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Old 2009-04-09, 10:04   Link #1101
Throne Invader
Protecting the Throne
 
 
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@Miko Miko
Well good luck with whatever choice you make. If you wanna gain more understanding about your situation or if you need help figuring out how to solve it, just put yourself in your friend's shoes. I'm pretty sure you'll do what's best. And don't worry about the intuition thing. Every girl has it inside em. Just trust yourself.
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Old 2009-04-09, 11:18   Link #1102
Miko Miko
Imouto-Chan♥
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: England
Age: 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by AmoreDoll View Post
@Miko Miko
Well good luck with whatever choice you make. If you wanna gain more understanding about your situation or if you need help figuring out how to solve it, just put yourself in your friend's shoes. I'm pretty sure you'll do what's best. And don't worry about the intuition thing. Every girl has it inside em. Just trust yourself.

Thanks. I hope I make the right choice and I will be able to make that choice once I stop being grounded. Thanks again for all your help and advice
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Old 2009-04-09, 11:59   Link #1103
Solafighter
Hige
 
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: God only knows
Today, when i had to go somewhere by train, cause my car is in repair.

It was crazy. ONLY couples. I was the only one single there. I felt a little lonely.

Anyone wants to be my girlfriend?

Rhetoric question. not serious.
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Old 2009-04-10, 12:38   Link #1104
Kakashi
カカシ
 
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rio View Post
y.. you are awesome.. especially the quotes
If you ever want to kiss a girl, play with her hair and say how soft her hair is, then lean in. Never fails.
and
Ask to see her hand and say how small it is or w/e, and rest your head on hers.




you are a very playboy, aren't you? or is it usual to do for boys ?

i haven't seen boys doing that in Japan.. maybe they are shy . They aren't good at praising girls .
Well, flirting 'styles' may be different, according to the culture and the mores of that country, i.e. where certain types of behavior may or may not be deemed socially acceptable, but in the end, "there is nothing new under the sun" and flirting is flirting, in any style you choose.

Where you can get away with outlandish behavior, you will do outlandish flirting, and conversely, where only propriety is acceptable, you will not be able to do but only the most subtle flirting (if at all). A good example being very staunch Muslim countries.

In most Western countries, however, the amount and styles of flirting runs the gamut. In London, I wouldn't be considered a playboy at all. The furthest I would go in describing myself is...confident? But not always. When I decide to go for a girl that's how I behave, but in general I'm more conservative. It's kinda like a switch.

Quote:
i think praising girls to get a girlfriend is not so bad..if i were treated like that, i wouldn't feel bad (though if it seemed very intentionally or exaggerated, i would withdraw ) but how will you keep that attitude to her in your relationship ?

i just wonder.. if you do that by your natural personality, it's good. But if you just pretend,and stop that when you are tired, that relationship wouldn't turn good , and as a result hurt her .

How do you think about it?
Good question, that's definitely something I've thought about in the past. The best way to go about it is obviously to keep the compliments geniune. I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing to slightly exaggerate as long as the compliment itself isn't baseless. Guys really do have a lot of good things to say about girls they like, most of the time they're either supressing it or struggling to express themselves without sounding like a creep.

You are right that if he's just doing it as a sort of trick, and that's not how the guy really feels, it will inevitably catch up to them and the girl will get hurt.
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Old 2009-04-10, 13:33   Link #1105
Miki7
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ The shoujo ♥
 
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Shiuuuuu!!! ;)
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Congratulation I wish you the best
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Old 2009-04-10, 15:31   Link #1106
Nervous Venus
Senior Member
 
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Between a rock and a hard place.
Age: 29
Quote:
If you ever want to kiss a girl, play with her hair and say how soft her hair is, then lean in. Never fails.
and
Ask to see her hand and say how small it is or w/e, and rest your head on hers.
Do guys really believe that this works with all girls? >.>;;
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Old 2009-04-11, 22:10   Link #1107
rio
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Join Date: Aug 2006
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kakashi View Post
Well, flirting 'styles' may be different, according to the culture and the mores of that country, i.e. where certain types of behavior may or may not be deemed socially acceptable, but in the end, "there is nothing new under the sun" and flirting is flirting, in any style you choose.

