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Old 2010-09-30, 17:29   Link #27321
RadiantBeam
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So... offering to the thread.

Writing style's a bit disjointed this time around, and I apologize if it doesn't flow as well as my usual stuff does; I just needed to vent. We found out late last night that a kid on campus had committed suicide, and over the course of today I've learned details about the whole affair that makes me furious and sick to my stomach. I needed to let the feelings out somehow, hence this short.

Also, for some reason I wrote from Yuuno's POV. I don't really know why, it just flowed out that way.

Lyrics at the beginning are from "Skeptics And True Believers" by The Academy Is. Might not be fitting, but those particular words got stuck in my head for this piece, so I plugged them in.

Spoiler for Beyond Understanding:


EDIT: Pageclaim for Clementi, who deserved far better than what he got.
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Old 2010-09-30, 17:37   Link #27322
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So you go to Rutgers University too, RB?

I just read the story on Sankaku Complex. Not sure what to say except... WTF?
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Old 2010-09-30, 17:39   Link #27323
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yasanagi View Post
So you go to Rutgers University too, RB?

I just read the story on Sankaku Complex. Not sure what to say except... WTF?
Yeah, I'm in my sophmore year right now. I never knew the boy personally, but something about it just really hit me hard, and I haven't been able to get it off my mind.
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Old 2010-09-30, 17:47   Link #27324
shiroi mahotsukai
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Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
So... offering to the thread.

Writing style's a bit disjointed this time around, and I apologize if it doesn't flow as well as my usual stuff does; I just needed to vent. We found out late last night that a kid on campus had committed suicide, and over the course of today I've learned details about the whole affair that makes me furious and sick to my stomach. I needed to let the feelings out somehow, hence this short.

Also, for some reason I wrote from Yuuno's POV. I don't really know why, it just flowed out that way.

Lyrics at the beginning are from "Skeptics And True Believers" by The Academy Is. Might not be fitting, but those particular words got stuck in my head for this piece, so I plugged them in.

Spoiler for Beyond Understanding:


EDIT: Pageclaim for Clementi, who deserved far better than what he got.
I...I think I'm going to cry, this brought up feelings i thought were dead. It really puts things in perspective. How well can one truly know another human being? I feel really bad for the poor kid, what could have driven them to that? Tthat's it I'm definitly going to cry, this brings up personal memories (a natural death not suicide, but just as sudden), the hollow empty feeling you get when you hear the news, and then the crying (i didn't attend school for three days), and the regret that you didn't spend more time with them, that you didn't bond more, that you weren't there to say good bye. But I digress, i like the way it's written since it conveys Yuuno's feelings really well, you can just see the scene, a bright happy day for everyone else and yet a time of deepest mourning for those involved. The constant nagging feeling "maybe i could have done something. Why didn't i see it coming."

Oddly It's true what they say time heals all wounds, i find i'm able to talk about it now when i never could. Thank you for allowing me to realise that.
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Old 2010-09-30, 17:48   Link #27325
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Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
Yeah, I'm in my sophmore year right now. I never knew the boy personally, but something about it just really hit me hard, and I haven't been able to get it off my mind.
Holy crap. I read the news earlier today; didn't know you go to that university. I can't really imagine how shocking it must have been to hear that... I hope you're all right.

At least the heartless assholes who caused this are facing a possible prison sentence.
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Old 2010-09-30, 17:54   Link #27326
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Originally Posted by SNobleJr View Post
Holy crap. I read the news earlier today; didn't know you go to that university. I can't really imagine how shocking it must have been to hear that... I hope you're all right.

At least the heartless assholes who caused this are facing a possible prison sentence.
Handling it is how I'd put it, I guess. I never knew the boy personally, though apparently he was a member of my campus community. The whole situation has just left me feeling shocked and sick about what people are willing to do for a thrill.
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Old 2010-09-30, 18:16   Link #27327
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Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
So... offering to the thread.

Writing style's a bit disjointed this time around, and I apologize if it doesn't flow as well as my usual stuff does; I just needed to vent. We found out late last night that a kid on campus had committed suicide, and over the course of today I've learned details about the whole affair that makes me furious and sick to my stomach. I needed to let the feelings out somehow, hence this short.

Also, for some reason I wrote from Yuuno's POV. I don't really know why, it just flowed out that way.

Lyrics at the beginning are from "Skeptics And True Believers" by The Academy Is. Might not be fitting, but those particular words got stuck in my head for this piece, so I plugged them in.

