The Genderbending of Haruhi Suzumiya [Spoilers Aplenty]

[Aebliss]

Minor edits to Kaisos Erranon's work...

Volume 1, chapter 7, Part 2:

Spoiler for Vol 1 Ch 7 Pt 2: The Rage of Haruki Suzumiya:

We reached the stairs leading to the school entrance. I was even sort of grateful to Taniguchi for talking to me, as the weather had sort of cooled down after my conversation with her. Must be all the hot air she uses up to express herself.

In hot weather like this, even Haruki could only lie exhausted on his desk, looking at the hills in the distance, full of melancholy.

"Kyon, I'm hot!" he whined.

Really? So am I.

"Fan me with your book."

"Instead of fanning someone else, I'd rather fan myself. I don't have enough energy early in the morning to fan you. Besides, since when am I your slave, anyway?"

Since I joined the SOS Brigade?

Haruki, unresponsive, remained lying lazily on the desk, without his usual pompous energy.

"What do you think Mitsuuru-kun should wear next?" he asked all of a sudden.

Well, after the Chippendale and the maid outfit would be... Hey, wait a minute, there's going to be another costume!?

"Should it be a catboy? Or maybe I should upgrade him to a butler? Maybe I should have him cosplay as Hard Gay…?"

Images of Asahina-senpai flashed through my mind: him blushing furiously, his small body wriggling, being forced into all sorts of costumes. He’s just so cute!

Haruki, guessing what I was thinking, scowled at me. "You look stupid," he decided, flipping his hair out of his face.

Hey, weren't you the one bringing up the subject? I guess he’s right, though, so I won’t argue with him -- out loud.

While fanning the neck of his uniform with a textbook, Haruki blurted out, "I'm so bored," his mouth perfectly like a heno-ji. He looked like a character from a manga.


------


After school, as always, I headed towards the clubroom. Haruki was on duty this week, so my walk there was free of his depressing atmosphere. As usual, I knocked first and waited for a reply before entering. Like a doll sitting on a chair, a cute maid greeted me with the brightest of smiles, like a sunflower greeting the sun. Ah, I feel so warm!

Nagato sat by the table reading a book, as cold and pure as the first snowfall of the year.

Argh, what kind of comparisons am I making?

"I'll go and make tea." Putting on his headband, Asahina-senpai went to the side of the rusty table and carefully placed the tea leaves into the teapot.

I sat in the commander's seat, watching Asahina-senpai busying himself, when I suddenly remembered the SD card in my skirt pocket.

Thinking that I’d add the picture to my collection of photos from the other day, I turned on the computer and waited for the hard disk to boot up. Once the screen appeared, I opened up the folder labelled “MITSUURU” and entered my password. As expected, the processing speed was unbelievable on the Computer Club's new model. In an instant, pictures of Asahina-senpai's maid costume images appeared on the screen.

After I made sure Asahina-senpai was busy brewing tea, I plugged the SD card into the slot on the front of the computer and transferred Taniguchi’s picture to the MITSUURU folder.

Looking at the picture of Nagato and me… if that was shown to anyone ignorant of the situation, they’d definitely think we had been doing something perverted in that classroom.

I glanced over at Nagato, and felt myself blushing. I’ve got to think about something else…

It was at that moment that I remembered what the older Asahina-senpai had said to me in the clubroom yesterday. I clicked on one of Asahina-senpai’s photos, and enlarged it again and again.

It was from the time Asahina-senpai was being forced into weird poses by Haruki. His bare chest could be just seen, and there it was, a little black mark. I highlighted that mark and enlarged it further; the image was a bit fuzzy, but sure enough, there was a star-shaped birthmark.

"So that's it." I said to myself

"Did you find something?" Before Asahina-senpai placed the teacup on the desk, I swiftly closed all the image files. I'm pretty meticulous when it comes to this stuff. By the time Asahina-senpai stood by my side, he’d find nothing on the screen.
"Huh, what's this? What's inside this "MITSUURU" folder?"

Dammit! Why did I have to go and give that folder such a stupid name?

"Why does that folder have my name? What's inside it? Let me see, c'mon! Let me see!"

I jumped out of the commander’s chair. "Aggh, um, what's inside... I wonder? I don't think there's anything. Yeah, that's it, there's nothing inside. Definitely nothing!"

"Liar!" Asahina-senpai cheerfully plopped himself down in the commander’s chair and moved the cursor towards the folder’s icon. No way, buster! I dived forward, trying to grab the mouse from him, ending up draping myself over his body.

"Asahina-senpai, can you please just let go?"

"C'mon, just a peek!" Asahina-senpai, who seemed to be enjoying himself for some reason, continued to fight with me for control of the mouse. I felt the situation was going from bad to worse.

At this moment, a hand reached from behind me and snatched up the mouse.

"What are you two doing?"

We were frozen by a voice colder than absolute zero. Haruki, standing before us, had a scary expression as though he had just witnessed his dad assaulting an innocent girl.

How long has he been here?

I slowly got off of Asahina-senpai’s back, the owner of which was still frozen in shock.

“So, Mitsuuru-kun,” Haruki said quietly. “I see you have managed to become more bold. Good. Congratulations. You’ve levelled up.”

What?

“Now get out of my chair.”

At this command, the stunned Asahina-senpai began to move. He got out of the chair, retreated slowly, and then slowly sat down at the table like an ASIMO robot whose batteries were nearly dead. His pale face looked close to tears.

Haruki made a "humph" noise, and plopped himself down in front of the computer. I managed to breathe a sigh of relief, until…

“Huh? What’s this folder?”

Not again…

“Haruki, wait, that’s…” I tried to stop him, but too late, he clicked on it.

Upon viewing the lewd photos of Asahina-senpai inside, Haruki glanced at me. “I thought these photos were deleted…?”

He continued to scroll down through the photos, eventually getting to the photos of me in the bunny outfit. He grinned.

“Heh. I guess this means you enjoyed wearing it? Maybe I should make it a rule that you should wear this in the clubroom from now on?”

“Yeah, sure, why not? Now how about you close that folder so I can—"

Too late, Haruki had seen the final image, the one that Taniguchi had snapped two days ago.

He froze. After a couple seconds, he got up out of the chair and turned towards me, looking livid. "So, you're interested in weak, bookish guys, huh?"

"What are you trying to say?" I responded, quickly and defiantly.

"You’re interested in guys who can’t lift a single arm to defend themselves?”

“I don’t see what this has to do with anything,” I said. Haruki clearly has no idea what he’s talking about.

“When was this taken?”

“Two days ago, why?”

Haruki stared at me for a few seconds. “That was when you started wearing your hair differently. Did he tell you that it looks better on you that way?” He pointed angrily at Nagato, who looked up from his book. “Because that’s—"

A sudden flash of a dark classroom, a flash of steel, and…

“Shut up, you moron!” I found myself yelling all of a sudden. I'd never felt this angry. Once more, the realization how close I'd been to death washed over me. If not for Nagato ... And now this guy ... Talking crap!

Haruki looked at the ground. “So that’s how it is, huh….” His head snapped back up to face me, looking angrier than ever. “Listen, you’re forbidden from doing anything like that ever again! This is your chief ordering you! I don’t want you to even so much as talk to him, understand?!”

Haruki had gone too far. “Shut up! You can’t tell me what to do!”
“Sure I can, I just—"

“Asshole! Nothing I do has anything to do with what you want, and nothing you want has any influence on what I choose to do! You got that? Nothing!!”

[How's that for an insult?]

Haruki looked more livid that I’d ever seen him, but as I said that, his body seemed to cave in on itself.

“Fine. Fine!” he yelled. “Do what you want, I’m going home!” At that, he turned on his heel, grabbed his schoolbag, and stormed out of the clubroom, slamming the door behind him.

I might have gone a bit too far myself there, but it felt entirely too good to yell at Haruki. Asahina-senpai, staring at the table, avoided looking at me. Nagato simply continued to read his book. Hey, this argument was about you, you know? Show some concern!

At that moment, the door opened.

"Did I just see Suzumiya-san run down the hallway?”

Itsuko, who had just arrived, greeted everyone with her smile. She either didn't notice, or pretended not to notice the fact my face was still glowing with anger, or that I seemed out of breath as if I'd run a marathon just now.

Since no one else was going to answer, I did. “He wasn’t feeling well. He decided to go home.”

“Are you sure?” she said. “It looked more like he had just had a fight with somebody.”

…How much does she know?

I looked up at Itsuko, whose smile hadn’t wavered, and said finally, "Wanna play Othello?"

"Sure, I haven't played in quite a while." Itsuko, who simply took my non-sequitur in stride, sat down.

As black and white fought for control of the board, (I never thought that Itsuko, who could turn into a glowing sphere, would be so lousy at board games) Asahina-senpai got up and muttered something about making tea, while Nagato, of course, continued to indulge himself with his book.

I’m confused as to why we’re still here.
That's right, that day we conducted our SOS Brigade activities peacefully. Nothing associated with aliens from a different dimension, time travelers from the future, red giants, or blue glowing spheres happened at that time. No one wanted to do anything special, nor did anyone know what he or she should have been doing. We just allowed ourselves to ride on the flow of time, living our high school life idly. Everything seemed perfectly normal.

Even though I was dissatisfied with such a normal life, I'd always tell myself, "Why think so much? You've got so much time." And then I would once again look forward to the next day.

Even with the fight today, I was quite happy. I came aimlessly to this clubroom and watched Asahina-senpai work busily like a maid, Nagato sit like a Buddha statue, Itsuko with her bright smile, and Haruki with his energy and mood swings. All these things gave off an aura of complete normality, yet all these had become part of my surprisingly satisfying high school life. Though I've had the out-of-reality experiences of a classmate trying to murder me and seeing fierce monsters appearing in a grey world, I was not certain that they were not figments of my imagination, a result of hypnotism, or even some hallucination.

I was still sort of pissed at Haruki for trying to boss me around, but from a deeper perspective, it was only because of him that I could hang out peacefully with such interesting people. Putting aside the question of "Why me?” maybe someday there'd be other normal humans like me who wanted to join this club.

Still…

Judging by what Itsuko said yesterday… any time that Haruki gets frustrated or depressed, that grey world with the giants appears. So that means that, after today…

Forget it. I’m not his mother. This isn’t my problem. He just needs to grow up, is what I told myself as I continued to wipe my forehead. I got entirely too worked up about what he said.

In this world, there’s only one person who can control Suzumiya Haruki.

And that someone is Suzumiya Haruki himself.

[Aebliss]

Edit, edit, editing Shaoron ...

Spoiler for Disappearance Chapter 2 Part 1: Interview with the Otaku:

The day of December 18 finally ended as reluctantly as if it were stuck in a bottle of glue, and the next day began.

December 19.

From today onwards we would be having shortened lessons. The lessons should originally have been shortened much earlier, but a while ago our school had been outrun by our rival public school in the aggregated results of the national mock exam. Our principal was spewing fire and instilled forceful changes with the theme of enhancing academic performance. History is repeating itself again.

There was nothing but change around me, in North High and around the SOS Brigade. As if caught up in a certain someone's arbitrary scheme, I went to school, only to find more absentees from Class 1-5. Taniguchi was nowhere to be found, probably finally reaching 40 degrees Celsius.

And today Asakura was still sitting behind me instead of Haruki.

"Good morning. Are you awake today? It would be good if that's the case."

"We'll see."

I put my bag on my table with a poker face. Asakura propped up his chin with his hands.

"But just having your eyes open doesn't necessarily mean that you are awake. Having a firm grip on the situation before your eyes would be the first step to understanding. How are you doing? Are you grasping the situation well?"

"Asakura."

I leaned forward and shot a sparkling gaze at Asakura Ryou's finely chiseled features.

"Tell me once more: Do you really not remember or are you just playing dumb? Didn't you try to kill me before?"

Asakura's face frowned and glared at me, with the exact same eyes one might use to look at a patient.

"...Seems like you are still not awake. Here is my advice: Go see a doctor soon! Go before it is too late!"

He shut his lips from then on, ignoring me as he struck up a conversation with a neighboring girl.

I turned to face forward, crossed my arms, and stared straight into thin air.



Let's put it this way.

