2011-05-17, 22:38 | Link #8781 |
Senior Member
Artist
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Normandy SR-2
Age: 29
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Hmmm... I am sort of barging into the conversation here but I really wanted to ask a not-so-quick question...
So, I'm in an all-girls' school and boarding on top of that. I'm also pretty passive and reserved. It ends up that this isn't really a great combination... Because I never attend events or dances or anything like that, I have absolutely no guy friends at all. This is pretty bad, since I haven't really interacted with guys my age for a really long time now. I didn't really care about it before, but now that I've seen the grads going to prom with their dates this year and knowing I'll be in that position next year, I guess I got more self-conscious... So my question is this. Honestly, will my current state affect me socializing after I graduate, do you think? Is it really bad that I've had no experience in dating and relationships at all at this age?
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2011-05-17, 22:43 | Link #8782 |
blinded by blood
Author
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If you're as confident and well-spoken in reality as you are online, then you may have no problems, but it's important to remember that hormones can melt your brain. Even the strongest minds have been felled when their lady-bits are set a-tingling...
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2011-05-17, 22:52 | Link #8783 | |
Senior Member
Artist
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Normandy SR-2
Age: 29
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And gulp. Hormones I'm really afraid what sort of stupid judgements I might make when they kick in...
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2011-05-17, 23:01 | Link #8784 | |
Onii-chan~
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2011-05-17, 23:05 | Link #8785 | |
User Title eaten by ravenous bunnies
IT Support
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Zeon
Age: 33
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Anyway question for the females. How do you guys feel when one of your guy friends tell you how he felt about you but he was drunk do you guys take it seriously ?
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2011-05-17, 23:11 | Link #8786 | |
Senior Member
Artist
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Normandy SR-2
Age: 29
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Quote:
I'll... I'll keep that last bit in mind
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2011-05-17, 23:26 | Link #8787 | |
User Title eaten by ravenous bunnies
IT Support
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Zeon
Age: 33
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2011-05-17, 23:38 | Link #8788 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Age: 38
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You're not behind yet, but if you're as shy as you say you are, it's probably best to get some practice in. It's never going to get easier. In fact, it'll become harder because expectations and pressures will rise the older you get. I'm not saying to go crazy or anything, but I'd definitely suggest socialization practice before it causes harm to your general demeanor.
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2011-05-17, 23:40 | Link #8789 |
I'm not a tumor
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: In the dreams of beautiful women
Age: 31
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@ halad here is one piece of advice that always seems to work when girls talk to guys.
Laugh at everything they say Its abit cheesy but honestly guys go apeshit over girls that think they're funny, unless they're a douche but then no amount of advice will change that. |
2011-05-17, 23:51 | Link #8791 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Philadelphia, Pa
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Once you start going out with friends dancing comes pretty easy by watching or you can practice with friends. Its not that important either. Its not that important I utterly fail at dancing but I excel at a lot of other things. Personally I think a girl who laughs at everything I said would come off as insipid. I'd might enjoy her "company" for a hour or two but that's about it.
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2011-05-18, 02:43 | Link #8793 | |
Disabled By Request
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P.S. If it's any consolation, I'd totally go to prom night with you (assuming I was.......6 to 8 years younger) |
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2011-05-18, 05:03 | Link #8794 | |||||||
Banned
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Dai Korai Teikoku
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I don't see your "lack of" experience as a bad thing. As long as you aren't too naive (living in a romantic fantasy and such, like so many "innocent" girls in their teens) or have arrhenphobia (fear of men), you'll probably be able to just be yourself and at least start friendships. BTW, I have misandry, at least if the opposite side is trying to make a move on me. Quote:
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Besides, I'm already engaged, so that's really an irrelavent issue for me. Quote:
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Haladflire65, if there's anything you want to talk in private, shoot me a PM, imouto |
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2011-05-18, 05:32 | Link #8795 | |
Knight Errant
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Dublin, Ireland
Age: 35
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As for guys generally, I wouldn't worry too hard about it. As a girl, so long as you look even mildly attractive (and you very likely look more attractive then you think), you'll get guys somewhere hitting on you. As a guy it's a lot more difficult to get into the dating scene generally. However since you don't have much experience with guys, you probably should be a bit careful when they first start chatting you up, don't be too quick to leap into the arms of the first guy you meet. I hear too many stories with bad endings about girls (and guys) who go out with the wrong people starting out. Most of the guys who try and engage you in conversation will be nice guys, but some of them will be jerks. Just be reasonably cautious and you'll have no problems. It really goes with talking to anyone really, but with "romantic relations" it's easier for your judgement to be clouded by hormones. On the other hand, you should probably try and start making some male friends in a casual context, IE no sexuality expected. So long as you make yourself available guys will make the effort to talk to you. I also wouldn't worry too much about a lack of dancing skill, there a lot of guys who don't dance at all. And if they do, and you don't, and you want to learn, they'd probably be queuing up to teach you... Just don't get cocky |
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2011-05-18, 09:15 | Link #8796 | ||
Senior Guest
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Athens (GMT+2)
Age: 35
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2011-05-18, 10:09 | Link #8797 |
Megane girl fan
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
Age: 55
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Lots of great advice in the previous posts.
Don't worry too much about "being behind", you may find yourself rushing into something you'll deeply regret later. Like the Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) lyrics say, "sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind…the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself." So true. "Be yourself" is such an old cliche, but the thing about cliches is that they generally tend to be a condensed truth. By being yourself, you will eventually atttract someone, it really doesn't matter how shy or outgoing you are. It will happen. Sometimes that attraction will take longer to happen to you than it does others (see the lyric quote above), you just need to be patient. Above all, and I know it will be hard, but try not to let your worry and doubt affect your studies. |
Tags |
advice, break-ups, dating, dating after divorce, divorce, happiness, love, pairings, single dad, single mom |
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