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Old 2008-06-04, 21:03   Link #821
Comartemis
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Talking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post
*spreads some crack in here, too*

Spoiler for Battle Speech:


*RUNS LIKE HELL*
Oh ma dear lawd... I think I broke something from laughing too damn hard.
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Old 2008-06-04, 22:08   Link #822
Kha
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And this was my response to Eva's crack in the FF Thread:

Do the impossible!
See the invisible!
ROAR ROAR Fight the POWAA!

Touch the untouchable!
Breaker the unbreakable!
ROAR ROAR Fight the POWAA!

What you wanna do is whacha gotta do
Just, Breaker your way through and you'll make them see the truth.
Uh huh.
You'll see the power of Pink coming through baby.

ROAR ROAR Fight the POWAA!!!


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Old 2008-06-04, 22:52   Link #823
Comartemis
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I swear Kha, you mere presence can drive a man to completely khrack up.
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Old 2008-06-05, 00:07   Link #824
Comartemis
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Gah. Another double post. Oh well, time for the resident n00b to make an announcement.

*ahem*

Several months ago, I joined Outer Cadia with one goal in mind, and that was to have a good time making characters and coming up with storylines with people who held the same interest in the greatest of all magical girl shows as I did. And after a rough start and a few mishaps with the locals, I finally got around to making a few characters, which were (I thought) balanced.

For the record, I’m still not sure what’s wrong with Zero.

But after a short while I noticed a disturbing tendency I had, and that was to skip around way too much, jumping from idea to idea and storyline to storyline with no certain focus. Just recently, I realized one of the big reasons for this.

I hate the StrikerS layout. I would give anything to force 7Arcs to go back and make the girls stay out of the TSAB and do Season 3 differently, because the Ace’s association with the bureau limits their ability to be heroes; they have to follow the structure of the military, they have to wear those damnable limiters, and worst of all, they have to follow orders. Ugh.

Worse by far, however, was the treatment Hayate got, being turned into a glass cannon and relegated to a leadership role when we all thought she was going to be just as active as Nanoha and Fate. You’ve heard this all before, you probably share my opinions, so I’ll cut the rant short and get to the point.

I’m changing this.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I hereby give you my plans for my own answer to Kerokanon and REBUILT of StrikerS. I’m going back to the beginning and I’m doing things my way, putting the Magical Girl back into Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha. This is not a passing thing that I’ll abandon within a week or two, this is the story I’ve wanted to do since the beginning, and I’ll be damned if I let this project die out on me.

In addition to a few OCs to join the crew (including a new Ace, my answer to Keroko), significant changes will be made to the storyline following the A’s epilogue owing to the fact that Hayate is not a glass cannon and is therefore able to conduct missions on her own or with small amounts of assistance. This simple fact, with the added influence of the previously-mentioned OC, sets off a chain of events which culminates in a narrow avoidance of the Nanoha Incident thanks to the presence of Hayate on the battlefield with Nanoha and Vita.

Following this incident, which ends with a badly-wounded Hayate, Nanoha expresses a desire to personally hunt down the person responsible for Hayate’s injury, and derails her plans to become a combat instructor, leading her to join Hayate as a Special Investigator. As investigators, Hayate and Nanoha have all the freedom of movement that Acous displayed during StrikerS, able to go anywhere and do virtually anything to solve their cases. They are, in essence, the magical girl versions of James Bond and his ilk. Expect Acous and the disappearance of Zest’s team to feature prominently in the storyline, and the battle with Jail will take on a completely different tone as the girls hound him and the Numbers at every turn

This is but a brief description of the plans I have in mind for Hayatecanon, centering on the OC I mentioned earlier, one Alexander Crestwood.

Spoiler for Basic Background and Changes to A's:
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Old 2008-06-05, 00:09   Link #825
dkellis
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keroko View Post
I see more norse references. :3

And I see you're going to mess with Caro. That's going to be interesting, not many authors do that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
I don't think I've seen Caro play a major role in any fic... um ever.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Keroko View Post
Shows how much of an impact she made.
To be honest, I'm wondering about Caro's lack of action in fics.

