General Questions Thread

[Vexx]

Originally Posted by Komari

Do colleges in Japan use sailor uniforms like most high schools? If so, do most colleges use these uniforms?

A few colleges have uniforms, many don't. More likely you'll find a "social dress code" - you're expected to conform (its not that unlike US colleges where your clique or social club defines what you wear). Some women's colleges do use the seifuku as their uniform.

source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Japanese_school_uniform

[SaintessHeart]

This is silly sounding but serious question :

Is there a way to disown my parents legally? I am tired of them doing things that constantly threaten to ruin my life and yet refuse to acknowledge or take responsibility of it.

Otherwise, is there any way to circumvent the legalities of obligatory parental support other than killing them in cold blood?

[TinyRedLeaf]

... ... ...

In short, no, you're out of luck. Not in Singapore. The Family Court in Singapore deals only with the following issues:

• Adoption proceedings under the Adoption of Children Act
• Divorce, nullity and judicial separation proceedings under Part X of the Women’s Charter
• Guardianship, custody, care and control of and access to children under the Guardianship of Infants Act and Part X of the Women’s Charter
• Division of matrimonial assets under Part X and section 59 of the Women’s Charter
• Personal protection orders under Part VII of the Women’s Charter
• Spousal and child maintenance under Parts VIII and X of the Women’s Charter
• Enforcement of maintenance orders made by Singapore courts, the Maintenance of Parents Tribunal and the Syariah Court under section 71 and Part IX of the Women’s Charter and the Maintenance of Parents Tribunal Act
• Reciprocal enforcement of maintenance orders made by foreign courts or tribunals under the Maintenance Orders (Facilities for Enforcement) Act and Maintenance Orders (Reciprocal Enforcement) Act

Furthermore, the court operates under "The Family Justice Model":

"The philosophy of the Family Court is to protect family obligations so that family ties may be strengthened and preserved. Family obligations refer to duties that have to be discharged by each spouse to the other, by a parent to his child, and vice versa, and by all persons to their family members.

"These include a parent's responsibility to maintain, nurture and care for his children, an adult child's duty to maintain his parent, a husband's duty to maintain his wife, and the duty of all family members to treat each other with care, concern and respect."

=========

Also, take note that under the Maintenance of Parents Act, passed in 1995, aged parents over 60, who are unable to subsist on their own, may claim maintenance from their children who are capable of supporting him or her but are not doing so.

Parents can sue their children for maintenance, in the form of monthly allowances or a lump-sum payment.


You are no more able to legally disown your parents as they are legally able to disown you — this is true at least in Singapore. Frankly, unless there is some proof of severe parental abuse — say incest, rape or paedophilia — I can't even begin to imagine the need to "disown" one's parents.

==========
ADDENDUM

While you can't legally disown your parents in Singapore, the closest thing you can get is a Personal Protection Order, issued in cases of family violence as defined by Section 64 of the Women's Charter.

Family violence can occur in the following forms:

• Wilfully or knowingly placing, or attempting to place, a family member in fear of hurt;
• Causing hurt to a family member by such act which is known or ought to have been known would result in hurt;
• Wrongfully confining or restraining a family member against his will; or
• Causing continual harassment with intent to cause or knowing that it is likely to cause anguish to a family member

A "family member" is defined in the Women's Charter as:

• Spouse or former spouse of the person
• Child of the person, including an adopted child and a step-child
• Father or mother of the person
• Father-in-law or mother-in-law of the person
• Brother or sister of the person
• Any other relative of the person or an incapacitated person who in the opinion of the court should, in the circumstances, in either case be regarded as a member of the family of the person

You need to go through several steps to get a Personal Protection Order. Details are available at the Ministry of Community Devleopment's (MCYS) website, and also at the Subordinate Court's website.

Along with the Protection Order, a court may also issue a (source here, Pg 20, brochure published by MCYS):

• Domestic Exclusion Order, which grants the right of exclusive occupation of the shared residence or a specified part of the shared residence to any protected person by excluding the abuser from the shared residence or specified part
• Counselling Order which refers the abuser or the protected person or both, or their children to attend counselling.

Failure to comply with any of the above orders constitutes a criminal offence and will be dealt with accordingly under the Penal Code.

[Vexx]

Doesn't sound like "they're financially ruining me with their spendy habits" qualifies :P

[Kudryavka]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

This is silly sounding but serious question :

Is there a way to disown my parents legally? I am tired of them doing things that constantly threaten to ruin my life and yet refuse to acknowledge or take responsibility of it.

Otherwise, is there any way to circumvent the legalities of obligatory parental support other than killing them in cold blood?

You're twenty-one, right? Legal age to just up and leave? I'm not saying you should just go all out and cut off contact from your folks, but leaving is an option. You don't have to let them affect you anymore, right? This is the closest I know of of disowning parents.