Let's say somewhere there is a very very unfortunate person. This person has been spectacularly unfortunate, whether viewed subjectively or objectively. This person is in nature the personification of misfortune, and even the elderly Prince Siddhartha, who had mastered the deepest meaning of enlightenment, would have turned his eyes away from this person. One day, he (this person may be a she, but I will just assume it is a he to skip the trouble) drifts into slumber while tormented by his usual misfortune, and the next day when he wakes up, the world has turned completely upside-down. It has become a world marvelous beyond words, indescribable even by the word "Utopia." In this world, his misfortune has been completely swept away, and his body and spirit are filled from head to toe with fortune in every aspect. No misfortune will fall onto his shoulders, and he must have been taken by somebody from Hell to Heaven in a single night.

Of course, the person's own will does not play a role here. He is taken away by somebody he does not know, and that somebody's real identity and intentions are completely unknown. It is unknown why that somebody does this to the person. Probably only Heaven knows.

So, in this case, should the person be happy? By changing the world, the person's misfortune is completely gone. However, this world is a little different from his original world, and the biggest mystery remains as to what the reasoning is behind such changes.

In this case, using the best evaluation criteria available, to whom should the person express his gratitude?

With that said, this person is not me. The situation is way too different.

Well... This analogy is bad for my case, I guess. I was not exactly reaching the bottom of misfortune all the time till yesterday, and presently I am not exactly the most fortunate among all people.

However, disregarding the problem of extent, the analogy is close, if not exact in illustrating the point. My nerves had been practically rattled by the strange happenings around Haruki all the time, and now such madness has nothing to do with me at all.
However--

Here, there is no Haruki, there is no Koizumi, Nagato and Asahina are normal humans, and the existence of the SOS Brigade has been completely erased. No aliens, no time travelers, no ESP. Above all, cats don't speak. It is just a normal, normal world.

So how is that?

Which world is more suited to me? Which world will delight me? The world that was, until now? Or the world now?

Am I happy now?



After school, my feet were auto-piloted towards the Literature Club Room out of habit. It is a typical reflex action -- the body moves without the brain thinking when the action is repeated every day. It is the same as the sequence during bathing. There is no predetermined sequence of how to scrub the body in a bath, but from some time onwards the same sequence is performed mechanically every single time.

Every day when classes finish, I head towards the SOS Brigade, drink tea prepared by Asahina-san, and play games with Koizumi while listening to Haruki's insane speeches. It may be a bad habit, but I find it hard to kick, even if I am told to, exactly because it is a bad habit.

Therefore today the ambiance is a little different.

"What shall I do with this?"

I stared at the blank application form as I was walking. Nagato gave this to me yesterday, probably implicitly encouraging me to join the Literature Club. But I don't understand; why did he invite me? Because the Literature Club has no other members and is to be disbanded? But it was courageous for him to recruit me, who literally appeared from nowhere and attacked him. Probably even in this wrong world, only Nagato never changes his somehow peculiar logic.

"Agh!"

When walking towards the club rooms block, I passed the Asahina-Tsuruya couple. Asahina-san literally recoiled upon seeing me and clung to Tsuruya-san, hiding behind him. Tsuruya, however, grinned and winked at me. Pained equally by the adorable senior's reaction upon seeing me and what the sparkle in the taller senpai's eye seemed to suggest, I briskly gave a light bow and trotted off. Oh please, let the common days come back, so I can enjoy my honeydew once more!

I knocked this time and heard a faint response. Only then did I open the door.

Nagato ran his eyes across my facial epidermis and returned them to the book in his hands. His movement to push back his spectacles appeared to be his greeting.

“Oh! You're... here again.”

"Is it all right for me to come back? Or am I intruding too much?"

“It's okay. Don't worry. It's just me here anyway.”

He goes back to reading, hiding his face behind the thick book he's reading and would occasionally peek at me.

I put my bag down and darted my eyes around for the next thing I should do. However, in this nondescript room, there weren't many small gadgets I could fiddle with. So without choice my eyes landed on the bookshelf.

All of the shelves were jammed to the brim with books of all sizes. There were more hardcovers than paperbacks or novels, which was probably an indication of Nagato's preference for heavy reading.

Silence.

I should have already been accustomed to Nagato's silence, but today in this room it was quite painful. I would be on the edge of my seat if I did not say anything.

"Are all of these books yours?"

"Err... Some were here before I came."

Nagato showed me the cover of the hardcover he was holding.

"This is borrowed. From the public library."

On the book was a barcode sticker that showed it was the public library's property. Fluorescent light reflected off the laminated cover, and Nagato's spectacles shone for a second.

End of conversation. Nagato returned to his silent reading challenge against the thick book and would occasionally peek at me. I, on the other hand, felt like a fish out of water, bereft of purpose. I could only flop about, metaphorically speaking.

The silence was unbearably choking. I searched for a random conversation thread and threw out random words.

"Do you write your own essays?"

Nagato was surprissed. He put down his book and scratched the back of his head.

"Umm... I tried, but they weren't that good."

He looked embarrassed. I just wasn't sure if it was because of his badly written stories or because he wasn't sure how to talk with a girl. Maybe that is why he needed to do something before letting me use the computer. I developed an irresistible urge to read the story Nagato wrote. What would he have written? Probably sci-fi. It wouldn't be a love story, would it? Wait maybe it's... no, wait. Why am I even on that line of thinking?!

"..."

It was hard to get into a conversation with Nagato in the first place. Though it was difficult to find a topic to talk about with this Nagato, he does speak more than the Nagato I knew.

I restarted my silent survey of the bookshelf.

Somehow my eyes stopped on the spine of a book.

It was a familiar title. The time when the SOS Brigade sprouted, Nagato lent me this first volume of a long foreign sci-fi series, a book with a scary amount of words. Now that I mention it, Nagato was still a bespectacled boy then, and he pushed this book onto me without allowing any excuses. "Take this," he threw those words behind him and left briskly. It took me two weeks to read the whole thing. It felt to me like that had been years ago, now. Too many things had happened in the meantime.

Strange nostalgic sentiments grew, and I took the hardcover from the bookshelf. I was not standing and reading in a bookstore, so I was not really putting any effort into reading. I randomly flipped over the pages and was about to put the book back in its original position when a small rectangular piece of paper dropped beside my feet.

"Hmmm?"

I picked it up. It was a bookmark with flowery drawings. It looked like one of those bookmarks that bookstores would throw in without asking -- bookmark?

It was as if the world began to spin around me. Ah... At that time... I opened this book in my bedroom... Found the same bookmark... Then I dashed off on my bike... I could recite the phrase from the back of my head.

Seven o'clock tonight, waiting for you at the park outside the station.

Holding my breath, I rotated my shaking hands -- and I saw.




"Program Run Condition: Collect the keys. Deadline: Two Days Later."




The sentence, as if it were a message from some time ago, was written in computer-font-like neat characters on the bookmark that fell out of the hardcover.

At once, I turned and hurried to the front of Nagato's table in three steps. Fixing my gaze on his widening black pupils, I asked, "Did you write this?"

“Gah!”

Nagato screamed as he fell of his chair. My surprise dash and question caught him off guard. I should be more careful about such things, but that's not the point right now.

“Did you write this?” I asked again.

"It.... it... it... it's similar to my writing. Bu-bu-bu-bu... but... I don't know. I do not remember writing that."

"... I see.”

I then realized I had cornered Nagato again, this time on the floor. I took a few steps back and helped him stand up.

“Well, it's alright. I would be troubled if you knew. There is something bothering me, you see. Oh well, never mind my babbling..."

Babbling lines of excuses, I felt like my mind had flown somewhere else.

Nagato.

So this is a message from you all right. It is just a drab and dry line of characters, but I am glad. May I treat it like a present from the Nagato I have known for so long? It's a hint how to break the current situation, right? Otherwise you would not write such a reminder-like comment, right?

Program. Condition. Keys. Deadline. Two Days Later.

...Two days later?

Today was the 19th. Should I count two days later from this exact moment onwards? Or should I count from yesterday, when the whole world started to go crazy? Worse comes to worst, the deadline would be tomorrow the 20th.

The one-shot surprise gradually cooled off like magma that oozed at a slow pace out of the Earth's crust. I don't know anything for sure, but it sounds like I have to gather some keys in order to boot some programs. But what are the keys? Where are they dropped off? How many of them are there? After collecting them all, where should I bring them in exchange for the souvenir?

Question marks hovered in swarms above my head, and finally joined into one large question mark.

If I start up this program, will the world return to normal?


Hurriedly I took books in and out of the shelves starting from the far end, and checked if there were other bookmarks sandwiched within. Bearing Nagato's astounded gaze I kept on digging, but to no avail. There were no others.

"Just this one, huh?"

Well, if one gets too greedy for too much and grabs for every souvenir one can find, the weight would in the end bring them down, back to square one. Moving at random without a fixed goal is a mere waste of both time and HP. First thing's first; get the keys. The summit was still far away, but at least I managed to spot the pointer sign.

After asking for permission, I unpacked my lunchbox and settled diagonally from Nagato. Munching my lunch, I also unpacked my mind of thoughts. Nagato seemed to direct his eyes from time to time in my direction.

“Umm... is that... Hermes?”

Huh?

“The lunchbox... it has... Hermes on the cover...”

This thing? This is just some cheap knock off my dad brought from somewhere. It's not real. That company wouldn't make some lousy lunchbox made out of cheap plastic. See, the logo is only a sticker I put on it a long time ago.

“Oh.. I see.. never mind then.”

After that conversation, the rest of the lunch time passed by with silence as Nagato continued to read his book. As time ticked by, my lunchbox emptied. I was about to order some tea when I realized that Asahina-san was not with us. I was frustrated, but I continued thinking. This was the moment of truth. I could not let this hard-earned hint go to waste. Key. Key. Key. Key...

For probably two hours, I was immersed in red-hot brainstorming.

Filled gradually with disgust towards my own stupidity, I was overwhelmed by dejection.

"I don't get it at all!" I cursed myself under my breath.

The keys were too ambiguous to begin with. No way would it mean real keys for locking and unlocking, so my guess was that they were keys like keywords or key personnel. But the scope was still too large. Was it an item or a phrase? Was it mobile or immobile? I would certainly like to ask for further hints like these. I tried to picture what Nagato was thinking when he was writing on the bookmark, but I could only imagine him reading a difficult book, or giving an impressive but painfully long dictum -- just the Nagato that I had known all along.

With a sudden interest I turned my head in a diagonal direction, and there was the motionless Nagato, as if he was taking a snooze. Probably it was just me, but he seemed to be staying on the same page without progress. However, as counter-evidence that he was not taking an afternoon nap, his cheeks began to get a brush of red as he stole glances at my absent-minded gaze. This Nagato the Literature Club member was either terribly shy in nature, or unaccustomed to others' attention.

On the outside he looked exactly the same, but he kept reacting in an unfamiliar way that stimulated my interest. Deliberately, I fixed my eyes on him in observation.

"..."

Though his eyes' focus was on the pages, it was clear he was not reading a single word. Nagato would keep on peeking at me over and around his book. The faint blush on his cheeks became redder every time I looked in[/i] his direction. To tell the truth, this Nagato was quite -- no, very cute, in his own clumsy way. Though just for a moment, an idea flashed across my mind: It might not be such a bad idea to just join the Literature Club and enjoy the whole new world without Haruki.

But no. I would not throw in the towel just yet. I took out the bookmark from my pocket and gripped it without crushing it. Slipping this bookmark into this world meant that the Nagato who read with a triangular hat on still had some business with me. I had some business myself as well! I hadn't tried Haruki's handmade dishes. I hadn't burnt Asahina Santa's image on my retina. My game with Koizumi was halted on my advantage as she was busy decorating the room. I would win in the end if we continued like that, so I would lose my rightful hundred yen if I never saw her again, either.


The setting sun shone through the window, and time had come for it to hide behind the campus block as a huge orange ball. I was briefly reminded of a grey, colourless world where blue orbs had flown and zipped around. Strange, how even those memories were now faintly nostalgic ...

I grew tired fixating on my seat, and nothing beneficial would come out of my brain no matter how much harder I wrung it. I stood up and reached for my bag.

"Let's call it a day."

"What? Umm... yeah, sure..."

Nagato closed his hardcover, which he might have been reading or not, stuffed it in his bag and stood up. Was he by any chance waiting for me to say it aloud?

I grabbed my bag. He did not move an inch, as if he would forever stay still until I stepped out first.

"Hey, Nagato?"

"What?"

"You live alone, don't you?"

"...Yes."

He was probably thinking, how on Earth did she know that?

