Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha Character Creation and Discussion (second reincarnation)

[Sheba]

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Feh, ignore them. I don't care if they're making the same thing in their own ideas... so long as it turns out GOOD.

Or let them be stuck in their own developer hell. Meh.

[Evangelion Xgouki]

Originally Posted by Comartemis

Eva, I'll ask you again and please answer this time: where the heck is this supposed hostility you're complaining about? I'm about as angry as a doped-up hippie and there's been neither flame nor angry post for many a page now, so what the heck are you complaining about?

Just a precaution. Never hurts to be prepared

[Keroko]

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

Also, new word into Cadia's terminology:

SoDomising: verb, The process of taking suspension of Disbelief anaysis too far and turning something that is supposed to be fun into serious business.

I.E. "You're SoDomising the hell out of magical girl anime."

>:3

Mreh, I'd rather we not use incorrect words like that. SoDomising the hell out of Nanoha would mean we just accept everything that goes on.

SoD, Suspension of Disbelief, means accepting situations, not explaining them. The moment you start explaining them, you're basically saying 'this is impossible' blatantly showing your disbelief of the situations.

[arkhangelsk]

For someone that's unwilling to accept what's shown to him at face value, simply to preserve his images of speed in MGLN, that's a laugh

[Keroko]

For someone who is unwilling to accept anything that does not follow his own standards, regardless how utterly baseless they can get, you have little room to talk.

[Evangelion Xgouki]

Well that was random and uncalled for

[Kha]

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

Also, new word into Cadia's terminology:

SoDomising: verb, The process of taking suspension of Disbelief anaysis too far and turning something that is supposed to be fun into serious business.

I.E. "You're SoDomising the hell out of magical girl anime."

>:3

Somebody call Dr. Mahathir and Anwar!

[Comartemis]

First someone call pest control.

[Kagerou]

Too much talk, not enough writing!
*drops Keroko bomb and RUNS*

Spoiler for Part II?:

The Chronicle of the Black Order/Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha
Episode 00: Watashi wa…. Georashi Keroko…

“So, have we gotten her name yet?”
“Unfortunately, no, we haven’t. It appears that she’s suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder; we
can’t even get her to speak, only the word ‘Georashi’.”

“It would be safe to presume, that word has some meaning… her name perhaps?”
“Geo…rashi…” A man clicked his tongue. “It sounds foreign…” He turned to a German man. “It
sounds European to me.”

“That would make no sense,” Replied the German. “We found her in a Japanese village, and she has
Asian features. Perhaps if she was in a mixed family, but I had never heard of this village before
the disaster…. So it’s unlikely that people from other countries would have either.”

It was called one of the most peculiar disasters of the time. A village in Japan’s outskirts seemed to
cave in on itself, being destroyed utterly. The populace seemed to have turned on themselves in
riotus melee, destroying each other and themselves in the process. However, this didn’t account for
the inexplicable fires that simply refused to be put out, long after their fuel had burned away, nor did
it account for the peculiar part of hollowed out earth a mere kilometer from the village, as if a great
and terrible creature had risen up from the ground. Not only that, but there was a gout of flame from
that so-called ‘emergence point’ to the village that still smoldered. Furthermore, bodies were hanging
off of trees. Some people appeared to have dropped from a great height, perhaps hundreds of meters.

The tallest building in the village was only 20 meters.

People from across the world had gathered to this small village, trying to explain the disaster (and to
quell the fears that this could happen in their countries, too). Americans justified it as a terrorist
attack, but the argument was so flimsy that it changed nothing, so they simply up and left. The
Brits likewise thought it some form of domestic terrorism, but likewise had no evidence to back it
up. They left with the Americans, unable to do anything else, and continued doing absolutely nothing.
Those that stayed called it everything from a natural disaster to an Act of God.

Furthermore was the girl, still alive, found in the center of the village, curled up in a ball with a
peculiar energy surrounding her. Some people swore she was floating. Of course, simply floating
was impossible without magic, and everyone knew that magic didn’t exist.

Somewhere, four-year old Nanoha Takamachi began to cackle madly. Arisa and Suzuka decided to
leave her alone for that day.

The girl was in a strange state. Though she was physically unhurt, a miracle in itself, she acted as
if a great weight was upon her shoulders. She spoke little, and moved little; the only word that
anyone could get out of her was the peculiar word “Georashi”, as noted earlier, but it was still
unknown what it meant.

The girl also showed peculiar mannerisms. Since they couldn’t get her to talk, they sent the girl away
to a nearby hospital while they continued to piece together the mystery of the disaster (someone
found a giant black scale on the ground. Upon picking it up, they went mad until they put it back
down. No one dared to touch that scale). At the hospital, the girl would sit by herself and speak to
no one, and wouldn’t even eat or drink. When asked to draw a picture of what happened, she only
drew a peculiar image of a giant creature eating people merrily. When given toys to play with, she
would violently break them.

She was self-harming. One morning, the doctors found that the girl had somehow managed to sneak
up to the roof of the hospital. She jumped off the roof. She suffered a concussion and a broken
arm. It’s worthy of note that the hospital was about seventy to eighty meters tall. Thus, they locked
the door to her room from the outside.

The next day, she was trying to smash her head against the wall. They tied her down. Eventually,
she calmed down. Afterward, there were no problems out of her.

It should be noted that this took over six months. Not once did she eat or drink or use the restroom
(though she did sleep quite a bit).

The doctors drove themselves insane trying to figure out what she was sustaining herself off of. When
they found nothing, they considered locking her up for all time, using her as experiments and as a
guinea pig.

And then she spoke.

“My name is… Keroko Georashi…” she said to them one morning. “And I am the last of my
people. Please, do not make their deaths a science experiment.”

Mass chaos ensued. Would the physicists and doctors and scientists listen to the request of the
small village’s last survivor, or would they continue to understand its mystery. Japanese politicians
put their foot down; it was a matter of honor to adhere to the girl’s request. They began to expel
those who wanted to pry the enigma apart. Within a few short weeks, the mystery of the destroyed
village would forever remain a mystery and go in the texts of time as a freak accident. In years’ time,
the Pope would herald this as a warning of the End of the World; likewise, a particular cult would
manage to get ahold of the “Scale of the Leviathan” and be driven mad by Deathwing’s dark influence
that still emanated from it.

Deathwing himself thought it was all hilarious as he watched this through the girl’s eyes. Those who
worshipped were a fickle lot after all, he would muse. Give them a ‘sign’ and watch them run with it
to the corners of the Earth. And all of it because he had let this girl survive. Maybe it was more fun
this way, to let her live. He chortled madly, and when he did Earth felt as if a chill had touched its
molten core. That day was freakishly cold for its season.

A kindly doctor decided that it was time for the girl to be reintroduced to society, in a place far
removed from these events. He and Keroko moved to the doctor’s hometown, Uminari City, and thus
put the gears in motion that would entwine the girl’s fate with that of many others.

Eh... I have more written than this, but not a completed scene. I'll get back to that later.

Please make sure I'm doing it right <3

[Wild Goose]

http://ocnano.wikidot.com/commonly-used-terms

There you alls go.

[Evangelion Xgouki]

Originally Posted by Kagerou

Too much talk, not enough writing!
*drops Keroko bomb and RUNS*

Spoiler for Part II?:

The Chronicle of the Black Order/Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha
Episode 00: Watashi wa…. Georashi Keroko…

“So, have we gotten her name yet?”
“Unfortunately, no, we haven’t. It appears that she’s suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder; we
can’t even get her to speak, only the word ‘Georashi’.”

“It would be safe to presume, that word has some meaning… her name perhaps?”
“Geo…rashi…” A man clicked his tongue. “It sounds foreign…” He turned to a German man. “It
sounds European to me.”

“That would make no sense,” Replied the German. “We found her in a Japanese village, and she has
Asian features. Perhaps if she was in a mixed family, but I had never heard of this village before
the disaster…. So it’s unlikely that people from other countries would have either.”

It was called one of the most peculiar disasters of the time. A village in Japan’s outskirts seemed to
cave in on itself, being destroyed utterly. The populace seemed to have turned on themselves in
riotus melee, destroying each other and themselves in the process. However, this didn’t account for
the inexplicable fires that simply refused to be put out, long after their fuel had burned away, nor did
it account for the peculiar part of hollowed out earth a mere kilometer from the village, as if a great
and terrible creature had risen up from the ground. Not only that, but there was a gout of flame from
that so-called ‘emergence point’ to the village that still smoldered. Furthermore, bodies were hanging
off of trees. Some people appeared to have dropped from a great height, perhaps hundreds of meters.

The tallest building in the village was only 20 meters.

People from across the world had gathered to this small village, trying to explain the disaster (and to
quell the fears that this could happen in their countries, too). Americans justified it as a terrorist
attack, but the argument was so flimsy that it changed nothing, so they simply up and left. The
Brits likewise thought it some form of domestic terrorism, but likewise had no evidence to back it
up. They left with the Americans, unable to do anything else, and continued doing absolutely nothing.
Those that stayed called it everything from a natural disaster to an Act of God.

Furthermore was the girl, still alive, found in the center of the village, curled up in a ball with a
peculiar energy surrounding her. Some people swore she was floating. Of course, simply floating
was impossible without magic, and everyone knew that magic didn’t exist.

Somewhere, four-year old Nanoha Takamachi began to cackle madly. Arisa and Suzuka decided to
leave her alone for that day.

The girl was in a strange state. Though she was physically unhurt, a miracle in itself, she acted as
if a great weight was upon her shoulders. She spoke little, and moved little; the only word that
anyone could get out of her was the peculiar word “Georashi”, as noted earlier, but it was still
unknown what it meant.

The girl also showed peculiar mannerisms. Since they couldn’t get her to talk, they sent the girl away
to a nearby hospital while they continued to piece together the mystery of the disaster (someone
found a giant black scale on the ground. Upon picking it up, they went mad until they put it back
down. No one dared to touch that scale). At the hospital, the girl would sit by herself and speak to
no one, and wouldn’t even eat or drink. When asked to draw a picture of what happened, she only
drew a peculiar image of a giant creature eating people merrily. When given toys to play with, she
would violently break them.

She was self-harming. One morning, the doctors found that the girl had somehow managed to sneak
up to the roof of the hospital. She jumped off the roof. She suffered a concussion and a broken
arm. It’s worthy of note that the hospital was about seventy to eighty meters tall. Thus, they locked
the door to her room from the outside.

The next day, she was trying to smash her head against the wall. They tied her down. Eventually,
she calmed down. Afterward, there were no problems out of her.

It should be noted that this took over six months. Not once did she eat or drink or use the restroom
(though she did sleep quite a bit).

The doctors drove themselves insane trying to figure out what she was sustaining herself off of. When
they found nothing, they considered locking her up for all time, using her as experiments and as a
guinea pig.

