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Old 2013-04-23, 18:20   Link #161
Vexx
Obey the Darkly Cute ...
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: On the whole, I'd rather be in Kyoto ...
Age: 57
I've run into some problems threading a few plot lines together. Current version of next chapter just reads awkwardly. So I'll going to be a day or two late.

In the mean time, I have a spray of small images to divert your attention from that train wreck. Larger versions of each pic available in my album of IRIRS photos.

Hank & Sashiko:


Tsika:


Kpau:


Glycerin:

Last edited by Vexx; 2013-04-23 at 23:59.
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Old 2013-04-25, 14:37   Link #162
Vexx
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Okay, this chapter turned out to be a little bit of an experiment. I was playing around with relatively quick cuts to move between relatively simultaneous events. If I did it right, it should play out like a fairly tightly edited television episode or something. The content is mostly light or humorous except for one thread with a few moments of pathos.

Posting it up in a few minutes.
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Old 2013-04-25, 16:00   Link #163
Vexx
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Chapter 03 "Tainted Love" Part One

Chapter 03 “Tainted Love”

TL;DR…
vol 03 ch 03 part one content
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Part Two continues in next post (hit 50000 char limit again).

Last edited by Vexx; 2013-04-25 at 16:04. Reason: stupid 50K post limit
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Old 2013-04-25, 16:03   Link #164
Vexx
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Chapter 03 "Tainted Love" Part Two

Chapter 03 "Tainted Love" Part Two

TL;DR…
vol 03 ch 03 part two content
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Old 2013-04-25, 16:53   Link #165
synaesthetic
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god so behind...

I'm going to catch up on this sometime this week but crazy craziness abounds with school and trying to get my book ready for the Kindle Store...
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Old 2013-04-25, 17:35   Link #166
Vexx
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Quote:
Originally Posted by synaesthetic View Post
god so behind...

I'm going to catch up on this sometime this week but crazy craziness abounds with school and trying to get my book ready for the Kindle Store...
Tell me how that goes. I'm whacking away on the rewrite of the first volume (which will probably be vol 1 and 2 together) and looking at several distribution channel possibilities.
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Old 2013-04-26, 18:28   Link #167
Vexx
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Author's notes, comments, and babble time

I feel like I pulled a "Megatokyo" or a "Katanagatari" in NOT showing the heart-to-heart chat between Tsika, Glyc, and Blar as it happened (kind of like not showing the duel itself, just the aftermath). I think that might have been quite interesting as a story sequence the more I think about it.

I'll blame self-imposed deadline and material that might belong across two chapters instead of crammed into one. I wanted a tight focus on the Sashiko plot thread so I stuck with that. If I don't keep to my self-imposed deadlines, I'll spiral into a deep pit of "not finishing stuff".

When I rewrite this section for publishing, I'm very likely to substantially expand and alter the whole "Tainted Love" sequence into two chapters worth of story and include the part of the day Tsika/Blar/Glyc spent trying to hash their lives out.

Right now, my rewrite of volume 1 has gotten fairly significant in terms of expansion and tweaking. I had several people find Blar stalking Tsika a little too creepy as it was. So I took some input from them and made some changes that I think actually makes the storyline more amusing and realistic (as a hint - they're actually sort of stalking each other now - just using very different tactics). Changes like that permeate most of the early chapters now. I may dial back the explicit sex scenes or adjust the terminology - just so I don't run into anyone getting "50 Shades of Gray" bashful about reading.

Also, I'm becoming convinced that the rough draft "vol 1 and 2" are going to end up being one single larger volume after the rewrite. "Start of the Band" all the way to heading to the airport for "Off to Japan" makes a much more satisfying read than just chopping off before the retreat or just after Glycerin's psychological revelations. It also puts the two secondary characters into the picture frame and sets up (hopefully) desire to purchase the next volume of the adventure in Japan (heh).

I reviewed the Kindle store operation -- suddenly that looks like a more attractive option for an initial release but still need to review the fine print.

