Nanoha FanFiction Discussion

[Gillian]

Originally Posted by krisslanza

Well more then likely. Tomorrow is my last day to get internet that I can upload documents on and I doubt I can finish it in one night... Gomen nesai ><; I'm just so lazy and forget to do it... And tons of other projects I have to do... @_@

EDIT:
Post 600 claim? ;P

gratulation^^


and finish in one night is a bad idea, then the fic will loose quality
so there is nothing to apologise
I can wait some more time

edit: PAGE CLAIM lalalala count 2 :>

[Evangelion Xgouki]

Originally Posted by Satashi

Challenge to everyone here.

If you are a fanfic writer, I challenge to you do a 500 word minimal, 1,000 word maximal fanfic about anthing. Examples:

(character) x (character)'s first kiss
(character) x (character) asking on a date
(character) x (character) in any moment (romantic, normal, or agruing. anything)

If you are not a fanfic writer, then challenge is 250 word minimal, 500 word maximal story on anything at all as well.

If you do said challenge, then I will do a request from you as well about anything. Lemon, romance, action, argument, kissing, feeling, petting, loving, anything.

Your challenge has been...accepted.

Spoiler for Letting go:

Panic.

That would probably be the best way describe the jumble of emotions she was feeling now. Even with all of the planning and contingencies they had made in preparation for this, it still seemed like there was something…wrong. As much as she tried to hide it, she could tell that Fate was just as jumpy as she was. There was a saying that no matter how much you planned, something was bound to go wrong.

They had used their contacts to make sure everything would be prefect. Even Hayate used her own contacts to set up the very best help to aid them in their endeavor, for which they were very grateful. She didn’t, she wouldn’t let anything go wrong today. It was all she could do for her as her superior, as her friend…as her mother.

It was hard to believe that it’s been around a decade since that day on the Cradle. That little girl who cried when ever she fell was now much older and wiser. Not surprisingly, she decided to follow in her mothers’ footsteps and enlist in the TSAB as soon as she was old enough to. Vivio had a rough time at first, not only acclimating to the basic training, but also the expectations and ridicule that she had to endure for being the daughter of two of the famous Aces of the TSAB. She could recall those times when she had tried to talk to her about it, but Vivio would refuse, saying she was alright. Her stubbornness was something that she never did grow out of. Regardless of what others did or said, she pushed through on her own abilities and strengths and was accepted into the Bureau.

Even though she didn’t want to admit it, she was worried for her little girl the entire time. She knew that the training was perfectly safe, but as a mother she was still worried for her safety. What she felt now, however, was definitely worse than the anxiety and worry she felt then. It was her little Vivio, no matter how old she was, that was involved here.

Since she had been adopted, she was able to be there for her, to protect her and make sure she was alright. This time…Vivio would be out there on her own without her mamas. And that scared her. The thought of Vivio going out there all alone was frightening. She had considered many times to accompany her daughter on this but Fate had somehow managed to talk her out of it, saying that she was more than capable of handling herself. She knew that…but she still felt like she needed to be by her side.

The digital clock on the table indicated that it was almost time. Now she was really worried. Her little girl was going to be going…there. Footsteps from the hallway caught her attention. Turning around she looked over her daughter, still amazed at how beautiful she had turned out over the years.

“Vivio, are you sure you’re ready for this? Do you have everything you need? If you run in ANY trouble, you will be sure to call me, right?”

“Mou, mama!” complained the teenage Vivio, “I’ll be fine. I’m a big girl now and I can take care of myself.”

“But…”

“Nanoha, she’ll be fine,” interjects Fate as she rounds the corner, “I’m sure Vivio will be fine. After all, she IS your daughter.”

“I know that, but still…doing to something like this...”

That got a sigh from Vivio.

“Mama! It’s only a prom!”

[Fuyu no Sora]

Originally Posted by krisslanza

Oh shoot! I forget about that!

I knew it

Originally Posted by krisslanza

I guess no one knows... But I would sweep all the dead bodies out of the Image thread from bloodloss from NSFW pictures. :P

I know!

Originally Posted by krisslanza

I haven't had to do it in so long it feels good!

Doesn't it?

Originally Posted by krisslanza

But I don't get paid enough to clean the OC thread.

Rebellion...

Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki

Your challenge has been...accepted.

Spoiler for Letting go:

Panic.

That would probably be the best way describe the jumble of emotions she was feeling now. Even with all of the planning and contingencies they had made in preparation for this, it still seemed like there was something…wrong. As much as she tried to hide it, she could tell that Fate was just as jumpy as she was. There was a saying that no matter how much you planned, something was bound to go wrong.

They had used their contacts to make sure everything would be prefect. Even Hayate used her own contacts to set up the very best help to aid them in their endeavor, for which they were very grateful. She didn’t, she wouldn’t let anything go wrong today. It was all she could do for her as her superior, as her friend…as her mother.