And then she spoke.

“My name is… Keroko Georashi…” she said to them one morning. “And I am the last of my
people. Please, do not make their deaths a science experiment.”

Mass chaos ensued. Would the physicists and doctors and scientists listen to the request of the
small village’s last survivor, or would they continue to understand its mystery. Japanese politicians
put their foot down; it was a matter of honor to adhere to the girl’s request. They began to expel
those who wanted to pry the enigma apart. Within a few short weeks, the mystery of the destroyed
village would forever remain a mystery and go in the texts of time as a freak accident. In years’ time,
the Pope would herald this as a warning of the End of the World; likewise, a particular cult would
manage to get ahold of the “Scale of the Leviathan” and be driven mad by Deathwing’s dark influence
that still emanated from it.

Deathwing himself thought it was all hilarious as he watched this through the girl’s eyes. Those who
worshipped were a fickle lot after all, he would muse. Give them a ‘sign’ and watch them run with it
to the corners of the Earth. And all of it because he had let this girl survive. Maybe it was more fun
this way, to let her live. He chortled madly, and when he did Earth felt as if a chill had touched its
molten core. That day was freakishly cold for its season.

A kindly doctor decided that it was time for the girl to be reintroduced to society, in a place far
removed from these events. He and Keroko moved to the doctor’s hometown, Uminari City, and thus
put the gears in motion that would entwine the girl’s fate with that of many others.

Eh... I have more written than this, but not a completed scene. I'll get back to that later.

Please make sure I'm doing it right <3

...a 4-year-old Nanoha cackling madly is a rather scary image

[Jimmy C]

And a 4-year old Nanoha wouldn't have met Arisa and Suzuka yet.

[stormturmoil]

Hi all. Another of my infrequent visits, this time for a technical/power-level appraisal of something new I've come up with...

I was re-drawing my Character's Device (again), and came upon a new idea, which I drew out, then considered the implications of. I then came up with a quick run-down of what it would then allow.

picture:


Yes, it's a giant sized HypoDermic needle, which fits somewhat with my character's medical background. Now, since I wanted this thing to have a purpose outside of giving Fried and Voltaire their yearly shots, I came up with a new system to make use of the shape and characteristics of the design, and then added a few bits to the picture to fit in.

description:
Special equipment: Injection system
Description: The ‘needle’ portion of Grey Turmoil can be used, exactly as it appears, as delivery mechanism for a variety of different PseudoMatter based compounds in Solid, Liquid, or Gaseous form. A reservoir of PseudoMatter liquid is maintained around the Device’s coolant stack for the purpose of supplying this system. When used to expel gaseous media, the PseudoMatter can be altered to provide an anaesthetic mist to render targets unconscious, or merely to provide a fog-like visual cover. When used to release liquid compounds, it can be used to project a jet of sticky adhesive gel to immobilise enemies, to spray fire-retardant foam, or conversely, to spray and ignite a volatile fluid into a spray of liquid fire (highly illegal under mass based ordnance laws). When used to deliver solid media, it can freeze various compounds into solid crystals, allowing them to be used as projectiles, as well as potentially carrying chemical compounds such as KO drugs, or potentially even explosives. This system is installed in place of the Cartridge system (which David cannot properly use) and helps to compensate for his lack of power through increased versatility and by taking advantage of his Savant ability to rapidly reconfigure the PseudoMatter liquid on the fly into various compounds.


So, it allows the use of the contents of the Flask mounted around the coolant stack to be turned into other compounds and then be released in various forms from the Needle-nozzle.
Originally, I was going to use separate pre-existing ampoules of compounds to achieve this (and could fall back on this if this is considered too powerful) but my drawing skills failed and I drew the one reservoir as a test, and then came up with the idea of it being a 'generic stock fluid' that could be changed magically into other forms.

The thing is, this allows an otherwise totally non ranged support character to actively duplicate the effects of other mages by using a limited supply of Generic stock Pseudomatter to achieve various effects. It can achieve the effects of a bind by using adhesive gel to glue enemies in place. It can allow the use of projectile attacks by launching frozen crystals (40k needle Sniper rifle, anyone?). It can create instant cover or KO large numbers of enemies by using Gas effects.

Now, If I get this off the ground, I'll then have to come up with some limitations for it. The first and most obvious is the size of the reservoir - I imagine it to be able to hold no more than a pint or two at most, given the size of it, maybe settle on one liter of Stock fluid to work with before it has to be replaced ( if there is any more handy, of course...)

then there's the list of what it can be transmuted into; I'll assume it can only be altered into known pre-devised forms, and so by listing those forms, I hopefully prevent any miraculous battlefield chemistry experiments...although trying such and having it blow up his face is not necessarily impossible...

tentative list of compounds available: (name/type/effect)

Anaesthetic: Gas/liquid/solid: renders subject insensible/unconscious. Can be introduced by either gaseous mist (can be resisted via environmental barriers/protective suits), liquid (requires piercing melee strike) or solid crystal (requires penetrating hit; can be used at range)

Fog Gas: Gaseous: creates obscuring cloud of fog like gas that prevents sight through cloud and provides concealment.

