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Old 2007-11-18, 22:35   Link #181
Tri-ring
The Censor Bat
 
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Land of the rising sun
Quote:
Originally Posted by Loli Gurl View Post
Thanks for the advice.

Do I sense a hint of sarcasm in your reply?

There are actually three folds to this trick, one being obvious, creating an excuse but it is also to measure the other party if he is sincere and/or if he is actually taking notice of you.
The last is depending on the other person's intellectuality but if he is, your actually giving him a hinted invitation to him thus if he is interested he is opt to respond.
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Old 2007-11-19, 02:55   Link #182
ChibiMenos
Gillian-class Chibi
 
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Utah
Age: 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by Loli Gurl View Post
I hope everything works out for you ChibiMenos.
Heh, I'd forgotten about this thread and it hasn't even been that long since I posted.

Things are going very well so far... I did end up actually asking him directly whether he just liked me as a friend or what... luckily it turned out he feels the same way I do. So we've been spending a lot of time together lately...he's such a fun guy.

Of course, he's also managed to get me into playing World of Warcraft... <.< Oh well, I guess that was a risk I decided to take....
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Old 2007-11-19, 16:14   Link #183
Qwazar
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Wherever life takes me.
^ That was kind of ovbious, as a guy I can say, about that he wanted to be more than friends with you .

As a compliment I want to say that it can't get much awesomer than playing video games with your girlfriend. It is like combining the pleasant with... pleasant.

I, on the other hand am failing terribly i this field . I am terribly picky. REALLY REALLY picky. I might like one girl out of... a hundred? And I don't even mean spend-the-rest-of-my-life-with-you like. And if I do find one she is pretty much ages out of my league, or I just get really anti-social around her.
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Old 2007-11-19, 16:19   Link #184
Miko Miko
Imouto-Chan♥
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: England
Age: 20
There is a guy I REALLY like, have done for about 5 or 6 weeks now. But He is ALL i think about. He keeps looking at me and smiling. Were not in many classes together but when we are I try to talk to him. I feel so shy though >_<
Am I Normal?

Any advice?
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Old 2007-11-19, 17:52   Link #185
Tri-ring
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Land of the rising sun
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miko Miko View Post
There is a guy I REALLY like, have done for about 5 or 6 weeks now. But He is ALL i think about. He keeps looking at me and smiling. Were not in many classes together but when we are I try to talk to him. I feel so shy though >_<
Am I Normal?

Any advice?
Don't worry you're normal, it is a normal response from a person of your age in puberty.
You have to know why you react that way into remedy the situation.
What will you do/How would you feel, if he responds negatively?
What will you do/How would you feel, if the other peers responds negatively?
Nine of ten nothing will change.
Do you feel better?
Absolutely nothing will change if you do not stir up some courage but there is a 10 percent possibility that something will change if you do, which path you take is totally up to you.
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Old 2007-11-21, 05:08   Link #186
White_Summer
陽光宅男
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Korea Town, Los Angles California
Help! Trying to get a Girlfriend



Hey all!
This will be my first thread that I have created and I thought that I should based it on one of the bigger problems currently going on in my life. Currently I am single however I found a girl that I like. I am Korean and I learned English after coming to California and the girl I have come to like is from Taiwan and her English is not very good. She's been in America for less than a year. I thought we started on good terms and I built up the courage to confess and asked if we could date. She did not accept nor reject and instead stated that it's a difficult question to answer. We still continue to talk and are on good terms (I Think) however I'm getting the feeling that she wants to be friends more than boyfriend/girlfriend. I like her alot but I'm unsure on how to change her view from being a friend to a boyfriend does anybody have some advice they can offer?
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Old 2007-11-21, 15:28   Link #187
Marina
~La-la Land~
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Seattle
Age: 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by White_Summer View Post

Hey all!
This will be my first thread that I have created and I thought that I should based it on one of the bigger problems currently going on in my life. Currently I am single however I found a girl that I like. I am Korean and I learned English after coming to California and the girl I have come to like is from Taiwan and her English is not very good. She's been in America for less than a year. I thought we started on good terms and I built up the courage to confess and asked if we could date. She did not accept nor reject and instead stated that it's a difficult question to answer. We still continue to talk and are on good terms (I Think) however I'm getting the feeling that she wants to be friends more than boyfriend/girlfriend. I like her alot but I'm unsure on how to change her view from being a friend to a boyfriend does anybody have some advice they can offer?
Firstoff: you cannot change a person's view about being friends or more, that is a decision that only he/she can make. From what you've described, I agree that she sounds like she only wants to be friends for now, and I recommend that you respect that for the time being. Depending on how much you like this girl, if you are willing to wait for her to come around to your affections, then let her know that it's ok to just be friends, but that you want more and that you're willing to wait patiently. Not only will this assure her, but it will let her be friends w/ you without worrying that you'll try pushing things. Being her friend for now will also allow you to observe her closely: her likes and dislikes, what her family is like, etc. all important in deciding if you are compatible or not. Just be her friend, and at times show her how much of a catch you are by demonstrating how thoughtful and caring you can be at times. I'm sure if you are perfect for one another, then she will realize how wonderful you are; the key is to just be patient.
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Old 2007-11-21, 15:32   Link #188
Hotaru Suzume
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: 70 to your left.
Age: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by White_Summer View Post

