Dating

[Lost Cause]

Just make sure she dies ditch the idea! Not only could she be chad he'd with perjury, but sued for liable and slander by the ex-boyfriend!

[willx]

Walked around outside in Lululemon pants, saw a girl staring at my butt. Yeaaahh.. still got it

Outlook is positive

[barcode120x]

Originally Posted by willx

Walked around outside in Lululemon pants, saw a girl staring at my butt. Yeaaahh.. still got it

Outlook is positive

Unless there was a stain somewhere there...........................or your crack was showing..................

Haha, I'm just messing :P; thumbs up though!

[Nightbat®]

Originally Posted by Scanner

Unless there was a stain somewhere there...........................or your crack was showing..................

Haha, I'm just messing :P; thumbs up though!

Hmm, I notice it happens to me most often when I put my wallet in my backpocket

[GDB]

Sounds like you found some gold diggers.

[Nightbat®]

Originally Posted by GDB

Sounds like you found some gold diggers.

Are you saying they're not interested in me because I'm such a charming, witty, empathic and intelligent conversationalist?

[Aqua Knight]

What's your opinion on overly attached girlfriends?

[Nightbat®]

Originally Posted by Aqua Knight

What's your opinion on overly attached girlfriends?

The insecure or the possesive type of attachment?

[Aqua Knight]

What do you mean by insecure attachment?

[Nightbat®]

Originally Posted by Aqua Knight

What do you mean by insecure attachment?

Well, there's the type who thinks she owns you
and then there's the type that doesn't want to lose you

[Aqua Knight]

I'd say kinda of possesive

[Ledgem]

You want our opinions, but what for? Are you feeling unsure of your relationship?

Having a possessive partner... it really depends on the level of possessiveness, and it also depends on your expectations. It's not inherently good or bad.

[DonQuigleone]

Originally Posted by Aqua Knight

What's your opinion on overly attached girlfriends?

Some level of possessiveness is to be expected. However, it's important that you maintain independent lives. It's not healthy to spend too much time with one person. For one thing, you have all your other non-romantic relationships and friendships to consider, which are just as important as your romantic relationship. You also have to make time for yourself too(though how much you need depends on your temperament, I need lots of me time, other... not so much).

[Aqua Knight]

Agreed, but I just can't understand when the possessive person doesn't understand when it's time to stop clinging (say per day).

Spending too much time together ruins the relationships from my POV (most of the time). That is when you only spend time together, but not with friends, etc.

PS
What does "moe" do in the tags of the thread

[Ledgem]

Originally Posted by DonQuigleone

It's not healthy to spend too much time with one person.

It's not healthy for one's overall mental health to be isolated and alone, but I haven't seen anything claiming that it's possible to spend an unhealthy amount of time with one person.

Originally Posted by Aqua Knight

Spending too much time together ruins the relationships from my POV (most of the time). That is when you only spend time together, but not with friends, etc.

Everyone has a different expectation of how a relationship will go, and what's most important is that both members have similar expectations. Otherwise you'll get some conflict; in your case, you're feeling held down, but if your girlfriend lets you go off to do things as you wish, she'll probably feel neglected. It may be possible to negotiate and have both members adjust, but this is something that you should probably deal with sooner rather than later. Let your girlfriend know how you feel, but reassure her that you're not judging her, not finding her to be annoying, and that you want to make it work so that you're both happy. (Assuming you really do, anyway.)

[GDB]

Originally Posted by Ledgem

It's not healthy for one's overall mental health to be isolated and alone, but I haven't seen anything claiming that it's possible to spend an unhealthy amount of time with one person.

Bates Motel?

[Ledgem]

Originally Posted by GDB

Bates Motel?

I had to look this one up, as I wasn't familiar with it

[DonQuigleone]

Originally Posted by Ledgem

It's not healthy for one's overall mental health to be isolated and alone, but I haven't seen anything claiming that it's possible to spend an unhealthy amount of time with one person.

I did not mean health in a clinical sense. I more mean for the relationship. Too much time with one person is smothering. Spend so much time with a person and the relationship burns out, and you just get bored.

That said, I would say extreme possessiveness in a relationship is mentally unhealthy itself. Usually it shows the person to have rather low self esteem (we're not spending time with each other, he mustn't love me!) or paranoia (He's cheating on me, that's why he doesn't want to spend all day with me!). Such a person is best avoided, as they'll just try to control your entire life.

Also, when you become to wrapped up with just one person, it means you have no social support if things go bad between you. There's nothing wrong with spending a lot of time with one person, but spending so much time with one person, to the detriment of spending time with anyone else, is bad. Generally I think the research says that it's best to have a number of strong close connections.

Everyone has a different expectation of how a relationship will go, and what's most important is that both members have similar expectations. Otherwise you'll get some conflict; in your case, you're feeling held down, but if your girlfriend lets you go off to do things as you wish, she'll probably feel neglected. It may be possible to negotiate and have both members adjust, but this is something that you should probably deal with sooner rather than later. Let your girlfriend know how you feel, but reassure her that you're not judging her, not finding her to be annoying, and that you want to make it work so that you're both happy. (Assuming you really do, anyway.)

It really all depends on how she's possessive. A little bit of possessiveness is to be expected. But if she wants the guy to abstain from his usual commitments in favour of spending time with her, then things are not good.

[Nightbat®]

Originally Posted by Ledgem

It's not healthy for one's overall mental health to be isolated and alone, but I haven't seen anything claiming that it's possible to spend an unhealthy amount of time with one person.

I also find it a bit odd, that people can work 8 hours a day with the same person for years
But aren't willing to spend more time with someone they actually chose for.

Which isn't much more than with a a colleague when you think about it.
You're busy with work at least 40 hours a week, you sleep another 50.
Leaving 78 hours of wich you're certainly gonna lose hours on commuting to/from work, then there are the moments that either is doing something else somewhere for themselves
(hobbies/Sports/Showers/Toilets)
Then you can argue about how much of the remaining hours are 'quality time'

In this day and age, people actually have to PLAN spending time together
they have to synchronize agendas to prevent forgetting kissing eachother goodnight

Lets make a difference between spending time or demanding every waking moment form the other
Because only in the latter can we talk about posessivenes

Now, can we say "Posessive" if a person calls you every day because they only see you a few times a week?

[Who]

Originally Posted by Aqua Knight

What's your opinion on overly attached girlfriends?

Something like this:

Spoiler for space saving: