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Old 2008-11-27, 13:42   Link #1021
Narona
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ledgem View Post
Many pretty girls do have a brain and are intelligent. The trouble is that when they're very pretty they're treated differently by those around them. In many ways they're indoctrinated into a sub-society where pretty girls are the norm and not one of them is valued for their personality or their intelligence. If they ever accept that sort of scenario and become comfortable with it then they are changed by it and will conform to how those types of girls behave. Those are my observations, anyway. Exceptions exist, but I'd imagine that it's more due to the environment that the girl is in.
From what I can personally tell, about here where I live. Pretty girls who are nice, and live a normal life exist. The only problem is that more men try to pick them up. In some cases in can become really annoying. But in comparison to the % of pretty girls, at least half of them have a very normal life.

And about the other girls, it doesn't mean that the normal girls have all a normal life. In fact, I don't see a real difference between the normal and pretty girls. Some of them from both side have a normal life, and some of them have different life, in some VIP worlds for example.

I will be kinda harsh about the other half, but if they accept to become part of a sub-society without thinking about it and what could happen, then they are not so intelligent in my eyes, or they choose that because they really want to do be part of it. But since it's not my life, I never said anything to that kind of girls. I just avoid them.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Segata View Post
A few are even more bitchy that the one Edgewalker is talking about but hey I agree with you nevertheless cos I know what you mean and so I can confirm it.
Yeah, I guess you're joking because my post was not clear enough, but yeah you're right, girls more Evil than that alo exist.

And I didn't mean anything. I just wanted to warn the people to not generalize about the pretty girls.

Last edited by Narona; 2008-11-27 at 13:56.
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Old 2008-11-27, 14:36   Link #1022
Segata
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Narona View Post
Yeah, I guess you're joking because my post was not clear enough, but yeah you're right, girls more Evil than that alo exist.

And I didn't mean anything. I just wanted to warn the people to not generalize about the pretty girls.
On the contrary very nice girls exist too What a very obvious statement

Are you angry at me? I apologize if I said something not good
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Old 2008-11-27, 15:02   Link #1023
Edgewalker
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ledgem View Post

Many pretty girls do have a brain and are intelligent. The trouble is that when they're very pretty they're treated differently by those around them. In many ways they're indoctrinated into a sub-society where pretty girls are the norm and not one of them is valued for their personality or their intelligence. If they ever accept that sort of scenario and become comfortable with it then they are changed by it and will conform to how those types of girls behave. Those are my observations, anyway. Exceptions exist, but I'd imagine that it's more due to the environment that the girl is in.
I will add something I've learned to this: Intellect doesn't really matter much at all, its how you use your intellect that counts. A person who is a member of mensa and has an IQ over 150 but uses it to try and prove that bigfoot is an multidimensional being by circling out blobs on blurry photographs is no different or more useful then the next wackjob. ( And yes, there really is a mensa member that does that. )

The same thing carries over to the typical above average looking person ( this goes for both male and female ). A gorgeous looking individual has just as much a chance to be a genius as the next person, the problem comes when they start allowing the way the world treats them to get to their head. They start thinking the outside matters more, and thus they start using whats on the inside less. This is the real reason pretty people are stereotyped as being dumber then everyone else - its not so much that they are actually stupid, they just don't use their brains because they don't need to in order to have a place in society. Sad, but that's how it is. In the case that you do meet a person who is both pretty and appears to be smart, most of the time they will also have a very introverted personality to go with it.
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Old 2008-11-27, 15:47   Link #1024
Wing Zero
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I believe marriage is not as important as before and is more of a joke really. Due to the divorce rates, theres an increase in lone parent family's out there in society. I think the divorce rates increased due to secularization, people don't believe in religion no more to carry on with there marriage like in the past.

Oaths and vows are seen very pointless and the commitment is not valued anymore, as the values change then theres bound to be more divorces, then later on the male or female will marry someone else again to only get divorced. There is also an argument that the wedding is an enjoyable time, that both genders love to be in such a position that they which to repeat such an occasion. this leads me to conclude that true love is hard to find but there are people I know who have been with there loved ones for ages. This leads me to think that dating is almost the same but at a smaller level.
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Old 2008-11-27, 16:07   Link #1025
Xvoki
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wing Zero View Post
I believe marriage is not as important as before and is more of a joke really. Due to the divorce rates, theres an increase in lone parent family's out there in society. I think the divorce rates increased due to secularization, people don't believe in religion no more to carry on with there marriage like in the past.
My girlfriend and I are getting married next year, and neither of us are religious, its more of a symbolic thing. As for divorce, couples with children break up all the time, even non-married ones.
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Old 2009-02-27, 09:53   Link #1026
Scorrere
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Getting a girlfriend?

