Valkyria Chronicles FanFiction Discussion

[Runty]

Originally Posted by Snowman24

Well if you can think of some fitting quotes, lol, just write them down and I'll stick them into my final edit when the whole thing is done.

*because I'm honestly not too sure who would say what in this situation.

Just a few lines of things like "What's going on over there?" and stuff like that would be fine. Nothing major.

[Runty]

I have a rough idea on a story that could star Noel. It'd also include a guest appearance by Susie.

Spoiler for Noel:

Lanseal is informed that Susie Evans, daughter of the Evans family, has been kidnapped by Rebel spies and is being held in a heavily defended region of Rebel territory. Class G, among other classes, is dispatched to rescue Susie, along with completing other key objectives in the area. Class G's job, however, is rescuing Susie. The Gallian high command wants Susie brought back alive since her parents are strong supporters of Cordelia's rule.

Noel has heard of Susie's reputation as "Squad Seven's Saint", though she doesn't quite know why Susie is called that. Class G reaches the facility where Susie is being held captive, and Noel is sent in as part of the group that is to perform the rescue. They find Susie being held by the Rebels, though she is completely unharmed. She is a little squeamish, however, at seeing the number of Rebels Class G killed to get through to her.

Unfortunately, it turns out that Susie was bait for a trap set by the Rebels. Rebel reinforcements arrive and attack Class G. Though Noel gives Susie a pistol to defend herself, Susie ends up being frozen in terror when a Rebel attacks her. This ends with one of the cadets (you pick which one) being wounded while defending Susie. Noel calls her out on this, though Susie is too frightened to give a response.

At this moment, a Rebel-based artillery strike is directed at the facility, which ends up wounding a few Class G cadets and several Rebels as well. Noel and Susie, who get separated from the others, find a wounded Rebel who is surely going to die, but is begging for help. Knowing she cannot save him, Susie comforts the Rebel and eases his passing. Noel sees here why Susie was called a saint. The two are shortly afterwards rescued from the debris by the other cadets.

Susie is at first brought back to Lanseal before she is to be sent back to Randgriz, which allows her to meet with Welkin and Alicia. Noel joins her in the discussion, asking Welkin and Alicia some questions about Susie.

Make some tweaks as you wish.

[Snowman24]

That sounds good, only think I'd probably add as my own little touch, would be;

Spoiler for Noel suggestion:

As they're about to pull out to evacute Susie, Noel is tasked with watching her while the others clear the path ahead. Suddenly, a small group of rebels emerges from a nearby building that the class missed and is making a break for it.

Noel tells Susie that she can get them all in one hit, thanks to her marksmanship with a mortar and takes aim. But, Susie being the humanitarian that she is, runs up and trys to stop Noel by tipping her lance up at the last minute. Which makes the round fly high and strike an already severly battle damaged building and it starts to crumble.

Noel grabs susie and they run towards the opening of a basement of a nearby building and managed to make it in just before the tall building crashes into the ground and the exit becomes blocked by the massive amount of debris.

Noel then grabs Susie and shakes her as she screams at how stupid of a move that was just now and how Susie alomst killed them both. But Susie points out that the Rebels weren't moving to ambush the other Class G students from behind, but running towards the woods in a scattered formation, obviously retreating.

Noel was too worked up from the battle that she didn't notice that. But before anything else could be said, they hearing sounds of moaning. Noel draws her sidearm and heads further into the basement to locate the source and they come upon a makeshift Rebel field hospital, with four or five severely wounded Rebels laying about. There are no medics or medical supplies, and its clear that they were abandoned because of the severity of their wounds and the Rebels quick withdrawal.

Noel wants to shoot them, to end their suffering. But again Susie stops her and pleads to Noel that they have to help them. Noel refuses, saying that they're rebels and she won't help those who are trying to destroy Gallia. And after some arguing, Noel gets frustrated and opts to search for another way out, leaving susie behind for a moment.