Actually my biggest issue at the moment is still illustrations. I want to use illustrations. I've been playing with DAZ but I'll end up spending as much money buying DLC with it as I might just commissioning art. Also looking at some tricks of doing my own art. I even wrote Harmonix to ask if what the options were for using Rockband screen captures (I figure the answer is no, but who knows until you ask).

edit: Surprisingly, I had a back and forth conversation with Harmonix. They liked the idea but in the end they just didn't have a licensing framework and they were sketchy about adult situations being directly connected with the product (since the franchise is "PG-13" so to speak). I was just happy they took me seriously. So I'll have to have original artwork -- back to DAZ probably.

Last edited by Vexx; 2013-06-06 at 02:26.
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Old 2013-04-27, 05:37   Link #168
Vexx
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Something for over the weekend, two videos to highlight the changes from before Blar met the band to the present moment in Japan.

Sashiko leading the band It Really IS Rocket Science through a cover of 'Get Free' at the Voodoo Lounge in Fukuoka.
YouTube
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And a flashback to nine months earlier, the band The Lost Girls one week before Blar met Tsika in the snowstorm (before Sashiko got herself fired). A small gig in Portland.
YouTube
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The style of outfits, Glycerin's hair and expressions, her gawkiness - various changes over the nine months of the story so far.

Last edited by Vexx; 2013-04-28 at 17:27.
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Old 2013-04-29, 11:24   Link #169
Vexx
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Join Date: Dec 2005
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The next chapter will be out Wednesday or Thursday due to some extra paying work I picked up. A couple of screen shots I captured for reference.

Size reference for Glyc and Blar, dark Glyc style (in heels, she's actually a hair taller than Blar)


Heh, might make a decent album cover -

"Confidence Means Willingness to Execute Intent"

Last edited by Vexx; 2013-04-29 at 11:44.
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Old 2013-05-03, 13:32   Link #170
Vexx
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Well, crud - paying work took longer than expected. Will try to have next chapter out on Monday.

As penance, here's Dark Glyc and her minions doing a Lacuna Coil cover of Swamped. This one reminds me how tall she is compared to the others and those long legs and scary eyes Managed to catch some nice imagery in it. Tsika also has a lot of energy playing her bass in this one.

YouTube
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Last edited by Vexx; 2013-05-03 at 14:42.
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Old 2013-05-04, 04:01   Link #171
Vexx
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Sigh, made some progress tonight - six pages. Some days entire chapters roll out in one swoosh, other days just getting a paragraph out is like shoveling wet mud. Six pages a day plus review/edits, erk.

The band is getting a new coordinator for the next few towns as Kobayashi hands them off. In the meantime, here's a size reference shot of Glycerin (5'11"+) and Tsika (4'10"). Glycerin has heels on. She has to wear flats if Tsika is to have any chance of mashing her face into Glycerin's cleavage.

Glycerin and her pretty doll Tsika play a duet.
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Old 2013-05-05, 19:45   Link #172
Vexx
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Six more pages ... have a Motorhead classic metal cover by the band one goofy late night.

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Old 2013-05-13, 20:02   Link #173
Vexx
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Sorry, I got halfway into this chapter and hated the way it was going -- pulling back and rewriting it. Some important plot points I want to get right without too much foreshadow.

Another diversionary video - one of the concert's in Japan doing a cover of a Roxette tune.

YouTube
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I'll see if I can get the chapter out by "close of business tomorrow" bleh.
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Old 2013-05-14, 22:47   Link #174
Vexx
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Chapter 04 "Kiss Them For Me" Part One

Chapter 04 “Kiss Them For Me”

TL;DR…
volume 03 chapter 04 part 01 content
Sorry; dynamic content not loaded. Reload?

Part Two continues in next post.

Last edited by Vexx; 2013-05-15 at 23:23.
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Old 2013-05-14, 22:49   Link #175
Vexx
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Chapter 04 "Kiss Them For Me" Part Two

Part two of chapter, continuation of prior post

TL;DR…
vol 03 chap 04 part 02 content
Sorry; dynamic content not loaded. Reload?

Still feels kind of flaky and sketchy, interactions with Sakaki and some moments in Hank's photo hike missing. But I need to focus for a few days on my rewrite of Volume 01 and 02. (Almost done with v1 and halfway through v2).
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Old 2013-05-20, 20:26   Link #176
Vexx
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On a small USO jog in the tour, Hank the band's light/sound engineer loses a bet and has to sing a couple of songs for the troops. He chooses a couple of tunes relevant to the story. Here's one --

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Blar and Glycerin coax Snake into singing an entire song --

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I'm going to be a bit quiet for the next week or so, some work contracts that involve travel. I'm going to focus on Volume 1 and 2 rewrites during my evenings and see if I can get ahead on Volume 3 (the japan tour).

