Dating

[Ascaloth]

Originally Posted by yoropa

Girlfriends cost money and I'm poor. XD

For such a simple, mercenary reason? 10 bucks that should you decide to follow your gut feelings, this wouldn't be much of a counter-reason.

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

The older is somewhere in UK right now. If I told her, she would start screaming her head off and threaten to burn my house down then bury my six feet under. Her temper is shorter than a pinky and hotter than a plasma-based flamethrower.

Besides, I don't want both of them to fight. It would put me in a bad position as a two-timer (which apparently I am not). Then also, the younger one is so helplessly cute to the extent of almost irresistible : thank goodness for army training, or else I would have done her now.

There's tsundere, and then there's just plain unreasonable. If the older resorts to what you said, then she would be the latter.

This is one of the things you have to stand firm on, particularly since not only does it affect you greatly, it's true that you didn't even ask for this. It's not like you ever tried to hit on the younger, so by right the older cannot reasonably pin the blame on you for the younger crushing on you. It's up to you to tell the older girl that, so don't be a chickenshit (like the last time) and get it over with.

Besides, I find it likely you're just assuming what her behaviour would be. Is it impossible that her reaction would be a lot more reasonable than you think?

[yoropa]

Originally Posted by Ascaloth

For such a simple, mercenary reason? 10 bucks that should you decide to follow your gut feelings, this wouldn't be much of a counter-reason.

Problem 2: She's an exchange student. ><

I have got to stop falling for international ladies...

[Ascaloth]

Originally Posted by yoropa

Problem 2: She's an exchange student. ><

I have got to stop falling for international ladies...

That's slightly more of a problem, but considering my girl isn't a local either, I'd dare say this gets lumped into the same category as the first reason.

[cheyannew]

Originally Posted by yoropa

Girlfriends cost money and I'm poor. XD

man you're dating the wrong people then ROFL


a date for me and my gf could be dinner and a movie, or we're just as happy gathering up the kids, and taking them all to a playground and snuggle while they run around like fools

[Nervous Venus]

What happens when you're dating a guy who's actually okay with you paying for everything on dates? Is this a bad sign?

(Female here.)

[yoropa]

Originally Posted by cheyannew

man you're dating the wrong people then ROFL


a date for me and my gf could be dinner and a movie, or we're just as happy gathering up the kids, and taking them all to a playground and snuggle while they run around like fools

For the record I haven't actually dated anybody, leaving me as one of two people (to my knowledge) in the grade who has not done anything like that. I'm pretty pathetic. XD

Originally Posted by Nervous Venus

What happens when you're dating a guy who's actually okay with you paying for everything on dates? Is this a bad sign?

(Female here.)

It might mean he's poor and is really grateful, in my case.

[Tsuyoshi]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

It doesn't work that way. He has to bash his head against the wall 15 times or go diving with white sharks.

Anyway, on my side, things just got a little worse. During a train ride last Saturday, she wasn't tall enough to reach the handlebars, so I jokingly said that she could use me as one. She did and grabbed my arm so we end up looking like a couple in the sardine can while my friends pretended not to see anything.

Secondly, she popped questions like :

"Do you have a girlfriend? Why not?"

"Why don't you look for one?"

"What kind of girls are you looking for?"

Which I answered :

"Nope. I am already married." - She took my words for real for a moment lol. Wish it lasted.

"Like I said, I am already married. I stay faithful to my wives." - She replied, "I mean, RL girls."

"Catgirls." - She gave me a facepalm expression and laughed.

I proceed to ask a stupid question, "So you looking for a boyfriend?" She replied, "I wish I have one.", so I hurriedly changed the subject by telling her that she should concentrate on her studies because it is her 'A's year then start nagging.

Seems like I only have a few more months left to live (as soon as the older one gets back). Wish me luck.