I mean, here's a character who can boost her allies' abilities to disgusting levels, and she's a summoner, and she's a dragonrider, and she's a cute little girl. Is she just overshadowed or something?

For the purposes of Lyrical Melancholy, she's an obvious inclusion, because I needed a summoner whose kidnapping would bring down major retribution from the Aces.

In any case, added a few more entries in the timeline. Major spoilers for Lyrical Melancholy, to the point of pretty much summarizing the plot.
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Old 2008-06-05, 03:45   Link #826
haiz123321
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oO Did the original one get so overloaded with bluecheesium that it had to have a 2nd reincarnation? Are there any new terms created? XD
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Old 2008-06-05, 04:21   Link #827
Sheba
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dkellis View Post
I mean, here's a character who can boost her allies' abilities to disgusting levels, and she's a summoner, and she's a dragonrider, and she's a cute little girl. Is she just overshadowed or something?
Seven Arcs seems to have given up on developping erio and Caro the instant Vivio has entered the picture. And no, the previous sentence is not meant to hate on Vivio, but just pointing out the director's cast mismanagement that bring me memories of School Rumble Nigakki. So far, only anime in this decade that has pulled a tightly managed large cast is Baccano! That people should check out if they have not done it yet.

I mean, how one can not like this kind of style?
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Old 2008-06-05, 05:03   Link #828
Tk3997
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keroko View Post
True, but after the first few chapters I was expecting... dunno... human oponents.
Meh like I said this is the first real battle of the fic and a couple of the human antagonists do appear next chapter. Ya gotta have some build up though you know? I mean StrikerS didn’t even bother to show human enemies until what Ep.12 or something?

Anyway we're only on chapter three and frankly at the current rate I'm thinking this is going to be AT LEAST ten chaps. This fic is going to be epicly long winded if nothing else.

Quote:
Shows how much of an impact she made.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dkellis View Post
To be honest, I'm wondering about Caro's lack of action in fics.

I mean, here's a character who can boost her allies' abilities to disgusting levels, and she's a summoner, and she's a dragonrider, and she's a cute little girl. Is she just overshadowed or something?
I think the biggest problem is that she never really kicked ass herself yeah she summoned a big mean dragon, but when someone summons other stuff to do there work for them if the something they summon is too awesome the character themselves can get overshadowed by there subordinate. (I shall dub this Saber Syndrome..)

Quote:
If we did, don't you think we'd have torn into them by now?
Area of effect ranged spells are hardly note worthy it would take ALLOT for such a thing to raise many eyebrows.

Quote:
Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw View Post
Wait, he's still alive?!


Lucifer was never really alive to begin with being a presumably immortal (fallen) angel and all...

Quote:
Originally Posted by stormturmoil View Post
Yeah, He's still alive...

He ain't gonna be leading any legions eleventh dimensional demons out of hell any time soon, though....

Hild-Sama took care of That

remember, Hell hath no fury?... with Hild it's the worst of Both worlds...
Tch Lucifer is the OD he was corrupting souls and reveling in sin while that little upstart was still wetting diapers.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sheba View Post
Wrong, when the nine circles of Hell are on the loose, when despair has overwhelmed humans' hearts, well when everyone are royally screwed up, you call...

Spoiler for The badass undead-slaughtering demonassbeater:
Groovy...
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Old 2008-06-05, 05:52   Link #829
Kha
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Quote:
Originally Posted by haiz123321 View Post
oO Did the original one get so overloaded with bluecheesium that it had to have a 2nd reincarnation? Are there any new terms created? XD
Pretty much.

As for new terms, I believe that's Cadia Zwei...

*is glomped again*

...-_-\\\
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Old 2008-06-05, 06:42   Link #830
XenahortCharybdis
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Ack-hem.