I was about to ask whether he lived with his family, but stopped short when I saw he was looking kind of sad. Memories of his room void of almost all furnishing came back to me. My first visit was seven months ago, and the cosmic telepathic talk on a scale that knew no bounds was in many ways plain scary. The second visit was Tanabata three years ago, and I was with Asahina-san. The second visit happened earlier on the timeline than the first visit, which is some accomplishment to me.

"How about keeping a cat? Cats are great! They may look flaccid all the time, but sometimes I just wonder if they can understand what I am saying. I wouldn't be surprised if there are cats that can speak. I am not joking here."

"Pets prohibited."

After the response, he grew silent for some time, fluttering his eyes in sorrow.

“Can I go?”

Nagato stared at me with a surprised face.

“Where?”

I replied: “Your home.”

Nagato suddenly dropped his bag (with the thick book inside) and hit his own foot. He jumped around in pain, hit the bookshelf behind him and ended up getting showered with multiple books. I think I should have been more subtle with my request.

I ran over to where Nagato was and helped him out of the pile. After he got his bearing back, I asked him again if I could come over.

"My home? Aren't we going a little too fast? In all sorts of ways, I mean."

This dialog seems oh-so-familiar to me for some reason, only it was reversed. We stood there in silence for a few minutes. Nagato picked up some of the books on the floor and returned them to the bookshelf. Since I indirectly caused this mess, I decided to help him out.

When we finished tidying up and were about to leave, Nagato said,

“If you really want to, you can come...”

Before I could reply, Nagato stepped out, escaping from my sight. He turned off the room lights, opened the door and disappeared into the corridor.

Of course, I followed. Nagato's room. Room 708 in a luxury apartment. I would just take a peek at the living room. I might find some new hints there.

If I found another me sleeping there, I would try to wake her with all my might at once.



On the way back from school, Nagato and I didn't talk at all.

Nagato only walked straight ahead down the slope in silence, stepping as if some strong chilling wind was beating against him. His hair was ruffled, blown about by sudden gusts of wind. Looking at the back of his head, I only continued to move my legs matter-of-factly. There were not many topics I felt right to talk about, and I sensed that I had better not ask why he agreed to let me go with him.

After walking for some time, Nagato finally halted in his tracks in front of the luxury apartment. How many times had I visited here? I had visited Nagato's room twice, Asakura's room once, and the rooftop once. Punching the password into the entrance's keylock, Nagato unlocked the doors and stepped into the lobby without even looking back.

He was even silent in the elevator, though a bit restless. At the eighth room on the seventh floor he inserted the key into the door and opened it, but even then he only invited me in with a gesture.

I walked in without a word. The room's arrangement was not different from my memory's impression. It was just one nondescript room. There was no other furnishing in the living room except a kotatsu. As usual, there were not even any curtains.

And then there was the guest room. It should be the room separated by a slide door.

"May I take a look in this room?"

I asked Nagato, who came out of the kitchen with a Japanese tea set. Nagato blinked slowly.

"Go ahead."

"Sorry for intruding."

The slide door slid open, as if there were bearings attached to it.

"..."

There were only tatami mats inside.

Well, I should have guessed. There was no way I could have traveled to the past so many times.

I slid the door back to its original position, and showed my open hands to Nagato, who was watching over me. The gesture must have meant nothing to him. However, without a word, Nagato put two teacups on the kotatsu table, sat up straight with his legs tucked under him, and started to pour tea.

I sat opposite to him knelt next to the table, the same position I sat in when I visited him for the first time. I had meaninglessly drunk several cups of tea prepared by Nagato, and then listened to that monologue about the universe. It had been a season of fresh greens and extreme heat, a completely different dimension from the current coldness. Even my heart was more chilled now.

Drinking tea face-to-face in silence, Nagato's eyes lowered behind his spectacles.

For some reason Nagato was hesitating. It seems to me that he wanted to say something, but kept on stuttering and ended up not saying anything. He repeated this a couple of times. Finally, he put his teacup aside and forced himself to talk properly with great effort.

"I met you before."

As if in addition,

"Outside school."

Where?

"Do you remember?"

What?

"Library."

Upon hearing this word, the gear at the back of my brain squeaked into action. The memory in the library with Nagato popped up. It was the inaugural first Search for the Mysterious.

"This May,"

Nagato lowered his eyes again,

"You helped me make a library card."

My psyche was electrocuted by a bolt, and failed to function.

...Yes. Otherwise you would have been stuck in front of the bookshelves! Haruki's summoning came like prank calls, and there was no other way to bring us back to the gathering point quickly...

"You..."

However, as Nagato continued to explain, I found his description of the situation different from my impression. Here was Nagato's explanation using his stuttering voice:

Around mid-May Nagato visited the city library for the first time, but he did not know how to create a library card. It would have been fine if he had asked one of the librarians, but the few librarians were all busy. Moreover, as a klutz who caused a minor inconvenience to the other patrons, Nagato could not bring up his courage to b]for fear of what the librarians might say, so he started to wander around the counter in vain. Probably unable to stand watching him like that, a high school girl who passed by volunteered all the procedures in his place.

"That was you."

Nagato turned his face towards me, and our eyes met for half a second, before he dropped his eyes again on the kotatsu.

"..."

The dot-dot-dot was shared between Nagato and me. Silence returned to the void of the living room, but I could not come up with any words. That was because I could not possibly answer his question whether I could remember. My memory and his were subtly different. It was true that I created the library card for him, but I was not a passer-by; instead, I was the one who took him to the library in the first place. Giving up on the Search for the Mysterious patrol that was doomed to fail, we chose to go to the library to loiter away our time. Even if my ability to remember was as tiny as an infant sea anemone, I could never forget the image of the silent Nagato in uniform.

"..."

A very awkward silence fell in the room. It seems like Nagato was unsure what to do next as well. He was quiet restless and kept on moving in his seat. Seeing this, I was even more withdrawn from bringing up any topic, and the silence thickened.

It would be simple to just answer that I remembered. It would not be a plain lie. There were just some gaps from the truth. In this case, these gaps became the biggest issues at hand.

Why was there such a difference?

The alien I had known had gone off to somewhere else, leaving behind only a bookmark.

[Aebliss]

Editing Shaoron some more ...

Spoiler for Disappearance Chapter 2 Part 2: Here comes a new challenger:

Ding-dong!

The intercom bell broke the eternal silence. I nearly jumped in my sitting posture upon the sudden sound. Nagato's body was shocked with surprise, and turned towards the entrance.

The bell rang again. A new visitor had arrived. However, who on earth would visit Nagato's room? I could not imagine a single person except a delivery man or a bill collector.

"..."

Like a soul just detached from its body, Nagato stood up and slid towards the wall without even the sound of footsteps. He punched some keys into the intercom panel and listened to somebody's voice. Then he turned to me with a slightly troubled expression.

Nagato spoke softly over the speaker, probably uttering rejections like "But..." and "Well..."

"Wait."

Apparently Nagato was overpowered. He hovered towards the entrance and unlocked the door.

"Well, will you look who's here?!"

A boy barged in with his shoulder against the door.

"Why are you here? That's new -- Nagato-san bringing in a girl."

The guy in a North High uniform was holding a pot with both hands, and skillfully took off his shoes by pressing his toes against the door sill.

"Don't tell me you forced yourself in!"

Tell me first, why you are here in the first place? It is a surprising scene to see your face outside the classroom!

"I am like a volunteer. It is a real surprise to see you here!" The beautiful face displayed a dazzling smile.

He was the person that sat behind me. I had hoped it would be Haruki, but he was'nt sitting behind me in class anymore.

In other words, Asakura Ryou had called in.



"I probably made too much. It was so hot and heavy!"

Smiling, Asakura put the large pot on the kotatsu. If one dropped by the convenience store in this season he would be greeted by this smell as well. There was oden in the pot. Was it made by Asakura? I didn't know he could cook.

"Exactly. I share something like this, which does not take much time to prepare in large quantities, with Nagato-san from time to time. If you left him alone, he would just have some instant noodles. Those things are full of unhealthy chemicals. Could you get some plates, Nagato-san?"

Nagato went into the kitchen to prepare plates and chopsticks. Some clanging of dishes could be heard.

"So? May I ask now why you are here? I must admit I'm intrigued."

I could not find any appropriate words. I couldn't tell him I asked Nagato if I could come, but I don't know why he agreed as well. Because of the story about the library? It would be just fine to talk about that in the club room. For me, I came because I thought there might be some hints here as to what the "keys" were, but I could not just say that out loud. It would be bad to make him think I have mental problems.

I made up a random lie.

"Well... Sure. I went home along the same route with Nagato... Yeah, I am a little troubled whether I should join the Literature Club now. So I walked with him, asking for his opinion. We arrived at the apartment, but the discussion was still unfinished, so he invited me in. I was not forcing myself in."

"You, in the Literature Club? Pardon me, but I cannot see the match anywhere. Do you even read books? Or do you want to write them?"

"My trouble is whether I should be reading or writing from now on. That's all."

The pot lid had been lifted, and an appetite-inducing aroma flowed from the kotatsu outward to fill the whole room. The boiled eggs that floated and sank in the sauce had turned a great color.

Asakura-san, who sat up straight with legs folded at the left corner, threw suspicious glances at me. It might be just me, but the glances were so sharp, if they had weight, my temple would have lots of small holes. The Asakura before turned into a serial killer midway, but for this Asakura, one could discern the deep-rooted confidence behind his dignified posture. There was no doubt this oden would be far more delicious than any other on Earth. That aura put pressure on me. At this moment, I was running out of confidence in many ways. I was just wandering back and forth, nothing else.

[Editer's note: Why does this description of alt-Asakura remind me so much of Ayame Soma ...?]

Unable to take it anymore, I grabbed my bag and stood up.

"Oh, so you are not eating with us?"

Meeting Asakura's jeering tone with silence, I decided to retreat from the living room with stealthy footsteps.

"Oh."

I nearly bumped into Nagato, who was coming out of the kitchen. In Nagato's hands was a stack of small plates, with chopsticks and a tube of ground mustard on top.

"I am leaving. Sorry for intruding. See you."

I was about to walk off, when I felt someone grabbing my arm gently yet b]firmly[/b].

"... please... join us..."

Nagato was holding my arm and wouldn't let go. Even if he wasn't grabbing as tightly as Haruki would, I wouldn't able to pull myself loose from such a grip. There seemed to be a mute pleading in his eyes as he looked at me. He held me for what seemed like an eternity and then suddenly seemed to truly register the fact that he was grabbing me..

“Ah! Sorry... WAAAH!”

He suddenly let go and jumped back. As he did, he lost his grip on the plates and they fell out of his hand. He was able to grab one of them but missed the other two, which were saved by Asakura's quick reaction.

“Nagato-san, please be careful with the plates.”

“Sorry...”

Nagato looked at me for a few seconds and then looked down at the floor. He then kneeled down to pick up the chopsticks. Was it that he did not want me to leave? Was it that he felt suffocated being alone with Asakura? In any case I was fine with it, especially when I saw such a bitterly desperate Nagato.

"...Just kidding! I'm gonna eat! Oh my, I am starving! If I do not have something in my stomach right now I couldn't even survive on my way home!"

Nagato seemed pleased with this as he went back to the kitchen with the chopsticks. I missed the scene somehow. Normally there was no way I could see Nagato expressing his ideas so apparently. This moment had value in its scarcity.

Watching me hovering back to the living room, Asakura narrowed his eyes, as if he had understood it all.



I focused wholly on stuffing oden into my mouth, though I didn't eat that much. A girl's got to look out for her figure ... and I kept remembering it was Asakura who had made this food. My taste buds screamed from the delicious pleasure, but the bottom of my heart failed to recognize exactly what I was eating. Nagato's focus was on his food and he took almost three minutes just to chew and swallow his tangle (konbu). Among the three of us, only Asakura was talking cheerfully and I bounced back half-hearted answers at him from start to end.

As if we were having a bivouac outside the Gate of Hell, the meal went on for more than an hour, and my shoulders had grown very stiff.

Finally, Asakura stood up.

"Nagato-san, please put the remaining portions in another container and put it in the freezer. I will come to get the pot tomorrow, so please keep it till then."

I followed him. It was like being released from all bindings. Giving an ambiguous nod, Nagato lowered his eyes yet again as he saw us off at the door. You can look at us, you know. It's fine.

I confirmed that Asakura had left first before I whispered to Nagato.

"See you. Can I visit the club room tomorrow too? I have nowhere else to go after school."

Nagato fixed his eyes on me, a bit stunned I suppose and said “Sure.”