Lol, it looks like you made it pretty clear to her that you're not interested. But if she's so cute that the only thing keeping you from taking her is army training, why not just accept her and actually go out with her? I don't mean to offend you when I say this, but to me, it looks like you're giving ridiculous answers to make her think you're just way out there in terms of your interests to try and discourage her from going out with you. In other words, you're trying to make yourself look like an idiot to her so you don't have her bothering you again. But really, I don't see what the problem is with her. She said she wants to improve, doesn't she? I think going out with someone that she likes could do just that, and considering you think she actually is cute, there's no reason not to spend time with her iibh, including fear of the older sister who, imho, won't try to kill you for rejecting her. It's her fault for cutting herself (or however else she'll deal with a rejection on your part), not yours.

[Kaige]

Originally Posted by Nervous Venus

What happens when you're dating a guy who's actually okay with you paying for everything on dates? Is this a bad sign?

(Female here.)

It depends. Do you feel as if he's taking advantage or its just the way it ends up?

The key is where the initiative is coming from - if you're taking the reins and making the move, he might be just letting you wear the pants. If he's dropping suggestions and inviting you out only to leave the bill, then something might be up.

[yoropa]

Okay so I'm losing sleep over this, which is the first problem. The second problem is that I have no driver's license or permit which would interfere with the whole "going out" thing. Third, based on some new regulations added, it has now become 500x harder for me to get even a basic permit and I won't go into the details on that but chances are I won't be able to obtain one until I'm 25 or so at this rate.

This means that my only real methods of transportation for anything, not just this, would be foot and mooching rides off of others. This makes me one of two people in the grade who cannot drive, unrelated to being one of two people who have not been in a relationship (to my knowledge on both of those).

I mean, I dunno maybe "Wanna take a ride on my shoes?" is attractive to some girls... Even if I had a legal means of driving I still wouldn't have a car. Couple this with me not playing any sports, being absurdly underweight (I'm not anorexic, but I sure look it...), and being damn ugly (not gonna even try to kid myself on this one), and I'm not exactly what you'd call "boyfriend material," even by the slightest stretch of imagination.

So it's a big problem I can't stop thinking about this girl. =_=

[Kafriel]

Originally Posted by Nervous Venus

What happens when you're dating a guy who's actually okay with you paying for everything on dates? Is this a bad sign?

(Female here.)

Maybe he thinks it's stupid to fight over something like that - depends on whether you insist on paying, in which case he's just avoiding unnecessary trouble. If you end up paying due to a silent mutual agreement, maybe you could ask him to split the bill sometime.

Originally Posted by yoropa

Okay so I'm losing sleep over this, which is the first problem. The second problem is that I have no driver's license or permit which would interfere with the whole "going out" thing. Third, based on some new regulations added, it has now become 500x harder for me to get even a basic permit and I won't go into the details on that but chances are I won't be able to obtain one until I'm 25 or so at this rate.

This means that my only real methods of transportation for anything, not just this, would be foot and mooching rides off of others. This makes me one of two people in the grade who cannot drive, unrelated to being one of two people who have not been in a relationship (to my knowledge on both of those).

I mean, I dunno maybe "Wanna take a ride on my shoes?" is attractive to some girls... Even if I had a legal means of driving I still wouldn't have a car. Couple this with me not playing any sports, being absurdly underweight (I'm not anorexic, but I sure look it...), and being damn ugly (not gonna even try to kid myself on this one), and I'm not exactly what you'd call "boyfriend material," even by the slightest stretch of imagination.

So it's a big problem I can't stop thinking about this girl. =_=

I got my license this Christmas, haven't used it even once. Not having your own means of transport doesn't mean anything, taking a walk is more romantic than driving, you can always just arrange a rendezvous point and walk from there if you're going downtown.
Moving on to the looks...people may like how I look, but they fall in love with me for who I am. (goes w/o saying that the same applies to everyone)
To me, money is your only problem. Girlfriends need maintenance and NV's post even if they pay for you, it wouldn't feel right. You can still talk to her though, right?