Adhesive Gel: Liquid: simulates bind effect by trapping subject in contact, preventing movement. can be sprayed onto an area and left as surface effect. Can be used as improvised hand/footholds

Freeze compound: Liquid/solid: can be sprayed onto surface and frozen in situ to reduce friction to near zero, making locomotion extremely difficult. Also can be used to make easy method of pushing heavy packages along reduced friction path or temporarily reducing friction in mechanisms

Fire retardant foam: Liquid: douses fires

Flame liquid: Liquid: accelerant allows otherwise non-flammable target to be set alight. Can be ignited as leaves Needle for Flamethrower spray.

Explosive complex: Gaseous/Liquid/Solid: compound that reacts explosively under certain stimuli. Can be used gaseuously to form Fuel/air explosive affect, in liquid form to apply to structural supports for demolitions, or as solid for use as long range explosive projectile. Highly useful for Demolition work, Highly frowned on for use as weapon.


Cake Frosting: Liquid: Used to decorate Giant Birthday cake for Vivio.


those are my current ideas for now. any further ideas or criticism/comments on how to balance this would be very much appreciated.

Thanks.

[Wild Goose]

You forgot Honey and Chocolate Sauce, used for engaging in "this" and "that" with significant others.

Looks good at first, but I'll relook it over again.

...mind you I've never liked needles, so a giant hypodermic needle sends tingles up and down my spine.

[AdmiralTigerclaw]

You think you're getting chills? Just imagine the looks on Freid and Voltair's faces when that thing comes out.

CARO: Voltair... time for your annual-

*Voltair turns and runs, going Godzilla on Cranagan as he smashes his way through hundreds of office buildings to get away.*

CARO: -checkup. REALLY! He's such a baby ... You too Erior.

ERIO: @_@ Shamal poke me with needle no more... I be good boy now.

CARO: *Waves hand in front of Erio's face.* Hell-OOOooo? What did she do to him?

SIGNUM: Tetanus shot. One of our training fights got a little... out of hand.

CARO: *Shudder*

[arkhangelsk]

[QUOTE=stormturmoil;1975685]Hi all. Another of my infrequent visits, this time for a technical/power-level appraisal of something new I've come up with...

I was re-drawing my Character's Device (again), and came upon a new idea, which I drew out, then considered the implications of. I then came up with a quick run-down of what it would then allow.

Spoiler for Work safe; put pictures in spoiler tages:

picture:

Yes, it's a giant sized HypoDermic needle, which fits somewhat with my character's medical background. Now, since I wanted this thing to have a purpose outside of giving Fried and Voltaire their yearly shots, I came up with a new system to make use of the shape and characteristics of the design, and then added a few bits to the picture to fit in.

Before we get any further, can you tell me how your character is supposed to hold this thing?

And how is the system pressurized, so as to be able to shoot those solids you've specified for it? Yes, I understand it is magically powered, but is it kind of like a piston motion, or more like an explosive. Such things matter because it'll change the speed of the projectile (and thus, its range and armor piercing capability).

Anaesthetic: Gas/liquid/solid: renders subject insensible/unconscious. Can be introduced by either gaseous mist (can be resisted via environmental barriers/protective suits), liquid (requires piercing melee strike) or solid crystal (requires penetrating hit; can be used at range)

The gaseous mist is only good against civilians, or in a surprise attack. When correctly adjusted, the BJ seems to be an adequate chemical suit. Can you explain to me why I might want to use the liquid mode when I can shoot him with this solid crystal? How far can that solid crystal fly?

Freeze compound: Liquid/solid: can be sprayed onto surface and frozen in situ to reduce friction to near zero, making locomotion extremely difficult. Also can be used to make easy method of pushing heavy packages along reduced friction path or temporarily reducing friction in mechanisms

A problem. The surface had better be quite smooth to begin with (say an office floor). The smoothness you imply suggests a fluid of low viscosity, otherwise, it won't spread smoothly when sprayed and you won't have your low friction surface.

However, on a surface like asphalt, your low viscosity fluid will go through all the pits in the ground, and so you'll have to spray it on THICK. With only a liter to go through, you'll run out of that stuff quite quickly.

Explosive complex: Gaseous/Liquid/Solid: compound that reacts explosively under certain stimuli. Can be used gaseuously to form Fuel/air explosive affect, in liquid form to apply to structural supports for demolitions, or as solid for use as long range explosive projectile. Highly useful for Demolition work, Highly frowned on for use as weapon.

Actually, since it is pseudomatter, it is likely to pass.

[stormturmoil]

Originally Posted by arkhangelsk

Before we get any further, can you tell me how your character is supposed to hold this thing?

still working on it; the pic is WIP. The hazard taped areas are the actual grips, but as you see, it's not well set up, particularly for shooting style attacks. I'm still working on adding a pistol style grip for that.

latest incarnation:

Spoiler for picture:

Originally Posted by arkhangelsk

And how is the system pressurized, so as to be able to shoot those solids you've specified for it? Yes, I understand it is magically powered, but is it kind of like a piston motion, or more like an explosive. Such things matter because it'll change the speed of the projectile (and thus, its range and armor piercing capability).

Not sure yet. Explosive seems likeliest.
Possibly using the steam-like clouds we see other devices like Raging Heart venting; in this case, instead of venting it after powerful spells, store it (except in emergency cases) and use it as a pressurised propellant?

Originally Posted by arkhangelsk

The gaseous mist is only good against civilians, or in a surprise attack. When correctly adjusted, the BJ seems to be an adequate chemical suit. Can you explain to me why I might want to use the liquid mode when I can shoot him with this solid crystal? How far can that solid crystal fly?