It was hard to believe that it’s been around a decade since that day on the Cradle. That little girl who cried when ever she fell was now much older and wiser. Not surprisingly, she decided to follow in her mothers’ footsteps and enlist in the TSAB as soon as she was old enough to. Vivio had a rough time at first, not only acclimating to the basic training, but also the expectations and ridicule that she had to endure for being the daughter of two of the famous Aces of the TSAB. She could recall those times when she had tried to talk to her about it, but Vivio would refuse, saying she was alright. Her stubbornness was something that she never did grow out of. Regardless of what others did or said, she pushed through on her own abilities and strengths and was accepted into the Bureau.

Even though she didn’t want to admit it, she was worried for her little girl the entire time. She knew that the training was perfectly safe, but as a mother she was still worried for her safety. What she felt now, however, was definitely worse than the anxiety and worry she felt then. It was her little Vivio, no matter how old she was, that was involved here.

Since she had been adopted, she was able to be there for her, to protect her and make sure she was alright. This time…Vivio would be out there on her own without her mamas. And that scared her. The thought of Vivio going out there all alone was frightening. She had considered many times to accompany her daughter on this but Fate had somehow managed to talk her out of it, saying that she was more than capable of handling herself. She knew that…but she still felt like she needed to be by her side.

The digital clock on the table indicated that it was almost time. Now she was really worried. Her little girl was going to be going…there. Footsteps from the hallway caught her attention. Turning around she looked over her daughter, still amazed at how beautiful she had turned out over the years.

“Vivio, are you sure you’re ready for this? Do you have everything you need? If you run in ANY trouble, you will be sure to call me, right?”

“Mou, mama!” complained the teenage Vivio, “I’ll be fine. I’m a big girl now and I can take care of myself.”

“But…”

“Nanoha, she’ll be fine,” interjects Fate as she rounds the corner, “I’m sure Vivio will be fine. After all, she IS your daughter.”

“I know that, but still…doing to something like this...”

That got a sigh from Vivio.

“Mama! It’s only a prom!”

Very amusing my friend Very amusing. Poor Nanoha, always looking out for her daughter, even if it's for things that shouldn't be worrisome, haha

@_@ too many smilies @_@

[USB500]

Hmm..... Sata-chan, I don't think I can take on the challenge for time being But I do have some random stuffs to share.

Spoiler for Shopping Day, part ???:

“Fate-chan!!”

The blonde woman turned around. Nanoha was giggling like a little girl as she showed her a bundle of Mid-Childan Dinars held in her hands. “What are those for?” Fate asked.

“Hehe.” Nanoha took her hands and put the money on them. “Remember the crossword puzzle we submitted last week? Well, we've won the first prize!” she exclaimed.

Fate blinked. “Okay, then what's so exciting about?”

“That's because we're going shopping today!” Nanoha answered and poked Fate's nose. “Remember what you said about buying something for Vivio yesterday? Well, I've been thinking of...” and here she timidly chuckled and leaned towards Fate as she whispered, “...buying her the fresh milk package I saw at the grocery store.”

“Nanoha-chan, if that is what you want, then why asking me?” Fate replied. “You could've gone there and buy the package yourself.

Nanoha sulked at the answer. “Mou, Fate-chan! Vivio needs to grow up like us, you know!” she grumbled and started fiddling with her fingers. “Besides, didn't you promise to take me to the town this weekend?”

Fate sighed. She was supposed to supervise an examination on that day, and she had to consider cancelling the appointment and asking Hayate to take over her place. “Okay, alright. You win, I lose. Let's go to the shopping mall together,” she sighed. “I've wanted to look for new nightgowns anyway.”

“Yaay! Fate-chan is awesome!” Nanoha cheered and seized Fate's neck.

P/S: this idea was inspired after a friend of mine SMS'ed me telling me that Carrefour had opened a branch next to his house, and I was like "what if Nanoha and Fate went to Carrefour to buy... let's say, milk?"

[Satashi]

Okay, I'm finally forced to admit it to myself: I've fallen prey to mono. worst thing is, I have to wake up at 5:30 AM tomorrow morning to finish up stuff at work that only I can do. I know I've been tired recently and not able to focus on writing SbtB (sorry! >< )but tonight it's just .....wow. I need sleep.

Well, to make this on topic, here's a short to amuse you while I crash.

Spoiler for A gentle touch:

Soft hands.

Unlike other's. Kind, gentle, caring. You could always feel the emotions when those hands touched you. Nanoha cared for everyone, everything. People knew her as the White Devil, the Top Ace, the Destroyer of Worlds. But they didn't know what I did. No one but me knew. She had a caring touch; it could sooth anyone, anything. With just a touch I knew she cared about me. With just a touch I knew she was there, by my side, like always. Others could call her anything they wanted to, but I knew the truth. Nanoha loves. She cares, she cries, she bleeds for the people who call her names. Yes, Nanoha was truly one of a kind. If only they knew what I did. If only they could understand the blue eyes that watered with worry whenever I was hurt, no matter how small. If only they knew of the soft, warm, caring hands that made me fall in love with her. But it was okay, because I knew.

