AnimeSuki Forums

Nightengale · 2012-01-03, 04:13

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nanya01

I wasn't the only one who thought of something like that, right?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skane

What?

Best thing about it? Both of them can co-exist and be true at the same time.

Spoiler:

Skane · 2012-01-09, 10:00

Before the TSAB was formed...

A bright kingdom named Al-Hazard existed for the Relics.

An industrious realm for the Belkans.

And a non-administrated world called Earth.

But Signum, leader of the Wolkenritters, destroyed the Earth using Lost Logia... or so it was claimed.

Shadowy TSAB Council: "You have betrayed our trust in you, Captain."

To spare her sister from oblivion, a second Ace strode forth. And her name...

... was FATE.

*epic guitar strumming*

Jail: "I see you, Fate Testarossa. You offer so little."
Fate: "I have an offer in mind."

*more epic guitar strumming*

Will she seal Earth's fate? Or a new destiny?

Koveras Alvane · 2012-01-09, 12:43

I see what you did with the scythe.

MeisterBabylon · 2012-01-10, 00:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nightengale

Best thing about it? Both of them can co-exist and be true at the same time.

Spoiler:

and Orenji-kun.

Akiyoshi · 2012-01-10, 23:17

Some shadowy burglars are scaping after robbing a TSAB facility....

Agito: Freeze!

Signum: Laevatein!

Laevatein: Sturmwinde!

*The stream of flames reached the vehicle but the flames suddenly dissapear after one of the guys reveals having a Divider*

Agito: That won't work Signum! your flames don't work on them!

Signum: Not again! They don't seem to work on ANYTHING these days!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Taking a page of Riza Hawkeye's book xDU

ZeroIchiNi · 2012-01-10, 23:51

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nightengale

Spoiler:

Spoiler for reply:

Arcc · 2012-01-14, 02:16

Another delightful trailer parody for your consumption. Original here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oh-roZLH61c

Disclaimer- as I wrote this and figured out how it would work, this thing got really grimdark. Please don't hate me too much.

Scene opens on a man being patted down at a Bureau security checkpoint.

In the not too distant future. . .

Flash images of mages and cyborgs battling, and a TSAB gunship exploding.

Warfare is the basis of Midchilda's economy, and science has created a new type of military.

Teana: "We're movin' out!"

Where every move. . .

Image of Belka cartridge loading.

And every thought. . .

Shamal, in her lab.

Shamal: You don't trust me?

Of every soldier. . .

Scaglietti, pointing at a group of bureau mages with a mechanical arm bearing a familiar knuckle.

Scaglietti: "Activate it."

Can be controlled

The mages' eyes go yellow, and they start writhing on the ground as IS sigils activate.

Scaglietti: "I never thought it would be so easy! The system is mine!"

Except for one.

Subaru leaps from a broken building and hits the ground in a crouch, making a crater.

Subaru: "Sounds like the perfect job for me."

Cut to RF6's warship, running through the clouds. Hayate appears on a holoscreen.

Hayate: "Subaru, I'm counting on you. Terminate Ginga."

More combat scenes of Subaru fighting cyborgs.

Hayate: "She's preparing to unleash her insurrection."

Ginga-Scaglietti: "Die, Subaru!"

Shamal in her lab; Subaru comes up behind her, wiping tears from her eyes.

Shamal: "Your framework is approaching it's limit."

Subaru: "How long do I have?"

When war becomes research. . .

Scenes of G-S commanding cyborgs.

Ginga-Scaglietti: "Midchilda had better sleep soundly while she still can."

Ginga-Scaglietti: <maniacal laughter>

When armies are toys and test subjects. . .

Gil Graham: "The Numbers are trying to control the dimensional flow of magic."

Nanoha: "They've implemented a system that monitors every mage engaged in combat action."

Who is left in control?

Scene of Wendi knocking aside mages. The Cradle hangs in the sky.

Subaru: "This. . . is my final mission."

This Summer

Scene in which Subaru tries to fights G-S and is knocked aside.

Ginga-Scaglietti: "Sister! It's been too long."

Scene of Due licking her claws, cackling. Scenes of Signum and Cinque in combat.