Absolutely right about the Gaseous form; it's basically there for rendering groups of otherwise unprotected enemies unconscious (example, those monster types we see in A's, enemy summons that aren't immune/protected)
The solid crystal can't fly all that far in my envisaged version; it's more like an arrow or crossbow bolt than a proper bullet. it also is stopped by barriers and shields. The liquid use has the advantage that if you can get a hit on the target in melee combat with the Device, it can pierce the opponents barriers/shields etc and inflict a direct injection into the target via a wound. Also, the liquid may be volatile, in which case spraying the liquid onto a target from inside their barrier may lead to them breathing in debilitating fumes from a source that's inside their protection.

Originally Posted by arkhangelsk

A problem. The surface had better be quite smooth to begin with (say an office floor). The smoothness you imply suggests a fluid of low viscosity, otherwise, it won't spread smoothly when sprayed and you won't have your low friction surface.

However, on a surface like asphalt, your low viscosity fluid will go through all the pits in the ground, and so you'll have to spray it on THICK. With only a liter to go through, you'll run out of that stuff quite quickly.

so noted. That was more of a 'possible, but not always useful' idea I just threw out.

Originally Posted by arkhangelsk

Actually, since it is pseudomatter, it is likely to pass.

technically, yes, but that doesn't mean everyone will always be pleased with it's use, because it's a borderline case that get's off on a technicality and evokes images of mass-weapons even if it isn't one.

in line with the letter of the law? absolutely...the spirit of the law is another matter entirely...

also, it could be messy. could end up causing more damage than his pay...

[AdmiralTigerclaw]

Originally Posted by stormturmoil

still working on it; the pic is WIP. The hazard taped areas are the actual grips, but as you see, it's not well set up, particularly for shooting style attacks. I'm still working on adding a pistol style grip for that.

latest incarnation:

Spoiler for picture:

Not sure yet. Explosive seems likeliest.
Possibly using the steam-like clouds we see other devices like Raging Heart venting; in this case, instead of venting it after powerful spells, store it (except in emergency cases) and use it as a pressurised propellant?

Not a good idea for two reasons.
1 - The steam is to vent waste heat. If you're not venting it, your device is working its way to an overheat...
2 - You cannot reliably utilize the stored steam because it won't be consistent for every planned (Or unplanned) use. (Some times you may have no steam because you didn't DO anything yet, others you waited too long and steam's cooled down...)


That's about the only thing I have any thoughts about.

[Saint X]

Well, this profile is long due...

Another profile from my pending incoming OCs dossier...

Something inspired by ROD...

Spoiler for Phasing Mirror: Ms. Deep(er):

Name: Anita Makohari
Alias / Nickname: Annie
Age: 16
Gender: Female
Birthday: Sed (November) 13, MCY 0059
Hair: Tomboyish Grade short pink hair.
Eyes: Strangely, Baby Blue eyes.
Build:
Height:
Weight:
Homeworld: Ordered Space Registry No. 0001-041400, Administrated World 1, Midea.
Heritage: Second Generation of Earth Ancestry with Japanese Origins. Civil Registry dates Establishment and Naturalization of Family Name by MCY 48. (Though there are possibly more than one such Family in Ordered Space, the date of "Establishment and Naturalization of Family Name" means the date that this particular Family was fully registered, family tree logged (from originating/applying/first generation family members to already existing relatives) and verified separate from other same name families in the Civil Registry).
Magic System: Mid-Type
Magic Color: Dark Blue-green
Mage Rank: Linker Core Levels show a potential of AA, actual output indicates B, is raised to A after graduation
Threat Level: Estimated Threat Level currently at A+, will tone down/up / be retained as evaluations continue.
Personality: Outgoing and tomboyish, but with a blend of a rather well feminine side.
Affiliation: TSAB Academy Special Cadets Group A. (in Canon, theory this would have been the group that trained the 3 Aces).

Device/s: Name not yet known.

Device type: Storage Device. Takes the form of a Black Trimmed Revolver that was actually her instructor's, now re-engineered to allow magic energy discharge with Magic Cartridges aside from the non-magical ordinance that it once used.

There are no skills so far since so far, she's only able to fire off magical energy as simple shots, not yet complex spells.

Spoiler for Other Information:

Spoiler for About Mirroring:

Mirorring is the Semi-magical (since the Linker Core is involved but only to a point), ability to take the visual identity of a person in almost perfect detail, the quality and length on time dependent on the person's concentration and magical capacity to maintain the illusion. The only problem is that she cannot mimic the voice or mannerisms of the target person

Spoiler for About Phasing:

Phasing is the semi-magical ability for a person to pass thru any material, almost similar to Sei's IS but with an expanded capability to pass thru organic materials as well. Though she has an unlimited phasing-in time (time that she can spend inside the material she's phased in), she needs to wait 15-20 seconds in between phases and can only phase thru anything that she is aware of- so a sudden backstab will still injure her while she can survive the firing squad- at least on the first volley.

Spoiler for History:

Born the "princess" of the Makohari Family, since so far, she is the youngest and only girl of 3 siblings, she was well-pampered but was nonetheless tomboyish, sometimes hanging out with other boys, especially with neighbor Yami Readman, the son of a family best friend. But by some economic and monetary/financial concerns forced the Makoharis to move to another principality. It was a somewhat emotionally jarring phase that was quickly replaced by good experiences in a new place.

