2012-10-23, 21:31 | Link #37741 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
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Quote:
The reason why I changed it is because as the story progressed, the more the story itself began to stray away from the summary. Re-gaining the status the male gender once had in the IS universe is not their personal mission. Although it sounds like that at first, but starting Chapter 4, it begins to go differently. Case in point, it's not the IS system Eric has a grudge against. If that attack didn't happened on Thuder Crash's night of disbandment, then my guys would've gone their seperate ways and there would be no Project Silverback. Brian and Clay would've flown to live in the United States, while Eric and Eddie would've stayed in Japan to live their own lives. Basically, they would've adapted to the female dominated society, if that attack didn't occured. If you look at Gears of War, those guys are not fighting the Locust because of manliness. It's something they have to do because the Locust pushed humanity to the brink of extinction. For humanity to live, they have no choice but to fight. They're not fighting the Locust out of manliness, they're fighting to defend the human race. How would you feel if someone close to you is threatened? |
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2012-10-23, 21:36 | Link #37742 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
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@ Senpai - I'll make a more cheerful draft later.
\ @ Jak - The problem is that they tend to act like the generic "Gears of war manly man" during combat. No one can take Alex mercer angsting about morality seriously while he's gobbling on people and running them over with tanks.
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2012-10-23, 21:52 | Link #37743 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
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Another one in the archive...
Infinite Stratos Paxis So how the hell can they not act like that? And oddly, after I changed the summary, I got a bit more readers than before. |
2012-10-24, 00:08 | Link #37744 |
I am no one
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
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@ Eras
I don't know if I really want to add the mood whiplash-y comedic part in the end of Chapter 13 or not, or maybe, I should just introduce Josh right there, or worse, the evil counterpart of the twins (yet to be named) so to give it even higher cliff than before (pun intended) @ Jak Indeed, summary itself is very important. One of the bad ingredients for a fanfic is the phrase "Can't write summaries" and "Summarry sux" etc. posted right under the title. @ New fic I don't see Ichika, whether this is the usual shtick or outright replacement attempt had yet to be seen.
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Last edited by ZeroXSEED; 2012-10-24 at 00:58. |
2012-10-24, 03:24 | Link #37745 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
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@ Jak - I dunno, maybe have them act like killing isn't something cool and awesome? Even soldiers don't enjoy killing nine out of ten times unless they're blood knights or psycho's. And yes, having them go "Fuck yeah!" a lot counts.
@ Senpai - I say go for it. Mood whiplash tends to be common.
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2012-10-24, 03:58 | Link #37746 | |
Titans Test Team Pilot
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: The Elysium
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Quote:
As for the Silverbacks. I'm on the edge about them having Closed Forms... Unlike IS units, the Silverbacks (from how I see it) are made to kill. Unless the engineer who made them is abit of a psycho, they would need to have a good reason to be portable and how does the engineer trusts the users enough to not break out the units in the middle of a crowded mall and start mowing random people down.
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2012-10-24, 08:11 | Link #37748 |
I am no one
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
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Since I'm writing ST again, I'll revise the tech again and change few
Armored Stratos > Male compatible > Power output is the same as I.S., but longer recharge time. > Self-repair and material conversion retained, but slower. > Direct information link is one way (from the pilot), so it's inferior to I.S. in electronics. Information from unit is displayed on the HMD (Head-Mounted Display) and narrated byt the computer voice. Hence the need for helmet, preventing distraction. > As the result, most of the function is less flexible or responsive, but easier to control. > No shift up ability, evolution, or Digital Storage. Duplica Stratos > Identical to I.S. > Faulty core prone to crash and berserk. > Easily overheat when above happens, and harmful to pilot. @ New fic chapter 2 Still no Ichika, yayness? </sarcasm>
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Last edited by ZeroXSEED; 2012-10-24 at 08:26. |
2012-10-24, 10:12 | Link #37749 |
Just another Idiot
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Delusion world
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I don't think Ichika exist, the OC overrides him.
== Kyrios Tech: (To differentiate their technology from IS technology) Spoiler for Kyrio Tech (cut for length):
I think I like generating Ideas more than typing out a story.... Edit: Okay... Opening part(of First Chapter) done... I'm not sure it is good or not..... Anybody want to beta-read it?
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Last edited by agetreme; 2012-10-24 at 13:49. |
2012-10-24, 17:11 | Link #37750 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
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Quote:
How were they? Did they go with the summary? |
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2012-10-24, 22:19 | Link #37751 |
I am no one
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
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Hmm, and Blitz still have no spare time, I really need to discuss this little bugger about the wacky guys hijink...
Speaking of the darkest hour, there will be a scene like this... later. Spoiler for Huge:
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Last edited by ZeroXSEED; 2012-10-24 at 22:40. |
2012-10-25, 02:24 | Link #37757 |
Just another Idiot
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Delusion world
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I don't have a title for the original story yet, so I call it Alternative Project.
In that universe, female gamers are rare breed and the Cyber Game competition is dominated by males. Why? Because parents want their daughter to be IS pilots.... to get into ISA, you need to have good grades so girls are forced to study hard while guys are free to do whatever they want (due to low social value), so they spent most of their time playing games. Better to reign in hell (no life, having 2d Waifu) than to serve in heaven (having life, being nice to girls).
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2012-10-25, 08:29 | Link #37759 |
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2009
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I think I can answer this one.
The Florence Nightingale effect is were a nurse/doctor/caregiver develops romantic feelings towards their patient even if little contact or only basic care is given. But if the patient does not need that much help anymore, the feelings may fade. If you need an example. Think of Rin as a nurse and Ichika, a patient. Rin only provides basic care and contact is minimal. As time goes by, Rin begins to hold feelings for Ichika. Ichika eventually recovers enough and does not need that much care anymore and Rin's feelings fade. I hope that helps. |
2012-10-25, 09:35 | Link #37760 |
Just another Idiot
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Delusion world
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I just remembered that I already had a wimpy male character (Joan)....
What to do.... There can't be two character sharing the same role! DEATHMATCH! Nah, both would be too wimpy for that... I know, I will remake the male lead.... Add confident (he is very certain and proud of being a hermit) but a little crazy (He played too much game) yet brilliant in a different sense than other OC in Non-combat orientated areas. However, Hot-blooded is still an act to a cooler(as in Cool-headed) side. == Watt Shepherd (Because Maverick is more of an American family name) > Shepherd is not because of Commander Shepherd....but you know....a person who guard sheep? > Sounds and appear Confident/Smug (Mostly to throw people off/make them a little paranoid.....It's like he has something up his sleeve but you don't know what is it...or when it will happen) >Go Heroic Blue Screen of Death when he got defeated in games.... (Complete with Training from Hell.... and piss off Chifuyu) > Cool Head most of the time....However, will still make unsound decision based on emotion when emotionally overwhelmed (anybody would do the same). >Hot-blooded and talked like a pervert (but will never actually do such things) > Crazy (Think differently from normal person... could be because he played too much games. Craziness tend be game-related: E.g. Level up, Get Legendary Item!) > Brilliant in playing violin and programming (Took lesson in former and a hobby for latter) - > His unit is repairer type (missing role from IS-verse)
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Tags |
fanfic ideas, fanfiction, ff.net, harem, is fanfic, warning fanfic spoilers, wincest |
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