Hey all!
This will be my first thread that I have created and I thought that I should based it on one of the bigger problems currently going on in my life. Currently I am single however I found a girl that I like. I am Korean and I learned English after coming to California and the girl I have come to like is from Taiwan and her English is not very good. She's been in America for less than a year. I thought we started on good terms and I built up the courage to confess and asked if we could date. She did not accept nor reject and instead stated that it's a difficult question to answer. We still continue to talk and are on good terms (I Think) however I'm getting the feeling that she wants to be friends more than boyfriend/girlfriend. I like her alot but I'm unsure on how to change her view from being a friend to a boyfriend does anybody have some advice they can offer?
Looks like your thread got merged with this one.

I think it'd be best stay friends for a while (around 6 months to a year? I don't exactly know), get to know a lot about each other first, earn her trust and all that stuff... Ask again later, I say.
Hope that helps.

Edit: Oh yes, there is always the chance that she might not be heterosexual... unless you've ascertained that she is, of course. :0
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Old 2007-11-21, 21:34   Link #189
Ledgem
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Age: 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hotaru Suzume View Post
I think it'd be best stay friends for a while (around 6 months to a year? I don't exactly know), get to know a lot about each other first, earn her trust and all that stuff... Ask again later, I say.
Hope that helps.
There is a sort of theory among males which states that once you meet a girl, you have a limited period of time before you are essentially tossed into the "friends box." In other words, once the period of time is up, the girl will only ever see you as a friend. You won't have a very good chance, if any chance at all, of ever being seen as more than that. The period of time depends on the girl and your circumstances.

There are exceptions, of course. However, I have asked a few girls (not a statistically relevant number for this to apply to most girls for certain) and they stated that it's more or less true - once they know you well enough, they make a decision in their mind and either sort you into an interest that could be elevated, or just friends.

It doesn't mean that you should give up on relationship hopes if you've known a girl for a long time. Just be aware of it.
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Old 2007-11-21, 22:36   Link #190
Darkman.exe213
Yurippe is mai waifu
 
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Me again, this time I just have a basic question. Is there a way to tell if a girl actually likes you as more than a friend? Thanks.
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Old 2007-11-22, 01:04   Link #191
Fome
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ledgem View Post
There is a sort of theory among males which states that once you meet a girl, you have a limited period of time before you are essentially tossed into the "friends box." In other words, once the period of time is up, the girl will only ever see you as a friend. You won't have a very good chance, if any chance at all, of ever being seen as more than that. The period of time depends on the girl and your circumstances.

There are exceptions, of course. However, I have asked a few girls (not a statistically relevant number for this to apply to most girls for certain) and they stated that it's more or less true - once they know you well enough, they make a decision in their mind and either sort you into an interest that could be elevated, or just friends.

It doesn't mean that you should give up on relationship hopes if you've known a girl for a long time. Just be aware of it.
I think it's also a cultural thing. My Japanese uncles tell me that relationships in Japan usually start off as friendship. The girl and boy hang around for a while, become good friends, and eventually become a couple. I was completely surprised to hear this at first, as it was completely contrary to prevailing American attitudes, but I feel like that the Japanese way makes more sense.
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Old 2007-11-22, 02:58   Link #192
Tri-ring
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fome View Post
I think it's also a cultural thing. My Japanese uncles tell me that relationships in Japan usually start off as friendship. The girl and boy hang around for a while, become good friends, and eventually become a couple. I was completely surprised to hear this at first, as it was completely contrary to prevailing American attitudes, but I feel like that the Japanese way makes more sense.
And then there is the freakin phrase "いいお友達でいましょうね"(Let's be good friends) as a response from a girl when you ask her to become steady with you. Which is a nice way in replying, I have no interest in dating you.

Last edited by Tri-ring; 2007-11-22 at 03:35.
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Old 2007-11-22, 05:30   Link #193
White_Summer
陽光宅男
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Korea Town, Los Angles California
Thanks for the advice,
I find that Fome's advice rings true but in most cases there kinda needs to be at least some physical attraction between the two people. But it also depends on the people's personality themselves of how some people get together.

But in Japan do people really say that phrase? " iiotomodachi..." I have to admit, it sounds lot better than a rejection along the lines of "I'm not interested, please leave me alone". At least you can still talk to that person. But still a rejection is still a rejection...
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Old 2007-11-22, 06:31   Link #194
Tri-ring
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Quote:
Originally Posted by White_Summer View Post
Thanks for the advice,
I find that Fome's advice rings true but in most cases there kinda needs to be at least some physical attraction between the two people. But it also depends on the people's personality themselves of how some people get together.

