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Old 2012-12-11, 11:00   Link #181
RRW
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
There is one effective way that is used on me by a really good friend.

He just refuse to leave me alone that day and just beat the crap out of me, broke my glasses and kept shouting and shaking me by the collar until I bruised his ribs with a kick.

It is the same for all of them : they are trapped in a psychological loop that will need some hard knock to break them out of it.
Remind me to me friend. he basically a bully and i always his victim. then i punch him. It nearly kill him. then we become friend (he is OK now)

Quote:
Originally Posted by mystogan View Post
that i can't because mostly it is me who is the victim, and i don't mostly find anyone in need of any comforting
Oh Ok. then try to be nice to other people. there has to be nice person somewhere in your area
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Old 2012-12-11, 11:14   Link #182
SaintessHeart
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RRW View Post
Remind me to me friend. he basically a bully and i always his victim. then i punch him. It nearly kill him. then we become friend (he is OK now)
Heh this friend of mine is something like willx. Was a bloody genius, but got easily bored and had a fuse length of the circumfrence of Eclair's breasts. Always got into trouble in school, constant suspensions, but never fails to make it to the top 50 during mid-year and finalsin his school.

I guess that day he got sick of my moaning and wallowing in self-pity that he bashed me up. I had to admit it - I asked for the bullying because I didn't fight back. There is no such thing to "keep away" or "ignore" bullies, if you are a weak victim, they will seek you out no matter where you are.

And remember the basic three tenets :

1. Teachers have their own rice bowl to protect so they cannot help you.
2. Counsellors are there for the rice in their bowls - they wouldn't be counselling kids like you if they are not retired or have better grades in their degrees.
3. The heat generated from the bullying will melt the principals' iron rice bowl. And they would rather expel/suspend you than to help you because they have a personal image to maintain, like most useless CEOs in major business organisations.

It is either the bully or the principal. It doesn't matter really if you are unlike me and have absolutely no friends - sometimes school administrators need that particular havoc to remind them that an iron rice bowl is heavy. And if you do feel that you have nothing to lose, why not?

The recipes for disasters are always readily available in chemistry textbooks.
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When three puppygirls named after pastries are on top of each other, it is called Eclair a'la menthe et Biscotti aux fraises avec beaucoup de Ricotta sur le dessus.
Most of all, you have to be disciplined and you have to save, even if you hate our current financial system. Because if you don't save, then you're guaranteed to end up with nothing.
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Old 2012-12-11, 11:17   Link #183
mystogan
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eragon View Post
A way(or rather my way)to take your mind off depressing thoughts or stop being an emo bitch is to go to an open place in the night, look at sky and ask yourself this - Wtf is the point of my life? I'm an insignificant being living on this insignificant planet, which revolves round an insignificant star, which is part of an insigficant galaxy. No one gives a damn if the earth vanished this moment.
When I think like that, my problems seem so petty that I feel stupid for brooding over them.
Of course this could also result in one getting even more depressed, in which case I am not responsible for any collatral damage caused because of this advise.
i don't see how your advice works or could help at all, but what i do......,*sigh*ok what i do can sound very very childish but what i do, is that i think about particular anime characters(eg.rock lee from naruto), i think that they became splendid through effort and struggle even when all the odds are against them, then i can do better too, it doesn't solve anything but atleast it helps for sometime.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RRW View Post
Oh ok, then try to be nice to other people. there has to be nice person somewhere in your area
i am always nice ok if not nice at least i am neutral and not hostile to others, it's not like i don't have any friends , what i said earlier was about 'most' of the people, i do find one or two friend somewhere somehow
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Old 2012-12-11, 11:22   Link #184
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
Heh this friend of mine is something like willx. Was a bloody genius, but got easily bored and had a fuse length of the circumfrence of Eclair's breasts. Always got into trouble in school, constant suspensions, but never fails to make it to the top 50 during mid-year and finalsin his school.

I guess that day he got sick of my moaning and wallowing in self-pity that he bashed me up. I had to admit it - I asked for the bullying because I didn't fight back. There is no such thing to "keep away" or "ignore" bullies, if you are a weak victim, they will seek you out no matter where you are.

And remember the basic three tenets :

1. Teachers have their own rice bowl to protect so they cannot help you.
2. Counsellors are there for the rice in their bowls - they wouldn't be counselling kids like you if they are not retired or have better grades in their degrees.
3. The heat generated from the bullying will melt the principals' iron rice bowl. And they would rather expel/suspend you than to help you because they have a personal image to maintain, like most useless CEOs in major business organisations.

