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Old 2008-10-13, 18:54   Link #9921
Evangelion Xgouki
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And the polls are now closed :3

The final count for Divided Destiny:

A) IIII
B)
C) III

I heard taking a walk is a good way to clear your thoughts...
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Old 2008-10-13, 19:23   Link #9922
RadiantBeam
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...

I just saw the Lyrical Toybox promo, the original concept for Nanoha.

...

I feel inspired.
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Old 2008-10-13, 20:31   Link #9923
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Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
WHOO!

... *cough*

Anyway, here's one of them, however I only have the bare bones of it and some outlines of character relationships. This one is set post A's after Nanoha is injured, but with a different ending. Basically, in my version she still recovers but her body is so fragile from the trauma and the bloodloss that she can never fly again and she can never use magic; or she can, but it won't take much to push her over the edge and cause her body to collapse again, and if she fails a second time there's no sure bet they can save her.

Nanoha then expresses an interest (or an urge) to try and learn swordfighting like Kyouya and Miyuki, but again, her body is too fragile for it as swordfighting is mainly hand-to-hand combat and... well, yeah, she can't handle a lot of hits. In an attempt to help their daughter the Takamachi family send her to England where she is taken in by two childhood friends of Miyuki and Kyouya, Fiasse Crystera and Elise McGaren. Nanoha herself is taken in by Elise and trained in gun fighting, and the two live on as Fiasse's bodyguards.

Fast foward six years later (like A's). Nanoha is fifteen and quite happy, especially that Fiasse, despite dangerous conditions forcing her to do so, has hired Kyouya and Miyuki to help guard her as she is being attacked by an unseen enemy. However, this enemy has also attracted the attention of the Administration, and Nanoha never told anyone where she was going... thus setting her on a crash course with friends she hasn't seen in six years.

I'm aware of some plotholes and trying to figure them out right now. Also, yes, Fiasse is from the Triangle Heart game; Elise is a character from the OVA. I tweaked their backgrounds and whatnot a bit for the story, but here's what I have for them:

Elise: A serious, quiet woman the same age as Kyouya and Fiasse's bodyguard. She took Nanoha in and has been watching over her ever since. Despite her serious personality and strict rules she is in fact very loving to Nanoha and views her as a younger sister; when Nanoha was younger they used to go on motorcyle rides together to mimic the feeling of flying, though now Nanoha is old enough to do it herself. Elise is extremely protective of her friends and holds a special contempt for the Administration and magic in general; it is later revealed that as a child she was used in an experiment to create an "artifical mage" before the events of Project Fate. However, the idea backfired when Elise couldn't handle the overload of magic in her body and went beserk, attacking anything that moved and killing several people in the process. To this day she still harbors the magic in her body, though she keeps it severely under check. (This is a 'magical' spin on her original past in Triangle Heart, where she was responsible for the death of Nanoha's father)

Fiasse: A kind young woman who is only a few years older than Kyouya and principal of Crystera Music School in her mother's stead; however, she in in truth a mage and one of the last in an ancient line to use songs and chants to activate her attacks. Her device, Sweet Song, bears the form of a cross that she wears around her neck (I haven't figured out its final form yet, nor whether it's male or female; I know it calls her 'ma'am' and that's about it). Her attacks are mainly wind-based and vary in strength depending on how long the activation song/chant is; the longer the song, the more powerful and complex the attack. She has many of the shorter songs memorized, while the longer songs flow through her head naturally when she needs them most. It is speculated that this mystery person is targeting her because of the "forgotten song" of her kind; a song said to be capable of bringing back the dead and reversing time itself.

...

And that's it for the first one. Thoughts? Comments? Critiques?
Well, same with everyone else, DO IT! Can Kyouya and Miyuki be super bad ass? They got no love in MGLN. Glad to see some Triangle heart characters.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
I'm not sure where this came from, but I like it. A short on Vivio's first night sleeping alone in Nanoha and Fate's house.

Spoiler for Sleep:


EDIT:@ RadiantBeam: Best of luck writing, don't hold back due to uncertainty! We'll all be happy to give advice and suggestions so lay'm out ^^

Also, be sure to check out our chatroom, the link is under my signature ^^
Awww, Vivio's so cute. Yay for WAFF.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
A lot of people have done something or another about Nanoha when she was injured and hospitalized... But I wanted to do something slightly different. Not through Nanoha's eyes, but through Fate's. How she felt during this time, how she reacted....

