diplomatic in this situation. I'd hate to have a fight start due to a misunderstanding again."
The boy's face flushed. "That wasn't my fault." Really, it wasn't. How was he supposed to know that accidentally knocking over a house of cards was considered a criminal offense on that last world?
She giggled at him and nodded. "Of course, good luck, dear."
After watching Chrono disappear, the girl turned to the woman. "Admiral Lindy, was that really neccessary?"
Lindy smiled at the girl. "Amy, sometimes it helps to be constantly reminded of small failures. It helps us avoid big ones in the future."
"So..." Amy's face took on an annoyed bent at that point. "Why bring up that those girls were cute to Chrono?" Sure, she was a couple years older than Chrono was, but she still liked him. Now if only he'd stop being so stiff and formal all the time.
Lindy shrugged as she watched Chrono interrupt the fight between the two girls. "To be honest, I just want him to interact with more people close to his age. It's not good to be around adults all the time, even if one of them is just a teenager." She winked at Amy, who just shook her head and looked back at the screen. "Well, that was a bit unexpected." She hadn't expected the redheaded familiar to attack her son like that. "Amy, can you track them?"
"Already on it, ma'am." Amy's hands flew over the keyboard in front of her before she grimaced and sighed. "I'm sorry, but they did multiple teleports in quick succession, tracing them would take so long that by the time we caught up with them..." She trailed off, disappointed.
Lindy shook her head. "No, it's okay. No one's perfect after all." She smiled as it looked like Chrono was able to talk the other girl into at least coming on board. "At the very least, we should be able to find out what's been going on on this planet."
Amy nodded, though, deep down, she wondered who was going to get in trouble for what was going on. Non-Administered worlds just didn't have powerful mages laying around after all, and Lost Logias didn't just pop up on those worlds either.
So, why were two mages of such power actually fighting on the planet?
Um... Sorry that it's basically canon again. |
Yay, Amy and Lindy! It's nice to see more of what Amy might have been thinking about Chrono .
A general comment, can you please label each part more clearly? It's hard to keep track of which part is where, and such... Numbering the sections would be nice !
Quote:
Originally Posted by 00-Raiser
So between my other stuff, I did manage to squeeze this one out, if only because I wanted to get some dark thoughts out of my head. Yes, this fic has some dark twists pertaining to Hayate's past. No, deathcurse hasn't cornered the market on giving Hayate a hard time  Wasn't quite sure where I was gonna take this idea, but it managed to drag me along instead
Spoiler for Behind the Smile:
In the beginning people thought it was so unfortunate that I was born without the ability to use my legs. They’d offer their sympathy and assistance, but I would just smile at them and say it wasn’t necessary.
The fact was I was far from unhappy. Sure, I was bound to my wheelchair, but that was just the way it had always been. It was normal for me so I never despaired over it. I had no reason to because I was extremely happy since I had such kind, loving parents by my side.
But then I didn’t and my Hell began.
Having no living relatives, there wasn’t much choice other than dumping me into the system. While the lawyers and whoever else argued over what was to be done with my family’s estate and possessions, I was placed into a foster home.
The couple I was sent to live with were all smiles when I arrived. Both of them were on the chubby side, giving off the sort of impression one would expect from the Claus family. By all appearances they were warmly welcoming a poor unfortunate child into their home with the intent of caring for her.
Appearances can be deceiving.
As soon as the social worker dropped me off, the pleasant air froze over and the happy faces petrified.
“Okay you little brat.” They said. “While you’re staying here you’ll earn your keep, you hear?”
Certainly I had no intention of freeloading. I could clean what I could reach, and my mother had taught me how to cook so helping around the house wouldn’t be much of a problem.
These people quickly proved to be unsatisfiable, however. My attempts to help out resulted in smacks and scolds of “you’ll just break something” or “I know how to prepare dinner!” They took it upon themselves to ‘educate me’ on my proper place, which usually involved knocking over my wheelchair. They’d say how I should crawl along the ground like the scum I was while handing me a toothbrush with instructions to scrub the floor.
I could only take refuge in the room they had given me. It was a nice enough room, I suppose. It had to be, or else when the officials came for their inspection they’d know something was up. Oh how I desired to speak up about the horrible treatment I was receiving, but the threats kept me silent.
“If you talk we’ll hunt you down and make you pay!”
Imagining what would be worse than what I was already going through had my mouth clamped tight. When asked how things were going, I’d just smile and say things were great.
If I had known what was yet to come, maybe I would have taken the chance after all.
He came in late one night, swaggering up to my bed, the putrid stench of the booze waking me up. Before I could say anything, a hand smothered my mouth and he was on top of me, tearing away the sheets and pulling at my pyjamas.