Hmm, my rewritten version of Volume One currently stands at just over 200 pages, ending when the band drives off to Big Sur and the music retreat.

Last edited by Vexx; 2013-05-20 at 21:17.
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Old 2013-05-23, 15:43   Link #177
Vexx
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Studying up on copyright issues with using extracts of song lyrics. Apparently, it can get pretty stupid to even invoke a few words explicitly referencing the song without permission.

I may seek out permission on "No Rain" from Blind Melon and see how that goes. Otherwise, I'll either need to write parody/satirical lyrics or rework the scenes so that the reader may be able to guess the song but it isn't explicitly referenced.

I *think* I can use song titles as my chapter dividers as I have been but even that seems problematic according to some -- even mentioning which tunes the band is playing may get interesting. The author Robert Aspirin often used quotes by famous people to open each chapter of his Myth-Adventure series but again, this is the music industry where jackasses in suits own the exhaled breath of many artists.

We'll see how it goes. This book appears to be somewhat essential if I pursue the use of extracts or references. http://www.nolo.com/products/getting...ion-riper.html
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Old 2013-06-05, 18:11   Link #178
Vexx
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Sorry. Kind of fell off the train there for a couple of weeks. I spent it (besides RL interrupts) making rewrite passes on Volume 1 and volume 2. Volume 1 is about 200 pages and volume 2 is nearly twice that -- kind of surprised me.

About halfway through chapter five of Volume three today. New rule for myself - never take a long break from a story thread, its much harder than taking breaks in between major story arcs.

The group is doing their Hatsukaichi shrine concert at the moment and is about to head for a USO one-night gig. Here's a video extract of the USO performance. The girls dressed a bit naughty for the special forces guys.

Kpau belts out a bulletproof song.
YouTube
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Sashiko takes a shot at being sexy o.O
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Last edited by Vexx; 2013-06-05 at 18:34.
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Old 2013-06-07, 04:22   Link #179
Vexx
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: On the whole, I'd rather be in Kyoto ...
Age: 57
Volume 03 Chapter 05 Part 01 ("Hells Bells")

Material - adult situations, NSFW in this chapter

Spoiler for vol 03 ch 05 part 01 content:


Volume 03 Chapter 05 Part Two continued in next post.

-->The damned BB Code tags don't seem to be working no matter what browser I use - switching to SPOILER tag for now. getting tired of fighting with these codes because I used an italic or some hidden character blows them up.

Okay, I'll probably get some "what the hell?" out of this chapter but I had some fun writing it. I re-arranged a couple of plot points from a bit further in to make one big raucous night for everyone in the band. Some pathos but lots of "adult situation" and hopefully amusement.

Last edited by Vexx; 2013-08-31 at 17:13. Reason: BB CODE tags are failing like IMAGES and TL;DR
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Old 2013-06-07, 04:25   Link #180
Vexx
Obey the Darkly Cute ...
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: On the whole, I'd rather be in Kyoto ...
Age: 57
Volume 03 Chapter 05 Part 02 ("Hells Bells")

Material - adult situations, NSFW in this chapter

Spoiler for vol 03 ch 05 part 02 content:

Okay, I'll probably get some "what the hell?" out of this chapter but I had some fun writing it. I re-arranged a couple of plot points from a bit further in to make one big raucous night for everyone in the band. Some pathos but lots of "adult situation" and hopefully amusement.

edit: oh, here's a great list of TEN STUPID WRITER TRICKS to improve writing - http://ht.ly/lN8yc
edit: also, this book has been a stellar source of "how the music business works" because that's basically the title.
All You Need To Know About the Music Business by Donald S. Passman. (the 8th ed.)

It is modern, discusses the various routes a band might take, how much things costs, how much people cost, how much a band might expect to make from a gig to a tour to a record deal, etc. Great resource. for writing or for actually getting into the business of music.

Last edited by Vexx; 2013-06-23 at 01:45. Reason: BB CODE tags are failing like IMAGES and TL;DR
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