But after some searching, there is no other way out. And all they can do is wait and hope someone finds them. She gets the surprise of her life when she returns to find Susie, tending to the Rebels to the best of her ability. She only manages to save two, the other two or three are too far gone. But she stays next to them, talks to them or even sings to them as they pass away, one by one.

Noel can't believe that Susie would so willingly help and comfort those who kidnapped her and threatened to kill her. What surprises her is that once they other two rebels are stabilized and fall asleep, Susie breaks down and cries over how she wasn't able to save them all...

[Runty]

Originally Posted by Snowman24

That sounds good, only think I'd probably add as my own little touch, would be;

Spoiler for Noel suggestion:

As they're about to pull out to evacute Susie, Noel is tasked with watching her while the others clear the path ahead. Suddenly, a small group of rebels emerges from a nearby building that the class missed and is making a break for it.

Noel tells Susie that she can get them all in one hit, thanks to her marksmanship with a mortar and takes aim. But, Susie being the humanitarian that she is, runs up and trys to stop Noel by tipping her lance up at the last minute. Which makes the round fly high and strike an already severly battle damaged building and it starts to crumble.

Noel grabs susie and they run towards the opening of a basement of a nearby building and managed to make it in just before the tall building crashes into the ground and the exit becomes blocked by the massive amount of debris.

Noel then grabs Susie and shakes her as she screams at how stupid of a move that was just now and how Susie alomst killed them both. But Susie points out that the Rebels weren't moving to ambush the other Class G students from behind, but running towards the woods in a scattered formation, obviously retreating.

Noel was too worked up from the battle that she didn't notice that. But before anything else could be said, they hearing sounds of moaning. Noel draws her sidearm and heads further into the basement to locate the source and they come upon a makeshift Rebel field hospital, with four or five severely wounded Rebels laying about. There are no medics or medical supplies, and its clear that they were abandoned because of the severity of their wounds and the Rebels quick withdrawal.

Noel wants to shoot them, to end their suffering. But again Susie stops her and pleads to Noel that they have to help them. Noel refuses, saying that they're rebels and she won't help those who are trying to destroy Gallia. And after some arguing, Noel gets frustrated and opts to search for another way out, leaving susie behind for a moment.

But after some searching, there is no other way out. And all they can do is wait and hope someone finds them. She gets the surprise of her life when she returns to find Susie, tending to the Rebels to the best of her ability. She only manages to save two, the other two or three are too far gone. But she stays next to them, talks to them or even sings to them as they pass away, one by one.

Noel can't believe that Susie would so willingly help and comfort those who kidnapped her and threatened to kill her. What surprises her is that once they other two rebels are stabilized and fall asleep, Susie breaks down and cries over how she wasn't able to save them all...

Very nice. Go for it.

[Runty]

So which are you planning to go for first, Snowman? Franca or Noel?

[Snowman24]

Lol, they both seem equally hard... I still haven't decided yet. But I think I'll try and get a preview up for the Noel one sometime tonight, be a few hours yet.

[Runty]

Originally Posted by Snowman24

Lol, they both seem equally hard... I still haven't decided yet. But I think I'll try and get a preview up for the Noel one sometime tonight, be a few hours yet.

That sounds like it'll be nice.

[Runty]

Had some trouble with the Noel preview?

[Snowman24]

Sort of, I had a idea for a fanfic that I couldn't pass up. It's VC unrelated, its a Dragon Age 2 fanfic. It was burning in my brain so much that once I opened up word processor, I started typing it instead of the Noel one. I wanted to get it down before I forgot.

I'll get back on the Noel one later, hopefully soon, even more hopeful I'll get it tonight sometime *A better preview, but for now, here's what I got.*

Spoiler for Noel tiny preview:

Three days... three long, terrible days the girls and their rebel enemies were stuck in this deep dark, dank basement. It smelled like mildew and other unpleasent scents that floated in the heavy air. What made it worse was that there was no food, and only a few cupfuls of water at the most.