Evil is powerful.

G-S, holding Subaru, activates Vibration Shatter

Ginga-Scaglietti: "DIE!"

Subaru: "Aaaugh!"

But courage has Caliber.

Nanoha: "Here we go!"

More explosions, bad things rushing at the camera, and Signum cutting open a drone.

Magic Gear Subaru 4:
Devices of the Bureau

----

And that's why it's a good thing StrikerS went so well for our heroes, and that Scaglietti isn't all that subtle in his methods of world domination. Ouch.

Akiyoshi · 2012-02-09, 03:19

Source here xD!

Agito: Unison IN!

Cypha: Oh, look at you public servant, you're really going to fight me.

Signum: Make your jokes while you can Cypha, because i can now see the peak of your power ...while i'm only beginning to tap into mine.

Cypha: Oh my god ..i can't believe this is happening...

Signum: That's right, you're not dealing with the average Belkan Knight anymore. Because i Signum have finally awakened the true spirit of the flame!

Agito: Yeah!

Cypha: ...okay seriously, i'll promise you something, by the end of this, you're going to be bleeding ....like a little pig.

Signum: B*tch you're just jealous of my Belkan Knight swagger...

Cypha: Oh for f**ks sake -_-

bhl88 · 2012-02-23, 17:13

Linith Dojo

Shirou died! Limited Blade Works.

Spoiler for Limited Blade Works:

Koveras Alvane · 2012-03-11, 04:29

Time for another oldie reference...

Signum: I am telling you, Fate, Cypha is totally off her game. Think she's moonlighting? Maybe she's stepping out on Curren?

Fate: ...the deeper mystery here is "Why do you even care?" Isn't this the woman who beat the snot out of you a few months back?

Signum: She got a lucky shot in! *beat* Okay, five or six lucky shots.

Akiyoshi · 2012-04-03, 14:17

More gaming old references....

TSAB Agent: Captain Signum we've located a suspect, it's a tall woman with pale-blonde hair and Dark skine. She wears an eye-patch and a black sword. Probably affiliated to the Huckebein family.

Signum: Good job, Agito come, we must take immediate action!

Agito: all right!

TSAB Agent: Wait!, Captain we need a strategy, maybe our forces can surround the forest, that way we could prepare an ambush and safely retire possible victims from the area, we have the maps and.... Captain? Where she'd go?

*flying to the forest*

Signum: LEEEEEROOOOOOY JEEEEEENKIIIIIIINS!!!

*rushes at Cypha*

xD

Sunder the Gold · 2012-06-09, 23:29

http://politicalhumor.about.com/libr...wspolitics.htm

Nanoha: You have two cows. You taught them how to better defend themselves against wolves.

Fate: You adopted two calves. Everyone agrees that they are adorable and will go on to make many more calves together.

Yuuno: You had one cow, and then you found 21 elephants. You gave away the elephants, then went looking for them when they got loose. Then you gave away your cow to the girl who helped you. Then YOU got put out to pasture. What happened?

Lindy: You have at least one cow, whose milk you use with your green tea. You had at least one prize bull, which you left to your son when you took a desk job. If you have any other cattle, you keep quiet about it.

Chrono: You have two cows, and you earned them the hard way! (You also get a bull through a little bit of nepotism, but you're nontheless qualified.) Eventually, you earn an entire herd of cattle, but now you're stuck in an office and hardly get to visit the ranch.

Scaglietti: You have twelve cows, but you're still not satisfied. Also, your ranchhead is a literal slavedriver, and you want to take over.

Genya: You raised two calves on your own after your wife died. Then you took on five more cows.

Subaru: You have one cow, inherited from your mother. Your sister has the other. Once, you took care of both cows together for a little bit, but later said that you couldn't handle them as well as your mother. Fans agree that this comment makes little sense.

Erio: You have two cows. You ride one into battle.

Caro: You have two cows. They are the happiest cows in the world.

Lutecia: You don't do cattle; you farm bees for honey.

Teana: You have two cows. You thought they were pretty pathetic compared to others' cows, but then you successfully outcompeted three different milking rivals at once, and got hired by a prestigous ranch.

Vivio: You have two cows. One is red and the other is green.