It is either the bully or the principal. It doesn't matter really if you are unlike me and have absolutely no friends - sometimes school administrators need that particular havoc to remind them that an iron rice bowl is heavy. And if you do feel that you have nothing to lose, why not?

The recipes for disasters are always readily available in chemistry textbooks.
Luckily my (second) school is not like yours. My school gladly help student if they need help. even if they have to skip their teaching period.

obviously they not every where at any time. to solve that, my school have group of senior student that watch over the small one (I am one of them)

Quote:
Originally Posted by mystogan View Post
i am always nice ok if not nice at least i am neutral and not hostile to others, it's not like i don't have any friends , what i said earlier was about 'most' of the people, i do find one or two friend somewhere somehow
well that is not really enough I think. best way is just ignore them until they got tired
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Old 2012-12-11, 11:35   Link #185
mystogan
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Originally Posted by RRW View Post
well that is not really enough I think. best way is just ignore them until they got tired
that's what i still do, but the thing is that they never get tired, i might sound as if i am trying to cancel out anything good that you are telling me, but i am just telling the reality.

now of course i am not the only one who has such problems, many people have such problems, compared to it my problems might be small by a neutral perspective,i just turn a blind eye to these things and try not to think much over it,

but then there are always problems with everyone which just can't be ignored such as work, studies, love-life etc. etc.
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Old 2012-12-11, 11:42   Link #186
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Originally Posted by mystogan View Post
that's what i still do, but the thing is that they never get tired, i might sound as if i am trying to cancel out anything good that you are telling me, but i am just telling the reality.

now of course i am not the only one who has such problems, many people have such problems, compared to it my problems might be small by a neutral perspective,i just turn a blind eye to these things and try not to think much over it,

but then there are always problems with everyone which just can't be ignored such as work, studies, love-life etc. etc.
Not really. it sound similar to case that i heard before.

but yeah this case is kinda difficult one to solve. best one is to wait for something bad happens to them or you make one! of course you plan it so they don't strike back.

well as long is not crossing the line
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Old 2012-12-11, 11:45   Link #187
Eragon
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^ You sure are you aren't getting him into more trouble with that advise?
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Old 2012-12-11, 11:48   Link #188
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Originally Posted by Eragon View Post
^ You sure are you aren't getting him into more trouble with that advise?
hence

Quote:
of course you plan it so they don't strike back.


thought best way is to report to teacher/senior/elder.
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Old 2012-12-11, 12:00   Link #189
SaintessHeart
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mystogan View Post
i don't see how your advice works or could help at all, but what i do......,*sigh*ok what i do can sound very very childish but what i do, is that i think about particular anime characters(eg.rock lee from naruto), i think that they became splendid through effort and struggle even when all the odds are against them, then i can do better too, it doesn't solve anything but atleast it helps for sometime.
There is nothing wrong with that!

I have my own heroes, and that includes :

1. David Stirling - founder of the British SAS
2. Mizuki Nana - read her biography
3. Bruce Lee - zen-master of martial arts

They each have their own personalised method of fighting, using creativity, emotions and perserverance as base drivers. And they are all fighting to make a difference for themselves.

Don't be afraid of others laughing at you - there is something called "appeal to ridicule". People only laugh at others because they needed a face to show to maintain their personal image. And it is only an image - not a persona which is a mask that comes from the heart.

And one last thing - if you believed in "reality" you need to read more. It is a cliche based on perception; if it doesn't work for you, why perceive and believe it as that way, just simply because someone told you so?

Perception is just a way of explaining things. Don't be lazy and use someone else's crappy answer - think up of your own.

Quote:
Originally Posted by bigdeal000 View Post
Your reaction is over the top (try to chill ), but I get what you're saying and I agree. On the other hand I also think that insecure people can be emotionally suffocating so what my father said had a hint of truth - but it was way to exaggerated to just put all pessimists in such attention whore positions.
I know this is going to be insulting and net me a negrep, but nonetheless :

1. Do you bother to understand these people?
2. Do you have a solution to help them?
3. If not, it is obviously that you are too stupid to possess problem solving skills. Either that or you suck at time management when you said that you have got no time for them.

I like to insult "optimists" and "counsellors" who give this kind of BS. Not only it is a gratifying hobby to knock these "positively-charged people" off their unicorns, it also makes them reconsider ditching their comfort blanket and coming out to face what they have considered "impossible".