I'm back. Sort of, again. And with something new, too...So without further ado, I would like to present to all present:

The ZENITH Project
~Act One, Scene One~

Spoiler for The First Part...:

Last edited by XenahortCharybdis; 2008-06-05 at 07:19.
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Old 2008-06-05, 06:44   Link #831
XenahortCharybdis
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Ahem, Double Post. Sorry, AS really didn't like the length of my post

The ZENITH Project
~Act One, Scene One~

Spoiler for ...And the Second Part:


I'm gonna wait till someone else posts before posting my major(-ly delayed) backlog breaker, just to avoid a triple post.

*hangs his head for FA to smack it*

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Old 2008-06-05, 06:54   Link #832
Sheba
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Quote:

I hate the StrikerS layout. I would give anything to force 7Arcs to go back and make the girls stay out of the TSAB
So basically Fate and Hayate should have left TSAB as soon as their probation time is done? You are expecting a paramilitary organization to let go such powerful mages and not worry about them going rogue?
Quote:
and do Season 3 differently, because the Ace’s association with the bureau limits their ability to be heroes; they have to follow the structure of the military,
The bureau is not a limit, it broadened the scope beyond "CTHULUH AWAKENED FROM HIS SLEEP ARE U BAD MAGICAL GIRL ENOUGH TO SAVE HUMANKIND". Instead of more powerful enemies that goes in the realm of universe destroyers, TSAB would deal with corrupt officials (something like in The Shield), infiltrated criminals (a la Infernal Affairs) or agents who have gone rogues (like in Apocalypse Now).

Quote:
they have to wear those damnable limiters,
A device that made sense when you see that glimpse about Nanoha's past but poorly executed by 7Arcs.

World destroying powers should come with a price, always, both psychological and physical. Otherwise, the writer who handle an universe destroying device or power to a lead character is a dumbass.

Quote:
and worst of all, they have to follow orders. Ugh.
This is actually meat and bone for drama. American and europeans audiovisual works has dozens of powerful stories involving orders that are questionable.
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Old 2008-06-05, 06:55   Link #833
Keroko
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Originally Posted by Comartemis View Post
Just making sure.

For the record, the only changes being implemented into the final version are the addition of a new spell with grenade-launcher properties and a five-second charge time, and the toning-down of Barret Shell's explosive power to approximately the level of incendiary rounds or somewhere below the level of a Swallow Flier.

Once I post Rex's final revision I'll be getting to work on my next project, Operation De-Shaft Hayate, and an OC strongly related to said project.

Spoiler for Meet my unnamed Steel Mage. For real, this time.:


Wish me luck.
Hmmm certainly looks cool.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post
*spreads some crack in here, too*

Spoiler for Battle Speech:


*RUNS LIKE HELL*
Yeah... the facepalm was needed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Comartemis View Post
For the record, I’m still not sure what’s wrong with Zero.
Could you re-link his profile?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Comartemis View Post
I hate the StrikerS layout. I would give anything to force 7Arcs to go back and make the girls stay out of the TSAB and do Season 3 differently, because the Ace’s association with the bureau limits their ability to be heroes; they have to follow the structure of the military, they have to wear those damnable limiters, and worst of all, they have to follow orders. Ugh.
They followed orders ever since S1 though. Admitidly the millitary geeks here have places far more restraint on the cast then what we are seen in the show.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Comartemis View Post
Just prior to the final battle and the awakening of the BoD, Alex is spotted by Chrono while out in public, and the two engage in a running cat-and-mouse game through the city while under one of Chrono’s barriers. Finally, Alex breaks the barrier by beating Chrono to within an inch of his life. The barrier drops just in time for Alex and Chrono to get telepathic calls for help from their respective groups. They arrive at the hospital just in time to see Hayate activate the BoD.
One point of critic here though: He goes from getting his ass handed to him by Chrono to beating Chrono within an inch of his life in that short a period? That's a bit too much shounen powerboost, don't you think? Even Nanoha and Fate only went from 'being outgunned' to 'equal match' and that was due to the difference in their devices, and with the Wolkies holding back. I would personally find it more believable if Alex had an equall fight with Chrono.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Comartemis View Post
Through a sequence I’m still working out in my head, Hayate and Alex meet up in their shared dreamworld, as they both desire to live happily together with each other, their friends, and the Wolkenritter. Together, they break out of Reinforce’s dreamworld and Hayate reassumes control over the book. The final showdown goes just as it should, and Reinforce fades away. The only difference here is that Hayate’s vast amounts of power do not interfere with her ability to use that power, though she needs training to perfect her control over the spells she borrowed from everyone.
.... concidering this is your own private timeline, I have zero say in this, but as an inserter I don't really like this. The focuss of the scene was Hayate's power, and Hayate's strength. Now it looks as if she needed someone else before she could break free.