His weight pinned me to the bed, rendering me immobile despite my attempts to resist. Yet his hand, tongue, and other unmentionables found their way across my now exposed body, causing muffled cries of terror in their wake.
“I said you were going to earn your keep.” He whispered in my ear before flipping me onto my stomach. “Your virginity will sell for a high price, but why should I miss out on sampling the merchandise? I can just use the back door.”
And use it he did. I wanted to fight back, to kick and scream, but my useless legs were no good and his hand remained firmly over my mouth.
It hurts.
Oh God it hurts.
Stop.
Make it stop.
Help me.
Some one help me!
Even if I could get the words out, what would it have done? Would that woman come to save me? Would she stop her husband from raping me? I can say without a doubt that the answer was no.
“This is our secret, little girl.” He said sweetly when he had finished. “You know what’ll happen if you tell.”
Violated, I just lay there for the rest of the night, staring blankly at the wall as my vision swam. Why was this happening? What had I done to deserve all this? I didn’t understand it. I had been a good girl, hadn’t I? I listened to my parents and I was nice to others, so why did I have to suffer so much?
I wanted to do something about it, but what could I have done? I was just a weak and defenceless child stuck in a wheelchair. Resisting was out of the question and I couldn’t even run away because of my damn legs!
He would come in again other nights to repeat the process and I had lost my only sanctuary. The pain would linger even after he had finished, making the following day a nightmare as well since I had to sit in my chair the whole time.
I desperately searched for some kind of escape, and I managed to find one. The child friendly façade the household sported featured a collection of books that I wouldn’t be hit for touching. And so I escaped into fiction, immersing myself in stories about brave warriors, fierce dragons, mighty robots, and the epic battles they participated in. Fantasy stories in particular I was rather fond of. Some books had illustrations, and I was quite impressed with the costume designs.
They did the trick and got me away from it all. They had me dreaming of the day when a handsome prince would ride up on a white horse and take me somewhere far away where I wouldn’t be spat at, hit, or sodomized.
How fitting that my salvation arrived in the form of a piece of paper.
I remember how excited I was when I got that letter and learned that an old friend of my father’s was willing to support me. He had arranged it so that I could return to the home I shared with my parents and he would see to it that I’d have everything I needed to survive on my own.
The couple fought this, of course. They finally had a buyer, apparently, so thank God I was saved when I was. I moved out of that house and never looked back.
It was some small consolation that I received a visit from the police some time later. They wanted to ask some questions about that couple after they got busted for child trafficking, among other things. I refused to comment, though. I didn’t want to relive those horrible weeks.
With a new lease on life, I began my time alone. It was hard, living in that house with all those memories of happier times. I half expected my parents to jump out at any moment and we’d all have a big surprise party. That never happened, obviously. I had moments where I’d just cry in the empty building, but given the alternative it suited me just fine. Again, books helped stave off my loneliness and I was glad that the local library was nearby.
I worked hard to keep the household in shape. I keep things tidy and kept myself well fed to show everyone I could take care of myself and I didn’t need to be sent to another foster home.
Money was never an issue, as my father’s friend gave me more than I needed. He even arranged for me to receive treatment at the local hospital. Thanks to him and Dr Ishida I finally remembered what it was like to have some one care about you. I didn’t want to cause them too much trouble, though, so I never told them what I had been through. Whenever they asked if I was okay I’d just smile and say I was fine.
I had no idea who my benefactor was, but that got me excited since it reminded me of a book I had read. Like in the book I wrote him letters letting him know how I was doing and stuff like that. He’d write back and his words definitely gave off the feel of an older, dignified gentleman. I wondered if I’d ever get to meet him in person.
Another meeting came before that, though. I’ll never forget the morning of my ninth birthday. As usual I had gotten lost in a book and read it until midnight. When the clock chimed, they appeared and my life changed once again.
Signum, Shamal, Vita, and Zafira. It had all been quite unbelievable at first: magic, ancient books, physical constructs of programs… It really was like something out of one of my books!
They looked to me as their master, asked me to give them orders, but I would have felt wrong doing it. When I heard of their pasts, of how they would be used for nefarious purposes and treated cruelly by their previous masters, it brought back memories of scrubbing the floor with a toothbrush, and that man’s weight on top of me. I knew of such horrors and would not subject them to such things. I would not use them that way.
And so I had gained a family. They were not mere programs in a book, they were wonderful people who filled my days with joy. It was unbelievable how happy I was. I had finally moved out of that Hell and gained a little paradise, but a part of me worried. To be blessed with so much happiness at once was an ill omen. It wouldn’t last long.
That Christmas I was sent back to Hell.
I once again lost my family, and this time it was by the hand of people I thought were my friends.
I had had enough.
All it took were those dark thoughts to set things in motion.