I'm 19, college freshman, and I've never had a girlfriend (or kissed a girl for that matter). I've never been on a date and only ever approached one girl (obviously rejected). I'm not great-looking but not bad looking either. Girls call me "cute" but I think they mean in a more "Awww I wanna hug him!" way rather than actually being physically attracted to me. I have a good sense of humor and I'm nice to everyone but I'm also not a pushover and will refuse to do certain things for people. I have many female friends at school, but I just can never seem to get beyond the friends stage. It seems like all the girls want to be my friend but not my girlfriend. How can I escalate things beyond this? I'm interested in several of my friends, but I really don't know what to do. Do I just ask them out? Luckily I'm not in "love" with any of them because I believe you can't love someone till you've had a romantic relationship for a long time so it's not like I'll be confessing my feelings to them in some dramatic way, I just want a date or two.
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Old 2009-02-27, 10:24   Link #1027
oompa loompa
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scorrere View Post
I'm 19, college freshman, and I've never had a girlfriend (or kissed a girl for that matter). I've never been on a date and only ever approached one girl (obviously rejected). I'm not great-looking but not bad looking either. Girls call me "cute" but I think they mean in a more "Awww I wanna hug him!" way rather than actually being physically attracted to me. I have a good sense of humor and I'm nice to everyone but I'm also not a pushover and will refuse to do certain things for people. I have many female friends at school, but I just can never seem to get beyond the friends stage. It seems like all the girls want to be my friend but not my girlfriend. How can I escalate things beyond this? I'm interested in several of my friends, but I really don't know what to do. Do I just ask them out? Luckily I'm not in "love" with any of them because I believe you can't love someone till you've had a romantic relationship for a long time so it's not like I'll be confessing my feelings to them in some dramatic way, I just want a date or two.
sounds like myself. simple advice? dont force it, it doesnt seem like thats your personality.. i mean dont avoid things, but relax, it will happen when it happens - tke your oppurtunities as they come, rather than trying to make your own - some people can do that, i'm not one of them.. still, its all worked just fine for me relationship wise , so dont worry

Last edited by oompa loompa; 2009-02-27 at 11:50.
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Old 2009-02-27, 11:39   Link #1028
windstar!~
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Don't worry mate, I was just the same as you - it all worked out in the end.
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Old 2009-02-27, 12:10   Link #1029
hakisak
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scorrere View Post
I'm 19, college freshman, and I've never had a girlfriend (or kissed a girl for that matter). I've never been on a date and only ever approached one girl (obviously rejected). I'm not great-looking but not bad looking either. Girls call me "cute" but I think they mean in a more "Awww I wanna hug him!" way rather than actually being physically attracted to me. I have a good sense of humor and I'm nice to everyone but I'm also not a pushover and will refuse to do certain things for people. I have many female friends at school, but I just can never seem to get beyond the friends stage. It seems like all the girls want to be my friend but not my girlfriend. How can I escalate things beyond this? I'm interested in several of my friends, but I really don't know what to do. Do I just ask them out? Luckily I'm not in "love" with any of them because I believe you can't love someone till you've had a romantic relationship for a long time so it's not like I'll be confessing my feelings to them in some dramatic way, I just want a date or two.
It might be you. You may be picking the same type of girls. Maybe you need to re-evaluate yourself.

You sound like you are nice guy, but a little bit detached. Don't concentrate on love....

Yes ask them out! What have you to lose?

ADVICE...(General) *I posted somewhere else and I don't feel like editing.

Since you are not sure ask her out casually. It doesn't necessarily have to be a date
Just say are you busy on [/insert day of choice and time] ? Wait for an answer and then take it from there. I know you don't want to ruin a friendship but it's a chance you have to take. Unrequited feelings can also ruin a friendship. So you might as well go for it. I know it's easier said than done. So just ask her as friend. If she accepts go on date/outing. If it goes well ask her again, and then continue on that route until she either figures it out, things progress naturally, or you get the nerve to tell her why. (Although if you keep asking her out. She should figure it out)

If she seeks you out, talks to you a lot, and makes frequent eye-contact with you. Or averts her eyes every time you look at her.<--that means she's looking at you. You are more than halfway there. (Don't worry if she talks about other guys right now. She may just be saying that to gauge your reaction. Girls do that some times. If she does it once she is certain of your feelings. Then it's not a good sign)

Don't rush because not all relationships happen in an instant.

P.S...try asking for her phone number first. If she gives you the number and actually answers your calls. You are on your way. ^_^



Some guys get stuck in the friend zone. Let me think on it. I never thought about how not to get stuck in it. I can tell you, its you...
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Old 2009-02-27, 13:10   Link #1030
Scorrere
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hakisak View Post
You sound like you are nice guy, but a little bit detached. Don't concentrate on love....
I'm not sure what you mean by a bit detached? I'm not concentrating on love... like I said, I feel like you can't feel that unless you have an intimate relationship for awhile.

About phone numbers, I already have most of them! Everyone gives out their number to anyone here. Plus I see them probably more than 10 times a day (remember, I live with these people in a dorm though some are outside of my dorm and live in other dorms) so not many people use their phone unless that person's not in their room.
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Old 2009-02-27, 13:13   Link #1031
hakisak
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scorrere View Post
I'm not sure what you mean by a bit detached? I'm not concentrating on love... like I said, I feel like you can't feel that unless you have an intimate relationship for awhile.
Exactly! Even if we are not looking for love. We don't want to waste time with a guy who feels this way. You might be sending..."I can't feel anything for you, unless I sleep with you..for a awhile" waves in full force...