[ganbaru]

We don't knowabout the seriousness and nature of the thread ( his parents's behavior), but given it's SaintessHeart ( someone than showded in the past both weirdness and brain) I would keep a open mind while asking for more informations.

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by ganbaru

We don't knowabout the seriousness and nature of the thread ( his parents's behavior), but given it's SaintessHeart ( someone than showded in the past both weirdness and brain) I would keep a open mind while asking for more informations.

This question sounds silly, but it is 99% serious, 0.5% rant and 0.5% sarcasm.

Originally Posted by TinyRedLeaf

<snip>

Looks like two things :

1. Singapore government has got excellent transparency in legal operations. I knew most of that from solely Google.

2. I am screwed due to those laws.

Originally Posted by Vexx

Doesn't sound like "they're financially ruining me with their spendy habits" qualifies :P

I think it is more like : mother doesn't earn enough to send both children for tertiary education, father refuses to fund children's education expense due to extra marital affairs, legal system has no way to intervene due to rigidly structured laws and government agencies can't intervene due to their SOPs.

And either reason constitutes to a "No. F*** off." under the legal system.

As of now, though I have secured a job paying a minimum of 1k per month, I am lacking in attendance over at my school, which disallows me to take exams at the end of this semester. I am contesting it to the school management and all they quote is the bloody "school rules", "student-school contract" and "financial assistance plan" which I don't qualify for due to my overall family income (including my father's who doesn't even give a single cent).

Another of the dumber suggestions I get is that I work first, then further my education later. If anyone of them read the Key Household Income Trends, 2009, Feb 2010 (Occasional Paper), Singapore In Figures 2009 and Report on the Household Expenditure Survey, 2007/08, plus the relevant articles listed on this page like Economical Statistics, all of the indicators point towards economical growth and/or inflation.

And due to :

1. My parents are set to retire in 5 years time (meaning I have to feed them under Obligatory Parental Support).

2. I am holding a job, not a career (meaning no opportunity for personal and financial growth).

3. My job is increasingly outsourced to foreign nationals and permanent residents due to insufficient locals wanting the job and lower cost of hiring foreigners (meaning there will be a recontract at a lower pay in the future).

4. I am only holding 'O' Levels (my 'A's don't count since I got bad grades).

5. Rising costs of living (and possible further rise in the next few years)

6. Certification limbo (either overqualified, underqualified or unqualified for most jobs).

7. Lack of time for a response (I can only miss 1 more day of school, and I have 5 more days of work training which I cannot miss).

8. Unable to submit continuous assignments (50% of overall mark weightage) due to not being able to attend school and meet the lecturer (which of course, is due to the work training).

9. Requirement to pay damages if I quit my job due to training being provided by the government and company is unable to claim from the Workforce Development Scheme as I have quitted halfway through.

10. No guarantee of a job sufficient to paying off a bank loan even after I graduate (which I can't even get in the first place).

================================================== ==========================================

And no, I cannot take my dad to court because :

1. Under the Women's Charter, Part 8, Section 69, it states :

(2) A District Court or a Magistrate’s Court may, on due proof that a parent has neglected or refused to provide reasonable maintenance for his child who is unable to maintain himself, order that parent to pay a monthly allowance or a lump sum for the maintenance of that child.

This requires a PI report AND my mother's verbal statement as a witness. And my mum refuses to because it makes her "throw face".

2. Although

(3) An application for the maintenance of a child under subsection (2) may be made by —

(a) any person who is a guardian or has the actual custody of the child;

(b) where the child has attained the age of 21 years, by the child himself;

(c) where the child is below the age of 21 years, any of his siblings who has attained the age of 21 years; or

(d) any person appointed by the Minister.

These

(4) The court, when ordering maintenance for a wife or child under this section, shall have regard to all the circumstances of the case including the following matters:

(a) the financial needs of the wife or child;

(b) the income, earning capacity (if any), property and other financial resources of the wife or child;

(c) any physical or mental disability of the wife or child;

(d) the age of each party to the marriage and the duration of the marriage;

(e) the contributions made by each of the parties to the marriage to the welfare of the family, including any contribution made by looking after the home or caring for the family;

(f) the standard of living enjoyed by the wife or child before the husband or parent, as the case may be, neglected or refused to provide reasonable maintenance for the wife or child;

(g) in the case of a child, the manner in which he was being, and in which the parties to the marriage expected him to be, educated or trained; and

(h) the conduct of each of the parties to the marriage, if the conduct is such that it would in the opinion of the court be inequitable to disregard it.

and

(6) An order under subsection (2) ceases to be in force on the day on which the child attains the age of 21 years unless the order is expressed to continue in force for a period ending after that day.