Ixpellia: You had two cows. Two undead, bloodthirsty cows. You're glad that you don't have them anymore.

Rio: You have two cows: Fire and Lighting! People complain that you shouldn't have both.

Corona: You have two stone cows. You made them yourself.

Miura: You have three cows; they were gifts from Zafira, Signum and Vita, who taught you how to care for them. You're pretty good at it.

Sieglinde: You have two cows. Everyone's expecting their eyes to burst into blue flame.

Nanoha: You have two cows. One half of your fanbase endlessly declares that you adore one and should get rid of the other. The other half wishes they'd relax.

Fate: You have one dog. She was eventually loli'fied and put in a library. This was a waste.

Yuuno: You have two cows, at least if the YuNanoFei fans have anything to say about it.

Lycodrake · 2012-06-10, 09:03

I laughed heartily at most of these.
Nice job, Sunder. ^^

Sunder the Gold · 2012-06-10, 10:09

Thanks! Glad someone appreciated it. The meme was wildly popular over at White Wolf's Exalted forum, but the thread ran out of steam a while ago. I'd hoped to relive some of the laughs in another forum.

To that end, if anyone has their own takes on it, please share!

Ah, I forgot the Wolkenritter!

Signum: You have no use for cows or milking. You own two bulls and deal in rodeos.

Signum 2: You pasture your cows in wolf territory, and instead of using fences, you lay in wait.

Shamal: You had two cows. Now you have one batch of badly burnt hamburgers and a lot of curdled milk. You'll get it right one of these days!

Vita: You have two cows. No matter how much milk you drink, you're still a loli.

Zafira: You are torn between your desire to guard the cows as part of your purpose, and hunting the cows to assert that you are a WOLF, not a dog!

Arf: After a moment of poor impulse control, you have only one cow. You're wiser now, but at least it was a tasty lapse in judgment!

Koveras Alvane · 2012-06-10, 13:04

Sunder, you forgot Einhart. Also...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sunder the Gold

Teana: You have two cows. You thought they were pretty pathetic compared to others' cows, but then you successfully outcompeted three different milking rivals at once, and got hired by a prestigous ranch.

Teana: You have two cows. You can milk them both at the same time thanks to long years of hard training you put into it. And then you get assigned to a desk job.

Sunder the Gold · 2012-06-10, 16:19

Quote:

Originally Posted by Koveras Alvane

Sunder, you forgot Einhart.

There's a difference between forgetting and skipping.

I forgot the Wolkenritter; I skipped Einhart. In her case, nothing relevant or clever immediately came to mind, so I moved on.

But if you insist...

Einhart: You have one cow, inherited from your distant ancestor. He used to have two, and the loss of the one has haunted his successors ever since.

Einhart 2: You have two cows, one blue and one purple. Some privately wonder why they aren't a contrasting pair of colors (blue/orange or purple/yellow) like Vivio's red/green.

Einhart 3: You have two cows and absolutely no life outside of milking them.

Vivio: You have two cows. Some nuns think you're better off being a librarian than a milkmaid, but you think it's fun and rewarding anyway.

Ixpellia: You dream of two cows.

Runessa: You had two cows. Then you used them as suicide bombs. You are now in jail.

Thoma: You have two cows. One turns out to be some kind of Unison Device. The other might be a cyborg.

Quote:

Teana: You have two cows. You can milk them both at the same time thanks to long years of hard training you put into it. And then you get assigned to a desk job.

It's funny how Fate used to be more athletic than Nanoha; one of the best in their school.

Then Fate got a job that involved a lot of time sitting down and Nanoha got a job that involved a lot of time on the training field. Now Nanoha is the athletic one of the two.

Sunder the Gold · 2012-06-16, 16:34

I remembered that I forgot the Wolkenritter, but not that I had forgotten Hayate!

HAYATE: You had no cows. Then you got four, and you declared them your children.

Ithekro · 2012-06-16, 21:10

Hayate! Stop molesting the cows!

bhl88 · 2012-06-17, 02:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sunder the Gold

Thoma: You have two cows. One turns out to be some kind of Unison Device. The other might be a cyborg.