Quote:
Originally Posted by dkellis View Post
To be honest, I'm wondering about Caro's lack of action in fics.

I mean, here's a character who can boost her allies' abilities to disgusting levels, and she's a summoner, and she's a dragonrider, and she's a cute little girl. Is she just overshadowed or something?
Well, like Tk said, she never does anything herself, which almost erases her presence.

I mean, all she really does apart from summoning dragons is cast a random boost spell here and there to make other people look awesome, and those spells don't even look that flashy. Yuuno is a support mage, but managed to look awesome becaus he threw himself in the midle of a battle. Heck, even Shamal, who's role is smaller then Caro manages to look far superior.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Meh like I said this is the first real battle of the fic and a couple of the human antagonists do appear next chapter. Ya gotta have some build up though you know? I mean StrikerS didn’t even bother to show human enemies until what Ep.12 or something?

Anyway we're only on chapter three and frankly at the current rate I'm thinking this is going to be AT LEAST ten chaps. This fic is going to be epicly long winded if nothing else.
I'll wait and read before drawing conclusions, then.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
I think the biggest problem is that she never really kicked ass herself yeah she summoned a big mean dragon, but when someone summons other stuff to do there work for them if the something they summon is too awesome the character themselves can get overshadowed by there subordinate. (I shall dub this Saber Syndrome..)
In Shiro's defence, he was at least doing something. When Saber was off fighting Gil, he was fighing his own battle. Or -if you've read UBW- fighting the Big Bad himself!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Tch Lucifer is the OD he was corrupting souls and reveling in sin while that little upstart was still wetting diapers.

Groovy...
Concidering that AMG wise Hild is to hell what God is to heaven (one could say she is Lucifer, in a way)... doubtfull. But then, comparing these two is useless because Lucifer is an Angel, which in the AMG-verse means there would have been a god/dess involved too.

Too much difference in the worlds to compare these two.
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Old 2008-06-05, 07:27   Link #834
haiz123321
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Originally Posted by Kha View Post
Pretty much.

As for new terms, I believe that's Cadia Zwei...

*is glomped again*

...-_-\\\
Cadia Zwei = ?
and it seems that everyone pretty much changed their sigs avatars
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Old 2008-06-05, 08:15   Link #835
Keroko
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Quote:
Originally Posted by XenahortCharybdis View Post
Ack-hem.

I'm back. Sort of, again. And with something new, too...So without further ado, I would like to present to all present:

The ZENITH Project
~Act One, Scene One~

Spoiler for The First Part...:
Quote:
Originally Posted by XenahortCharybdis View Post
Ahem, Double Post. Sorry, AS really didn't like the length of my post

The ZENITH Project
~Act One, Scene One~

Spoiler for ...And the Second Part:


I'm gonna wait till someone else posts before posting my major(-ly delayed) backlog breaker, just to avoid a triple post.

*hangs his head for FA to smack it*

Woot! Acous apears! That certainly was a welcome surprise, we don't get to see much of Acous around here (I really wish StrikerS had done more with him).

