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Old 2012-01-11, 07:57   Link #17581
ZeroXSEED
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
@ Senpai - I'm betting right now that Ran's school will be just like ISA when it comes to students.
You mean they'll morph into puddle at the sight of Ichika?

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Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
Does Ran still beat up her brother here? I doubt she can kick or scare him considering what he's already done at this point.
No, since like other heroine, she's more reasonable compared to canon. At most, she'll act intimidating.

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Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
It's also a bit symbolic. By killing one monster, she created another to take his place. This even shows an odd bit of generation xerox since his sisters are just like her mom was. Now they're fighting each other
Hmm.... poor Irish.

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So stabbing someone in the leg and kicking them will?
If the stab went to the large artery, then the kick will takes the cake and make it instant defeat (also, loud, loud scream). If not treated in 3 minutes, may result of dying.

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Side note - It's the only site that has it It's non-hentai. don't worry.
Nom nom nom, I have the copy from Blitz's mediafire link remember? :|
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:06   Link #17582
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@ Senpai - You know, what are the chances that Ran has a Kohai that likes her, stalks her, and acts Yandere on any perceived "competition"?

Act intimidating? How does she try to intimidate someone who got stabbed and beat up on a daily basis?

He actually angsts very little after finding out he's been fighting his remaining parents and siblings. He remarks that since he doesn't remember anything about his childhood, then he has no reason to care about people he doesn't remember.

What on the foot itself or just above it?

Side note - Is it the same doujin? I thought Blitz gave you a different one. I got mine from Tempest35.
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:12   Link #17583
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
@ Senpai - You know, what are the chances that Ran has a Kohai that likes her, stalks her, and acts Yandere on any perceived "competition"?
Is Ran really that famous or what?

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Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
Act intimidating? How does she try to intimidate someone who got stabbed and beat up on a daily basis?
Think Kirino from OreImo but minus the physical violence.

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Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
He actually angsts very little after finding out he's been fighting his remaining parents and siblings. He remarks that since he doesn't remember anything about his childhood, then he has no reason to care about people he doesn't remember.
Hmm....

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What on the foot itself or just above it?
Spoiler for Artery map:


if that big red line got stabbed, game over in 3 minutes... no, 2 minutes (it's a picture of hip)

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Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
Side note - Is it the same doujin? I thought Blitz gave you a different one. I got mine from Tempest35.
No, mine has same title and Chifuyu introduction scene.
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:24   Link #17584
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Spoiler for bath massa- I mean scene:


----------------------------------------------------------

What did I just write?
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:26   Link #17585
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I'll just leave this quick snippethere

Spoiler for Maria vs Elena : A Typical Day:
>w< 一生の不覚の独り

Now that I'm done with that, I can focus on my stuff
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:27   Link #17586
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@ Senpai - She's been described as an honor student, the student council prez, and an "Onee-sama" in her school.

Kirino's brother doesn't have experience in street fighting and dangerous situations.

How else would he react? "I feel so conflicted fighting a family I've never heard about and is working for the people who treated me like a dog for a year!" or something?

Looks like hitting the foot itself or very lower leg is safe. I'm assuming it still stuns a person even if it's not on the artery.
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:27   Link #17587
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@Demi
WHAT THE-

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@ Senpai - She's been described as an honor student, the student council prez, and an "Onee-sama" in her school.
I see.

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Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
Kirino's brother doesn't have experience in street fighting and dangerous situations.
What should I do? Making her a shrinking violet?

Anyway, change the whole 'Ran involved in teh bloodbath' stuff. The first time Ran saw Ichika and Dan in their blood frenzy is in chapter 12. :|

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How else would he react? "I feel so conflicted fighting a family I've never heard about and is working for the people who treated me like a dog for a year!" or something?
I never said you have to change it

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Looks like hitting the foot itself or very lower leg is safe. I'm assuming it still stuns a person even if it's not on the artery.
Exactly.
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:34   Link #17588
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@ Demi - That looks pretty damn hilarious Small thing, though. Why did Natasha feel left out? She was the one who suggested groping everyone.
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:37   Link #17589
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Clarissa was the one who lead the groping. Natashia was clueless

@zero: There's a reason I was giggling while I was typing that out
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:47   Link #17590
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@ Senpai - Is their dad alive here or on a bus trip somewhere?

I'm afraid I made Irish a bit too.......blank. He rarely ever seems to emote and never seems to angst no matter how many things he finds out in the story.