[yoropa]

Originally Posted by Kafriel

I got my license this Christmas, haven't used it even once. Not having your own means of transport doesn't mean anything, taking a walk is more romantic than driving, you can always just arrange a rendezvous point and walk from there if you're going downtown.
Moving on to the looks...people may like how I look, but they fall in love with me for who I am. (goes w/o saying that the same applies to everyone)
To me, money is your only problem. Girlfriends need maintenance and NV's post even if they pay for you, it wouldn't feel right. You can still talk to her though, right?

While I agree, it's pretty difficult for me to get a ride anywhere. I rarely go downtown anyway, there's literally nothing to do there except buy overpriced sushi. Sooo socially inept, hah. And I know it's not the looks that fully matter but let's face it, they still matter, and I usually come off as incredibly creepy or something. I mean yeah I can talk to her still but now it just feels weird and abnormal.

tl;dr; I'm a pussy.

[RadiantBeam]

Originally Posted by yoropa

tl;dr; I'm a pussy.

Have you ever considered possibly discussing this with her? I can understand why you wouldn't, considering, but it sounds like it's causing you some serious problems if you're losing sleep over it.

[Wrath88]

Well, how about confirming how much the things that would entertain her will put a strain on your wallet and time? Maybe that knowledge might help you decide whether to move forward or give you the motivation to hold yourself back.

[yoropa]

Originally Posted by RadiantBeam

Have you ever considered possibly discussing this with her? I can understand why you wouldn't, considering, but it sounds like it's causing you some serious problems if you're losing sleep over it.

No, I have not considering discussing whether or not I am a pussy with her, and I somehow don't think I will. XD

We're on spring break now so I won't be seeing her until like a week. No phone number or anything like that.

Originally Posted by Wrath88

Well, how about confirming how much the things that would entertain her will put a strain on your wallet and time? Maybe that knowledge might help you decide whether to move forward or give you the motivation to hold yourself back.

My wallet budget is under $20, so I'm pretty sure almost anything would strain it. But that's a good idea I hadn't really thought about.

[Kafriel]

And I know it's not the looks that fully matter but let's face it, they still matter, and I usually come off as incredibly creepy or something. I mean yeah I can talk to her still but now it just feels weird and abnormal.

Why does it feel weird and abnormal? Anyway, remember that others don't see you the same way you see yourself, perhaps to her, you're not as hideous as you think:P

it sounds like it's causing you some serious problems if you're losing sleep over it.

If you do talk about it, don't start off serious or you might scare her away in a very stalk-ey manner. Would still be better than holding it all in you though.

While I agree, it's pretty difficult for me to get a ride anywhere.

Are there no buses/trains in Korea? (I feel I've had this discussion before, but I'm not sure so I'm asking [probably] again, excuse my memory ~_~)

[yoropa]

Originally Posted by Kafriel

Why does it feel weird and abnormal? Anyway, remember that others don't see you the same way you see yourself, perhaps to her, you're not as hideous as you think:P

I dunno, I just instantly feel guilty whenever I think about stuff like this. And quite frankly I think others view me as worse than I view myself. First day of high school, new crowd of people, and somehow everybody already knows my name and I'm already being called some pretty nasty things that I won't repeat here.

She hasn't shown any sign against me, though, which is why I'm guhhh-ing and stuff.

Originally Posted by Kafriel

Are there no buses/trains in Korea? (I feel I've had this discussion before, but I'm not sure so I'm asking [probably] again, excuse my memory ~_~)

(I'm American, she's an exchange student)

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by Ascaloth

There's tsundere, and then there's just plain unreasonable. If the older resorts to what you said, then she would be the latter.

This is one of the things you have to stand firm on, particularly since not only does it affect you greatly, it's true that you didn't even ask for this. It's not like you ever tried to hit on the younger, so by right the older cannot reasonably pin the blame on you for the younger crushing on you. It's up to you to tell the older girl that, so don't be a chickenshit (like the last time) and get it over with.