When that long night came to close, things were back to being great again. My family was restored, my legs would be healed, and Reinforce had been freed of the corruption that had caused so much trouble. I thought everything was going to be fine, but…
Why does fate hate me so much?
Reinforce finally had a chance to be happy, but the defence program was beginning to rebuild itself inside of her and the only way to finally put an end to it was to put an end to her. I begged her not to do it, actually ordered her not to, but…
It just wasn’t fair! Why did such a cruel thing have to happen? Yet again I had to watch another person dear to me leave and never return.
I barely had time to grieve before I was swept up in what was to follow. Because I was technically a criminal, I had to answer to the Bureau and face several inquiries and trials. Thankfully I was given some leniency, but I didn’t have much choice in regards to my future path. I would have to become a mage for the Bureau and that was that.
I didn’t mind it so much since it gave me and my kids opportunities for a happy life and to use our abilities for the good of others.
I was prepared to accept that, when I received summons to meet with a certain individual. He was one Admiral Gil Graham, and he revealed to me that he the mysterious friend of my father who had been supporting me. I was pleasantly surprised on several levels. Here was the man who I had dreamed of meeting for so long, and he was actually a high ranking official that operated on another world.
There were so many things I wanted to talk to him face to face about, but before I could even open my mouth he got down on his knees and apologised to me. I was rightly confused by his actions and he proceeded to explain everything to me.
He wasn’t really a friend of my father. He had only reached out to me because I was Reinforce’s current master. He’s the one who had my knights killed before me in order to completely the book and make it go berserk. It was all for the sake for sealing the book and me along with it in ice and tossing me into a dimensional rift. He claimed it would ensure the book would never cause harm again, and since I had no one, my sacrifice wouldn’t have been such a big deal.
No one cared about me, after all.
For a moment I thought my paralysis had spread to my whole body. Sure, I wasn’t expecting to marry him when I found out who he was, but this… What was I supposed to think of it? This man had saved me from that foster home, but only so he could lock me away for good.
He had used me, just like how that other man had used me.
I wanted to be furious at him, and on some level I was, but even if his intentions were to seal me away the fact remained that if it wasn’t for his actions I would probably be some glorified sex toy sold to the highest bidder. I wouldn’t have met Dr. Ishida, wouldn’t have gained my family, and wouldn’t have made the friends I have now…
Should I hate him or be grateful to him? I just didn’t know. When he begged for forgiveness I wasn’t sure if I could give it to him. He did seem sincere, though, so even if I didn’t mean it I threw on a smile and told him it was okay.
Even now that he lives in England, I still keep in contact with him. I guess that means I did eventually forgive him after all.
Still, my faith had been shattered because of it and it was awhile before I found myself trusting a man again. I know it wasn’t fair to all the guys out there, but I couldn’t help it. I received my fair share of love letters in school, not as much as Fate-chan or Suzuka-chan, but a decent amount. I wanted to give them a chance, but whenever they looked at me in the way hormone driven teenage boys do, I’d always see the face of the man who raped me. That hungry look in his eyes that saw me as a piece of meat was burned into my memory and my attempts to forget proved futile.
I tried to combat this by being rather physical with my female friends. I thought that maybe if boys saw me groping other girls they’d think I was a lesbian and give up on me. But maybe my aversion to boys had me wanting to convince myself that I was into girls? If that was the case, it didn’t work. I still desired to be with a boy, but I was just too afraid.
Then again, I had been groping the others long before then, so I wonder… Did I want to feel and focus on others’ bodies because I was disgusted with my own? Their bodies are unsullied and maybe I hoped some of that would transfer to me.
All things considered, that was the only blight on my life during the years. I could walk again and I was surrounded by family and friends, but my past still haunted me. I didn’t dare tell the others about it. How could I? They were all enjoying their lives and I didn’t want to bog them down with my story, especially my kids who were finally free from their own pasts.
The situation at school proved a bit too much, though, so the moment I graduated middle school I decided to leave Earth and move to Mid Childa to be a mage full time. I was just running away, but I wanted to leave those horrible memories behind me.
But that was impossible. No matter where you are, people don’t change.
I worked hard in an attempt to climb up the chain of command. The higher position I got, the more I’d be able to help those at large. I took a variety of tests and exams, but there was a rather large obstacle in my way. My criminal record was always being rubbed in my face and used as an excuse as to why I failed.
But that wasn’t the worst of it. Often times I was approached with certain propositions from high ranking male officials. They offered to forget about my past and give me desirable positions if I did certain types of favours for them.
I was disgusted by their forwardness and terrified by how many others wore the same face as my ex-guardian. I promptly refused, naturally, but that just meant I’d need to work even harder to obtain what I wanted.