Thoma: And the other cow is like you (Quinn).

Auxilism · 2012-06-17, 03:35

Teana: You have two cows. When you divert your attention from them for just five minutes Subaru attacks them. You retaliate by stepping on one of her cows.

Subaru: You have two cows which do weird things. Fans think their thinking process is curvier than rainbows.

Fate: You have a cow. Then Lindy adopted you and gave you a new one. You decided to keep the new one behind the old one.

Hayate: You had a cow. After you lost her you decided to get a much smaller one.

2012-01-09, 10:00	Link #1242
Skane Anime Snark Join Date: May 2006 Location: Singapore Age: 41	Before the TSAB was formed... A bright kingdom named Al-Hazard existed for the Relics. An industrious realm for the Belkans. And a non-administrated world called Earth. But Signum, leader of the Wolkenritters, destroyed the Earth using Lost Logia... or so it was claimed. Shadowy TSAB Council: "You have betrayed our trust in you, Captain." To spare her sister from oblivion, a second Ace strode forth. And her name... ... was FATE. epic guitar strumming Jail: "I see you, Fate Testarossa. You offer so little." Fate: "I have an offer in mind." more epic guitar strumming Will she seal Earth's fate? Or a new destiny? __________________ Hearthstone Battletag: Skane#1425 [Can't GIF This], [Jail's House of Rock], [Kanon In The Snow], [She Ain't Dead Yet... She's In Quantum], [She Stabs] Founder of "The Cult of Psycho-Moe", Member of "ARIA the Social Group" & the "Belkan Saint Church".

2012-01-09, 12:43	Link #1243
Koveras Alvane Mastermind Rational Author Join Date: May 2010 Location: Karlsruhe, Germany Age: 37	I see what you did with the scythe. __________________ Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha AtonerS: Part I - "Ruins", Part II - "Choices", Part III - "Consequences", Epilogue - "Tomorrow".

2012-01-10, 23:17	Link #1245
Akiyoshi The Flame Crussader Join Date: Aug 2009	Some shadowy burglars are scaping after robbing a TSAB facility.... Agito: Freeze! Signum: Laevatein! Laevatein: Sturmwinde! The stream of flames reached the vehicle but the flames suddenly dissapear after one of the guys reveals having a Divider Agito: That won't work Signum! your flames don't work on them! Signum: Not again! They don't seem to work on ANYTHING these days! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Taking a page of Riza Hawkeye's book xDU __________________ May 29 2010-2019 ...9 years ago, the day after never would be the same ~The ASFB~

2012-01-14, 02:16	Link #1247
Arcc Knight who says D'ni Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: -0,-0,-0,-0: The Brink of Time Age: 36	Another delightful trailer parody for your consumption. Original here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oh-roZLH61c Disclaimer- as I wrote this and figured out how it would work, this thing got really grimdark. Please don't hate me too much. Scene opens on a man being patted down at a Bureau security checkpoint. In the not too distant future. . . Flash images of mages and cyborgs battling, and a TSAB gunship exploding. Warfare is the basis of Midchilda's economy, and science has created a new type of military. Teana: "We're movin' out!" Where every move. . . Image of Belka cartridge loading. And every thought. . . Shamal, in her lab. Shamal: You don't trust me? Of every soldier. . . Scaglietti, pointing at a group of bureau mages with a mechanical arm bearing a familiar knuckle. Scaglietti: "Activate it." Can be controlled The mages' eyes go yellow, and they start writhing on the ground as IS sigils activate. Scaglietti: "I never thought it would be so easy! The system is mine!" Except for one. Subaru leaps from a broken building and hits the ground in a crouch, making a crater. Subaru: "Sounds like the perfect job for me." Cut to RF6's warship, running through the clouds. Hayate appears on a holoscreen. Hayate: "Subaru, I'm counting on you. Terminate Ginga." More combat scenes of Subaru fighting cyborgs. Hayate: "She's preparing to unleash her insurrection." Ginga-Scaglietti: "Die, Subaru!" Shamal in her lab; Subaru comes up behind her, wiping tears from her eyes. Shamal: "Your framework is approaching it's limit." Subaru: "How long do I have?" When war becomes research. . . Scenes of G-S commanding cyborgs. Ginga-Scaglietti: "Midchilda had better sleep soundly while she still can." Ginga-Scaglietti: <maniacal laughter> When armies are toys and test subjects. . . Gil Graham: "The Numbers are trying to control the dimensional flow of magic." Nanoha: "They've implemented a system that monitors every mage engaged in combat action." Who is left in control? Scene of Wendi knocking aside mages. The Cradle hangs in the sky. Subaru: "This. . . is my final mission." This Summer Scene in which Subaru tries to fights G-S and is knocked aside. Ginga-Scaglietti: "Sister! It's been too long." Scene of Due licking her claws, cackling. Scenes of Signum and Cinque in combat. Evil is powerful. G-S, holding Subaru, activates Vibration Shatter Ginga-Scaglietti: "DIE!" Subaru: "Aaaugh!" But courage has Caliber. Nanoha: "Here we go!" More explosions, bad things rushing at the camera, and Signum cutting open a drone. Magic Gear Subaru 4: Devices of the Bureau ---- And that's why it's a good thing StrikerS went so well for our heroes, and that Scaglietti isn't all that subtle in his methods of world domination. Ouch. __________________ The more that you resist the tide The more it pulls you in The more you hang on for your life~ Last edited by Arcc; 2012-01-14 at 02:53.