Spoiler for Beyond Understanding:


EDIT: Pageclaim for Clementi, who deserved far better than what he got.
That's pretty sad. I understand how you feel, someone that attended the same school as me for a short while committed suicide not to long ago.
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Old 2010-09-30, 18:26   Link #27328
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
So... offering to the thread.

Writing style's a bit disjointed this time around, and I apologize if it doesn't flow as well as my usual stuff does; I just needed to vent. We found out late last night that a kid on campus had committed suicide, and over the course of today I've learned details about the whole affair that makes me furious and sick to my stomach. I needed to let the feelings out somehow, hence this short.

Also, for some reason I wrote from Yuuno's POV. I don't really know why, it just flowed out that way.

Lyrics at the beginning are from "Skeptics And True Believers" by The Academy Is. Might not be fitting, but those particular words got stuck in my head for this piece, so I plugged them in.

Spoiler for Beyond Understanding:


EDIT: Pageclaim for Clementi, who deserved far better than what he got.
This was good. While I've never known anyone who committed suicide myself, I have lost those who I regret not being closer to. You captured that feeling quite well.
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Old 2010-09-30, 23:41   Link #27329
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Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
So... offering to the thread.

Writing style's a bit disjointed this time around, and I apologize if it doesn't flow as well as my usual stuff does; I just needed to vent. We found out late last night that a kid on campus had committed suicide, and over the course of today I've learned details about the whole affair that makes me furious and sick to my stomach. I needed to let the feelings out somehow, hence this short.

Also, for some reason I wrote from Yuuno's POV. I don't really know why, it just flowed out that way.

Lyrics at the beginning are from "Skeptics And True Believers" by The Academy Is. Might not be fitting, but those particular words got stuck in my head for this piece, so I plugged them in.

Spoiler for Beyond Understanding:


EDIT: Pageclaim for Clementi, who deserved far better than what he got.
I like the nod of Fate's feelings towards Precia. We see in the series that Fate is sympathetic towards Precia, even past the abuse. When Yuuno referenced the "speed demon" part, I thought that Fate had died in a car accident, until I kept on reading.

Sad, that Yuuno felt that he didn't know Fate well at all--I can believe it, as either Fate really came to accept and understand her life in StrikerS, or she was still hiding a little old pain underneath it all. Clearly in this fic, Fate had some problems that she couldn't get over, in the end.
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Old 2010-10-01, 06:56   Link #27330
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Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
So... offering to the thread.

Writing style's a bit disjointed this time around, and I apologize if it doesn't flow as well as my usual stuff does; I just needed to vent. We found out late last night that a kid on campus had committed suicide, and over the course of today I've learned details about the whole affair that makes me furious and sick to my stomach. I needed to let the feelings out somehow, hence this short.

Also, for some reason I wrote from Yuuno's POV. I don't really know why, it just flowed out that way.

Lyrics at the beginning are from "Skeptics And True Believers" by The Academy Is. Might not be fitting, but those particular words got stuck in my head for this piece, so I plugged them in.

Spoiler for Beyond Understanding:


EDIT: Pageclaim for Clementi, who deserved far better than what he got.
*hugs*

These sorts of situations are always hard, and it doesn't make it any better when the situation is such that there's something to blame... I think it makes it worse, personally. I'm furious too. And I'm so sorry that you (and the whole Rutgers community) have to deal with this.

I was looking back over the stuff I sent you for BtE, and found that piece I wrote that was essentially for you. Can we have muse strikes for something other than death, plz? kthxbai.

And with that, I think this weekend should be a writing weekend.
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Old 2010-10-01, 07:54   Link #27331
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
So... offering to the thread.

Writing style's a bit disjointed this time around, and I apologize if it doesn't flow as well as my usual stuff does; I just needed to vent. We found out late last night that a kid on campus had committed suicide, and over the course of today I've learned details about the whole affair that makes me furious and sick to my stomach. I needed to let the feelings out somehow, hence this short.

Also, for some reason I wrote from Yuuno's POV. I don't really know why, it just flowed out that way.

Lyrics at the beginning are from "Skeptics And True Believers" by The Academy Is. Might not be fitting, but those particular words got stuck in my head for this piece, so I plugged them in.

Spoiler for Beyond Understanding:


EDIT: Pageclaim for Clementi, who deserved far better than what he got.
Oh, man... I guess this is what I get for not following the FFT too closely, I heard about this story but had no idea you went to that school... sorry to hear this. I guess we can take a little comfort in that they caught the ones responsible. Hopefully having someone to focus all that anger and confusion on lets the poor guy's friends and family sleep a little better at night.