The stress of it all had me falling back to an old crutch: reading. After a day of crushed dreams, I would head to the library for something to lose myself in. The Bureau’s library certainly lived up to its name, so there was no shortage of things to choose from.
Plus, he was there too.
I’d never really spent much time with Yuuno-kun before. I’d see him around a few times, and Nanoha-chan would often talk about him, but I didn’t know him that well otherwise. I was a bit apprehensive around him at first, but I still smiled and politely conversed with him.
It didn’t take long for me to get comfortable around him. There was just something about him that put me at ease. Be it his kind nature or gentle smile, I always felt safe around him. I enjoyed having long conversations with him, discussing a case I was working on, or a book I had read recently. He’d offer his input, giving suggestions on an angle to pursue, or what novel I might enjoy reading next. It was so much fun. He treated me like a friend and he didn’t look at me the way other guys did.
I’m not sure when it was I started wishing he would.
It just figures, doesn’t it, that the one guy I finally fall for has absolutely no interest in me romantically. Whatever higher power there is sure loves messing with me.
Yuuno-kun had a thing for Nanoha-chan, that much was clear, so I knew I didn’t stand a chance. Nanoha-chan is so vibrant and pretty while I was dirty and disgusting so I resigned myself to defeat. It hurt to see them chat happily together, but I smiled with them anyways.
I bore all my hardships the best I could, but even I have my limits. One big thing finally pushed me over the edge.
I was in on the bust of a large Lost Logia smuggling ring and it went off perfectly. We stormed their headquarters and arrested them all with zero casualties. While sweeping the rest of the building, I discovered a horrific room. It was rank with the stench of every bodily fluid imaginable, but what the nose smelled was nothing compared to what the eyes saw.
Chained to the wall were several children, all of whom were naked and covered in cuts, bruises and other sorts of wounds. Smuggling Lost Logia weren’t the only illegal thing the criminals did.
While other mages rushed in to free the children, I just stood there in shock. Their eyes, dear God, their eyes were so pained, defeated, and empty. But I didn’t see them, no. The one I saw chained to that wall was me as a little girl, alone, frightened, beaten, and used. I swear I was going to be sick on the spot, but I managed to hold on. I had a job to do, and I did it, but images of that room kept forcing their way into my thoughts.
It was late, but the moment I was free to go my feet took me to the library. There had to be some large book there I could let absorb me, anything to get my mind somewhere else.
I should have known Yuuno-kun would still be there.
I wanted to be alone in case I broke down, but that was not meant to be. I just smiled and said I was fine but he – ha ha – read me like a book. Concern was plastered over his face and the sincerity of it was too much for me.
I broke.
I swear I cried so much I suffered dehydration. Poor Yuuno-kun should have caught a cold after he let me sob into his chest, but he just held me until I let it all out.
I told him about what I saw and how it had affected me. Before I could stop myself I also told him about what had been done to me while I was a child, how that man would sneak into my room every night and do those things to me. He was the first person that I ever told that too, and he was the last person I wanted to find out. I was afraid that if he knew, he’d shove me away and never want anything to do with damaged goods like me ever again.
What an idiot I was. Yuuno-kun wasn’t the kind of person who would do something like that. Instead he held me tighter and stroked my hair, whispering in my ear that it was okay, that it wasn’t my fault, that I wasn’t dirty or disgusting.
Hearing him say those things helped immensely. Finally getting it out and hearing such encouragement broke the chains in my chest. My secret was revealed, but here was a trusted individual who I cared for and who I knew cared for me completely accepting it. For the first time the darkness of my past was obliterated by the light of my present.
I guess the truth does set you free.
He wiped away my tears, gave me a tissue to blow my nose with, and that loving smile he gave me… Damn, it made me fall for him even harder.
With his support behind me, I soon told everything to Nanoha-chan and the others. They actually sat there and cried with me when I had finished and I thanked the heavens for giving me friends who cared for me so much. They didn’t think any less of me, they were just a little mad that I didn’t tell them about it sooner. That got a little laugh out of me and it made me smile, really smile, freely and easily for the first time in a long time.
Things changed for the better after that, and so far it’s stayed that way. I hope fate is finally giving me a reward for all the crap it put me through. With my loved ones by my side I’ve renewed my determination with more vigour. Criminal record or no, I will one day become a top commander and nothing will stand in my way! As for Yuuno-kun, well, I’ve been far less successful in that department…
But hey, I’m working on it!
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Er, nice to see that I'm inspiring more Hayate darkfics! More seriously, this is pretty grim, but keeping out of the melodramatic angst territory .
Hayate's mental thoughts were written really well, still keeping her relatively determined and optimistic while adding that more serious, grimmer side to her.
I loved the ending, it was humourous and very in character. It does let this potentially very emotionally downer story become more optimistic at the end ^^.
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