Her powers were discovered purely by accident. A street fight that gone bad has managed to include other passers-by, including the young Anita who was taken hostage and somehow taken to the roof deck of a nearby hotel. Police managed to neutralize the hostage taker but as a result, Anita was pushed off into a yet unfinished part of the deck fence and began to fall down towards the hotel's storage shed, which was built with concrete but had at that time, boxes, foam pads and mattresses being held for storage at the moment. They expected the worst but when then looked at the roof and the surroundings of the shed, no signs of anything, until they opened the shed, finding an injured Anita in the pile of boxes, foam and mattresses.

She managed to survive a lethal fall, and a separate investigation was made to determine how she managed to survive. After a rather short investigation, it was determined that she had the capability to pass thru objects but a magical screening resulted in a discovery of a linker core that is weak enough to be called neutral- confounding the investigators, as most of them have never heard of a magical skill being used in such a low, almost non-magical state. Nonetheless, a report was submitted to the Bureau for further checking but it was somehow left untouched due to issues.

After being released, she again lived a normal life, relishing the stories her parents told her, especially about "their adventures as spies and special agents". Well, this may have been a factor for her choice to join the Bureau as a investigations officer. Once she enlisted, the file about her was rediscovered and it was due to this oddity that she was assigned to the Special Cadets Group, a Group of Cadets with extraordinary (when compared to the rest of the Bureau Cadets) abilities, strange circumstances and unheard of manners of things- resulting in a rather strange reunion with an old friend.

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[AdmiralTigerclaw]

Well, here's MSLN Test Dummies chapter seven, scene two, now complete.... As per the transition scene, they just arrived at Cranagan and Helicoptered to RF6 HQ.

The following is six pages in Word:


“One side, make a hole, wounded coming through THANK YOU…” Roland was simply THE ball of charm as he made his way down the hall from the helipad at RF6. He’d forgotten in his time out at McGreggor, just how… undisciplined the half-civilian staff of a typical TSAB facility could be. This was made obvious when it seemed that half the support staff of RF6 were up on the floor trying to find out what exactly had put their commander, Hayate, in a wheel chair.

“YES,” Roland snapped at the staff members before they could ask. “She got hurt, and YES, she’ll be fine… Mind doing me a favor and getting out of the way?”

Roland continued to work his way forward through the shocked staff members. Half the RF6 support staff were civilian, but the people bonded like family in these facilities. So with a combination of a lacking in discipline, and genuine concern, they were somehow… all up here rather quick. Damn internal grapevines, bad news travels fast.
Hayate was right behind him, being pushed along quickly by Shamal. She was used to attention, she was used to the doting… but most of all, familiar with this kind of situation.

“I don’t think that’s necessary sir,” she tried to laugh, though that kind of hurt. “It’s not like I need to be rushed into surgery or anything.”

“I’ll satisfy myself with making sure you get some decent bed-rest for the next few days,” the General snapped, glaring at a custodian who loitered too long in his path. The young woman quickly remembered something she had to do on the first floor. “I swear, they act like they’ve never seen a GENERAL before…”

He emphasized the rank nice and loud. And that seemed to be when everyone actually noticed the rank insignia on his shoulders. Trying not to look like they were fearing for their careers, the staffers Roland hadn’t already intimidated off the floor quickly cleared the area, each remembering an equally trivial task they neglected in their duties. The hall didn’t clear out immediately, but the breakup and ‘casual’ clearing was quick none-the-less.

“Better,” Roland took a deep breath. “I guess it really does work anywhere… put the fear of inspection in them and they find something to do right quick. I’m glad I remembered that trick from Ft. Hood.”

“Hayate!”

Shari came wandering in from a side hall after noticing the commotion going on, however, just as Hayate opened her mouth to acknowledge the technician, she was beaten to the punch by Roland’s own sharp response.

“What? Did you not GET THE HINT?” he barked, raising his voice. He couldn’t really tell who had come or gone in the previous commotion, but things were becoming extremely agitating. “SCRAM!”

“It’s okay sir!” Hayate jumped in, noting the edginess in the General’s voice. “I need to talk with her anyway…”

Roland paused, looking lost for the first time that day.

“Oh. Sorry.”

“It’s okay sir,” Shari consoled the General, giving him a quick friendly salute. “I hear you’ve had a rough afternoon… Speaking of rough,” she turned to Hayate. “They weren’t kidding when they said you got put right back in a wheel chair.”

Hayate laughed a little, embarrassed.
“I’m perfectly fine,” she responded. “I just got a little careless on the ground.”

Shari tilted her head. Wheelchair, upper torso wrapped in bandages, black eye, swollen lip, plenty of bruising…

“Careless? It looks like you got into a fist-fight with Subaru and forgot you had magic.”

“It might as well had been that way,” Nanoha piped up as she approached the group from behind, Crash and the others in tow. His face obscured by the large pod he was holding. “She got ambushed by a robot.”

“There’s MORE Combat Cyborgs?!” Shari gasped. “I thought we accounted for all of them!”

“She meant it exactly as she said it,” Lynn’s voice corrected her. “Lt. Col. Yagami was attacked by an advanced form of inorganic assault android. If I had been only a second later, she might not be in that wheelchair, but in a casket.”

Shari gaped open mouthed at the group, switching back and forth from one person to the next for a moment.
“Zed, as it is named” Fate joined in. “Appears to be extremely strong, very fast, is intelligent enough to plot military strategy, and has built in AMF generating capacities.”