As for the story itself, it really is a touching piece. I think it gets across the sheer helplessness of being the 'one left behind' very well.
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Old 2010-10-01, 10:45   Link #27332
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Just going to leave this here.

Gaiden Chapter is up on FF.Net
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Old 2010-10-01, 13:13   Link #27333
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Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
So... offering to the thread.

Writing style's a bit disjointed this time around, and I apologize if it doesn't flow as well as my usual stuff does; I just needed to vent. We found out late last night that a kid on campus had committed suicide, and over the course of today I've learned details about the whole affair that makes me furious and sick to my stomach. I needed to let the feelings out somehow, hence this short.

Also, for some reason I wrote from Yuuno's POV. I don't really know why, it just flowed out that way.

Lyrics at the beginning are from "Skeptics And True Believers" by The Academy Is. Might not be fitting, but those particular words got stuck in my head for this piece, so I plugged them in.

Spoiler for Beyond Understanding:


EDIT: Pageclaim for Clementi, who deserved far better than what he got.
This reminds me of House M.D., Kutner's death.

I hope the culprit gets the proper punishment for his crime.

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Originally Posted by Nanya01 View Post
@Tiresias: Tense problems, LOTS of tense problems.

Try to keep it past tense as much as possible.
Thank you very much for the advice. I really need to brush up my english

I'm currently fixing the old chapters. Meanwhile, for those interested:
Spoiler for sneak peek:


More advice would be appreciated
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Old 2010-10-01, 14:17   Link #27334
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I hope the culprit gets the proper punishment for his crime.
Well, the only crime he's guilty of is invasion of privacy. He can't be held responsible for the other guy's suicide, or atleast I don't think he should.

I know this sounds harsh, but I'm pretty sure I've said this before: I have no sympathy for those who commit suicide. Killing yourself is the coward's way out. No matter how hard things are you can overcome them if you stay strong. In the end commiting suicide is a choice that a person makes, and no one else can be held responsible.

The real victims here are those left behind. They're the ones who have to live with it afterwards, something those who kill themselves often ignore.

RB's fic was really good at showing that. The pain, confusion and guilt about it all was displayed fantastically. It's Yuuno and the others you feel sympathy for, not Fate. Fate took her life just because things weren't working out for her and I refuse to feel sorry for her. She's the one at fault here because it was her choice to jump. Should Nanoha be held responsible because her rejecting Fate's feelings was the cause? No. Is she probably going to blame herself anyways? Definitely. She's the one who deserves the sympathy.

I know this is a touchy subject and my views will probably not sit well with some, but suicide just makes me angry.
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Old 2010-10-02, 13:53   Link #27335
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Well, the only crime he's guilty of is invasion of privacy. He can't be held responsible for the other guy's suicide, or atleast I don't think he should.
I'm iffy about the legalities involved, but driving someone into committing suicide is a crime, I believe. Oddly enough though, I do agree with you in that he can't be held responsible for the other guy's suicide. However, he should still be responsible for his immature lack of judgment that resulted in someone's death. It makes me sad that people even find something like that amusing and a spectacle to watch--and as many other cases show, lots of people think that humiliating someone is funny/okay, and only when someone dies do they realize that it's wrong. People should have the empathy to know it's wrong before victims have to die to prove the point.

Quote:
I know this sounds harsh, but I'm pretty sure I've said this before: I have no sympathy for those who commit suicide. Killing yourself is the coward's way out. No matter how hard things are you can overcome them if you stay strong. In the end commiting suicide is a choice that a person makes, and no one else can be held responsible.

The real victims here are those left behind. They're the ones who have to live with it afterwards, something those who kill themselves often ignore.
You're entitled to your opinion, definitely. I find that I believe that one of the major differences between those who do commit suicide and those who don't are the social support systems that they have. Some people are lucky to have supportive family and friends and the right kind of help that they need to endure through their troubles. Other people don't, and it's not anyone's fault that they don't. It's just sad.

While I agree that yes, suicide is a choice, I think that for those who do it's a choice that they feel that they were forced into--when to them, it's their only choice possible. Whether or not that's true, it's not a choice that people make lightly, or that they want to make.

Quote:
RB's fic was really good at showing that. The pain, confusion and guilt about it all was displayed fantastically. It's Yuuno and the others you feel sympathy for, not Fate. Fate took her life just because things weren't working out for her and I refuse to feel sorry for her. She's the one at fault here because it was her choice to jump. Should Nanoha be held responsible because her rejecting Fate's feelings was the cause? No. Is she probably going to blame herself anyways? Definitely. She's the one who deserves the sympathy.