Noel sat with her head against the concrete wall, her stomach growled constantly and she had never before been so hungry in her entire life. Her hand trembled from hunger and weakness as she attempted to continue writing in her small note pad, like a diary. She wasn't too keen on reading it when and if they got out in time, but it kept her mind off of everything else, so it was a welcome distraction.

“Day Three… is it morning, noon or night? I do not know anymore… Because it is always dark down here, except for that one tiny light bulb overhead that thankfully hasn’t gone out yet.

I’m starving… we haven’t eaten anything since we became trapped down here. We’ve been carefully sipping our water supply, which is almost gone. It was in a very large container and could have easily kept Susie and I alive for a week… if it were only the two of us. Sadly, it isn’t.

I don’t know how we got into a mess like this… trapped underground, along with two other Rebel soldiers who were wounded in the fighting earlier. There were five of them when we first got down here, but now… there’s only two and they’re in pretty bad shape.

I’m sad to write that we lost Derek last night… Susie tried her best to save him and is pretty torn up about it. But his wounds were just too severe and we still haven’t been dug out of this pit…

I can hear the other Class G students digging up above, but its dull and sounds pretty far away, even still. But I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised, considering the size of building that nearly crushed us and blocked off the only exit out of this concrete prison…”

“Noel!” Susie called out, “Come here, I need to talk to you.”

Noel sighed, closed her notebook and stuffed it back into her rear pouch. She then shuffled weakly over to Susie and asked, “Yes… What is it?”

“Adam and Greg aren’t looking too well,” Susie whispered, “I’ve been cleaning and cleaning their wounds, but they looked pretty infected now… I fear we may lose them both if we’re not rescued soon.”

Noel shook her head, “I don’t mean to sound mean, but… have you ever considered how much of our water you’re wasting by treating these rebel wounded?” Noel asked, “I’ve still got my sidearm pistol… I think we should do the humane thing and put them out of their misery.”

“This again?!” Susie exclaimed, “I already told you, No! We aren’t going to do that! We have to help them!”

Noel shook her head again, “I just don’t understand you, Susie. Or how you managed to survive all throughout the last war…”

“I don’t expect you to,” Susie replied, “Not many of my former squad members in the last war understood me either. But I am who I am. And I’ll stick by these men and continue to help them.”

Noel gave up and sighed out loud, then turned and walked back to her section of the small basement room. As she sat against the wall and slowly shook her head back and forth, she recalled the events that lead them to this predicament...

It was quite difficult deciding where to start, and I'm not sure if this is the right way. I decided to start AFTER the battle, right down in the basement to begin with. What do ya think? Or should I start earlier?

Where it is now, it shows where the girls will end up, but Noel will think back to how they came to be here. Still... it doesn't quite sound good. Maybe I'll change it later, thoughts?

[Runty]

Originally Posted by Snowman24

Sort of, I had a idea for a fanfic that I couldn't pass up. It's VC unrelated, its a Dragon Age 2 fanfic. It was burning in my brain so much that once I opened up word processor, I started typing it instead of the Noel one. I wanted to get it down before I forgot.

I'll get back on the Noel one later, hopefully soon, even more hopeful I'll get it tonight sometime *A better preview, but for now, here's what I got.*

Spoiler for Noel tiny preview:

Three days... three long, terrible days the girls and their rebel enemies were stuck in this deep dark, dank basement. It smelled like mildew and other unpleasent scents that floated in the heavy air. What made it worse was that there was no food, and only a few cupfuls of water at the most.

Noel sat with her head against the concrete wall, her stomach growled constantly and she had never before been so hungry in her entire life. Her hand trembled from hunger and weakness as she attempted to continue writing in her small note pad, like a diary. She wasn't too keen on reading it when and if they got out in time, but it kept her mind off of everything else, so it was a welcome distraction.