And I could hold those hands in mine.

[Fuyu no Sora]

Originally Posted by Satashi

Okay, I'm finally forced to admit it to myself: I've fallen prey to mono. worst thing is, I have to wake up at 5:30 AM tomorrow morning to finish up stuff at work that only I can do. I know I've been tired recently and not able to focus on writing SbtB (sorry! >< )but tonight it's just .....wow. I need sleep.

Wow....'mono' being "Mononucleosis", right? Well, it's good you're going to sleep, but you should forget about work for a while. Doctor's orders (okay, intern's orders and not really orders since I'm not your physician but I've wanted to say that for a while )

Originally Posted by Satashi

Well, to make this on topic, here's a short to amuse you while I crash.

Spoiler for A gentle touch:

Soft hands.

Unlike other's. Kind, gentle, caring. You could always feel the emotions when those hands touched you. Nanoha cared for everyone, everything. People knew her as the White Devil, the Top Ace, the Destroyer of Worlds. But they didn't know what I did. No one but me knew. She had a caring touch; it could sooth anyone, anything. With just a touch I knew she cared about me. With just a touch I knew she was there, by my side, like always. Others could call her anything they wanted to, but I knew the truth. Nanoha loves. She cares, she cries, she bleeds for the people who call her names. Yes, Nanoha was truly one of a kind. If only they knew what I did. If only they could understand the blue eyes that watered with worry whenever I was hurt, no matter how small. If only they knew of the soft, warm, caring hands that made me fall in love with her. But it was okay, because I knew.

And I could hold those hands in mine.

Awww, that's just so cute ^^. It'd be fun if it could become a full-fledged story but you're 1) In no position to write; and 2) You've got enough on your plate with Lyrical Days and Saved by the Bell. (perhaps even Redemption and the forgotten Emerald Night?)

Hope you'll get better soon...

[USB500]

Originally Posted by Satashi

Okay, I'm finally forced to admit it to myself: I've fallen prey to mono. worst thing is, I have to wake up at 5:30 AM tomorrow morning to finish up stuff at work that only I can do. I know I've been tired recently and not able to focus on writing SbtB (sorry! >< )but tonight it's just .....wow. I need sleep.

Well, to make this on topic, here's a short to amuse you while I crash.

Spoiler for A gentle touch:

Soft hands.

Unlike other's. Kind, gentle, caring. You could always feel the emotions when those hands touched you. Nanoha cared for everyone, everything. People knew her as the White Devil, the Top Ace, the Destroyer of Worlds. But they didn't know what I did. No one but me knew. She had a caring touch; it could sooth anyone, anything. With just a touch I knew she cared about me. With just a touch I knew she was there, by my side, like always. Others could call her anything they wanted to, but I knew the truth. Nanoha loves. She cares, she cries, she bleeds for the people who call her names. Yes, Nanoha was truly one of a kind. If only they knew what I did. If only they could understand the blue eyes that watered with worry whenever I was hurt, no matter how small. If only they knew of the soft, warm, caring hands that made me fall in love with her. But it was okay, because I knew.

And I could hold those hands in mine.

Sorry to hear that, Sata-chan. Believe in yourself! *cheers*

Well, I do want this to happen, but I doubt it will ever become a full-fledge story considering the situation you're facing. So I guess this can wait, right??

Now I need to think of why would Nanoha and Fate pain themselves buying milk for Vivio when they already- okay, enough with my dirty fantasies.

[SpaceBrotha]

Originally Posted by Satashi

Okay, I'm finally forced to admit it to myself: I've fallen prey to mono. worst thing is, I have to wake up at 5:30 AM tomorrow morning to finish up stuff at work that only I can do. I know I've been tired recently and not able to focus on writing SbtB (sorry! >< )but tonight it's just .....wow. I need sleep.

Well, to make this on topic, here's a short to amuse you while I crash.

Spoiler for A gentle touch:

Soft hands.

Unlike other's. Kind, gentle, caring. You could always feel the emotions when those hands touched you. Nanoha cared for everyone, everything. People knew her as the White Devil, the Top Ace, the Destroyer of Worlds. But they didn't know what I did. No one but me knew. She had a caring touch; it could sooth anyone, anything. With just a touch I knew she cared about me. With just a touch I knew she was there, by my side, like always. Others could call her anything they wanted to, but I knew the truth. Nanoha loves. She cares, she cries, she bleeds for the people who call her names. Yes, Nanoha was truly one of a kind. If only they knew what I did. If only they could understand the blue eyes that watered with worry whenever I was hurt, no matter how small. If only they knew of the soft, warm, caring hands that made me fall in love with her. But it was okay, because I knew.

And I could hold those hands in mine.

That's just plain cute

Get sleep satashi, take some time off, sleep deprivation can become a habit as well... As i've been forced to notice, messed up my biological clock so that i've been sleeping only 5 hours a night for the last couple of weeks...
I suggest you don't, it's rather aggravating to wake up after 5 hours and not be able to get asleep again...

