Brother has become an addict, getting really angry and frustrated.

[Irenicus]

Oh, and, err, don't try to talk serious stuff with him while he's blasting through the game. I know that's pretty much his entire schedule, but... you need to pre-empt him somewhere else somehow.

People -- including me, actually, though I don't punch my siblings when interrupted (wow, that little...) -- gets very annoyed very quickly if they're interrupted during an activity as mentally consuming as a videogame, especially if it's for a "big" thing like a discussion you meant to have with him. And this is CS, his adrenaline's pumping and he's probably screaming like a German Kid (tm), you won't be able to do much here before he starts acting like he did to you.

As for real advice beyond this, I don't think I can offer more. I mean, I can armchair it through, but I'd rather people who actually know what they're talking about be the ones offering you advice.

[Thingle]

Don't tell him what to do and leave him alone, unless it's not him who pays the electric bill. He looks over 18 anyway.... or make him pitch in at next month's bill

[Gin]

he's going through puberty and he has a whole buncha hormones running through his veins. this doesn't really sound like unnatural behavior, sounds to me like your brother changed when you went to college and you are having trouble accepting that. if you want to still be friends with your brother, you should ask to play with him

[HayashiTakara]

So I'm guessing you're the older brother right? Well do what older brothers do best, beat the snot out of him until he gets it.

[Kylaran]

I'm a firm believer in the idea that individuals must overcome things of their own accord. You can give them whatever advice you want, you can bother them as much as you want, you can anger them as much as you want, but, in the end, most of it will be futile.

What's important is that something changes his life; finding a way to make him notice his own problem or find a way to get him obsessed with something else might be one of the best ways to solve his current problem. I woke up from a recent spurt of WoW playing (curse you Ulduar) because my grades were dropping significantly - the next week I skipped a few raids to study. It took me a couple of weeks to realize my own addiction, but no one could convince me of the problems I was having (weight gain, no social life) until I myself had become convinced of it.

However, before you attempt anything extreme to try and change your brother's life, you should make sure this habit is long-term. As others in this thread have mentioned, it is natural to fall into a period of immersion in a particular hobby or interest. It happens to all of us, despite how often we hear of people telling us to "balance" our lives.

And in regards to his friends: I hope by you don't mean drug dealing kids (and by drug dealing, I mean the hard stuff) involved in crime (I have the impression they just do "stupid" things and you don't seem to like their attitudes or their intelligence.) because that's just about the only real kind of friends I don't think are wanted. You don't need bright friends with perfect attitudes to necessarily have them be meaningful friends. I may dislike some of the habits of my friends (and some of them act the same way as your brother's friends), but we can spend a lot of meaningful moments together and we've been through some serious stuff as a group.

[Comrade]

I had a similar problem. My brother was addicted to WOW a couple of years back. And the symptoms were pretty much the same, he wouldn't go anywhere, he got pissed off when someone tried to talk to him and he only left his room to go to the bathroom or get something to eat.
Of course the thing is that unlike you I don't really care about what he does in his free time, so I didn't even try to straighten him out.
Anyway, I think that it's only a phase. Since my brother eventually dropped the game himself. Of course it took him about two years, but the thing is he's not playing WOW anymore.
Anyway if you're not willing to wait until he drops the game by himself, you can always punch his lights out, delete the game, set up a password or just take out the computer.
It might sound cruel, but torturing people who are addicted to certain games is hell of a lot fun.

[Westlo]

Break his fingers, problem solved.

[Justin Kim]

Originally Posted by Claies

[EDIT]: I'll use Irenicus's words on the post behind me: I'm armchairing. Don't think that I have experience. I'm just offering ideas and none of them are guaranteed to work.

Well...there are several ways in.

The first one is to focus on the parents and have them realize that your little brother is deep trouble waiting to happen, and buying him game accessories to cut his crap in the short run calls for disaster in the long run. If they look so hopeless right now they've probably tried and gave up for a little. Feel free to start tough and ask bluntly whether they care about his future, and depending on their answer you can figure out what angle to attack that problem with.

If they dodge the issue, keep asking. If they sit down and explain themselves to you, then you know they just want some help from you. If they tell you off, that means they gave up at some point and need some hard motivation. I'll have to think a little bit about what happens after that, I'll get back to you.

