When the Flower Became a Flame
Ran Gotanda was not a shallow girl. All she was, was bored. She always had good grades, always was one of the first picks when it came to PE. She could apply for scholarship either academic or athletic, no problems there. A lot of people liked her because she was pretty easy to approach since she wasn't the top of the ladder when it came to school heirarchy. She took up the position of class representative without much protest because it seemed everyone expected it of her. However, she never really paid them any mind. What was important to her was not important to anyone else, she did what she liked on her own time and cared only for what she liked. Everyone was moving forward, she just danced with the wind, not changing, neither wilting nor blooming.
But one day her life changed, or perhaps it was just how she looked at life that changed. She didn't exactly meet him the first time, she just saw him. Ran was pulled by her mother that sunday to watch the sports festival in Dan's, Ran's brother, middle school. Ran didn't want to go, she'd rather be elsewhere because such a place was too raucous for her tastes. But Mrs. Gotanda was adamant to have the whole family together to see Dan in the soccer game. Ran was in a bad mood that day but she was much too terrified of her mother to protest.
When the game started, Ran found little interest in it. Running around, kicking a ball, trying to get it past someone who was covering the net. She really didn't get why everyone was screaming out their lungs. Mrs. Gotanda in particular kept tugging on Ran's sleeve and pointed out Dan whenever he had the ball. Ran would actually follow that line of sight but during one play, she noticed that whenever Dan had the ball, there was one particular boy that followed.
The boy had black hair and a fit frame but from the way he moved, she could tell he was forcing himself. It didn't seem like he had much stamina. Still, he was quite good and moved with equal pace to Dan who seemed fresh as a daisy. They would pass the ball between each other to confuse their opposing guards. The black-haired boy would usually double-over after every play but as soon as Dan came, he'd stand upright again and laugh off the worried look Ran's brother gave. Ran kept her eyes on the boy from then on and they didn't leave till the end of the game. After the game ended in their loss, the black-haired boy was the first one to fall over and the last one to laugh as their whole team huddled together in an effort to cheer each other up. But Ran also noticed, he was the one who had the biggest and most sincere smile.
The Gotanda's met up with Dan right off the side of the field. The Gotanda's were finally introduced to the black-haired boy and vice-versa. His name was Orimura Ichika, a name her brother would often mention at their home. He seemed pretty plain to Ran and she couldn't fathom why her eyes were glued to him the whole time.
Ichika noticed her stare and asked if there was anything on his face. Ran shook her head and denied such a thing, her face suddenly felt warm and she was mildly aware that she was blushing. She was annoyed by it and by the person who made her blush in the first place. She almost felt like throttling him. The look on his face on her change in mood was confused at first but it settled back to a goofy smile that he greeted them with. Really, what was so fun about this? Didn't they just lose?
"Why are you so happy?"
Ran was surprised that she'd said that out loud. She tried to think of a way to make it sound like they misheard but Ichika answered before she could correct herself.
"Because it was fun."
This flabbergasted Ran. Ichika's team lost, that is not fun. Losing is not fun. The game itself was boring, winning was the only redeeming feature.
"Do you really like soccer that much?", she'd asked him.
Ichika shook his head, "Not really. I don't actually play much sports now.". He seemed embarrassed as he admitted to this.
"Then why are you so happy?"
The young man was taken aback by the strength behind the words. It seemed he'd managed to annoy another young girl and he had no idea how to deal with it, so he just spelled out his feeling honestly. "I'm pretty happy because I gave it my all.". The puzzled disbelieving look on Ran's face prompted Ichika to continue, "I'm happy because I did everything I could to try and win. Even though we lost, I don't have any regrets. So when I think back to the things we did to get here, all I'll find are happy memories.". It still seemed that Ran didn't understand. "I can't get any clearer than that.", Ichika raised his hands to placate her.
Dan suddenly pushed into their conversation and jokingly warned Ichika to stop talking to Ran, lest he suffer the fate of being beaten up by a girl a year younger. Ran got angry at this and ended up chasing Dan half-way through the field and proceeded to beat him into submission, that is until their mother intervened a few seconds later.
The sports festival ended and Ran was stuck to watch every single event her brother was involved in, including basketball and three-man relay to name a few. She didn't think it was too bad though, the whole time her eyes were on Ichika. She watched him run, watched him play, watched him pour everything into what he did. For some reason, she had started to cheer for him too.
Back at home, Ichika was invited to eat dinner with the family. Ran was seated beside Ichika with Dan on the other side. The two friends were chatting boisterously making Ran feel a bit uncomfortable. It seemed Ichika noticed this and asked if she was alright. She quickly answered that she was alright. Ran's heart was hammering, she could feel it beat against its cage. She didn't know why but she disliked letting the boy know she was bothered. She poised herself and began to eat. It was weird for her to notice that she was being very docile as she ate, normally she'd be fighting with Dan over pieces of meat and the few good vegies. Some members of her family noticed and asked if she was alright, Ran could only nod and tell them not to worry because she wasn't aware of anything herself. She was just very aware that there was Ichika right beside her.
Ran reached for a slice of chashu and her hands touched with Ichika's as he was getting a piece as well. Ran dropped her chopsticks as she retracted her hand like it was electrified. Ichika apologized for getting in her way but she brushed it off and said it was fine.
After dinner, Ran quickly retreated to her room and sealed herself in. What was happening? Why was she like this? She sunk to her knees, back barricading the door from any unwanted entry. She thought about the day, the sports festival, the events, about the roar of the crowd, the excitement in the air... and the passion of a boy. Ran's eyes snapped into focus as her mind suddenly created a clear image of Ichika. Why was he there? Why did she remember him so clearly? His eyes were still glittering with amusement, his smile was still happy, even though he looked flush from exhaustion and was about to collapse any minute. Why was she so fixated on that image in her mind?
"I'm happy because I did everything I could to try and win. Even though we lost, I don't have any regrets. So when I think back to the things we did to get here, all I'll find are happy memories."
She remembers his words. They're stupid, but she clings to them. She recalls her own achievements, her victories and awards, all the praises she received. They all feel so hollow. Why? Because she never really cared, never really tried to. She just did them. She wanted to smile, just like him; to be happy, just like him.
"Ichika."
she said his name with a blush.
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Years later, someone asked Ran why she fell in love with Ichika Orimura. She told them it was because he looked cool doing sports. Ran omitted that it was he who made her what she was today. Some would call her shallow, her brother called her stubborn for holding a crush this long. But they all didn't understand, Ichika taught her how to give everything for something. He taught Ran to be passionate. It was with this passion right now that she vowed to be Ichika's beloved.
2011-12-31, 08:41
By the way, why does Fuuko hate men?
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