In a nutshell, thats what you are saying...

(Its all in the delivery)
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Old 2009-02-27, 13:35   Link #1032
SaintessHeart
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I am so surprised that this thread got more than 50 pages in less than 10 hours. Congratulations.

Anyway, I have never dated a girl before in my life (they find me too critical and straightforward), but I do know that they enjoy getting positive attention at the extreme. Whatever you see on the date, just make a small reference to them, and give occasional mean jabs (not too harsh, or else they go tsuntsun).

And no, don't talk about sex.
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Old 2009-02-27, 14:39   Link #1033
hakisak
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post

And no, don't talk about sex.
Exactly...


Understand what you are saying. Its just the way you are saying it. No matter how you arrange it. It sounds as if you are saying you " You will never BE IN LOVE with her, until you hit that for awhile"--hate to be crude, but that is how she hears it.

Instead of worrying about all that. Just go for yours. Even if you are trying to ease her fears. The fact that you haven't made it first base and you are already thinking about these things. Will scare the living shit out of her. She will think you are clingy. (or a dog, or a pig, or possessive or all of them)

Women think about things like that. Guys just date--unless he's the type that gets strung on every girl he goes out with.


Just ask her out. She says no...ask another chick. Its also in your game... (How you go about it). Sometimes you can literally talk a girl into it. Just know when to draw the line. Persistence is one thing, stalking is another. Learn to know the difference.
Quote:
Don't use those stupid lines. Honesty works best--however omission isn't really lying.

...What? It isn't...


Don't get too personal on the first date. Do not tell her your whole life story....

Don't listen to other guys. Guys lie on their [insert the word you know I used] all the time. What works for them might not work for you.

Confidence is everything...

(Also don't give unsolicited advice on her hair or insult her with your "true thoughts" --unless you want to call it an early night)

Don't be a sucker either. Don't let her just "herb" you. :stare: Don't ask her to go half either, chivalry does go a long way.

Do that and even if you are shot down a few times. You will still get at least one or two. (Those other byatches will wish they had you then)
Edit: You also have to be careful. The thing about girls is we know if we will never get with a guy. Then there are guys that we are not attracted to at first, but then he grows on you.

Don't, burp, fart, scratch you neither-regions, or do anything disgusting before you are married. That image will remain etched in her memory---and you will be "done-off " You do that, and you won't even make the friend zone.

Last edited by hakisak; 2009-02-27 at 15:04. Reason: LOVE THAT WAS LOVE
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Old 2009-02-27, 16:14   Link #1034
0utf0xZer0
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My situation is actually kind of similar to Scorrere's - I haven't dated, I know a girl at university who is think is relatively attractive and who I like to talk to, but I feel like I'm too detached from her to really form a relationship. And I don't mean that in a sexual way - I just don't have really strong feelings towards her at this point, even though she's someone I really like being around. I find myself wondering whether I should ask her out and see how things go or wait and see what other options become available.
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Old 2009-02-27, 16:45   Link #1035
whitepearl
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
I am so surprised that this thread got more than 50 pages in less than 10 hours. Congratulations.

Anyway, I have never dated a girl before in my life (they find me too critical and straightforward), but I do know that they enjoy getting positive attention at the extreme. Whatever you see on the date, just make a small reference to them, and give occasional mean jabs (not too harsh, or else they go tsuntsun).

And no, don't talk about sex.
I'm more surprised this thread had been revived...

whitepearl = Team Lonely Drivers T_T
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Old 2009-02-27, 18:01   Link #1036
Lord Uiruu
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i just broke up with my girlfriend
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Old 2009-02-27, 18:42   Link #1037
DragoZERO
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Join Date: Jan 2009
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Age: 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by Xvoki View Post
My girlfriend and I are getting married next year, and neither of us are religious, its more of a symbolic thing. As for divorce, couples with children break up all the time, even non-married ones.
Congratulations. Best of luck to the both of you.


And a good source of advice: http://advice.eharmony.com/
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Old 2009-02-28, 03:00   Link #1038
hakisak
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Location: Polishing Weapons...Btw,read "Until Death Do Us Part" ^_^
Oh yeah...I just realized I never told you how to get out of the "friend zone". That was the purpose of the thread.

Start by not getting into it, in the first place.

Friendship is a nice route but you can't be "Mr. Dependable" for a girl, unless she's your girl. If you start by coming to her rescue or "Being there for her". You will be "done off". It's alright to know you let her care...just don't go overboard. Wait till she's yours...or she will come to you when she's in trouble and then get with another guy.
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Old 2009-02-28, 04:00   Link #1039
Thewanderer
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I haven't dated anyone in... months ;_;

<----Teh lonely.
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Old 2009-02-28, 04:10   Link #1040
hakisak
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Location: Polishing Weapons...Btw,read "Until Death Do Us Part" ^_^
Aw TW...I will date you (Do you really want pity-p--what am I a saying. Of course you do)

Whats your problem TW? My game tight! ( Say it slowly >) I- lay -my -mack- down-- Whaddaya wanna know? XD
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