I don't know why, but seeing him like this, so shy and withdrawn, made my heart go out to him. I felt the urge to protect him this time. Would that be repayment for the time when the old Nagato, my Nagato, saved me? Or would it be something different? I wonder ...



During the elevator's descent I stayed on the far end of the elevator, away from Asakura. He chuckled and said,

"Hey, do you like Nagato-san?"

Like him? Ummm... no not really, but choosing between Like or Hate, I would choose the former, but I have no reason to hate him in the first place. He is my savior. Yup. Asakura, it is Nagato Yuuki who saved me from that murderous blade of yours, so how can I hate him? But you on the other hand, I want to stay as far away from as possible.

... I could not say the above. This Asakura was not that Asakura, and the same went for Nagato. In this world I seemed to be the only one that had a different perspective on things, and everybody else had turned normal. There was no SOS Brigade at all.

How did this unnecessarily handsome classmate of mine interpret my silence, my lack of response to his question? He just laughed through his nose.

"No way, I see. I've been reading too much, I guess. Your favorite type would be much more on the weird side, and Nagato-san just doesn't fit the profile."

"How do you know my favorite type?"

"I just happened to hear that from Kunikida-san. You were in the same class in junior high, right?"

That bastard, prying into my affairs based on such rubbish information. That was just Kunikida's misconception. Please ignore what she said.

"But you! If you want to date Nagato-san, you'd better be serious about it. Otherwise, I will never forgive you! Nagato-san might look otherwise, but he is emotionally fragile inside."

Why is Asakura paying so much attention to Nagato? In my original world, Asakura was Nagato's backup -- that I would understand. Well, in the end he ran berserk and was deleted though. But that was not before he almost killed me. Remembering it even in such an “alternate universe” still sends chill down my spine.

"It is a friendship fostered by living in the same apartment block. Somehow I just cannot leave him alone. Looking at him from afar, I felt as if he were in danger. And somewhere within me grew the desire to protect him, see?"

What are you? Some kind of a yaoi freak?

“What do you mean by 'yaoi freak'? Keep your fangirl fantasies to yourself!" He actually laughed when he said it, clearly not taking my insult to heart. Or maybe he just didn't take me seriously. "Nagato-san is a like a helpless little brother to me. Anyway, here's my stop.”

The door opened and Asakura left the car on the fifth floor. Room 505, I remember.

"See you tomorrow."

Asakura's smiling face was shut away behind the closing doors.

I stepped out of the apartment block, and the dark atmosphere outside was as chilling as a fresh food freezer. The north wind snatched from my body something else along with my body heat. I guess I couldn't ask Nagato to walk me back to my place like the last time.

I thought about greeting the old caretaker, but then decided not to. The caretaker station's glass windows were firmly shut, and it was dark inside. I couldn't see even a glimpse of that horrible wig poking up behind the glass, either, so she was probably asleep.

I would just like to return to bed as soon as possible. Even a dream would be fine with me. That guy could just as easily get into others' dreams subconsciously.

"You are just trouble whether you are here or not, so just get the hell out here in such a critical moment! Can't you just listen to my wish for once...?"

I whispered to the starry sky, and suddenly recognized with a shock what I had been thinking about. I would like to hit myself hard on the head for daring to think such sinister ideas.

"What on Earth..."

The murmur from my mouth turned to a puff of white vapor and dispersed into thin air.



I wanted to see that bastard Haruki.

[Cat Megex]

@Aebliss: You really should combine that all into one post and not have it as three separate ones.

[besieger]

Originally Posted by DJ_RockmanX

'Bout time. I was rather looking forward to this scene.

One more thing: Hard Gay?

It's quite popular, Danchou.

FUUUU~~~

[DJ_RockmanX]

Originally Posted by besieger

It's quite popular, Danchou.

FUUUU~~~

I know, but the shota doesn't exactly strike me as HAADO GEI material.

And I see Aebliss has been hard at work.

[Aebliss]

Continuing to edit Shaoron ... Before more people suggest putting more edits in one post, I tried to do that last time and was told I made my post too large and had to cut it down to size. Therefore, I'll be continuing like this ... 'Sides, the first edit on this page is of Kaisos Erranon's work, the latter ones are all of Shaoron's. ^^ Might be a mite confusing if I crammed all of that into the same post, or so I thought.

Spoiler for Disappearance Chapter 3 Part 1: Finding Nemo... I mean Haruki:

December 20th.

It was the morning of the third day since the world had changed as I awoke from my dreamless slumber. As usual, I got out of bed, feeling as though my stomach had been stuffed with a few dozen .300mm bullets. Shamisen, who was sleeping on the blanket, rolled off suddenly onto the ground and laid flat. I softly placed my foot on her tummy and sighed.

Sticking his head through the door, my brother looked dismayed when he saw that I had awoken.

"So, did Shami talk?"

He had been asking me this ever since the night before last. My answer was always the same.

"No~pe."

As I reminisced about the soft touch of the cat's fur on my toes, my brother had begun humming his little song as he carried Shamisen out of the room. It's great being a cat, all they ever do is eat, sleep and lick fur. How I wanted to trade places with her for a day. Who knows, as a cat, I might even find what I was looking for in no time.

That's right, I still hadn't found the key. Nor had I found out what this key meant. Not to mention the system activation program. If I didn't do something today, the world would continue to remain this way, and it might even become more terrifying. As for the time limit - whose idea was it to have such a limit anyway? Was it already a pain for Nagato to provide a limited time offer?

I headed to school without making any progress. The gloomy skies looked as though it was about to snow as the clouds loomed above everyone's heads. Seemed like we'd be getting a white Christmas this year; snow fall could be heavy. There hadn't been much forecast on the amount of snow, but judging by the frostiness of this year's winter, it'd probably be big. Haruki would probably be more excited than a puppy dog as he prepares for the winter field trip... That is, if Haruki still exists.

There was nothing worth my attention as I climbed up the slope as usual towards North High and finally arrived at the 1-5 classroom. My exhaustion manifested physically as I walked slowly, so I only just managed to sit down behind my desk in time for the first school bell to ring. Like yesterday, there were a lot of sick absentees in class, but what was amazing was that Taniguchi had only needed to rest for one day. Though she was still wearing her mask, she had still come to school. It was only now that I realized that this girl loved going to school.

By the way, today Asakura, who sat behind me, gave me a rather intriguing smile.

"Good morning."

Asakura greeted me simply like he did everyone else. I merely nodded back.

As the second bell signalled the beginning of classes, Okabe-sensei entered energetically and began the home room session in earnest.



I'd lost track of what day of the week it was already. Today's timetable seemed different from what I remembered, though I wasn't sure. I wasn't even sure whether I was having the same subjects on this day last week. Even if yesterday's and today's timetables were to be swapped, I'm afraid I would barely notice. Was it just I that had become weird? The guy known as Suzumiya Haruki never existed, Asakura was the most popular classmate, Asahina-san was the unreachable senpai, while Nagato was the sole member of the Literature Club.

Just which was the real thing? Was the SOS Brigade and everything I'd been through all a part of my imagination?

Damn, my thoughts are becoming more and more negative.

During PE in the first session, I was the absent-minded player who was not interested in defending her section of the volleyball court. As was to be expected, I got hit in the face by a spike from the opposing team. The next session was math, everything just went in my left ear and out my right; without my even realizing it, recess had arrived.

As I slumped onto my desk to cool my head down...

"Yo, Kyon,"

It was Taniguchi. She hung her mask beneath her chin and gave her usual idiotic grin.

"The next session's chemistry, today the teacher's gonna pick my row to answer questions, help me out."

Help you out? Are you nuts?! You do realize we both know each others' strengths and weaknesses inside out already, don't you? How am I supposed to know something that you wouldn't know?

"Hey, Kunikida,"

I called my other partner, who had just returned from the bathroom,

"Tell Taniguchi everything you know about sodium hydroxides. She especially wants to know whether they're on good terms with hydrochloric acids."

"Well, that's simple, they get neutralized after being mixed together,"

Kunikida said as she flicked through Taniguchi's textbook,

"Ah, so it's this question. First calculate in moles and you'll be able to convert it to kilograms. Let me think..."

Seeing a knowledgeable person explaining so casually, one feels extremely helpless.

Taniguchi nodded her head non-stop, yet as Kunikida thought further, she didn't intend to calculate on her own anymore. She grabbed my mechanical pencil from my desk and scribbled a few numbers and symbols on the blank spaces in her textbook.

After it was all settled, Taniguchi gave me a weird smile,

"Kyon, Kunikida told me everything during the volleyball match in PE, you seemed to be up to something the day before yesterday."

Weren't you at school as well that day?

"I had to take a nap in the infirmary during lunch, and I was feeling drowsy that whole afternoon. I only heard about it this morning. I hear you were in a state of frenzy, did you really say Asakura wasn't supposed to exist?"

"More or less."

I held my hand up and made a sign that read, "You can get lost now!" Yet Taniguchi smirked and continued,

"How I wish I could have been there as well. It's pretty rare to see you yelling around hilariously."

Kunikida seemed to remember something from then and said,

"Kyon's better today. That day it seemed as though she had wanted to hit Asakura-san. Did he do something to upset you?"

Even if I said it I'd be treated as a lunatic. So it was pretty natural for me to keep quiet.

"Oh yeah, you said then that someone had been replaced by Asakura. Did you find that person? His name's Haruki, right? Just who is he?"

Would you please stop reminding me about this stuff? Right now I would shiver involuntarily every time that name is mentioned, even if it's being uttered repeatedly by a parrot.

"Haruki?"

You see? Even Taniguchi has bent her head. Not only that, she even said,


"That Haruki, you don't mean Suzumiya Haruki, do you?"


Yes, that Suzumiya Haruki......

The bones in my neck made a creaking noise. I slowly turned my head up to look at the silly look my classmate was giving me,

"Taniguchi, what did you just say?"

"I said Suzumiya, the Savage Hunk of East Junior High. I've been in the same class as him for three years. A real pain if you ask me. Wonder how he's doing... And how come you even know who he is? You said he was replaced by Asakura, just what was that all about?"

My eyes went white in an instant......

"YOU! YOU WASHBOARD IDIOT!"

I yelled and leaped up at once. Perhaps intimidated by my sudden outburst, both Taniguchi and Kunikida instinctively backed up a bit. I landed on Taniguchi and forced her to the ground.

"Ouch! Hey! Who are you calling a 'washboard!?' These might not be big, but they are definitely not flat! But what about you? You're as flat as a pressed waffle!"

That's none of your business, and don't bother trying to struggle! Sitting on top of Taniguchi, I grabbed her by her collar and pulled her towards my face until both our noses nearly touched each other.

"You said you know Haruki!?"

"How can I not know him? I couldn't forget him even after fifty years. If there's anyone from East Junior High that doesn't know him, they need a check-up to see if they're suffering from amnesia!"

"Where?!"

As though chanting a mantra, I fired question after question,

"Where's that idiot? Where is Haruki right now? Tell me where!"

"Kyon, what's up with you? You're scaring me...”

“TELL ME NOW!”

“Are... are you some kind of crazy taiko drum? Did you see Suzumiya somewhere and fall in love with him at first sight? Give it up! I'm only saying this for your own good. While his looks are the stuff of a girl's dreams, his attitude is enough to shatter those dreams to oblivion. For example, he......"

Drew mysterious geometric shapes in the school's track field with white chalk, right? I knew that already.

“How... how did you know that?”

That doesn't matter right now! Stop wriggling! I'm not interested in his past criminal record, I just want to know where the hell Haruki is right now!

"He's at Kouyouen School,"

Taniguchi replied as though reciting the atomic sequence of hydrogen,

"If I'm not mistaken, he's enrolled in the high school at the bottom of the hill, just in front of the station. He's already a bright person, so it's only natural that he would study in such an elite high school."

Elite school?

"Is Kouyouen really that good? I thought they were an all boy's school for the rich and famous."

Taniguchi looked at me with pitiable eyes and said,

"Kyon, I don't know what they told you in junior high, but that school's always been co-ed. Not to mention it's one of the top schools in university entrance rate in this prefecture. To have such a school in our district really pisses me off!"

As I listened to Taniguchi's mumblings, I released my grip and Taniguchi's head fell backwards and hit the floor.

"Ouch! Watch it, I'm not a well person, damn you!"

Why did I not realize this before? I should commit seppuku for this.

Just because Haruki wasn't at North High, I assumed that he didn't exist in this world. As you can see, my imagination was worse than that of a giant cave cricket. When I return to my relatives' place in the countryside next summer, I should go and have a chat with one of its relatives sitting by the balcony, we'll probably get along very well.