Lynn nodded silently with Fate’s assessment. Shari’s face fell into an almost disbelieving smile as she stared at the group.
“You guys must be trouble magnets,” she shook her head. “Just when you think things couldn’t get any more messy…”

“Well, we DID manage to get a piece of it in the exchange,” Hayate interrupted, keeping Shari from recalling any previous escalations. It worked, the technician’s eyes went from bemused, to curious in a heartbeat.
“A piece?” she asked.

Lynn stepped forward and held out a severed mechanical arm. Shari reflexively jumped back due to its lifelike nature, but then leaned in and examined it, adjusting her glasses as she did so.
“I managed to get myself a bit of souvenir from Zed when I launched my counter-attack,” Lynn informed her. “Perhaps now we can figure out who made him, and why.”

“This is INCREDIBLE,” Shari gasped, standing up straight again. “The synthetic flesh mimic material, the high tensile strength steels, the precision workmanship on the endoskeleton components look to be the highest level of professional standards. And that’s just glancing at it!” Shari turned to the group.
“This may actually be better quality work than even the cybernetic parts in Subaru’s arm when I had to repair it!”

“What’s better than my arm?”

Shari turned around, Subaru and Tia both walking quickly up the corridor she’d come from.

“Oh,” Shari turned, slightly embarrassed. “Welcome back you two.”

“We were discussing the assault android we encountered at Selene,” Nanoha informed them. “We managed to recover its arm before it escaped.”

“Looks like it did a number on you commander,” Tia commented, covering a gawk with a sideways glance. As she did so, she noticed the rank patches on Roland’s shoulders, snapped to attention, and saluted. “Sir!” Noticing her reaction, Subaru quickly followed.

“Carry on,” Roland waved it off, looking agitated.

“I’ve had worse,” Hayate continued. “This is just a scratch.”

Vita scoffed and then shut herself up.

“So you got its arm?” Subaru stepped past her teammate and examined the item in question for a second. “Nice. I guess disarmament is your specialty huh?”

Lynn didn’t even crack a smile. If anything, her frown deepened. Laughing half heatedly at her own joke, Subaru fell back.

“ERHEM…” Crash cleared his throat audibly. “Hate to break up the reunion, but…”

Everyone turned to the ignored test pilot. Crash managed to shift his hand and get a new grip on the large pod he was holding while it tried to slip out of his grip.

“This thing isn’t light,” he continued. “A little help here?”

“I got it!” Subaru chimed in, using this as an excuse to get away from Lynn’s disapproving scowl. She quickly cleared the space, and made a grab for the pod, but Crash immediately started to back away.
“I don’t think,” he began, noticing he had a significant physical size advantage on the girl. Subaru quickly closed and latched on however.
“It’s fine,” she assured him.
“Wait, you sure you can-“
“Nothing to it,” Subaru cut him off, lifting the pod. To Crash’s mild surprise, she not only deftly lifted it, but almost picked him up off the ground as well before he let go. Hefting it effortlessly, she turned to the group.
“See?” she smiled. “Easy.”
Crash openly gaped at the young lady showing strength an order of magnitude higher than his own, as he put it humbly, ‘moderately fit body’.
While he looked back and forth between Subaru and General Roland for an answer, Shari asked another question.
“So what’s that?”

“That’s the other item we collected,” Hayate nodded at the pod Subaru was handling in a manner in which Crash thought was totally insane. “The area around the power plant at Selene was covered by a blanket AMF produced by eight of those projectors. It essentially cleared the place out.”

“Wide area AMF generator?” Shari adjusted her glasses again. “Jail didn’t have anything like that at his disposal.”

“So where do you want it?” Subaru asked.

“In my lab,” Shari responded. “I’ll get started on it immediately!”

“Excellent!” Hayate smiled, quickly wheeling herself clear of Shamal. “I’d like to take a look at it myself and see what makes that thing tick.”

“Oh no you don’t,” Roland stuck his boot right in front of Hayate’s wheel, blocking her from rolling any further as Subaru quickly hauled the projector pod down the side hall Shari had originally come from, Tia keeping after her to keep her from doing anything stupid.
“You’re not going anywhere but to bed…” he continued as Hayate momentarily looked like she got caught in a mousetrap. “After the beating you took, you’d best do as the doctor prescribes.”

Hayate laughed nervously and quickly turned a begging look at Nanoha, who nodded at the General’s advice. Despite her familiarity with this scenario, Hayate knew she had about a snowflake’s chance in hell of doing anything, no matter how much she might protest. Given Nanoha’s attitude to the situation, and that Vita, Shamal, and Signum where about ten times more protective of her… best to give in.

“Okay… I guess I’m going to bed then,” she shrugged.

“Good decision,” Roland nodded, receiving equally approving nods from the other girls. After a few seconds, Shari dismissed herself and followed after Subaru. The rest of them continued down the hall towards Hayate’s room.

“How?” Crash mouthed, still confused.

Lynn stopped and looked at Crash, then down to her hand, rolling her eyes she turned to him, handing the severed cybernetic arm to him.

“They forgot this,” she stated. “Perhaps you can find out by delivering it to them.”

Crash nodded deftly as he followed after the tech going down the hall.

“Hmph…” Lynn cocked her eyebrow for just a moment.


After ferrying Hayate to her room, and the redundant comments of ‘get some rest’ from the others, the girls quickly dispersed past Roland. Lynn posted herself just outside the Lt. Colonel’s door, placing her axe, Waldron, on the floor beside her with a metal clank.


“Do you ever smile?” Roland asked. Lynn turned her gaze to the General, who’d drifted off to the side while the girls cleared away, his agitation easing slightly as Hayate got herself into a bed.