[Gillian]

Originally Posted by Satashi

Okay, I'm finally forced to admit it to myself: I've fallen prey to mono. worst thing is, I have to wake up at 5:30 AM tomorrow morning to finish up stuff at work that only I can do. I know I've been tired recently and not able to focus on writing SbtB (sorry! >< )but tonight it's just .....wow. I need sleep.

Well, to make this on topic, here's a short to amuse you while I crash.

Spoiler for A gentle touch:

Soft hands.

Unlike other's. Kind, gentle, caring. You could always feel the emotions when those hands touched you. Nanoha cared for everyone, everything. People knew her as the White Devil, the Top Ace, the Destroyer of Worlds. But they didn't know what I did. No one but me knew. She had a caring touch; it could sooth anyone, anything. With just a touch I knew she cared about me. With just a touch I knew she was there, by my side, like always. Others could call her anything they wanted to, but I knew the truth. Nanoha loves. She cares, she cries, she bleeds for the people who call her names. Yes, Nanoha was truly one of a kind. If only they knew what I did. If only they could understand the blue eyes that watered with worry whenever I was hurt, no matter how small. If only they knew of the soft, warm, caring hands that made me fall in love with her. But it was okay, because I knew.

And I could hold those hands in mine.

a nice and cute little story
and I can agree with the others, get some time off for yourself to sleep or anything else

Originally Posted by SpaceBrotha

That's just plain cute

Get sleep satashi, take some time off, sleep deprivation can become a habit as well... As i've been forced to notice, messed up my biological clock so that i've been sleeping only 5 hours a night for the last couple of weeks...
I suggest you don't, it's rather aggravating to wake up after 5 hours and not be able to get asleep again...

during the week I also get only 4-5 hours sleep

thx to you guys and girls

but at the weekends I sleep enough*i hope so *

[Liingo]

Originally Posted by Kourin

this has a great start... it's easy to follow, the suspense kept throughout. I like that the end part had Agito... but, some dark times ahead it seems... hope you write more soon. it was an evil place to stop and not have more to read.

Why thank you Although updates are dependent on the hammer of inspiration, as well as other considerations.... *shakes fist at the lure of the internets..*

just two very small things in the first two paragraphs
EDIT:

Spoiler:

A cluster of displays hovered in the air just over the centre line of the room. It didn’t matter that the information that they displayed was available elsewhere, just that those who were in charge of the room felt more comfortable with them there <--- repetition. could just leave out the second "of the room"

He looked up hopefully towards the centre of the room, wondering if there was any change. The figure in the centre of the room showed no sign of having heard the door. <--repetition. could use "on the bed" or something else.

no big deal, just that it's a little distracting when the same phrases/words get used too often or too close together. (just me being picky)

Ahaha, That's the type of feedback I like XD. Remind me to remember to read over my work before sticking it up.... otherwise things like that will get through... Then again, posting it up before going to bed probably wasn't the best of ideas..

Originally Posted by Ryand-Smith

Comment 1. Our Mistress. Its a nice look from the point of view of The Meisters, and the end scene gives me vibes almost like Hostel, or the propagation scene in the movie Pulp fiction. Its a well done preview for the background, and later scenes. Tell me, is Signum going to start... breaking the target?

Haven't seen pulp fiction so not quite sure what you're referring to... Thanks for the comments.

Himitsu-desu

Originally Posted by arkhangelsk

Frankly I hate this kind of setup. They leave me going WTF. Mostly I prefer the chronological style of storytelling, not the "Let's do Ep10, then jump back to Ep1" kind of storytelling.

Not your fault though - the writing is OK (my sensitivity only really allows for two reliable grades here, Pass and Fail, so for all I could tell you could have gotten a 80), so tell me when you've written Ch1, and I'll read the two together and probably enjoy it.

I get what you're saying. Like you I normally like to go from the start to finish, but considering this is a new thing for me, I figure I'd try something different.

Oh and you might want to wait a bit more.... It's going to be at least chapter 2 or 3 where it'll catch up to the prologue, depending on how long the chapters get.

Originally Posted by Satashi

@Thread: Af ew things here caught my eye, I'll read up on them ASAP

Yes, you should.... Specifically mine This applies for a number of people, including Fuyu and others..

Originally Posted by Keroko

Should I use Kha, and doom him forever? Or should I spare him a painfull death? Decisions, decisions, decisions.

DOOM HIM FOREVER!!

Originally Posted by Kha

By all means, go ahead! At least we'll know which timeline was Archer summoned from!

Yeah..... keep dreaming Kha...

Originally Posted by Satashi

but Nanoha's declaration to 'pop my sleepover cherry' made me flush even more.

Saved by the Bell IX
By: Satashi

/facepalm....

Mind, meet gutter...

Originally Posted by ghazghkull

I can die happy...XD

Yare, yare.... we had enough bodies to deal with in the other thread.. lets keep them there shall we

Originally Posted by Satashi

Well, to make this on topic, here's a short to amuse you while I crash.

Spoiler for A gentle touch:

Soft hands.