"Hey! Will you get off of me now? You're heavy and everyone's looking at us!" Taniguchi tidied her collar and said, "Kunikida, you're right. She is nuts, and her condition seems to have worsened. I think she became a white eyed demon or something."

Say whatever you like, I'm not in the mood to argue with you right now, because right now there was someone who was pissing me off more than the backstabbing Taniguchi and the ever-nodding Kunikida.

This series of unfortunate events was truly unbelievable. If someone from East Junior High was sitting nearby that day, or if Taniguchi was in the classroom then, then I would have heard Haruki's name loud and clear much earlier. Just whose damn fault is it? Come on out so I can beat the crap out of that bastard! This score can be settled another day, though. Everything that needs answers has been asked, all that's left is to take action. I stood up and ran towards the door, stepping on Taniguchi's face on the way out.

"Where're you going, Kyon? The bathroom?"

I turned around while rushing towards the classroom door and said,

"I'm taking leave early."

As early as possible,

"What about your bag?"

That'll just get in the way,

"Kunikida, if Okabe asks, tell her I've got bubonic plague with dysentery, or flu, or something like that and it hurts like hell. Oh, and Taniguchi!"

I gave my sincere gratitude to my wide-jawed classmate, who was seeing me off,

"Thanks!"

"Huh? Wha......?"

I last saw Taniguchi sitting up still with swirls in her eyes, I then bolted out of the classroom, and within a minute I was out of the school gates.



It was really difficult to run down a slope at a high speed. Because I was too excited, I ran with all my strength. After about ten minutes, even my legs and lungs were beginning to complain that I was pushing them too hard, let alone my heart. Come to think of it, I could have still made it if I waited for the third session to finish. At this time of year, Kouyouen was probably having a half school-day as well. It would have been fine as long as I arrived there before their last school bell rang. Even if I were to walk from North High, it would still take me less than half an hour.

By the time I realized how poor my time management skills were, I had already arrived at the private school by the station, the finishing point of my compulsory daily climbing route to school. It was very quiet inside the school, were they still having classes? I took a look at my watch, the lessons were about the same time as our school, they're probably in the third session right now. In other words, before the school gates open, I have one whole hour of free time. Being empty-handed in this cold weather, all I could do was wait.

"Maybe I should forcefully barge in......"

If it were Haruki, he would do exactly that, and he would have handled it beautifully. Sadly I don't have that confidence. And after walking slowly towards the gate, I frantically turned around once again. Standing outside the closed school gates was a stern-faced guard. As expected from a rich private school.

Actually, I could also infiltrate the school by climbing the fence, the problem was that the top of the fence stood at quite a distance from the ground, and there was barbed wire at the top to boot, it seemed to be a better choice to wait for the school gates to open. If I were to forcefully go in, it'd be all over if I were to get caught. I've already come this far, I had no intention of letting the game end so easily. After all, unlike Haruki, I could still control myself when it was necessary.



And so, I waited for nearly two hours.

The school bell that rang for the last time sounded like a distant memory, and the opened gates poured out students like a released flood.

Taniguchi was correct, this was indeed a co-ed school. The boy's uniform was a traditional gakuran uniform. Walking amongst them were girls in black blazers. This was exactly the opposite from North High, with the girls in sailor uniform and the guys in suits. As for the gender ratio, there seemed to be more boys......

"How can this be...... Forget it."

There were a few familiar faces among the female students, they were the students from Class 1-9. And I had thought they'd all disappeared, turns out they were here in this high school all along. I don't know whether it's coincidence or what, but I had yet to see anyone from my junior high. Those that I had seen before didn't take much notice of me, and walked quickly past me after taking a quick suspicious look at me. Right now, they probably have a whole new set of memories, most likely a happier school memory, because at least they don't have to climb up the hill to school every day.

I continued to wait, and the chances of me hitting the jackpot were 50/50. If that guy had joined some club activity, or was busy planning something and had to stay in school, then I might've basically just as well become a scarecrow here. Please, just hurry up and be on your way home, and then appear before me.

What if there is an SOS Brigade in this Kouyouen School, with members other than myself taking part in all sorts of activities......

When I thought of this, my innards begun to tumble like mad. Wouldn't that make Asahina-san, Nagato, Koizumi, and me disposable trash? If that were the case, I'm even worse than a side-character, and would become a complete outsider. That's not what I want! I'll pray to just about anyone! Be it Jesus, Mohammad, Buddha, Mani, Zoroaster, or even Lovecraft! If any of them can ease my discomfort, I'll believe in any prophecy or legend that they preach. Even if it's by those doomsday cult preachers, I'll gladly follow them. Now I finally understand how it feels to be a person who would cling onto any piece of straw and still hopelessly sink down in a mud swamp.

After being consumed by anxiety and depression for about ten minutes,

"......Phew,"

I sighed deeply, not even I knew the meaning behind this sigh. Why was I making such a huge sigh of relief?


Because he had appeared.


Buried amongst a sea of suits and gakuran uniforms was a face I would never forget even until the moment I die.

Just like when he first introduced himself in the first day of school and clotted up the air inside the classroom, he had long hair which reached his waist. I looked stunned for some time, and then I began to count my fingers to figure out what day of the week it was. Today wasn't the day for him to let his hair down, looks like this Haruki wasn't interested in toying around with his hair.

As though unhappy that I was in the way, the students of Kouyouen School walked past by my left and right side. I had no idea what they thought of this girl standing like an idiot in front of their school gate, but they can think whatever they want, and I don't have time to worry about what they think anyway.

I stood still and fixed my gaze upon the guy in the suit uniform that was slowly approaching.

Suzumiya Haruki.

I've finally found you.




I involuntarily smiled, this was because it wasn't just Haruki that I've found.

Walking beside Haruki and chatting with him was a girl in a black blazer. Carrying a smile that I can never stand watching was none other than Koizumi Itsuko. Now that's a surprise addition.

So these two have now gotten so close that they're now going home together after school. Yet Haruki doesn't seem to be quite happy, his expression has remained as when I first saw him at the beginning of the school term. He would occasionally give a quick reply, and then turned his gaze back to the tarmac with a scowl on his face.

It's the guy from before. Before he even thought of creating the SOS Brigade, everywhere he went in school, he carried the expression of a martial arts master who was desperate to find a worthy opponent in order to showcase his abilities. That expression brought a sense of nostalgia for me. That was the Haruki who was bored with the mediocrity of everyday life, and working hard to find some excitement, yet never realizing he could manifest anything he desires.

Anyway, there can always be time for reminiscing, but not now. The two of them did not seem to notice me as they slowly approached me.

As hopeless as it may sound, already I could not stop my heart from beating quickly. If I were to see a doctor now, the two-beat rhythm coming from within would be so loud that he would have to take his stethoscope off. The weather was freezing and yet I was sweating. I only hope that my trembling legs are just a part of my imagination, I was sure I'm not that cowardly.

......They're here. Haruki and Koizumi have now arrived before me.

"Hey!"

It took me a lot of effort just to get my voice out.

Haruki lifted his head and exchanged glances with me.

His legs then stopped walking.

"What is it?"

His gaze was as cold as a freezer's. He scanned my whole body with that gaze before moving his eyes off,

"What do you want with me? No, I should rather ask, who are you? I'm not the sort of character to let anyone say 'Hey!' to me. If you want to flirt, go somewhere else, I don't have any interest in such activities."

As I was already mentally prepared, that didn't come as too much of a shock. As expected, this Haruki didn't know me.

Koizumi stopped as well and looked at me with a cold stare. From her expression, I don't think she's even seeing me, let alone knowing who I am.

I turned and spoke to that Koizumi,

"Is this the first time we have met?"

Koizumi shrugged her shoulders lightly and said,

"I believe so. May I ask who you are?"

"Are you a transfer student in this school?"

"I was transferred here this spring...... How did you know I'm a transfer student?"

"Do you know anything about a group that calls itself the 'Organization?'"

"'Organization?' What are you implying?"

Her inoffensive smile was the trademark smile that I was familiar with. But the look in her eyes betrayed a sense of alert. Just like Asahina-san, this girl doesn't know me.

"Haruki,"

Haruki's face twitched and glared at me with his large black eyes,

"Who gave you permission to call me by my name? Just who on Earth are you? I don't remember asking for the company of perverts or stalkers. Get lost already, you're in the way."

"Suzumiya."

"You're not allowed to call me by my surname either. How did you know my name anyway? Are you from East Junior High? You must be from North High, I can tell from that uniform. Just what is a North High student doing here?"

Haruki snorted and then turned around,

"Ignore him, Koizumi-san. Just pretend she never existed. There's no need to waste time on this impolite woman, she's just an idiot anyway. Let's go!"

Why was Haruki going home with Koizumi after school? Could it be that Koizumi has taken over my role in this world? Though that thought had crossed my mind for a while, I wasn't frantically thinking of that then.

"Wait!"

I grabbed hold of Haruki's shoulder as he turned to avoid me,

"Let me go!"

Haruki turned his arm and swung my hand off. His face was now full of anger, but that level of fierceness won't be enough to let him just leave. As my hand flew away, my other hand grabbed his arm.

"You sure are annoying! Don't think that just because you're a girl I'll go easy on you."

Haruki then twisted his arm around, which made me lose my grip on him, and then pushed me back in one motion.

A pain emanated from my chest, it was so painful that I felt like I was about to suffocate, though not enough for me to crawl around on the ground. After finding my balance, I said disconsolately,

"Just tell me one thing,"

I took out my last ounce of courage. If this doesn't work, then I'm out of ideas. This was my last hope - I then threw out this question,

"Do you remember the Tanabata festival three years ago?"

Just as he was about to leave, Haruki stopped once again. Looking at that long dark hair of his, I continued,

"On that day, you sneaked into your school and drew shapes on the school field with white chalk."

"So what about it?"

Haruki turned with a furious look on his face,

"Everyone knows about that already! Why are you mentioning this for?"

I chose my words carefully, trying to finish it as quickly as possible,

"You weren't alone in sneaking into school that night. You were with an older girl who carried Asahina...... A small guy. It was with her that you drew the patterns using white chalk. The patterns were a message for Hikoboshi and Orihime, which roughly meant 'I am here......'"

I wasn't able to complete my sentence.

Haruki yanked my ponytail with his right hand and made me bow down a bit. He then lifted me up and carried me to a narrow street nearby and roughly put me down.

"Ouch!"

... You are still no kind of prince, but I'll let it slide this time.

I looked at him in protest, and his eyes looked back with ferociousness. His piercing gaze now shot right into my vision. That was a nostalgic gaze, Haruki's exasperated face was just as nostalgic as well.

He then spun me around and put me in a head lock. I was having difficulty breathing as my neck was behing held tightly by him. Such a savage guy, treating a girl like this. No, now's not the time to indulge in memories of Haruki's amazing power as he asked:

"How did you know that!? Who told you!? No, I never told anyone. That time......"

Haruki suddenly stopped, his tone then changed dramatically as he noticed my uniform,

"North High...... Could it be......!? What's your name?"

My name? Should I tell him my real name, which he has never heard of, or should I tell him that stupid nickname that everyone has gotten used to calling me?

No matter which one it was, it would have no effect on this guy before me. I don't think he has ever heard of those two names. In that case, there could only be one name that I could use:

"Jane Smith."

Though I tried to say it calmly, it's difficult when I'm being lifted up by the neck. Can't you see I'm having difficulty breathing....... Just when I was thinking of that, the strong pressure on my neck was lifted at once.

"......Jane Smith?"

Haruki finally released the choke hold and looked stunned as his hands stayed there in mid-air. I've rarely seen him like that. Suzumiya Haruki looked as though his soul has been taken by the grim reaper, as his mouth was wide open.

"So it's you...... You're that Jane Smith? The strange high school student...... Who helped me...... In East Junior High......"

Haruki suddenly tripped. His semi-long dark hair partially covered his eyes. He slumped back against a wall as Koizumi rushed to his side.

The link has now been connected.



What do mean 'helped you!?' You practically had me do everything...... But I wasn't going to waste my time arguing with him. That's it, I've finally found some clue! In this completely altered world, there was one person, and the only person, who shared the same memory as I did.

So it is you.

That person was none other than Suzumiya Haruki.

If this Haruki has seen me three years ago during Tanabata, then this world three years on could be traced back to that point in time. Not everything "disappears without a trace." The time when I travelled back to three years ago with Asahina-san, and returned to the present with the help of Nagato's power, that part of history did indeed exist. I don't know what went wrong in the process, but at least three years ago, this world was the same world as the one I had known.