“Day Three… is it morning, noon or night? I do not know anymore… Because it is always dark down here, except for that one tiny light bulb overhead that thankfully hasn’t gone out yet.

I’m starving… we haven’t eaten anything since we became trapped down here. We’ve been carefully sipping our water supply, which is almost gone. It was in a very large container and could have easily kept Susie and I alive for a week… if it were only the two of us. Sadly, it isn’t.

I don’t know how we got into a mess like this… trapped underground, along with two other Rebel soldiers who were wounded in the fighting earlier. There were five of them when we first got down here, but now… there’s only two and they’re in pretty bad shape.

I’m sad to write that we lost Derek last night… Susie tried her best to save him and is pretty torn up about it. But his wounds were just too severe and we still haven’t been dug out of this pit…

I can hear the other Class G students digging up above, but its dull and sounds pretty far away, even still. But I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised, considering the size of building that nearly crushed us and blocked off the only exit out of this concrete prison…”

“Noel!” Susie called out, “Come here, I need to talk to you.”

Noel sighed, closed her notebook and stuffed it back into her rear pouch. She then shuffled weakly over to Susie and asked, “Yes… What is it?”

“Adam and Greg aren’t looking too well,” Susie whispered, “I’ve been cleaning and cleaning their wounds, but they looked pretty infected now… I fear we may lose them both if we’re not rescued soon.”

Noel shook her head, “I don’t mean to sound mean, but… have you ever considered how much of our water you’re wasting by treating these rebel wounded?” Noel asked, “I’ve still got my sidearm pistol… I think we should do the humane thing and put them out of their misery.”

“This again?!” Susie exclaimed, “I already told you, No! We aren’t going to do that! We have to help them!”

Noel shook her head again, “I just don’t understand you, Susie. Or how you managed to survive all throughout the last war…”

“I don’t expect you to,” Susie replied, “Not many of my former squad members in the last war understood me either. But I am who I am. And I’ll stick by these men and continue to help them.”

Noel gave up and sighed out loud, then turned and walked back to her section of the small basement room. As she sat against the wall and slowly shook her head back and forth, she recalled the events that lead them to this predicament...

It was quite difficult deciding where to start, and I'm not sure if this is the right way. I decided to start AFTER the battle, right down in the basement to begin with. What do ya think? Or should I start earlier?

Where it is now, it shows where the girls will end up, but Noel will think back to how they came to be here. Still... it doesn't quite sound good. Maybe I'll change it later, thoughts?

Definitely sounds like you wrote that a little hastily.

Spoiler for Suggestions:

I'd have it, for one, that Noel and Susie aren't trapped for a few days; a few hours at most. After all, if they were down there for 3 days, they would probably run out of air to breathe. Plus I don't think Class G would be permitted by High Command to stay for so long in trying to rescue Noel and Susie.

Your idea on the flashback would be neat, but IMO you should have it in the usual style of starting with Class G heading into the mission. That'd be easier to work with, IMO, and would allow for better preview cliffhangers!

You captured Susie's personality pretty nicely. Are you going to have her take on some of her anime traits (i.e. prone to fainting)? As a tidbit, it'd be ideal if you have it so that Susie never shot or killed anyone in the war. It'd make sense, especially in relation to her title of "Saint".

[Runty]

I just realized... I haven't gotten reviews on my 10th chapter for Lone Wulf yet from Snowman or DC20.

[Snowman24]

Well you certainly know what I've been doing with all my freetime :P The number of fics I've completed and the number more that i'm currently juggling and those near completion.

I don't have anything lined up for summer yet jobwise, think i'll have more time to write/read and do all that stuff. But for now, works killing and I like to add bits to my own fics when I have the time. Don't worry, you'll get a review from me, I read it all the way up till your latest chapter.

And it seems alot of our old comrades in here and over at fanfiction have gone MIA. I still want to read more Wolf Spider , but I ain't seen or heard from Huhn in months, same with DC20, two of my favorite reviewers and yourself, but you're constantly around, which is good.

