[Shinoto]

Originally Posted by Ledgem

It's true that your chances of forming a strong relationship are much improved when you're stable as an individual. In fact, one could argue that being stable on your own is a prerequisite for being able to form a stable, long-lasting, productive relationship.

I take issue with your rough demeanor. Splitpersonality seems to be a sensitive, thoughtful guy, perhaps to a fault. What he's writing isn't pathetic; I find it understandable. It isn't his fault and he shouldn't be blaming himself right now, but I don't think he should reject those types of thoughts entirely. Those sorts of feelings are what keep you humble enough in a relationship to be able to admit that you might be wrong and that you need to make changes. They're good feelings - you just need to make sure that who you pair up with also has those sorts of feelings, or else you'll be ripe for abuse.

No, That was being exceptionally benevolent with handling it. Regardless, reading it in a year will result in the same feeling as reading old Jr High material from school. You won't believe how utter stupid and wrapped up around a girl you got

Originally Posted by Ledgem

I always thought that "guy feeling like it's his own fault" for being rejected only happened to people like "us" (those who think too much, may be humble, etc.). Most guys either have or put up a show of having enough confidence that you could power a city with it - if a girl rejects him, then she either can't see how great he was or she was trash anyway (in the guy's opinion). It's a stereotype I've been exposed to, anyway - maybe you're from an area where sensitivity is a bit more readily available.

You know, this is kinda ironic about what you said above.

1. You either have confidence or you don't, There is no show. And being blunt, if your confidence is any less than powering a state, you're not confident enough
2. You can be disappointed or sad if she rejects you. Nothing stopping you, just don't breakdown because of it. The thing most people who lack confidence do is invest too much into a single girl. They make it out to be this big elaborate deal, and end up investing months of time and dreams into her before even taking her out once.
You want the blunt honest truth, There is not a girl out there worth more than 5minutes of your sadness. Because do you know how many dozens of wonderful girls out there you're missing while pouting over one. Why throw all your investments into one. I'm exaggerating on the time portion, but notion is true. Don't treat the girl like the "The One" which many guys who lack self confidence do. They come off creepy, desperate, and sound like a loser. If your feeling something for her, just ask her out. Want a trick? Give her your number and say call me. That means if she calls you, she's interested and if she doesn't then she's not. Simple, easy, done.
3. Help is always available. Want help? Talk to another guy, be friends with girls you don't want to ****(Illogical for me of course, ), or even bounce it off your own friends. The notion of keeping it in and hoping you don't get embarrassed...is just so ****ing High School The minute you get out of that **** hole, it's different. Why waste time worried about being embarrassed...so many cute girls and so little time.

It always comes back to my original point, stop treating **** so damn seriously. You'll have so much more fun and do so much more if you just go with the flow.