The second way is to focus on your brother instead. In terms of practical solutions, if he likes plinking terrorists so much, try introducing him to airsoft. I'm serious. Offer to take him and his real-life friends, however little there are, to an airsoft field nearby. Find a good one. Pay for his rental gear and admission fee, don't give him any excuse to back off. If you can get the kid into it, airsoft has the following good points:

- It's fun. The thing about airsoft is if you really love guns and fighting in video games, standing in the field holding realistic-looking weapons with friends around you makes you act up.

- It gets the kid off the computer.

- If you play outdoors frequently, you get really fit. You're wearing 5-10 pounds of equipment on terrain.

And maybe you'll like it too. It's an awesome sport. I hope to play with my friends a bit this summer, because one of them lives near this big creek with lots of trees and foliage. The first time I played, I learned that camouflage actually matters. Oh, and the guns weigh like a bitch.

Coincidentally enough, he has started playing with airsoft gun. Which practically made the situation more worse. I mean honestly, all he has been talking about is model gun types and how fast they can shoot. A friends house is pretty much an airsoft battleground to imitate the many gestures of killing counter-terriosts or terriosts. My brother is not fit at all from that, rather, it just fuels his addiction to play even further. He has nearly shot me with an airsoft gun before, until I tackled him...(that gun was really dangerous, one of those electric semi-automatic p90s you buy at the stores).

But everyone I appreciate your advice, and I will take every reply into consideration and act upon it. Thanks for the support Suki!

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by Justin Kim

Coincidentally enough, he has started playing with airsoft gun. Which practically made the situation more worse. I mean honestly, all he has been talking about is model gun types and how fast they can shoot. A friends house is pretty much an airsoft battleground to imitate the many gestures of killing counter-terriosts or terriosts. My brother is not fit at all from that, rather, it just fuels his addiction to play even further. He has nearly shot me with an airsoft gun before, until I tackled him...(that gun was really dangerous, one of those electric semi-automatic p90s you buy at the stores).

But everyone I appreciate your advice, and I will take every reply into consideration and act upon it. Thanks for the support Suki!

It is not that BAD. I was conscripted and I could handle a few firearms without being taught. All thanks to google.

What comes with such dangerous knowledge has to come with a sense of justice, and where your allegiances lie. Indiscriminate killing shouldn't be the way of life. In fact, war should only exist in computer games.

Whatever it is, here is something you might want to learn. When confronted with a live firearm, always try to get it pointed away from you. Then push back the charging handle of the weapon (prevents the firing pin from striking the primer), release the magazine quickly to unload the weapon. Makes it less dangerous this way.

Confront him with facts that CS and Airsoft guns do not reflect real life firearms. I fired an airsoft P226 and real one, both are so starkly different.

Since he likes killing so much, why not convince him to join the army?

[Kakashi]

He needs to be given a little perspective. As long as he's always stuck in his room (his own little world) he won't be very responsive to agitation from you or anyone. That simply means you should encourage him get out more (fresh air makes people more rational), in the process adding more variety to his routine. Focusing single-mindedly on one thing all day does tend to have the side-effects you referred to, it's not healthy, even if we all do it.

That said, most kids go through this kind of "compulsive gamer" phase at some point in their lives. I sure as hell did, and soon burnt out.

[Justin Kim]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

It is not that BAD. I was conscripted and I could handle a few firearms without being taught. All thanks to google.

What comes with such dangerous knowledge has to come with a sense of justice, and where your allegiances lie. Indiscriminate killing shouldn't be the way of life. In fact, war should only exist in computer games.

Whatever it is, here is something you might want to learn. When confronted with a live firearm, always try to get it pointed away from you. Then push back the charging handle of the weapon (prevents the firing pin from striking the primer), release the magazine quickly to unload the weapon. Makes it less dangerous this way.

Confront him with facts that CS and Airsoft guns do not reflect real life firearms. I fired an airsoft P226 and real one, both are so starkly different.

Since he likes killing so much, why not convince him to join the army?

The army? Well maybe, considering he likes to shoot terriosts so much. Possibly the real-life aspect of war will have a psychological change on his mind. But no, I would detain my brother instead, and I am pretty sure war would just make the situation even worse. War is Hell. Why would I send him to a war that will possibly do nothing at all for the global society. Look at history back then every war was fought but that did not end conflicts. Wars will always continue until humans learn that we are all of the same kind. Just stupid conflicts, senseless rage, and killing. My brother needs to learn exactly what the real-life world is. Not shooting me with an air-soft gun or picking up a real gun. Besides he is underweight, god knows how badly he will get smoked in camps.