Unlike other's. Kind, gentle, caring. You could always feel the emotions when those hands touched you. Nanoha cared for everyone, everything. People knew her as the White Devil, the Top Ace, the Destroyer of Worlds. But they didn't know what I did. No one but me knew. She had a caring touch; it could sooth anyone, anything. With just a touch I knew she cared about me. With just a touch I knew she was there, by my side, like always. Others could call her anything they wanted to, but I knew the truth. Nanoha loves. She cares, she cries, she bleeds for the people who call her names. Yes, Nanoha was truly one of a kind. If only they knew what I did. If only they could understand the blue eyes that watered with worry whenever I was hurt, no matter how small. If only they knew of the soft, warm, caring hands that made me fall in love with her. But it was okay, because I knew.

And I could hold those hands in mine.

Hmm, sweet WAFFles

Good to see it's gender neutral as well, so it could be any number of people XD. Contrary to what some would believe...

No time today to work on Our Mistress, but hopefully I'll be able to get something done over the weekend for Monday.

[Satashi]

Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki

Your challenge has been...accepted.

Spoiler for Letting go:

Panic.

That would probably be the best way describe the jumble of emotions she was feeling now. Even with all of the planning and contingencies they had made in preparation for this, it still seemed like there was something…wrong. As much as she tried to hide it, she could tell that Fate was just as jumpy as she was. There was a saying that no matter how much you planned, something was bound to go wrong.

They had used their contacts to make sure everything would be prefect. Even Hayate used her own contacts to set up the very best help to aid them in their endeavor, for which they were very grateful. She didn’t, she wouldn’t let anything go wrong today. It was all she could do for her as her superior, as her friend…as her mother.

It was hard to believe that it’s been around a decade since that day on the Cradle. That little girl who cried when ever she fell was now much older and wiser. Not surprisingly, she decided to follow in her mothers’ footsteps and enlist in the TSAB as soon as she was old enough to. Vivio had a rough time at first, not only acclimating to the basic training, but also the expectations and ridicule that she had to endure for being the daughter of two of the famous Aces of the TSAB. She could recall those times when she had tried to talk to her about it, but Vivio would refuse, saying she was alright. Her stubbornness was something that she never did grow out of. Regardless of what others did or said, she pushed through on her own abilities and strengths and was accepted into the Bureau.

Even though she didn’t want to admit it, she was worried for her little girl the entire time. She knew that the training was perfectly safe, but as a mother she was still worried for her safety. What she felt now, however, was definitely worse than the anxiety and worry she felt then. It was her little Vivio, no matter how old she was, that was involved here.

Since she had been adopted, she was able to be there for her, to protect her and make sure she was alright. This time…Vivio would be out there on her own without her mamas. And that scared her. The thought of Vivio going out there all alone was frightening. She had considered many times to accompany her daughter on this but Fate had somehow managed to talk her out of it, saying that she was more than capable of handling herself. She knew that…but she still felt like she needed to be by her side.

The digital clock on the table indicated that it was almost time. Now she was really worried. Her little girl was going to be going…there. Footsteps from the hallway caught her attention. Turning around she looked over her daughter, still amazed at how beautiful she had turned out over the years.

“Vivio, are you sure you’re ready for this? Do you have everything you need? If you run in ANY trouble, you will be sure to call me, right?”

“Mou, mama!” complained the teenage Vivio, “I’ll be fine. I’m a big girl now and I can take care of myself.”

“But…”

“Nanoha, she’ll be fine,” interjects Fate as she rounds the corner, “I’m sure Vivio will be fine. After all, she IS your daughter.”

“I know that, but still…doing to something like this...”

That got a sigh from Vivio.

“Mama! It’s only a prom!”

Very nice ^^ That really sounds like something Nanoha would do. I'll counter this one sometime, don't have any ideas yet. You want anything specific?

Originally Posted by USB500

Hmm..... Sata-chan, I don't think I can take on the challenge for time being But I do have some random stuffs to share.

Spoiler for Shopping Day, part ???:

“Fate-chan!!”

The blonde woman turned around. Nanoha was giggling like a little girl as she showed her a bundle of Mid-Childan Dinars held in her hands. “What are those for?” Fate asked.

“Hehe.” Nanoha took her hands and put the money on them. “Remember the crossword puzzle we submitted last week? Well, we've won the first prize!” she exclaimed.

Fate blinked. “Okay, then what's so exciting about?”

“That's because we're going shopping today!” Nanoha answered and poked Fate's nose. “Remember what you said about buying something for Vivio yesterday? Well, I've been thinking of...” and here she timidly chuckled and leaned towards Fate as she whispered, “...buying her the fresh milk package I saw at the grocery store.”

“Nanoha-chan, if that is what you want, then why asking me?” Fate replied. “You could've gone there and buy the package yourself.

Nanoha sulked at the answer. “Mou, Fate-chan! Vivio needs to grow up like us, you know!” she grumbled and started fiddling with her fingers. “Besides, didn't you promise to take me to the town this weekend?”

