[Mystique]

Originally Posted by Shinoto

Did she say something like this?
I really like you. I do. You're so nice, and sweet, and you listen to all my problems and respond with the appropriate compliments. But, well, I don't really see a relationship in our future. It would be terrible if we let sex destroy this great friendship we have where I get everything I want and you get nothing you want. Don't you think?

I knew you would understand. You always do.

We're so perfect as friends, you know? I can tell you anything, and you know you can always come to me anytime you need to hear me bitch about work or how ugly I feel. You wouldn't want to ruin a friendship like that just so you could be my boyfriend, and have me look at you with desire and longing in my eyes, if only once—would you? Of course not. Well, if we started dating, it would only complicate this wonderful setup I've got going here.

It's just…you're like my best friend, and I would hate for something you desperately want to change that. I mean, sure, we could go on some dates, maybe mess around a little and finally validate the six years you've spent languishing in this platonic nightmare, but then what? How could we ever go back to the way we were, where I take advantage of your clear attraction to me so I can have someone at my beck and call? That part of our friendship means so much to me.

No. We are just destined to be really, really good friends who only hang out when I don't have a boyfriend, but still need male attention to boost my fragile and all-consuming ego.

Anything can happen once you bring romance in. Think about how awful my last relationship was at the end, remember? The guy I'd call you crying about at 3 a.m. because he wouldn't answer my texts? The guy I met at the birthday party you threw me? I had insanely passionate sex with him for four months and now we don't even talk anymore. God, I would die if something like that happened to us.

Plus, ick, can you even imagine getting naked in front of each other? I've known you so long, you're more like a brother that I've drunkenly made out with twice and never mentioned again. It'd be way too weird. And if we did, then whenever you'd come shopping with me, or go to one of my performances or charity events, or take me for ice cream when I've had a bad day at work, you'd be looking at me like, "I've seen her breasts." God, I can't think of anything more awkward that that.

Oh, before I forget, my mom says hi.

Anyway, you would totally hate me as your girlfriend. I'd be all needy and dramatic and slowly growing to love you. If I was your girlfriend, I would never be able to tell you all about the other asshole guys I date and pretend I don't see how much it crushes you. Let's never lose that. That's what makes us us.

Don't worry. You're so funny and smart and amazing, any girl but me would be lucky to date you. You'll find someone, I know it. And when you do, I'll be right by your side to suddenly become all flirty and affectionate with you in front of her, until she grows jealous and won't believe it when you say we're just friends. But when she dumps you, that's just what we'll be.

Best friends. Friends forever.

Because if she did, The Onion beat her too it

Now if want to add a cherry on top to it all
Say" We'll I have plenty of friends already"after she is done giving you the friend's speech.

I was about to say 'wow, bitter much?"
But then realised that its a parody anyways.

Thing is, espeically with the part I singled out, that kinda stuff maybe you'll hear from teenage girls more than people in their mid-late 20's (for some reason, we're more happy to take the risk) - but it's out of fear.

The fear of risking what you've already established to go further against the fear of it not working out and losing it all.
Not everyone can be friends with their ex's, not all break ups are even friendly and you end up hating each other because emotions run deep.

Moments like that, some girls don't wanna chance and thus use the friend level as an emotional barrier.
There are the bitter, shallow girls like the Onion parody, sometimes methinks you should just tell them to their faces plainly:

"Sorry, I can't be a 'friend' only to you. I actually wanna f*ck you.
I want to make love to you, look after you, dedicate my life to you and it kills me to pretend otherwise.
If you truly can't see me as a man and not as your 'best buddy', then this is where we say goodbye."

Yeah yeah, she'll be shocked, may slap you, etc, but she'll be majorly disillusioned, shaken and forced to look at you in a different way.
Whether she really feels "creeped out" by it or begins changing her thoughts of you over the weeks, is also a risk many men are afraid of finding out with and remain silent.

If after confessing and she truly and sincerely views you as a friend but doesn't abuse you in terms of telling her exploits with bad guys and supports you, then it's for the guy to decide if he can continue on this level or walk away.
Those who walk away... I dunno... maybe sometimes it'll work out better cause the girl's lost a friendship, which he obviously values so it's a quick harsh lesson that to befriend guys to the level of emotional support carries a risk of something developing further.

Some girls don't realise it or even see it, at the loss of a good person, perhaps they'll open their eyes more and spout out less of the:

We're so perfect as friends, you know? I can tell you anything, and you know you can always come to me anytime you need to hear me bitch about work or how ugly I feel. You wouldn't want to ruin a friendship like that just so you could be my boyfriend, and have me look at you with desire and longing in my eyes, if only once—would you? Of course not. Well, if we started dating, it would only complicate this wonderful setup I've got going here.

(Good, kind, caring) Sex doesn't destroy a friendship.
It just makes it much more vunerable but it takes it to another higher level.
Not all can handle that transition, and thus prefer to stick in a realm that's just "safe".

Fear steals a lot of opportunities in our life.
Life is short, time is precious, use it wisely.

Originally Posted by Ledgem

But then again, that's all planning from a logical stand point. As the saying goes, "Man tries to plan, and God just laughs." Life is unpredictable and you can never know what's coming your way. Try to look ahead, but ultimately do what you think is right.

I'm ironically enrolled in that "Life Lesson" at present, it's incredibly frustrating to have that kinda control taken away from you, but we can only make the best of each day as much as we can