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2008-11-15, 00:10
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Link #10981 | |
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Too much Caffine
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Under your Bed
Age: 40
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 WHOOT!! Page claim!  Page Claim for... Umm... Claiming stuff, ya
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"For Life is experience, and longevity is, in the end, measured by memory, and those with a thousand tales to tell have indeed lived longer then any who embrace the mundane."
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2008-11-15, 00:51
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Link #10982 |
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Random Translator
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: New Brunswick
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Incomplete fanfic... I thought I share a few pages. Still a work in progress. Involved the Number Tre!
Spoiler for Rapture:
Terium 22, 0078
2:43 p.m. I am Tre. Where do I begin in the story of who I am? I should start at the beginning of my creation I suppose. I can safely say, that I am one of the very few in this world that has had the privilege, or perhaps the trauma, of knowing everything that had happened on the day of my ‘birth’ or rather my activation. I have found no novel or article that has described such an experience. Thus I find myself at a loss to describe it but I shall try. It was like being in darkness but not knowing what darkness is. It was like being warm but not knowing what warmth was. I floated in an existence that was between death and life, at the same time not knowing what death or life was. Existing but not knowing what existence was. It was comforting I suppose. To be cocooned in a reassuring nothingness, where it was unchanging, where it was safe, where everything was as it should be because it was all that existed. Then a burst of consciousness! Of awareness! Of endlessly fascinating and terrifying sensations! Eyes that had never seen before, seeing. Ears that had never heard sound before, hearing. The first sensation of cold, pain and disorientation. That static nothingness feel away in a violent burst of chaos. I had life, where none had ever existed before. And I had no idea what it was. I didn’t understand anything that was happening to me. It was the most wondrous, most terrifying experience that I had ever come to know. Even now as I write of it, I shiver at the memory of it. The sheer novelty of it all was so overwhelming that I could only violently lash out in the cold liquid of my birthing tube. My mind reeled and tried to chase the fleeing nothingness that I had come from. I almost succeeded. You see, I was about to suffer from ‘Sensory Burnout’. My creator, Jail Scaglietti, had already uploaded a program that was supposed to adjust my mind to activation by already familiarizing me to senses, and basic mundane physical functions such as walking, blinking and breathing. But for some reason, the program was delayed in my internal memory banks when I was activated. It barely kicked in time to rescue me from the nothingness. It was rapture! I knew that I was alive! I knew what it was to see! I knew what it was to fear! I knew. I knew. I knew. I knew what I was seeing! What I was feeling! What I was hearing! I cannot begin to emphasize the heights of my joy of that moment. Of the sheer power of knowing, but the sudden realization of existence almost caused me to return to the nothingness I had come from. For the rapture pierced my mind, it was like a blade cutting away all doubts and leaving none of the mysteries a mind must have to protect itself, to challenge itself, to experience. It was like knowing every corner, every high and every low of existence. I was suffering an ‘Information Shock’ on the heels of my ‘Sensory Burnout’. It was as though that it was enough, I knew everything there was to know and thus I no longer needed to keep on existing. There was nothing outside the knowledge I had because that was all there was. I almost fell back into the nothingness again. It was my sister Due who was my salvation. She called me, she begged me not to go. To struggle and to open my eyes to see the world that I was about to leave. The sound of her voice proved that there was more to know, more to hear, more to see. It was enough to force me to open my eyes. The thick blurry glass separated us, her outside and I inside the birthing tube. Due was on the verge of tears, her hands were pressed hard on the glass. I remembered pressing my small hand against the glass to align it with hers. I could feel the warmth from her hand travel through the glass. That was my activation. And it was an extremely disastrous one. I had to contend with two extremely wrenching activation errors that had almost killed me. The Doctor was frothing at the mouth in panic at the realization that I almost didn’t even activate. I remember this quite clearly; after the water drained away and the glass was lifted I was finally released from the birthing tube to my older sister’s awaiting arms. She covered me in a warm blanket and carried me to the main lab. There I was greeted with sound of the Doctor furiously ranting to himself and my other older sister Uno. “GAH! I can’t believe I forgot to do that! And that! And … well I did do that and that but IT DIDN’T WORK! Uno! Make a note on everything that went wrong, we can’t have that happen again! Not if we want to get the other two activated safely!” “Doctor, please calm yourself. I am making the necessary notes and adjustments. Why don’t you open your bottle of wine and drink a cup of it.” I remember the Doctor