Fate sighed. She was supposed to supervise an examination on that day, and she had to consider cancelling the appointment and asking Hayate to take over her place. “Okay, alright. You win, I lose. Let's go to the shopping mall together,” she sighed. “I've wanted to look for new nightgowns anyway.”

“Yaay! Fate-chan is awesome!” Nanoha cheered and seized Fate's neck.

P/S: this idea was inspired after a friend of mine SMS'ed me telling me that Carrefour had opened a branch next to his house, and I was like "what if Nanoha and Fate went to Carrefour to buy... let's say, milk?"

Now I need to think of why would Nanoha and Fate pain themselves buying milk for Vivio when they already- okay, enough with my dirty fantasies.

Spoiler for USB's fantasy:

Nanoha looked at Shamal curiously. "So, what is it?"

The doctor smiled at her long time friend and offered the girl her shirt back. "Well, it's simple really. Hormones are created near the end of pregnancy that cause lactation."

"But I'm not pregnant."

"Well, my best guess is that during all the stress lately and the fact that you are really trying to be Vivio's mother in every way...your body just reacted."

"so... what can I do? Isn't Vivio a little too old to breast-feed?"

"Yes but if you want to, I see no reason not to. the bonding would be nice for you two. Just don't make it a habit or you'll have problems getting her back on real milk."

"So it's okay?"

Shamal smiled. "Yes, Nanoha, it is okay to want to bond with your child."

~**~

"Ahh...." Nanoha fell back onto the bed and rubbed her eyes. "this wasn't a good idea."

"I think it's cute," Fate sat down next to her lover and placed her palm on the exposed stomach. "Besides, you complain about swelling when she doesn't drink."

"It hurts," Nanoha protested. "And when she does it, she nibbles with her teeth and it makes them all sore and painful."

"Hmmm...." Fate looked down at Nanoha and smiled to herself. "I think I can fix both problems."

"How so?" Nanoha blushed when her shirt started working it's way upward. "Fate-chan? ... oh my, you're not going to -ahh!"

"...yummy."

[Gillian]

Originally Posted by Satashi

Spoiler for USB's fantasy:

Nanoha looked at Shamal curiously. "So, what is it?"

The doctor smiled at her long time friend and offered the girl her shirt back. "Well, it's simple really. Hormones are created near the end of pregnancy that cause lactation."

"But I'm not pregnant."

"Well, my best guess is that during all the stress lately and the fact that you are really trying to be Vivio's mother in every way...your body just reacted."

"so... what can I do? Isn't Vivio a little too old to breast-feed?"

"Yes but if you want to, I see no reason not to. the bonding would be nice for you two. Just don't make it a habit or you'll have problems getting her back on real milk."

"So it's okay?"

Shamal smiled. "Yes, Nanoha, it is okay to want to bond with your child."

~**~

"Ahh...." Nanoha fell back onto the bed and rubbed her eyes. "this wasn't a good idea."

"I think it's cute," Fate sat down next to her lover and placed her palm on the exposed stomach. "Besides, you complain about swelling when she doesn't drink."

"It hurts," Nanoha protested. "And when she does it, she nibbles with her teeth and it makes them all sore and painful."

"Hmmm...." Fate looked down at Nanoha and smiled to herself. "I think I can fix both problems."

"How so?" Nanoha blushed when her shirt started working it's way upward. "Fate-chan? ... oh my, you're not going to -ahh!"

"...yummy."

oh, that's funny and entertaining

[SpaceBrotha]

So, with satashi taking a bit of a well earned (and needed) break from writing, i went and began reading all the other fics around...

...and since eagle just happened to be the first one in the list back on the first page, that's where i started.

I already had read some of her fics (White devil, Ode to darkness, Resplendence of ebony and Snare) before, so i had a pretty good idea of what to expect.

i'll use spoiler tags to save space, but i'll try to avoid all spoilers as much as possible.
btw, these aren't exactly reviews, more like my opinions of the stories and the authors style...

Spoiler for Ignis Fatuus:

Here's an AU, with a really capital A... after being treated to a rather grim look of something rather absurd, we get to see something else almost equally absurd... like a nice big chain made of W-T-F in capital letters...

...then again, the story was well written, the confusion clearly depicted, and some really weird mysteries presented... but i have a sinking feeling that everything will get turned upside down at some point, and not in a pleasant way...

Overall, i want to see more, thought the entire feeling of nanoha being stranded in some matrixque thing is a bit intimidating...

Spoiler for Feathers:

A magnificent take on how the Injury nanoha got affected those around her (especially fate)...

Only thing that really struck me as odd was at the beginning when amy called, at one point it suddenly turned into "Limietta" and i don't have a clue where that came from...

...there's powerful fluff at the end too, enough to make me grin cheek to cheek.

now that i think about it, there's one other thing that bothered me for a minute: Signum, she seems a bit off for some reason... though it might be for shock therapy, which is why i let it slide, but it still struck me as a bit odd for her to start throwing insults like that...