(8) When ordering the payment of maintenance under this section or at any time after the making of the order, the court may, if it considers just, order the person liable to pay the maintenance to secure the whole or any part of it by vesting any property belonging to the person in trustees upon trust to pay the maintenance or any part of it out of the income from the property, and subject thereto, in trust for the settlor.

messed everything up. Why? My dad is completely broke without a single cent in his bank account. All went to that bitch out there.

Not even this works

(5) The court shall not make an order under subsection (2) for the benefit of a child who has attained the age of 21 years or for a period that extends beyond the day on which the child will attain that age unless the court is satisfied that the provision of the maintenance is necessary because —

Despite

(a) of a mental or physical disability of the child;

(b) the child is or will be serving full-time national service;

(c) the child is or will be or (if an order were made under subsection (2)) would be receiving instruction at an educational establishment or undergoing training for a trade, profession or vocation, whether or not while in gainful employment; or

(d) special circumstances, other than those stated in paragraphs (a), (b) and (c), exist which justify the making of the order.

due to (and maybe even all of the above shit I have quoted) it be refutable with THIS under Part 10, Chapter 5, Section 122,

Meaning of “child”
122. In this Chapter, wherever the context so requires, “child” means a child of the marriage as defined in section 92 but who is below the age of 21 years.

I don't have alot of legal help. Neither are my parents helping me. Even I can file maintenance, all my dad has to do is to quit his job and spite us all, then wait for 5 years until the Parental Support Act kicks in and start leeching money from me again.

================================================== ==========================================

I have three options :

1. Commit suicide

2. Commit homicide

3. Continue looking for options (the most feasible and realistic ones are already crossed off)

Which one should I choose (for 3, please indicate a valid solution)?

[risingstar3110]

Knowing you, i am surprised and really feel sorry for the situation that you are in, SaintessHeart.

Don't have much recommendation because i don't know well your situation. But from my own experience, i think you should create a mind map (of your current situation) to see if there is any option that you missed (including anyone whom you can depend on). Then assuming that you only have 7 days to live before deciding your action.


But seriously, instead of suicide or homicide, wouldn't it be better for you to collect all of your valuable item, quickly turning them to cash, and restart your life somewhere else? It may sound terrible, but changes always are for better or for worse. And the first two are worst already

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by risingstar3110

But seriously, instead of suicide or homicide, wouldn't it be better for you to collect all of your valuable item, quickly turning them to cash, and restart your life somewhere else? It may sound terrible, but changes always are for better or for worse. And the first two are worst already

You know, all my valuables went into the pawnshop and was turned into SURVIVAL FUNDS for the past 2 months after I left the army.

Unless I sell my ass, I have no other valuable item to sell (my computer is a NECESSITY, not a VALUABLE ITEM).

[risingstar3110]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

You know, all my valuables went into the pawnshop and was turned into SURVIVAL FUNDS for the past 2 months after I left the army.

Unless I sell my ass, I have no other valuable item to sell (my computer is a NECESSITY, not a VALUABLE ITEM).

I don't know how well can you support yourself now, or what exactly is that Parental Support Act.
But if you adopt a child (or having one, a girl perhaps), then can you keep your money to fund your kid future? Or that Parental Support Act would still allow your father to leech your money off?
Maybe not now, but in 5 years time when he quit his job

PS: I don't even knows if it can help you that way, but i'm trying to let you re-focusing your mindset here, so that hopefully some new options can be opened up.

[felix]

Originally Posted by risingstar3110

PS: I don't even knows if it can help you that way, but i'm trying to let you re-focusing your mindset here, so that hopefully some new options can be opened up.

Run away and adopt yourself.
Change identity and move to another city.
Move to another country.

[FateAnomaly]

I don't know about the law much but i think the law is not that unflexible. If your parents apply for maintenance, you can tell them the situation. Maybe you still have to pay but the amount of maintenance could be reduced to only a token sum.

[TinyRedLeaf]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

I don't have alot of legal help. Neither are my parents helping me. Even I can file maintenance, all my dad has to do is to quit his job and spite us all, then wait for 5 years until the Parental Support Act kicks in and start leeching money from me again.

The Maintenance of Parents Act does not work that way. Specifically, the Maintenance of Parents Tribunal must first be satisfied that:

• The respondent (the child) is able to provide maintenance to the applicant (the parent) after his own requirements and those of his spouse and his children have been supplied
  
• The applicant is unable, in spite of efforts on his part, to maintain himself through work or from his property or from any other source.

Meaning to say, no maintenance will be automatically granted to irresponsible parents. The onus for proving irresponsibility, though, will fall on the adult child being sued for maintenance. In any case, since you can barely even support yourself, the Tribunal is not in a position to beggar you further just to support your parent.

If not, it would be an abuse of the law. It's meant to protect parents — not to give freeloaders a meal ticket.