Where you can get away with outlandish behavior, you will do outlandish flirting, and conversely, where only propriety is acceptable, you will not be able to do but only the most subtle flirting (if at all). A good example being very staunch Muslim countries.

In most Western countries, however, the amount and styles of flirting runs the gamut. In London, I wouldn't be considered a playboy at all. The furthest I would go in describing myself is...confident? But not always. When I decide to go for a girl that's how I behave, but in general I'm more conservative. It's kinda like a switch.

Good question, that's definitely something I've thought about in the past. The best way to go about it is obviously to keep the compliments geniune. I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing to slightly exaggerate as long as the compliment itself isn't baseless. Guys really do have a lot of good things to say about girls they like, most of the time they're either supressing it or struggling to express themselves without sounding like a creep.

You are right that if he's just doing it as a sort of trick, and that's not how the guy really feels, it will inevitably catch up to them and the girl will get hurt.
Thanks for explaining . You are absolutely right.
I was really impressed that you did things like that i quoted even you are living in western countries. Those were even shocking to me, so wanted to know how you are thinking about such behaviors.
But you have your view in that the behaviors are related to the culture , and those are not only for catching women, those are natural things you do in your way to get along with women . i am relieved to hear that. ^^

Thanks for explaining again
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Old 2009-04-11, 23:49   Link #1108
Irkalla
I asked for this
 
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nervous Venus View Post
Do guys really believe that this works with all girls? >.>;;
Or more like, on which girl does it even work on? Seriously, If a guy did that to me, I'd think he is seriously challenged. Sounds like a thing you'd read in a bad how-to-date guidebook or something. Seriously, no offense, but that really got me to go WTFBBQ. If he'd just say I have nice boobs or something, but hair? That's a whole new lvl of flattery there
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Old 2009-04-12, 00:29   Link #1109
qwertyuiopz
Senior Member
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
ive dated twice

and i have to say its so much nicer being single
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Old 2009-04-12, 01:07   Link #1110
Jazzrat
Bearly Legal
 
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zaseka View Post
Or more like, on which girl does it even work on? Seriously, If a guy did that to me, I'd think he is seriously challenged. Sounds like a thing you'd read in a bad how-to-date guidebook or something. Seriously, no offense, but that really got me to go WTFBBQ. If he'd just say I have nice boobs or something, but hair? That's a whole new lvl of flattery there
Girls like to be complimented on their hair though
I manage to get a girl to perm her hair cause i told her she looks very
pretty with it.
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Old 2009-04-12, 01:18   Link #1111
Irkalla
I asked for this
 
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Winterfell
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jazzrat View Post
Girls like to be complimented on their hair though
I manage to get a girl to perm her hair cause i told her she looks very
pretty with it.
That is an entirely different situation though. You basically told her how she could improve, according to your tastes. If a girl does that to please you, then she is practically "yours", or was already to begin with.
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Old 2009-04-12, 01:22   Link #1112
blue skies
noch einmal?
 
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jazzrat View Post
Girls like to be complimented on their hair though
I manage to get a girl to perm her hair cause i told her she looks very
pretty with it.
True, but I hardly think playing with a girl's hair and then going in for the kill is going to get you a kiss in most cases. At least not from most of us. My reaction would be more like wtf, why are you touching my hair.
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Old 2009-04-12, 01:45   Link #1113
Jazzrat
Bearly Legal
 
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zaseka View Post
That is an entirely different situation though. You basically told her how she could improve, according to your tastes. If a girl does that to please you, then she is practically "yours", or was already to begin with.
Funny thing is, she's not. There's some good feeling between us but she tends to shy away when i tried to be more aggressive in my approach. It's rather perplexing for me but i think she's rather confused in what she wants from me.
But i meant to say that it's not weird for guys to pay attention to the girls' hair.