I know this is a touchy subject and my views will probably not sit well with some, but suicide just makes me angry.
Well, I found myself feeling pretty sorry for Fate too. The fic didn't show us anything about Fate's thoughts or feelings, so who knows exactly why she finally, after enduring it for so long, decided to jump? Of course Nanoha isn't at fault for rejecting Fate, but I don't believe that it's fair to lump all the responsibility upon Fate's head, or assume that she didn't think about how her actions could impact her loved ones at all--maybe she did worry about that, but felt like she had no other choice in the end. Depression isn't just inside the mind, as people commonly believe--the physical body contributes a lot to depression, and that's not something that people can control just by trying to think happier. There's not enough in the fic to show Fate's side of it. I do feel bad for Nanoha too, since like you say she's going to blame herself anyways even though she shouldn't.

I have to keep myself from speculating too deeply into Fate's mind, since we're not shown what's she's thinking, so in a way you do have a good point. From what we see at face value in the fic, it does stir more sympathy for Nanoha and Yuuno than for Fate--but as an active reader I can't quite let myself rule out the fact that without having Fate's side of things, there's no complete picture to make moral judgments. But that's just how I am as a reader.

(It's odd how much I agreed with you in this post, only to be arguing the opposite side! )
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Old 2010-10-02, 14:27   Link #27336
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I won't go into the right or wrong of the situation much. But although I'm a big "personal responsibility" guy, there are times when mental duress will override any sensibilities and cause one to do things they normally wouldn't. Perhaps not to the point of total blamelessness, but covering a decent amount of it.

Anyway, without further ado, I think I'll stoke the flames of my own mini-controversy, heh.

Future Tense

Chapter 20: Family, Part 2


In which Nanoha learns about Ix, and someone else learns about Nanoha...

Chapters 1 thru 18 can be found here.
Chapter 19 (not yet posted to ff.net) can be found here.

Spoiler for Future Tense, Chapter 20: Family, Part 2:


/puts on flame suit along with baseball catcher pads, facemask, and gear

Hit me!
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Old 2010-10-02, 17:42   Link #27337
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I won't go into the right or wrong of the situation much. But although I'm a big "personal responsibility" guy, there are times when mental duress will override any sensibilities and cause one to do things they normally wouldn't. Perhaps not to the point of total blamelessness, but covering a decent amount of it.

Anyway, without further ado, I think I'll stoke the flames of my own mini-controversy, heh.

Future Tense

Chapter 20: Family, Part 2


In which Nanoha learns about Ix, and someone else learns about Nanoha...

Chapters 1 thru 18 can be found here.
Chapter 19 (not yet posted to ff.net) can be found here.

Spoiler for Future Tense, Chapter 20: Family, Part 2:


/puts on flame suit along with baseball catcher pads, facemask, and gear

Hit me!
'Bound by Fate'... So Fate is going to use a lot of bindings in the fight?

So, for the fight... Nanoha doesn't know everything that Raging Heart can do and Fate has more experience. That sounds more and more like the S1 fight the more this go. If Nanoha want to win this, she'll either have to do something unlike her, something Fate will never expect... Or Fate gets 'Bound by Nanoha' before she receives a rebefriending.
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Old 2010-10-02, 21:23   Link #27338
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaijo View Post
I won't go into the right or wrong of the situation much. But although I'm a big "personal responsibility" guy, there are times when mental duress will override any sensibilities and cause one to do things they normally wouldn't. Perhaps not to the point of total blamelessness, but covering a decent amount of it.

Anyway, without further ado, I think I'll stoke the flames of my own mini-controversy, heh.

Future Tense

Chapter 20: Family, Part 2


In which Nanoha learns about Ix, and someone else learns about Nanoha...

Chapters 1 thru 18 can be found here.
Chapter 19 (not yet posted to ff.net) can be found here.

Spoiler for Future Tense, Chapter 20: Family, Part 2:


/puts on flame suit along with baseball catcher pads, facemask, and gear

Hit me!
*PUNCH*

You said "Hit Me".

Fixes in quote.

Very interesting chapter, Kaijo.

What's going to happen next, I wonder...

This will be good.
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Old 2010-10-02, 21:34   Link #27339
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*PUNCH*

You said "Hit Me".

Fixes in quote.

Very interesting chapter, Kaijo.

What's going to happen next, I wonder...

This will be good.
About your fixes, the name of the undead created by Ixy is spelled "Mariage", so its not a mistake.
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Old 2010-10-02, 21:44   Link #27340
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About your fixes, the name of the undead created by Ixy is spelled "Mariage", so its not a mistake.
Wait, what?

...

Damn spellchecker.

Never mind then.
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