As for your circumstances, my sympathies. In the light of the situation you described, I don't think you'll get fruitful answers here. There are probably a great deal of other details that you have not revealed, details that are understandably very private and best not discussed online with an anonymous online community.

Furthermore, not knowing you in person, any advice I could give would come across as a pat answer, and very unlikely to be helpful. I also risk pre-judging the different parties involved — again, not very helpful.

For a start, though, I would suggest approaching the Workforce Development Agency for help over the terms and conditions of your job-training bond. Seems to me that your first priority should be to protect your rice bowl.

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by TinyRedLeaf

The Maintenance of Parents Act does not work that way. Specifically, the Maintenance of Parents Tribunal must first be satisfied that:

• The respondent (the child) is able to provide maintenance to the applicant (the parent) after his own requirements and those of his spouse and his children have been supplied
  
• The applicant is unable, in spite of efforts on his part, to maintain himself through work or from his property or from any other source.

Meaning to say, no maintenance will be automatically granted to irresponsible parents. The onus for proving irresponsibility, though, will fall on the adult child being sued for maintenance. In any case, since you can barely even support yourself, the Tribunal is not in a position to beggar you further just to support your parent.

If not, it would be an abuse of the law. It's meant to protect parents — not to give freeloaders a meal ticket.

As for your circumstances, my sympathies. In the light of the situation you described, I don't think you'll get fruitful answers here. There are probably a great deal of other details that you have not revealed, details that are understandably very private and best not discussed online with an anonymous online community.

Furthermore, not knowing you in person, any advice I could give would come across as a pat answer, and very unlikely to be helpful. I also risk pre-judging the different parties involved — again, not very helpful.

For a start, though, I would suggest approaching the Workforce Development Agency for help over the terms and conditions of your job-training bond. Seems to me that your first priority should be to protect your rice bowl.

I went to a legal clinic for advice, and what I was told is the onus for proving irresponsibility is almost the same as proving that my father is unfaithful : quite an impossibility unless strap him to a slanted table and pour water down his nose.

Regarding the WDA, I have thought through that but I doubt I have the time to make a F2F interview. The other options I have considered in the past is to peddle drugs or be a loanshark runner, but I wasn't as desperate as I am now so I ditched them. Wished I had take them up and saved money back then when it is still available - having a conscience kinda sucks.

Looks like this hell week is going to repeat itself for the next 104 cycles until I graduate. And I guess this is what Santa meant by those who don't work don't deserve to eat.

P.S I have been a hikkikomori for 2 months and a shut-in otaku (the less social and more extreme type of otaku) since 16. Hopefully my sanity outlasts this shit, but the "I have been through this for 2 years, so what is another 2?" self-motivation technique is getting old.

[FateAnomaly]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

The other options I have considered in the past is to peddle drugs or be a loanshark runner, but I wasn't as desperate as I am now so I ditched them.

If you had taken them up you would be sitting in jail now.

[TinyRedLeaf]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

I went to a legal clinic for advice, and what I was told is the onus for proving irresponsibility is almost the same as proving that my father is unfaithful : quite an impossibility unless strap him to a slanted table and pour water down his nose.

Unfaithful to whom? Presumably to your mother? You already said your father is having an extra-marital affair. Plus, you can barely make ends meet, so how is the Tribunal supposed to make you pay for your father's upkeep?

And let's not forget, the parent has to be at least 60 or above. So, unless your father is already at that age, I'd say he is the least of your problems at the moment.

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

Regarding the WDA, I have thought through that but I doubt I have the time to make a F2F interview. The other options I have considered in the past is to peddle drugs or be a loanshark runner, but I wasn't as desperate as I am now so I ditched them. Wished I had take them up and saved money back then when it is still available - having a conscience kinda sucks.

This is where it's hard to decide how seriously I should take your problems — you clearly know that being a runner for drugs or loan-sharking syndicates is out of the question. If you really did believe they were valid options, you wouldn't be talking about them in public.

And why don't you have time to make a face-to-face interview with WDA? Can't you make time when your livelihood depends on it?

While its commendable that you're trying to continue education while working at the same time, if you can't balance the two, you have to sacrifice one or the other. Hence, I strongly suggest you do whatever you can to save your job first.

MeoTwister5 (below): Don't know what you mean by "emancipation laws" in this context. You'd have to elaborate.

[MeoTwister5]

They don't have emancipation laws and rights in Singapore?

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by MeoTwister5

They don't have emancipation laws and rights in Singapore?

Legal rights are decided on a case-by-case basis. And nope, not for emancipation if you meant by me totally cut off relations with my parents.

[Cipher]

Why is Aria, a shounen? or any other female protagonist shounen anime for that matter. Does it make sense that the gender of the main character is the opposite of the supposed audience of the show?

[felix]

Originally Posted by Cipher

Does it make sense that the gender of the main character is the opposite of the supposed audience of the show?

Yes. It does.