“I generally don’t smile on the job,” Lynn admonished. “My work is not something I can be ‘happy’ about in a conventional sense.”
“I find happiness can be doing your job right and calling it a good day,” the General shrugged.

“My job is strictly attack and counter-attack of high risk, high threat adversaries,” she responded. “A good day for me is where all I do is train for a bad one. If I have to be out there doing my job, it’s hardly something to be happy about.”

“Point,” Roland nodded. “My old job was like that a lot of the time. But still, it doesn’t hurt to smile, or at least smirk, when things go your way.”

Lynn considered the General’s comment, then smirked in acknowledgment. Roland’s eyebrow shot up.

“So it CAN smile… a little.”

Lynn couldn’t help but smile ever so slightly more at the cheap joke. Roland nodded as he turned to his full height, then sighed as if he were preparing to announce the end of the world, then turned his serious face to Lynn, who instantly dropped her weak smile.

“Let me talk with Yagami alone for a moment,” Roland instructed. Lynn nodded and resumed per position outside the door as the General stepped inside. After a moment, it slid shut.

“I’m sorry,” Roland immediately stated once they were alone. “I failed you.”

Hayate stared at the test base commander for several seconds.
“What are you talking about?”

Roland looked down. “I damn near chewed you out about being proactive, about being prepared and ready for anything, and when it came down to the call. I made an error, and it got you hurt.”

There was a pause…

“No!” Hayate waved it off. “No, it’s not your fault sir. You elected to let me do my job, this is a hazard of doing my job.”

“Bullshit!” Roland snapped, surprising Hayate again. “We both knew I had the authority to make any and every call I wanted, but I avoided it out of professional courtesy. I neglected to take charge of a situation when I realized we were dealing with more than just some fancy thug. When every piece of evidence was warning us all that the opposition that made their move at Selene was well prepared to take down one, if not MANY, high level mages. We continued to treat the situation as a police operation when we should have, I should have, immediately treated it like a military operation.”

Roland crossed his arms over his chest, looking sad as he’d done in his office hours earlier.
“I let idealism get in the way of years of experience in my judgement, and it almost cost you your life.”

“Sir,” Hayate shook her head. “You weren’t responsible, you know that, you expressly stated that you wanted me to do my job, not for you to do my job. You can’t possibly be blaming yourself for my own mistake.”

Roland sighed and walked over to the window. Cranagan was a sight at night.
“You’re right, but you’re wrong,” He breathed. “True, you made the mistake, you paid for the mistake. But it was my mistake not to correct your mistake before it became critical. That’s the responsibility of a commander. When you make a mistake that I know is a mistake, it is my duty to ensure that you are informed of such a mistake, and the actions to correct it. In this way, every mistake, is ultimately my fault. I was there. Thus, it was my mistake. I failed.”

“Hind sight is always twenty/twenty,” Hayate quoted the adage. “What should we have done in your opinion?”

“Exactly what I had done the moment you got blitzed,” he responded. “I dropped everyone in range on that position like an artillery strike and called in reinforcements. When that robot ducked into the building…” Roland turned to Hayate, his eyes narrow. “I should have had you all LEVEL it.”

Hayate obviously didn’t think much of that option.

“An opponent,” Roland continued. “Cunning enough for a multi layer trap, has already potentially slaughtered hundreds, armed to the teeth, and seemed to make it past not one, but TWO of your high level spells… the escalation of force was shockingly clear. I should have taken command, had your entire unit converge, and taken the robotic bastard out with enough firepower to make Hiroshima shit their pants again... No offense.”

“None taken,” Hayate blanched. “I think we came out okay for the situation, it could have been worse.”
Roland nodded.
“Yes… but we got lucky,” He stated. “I prefer to make my own luck. And I feel I have to make it up to you…”

“You really don’t have to-“ Hayate began.

“No,” Roland walked over to her bed and learned over it. Hayate had this funny impression in her mind of an overly protective father being concerned after his daughter got mugged just a few hundred feet from home. “Once I get involved, I STAY involved. That’s my commitment to my self, my friends, and my troops. From now on, wherever this investigation may take you, I can assure you that you will have the resources of the greater McGreggor Archipelago and the BEST force at your disposal, and my backing.”

Hayate couldn’t help it. She suppressed a laugh (Those hurt too much.) but smiled.

“Thank you, that’s… generous.”

Roland stuck his hand out.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way for a friend,” he intoned. Hayate hesitated at the subtle implication, but then grasped his outstretched hand. It was large, and his grip was firm, but gentle. Roland gave it a light, classical shake before she spoke up again.

“And if you have any suggestions in the future, don’t be afraid to let us know,” she stated. “I’m sure your perspective on events is something that should never be ignored,” and she let her hand drop.

“Then we’ll start with this suggestion,” Roland straightened up. “Bed Rest, for three days as per Shamal’s assessment. This is an order from a senior officer. If you so much as leave your quarters… I’ll court-martial your ass for insubordination. Are we clear?”

Hayate openly gawked at Roland.

“Lt. Colonel Yagami,” Roland raised an eyebrow. “I asked you a question.”

“Y… Yessir!” she snapped a salute. Roland returned it with equal snap.
“Good,” he said in a very ‘official’ tone, then nodded. “Get well soon, and good night.”

And with that, he was out the door in a blur of motion.

“What did…” Hayate mouthed to nobody. What just happened?
.......


Next scene will be The Lab.


EDIT:

I hereby claim this page in the name of- OH SHI-