I like this one, I hope you enjoy it too ^_^

Spoiler for Don't stop:
Ooh, very nice. It was pretty interesting to have Fate slap her, but thinking about it, I could see Fate acting like this.

@New people: Welcome! All the help and fun you could need in under Satashi's sig.
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Old 2008-10-13, 20:54   Link #9924
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Quote:
Originally Posted by markesellus View Post
Well, same with everyone else, DO IT! Can Kyouya and Miyuki be super bad ass? They got no love in MGLN. Glad to see some Triangle heart characters.
After watching the OVA I have to say YES, Miyuki and Kyouya are very capable of being super bad ass. It's a pity they got shafted in MGLN, though it's understandable given they weren't major characters.

Another reason why I want to do this. More love for Miyukui and Kyouya, 'cuase they don't get enough.
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Old 2008-10-13, 21:13   Link #9925
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
After watching the OVA I have to say YES, Miyuki and Kyouya are very capable of being super bad ass. It's a pity they got shafted in MGLN, though it's understandable given they weren't major characters.

Another reason why I want to do this. More love for Miyukui and Kyouya, 'cuase they don't get enough.
Please do it~ we need more minor character love in the world.
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Old 2008-10-14, 02:16   Link #9926
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We also need more kyoudai-ai in this world. While I like Kyouya/Shinobu, I prefer Kyouya with Miyuki.

And then we can have a real triangle of kyouda-ai as well~
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Old 2008-10-14, 04:45   Link #9927
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...

*strangles Goose*

*resumes Hiatus*
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Old 2008-10-14, 05:29   Link #9928
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wild Goose View Post
We also need more kyoudai-ai in this world. While I like Kyouya/Shinobu, I prefer Kyouya with Miyuki.

And then we can have a real triangle of kyouda-ai as well~
Actually, in the Triangle Heart OVA Elise had a crush on Kyouya as a kid. XD

I'd try my hand at Miyuki/Kyouya if only because according to Triangle Heart Miyuki is actually Nanoha's cousin and not her sister, but I don't know if the creators of MGLN changed it so she was actually Nanoha's sister since no one would know her past from Triangle Heart.

It would be awesome for angst, in any case.
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Old 2008-10-14, 12:20   Link #9929
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
A lot of people have done something or another about Nanoha when she was injured and hospitalized... But I wanted to do something slightly different. Not through Nanoha's eyes, but through Fate's. How she felt during this time, how she reacted....

I like this one, I hope you enjoy it too ^_^

Spoiler for Don't stop:
Its very nice your expresion on Fate's feelings, I really love your way to descrive the emotions of the characters, nice job as always

@RadiantBeam: I never read the original Triangle Heart so I'm not familiarisated with the characters of that manga, but your idea looks quite interesting

Keep going! XD
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Old 2008-10-14, 12:52   Link #9930
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Well, lots of requesting for Hayate and Fate in a relationship, so here's something I did for everyone.

WARNING: This is Fate x Hayate! Don't read if you don't like it!

Spoiler for Hayate x Fate:
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Old 2008-10-14, 13:32   Link #9931
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Hey, Satashi, I was wondering... are you planing to continue "Just a little help..."? We haven't see you around here so much recently, and I haven't talked with you either so I don't know if something happened to you and that's because you are less active now =/ and even if it was to deliver a yuunoha, it's good to see you here now.

I loved the Fate of "Just a little help...", those Freudian slips were priceless, and I'm sure your other readers liked it too, so I hope that you can keep writing it ^^

Cuídate y sigue sonriendo
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Old 2008-10-14, 15:10   Link #9932
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BPHaru View Post
Hey, Satashi, I was wondering... are you planing to continue "Just a little help..."? We haven't see you around here so much recently, and I haven't talked with you either so I don't know if something happened to you and that's because you are less active now =/ and even if it was to deliver a yuunoha, it's good to see you here now.

I loved the Fate of "Just a little help...", those Freudian slips were priceless, and I'm sure your other readers liked it too, so I hope that you can keep writing it ^^

Cuídate y sigue sonriendo
Work and one other thing:

I'm going back to college ^_^

Lately I've been doing the research thing for different colleges, and I was also sick in bed for almost an entire week with the flu or something O.< But now I have everything taken care of, I should be back to my shorts and stuff.