Just what went wrong? Why was I the only one with the original memories?

I guess I'll think about this later on.

I looked at Haruki, whose jaw was hanging open as though he had seen one of the wonders of the world, and said to him,

"I'll explain everything. Do you have time? Because it's a long story......"



As the three of us walked shoulder to shoulder, Haruki spoke,

"I've seen Jane Smith twice. Not long after that, as I was on my way home, I heard someone shout behind me, what did she say...... Ah, yes! Something like, 'Please take good care of the Jane Smith who would shake the world!' What does that mean anyway?"

I've never said such a thing. After making sure Haruki was out of sight from the track field, I went and woke up Asahina-san and rushed towards Nagato's apartment. Could there be another Jane Smith? But just what the hell was that Jane Smith talking about?

It sounded as though she was trying to give some hint to Haruki.

"Was that Jane the same Jane you saw at East Junior High?"

"She was too far away, plus it was dark at the time. I can't remember either of their faces very well. But her voice sounded like yours, and she was wearing North High's uniform."

Things seem to be getting more and more complicated. Just when I thought I had things linked up, the details didn't fit.

“I still say Jane Smith is kind of a stupid name.”

Will you give that a rest!?



We looked for a coffee shop nearby and went inside. I had wanted to go to the usual coffee shop the SOS Brigade used for their meetings, since it was a reunion of the SOS Brigade members after all. Though it was a bit far from where we were.

"This other you that I knew studied in North High, and on the first day of school, he said the following......"

Before our orders even arrived, I began my story right away. Before the cafe au lait cooled down to the point that you could drink it all in one gulp, I had told him the compressed version of everything that has happened so far, without holding back. Things like an alien, a time traveler and an esper coming together in the SOS Brigade and our club room being the Literature Club's room.

I especially told him in detail about my time traveling adventure during Tanabata, as I thought that was the most important part.

I gave Haruki a general picture about how he was potentially a god, a time distortion, and an evolutionary possibility, as none of these theories were confirmed. I only told him that he had an incredible power hidden within, and how this unknown power could even change the world.

Just this much was enough to make this guy very interested. He constantly went into deep thought, and then finally said,

"How come you could read the alien language that I thought up? It is true that those symbols meant 'I am here, come look for me.'"

"Someone translated that for me,"

"You mean that alien?"

"To be precise, a Living Humanoid Interface created by the aliens in order to interact with humans; I remember that's how he puts it."

I told them everything about Nagato Yuuki. At first glance he seemed like an extra gift from the Literature Club to the brigade, but he's actually only set up as an expressionless quiet bookworm. I then told them about Asahina-san. The serial-cosplaying mascot, as well as our public relations officer and the brigade's exclusive tea-serving butler was actually a time traveler from the future. It was he that I traveled back with to the Tanabata three years ago, and it was thanks to Nagato that we managed to return.

"So that means that Jane would be you, right? Then I'll believe you, since nothing bad would come from that. So you were engaged in time travel then......"

Haruki looked at me with what was apparently the proper look to examine a time traveler and nodded his head like my little brother who had just received a gift.

Aren't you being a bit too trusting? I never knew you would believe someone so easily. That time when it was just the two of us looking around town for mysterious stuff, you treated my story like trash when I told you in that coffee shop.

"That other me is an idiot, but I believe you."

I wish the other you would agree with me on that note.

Haruki leaned forward and added,

"Because believing is more fun!"

I was familiar with this very bright smile which was like a hundred flowers blossoming. This was the smile Haruki had when I saw him smile for the first time. It was the million watt smile he had when he suddenly thought about setting up the SOS Brigade during English class.

"Since that day, I went and investigated everyone from North High. I even infiltrated there for some time, but I never did see anyone who resembled Jane. I was angry with myself then for not remembering her face properly. But now it makes sense, since you hadn't even been enrolled at North High three years ago......"

There were two versions of myself back then, one was me living as a carefree junior high schooler, the other one was a me frozen in time with Asahina-san inside Nagato's guest room.

I might as well bring in the ordeals of this wonder kid here:

"In that world Koizumi is an esper. You've helped me a great deal, but you've also given me a lot of trouble,"

"If that's true, then that's pretty incredible."

Drinking her tea elegantly, Koizumi said with a half-suspicious glance.

I turned once again towards Haruki,

"Why didn't you come to North High?"

"No particular reason, really. I was only interested in North High because of that incident during Tanabata. But by the time I entered high school, Jane would have graduated already, not to mention I wasn't able to find her before. Besides, Kouyouen has a higher university entrance rate, and my home-room teacher at junior high kept nagging me to enroll there, so I simply followed along just to shut him up. Actually it doesn't really matter which high school I go to, really."

I decided to ask Koizumi as well,

"What about you? Why were you transferred here?"

"You ask me why, well, my answer's pretty much the same as Suzumiya-san's. I simply went to where my academic abilities led me. Besides, now I'm not saying North High's in any way bad, but Kouyouen was just so much better in terms of campus facilities."

True enough, North High doesn't even have air conditioning.

Haruki sighed and said,

"The SOS Brigade, huh? ......Sounds like fun,"

All thanks to you.

"If what you said were true,"

Cutting in was Koizumi, she had now toned down her smile and said with an amused look,

"Judging from your story, there exist two possibilities,"

Now that really sounds like something Koizumi would say.

"The first would be that you have entered a parallel universe, in which you have arrived from your world to this world; the second would be that the whole world has been changed except for yourself."

I've thought about that as well.

"Yet, no matter which one it is, there are still questions to be answered. If it's the former, then where did your counterpart in this world go to? If it's the latter, it's puzzling as to why you are the only one who remained unchanged. Unless you happen to possess some incredible power, then that would explain a lot."

I don't, and this I can guarantee.

Koizumi made her annoying trademark gesture by shrugging her shoulders gracefully and continued,

"If you have entered a parallel universe, then you must find a way to return to the world which you came from. If it's the world being completely altered, then you must find a way to restore the world to its original form. No matter which possibility it is, in order to resolve this, you have to find the culprit behind all this, since it's possible that the culprit would know how to return things to normal."

Who else could it be besides Haruki?

"Who knows? Maybe it's some invader from an alternate universe using Earth as a gaming platform. There might even be some evil mastermind that would appear in the future."

I could tell at once that she was making up all of this as she went along, since it was obvious from her tone that Koizumi was bullshitting. Yet Haruki didn't notice this at all, and his eyes even glimmered as he said,

"I'd sure like to meet this Nagato-san and Asahina-san. Oh yeah, I'd also want to have a look at that club room. If it was really me that has changed the world, then maybe we would remember something if we were to meet. Don't you think so too, Jane?"

Yeah, that's right. I had no reason to object. If this guy really was behind all this - or at least that's what I think anyway - then maybe it could trigger something within him, and even Nagato and Asahina-san might then be able to remember me. Once the alien and time traveler had returned to normal, then everything else could be resolved easily. Hang on, did he just call me Jane?

"You said you're called Kyon, right? Jane sounds better, since it feels more like a person's name, not to mention it's a very common Western name. Just who gave you that Kyon nickname? It doesn't sound as though people respect you at all."

It was my aunt who gave me that nickname, while my little brother was responsible for spreading it far and wide. Despite this, I felt very satisfied at this Suzumiya complaining about it. I wonder why, as it wasn't that long ago since I last heard that nickname. But earlier, didn't you say Jane Smith was a stupid name?


"Then, let's go."

I might as well try asking,

"Now? Where to?"

Haruki had already stood up and yelled boastfully at me,

"To North High, of course!"

In a blink of an eye, Haruki, who couldn't even stand waiting for the automatic door to open, had already rushed out of the coffee shop.

That was so like Haruki of him to do that, I was very relieved to see that.

Haruki, you sure are something. Once you think of something, you'll always get into action in less than two seconds. That's definitely you. Every time you kick the club room door open with a bullish attitude, we would know that you would have some amazing idea to announce. Nagato seemed to be the only one who would remain calm......

"Oh shit!"

I looked at my watch. It was way past school time. I had completely forgotten about the promise I made while I was at Nagato's apartment yesterday. I said I would go to the clubroom the next day, and yet I was late. An image floated in my head of Nagato looking depressed as he desperately waited for someone to knock on the door. Please wait a little longer. I'll be on my way.

Koizumi picked up the bill that Haruki left behind and said,

"So am I just paying for Suzumiya-san only?"

If you're paying for me as well, I'll tell you even more.

"In that case, I'm all ears."

I simply threw back everything that this esper girl has ever told me. Things like the anthropic principle, or how Haruki is a god, as well as how she went to great lengths to stage a murder mystery on a lone island in order to keep Haruki entertained.

Seeing Koizumi going into deep thought, I asked her,

"Could Haruki be the culprit or is it someone else altogether? Which do you think is correct?"

"If the Suzumiya-san that you mention really does possess omnipotent powers, then it's possible that it could be his doing,"

Well, I couldn't think of any other person. But then, if that's really the case, this means Haruki has kept Koizumi by his side while casting Nagato, Asahina-san and me aside. I don't want to sound like I'm complaining, but I just don't believe Haruki's more obsessed with Koizumi than any one of us. Was this part of Haruki's unconscious powers at work as well?

"Does that mean I should be feeling honoured at being chosen by Suzumiya-san?"

Koizumi giggled and continued,

"After all, I...... Yes, I fancy Suzumiya-san,"

"......Are you serious!?"

You are joking!?

"I think he's a very captivating person,"

Now where have I heard that before? Koizumi went on in a serious tone,

"Yet, Suzumiya-san is only interested in my superficial attributes. He said it was only because I'm a transfer student that he bothered to speak to me. As I'm just a normal transfer student, he seems to be getting bored of it lately. In that SOS Brigade that you mentioned, what sort of special attributes did you have? If you have none, then that means Suzumiya-san is very fond of you, that is if that Suzumiya-san is the same person as the Suzumiya-san I know,"

No matter when it was, I don't think I've written into my resume any skills that would get me sent straight to a funny farm, besides the pretty useless skill of getting myself unwittingly dragged into mysterious events.

Haruki stuck his head through the door and yelled at us with a bright smile on his face,

"Why're you two still here? Hurry up already!"

While Koizumi waited at the counter for the waitress to count the change, I took my first step from the heat-filled coffee shop back into the cold outdoors where a single breath becomes visible.

A taxi awaited outside the entrance of the coffee shop. Seems like Haruki had hailed it. It looks like he wanted to get to North High as soon as possible. By the way, this wasn't the mysterious black cab that Koizumi and I would occasionally ride on, but a normal yellow cab.

"To North High, full speed ahead!"

Haruki ordered the driver as he leapt into the cab. I followed with Koizumi and sat in the back seat. The middle-aged driver didn't wince at being ordered around by a youngster, but merely smiled tolerantly and stepped on the gas pedal.

"I don't really mind if you barge into North High," I said to the side of Haruki's face, "But your uniform would stand out too much. Students from other schools would need a reason to get in, or it'd be troublesome if the teachers found out."

Haruki was wearing his black gakuran uniform, while Koizumi was in black suit uniform. There weren't many students around in the afternoon since it was a half school day, but if they were to enter the territory of sailor uniformed and navy blue suit uniformed students like that, they would be openly declaring that they were from another school.

"Well, that's......"

Haruki thought for three seconds, then said,

"Jane, did you have PE lesson today? No, it doesn't matter even if you didn't. Your PE uniform is placed in your classroom, right?"

Well, I was playing volleyball during PE in the first session.

"Then, did you bring your track suit?"

I did, but why're you asking that for?

Haruki smiled enigmatically,

"I will now tell you my plan for this mission. Jane, Koizumi-kun, lend me your ears."

Does it really matter if the taxi driver overheard everything? Yet we still obediently leaned forward and listened as Haruki quietly laid out his mission briefings.

"That really sounds like what you'd do."

I replied, and took a glance at Koizumi, who gave a complicated look as she grimaced.

I put my hand on my face and shook my head. “Yare yare...” But behind my hand, I felt myself smiling.

[Tyabann]

Originally Posted by DJ_RockmanX

I know, but the shota doesn't exactly strike me as HAADO GEI material.

The original suggestion was that Mikuru should dress up as a dominatrix... Hard Gay was the closest male equivalent.

[Aebliss]

Originally Posted by DJ_RockmanX

I know, but the shota doesn't exactly strike me as HAADO GEI material.