2012-02-09, 03:19	Link #1248
Akiyoshi The Flame Crussader Join Date: Aug 2009	Source here xD! Agito: Unison IN! Cypha: Oh, look at you public servant, you're really going to fight me. Signum: Make your jokes while you can Cypha, because i can now see the peak of your power ...while i'm only beginning to tap into mine. Cypha: Oh my god ..i can't believe this is happening... Signum: That's right, you're not dealing with the average Belkan Knight anymore. Because i Signum have finally awakened the true spirit of the flame! Agito: Yeah! Cypha: ...okay seriously, i'll promise you something, by the end of this, you're going to be bleeding ....like a little pig. Signum: Btch you're just jealous of my Belkan Knight swagger... Cypha: Oh for fks sake -_- __________________ May 29 2010-2019 ...9 years ago, the day after never would be the same ~The ASFB~*

2012-02-23, 17:13	Link #1249
bhl88 Otaku Apprentice Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: The Unseen Horizon	Linith Dojo Shirou died! Limited Blade Works. Spoiler for Limited Blade Works: This is where Shirou never has his little Eternal Moment with Fate and merely attacked her relentlessly. This gave him a rather bad impression to the girl. Fast forward to when Shirou is jewelnapped by Fate. The boy hung in the air as magical bonds chained his arms and legs. His breathe was ragged and his throat was raw from the latest bout of screaming. He was sure that he was bleeding from multiple areas but he couldn’t tell anymore. The constant electrical shocks had all but killed his ability to think. His glazed over eyes turned up at the sound of the door opening. “Arf, strengthen the bonds, I’m going to try to extract the Jewel Seed again.” The voice was back. “Are you sure, you haven’t rested very long.” “Don’t worry. I have recovered enough for another attempt.” Shirou waited patiently for the thrum of Ozone to fill the air. The magical energy of the girl filled his mind and he braced himself once more. “Sealing.” At the emotionless tone, Shirou gritted his teeth in preparation. Lightning danced though his body and Shirou screamed and convulsed in response. His mind grew blank as the pain surpassed his threshold for pain. The girl ignored the boy’s screaming and poured more energy into the sealing spell. She couldn’t fail, not this time. She would retrieve the Jewel Seed for her mother. Deep within the boy, the Jewel Seed felt the girl try to extract it once more. It had poured a mere fraction of its power into the boy to protect itself, but it grew weary of the girl’s attempts. They were getting stronger and stronger as time went by. So the Jewel Seed did the natural thing and defended itself. Fate poured more and more energy into the spell. She could feel the Jewel Seed start to give and felt that this was the time that she would extract the Jewel Seed. But then, something went wrong. Magical Energy flared out of the boy and overpowered her spell. The sheer force of the magical energy had thrown her backwards with Arf catching her. The Jewel Seed was activating. She looked up and feared the worst, but there was no reality warping effect. The world had not caught on fire. No, this reaction had been much more localized. Bardiche fell from her hands as she stared at the boy in horror. There was a metallic noise and the gruesome noise of blades piercing flesh. A gasp for breath accompanied by a screech of metal grinding against metal. The boy made of swords gasped one last time before he died. Swords stabbed into every organ pierced through his skin to show a mockery of scales. Dead End (corrected Bad End) Linith’s Tutoring Session “Oh boy, this is such a shame.” Shirou blinks as he finds himself not chained up in an apartment but in a small meadow. He is lying on a blanket and there is even a small picnic basket laid out. However the thing that