Besides, I find it likely you're just assuming what her behaviour would be. Is it impossible that her reaction would be a lot more reasonable than you think?

Considering the fact that whatever I say always seem to piss her off in one way or another (I'd like to know why), it is highly likely she is going to smash my face in. Though I can be mean and make her waste an air ticket by lying to her that I slept with her sister, then again I might not live to see next week. She is one fun girl to tease.

Since I am not a girl with an imouto myself, I can't understand why she is so protective of that younger girl. C'mon, she is turning 18 this year, give her a break. And give me a break too, it is not like I am going to one-night stand her little sis upon her birthday.

Assuming her behaviour is reasonable, it would still result in me getting threatened or injured one way or another. To quote her, I am "fun to punch".

P.S : That little girl asked me to go to her house on Friday night to help her study. I am sure she knows of my shitty grades back in junior college, so this is rather suspicious. Should I go?

Originally Posted by yoropa

My wallet budget is under $20, so I'm pretty sure almost anything would strain it. But that's a good idea I hadn't really thought about.

Go for something that drags time. Like an ice cream parlor to sit down and talk. $20 can last you for a day if you know what to do with it : I used to spend $3 for 5 hours in a game arcade.

[yoropa]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

P.S : That little girl asked me to go to her house on Friday night to help her study. I am sure she knows of my shitty grades back in junior college, so this is rather suspicious. Should I go?

If she's as crazy for you as you say she probably might want some studying for human anatomical biology, if you catch my drift.

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

Go for something that drags time. Like an ice cream parlor to sit down and talk. $20 can last you for a day if you know what to do with it : I used to spend $3 for 5 hours in a game arcade.

I wish we still had an arcade here. They shut them all down for "corrupting the youth" or something like that. As for ice cream parlors, we have three, all of which are overpriced. The pizza parlor still exists but I don't think she likes pizza that much.

I think I need to figure out what people DO in their spare time...

[Tsuyoshi]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

Considering the fact that whatever I say always seem to piss her off in one way or another (I'd like to know why), it is highly likely she is going to smash my face in. Though I can be mean and make her waste an air ticket by lying to her that I slept with her sister, then again I might not live to see next week. She is one fun girl to tease.

Since I am not a girl with an imouto myself, I can't understand why she is so protective of that younger girl. C'mon, she is turning 18 this year, give her a break. And give me a break too, it is not like I am going to one-night stand her little sis upon her birthday.

Assuming her behaviour is reasonable, it would still result in me getting threatened or injured one way or another. To quote her, I am "fun to punch".

Ever considered that perhaps she says that kinda thing about you because you told her she looks cute when she's angry?

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

P.S : That little girl asked me to go to her house on Friday night to help her study. I am sure she knows of my shitty grades back in junior college, so this is rather suspicious. Should I go?

What if she doesn't know? Tell her beforehand and see what her opinion will be. If you don't want to go, don't go. It's your call. You don't seem to like her despite what you said about her being irresistable, so why waste your time even if your grades were good?

[Ascaloth]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

Considering the fact that whatever I say always seem to piss her off in one way or another (I'd like to know why), it is highly likely she is going to smash my face in. Though I can be mean and make her waste an air ticket by lying to her that I slept with her sister, then again I might not live to see next week. She is one fun girl to tease.

You know, something as serious as this is one of the rare occasions where it is okay for you to get rough with the tsundere if she goes unreasonable on you. If you know you're not in the wrong, insist on that fact at her. Hard, if you have to.

I'll never understand what people see in RL tsunderes, myself. Can't stand them.

Since I am not a girl with an imouto myself, I can't understand why she is so protective of that younger girl. C'mon, she is turning 18 this year, give her a break. And give me a break too, it is not like I am going to one-night stand her little sis upon her birthday.

Dude, don't tell me, tell her.

P.S : That little girl asked me to go to her house on Friday night to help her study. I am sure she knows of my shitty grades back in junior college, so this is rather suspicious. Should I go?

If you want to lose your cherry, of course.