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Sakura_Kinomoto your story is like one that you read about or watch in drama-based fiction. I'm sorry that it happened to you. None of us except for you can really get a great feel for the situation; in my mind, it sounds like this Beau guy liked Jamie if she's spending a lot of time with him, and he did his best to get her away from you. The only advice I can really offer is one for future prevention of a similar issue happening, but this advice also applies to creating and maintaining a good relationship. I may have said it before in this thread, but I'll say it here:
Communication is essential in a relationship. Don't just nod and go on - say it to whoever you're with. Establish it as a sacred ground. I'd always known it, but the first girl I dated didn't communicate well with me and further, stated that I was a poor communicator. The relationship didn't last for much over a month. My current relationship is approaching the two year mark and is much more mature. Within the first week of serious dating, I told my girlfriend about how important it was to communicate, and how I wanted her to tell me if something was bothering her.
Girls, I know that the advice is that there are certain things that you don't tell your boyfriend. This varies from person to person and relationship to relationship, but that's total garbage. I understand that not every guy is a bastion of understanding, and there are some things that may scare him off or give him a bad impression of you. But if those sorts of things are going to happen, is the relationship really good and pure?
Open communication can be incredibly painful. I felt that I was taking a great risk in going over the sanctity of communication with my girlfriend, because you don't find many people saying things like that. I felt that perhaps she'd think that the relationship was getting too serious, or that by saying how it was important to communicate in order to overcome issues, I was saying that we'd have a lot of problems. I am incredibly lucky, as my girlfriend not only took all of that in, but she's been following it all this time. Even while crying over issues that bother her, she's talked it over with me and we were able to resolve them. Obviously it wasn't easy for her, and it wasn't always easy for me. But the open communication lets you resolve these problems and grow togther. Perhaps more importantly, it establishes trust. If someone came up to her and told her that I was only with her for sex, or because she cooks for me, she could easily cast the remark off because she knows many of my deeper thoughts, and she trusts that I don't keep things from her.
I don't have as moving a story as Shiemi, but I came to my conclusions about relationships and communication due to my parents' divorce. In short, perhaps there were personal incompatibilities, but neither of my parents communicated with each other. If you don't communicate, you can't fix what's bothering your partner. If you don't care to fix what's bothering them, or if what they want out of the relationship goes against what you want, then perhaps the relationship is doomed to fail.
Many people seem content to be in a relationship just for the hell of being in a relationship. If you want something serious, then it's important to establish communication. Finding out that there's an irrecoverable incompatibility can be pretty painful, and communicating openly will turn those up. I think it's better to find those out earlier than later, though. But people who would rather meet problems head-on than to live with problems in blissful ignorance seem rather rare these days...
Either way, Sakura_Kinomoto, it's not too late to recover your friendship and perhaps even your relationship. Talking openly and expressing your feelings tends to be rather difficult, but you should confront Jamie. You have a variety of things to talk about - ask her why she did what she did, tell her that you don't like the way that things between the two of you have become weird. If she'll be even semi-open with you, then you can clear away any misunderstandings that she may have. Don't go into this with an argumentative mentality, or as if you're preparing for a fight. Be open, and make your goal the truth - find out what Jamie heard and thought, and make it clear to her what you feel and think. Keep us updated, and good luck.
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