[Runty]

Originally Posted by Snowman24

Well you certainly know what I've been doing with all my freetime :P The number of fics I've completed and the number more that i'm currently juggling and those near completion.

I don't have anything lined up for summer yet jobwise, think i'll have more time to write/read and do all that stuff. But for now, works killing and I like to add bits to my own fics when I have the time. Don't worry, you'll get a review from me, I read it all the way up till your latest chapter.

And it seems alot of our old comrades in here and over at fanfiction have gone MIA. I still want to read more Wolf Spider , but I ain't seen or heard from Huhn in months, same with DC20, two of my favorite reviewers and yourself, but you're constantly around, which is good.

Ah, that's good to know. DC20's absence has been a real bummer.

Anyhow, think you can put out a proper preview of the Noel fanfic?

[Runty]

You know, Snowman, thinking a good deal on it, that Magari flick you were writing seemed to, well, center a good deal more on Rene. Don't get me wrong; it's still very good stuff, but it seems more like Magari was a plot object rather than the character getting the most development. I still say at some point you should finish it, but probably it could considered Rene's one-shot instead of Magari's.

Don't fret, however. I have another idea on a Magari flick set-up.

Spoiler for Magari:

This event occurs after the Rebel assault on Lanseal, so Aliasse is part of Class G.

Class G is dispatched to Barious to investigate Rebel activity in the area. The class discovers that a small Rebel detachment has entered Barious Ruins, yet they don't know what the Rebels are up to. Before they can determine it, however, they are spotted and the Rebels attack. During the battle, however, Magari ends up almost being hit by an artillery round. Said round, however, causes the ground beneath her feet to break away, sending her and Rene underground and, through a stroke of luck, into part of the Valkyrur Tomb (which resides under Barious Ruins).

Trapped inside the ruins by debris, the two are forced to make their way through ancient traps to escape. Luckily, Magari's intelligence helps the two bypass the traps. Reaching the inner chamber, however, Magari and Rene discover that the Rebels are planning to blow up everything inside, trying to keep some secret. As it turns out, they're led by none other than Audrey Gassenarl, who spots the two and orders her men to kill them.

The girls run and elude the Rebels, but Magari wants to stop them from destroying the tomb. Rene agrees when she realizes that, if they don't, they'll be buried alive or killed in the explosion, since they can't get out. Unfortunately, the main bomb is guarded by the Rebels (who are still setting more explosives), so Rene decides to act as bait and draw the Rebels away while Magari sneaks up and disarms the explosive. Magari succeeds in disarming the bomb, but Rene is captured by two remaining soldiers and the Rebels order Magari to surrender, or Rene will be executed.

Magari, however, sees that the Rebels are holding Rene close to an ancient Valkyrur trap, so she tricks them into getting too close, and one of them accidentally triggers it. The trap kills one of the Rebels, allowing Rene to shoot the other one in self defense with a pistol. The Rebel, however, in his dying breath, tries to kill Magari by shooting a stack of TNT behind her. The shockwave causes Magari to slip and fall off a platform, leaving her dangling by one hand. Rene saves her just before she falls.

As the two rest from their adventure, Magari sees a large tablet written in ancient Valkyrur script. Having learned such script, Magari reads it, and discovers to her shock the true history of the Valkyrur (the same records Faldio found at Barious), and the truth of the Darcsen Calamity. Rene suggests telling everyone about it, but Magari dismisses this idea, saying that even if Cordelia herself were to reveal this, people like the Rebels would simply choose to deny the truth, and would never believe the story. Rene doesn't like this idea, but understands when Magari says she feels that, someday, the truth will come out.

Shortly afterward, the two are found by the rest of Class G; thanks to Aliasse, they were able to enter the Tomb (to explain how Audrey entered, she had a V2 open the chamber). The Rebels have pulled out of the area, so the Class decides to return to Lanseal. On the way, however, Magari decides to at least tell Class G the truth.