Quote:
Originally Posted by blue skies View Post
True, but I hardly think playing with a girl's hair and then going in for the kill is going to get you a kiss in most cases. At least not from most of us. My reaction would be more like wtf, why are you touching my hair.
Though going for the kill by just playing with her hair seems rather out of order to me as well Most of time, i went for it after the girl gave in to me holding her hand and hugging her
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Old 2009-04-12, 08:33   Link #1114
Throne Invader
Protecting the Throne
 
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blue skies View Post
True, but I hardly think playing with a girl's hair and then going in for the kill is going to get you a kiss in most cases. At least not from most of us. My reaction would be more like wtf, why are you touching my hair.
The reaction you will get will vary depending on the type of girl you're dating. I'm more of the latter but I wouldn't be so rude as in saying it out loud. I'd just move my head farther from the guy. I kind of dislike girls who make it easy though.
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Old 2009-04-12, 13:33   Link #1115
ChainLegacy
廉頗
 
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Massachusetts, US
Age: 25
Those "techniques" certainly do work like a charm, probably even for the girls claiming otherwise. The secret to it is having sparks flying beforehand!
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Old 2009-04-12, 16:34   Link #1116
Kakashi
カカシ
 
 
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Location: London
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rio View Post
Thanks for explaining . You are absolutely right.
I was really impressed that you did things like that i quoted even you are living in western countries. Those were even shocking to me, so wanted to know how you are thinking about such behaviors.
But you have your view in that the behaviors are related to the culture , and those are not only for catching women, those are natural things you do in your way to get along with women . i am relieved to hear that. ^^

Thanks for explaining again
Oh it was shocking? So how do boys normally behave in Japan? ^^

Quote:
Originally Posted by ChainLegacy View Post
Those "techniques" certainly do work like a charm, probably even for the girls claiming otherwise. The secret to it is having sparks flying beforehand!
Heh, well I assumed people would figure that out, you can't just attack random girls. I tried
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Old 2009-04-13, 03:09   Link #1117
rio
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kakashi View Post
Oh it was shocking? So how do boys normally behave in Japan? ^^
They rarely praise women. When they approach to girls, they close to them and ask ''Can you tell me your mobile phone number?'' or in streets, ''Do you have time now? Could we talk in a cafe for a while?'' etc..
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Last edited by rio; 2009-04-13 at 04:51.
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Old 2009-04-13, 22:29   Link #1118
FateAnomaly
Senior Member
 
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Quote:
Originally Posted by rio View Post
They rarely praise women. When they approach to girls, they close to them and ask ''Can you tell me your mobile phone number?'' or in streets, ''Do you have time now? Could we talk in a cafe for a while?'' etc..
Wow thats really straightforward....
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Old 2009-04-14, 05:50   Link #1119
SaintessHeart
NYAAAAHAAANNNNN~
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Age: 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by rio View Post
They rarely praise women. When they approach to girls, they close to them and ask ''Can you tell me your mobile phone number?'' or in streets, ''Do you have time now? Could we talk in a cafe for a while?'' etc..
That sounds like fun! But here is an analogy I made that got me a detention plus a whole chunk of respect from my form teacher back in middle school.....

The girl you are dating is just like a toy which you do not own that you are playing with. Since you are the one playing with her, you have to bear the necessary responsibilities if anything happens. Don't worry about your toy if it is already broken, there is bound to be a way to repair it, if not, there is another way to play with it. It is how much fun you have with it that matters.
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Old 2009-04-14, 19:02   Link #1120
Throne Invader
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
That sounds like fun! But here is an analogy I made that got me a detention plus a whole chunk of respect from my form teacher back in middle school.....

The girl you are dating is just like a toy which you do not own that you are playing with. Since you are the one playing with her, you have to bear the necessary responsibilities if anything happens. Don't worry about your toy if it is already broken, there is bound to be a way to repair it, if not, there is another way to play with it. It is how much fun you have with it that matters.
Dating should be fun and in a way liberal but not to the extent of treating the other as a toy. Seriously, don't say that analogy of yours in front of any hardcore feminist. And hopefully you didn't say that in front of your class.
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