catches his attention were the two other people there. The first is a small girl that frightening enough looked like her dressed in a light blue dress. The other is a brunette young woman in a white and brown outfit. “Uh… did I die?” He was pretty sure that the blonde girl was supposed to be shocking him to death, not giggling like she had just seen the funniest thing ever. “Yes, unfortunately you did.” The brown haired woman said softly as she shook her head. “I have to say I’m a little ashamed at Fate’s actions, but it was bound to happen with that woman raising her.” “Uh… what?” “It’s okay Shirou-kun. We’re here to make sure you don’t die again.” The giggling blonde that looked a lot like her was now talking to him. Normally the trauma of meeting a look alike to your former torturer and murderer would freeze you up. For Shirou it just meant he had to blink a few times while looking at her to clear up the misconception. “Do I know you?” “Oh, forgive us for our bad manners. I am Linith-sensei.” The newly dubbed Linith introduced herself before gesturing to the blonde. “And this is my student Alicia. We’re here to tell you why you died and to provide mild amusement for the readers.” “Readers?” Shirou parroted in confusion. Alicia mussed up his hair. “It’s okay Shirou-kun. I don’t understand what she means when she says that either.” “Now, I believe we’ve wasted enough time with the obligatory introduction.” Linith raised a hand and Shirou watched as a blackboard teleported onto the blanket next to her. Alicia had sat next to Shirou and smiled at his confused glance. “The problem you faced was way back in chapter 3. You chose to attack Fate relentlessly instead of having a moment where you stared at her eyes.” Shirou noiselessly mouthed “chapter 3?” But was ignored by both Alicia and Linith. “This is the only chance you have to gain an affection score with Fate early on and is vital to your survival. So start over in Chapter 3 and have your moment with Fate.” “You can do it Shirou-kun. Show Fate that boys aren’t aggressive meanies!” Alicia cheered him on. “Eh? Wai-“ “I’m sorry Shirou, but there simply is no more time for questions. The author has run out of jokes to use, so we’re going to have to cut you off.” Linith apologized gently. “Wha-“ END __________________ OS-tan Collections (temporary): https://discord.gg/Hv2rBs3 Last edited by bhl88; 2012-02-23 at 17:37.

2012-03-11, 04:29	Link #1250
Koveras Alvane Mastermind Rational Author Join Date: May 2010 Location: Karlsruhe, Germany Age: 37	Time for another oldie reference... Signum: I am telling you, Fate, Cypha is totally off her game. Think she's moonlighting? Maybe she's stepping out on Curren? Fate: ...the deeper mystery here is "Why do you even care?" Isn't this the woman who beat the snot out of you a few months back? Signum: She got a lucky shot in! beat Okay, five or six lucky shots. __________________ Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha AtonerS: Part I - "Ruins", Part II - "Choices", Part III - "Consequences", Epilogue - "Tomorrow".

2012-04-03, 14:17	Link #1251
Akiyoshi The Flame Crussader Join Date: Aug 2009	More gaming old references.... TSAB Agent: Captain Signum we've located a suspect, it's a tall woman with pale-blonde hair and Dark skine. She wears an eye-patch and a black sword. Probably affiliated to the Huckebein family. Signum: Good job, Agito come, we must take immediate action! Agito: all right! TSAB Agent: Wait!, Captain we need a strategy, maybe our forces can surround the forest, that way we could prepare an ambush and safely retire possible victims from the area, we have the maps and.... Captain? Where she'd go? flying to the forest Signum: LEEEEEROOOOOOY JEEEEEENKIIIIIIINS!!! rushes at Cypha xD __________________ May 29 2010-2019 ...9 years ago, the day after never would be the same ~The ASFB~