And I see Aebliss has been hard at work.

It would be kind of -- no, it would be completely horrible to see Mitsuuru in that kind of position. My brain doesn't even want to construct a hypothetical picture ...
And I just felt the need to get this done. ^^ It helped me kill some time. Still, it's nice to have one's efforts noticed.

Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon

The original suggestion was that Mikuru should dress up as a dominatrix... Hard Gay was the closest male equivalent.

... I think the closest male equivalent would be to dress Mitsuuru up in leather, like those guys in the Blue Oyster, in the early Police Academy movies.



Last edit of the day, especially since Shaoron hasn't put up anything more to edit. ^^

Spoiler for Disappearance Chapter 3 Part 2: North High Invasion:

I got off the cab nearby North High first and went back to my classroom in order to prepare for Haruki's infiltration of North High.

By the way, the cab fare was also paid for by Koizumi. This Koizumi was basically Haruki's walking wallet. I don't know exactly why a girl would pay for everything for a guy. Isn't it usually the other way around? Could her feelings for Haruki be romantic? I'd really like to ask just what she fancies in Haruki. Yet I remember Taniguchi once said that despite being eccentric, Haruki was quite popular with the girls in junior high. That's not surprising; if he hadn't created the SOS Brigade in this school, then he would be busy rejecting every girl that comes to pursue him indiscriminately five minutes after starting a relationship. Does that mean the SOS Brigade is actually Haruki's sanctuary? By his becoming the undisputed leader of such a mysterious club, any sensible girl would automatically avoid him like a batter dodging a powerful pitch. Instead of being struck out three times and getting hit on the head by the ball, most people would prefer avoiding the ball altogether and taking it easy while walking towards the first base.

I thought this to myself while heading towards the top floor.

There weren't a lot of people in the school complex, but it wasn't entirely empty. Students who decided to stay for their club activities because they had nothing better to do at home were scattered here and there. Fortunately, the 1-5 classroom was empty. Actually I was quite afraid of being caught by Okabe-sensei. If I were her, I would want to know why someone who has decided to take the rest of the day off would want to sneak back into the classroom.

Someone decided to help out and tidied my desk, I guess it was probably Asakura. I was wondering where my books and stationery went, turns out they were put away. Only my bag hung on one side of my desk, while the leather shoes that I was looking for were hung on the other side of the desk.

"He sure has everything thought out."

I sighed at Haruki's meticulousness as I took out the sack containing my PE uniform. Inside this huge sports bag was a short-sleeved PE shirt, a pair of shorts, a trainer jacket and a pair of trousers, all of which were worn during PE in the first session. The infiltration plan that Haruki thought up of in the cab was obviously "disguising as North High students." "Koizumi-chan will wear your jacket and trousers. The infirmary should have some extra trousers for guys, go get them. Then we'll just run through the front gate. Anyone who sees us will simply think we're from the Athletics Club and have just finished our jogging. This plan is perfect."

In other words, like insects, we have to learn how to camouflage ourselves.

Actually, Haruki's initial plan was to have him wear my jacket and trousers while Koizumi would wear my PE uniform. The problem was that we couldn't find a spot for Koizumi to change into the bloomers. And since my body was smaller than Haruki's, he wouldn't be able to fit into my jacket and trousers. When I pointed that out, he suddenly grabbed a random guy walking out of the gate. It took some time for me to convince him not to do what he was planning, as it would just cause a problem. Thankfully, the poor guy was so freaked out he ran for the hills when Haruki finally released him.

After getting my bag, I ran to the infirmary and looked for an extra jacket and pair of trousers. It's a good thing that the nurse was out of the clinic when I got there. But just as I was about to leave, she came back and I had to lie b]about[/b] why I was taking the extra jacket, and one for a guy, at that, to be able to get out of there.

When I came back out, Haruki untied the ropes on my sack and mercilessly turned it upside down, emptying its contents. The four pieces of clothing were now lying on the concrete road as a result.

"Did you wash them?"

About a week ago.

"Excuse me, Suzumiya-san,"

Koizumi looked at the clothes like a desert mouse staring desperately at the Mongolian tiger that has forced it into a dead-end corner, and said,

"So where do we get changed? Is there some hidden place nearby?"

"We can change here,"

Haruki replied swiftly, and grabbed the trousers at once.

"There aren't many people here, and it's not that cold if you change quickly. Don't worry, I'll turn around. Jane, you turn around as well, we'll cover for her,"

He glanced quickly at me. What's that supposed to mean?

"If it's Jane, then I wouldn't mind being watched."

Koizumi smiled mischievously, then proceeded to put the trousers over her skirt. She then removed her blazer and put the jacket on.

Haruki on the other hand was shameless as usual. He just took his pants off right in front of us and then quickly put on the trousers I'd stolen from the clinic. Good thing we weren't on a large street and there was no one else besides us. He then took of his gakuran uniform and showed him wearing a plain white shirt underneath. He then tied up his semi-long hair.

"This isn't so bad. Now I look more like I'm from the Athletics Club. So you think it's OK?"

I think it's marvelous. For me, his charm has increased by at least 36%.

"Fallen in love yet?"

Just as I was wondering how to react to this, I realized he was only teasing me. I ought to have known better.

"Suzumiya-san, you're not going to wear your jacket?"

“I need that jacket to conceal my bag. I've already come this far disguised like this, I'm not going to let one bag ruin it."

Indeed, the schoolbags for Kouyouen School and North High were slightly different in their exterior design. Haruki opened up the track suit jacket like a table cloth and wrapped it around his and Koizumi's bags, and then ordered me to carry them. He then stuffed all his clothes and Koizumi's into my sack, and asked me to carry that as well.

"Now then,"

Haruki placed his hands on his hips and said,

"Now we look like we just came back from marathon practice. Not bad, huh?"

You're not bad, of course, but what about me? Where could you find an Athletic Club member carrying a lot of stuff while going on marathon training in regular uniform all at the same time?

"Well, you could think of yourself as the manager of the Athletic Club! And now! One, two, fight! One, two, fight!"

Yes, a girl in sailor uniform carrying all this stuff during a marathon run. Sheer genius, Haruki. You could fool everyone with such things .....

Before I could say that to him, he had already ran off while I exchanged glances with Koizumi. Then, we shrugged our shoulders at the same time as we followed him.

Both this Koizumi and I knew very well that it was tremendously difficult to stop Haruki from running off, no matter what the circumstances. So besides chasing after him, there was nothing else we could do.

It's always been like that, right?

I don't know if it's a good or bad thing, but unlike Kouyouen, the gates at North High are always open. Guards are nowhere to be found. Everything was going according to plan; Haruki's phony marathon run while shouting slogans came to an end quickly as we safely arrived at our destination, the entrance hall. I never thought it would be such a hassle just to bring Haruki and Koizumi into my school; they were still entering and leaving this place regularly three days ago.

"Such an old complex! Why are the walls prefabricated? Are prefecture schools really that poor? I was right not to enroll here."

I listened to his very correct statement while turning my gaze away from the rows of shoe lockers. I had already changed into my indoor shoes. Just when I was wondering whether there were any more slippers for guests, Haruki had already casually opened the locker nearest to him and was holding some random student's shoes.

It was just like Haruki to do that. I instinctively made a strange smile.

"What are you smiling for? You sure look stupid. It's not like I did anything funny."

After he said that, I quickly took my smile off. He was right: no matter what laws Haruki might break, now was not the time to be smiling.

I was thinking Taniguchi's foot size was probably about the same as Koizumi's, so I went and took Taniguchi's shoes and gave them to her.

"Sorry about that."

With a tone that didn't sound sorry at all, Koizumi thanked me politely and put on the shoes. I stuffed the sneakers that she was wearing into Taniguchi's locker.

I then took their bags, which were wrapped under the jacket, and carried them under my arm again.

"I'll lead the way, follow me."

"Hold it!"

As I was about to walk off, Haruki stopped me. He unconsciously toyed with his tied up hair with his fingers and said,

"That alien Nagato-san, he's in the Literature Club, right?

To be precise, the current Nagato is a normal high school otaku who was formerly an alien. Regardless, I guess he's still waiting for me to come over right now.

"That Nagato-san probably wouldn't run away. Let's go get that time traveller Asahina-san. Where is he?"

He's probably gone home...... Suddenly a thought came to my mind. My instincts weren't just for show, I didn't even need to trace my memories. I can say confidently that this Asahina-san who doesn't know me was a member of the Home Economics Club. Before he got dragged into the SOS Brigade, he claimed that he was a member of that club. That means he's still at school right now.

"All right then, this way."

I'm sorry, Nagato. Please wait just a little longer. We have to go to the Home Economics Club room before coming to look for you. Silently praying that the Home Economics Club was in today, I naturally increased my speed.



The one who opened the door to the club room was Haruki. That brute simply had no concept of the etiquette of knocking. I wasn't in the mood to lecture him on such minor details, while Koizumi stood uneasily in the corridor.

There were three girls and one guy in the kitchen, which is the Home Economics' club room; it looked like they were baking something for new year greetings.

"Which one of you here is Asahina-san?"

"......Can I help you?"

The only guy in the room widened his eyes and said in a timid voice.

"What is it......"

Asahina-san was standing on a counter, holding an eggbeater in mid-ari.

I leaned past Haruki's shoulder and inspected the room. Tsuruya-san wasn't here. I breathed a sigh of relief. I remembered that he wasn't in the Home Economics Club.

Haruki whispered in my ear,

"It's him, right? Is he really a second year student? He looks more like a junior high student."

"I too thought he was a junior high student. But you're right, he's Asahina-san."

After hearing that, Haruki walked inside in huge strides and began to bullshit at this little angel, who had stiffened while holding his utensil,

"I'm Suzumiya of the Student Council's Information Division. Asahina-san, the reason I've come is because there's something I need to ask you. Do you have a moment?"

You ought to script your lies better, especially when you're dressed in a short-sleeved T-shirt and sports trousers!

Asahina-san blinked his eyes nonstop and said nervously,

"Student Council...... Information Division? What is that...... But I don't know anything,"

"It doesn't matter, just come with me!"

Haruki snatched his eggbeater and threw it into a bowl whose contents Asahina-san was mixing, then grabbed Asahina-san's arm and forcefully pulled him up. The other club members were too stunned and frightened to be able to say anything. If Tsuruya-san were here, I might have been able to observe an interesting, out-of-this-world fight between him and Haruki. Haruki lifted Asahina-san up on his shoulders and simply abducted him without giving an explanation.

"Hmm, you're one of a kind. Your..."

I quickly put my mouth to Haruki's ear. Now's not the time to say such things, especially in front of those girls. Let's just go, ok?

"Kyaa! Wah! Wh... Wha... Eh!?"

Noticing me standing in front of his abductor, Asahina-san's eyes widened even further. He was probably thinking, It's that pervert from the other day! Asahina-san looked equally fearfully at Koizumi, who was standing by the door with a smile. Koizumi looked at Asahina-san as though looking at a stranger and said,

"I'm not a bad person, honest."

Stop trying to act as though you have nothing to do with it. Especially when you're dressed like that, Koizumi. It won't work.

"Hey, Jane, that leaves just Nagato-san. Hurry up and take me to him."

I don't need you to tell me that.

After all, I have to rush over to that place before some keen-eyed student or teacher who had discovered that I skipped classes finds me.

The place located on the third floor of the complex known as the Old Shack, the headquarters of the SOS Brigade, which is officially known as the club room for the Literature Club.



This time I knocked on the door before opening it.

"Hey, Nagato."

The bespectacled bookworm lifted his gaze from the thick hardback library book on the table,

"Ah......"

Seeing it was me, Nagato breathed a sigh of relief,

"Huh?"

When he saw Haruki following me in, his eyes widened,

"Huh ... wha...?"

Seeing Asahina-san being carried in by Haruki, he opened his jaw,

"......"

When he saw Koizumi enter last, he was speechless.

"Hi there,"

Haruki smiled brightly. After making sure everyone was in the room, he went and locked the door. Click! Upon hearing this sound, both Nagato and Asahina-san had the same reaction - their bodies stiffened in fear.

"W... What are you doing?"

It was just like that day, Asahina-san was close to tears.

"W... Where is this place? Why did you bring me here? And, w... Why are you locking the door? What do you want with me?"

It was the exact same response, even I was moved to tears by this nostalgia.

"Shut up!"

Just like that day, Haruki had the situation forcefully under control. He proceeded to inspect the whole room.