And the Greek... Negima influence? (<-- Chao fan)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sheba View Post
The bureau is not a limit, it broadened the scope beyond "CTHULUH AWAKENED FROM HIS SLEEP ARE U BAD MAGICAL GIRL ENOUGH TO SAVE HUMANKIND". Instead of more powerful enemies that goes in the realm of universe destroyers, TSAB would deal with corrupt officials (something like in The Shield), infiltrated criminals (a la Infernal Affairs) or agents who have gone rogues (like in Apocalypse Now).
Seconded, I rather like the change from generic magical girl series to something more original

Quote:
Originally Posted by haiz123321 View Post
Cadia Zwei = ?
and it seems that everyone pretty much changed their sigs avatars
Like how Reinforce has Reinforce Zwei, we have Cadia Zwei. And like Rein, she's small and adorable.
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Old 2008-06-05, 09:03   Link #836
Comartemis
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One point of critic here though: He goes from getting his ass handed to him by Chrono to beating Chrono within an inch of his life in that short a period? That's a bit too much shounen powerboost, don't you think? Even Nanoha and Fate only went from 'being outgunned' to 'equal match' and that was due to the difference in their devices, and with the Wolkies holding back. I would personally find it more believable if Alex had an equall fight with Chrono.
This is more a case of superior tactics and knowing the layout of the city better than Chrono does. During the initial engagement in episode five, Chrono smacks Alex around because the environment is open air, where Chrono can use his superior mobility and arsenal of ranged attacks to bring Alex to his knees, while Alex is struggling to get a flight spell working. A month later, he's got that flight spell working just fine, but he also lures Chrono into engaging him in enclosed areas where his vastly superior melee skills are of the greatest use.

Quote:
.... concidering this is your own private timeline, I have zero say in this, but as an inserter I don't really like this. The focuss of the scene was Hayate's power, and Hayate's strength. Now it looks as if she needed someone else before she could break free.
Good point, this might just shaft Hayate even further if I leave it the way it is. I'll work on this a bit more and get back to it.

Quote:
Could you re-link his profile?
If I can find it in 300+ pages of backlog, yeah.

Quote:
Seconded, I rather like the change from generic magical girl series to something more original
Well I didn't, not in the slightest. My take on StrikerS is going to have minimal amounts of interference from the higher-ups. I compared the SIs to James Bond, and that's pretty much what the girls are going to be doing, complete with a License to Kill. They get assigned (or select on their own) a case relating to JS, and they follow it through to the conclusion, crossing blades with Zest, Lutecia, the Numbers, and hoards and hoards of gadgets, but at no point will you see them dedicating multiple chapters to training a bunch of green recruits or dealing with Regius's political bullshit. That last one in particular is getting completely axed. The Forwards may appear in some other context, i.e. Subaru and Teana show up as a couple of GF mages working on a crime scene, but don't expect Erio and Caro to get more than a passing mention from Fate.

Quote:
Woot! Acous apears! That certainly was a welcome surprise, we don't get to see much of Acous around here (I really wish StrikerS had done more with him).
Count on him showing up more often in my fanon to make up for the missing Forwards.
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Old 2008-06-05, 09:28   Link #837
Keroko
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Originally Posted by Comartemis View Post
This is more a case of superior tactics and knowing the layout of the city better than Chrono does. During the initial engagement in episode five, Chrono smacks Alex around because the environment is open air, where Chrono can use his superior mobility and arsenal of ranged attacks to bring Alex to his knees, while Alex is struggling to get a flight spell working. A month later, he's got that flight spell working just fine, but he also lures Chrono into engaging him in enclosed areas where his vastly superior melee skills are of the greatest use.
When I read this, the first thing that came to my mind was 'Superior tactics? Against Chrono?'