A prison counsellor whom I am working with in my second job taught me this - "impossible" is a consideration when you have run out of ideas, or you have reached a ethics barrier despite following your moral compass. And you have to suck really hard at thinking if you run out of ideas.
__________________

When three puppygirls named after pastries are on top of each other, it is called Eclair a'la menthe et Biscotti aux fraises avec beaucoup de Ricotta sur le dessus.
Most of all, you have to be disciplined and you have to save, even if you hate our current financial system. Because if you don't save, then you're guaranteed to end up with nothing.
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Old 2012-12-11, 12:00   Link #190
mystogan
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RRW View Post
hence

thought best way is to report to teacher/senior/elder.
well there isn't exactly a higher authority to whom you can report to but still, doing so will only make me a ..........(okay what is it called).......the one who can't even take a joke and ....reports to the authority, because it is fun for everyone except me, and after doing it, even the normal or neutral ones will give me a cold shoulder.

And about your advice, well i wouldn't waste my time on them but i do hope something bad happens to them
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Old 2012-12-11, 12:04   Link #191
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Originally Posted by mystogan View Post
well there isn't exactly a higher authority to whom you can report to but still, doing so will only make me a ..........(okay what is it called).......the one who can't even take a joke and ....reports to the authority, because it is fun for everyone except me, and after doing it, even the normal or neutral ones will give me a cold shoulder.

And about your advice, well i wouldn't waste my time on them but i do hope something bad happens to them
Actually i kinda give you bad advice so dont take that seriously.

what kind of bully we talking here? physical? mental? or "joke" bullying?
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Old 2012-12-11, 12:12   Link #192
mystogan
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Originally Posted by RRW View Post
Actually i kinda give you bad advice so dont take that seriously.

what kind of bully we talking here? physical? mental? or "joke" bullying?
can't exactly categorize, it has all been different-different throughout the years, anyway you don't need to get so worked up over it, as i said i have turned a blind eye towards these things and try not to think of it much,
Relax, i am not collapsing or anything, and these are just of my minor problems, i was just mentioning about these things
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Old 2012-12-11, 15:07   Link #193
bigdeal000
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
I know this is going to be insulting and net me a negrep, but nonetheless :

1. Do you bother to understand these people?
2. Do you have a solution to help them?
3. If not, it is obviously that you are too stupid to possess problem solving skills. Either that or you suck at time management when you said that you have got no time for them.

I like to insult "optimists" and "counsellors" who give this kind of BS. Not only it is a gratifying hobby to knock these "positively-charged people" off their unicorns, it also makes them reconsider ditching their comfort blanket and coming out to face what they have considered "impossible".

A prison counsellor whom I am working with in my second job taught me this - "impossible" is a consideration when you have run out of ideas, or you have reached a ethics barrier despite following your moral compass. And you have to suck really hard at thinking if you run out of ideas.
I thought of negreping you myself just for the hell of it but, no. Now, I suppose the first three question were about insecure people. You see, I saw such persons in the past, I think I understood them (you never know exactly what's inside their heads as they themselves tend to be pretty deluded). I mean, one of them had imaginary enemies: "You saw that girl, she hates me!!!" I was like, ok. Then I go and talk with the "hatter". No sign of anything. As to a solution. I tried something, but I failed. I tried to make that person have more confidence in herself, but alas, I did it the wrong way. Now she was like, omg, you're such a great guy, thank you for always supporting me. Then she gets closer to me, finds out I have flaws as well (go figure) and bam, mission failed. I'm no doctor and in the end, that person decided that talking to me is a waste of time, and ignored me completely -.- . As you can see I lack skills even though I kinda match point 1&2.
And there are people that simply don't give a rat's ass. There are people that are simply annoyed by weakness and they don't try to understand it. Do you really think that's stupidity? More like arrogance I'd say.
As to optimists, I dunno what to say. I never met such a hardcore optimist as the ones you talk about. The optimists I know are people that hope for the best (while trying to achieve it) and are aware of what "impossible" means.
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Old 2012-12-11, 15:17   Link #194
Dr. Casey
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eragon View Post
A way(or rather my way)to take your mind off depressing thoughts or stop being an emo bitch is to go to an open place in the night, look at sky and ask yourself this - Wtf is the point of my life? I'm an insignificant being living on this insignificant planet, which revolves round an insignificant star, which is part of an insigficant galaxy. No one gives a damn if the earth vanished this moment.
When I think like that, my problems seem so petty that I feel stupid for brooding over them.
Of course this could also result in one getting even more depressed, in which case I am not responsible for any collatral damage caused because of this advise.
I don't think this would work for me (It would probably just make me more confused and frustrated if anything), but watching episodes of whatever anime your avatar's from might do the trick. That chick's pretty hot imo
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Old 2012-12-11, 16:32   Link #195
Daniel E.
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Please, do not try to turn this into Social Thread part 2.