But in Japan do people really say that phrase? " iiotomodachi..." I have to admit, it sounds lot better than a rejection along the lines of "I'm not interested, please leave me alone". At least you can still talk to that person. But still a rejection is still a rejection...
I see you read Japanese, good for you.
Yup, that is the sweet sentence of death in Japan and it is worse than being flatly rejected since you still hold on to that slight sliver of hope that just maybe there is still a chance. (Actually no chance in hell since if there is a chance she will answer, "それでは友達からはじめましょう。" meaning let's start from friends and,,,)
There is another phrase, "私、XXさんみたいな人が好み" meaning "I like a person likeXX." Notice she never saying she like XX in person but placed preposition meaning she has no interest in XX himself.
Man, that line is another heart crusher.

Good luck to you however it turns out, and remember Bacchus will always will be your friend.

Last edited by Tri-ring; 2007-11-22 at 07:09.
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Old 2007-11-22, 09:26   Link #195
Whitemoon648
Sawa-Chan <3 <3 <3
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Quote:
Originally Posted by White_Summer View Post

Hey all!
This will be my first thread that I have created and I thought that I should based it on one of the bigger problems currently going on in my life. Currently I am single however I found a girl that I like. I am Korean and I learned English after coming to California and the girl I have come to like is from Taiwan and her English is not very good. She's been in America for less than a year. I thought we started on good terms and I built up the courage to confess and asked if we could date. She did not accept nor reject and instead stated that it's a difficult question to answer. We still continue to talk and are on good terms (I Think) however I'm getting the feeling that she wants to be friends more than boyfriend/girlfriend. I like her alot but I'm unsure on how to change her view from being a friend to a boyfriend does anybody have some advice they can offer?
I would give an advice, but you havent given us much info. Advices can vary based on many things. One example would be the age range.

IF you guys are :

12-14= Stay friends.

15-17 = She isnt a lost cause, just stay friends with her and ask her later. If you guys are really close she will say yes. in another word Just give her some time.

18-25 = She probably means it. Stay good friends and find another good girl friend for yourselve.

This is my personal advice based on age range, but there are many other things that you have to factor in.

Good luck.
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Old 2007-11-22, 09:59   Link #196
Knightmare213
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Join Date: Dec 2005
<Post Deleted by Me>

Last edited by Knightmare213; 2008-01-11 at 15:52.
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Old 2007-11-22, 18:55   Link #197
Hotaru Suzume
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: 70 to your left.
Age: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ledgem View Post
There is a sort of theory among males which states that once you meet a girl, you have a limited period of time before you are essentially tossed into the "friends box." In other words, once the period of time is up, the girl will only ever see you as a friend. You won't have a very good chance, if any chance at all, of ever being seen as more than that. The period of time depends on the girl and your circumstances.

There are exceptions, of course. However, I have asked a few girls (not a statistically relevant number for this to apply to most girls for certain) and they stated that it's more or less true - once they know you well enough, they make a decision in their mind and either sort you into an interest that could be elevated, or just friends.

It doesn't mean that you should give up on relationship hopes if you've known a girl for a long time. Just be aware of it.
Well that's certainly strange and amusing ... ... ... ... Wait, why are you telling me this? I'm not interested in getting into a relationship. I'm in one anyway. :0
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Old 2007-11-22, 21:40   Link #198
Ledgem
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Join Date: Mar 2003
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Age: 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hotaru Suzume View Post
Well that's certainly strange and amusing ... ... ... ... Wait, why are you telling me this? I'm not interested in getting into a relationship. I'm in one anyway. :0
It wasn't particularly directed at you, it was a response to what you stated. It was meant for anyone reading this thread.
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Old 2007-11-23, 04:55   Link #199
White_Summer
陽光宅男
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Korea Town, Los Angles California
If only everybody was good looking,
You know how in Anime you never see an overweight person... even the people who are antisocial or the outcast look normal and have no features that would merit being made fun of. I wonder what would happen if that applied in the real world as well. Open your school yearbook and you'll see that the percentage of good looking people is really quite low. However I guess it makes people more unique.
I don't really sound like it but I am already a university student so I guess the odds of this one working out are quite low... But I;ll keep at it, maybe luck with take a pleasant twist and I can look back on this and smile or laugh.
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Old 2007-11-23, 16:57   Link #200
Ledgem
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Quote:
Originally Posted by White_Summer View Post
If only everybody was good looking,
You know how in Anime you never see an overweight person... even the people who are antisocial or the outcast look normal and have no features that would merit being made fun of.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder - we all see different features as being more beautiful. Some people are attracted to others who are a bit plumper, while others get into the anorexic look. There is probably a certain set of features and styles that appeals to a majority, but there is no end-all. It's the same with anime, as well - different artists have different drawing styles, and not everyone finds each style attractive in the same way.

What I'm trying to say is, even if you feel that you're someone who isn't fawned over by members of the opposite (or similar) sex, everyone is different, and there's bound to be someone out there who will find you attractive and love you just the same.
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