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by Justin Kim

The army? Well maybe, considering he likes to shoot terriosts so much. Possibly the real-life aspect of war will have a psychological change on his mind. But no, I would detain my brother instead, and I am pretty sure war would just make the situation even worse. War is Hell. Why would I send him to a war that will possibly do nothing at all for the global society. Look at history back then every war was fought but that did not end conflicts. Wars will always continue until humans learn that we are all of the same kind. Just stupid conflicts, senseless rage, and killing. My brother needs to learn exactly what the real-life world is. Not shooting me with an air-soft gun or picking up a real gun. Besides he is underweight, god knows how badly he will get smoked in camps.

I am underweight too! Yet I can carry a full load about 3/4 my weight and walk 24km. It is the training he gets that toughens him up, and that spirit that keeps him alive.

War may not end conflicts, but it serves as a reminder now and then to knock sense into the heads of slacking generations. Vietnam may be controversial, but it serves as a reminder to people and armed forces slacking off after WWII and 38th Parallel that there are still assholes out there on both sides waiting for people to kick them.

Come to think of it, at least it proves that your brother is still masculine, and not being a metrosexual dress-up doll all by himself.

[Claies]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

Since he likes killing so much, why not convince him to join the army?

No. The more I read about his personality, the more I'm convinced that if given a firearm he'll commit a terrible crime with it.

My next suggestion is to make the best of this massive motivation to play and tell your brother to go competitive. If he's good at it, maybe he'll learn teamwork. If he sucks at it, well, he'll give up.

[Jazzrat]

Looks like you got the typical spoilt younger brother with a bit of violent tendecies.
Well I don't know whether my way is right or wrong for you but my spoilt lil brother takes my threat seriously.





.............because i carry them out.

[chikorita157]

I wouldn't suggest sending him to war because everyone knows that it would effect the mind drastically. Sending your brother to war would be bad and wouldn't be the best suggestion.

I suggest calling his school's school psychologist and/or seek family help so that your brother can get out of video game addiction. Video game addiction is very difficult to get out, but it's possible to rid of self with help. I suggest not tampering with his laptop and the internet connection until you finally seek help for him.

[Amray]

He has his life and you have yours.

[OceanBlue]

Well, disclaimer: I have no idea what I'm talking about. I'm just agreeing with other people.
First off, make sure it's an addiction. As others have said, it could be a phase. Also, you mentioned that he's obsessed with becoming an administrator, but that you didn't really know. Try to figure out why he wants to play so much. It could be that it's fun to him, but there could also be an added factor that, if he were an administrator [I'm not sure if you meant that he was an administrator or if he wanted to become one.], he'd feel an enormous amount of pressure coming from himself to meet that responsibility. It'll be easier to figure out what's wrong if you try to understand what's going on.
I agree with those who are saying not to disconnect his internet connection or mess up his computer. Right now, probably, he sees you as someone who wants to interfere with what he enjoys doing, which is playing games. You could force him away from his game, but he'll just turn to something else with the same disposition [which I see he already has] that he's had before. I agree with those that say to introduce him to other things, which could probably be an easier way to get him to change his thinking. It'll be difficult if he doesn't like going outside, but it's better than forcing him off. You can't influence his opinion if he has you marked as an obstruction, an annoyance, or someone who's trying to make things worse for him.

Just some thoughts from me, I guess.

[Vexx]

Lets switch the scenario... someone likes to play golf... a LOT, to the extent they fail to execute the other activities of life like paying the bills, staying employed, doing well in school, doing their chores. They get angry and violent when told those other duties have some priority. They have swung a golf club at a family member.

What would you do? It isn't that you want him to stop playing but he doesn't seem to be having fun doing it either. The safety of other family members or anyone he interacts with becomes an issue.

Probably the best person to connect with him and "bring him down" is someone who plays what he likes to play... but has their act together.

[bungmonkey]

Take a video of him while he's playing without him realizing it, start to annoy him so he flips out, upload vid to youtube, let nasty comments roll in, ???, profit!

[Solafighter]

Originally Posted by bungmonkey

Take a video of him while he's playing without him realizing it, start to annoy him so he flips out, upload vid to youtube, let nasty comments roll in, ???, profit!

I dont think thats a good idea, though.