That's how the plane fight ends Who says you can't bring a knife to a gunfight

@ Demi - You just made a draft that's good enough to be a chapter prologue. Why not post it?
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:50   Link #17591
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@era-era: Too lazy to. Plus I think it won't cut T rating
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:52   Link #17592
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@ Senpai - Is their dad alive here or on a bus trip somewhere?
I plan to make it ambiguous, but knowing Blitz, I'll just make him an orphan anyway. Making his regret about his recklessness all the more striking. :|

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I'm afraid I made Irish a bit too.......blank. He rarely ever seems to emote and never seems to angst no matter how many things he finds out in the story.
Well, you're the one said emotional =/= angst, and I agree completely.

I count plenty of occasion he burst out into emotion from your concept.

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That's how the plane fight ends Who says you can't bring a knife to a gunfight
Definitely.

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@ Demi - You just made a draft that's good enough to be a chapter prologue. Why not post it?
Yeah, even though it's not my cup of tea, I'd say good enough for general population.

EDIT: really? I don't see it being more than T, pushing a little bit but not breaking the limit.

--------------------------------
Also, local track I found that fits Sacred Twins somehow, will post the translated lyric later.

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Old 2012-01-11, 08:53   Link #17593
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What do you mean not cut the T rating? It never goes to explicit detail and there's no sex on it. It doesn't take too long to post and the flashback chapter to explain why they're there can happen next.
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:56   Link #17594
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I'll pass. I hold deep grudges.
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Old 2012-01-11, 08:57   Link #17595
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@ Senpai - What did Dan have to do about his Dad not being there? What do you mean reckless?

Most of those were anger and he rarely ever shows anything else. Is that sufficient enough for a character to go on?

@ Demi - Why? Just because of that one d-bag who trolls every OC fic out there? He did it on the Index archive as well.
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Old 2012-01-11, 09:03   Link #17596
demino_hellsin
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If I'm going back to IS section of the site, it's going to be with a male OC story. Though I'll probably never get one off the ground. Writing it's annoying, like groping around in the dark and the only light to guide you is the one that keeps saying you're going the wrong way.
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Old 2012-01-11, 09:06   Link #17597
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@ Demi - have you seen the recent fics right now? Both of them are male IS pilots and none of them have any complaints. The ones who keep saying negative things and troll comments left a while ago and you're pretty much free to do what you want. Why not go against the grain here and do a fic that shows an (initially) uninvolved, untrained, and inexperienced OC? That's new and allows for character growth.
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Old 2012-01-11, 09:08   Link #17598
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@ Senpai - What did Dan have to do about his Dad not being there? What do you mean reckless?
He is the oldest son, even with the stigma about women dominance, in any normal, balanced family, the father role is essential. If the father isn't there, then the oldest son will HAVE to bear it.

Reckless as in, he could die at any moment if shit hits the fan and students brawl turned into a blood carnage (like what happened in the flashback and chapter 12 in general)

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Most of those were anger and he rarely ever shows anything else. Is that sufficient enough for a character to go on?
Then have him visibly sad or happy once or twice as he learn human emotion.

I remember Irish tend to be confused how to act to kindness and positive attitude.

@ Demi

I agree with Eras, I'm going as far as changing the MOST popular heroine into a guy, then inserting a full fledged Marty Stu to add extra salt for the butthurt. But they're essential to the plot, so I did it anyway.

However, if you want to do it, best if the character has growth potential, not already matured. The stray Gospel for example has a lot of potential, even if it guarantees bittersweet/downer ending.
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Old 2012-01-11, 09:12   Link #17599
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Probably why I'm wracking my brain for a new idea on a male pilot But I don't want it to be an IS or IS derivative. It's going to be something that fights directly against IS. No hiding, no scheming.

@zero: though I really like the Silver Gospel
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Old 2012-01-11, 09:19   Link #17600
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@ Demi - It doesn't have to be a mech. Airplanes could probably foght against an IS if they're tricked out enough and the pilot is good enough. This also prevents the whole Marty Stu thing since they can't say he can summon it out of his ass whenever he wants.

@ Senpai - .......Wouldn't that Role go to Gen instead? He has the overportectiveness and hamminess down already

Does shyness to perverted things count? He acts like Ichika in regards to those. Also, I just remembered amnesiac mode which is very emotional.
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