"So that four-eyed person is Nagato-san? Hi there! I'm Suzumiya Haruki! This one here is Koizumi-kun; while this little boy here who is extraordinarily feminine is Asahina-san. As for that girl, you should know her, right? She's Jane Smith!"

"Jane Smith...?"

Nagato looked stunned as he pushed the rims of his glasses and looked at me in disbelief. I shrugged my shoulders and accepted this stupid name. Both Kyon and Jane sounded stupid anyway.

"So... This is the SOS Brigade, huh? There's not a lot in here, but it's not a bad room. It's worth bringing some stuff over."

Like a curious cat being brought to a new residence, Haruki wandered around the room, looked out of the window, examined the books on the bookshelf with a look of interest, and then he said to me,

"So, what do we do next?"

Don't tell me you didn't think of that before deciding to come over? Man, that was so like Haruki's way of thinking.

"I'm for making this room into our headquarters, but it's so inconvenient to get here. It'll be a waste of time to come over here after school. I don't have any connections with anyone from North High. Oh yeah, why don't we just set a time and meet at the coffee shop in front of the station?"

After saying this, no one besides me and the boy who was talking knew what was going on.

Nagato looked like a clueless otaku with a troubled look; Asahina-san acted strangely as he trembled; while Koizumi began her miming act.

I've got to say something, however, before I was able to speak...


Ding!


Suddenly, the computer which no one touched made some electronic noises. Nagato turned his head instinctively.

"Huh?"

Asahina-san had to lift himself up on his toes in order to see what was going on. All my knowledge about how these machines work has been sucked away by this strange computer.

The ancient cathode ray tube screen made a static noise, and slowly illuminated - I only knew this from the reflection on Nagato's glasses.

This was supposed to be corresponded by the sound of the hard disk spinning, yet no sound could be heard. I've seen this happen before... No, I remember back then I had to turn the machine on first... The OS screen did not appear, instead the screen displayed an odd sight that looked very familiar...

"Let me have a look,"

My body moved on its own. I pushed Haruki aside and dashed to the front of the screen.

Silently displayed on the dark gray screen was a line of words.


YUUKI.N > If you are reading this, I am probably no longer myself.


...Yes, that's it, Nagato...


"What's going on here? No one's typing anything, this is creepy!"

"Maybe it's been programmed to turn on at a certain time? But this computer sure looks old. It must've been a lot of work for such an old machine."

I could not listen to anything Haruki and Koizumi said behind me. I didn't even dare to blink, for fear of missing a single word or sentence. I could hear my heart thumping in my ears as I stared at the screen.


YUUKI.N > When this message appears, it means that you, me, Suzumiya Haruki,
Asahina Mikuru and Koizumi Itsuko have all been gathered here.


It was as if the words were moving to match my reading speed. Without any decorative description, the cursor then typed out the following words:


YUUKI.N > This is the key. You have found the answer.


I didn't exactly find the answer. It was more like me stumbling onto it while being forcefully dragged along in Haruki's wake together with Koizumi. This Haruki sure is quite useful... By the way, Nagato, it's been a while.

I watched the words on the screen, feeling nostalgic. Though the lines were silent, inside my heart I could hear Nagato reading each word monotonously. The cursor continued to move:


YUUKI.N > This is the Emergency Escape Program. To activate it, hit the "Enter" key, otherwise,
hit any other key. Once activated, you will be given a chance to repair the space-time continuum.
However, neither success nor your safe return can be guaranteed.


Emergency Escape......Program. That's it! It's in this computer!


YUUKI.N > This program can only be executed once. Once it is executed, it will be deactivated.
Should you choose not to activate it, it will also be deactivated. Are you ready?


This was the last line of words. The cursor at the end flickered non-stop.

Should I hit "Enter"? Or should I hit some other key?

When I came to my senses, I realized Haruki was peeking over my shoulder.

"What does it all mean? Is it some secret organization? Jane, stop fooling around and explain already!"

I completely ignored Haruki, Koizumi and Asahina-san. During this moment, my eyes were neither fixed on Haruki with his hair tied up, Koizumi in my PE uniform, nor the ever-so-cute Asahina-san. I had put all my attention onto this computer and the only other person in this room. I said to the bespectacled boy who was staring at the screen looking stunned:

"Nagato, do you have any recollection of this?"

"...No!"

"Are you sure?"

"Why do you ask? I really don't know!"

Why was he in such a hurry to deny any involvement? It was you who typed those words......I had wanted to say that, but if I did, this Nagato would probably freak out.

I decided to examine the last part of the message once again.

This was a message Nagato left for me, it was the Nagato who I knew before that wrote it. To be honest, I didn't really understand what this Emergency Escape Program meant, and the disclaimer about success not being completely guaranteed unsettled me.

Yet, I've come this far, there's no point fretting about it. I used to place my entire trust on that Nagato, and I could only trust him again now. He rarely makes any mistakes. Besides trusting Nagato, the silent alien-created Living Humanoid Interface who has saved my life numerous times, who else could I trust? If I doubt even what he says, then I really need to doubt what my mind is thinking.

"Hey, Jane. What's wrong? You look so strange."

Haruki's voice sounded as if it came from a distance.

"Please leave me alone for a while. I'm trying to organize my thoughts."

Right now, I really needed to think things over. A Haruki and Koizumi who go to a different school, an Asahina-san who wasn't a time traveler, and a Nagato who doesn't seem to know anything. After thinking about these, I realized that these weren't the things I should be worrying about now.

The words written by Nagato on the screen were his personal thoughts. The genuineness of that message cannot be doubted.

I stretched my arms and took a deep breath.

That's it...

The only thing I was sure about, was that I wanted to get out of this world. I wanted to see the SOS Brigade once again, which I was so familiar with that it has become a part of my daily life, as well as everyone in that world. The Haruki, Asahina-san, Koizumi and Nagato here weren't the ones that I knew. There was no 'Organization' or Integrated Data Entity here, and the adult version of Asahina-san would never visit this world, since everything's so messed up.

It didn't take me long to make up my mind.

I took out a crumpled piece of paper from my cardigan...

"I'm sorry, Nagato, but you can have it back."

Nagato's pale fingers slowly reached out to receive the blank club application form. Once I let go, the application form fluttered about, though there was hardly any wind in here. After missing his grip once, he finally grabbed hold of it the second time around.

"This..."

Nagato's voice was even shaking, his eyes concealed by the glare in his glasses.

"However," I quickly explained, "to tell you the truth, I was already a member of this room to begin with. There was no need for me to join the Literature Club. The reason being..."

Haruki, Koizumi and Asahina-san all looked at me and clearly thought, What the hell is she talking about? Nagato's expression was covered by his hair, so I couldn't see properly. It doesn't matter. Don't worry, Nagato. No matter what happens next, I'll definitely return to this room.

"The reason being, I'm a member of the SOS Brigade."

Are you ready?

You bet.

I stretched out my finger and hit the "Enter" key.


In the next moment......


"Whoa!?"

When I stood up, I was hit by a very intense dizziness. I involuntarily grabbed hold of the desk as my vision spun before me. I could feel my ears buzzing as I heard the sounds of people talking coming from afar. Everything went black. I lost all sense of balance, I felt as though I was drifting around, just like a tree leaf that had fallen into a rapid, spinning forever non-stop. The voices calling me started to drift away, what were they trying to say? Was it Jane or Kyon? I wasn't sure myself, it didn't sound like it was Haruki calling. It was so dark .. was I falling? Where was I falling to? Someone should at least tell me.

My thoughts were in complete chaos. Were my eyes really open? I couldn't see anything, nor could I hear anything. I could only feel myself floating. Just where was my body? What about Haruki? Everything's gone twisted. Koizumi, Asahina-san, where am I? Just where was I going? Just what awaits me in this Emergency Escape Program?

Nagato......

"Whoa!?"

I yelled once again, my ankles were nearly cracked as I barely managed to support myself. It was only then I realized I was still standing.

"What the hell...?"

It was dark everywhere, though not dark enough that you couldn't see your own fingers. I was relieved I could still see.

"Where am I..."

Looking out at the dim lights shining into the window, I confirmed my position. This looks like a room, and I seem to be holding on to a table. On top of the table was an old computer...

"The Literature Club room!"



It was the Literature Club room from before.

Yet Nagato wasn't here. Haruki, Asahina-san and Koizumi had also vanished. Only I remained. The sun seemed to have set already, even though sunlight was still shining through the window a while ago. It's gone dark rather a bit too quick. I looked through the window and into the sparsely populated night skies, seeing the few stars glittering. Time sure flies by quickly.

The room was the same as before. There was a bookshelf, a long table, and an old computer. I understood at once just by seeing these. I didn't return to my original world, since there wasn't any stuff from the SOS Brigade. The Commander's Desk wasn't here, neither was Asahina-san's cosplay wardrobe. It was still an empty Literature Club room ... but...

The sweat on my forehead dripped into my eyes. I promptly wiped it off with the sleeves of my cardigan.

Something's not right.

Just what was this disorienting feeling? I already knew where I was. This was indeed the Literature Club room. Had I really turned into some kind of crazy taiko drum? I suddenly remembered the pun Taniguchi made earlier, but that's not the problem. Yes, the problem wasn't about where this place was.

"This is..."

Suddenly, I discovered the truth of why I was feeling so disoriented! At the same time, my body temperature felt as though it has risen sharply, but that wasn't quite accurate. The truth was that the surrounding temperature was already high, hence my body temperature had risen as well, so it wasn't an illusion.

I couldn't take it anymore, and took off my cardigan. All the pores in my body opened up at once and sweated. I rolled up the sleeves of my uniform, yet the heat accumulated inside the room barely dispersed.

"This is too hot!"

I began to grumble.

"It's feels as hot as..."

A hot summer's night.

In that case, there was only one question I should be asking right now,


What season is it right now?

[Tyabann]

Originally Posted by Aebliss

... I think the closest male equivalent would be to dress Mitsuuru up in leather, like those guys in the Blue Oyster, in the early Police Academy movies.

Well, it was funny. You gotta admit that.

[Roger Rambo]

Originally Posted by Aebliss

As usual, I got out of bed, feeling as though my stomach had been stuffed with a few dozen .300mm bullets.

...I'm sorry, but this just hurts my inner /k to much.



...Ok, let me illustrate this simply.

Spoiler for 9mm round:

The above image, is a 9milimeter round. It is classified this, because the barrel of the gun that fires this round has a diameter of 9 millimeters. The 9mm pistol round, is also considered by many to be inadequate for putting down a human being. 9 millimeters is also happens to be thirty times larger than .300 millimeters.

...I am not convinced that a .300 millimeter bullet would bother even someone as irritable as Kyonko.

I think whoever wrote that passage, was thinking of a .300 caliber (Indicating a Bore diameter measured in inches) as opposed to a .300mm (Bore measured in millimeters).

[Kagedanji]

FOOO~!

Watch as I thrust my pelvis! Faster. Faster! You think it looks slow? You are wrong. It is actually moving ultra fast, too fast for the human eye. You only see the residual image.


This needs to be in the dialogue.

[Kang Seung Jae]

Originally Posted by DJ_RockmanX

I know, but the shota doesn't exactly strike me as HAADO GEI material.

The Fangirl in you is weak.

[DJ_RockmanX]

Originally Posted by Kang Seung Jae

The Fangirl in you is weak.

Not weak. Just squelched by the much more logical fanboy.

[Kang Seung Jae]

Originally Posted by DJ_RockmanX

Not weak. Just squelched by the much more logical fanboy.

The Fangirl happens to be more logical than the Fanboy.

[Kagedanji]

You're starting to fuel "man/fems ish superior" comments. The power of crack compels you.

[DJ_RockmanX]

Originally Posted by Kang Seung Jae

The Fangirl happens to be more logical than the Fanboy.

Not in my case.

Originally Posted by Kagedanji

You're starting to fuel "man/fems ish superior" comments. The power of crack compels you.

I leave it to you to to bring us back to insanity.

[Kang Seung Jae]

Originally Posted by DJ_RockmanX

I leave it to you to to bring us back to insanity.

Let us imagine: If Kyon gets transformed into Kyonko (while retaining his mental identity as a male), how wild do you think Haruhi will get with him/her?

[Kagedanji]

Does the fact that he retains his male subconscious really matter?

[Kang Seung Jae]

Originally Posted by Kagedanji

Does the fact that he retains his male subconscious really matter?

In my opinion, yes.

I figure Haruhi would love to play with a male-minded Kyonko than a all-female Kyonko.