Spoiler for Stigma:

Guilt trip! Can't say that i like them in general, but this one seemed to be in the "likeable" zone... and it was

though i think fate took it just a bit too heavily, and her jumping nanoha like that seemed a bit OOC, it is forgivable because of the situation eagle ran her through...
...but i think the whole trip would have been more plausible if the cause of fates guilt trip was rage, not coincidence.

never the less, i liked it, a nice rollercoaster of emotions

Generally, the woman likes to write stories dark enough to dub her version of MGLN "Nanohaverse - Gothic", but she does this in a manner that borders genious.

The atmosphere is dark and moody, but usually with a good reason (IE killing off half the cast), and with such a dark background, every single piece of romance and humour is welcomed with open hands.

I think she keeps the characters true to the originals, but she takes the surrounding world and throws in a great deal of "if shit really did hit the fan", which requires a bit of work on her behalf as the canon rarely introduced anything quite as traumatic as eagles world does...

overall i recommend that anyone who hasn't read eagles work goes and corrects this mistake

oh, and his work is very heavily nanohaxfate centric

Edit: God bloody damned be this damned language and it's masculine/feminine words! Changed all he, his to she, her...
...that, and i really should start checking on people's genders a bit more it seems...

[Satashi]

Eagle is very good at dark plot, as well as hot and heavy N/F moments. (Fate's cleary the dom type, Nanoha being the willing sub)

I agree, HER works are awesome

[krisslanza]

Aren't you supposed to be sleeping Satashi-sama? Don't make me come over there and put you to bed myself!

I haven't read any of Eagle's works I think... I'm a Satashi-sama addict Maybe I should start reading Eagle's stuff too?

[Satashi]

Originally Posted by krisslanza

Aren't you supposed to be sleeping Satashi-sama? Don't make me come over there and put you to bed myself!

I haven't read any of Eagle's works I think... I'm a Satashi-sama addict Maybe I should start reading Eagle's stuff too?

Part of owning your own business is working when your sick as hell. Currently I'm eating lunch ( or trying to). I'll sleep when I get home >.<

More importantly, I think I have enough energy to think about SbtB and get some written today.

As for Eagle's stories. like I said they are mostly dark and pluck that string in your soul where you don't know to cry or smile. My stories "I don't know why" and "Come fly with me" were inspired/ heavily influenced by her writing.

[Gillian]

Originally Posted by SpaceBrotha

Generally, the man likes to write stories dark enough to dub his version of MGLN "Nanohaverse - Gothic", but he does this in a manner that borders genious.

The atmosphere is dark and moody, but usually with a good reason (IE killing off half the cast), and with such a dark background, every single piece of romance and humour is welcomed with open hands.

I think he keeps the characters true to the originals, but he takes the surrounding world and throws in a great deal of "if shit really did hit the fan", which requires a bit of work on his behalf as the canon rarely introduced anything quite as traumatic as eagles world does...

overall i recommend that anyone who hasn't read eagles work goes and corrects this mistake

oh, and his work is very heavily nanohaxfate centric

jopp, that are really dark stories, especially RoE
and I'm looking forward to the next chapters of Ignis Fatuus and RoE

one of the much good things is the clear pairing



@spacebrotha
when you look for other fics
do you know http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1289162/Arigatou_Sheitarou her?
there are also good fics

my favourite Fic from her is at the moment Inimical

Originally Posted by Satashi

As for Eagle's stories. like I said they are mostly dark and pluck that string in your soul where you don't know to cry or smile. My stories "I don't know why" and "Come fly with me" were inspired/ heavily influenced by her writing.

after I had read that stories(read them all in a line*should better look at the category* plus the alternative end of 6th Division Reminisce), I was very depressed and sad

[SpaceBrotha]

Originally Posted by Satashi

My stories "I don't know why" and "Come fly with me" were inspired/ heavily influenced by her writing.

And come fly with me was a very touching little thing, almost enough to make my eyes teary... (as a side note, i've yet to shed any tears to any animes... grave of the fireflies included... though it did get me teary eyed)

[Kirika-chan]

Originally Posted by Gillian

@spacebrotha
when you look for other fics
do you know http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1289162/Arigatou_Sheitarou her?
there are also good fics

my favourite Fic from her is at the moment Inimical

Yeah, I read Inimical too, it's really good ^^ (Fate in this story is simply unique)

And I read all of fic, but I prefer Satashi, Eagle, and a fews others ^^ (like Arigatou_sheitarou for exemple XD)

[Kagerou]

Got bored, made this >.>

Spoiler for MSLN Alpha Trailer, Fanfic thread exclusive!:

Nanoha: "So what now? I can't do anything, not after... well, you know."
Fate: "You shouldn't dwell on it, Nanoha-chan. You already have too much on your mind. You should... relax, ne?"
Nanoha: "I... I guess. But what will I do, now that I can't fly anymore?"

(The screen slowly comes into view, focusing on the floor of a bedroom. In the center of the screen, a familiar, broken, red sphere, blinking dimly.)