And that wasn't a Yuunoha, it was a...Hayate + Fate = Hayate @.@ um..... Fate + Hayate = Fayate? ^.^;;;

As for "Just a little help", if you can point me to the last installment, I'll write some of it tomorrow during my breaks ^^
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Old 2008-10-14, 15:41   Link #9933
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Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
As for "Just a little help", if you can point me to the last installment, I'll write some of it tomorrow during my breaks ^^
Nice, that would be great!

IIRC you wrote the first 2 parts:
Just a little help... (Part 1)
Just a little help... please? (Part 2)

Also, good luck with college. Enjoy it ^^

Cuídate y sigue sorniendo
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Old 2008-10-14, 17:15   Link #9934
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Erm, just a general question..

How many familiars can one mage have?

I'm trying to create some familiars for my AU idea, but for the life of me I'm not sure of just how many one mage can create and maintain with their own magic alone. I know Gil Graham had the twins and technically the knights are all Hayate's familiars (or similar, but they get most of their magic from the Book), but is there a limit to how many familiars a mage can successfully create and maintain?

When I ask this, I ask it in reference to a mage that's about as strong as Precia Testarossa.
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Old 2008-10-14, 17:21   Link #9935
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In canon there isn't a maximum familiars set. But one thing is sure. A familiar eats his master ( the mage ) magic, meaning the more familiar a mage has, the "weaker" the mage will be.
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Old 2008-10-14, 17:23   Link #9936
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Thus, a stronger mage (Precia) can sustain a larger number of familiars, while still being pretty strong in combat.
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Old 2008-10-14, 17:35   Link #9937
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
Well, lots of requesting for Hayate and Fate in a relationship, so here's something I did for everyone.

WARNING: This is Fate x Hayate! Don't read if you don't like it!

Spoiler for Hayate x Fate:
Yay thank you Satashi*hugs* the world needs more And congrats and good luck on the going back to college thing
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Old 2008-10-14, 18:10   Link #9938
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@PhoenixG and AtomicoX

Thanks. I figured someone like Precia would be able to sustain a large number of familiars and still be a formidable opponent, but I wasn't totally sure. And the show never really gives us a limit for how many familiars a mage can have, so it's all up in the air.

Two or three seems like a good number.

Thanks again.
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Old 2008-10-14, 18:27   Link #9939
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
@PhoenixG and AtomicoX

Thanks. I figured someone like Precia would be able to sustain a large number of familiars and still be a formidable opponent, but I wasn't totally sure. And the show never really gives us a limit for how many familiars a mage can have, so it's all up in the air.

Two or three seems like a good number.

Thanks again.

Looking at it from a differnt angel, in the manga "Negima!", the main mage was able to support a lot of people with his own magic without feeling a real drain as long as they weren't using his powers activly.

To refer that to Nanoha, Arf changes her forms to be "less of a drain on Fate", going from human to wolf to puppy to child. The question is, is Arf just as strong in her child form as she is her adult form? I think the answer is "she is as strong as she wants to be, up to the level that Fate is. The more power she draws from Fate, the stronger she gets magically, but the weaker Fate gets magically."

So one person having, say, ten familiars, wouldn't drain a decent mage as long as they're not activly using powers, but if they do, the mage would suffer greatly in their power.

I think the point I'm getting at is, make sure you balance the power between familiar and mage to make it reasonable :3

......my two cents.
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Old 2008-10-14, 18:27   Link #9940
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
Looking at it from a differnt angel, in the manga "Negima!", the main mage was able to support a lot of people with his own magic without feeling a real drain as long as they weren't using his powers activly.

To refer that to Nanoha, Arf changes her forms to be "less of a drain on Fate", going from human to wolf to puppy to child. The question is, is Arf just as strong in her child form as she is her adult form? I think the answer is "she is as strong as she wants to be, up to the level that Fate is. The more power she draws from Fate, the stronger she gets magically, but the weaker Fate gets magically."

So one person having, say, ten familiars, wouldn't drain a decent mage as long as they're not activly using powers, but if they do, the mage would suffer greatly in their power.

I think the point I'm getting at is, make sure you balance the power between familiar and mage to make it reasonable :3

......my two cents.
M'kay, that makes sense.

Thanks, Satashi. :3
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