2012-06-09, 23:29	Link #1252
Sunder the Gold Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2011	http://politicalhumor.about.com/libr...wspolitics.htm Nanoha: You have two cows. You taught them how to better defend themselves against wolves. Fate: You adopted two calves. Everyone agrees that they are adorable and will go on to make many more calves together. Yuuno: You had one cow, and then you found 21 elephants. You gave away the elephants, then went looking for them when they got loose. Then you gave away your cow to the girl who helped you. Then YOU got put out to pasture. What happened? Lindy: You have at least one cow, whose milk you use with your green tea. You had at least one prize bull, which you left to your son when you took a desk job. If you have any other cattle, you keep quiet about it. Chrono: You have two cows, and you earned them the hard way! (You also get a bull through a little bit of nepotism, but you're nontheless qualified.) Eventually, you earn an entire herd of cattle, but now you're stuck in an office and hardly get to visit the ranch. Scaglietti: You have twelve cows, but you're still not satisfied. Also, your ranchhead is a literal slavedriver, and you want to take over. Genya: You raised two calves on your own after your wife died. Then you took on five more cows. Subaru: You have one cow, inherited from your mother. Your sister has the other. Once, you took care of both cows together for a little bit, but later said that you couldn't handle them as well as your mother. Fans agree that this comment makes little sense. Erio: You have two cows. You ride one into battle. Caro: You have two cows. They are the happiest cows in the world. Lutecia: You don't do cattle; you farm bees for honey. Teana: You have two cows. You thought they were pretty pathetic compared to others' cows, but then you successfully outcompeted three different milking rivals at once, and got hired by a prestigous ranch. Vivio: You have two cows. One is red and the other is green. Ixpellia: You had two cows. Two undead, bloodthirsty cows. You're glad that you don't have them anymore. Rio: You have two cows: Fire and Lighting! People complain that you shouldn't have both. Corona: You have two stone cows. You made them yourself. Miura: You have three cows; they were gifts from Zafira, Signum and Vita, who taught you how to care for them. You're pretty good at it. Sieglinde: You have two cows. Everyone's expecting their eyes to burst into blue flame. Nanoha: You have two cows. One half of your fanbase endlessly declares that you adore one and should get rid of the other. The other half wishes they'd relax. Fate: You have one dog. She was eventually loli'fied and put in a library. This was a waste. Yuuno: You have two cows, at least if the YuNanoFei fans have anything to say about it.

2012-06-10, 09:03	Link #1253
Lycodrake Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2011 Age: 32	I laughed heartily at most of these. Nice job, Sunder. ^^

2012-06-10, 10:09	Link #1254
Sunder the Gold Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2011	Thanks! Glad someone appreciated it. The meme was wildly popular over at White Wolf's Exalted forum, but the thread ran out of steam a while ago. I'd hoped to relive some of the laughs in another forum. To that end, if anyone has their own takes on it, please share! Ah, I forgot the Wolkenritter! Signum: You have no use for cows or milking. You own two bulls and deal in rodeos. Signum 2: You pasture your cows in wolf territory, and instead of using fences, you lay in wait. Shamal: You had two cows. Now you have one batch of badly burnt hamburgers and a lot of curdled milk. You'll get it right one of these days! Vita: You have two cows. No matter how much milk you drink, you're still a loli. Zafira: You are torn between your desire to guard the cows as part of your purpose, and hunting the cows to assert that you are a WOLF, not a dog! Arf: After a moment of poor impulse control, you have only one cow. You're wiser now, but at least it was a tasty lapse in judgment! Last edited by Sunder the Gold; 2012-06-10 at 10:23.

2012-06-16, 16:34	Link #1257
Sunder the Gold Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2011	I remembered that I forgot the Wolkenritter, but not that I had forgotten Hayate! HAYATE: You had no cows. Then you got four, and you declared them your children.

2012-06-16, 21:10	Link #1258
Ithekro Gamilas Falls Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Republic of California Age: 46	Hayate! Stop molesting the cows! __________________