People posting memes, one liners, bad jokes and the like, will get their posts deleted.
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Old 2012-12-11, 16:40   Link #196
Kizoku Keenan
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I think the thing I have been saddest about this year was my family cat dying her name was KiKi and she got run down, is it silly to be gutted/depressed over the loss of a cat? :S
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Old 2012-12-11, 19:55   Link #197
LeoXiao
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Quote:
I think the thing I have been saddest about this year was my family cat dying her name was KiKi and she got run down, is it silly to be gutted/depressed over the loss of a cat? :S
I'd say no, unless you place more value in her than a human. What kind of cat was she?

Last edited by Daniel E.; 2012-12-11 at 20:15.
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Old 2012-12-11, 22:01   Link #198
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bigdeal000 View Post
It's not that bad you know. I had thoughts about it before (nothing serious) and I'm doing fine. Calm down...
Quote:
Originally Posted by bigdeal000 View Post
But the idea that even the slightest hint is a problem is an exaggeration IMO.
The problem is that this is an Internet forum, and it's often difficult to detect meaning and context just from words alone. (I've lost count of the number of times people on AnimeSuki fail to realise I'm being sarcastic or facetious, for example.)

When it comes to talking about thoughts of suicide, I'd be very worried about how I should treat such comments. Is it just a passing thought that can be dispelled with pep talk? Or is it really a sign of something more serious that I should pay attention to?

The absolute last thing I would want to do is laugh away something that is eating away the affected person; he or she may be too caught up with his or her troubles to talk openly about them in a public forum.

I have experienced two cases where friends, relatives and I panicked over disturbing posts we saw online.

The first case was triggered by an online friend from MMORPG Final Fantasy XI. We were close enough that we knew each other's real names and had communicated by voice. My guild mates and I knew for a while that she was going through a hard patch, and so we were badly alarmed when she suddenly said things that implied she was going to take her own life. We frantically tried to get in touch with her, and I went to the extent of calling her university's liaison officer.

The second case involved my own brother, who is known for his sudden temper and mood swings. A cousin called me one day to alert me about a Facebook post he made: "I'm so tired of it all. Goodbye everyone."

Yup, another series of frantic phone calls ensued.

Both cases turned out to be false alarms, but I echo Hasumi's point: as outsiders, we won't know what's really going on unless we know you and talk to you in person. A few stray words in a text forum can mean virtually anything. That being the case, I'd much rather err on the side of caution than to regret later that I did nothing when I could have.
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Old 2012-12-12, 04:00   Link #199
Masuzu
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I've seen bullying brought up a couple times here.

Personally I think I got lucky, not because I wasn't bullied (I was), but because I took it better than some people.

I've had a number of bullies in my early days, some of them I can't even remember.

I was bullied in many ways, big and small. But since I was so young I guess big or small didn't matter.

Right now I don't blame any of them anymore, I understand why they did that and it would be pointless to hold a grudge all these years.

Back then I bullied other kids smaller than me as a result of being bullied. That's why I understand it and I don't blame them.

I can't take back anything I did back then, and it's the same for them so it's better to just leave it at that.

We all learned something from it anyway.
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Old 2013-01-24, 20:55   Link #200
DonQuigleone
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I've been thinking a bit, and I have to say that modern western media does a very poor job of representing what mental illness is really like. Either the mentally ill person is a raving murdering lunatic, or is a melodramatic teenager cutting themselves and threatening their parents with suicide. The same goes for Movies, TV and video games. For example, I've never seen a mainstream game where characters spend a substantial amount of time a realistic depiction of depression.

However, I find Anime and Manga to have much more nuanced depictions of mental illness (along with a fair number of crazed lunatics). For instance, going on with the video game example, the video games Persona 3 and 4 has many fairly grounded realistic depictions of mental illness and depression (and also crazed lunatics ).

Furthermore, I think western culture isn't very accepting of mental illness, while Otaku culture is a bit more tolerant and empathetic of psychological "deviancy".

I find Anime, Manga and certain Japanese video games have helped me when I've been feeling low in a way that western stuff never does, as I feel a certain sense of empathy there "I'm not the only person who's depressed, these people also get depressed, maybe I'm not so weird! And look this guy is able to deal with and help save the world!"

Thoughts anyone?
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