Nanoha: "...Sayonara, Raising Heart..."
Raising Heart: "Good-bye, my master."

(The music begins...)

Signum: "What is this... thing?"

(The Wolkenritter and Hayate stand atop what appears to be a curved, purple-white landscape... one that abruptly ends off to the sides.

Hayate: "I think... I think it's a starship!"
Vita: "That's ridiculous. This looking nothing like a TSAB ship..."
Shamal: "Perhaps it's from... that time, long ago?"
Hayate: "Lost Logia..."

(The scene changes to another place... a vast starfleet. At the head appears to be a giant carrier. As the camera zooms in, fighters pour out of its docking bays. Meanwhile, along the edge of wherever they are, dimensional portals open up. Beams of light shoot out of them.)

Bridge Bunny: "Sir, enemy ships on scope! Admiral, they outnumber us three to one!"

(Chrono smirks.)

Chrono: "Then it's a fair fight. All ships, this is Admiral Harlown. Fire at will! Burn their parasite hides!"

(Beams of magic energy streak across space. As one passes in front of the camera, the scene reverts back to Nanoha. She sits alone, on the edge of her bed, staring at the ground... at her Device. Her eyes are barely focused as she thinks to herself...)

Nanoha: "I'm not... worthless anymore... am I, Raising Heart?"
Raising Heart: "I do not think so."

(The screen goes black.)

Nanoha (Off-screen): "I'm tired of being like this. It's time for me to be who I am! To resume my purpose in life!"

Fate: "Nanoha, you're-"
Nanoha: "Come on, Fate-chan. It's time for us to go dancing with the angels!"

(The sound of mages nearly breaking the sound barrier opens up the next screen, which is a mix between massacre and valiant fight. All across the screen, mages on the ground and in the air fight what look like parasites, monsters from another era, another time. In the sky, fighters engage air-based units while capital ships duel with ones infested with the parasite.)

Nanoha: "Come on, everyone! The enemy is just ahead! Go!"
Chrono (VO): "My ship's taken a lot of damage! Hurry, Nanoha! Everyone!"
Hayate: "This is the White Tempest. Providing covering fire."

(On the ground, lances of light streak from space, slicing through the monsters as they surround Nanoha and someone that resembles her slightly - her "sister", Keroko. As the beams dissipate, some of the monsters break through.)

Keroko: "Nanoha! Behind you!"

(Nanoha turns, pointing her staff at the monster, but before she can fire, it's blasted out of the sky in a burst of energy. Shocked, Nanoha lowers her staff as a giant of a man, wearing green armor and wielding a rifle-shaped Device, walks up, light gleaming off his armor.)

Master Chief, Spartan 117: "Sorry I'm late. I brought back up."

(Fate lands next to the chief, both Riot Zamber out.)

Fate: "This fight's just beginning. Coming, Nanoha?" Nanoha nods. "Then, let's go. Bardiche!"
Bardiche: "Yes, sir. Arbiter Mode."

(On another battlefield, other OCs duke it out with the enemy. Vita, among them, faces down a shadowed figure, her eyes ablaze with fire.)

Vita: "You won't live to torment use any longer! Graf Eisen!" Vita charges energy and loads cartridges. "Giga..." The hammer turns into a giant drill. "Drill..." The drill multiplies in size. HAMMER!" Vita attacks.

(The scenes rapidly flash, this time to Subaru standing next to Tiana, on the back of a dropship, as they look down at the seething mass below.)

Subaru: "Wish me luck."
Tiana: "...don't die."
Subaru: "I won't!"

(Subaru grabs something off the side of the dropship and leaps off the back of it, landing on the ground with a heavy thud and blowing back some of the monsters.)

Cortana (COM): "Could you possibly make any more noise?!" Subaru lifts up the Rocket Launcher she grabbed off the dropship. "Guess so."

(Another scene, this one of the air. As monsters twist and fly about, two dragons are seen.)

Elio (on the back of Freid): "Man, this sucks. Where are the... woah...
Keroko (On the back of a red-eyed black dragon): "...holy shi-"

Tiamat: *roars*

(As the fight continues, the camera focuses on Nanoha, alone again, as she flies through the air, her eyes focused on the distant horizon.)

Nanoha: "Well... here goes... Vivio, I'm coming for you."

(She stops and aims.)

Nanoha: "I call forth all of my power, my hate, my love, my sadness and anger, my joy and happiness, for this one, final, desparate attack! I ask for nothing more, only that I rightfully keep what was mine to begin with! And you are in the way! Raising Heart! S-t-a-r-l-i-g-h-t B-r-e-a-k-e-r!"

(As she fires, the screen fades to black. The music fades.)

Hayate (V.O.): "So what do we do, now that we've lost the war."
Fate (V.O.): "...after the darkest nights, morning always comes. There's still a chance."
Hayate (V.O.): "By your word, Arbiter."
Fate (V.O.): "...let's go."

Title: Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha Alpha
She whispers the words mildly into your heart, and makes your gentle days...