Sounds much more like Magari would be the star, right? Tell me what you think.

[RedShocktrooper]

And I have an utterly different idea unrelated to VC2:

Spoiler for Something different:

Ok, picture this: VC1, if Max had took Alicia, and Welkin meets Selvaria in Bruhl.

Simply put, this is what VC would be if we had our Valks swapped.

The idea for the start of this (this would be a multi-chapter fic by all means) would focus on what the author thought the relationship between Alicia and Max would be (for a change of pace, Max actually gives two bits about Alicia, while her opinion of him can range from him being an older brother to love interest).

Also, Selvaria within normal" hair and eyes, and save for some changes to make her be Alicia to Welkin, you still have what amounts to Selvaria Bles living a normal life. Possibly successful with her curry, even.

[MrTerrorist]

Originally Posted by RedShocktrooper

And I have an utterly different idea unrelated to VC2:

Spoiler for Something different:

Ok, picture this: VC1, if Max had took Alicia, and Welkin meets Selvaria in Bruhl.

Simply put, this is what VC would be if we had our Valks swapped.

The idea for the start of this (this would be a multi-chapter fic by all means) would focus on what the author thought the relationship between Alicia and Max would be (for a change of pace, Max actually gives two bits about Alicia, while her opinion of him can range from him being an older brother to love interest).

Also, Selvaria within normal" hair and eyes, and save for some changes to make her be Alicia to Welkin, you still have what amounts to Selvaria Bles living a normal life. Possibly successful with her curry, even.

Two Words:
DO IT!

[Firefly00]

Originally Posted by RedShocktrooper

And I have an utterly different idea unrelated to VC2...

This sounds quite amusing; extra bonus points if some enterprising fanartist has a go at this ('Face/Off: Valkyria Chronicles Edition'?). Now where'd I put that list of Strange and Interesting ideas...?

[RedShocktrooper]

Let me first state that I originally came up with the idea as something for any takers. But if you guys want me to write it, well, shucks, I guess I'll try to do it justice. I'll need some help, though.

[yezhanquan]

Well, if fate does work in strange ways, perhaps things will indeed be different.

Growing up in the lab might twist Alicia's personality, just as living in an orphanage might widen Selvaria's heart. Can go either way, really.

[yezhanquan]

Here are my plans for the alternate Selvaria and Alicia.

Spoiler for alt. Selvaria:

Selvaria Bles (22) is rather unlike her peers of the same age group. Growing up in an orphanage at Bruhl, Selvaria never knew who her parents were. Regardless, she harboured no bitterness towards them, or towards anyone, for that matter. The girls at the orphanage saw her as their role model. The decent boys all wanted her as a date, while the rogues steer clear of her. Her personal philosophy is: make lemonade when life gives you lemons.

Well-read and a good cook, Selvaria found her calling when the Imperials began their invasion. At the town watch, her knowledge was put into practical use, and with Welkin's return and assuming command of Squad 7, she would prove to be an excellent 2IC.

Spoiler for alt. Alicia:

Dr. Forster never knew how exactly to control this specimen of hers. Alicia Melchiott had a seemingly unbreakable faith in the goodness of Man, despite her exploits in the battlefield. One moment, she would meekly do her part in the experiments, the next, she could be baking away at her quarters, or bothering the guards that litter the Imperial compound.

Truth be told, Alicia felt hurt whenever she's at the lab (or killing people), but she refused to blame anyone for it, not even Dr. Forster. As for Prince Maxmillian, she treated him as an elder brother, while the prince, in return, warmed to her as a little sister, even as he nursed the pain of losing his mother. As the invasion began, Alicia was his secret weapon, to be used by him and him alone. However, the years with her had allowed Max to temper his ambition. In his empire of the future, there is a place for Alicia.

On the attack on her village, Imca could not believe what she saw when she saw the Valkyria. She seemed so small... and despite the distance, she thought she saw the Valkyria cry while razing homes to the ground.