I know you have somewhat of a... low respect for most of the male members of the cast, but during A's Chrono is the biggest tactical mind our heroes have, barring Lindy. That said, simply luring him into a field of advantage should not make Chrono get beaten within an inch of his life. As smart as he is, he would realize his disadvantage in melee and simply retreat. Remember: Chrono was able to defeat Fate, a melee specialist. And by the looks of it without excessive trouble too. Even though that was prior to Bardiche's upgrade, it shows that Chrono is no slouch when it comes to melee combat.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Comartemis View Post
If I can find it in 300+ pages of backlog, yeah.
That's why I asked.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Comartemis View Post
Well I didn't, not in the slightest. My take on StrikerS is going to have minimal amounts of interference from the higher-ups. I compared the SIs to James Bond, and that's pretty much what the girls are going to be doing, complete with a License to Kill. They get assigned (or select on their own) a case relating to JS, and they follow it through to the conclusion, crossing blades with Zest, Lutecia, the Numbers, and hoards and hoards of gadgets, but at no point will you see them dedicating multiple chapters to training a bunch of green recruits or dealing with Regius's political bullshit. That last one in particular is getting completely axed. The Forwards may appear in some other context, i.e. Subaru and Teana show up as a couple of GF mages working on a crime scene, but don't expect Erio and Caro to get more than a passing mention from Fate.
Heh. You might want to rephrase the License to Kill part. You make it sound as if the cast is going to butcher and blow up anything in their path.

Though its strange... you say you're going to axe Regius and his doings, yet you also say you're going to prominently feature Zest and Lutecia, even though these two hold very strong connections to Regius and his doings, particularely Zest.
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Old 2008-06-05, 09:40   Link #838
Wild Goose
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Translation Keroko: Comar hasn't fully finished thinking things out. As opposed to say a military otaku like me, where my crack is tactically sound and makes sense.

...well there was the time I was postulating making micromissile launcher CFTs....

Anyway after much thought I'm srapping Diverted Tangent, simply because it's pointless crack. Likewise Joint Training; I MAY at some point get off my ass and rewrite Chapter 1 (god knows it and Chapter 2 are pretty much non-canon already), and I need to write the following scenes which will be referred to in Alpha in passing:

1) Franz vs Subaru & Teana ended in him beating both, though Subaru broke Magnum in the process, and he won vs Tea due to being able to move faster than her, which basically meant that she fired Barrtt F at him, he tossed flares and bumrushed her and body-checked her into the ground. Franz vs Subaru was filled with lots more Hot blood however.

2) Emili vs Signum. Wasn't pretty.

3) Franz vs Nanoha rematch called off due to events of PT is Lotsa Fun.

4) Franz vs Vita. In which Franz broke Cortana on Graf Eisen, but he managed to take Vita out despite Eisen managing to defend more or less sucessfully against Giga Drill Breaker. In the wake of this, Vita begins work on a new spell.

Oh, and since she was completely broken, Cortana insisted on being transferred to Chief's armor and refused to have anything to do with Franz anymore.

5) The Final Battle. One Big Massive Brawl. Ending in four words: "JET MAGNUM!" "Starlight Breaker."[/i]

6) Franz/Naomi waffbonding.

7) [Franz has pwned Vita. Franz has mastered Shooting Juice Up Nose. Franz is now the Vita Master.]

8) "I've had worse. But not by much," said Ivanovich, grimacing at the taste of Shamal's health drink. Chief merely looked at him.
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Old 2008-06-05, 09:47   Link #839
Keroko
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Originally Posted by Wild Goose View Post
Translation Keroko: Comar hasn't fully finished thinking things out. As opposed to say a military otaku like me, where my crack is tactically sound and makes sense.
I'm well aware that Comar hasn't finished thinking things out, and what he has is little more then a rough draft. That's why I'm helping his straighten things out before he starts writing, rather then afterwards. I believe we did the oposite once, and Dkellis wasn't exactly happy about it.

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7) [Franz has pwned Vita. Franz has mastered Shooting Juice Up Nose. Franz is now the Vita Master.]
And hospitalized.

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Originally Posted by Wild Goose View Post
8) "I've had worse. But not by much," said Ivanovich, grimacing at the taste of Shamal's health drink. Chief merely looked at him.
Shamal's health drinks arent the one you need to worry about...
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Old 2008-06-05, 09:49   Link #840
haiz123321
Obey me world!
 
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
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Originally Posted by Keroko View Post
Like how Reinforce has Reinforce Zwei, we have Cadia Zwei. And like Rein, she's small and adorable.
Oh, profile link pls XD
Actually by new terms i was talking about sth like Bluecheesium/Ion Canon XD Speaking of it, did it claim any victims lately?
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