uncorking the bottle and drinking straight from it. After he had done so, he took me from Due. He was all excited that I had survived my activation and hurriedly ran tests and went down a list of checks. I failed two of them. One was speech. I couldn’t make a sound. Despite the fact I could understand everything that the Doctor and my two older sisters were saying, I could not speak. My vocal cords were working perfectly and it appeared that my ‘inborn knowledge’ had properly uploaded into my brain but my brain didn’t quite understand how to do it. The second one was more crippling. My sense of balance was off. I could not keep myself sitting upright, I could not stand and I could not walk. It was a constant struggle, as though the table and floor were constantly pitching and turning. The best I could do was crawl and even that was a challenge. The Doctor smiled at me kindly. The same way that one would smile at a cripple while planning to do something painful to the same cripple. You see… he was… It’s difficult to write this. He was planning to try activating the next cyborg. This time armed with knowledge of how to avoid the two deadly activation errors. In effect, he was planning to have me deactivated, which is to say that he was going to kill me, but at the time I didn’t realize this. My two older sisters did. Uno was placid; she shared the Doctor’s thoughts perfectly. If I could not be of use, then at the very least I would help my future sisters with the data collected from my near failed activation and salvaging of parts. They apparently were having a telepathic conversation at the time. They didn’t want to debate aloud of what they were thinking of doing to me. Due saved me again. She became very still and very quiet. Engaging in a furious debate and trying to convince the Doctor and Uno that I was still salvageable. At the time, I was on the floor desperately trying to stand and walk a little but all I ended up doing was crawling and crashing face first into the floor. I desperately wanted to please my older sisters and creator, not because I wanted to save myself from being deactivated, I had no idea that they were considering deactivating me, but because I was so convinced that they would be impressed by the little accomplishments I could do. I resolved to learn how to speak in an hour! I had no idea how long an hour was but I did have the word in my vocabulary! How wonderful it would be to speak. I could ask questions of all sorts and listen to their answers! I also resolved to get the hang of ‘walking’ in a day! I reckoned that a day was double that of an hour. How great it would be to travel about without Due to carry me. After my third failure to stand and walk. I looked up and saw the three of them very still and deep in thought. The debate had come to a fine balance of my survival. The arguments that Due presented to keeping me alive had given the Doctor and Uno pause. I tipped the balance in favour of my continued existence when I crawled towards to Due and tugged at her leg. ‘Hey! I need a hand up!’ I remember sending a telepathic message to them via magic. It was natural for me, it never occurred to me that it was supposed to take time and training to be able to use communication magic. I managed to completely derail their conversation. “Did… Did you just use a communication spell?” Due asked startled. She spoke with her voice to see if I would answer back. ‘Um… yes. Now are you going to help me up?’ I was still using telepathic communication. That settled it. I would live, for the moment at least. Due picked me up into her arm and looked extremely relieved. The Doctor was impressed; his eyes were shining with fascination. “I suppose she can remain for a little while at least. Hm… Saved again for the third time, you’re very lucky. Third time’s a charm as they say… Well I already have Uno and Due. Your name shall be Tre!” “Tre? Doctor, why can’t you come up with a more inventive name?” “I’m thinking doing a naming theme for all my creations! The fourth shall be Quattro! And the fifth, Cinque!” And that was my first day of existence. My first day alive and it nearly ended up with me being deactivated permanently. I wish I had lived life without knowing about this but alas, I learned about my near brush with destruction in a very cruel way.
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I do not like Kansai-ben, but I do like Hayate-chan!
 Also, Canadian here, not actually Japanese. |
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2008-11-15, 01:54
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Link #10983 | |
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The Last One
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: the country that's falling into the sea
Age: 38
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- Keep It Simple - |
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2008-11-15, 03:27
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Link #10984 | |
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Undercover Mole
 Graphic Designer
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: ~Floating on the edge
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@Satashi: Wow PS!Vivio has gotten long.
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2008-11-15, 04:58
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Link #10985 | |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: PEI, Canada
Age: 39
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>.<; I'll be honest. Took me a while to finally start reading this. Maybe cause it was back when I was too busy working and the first few chapters got lost to me. >.>; I wish I had started sooner though, as I love this. Fate and Bardiche are too cute X3 I vote A! Save your friends. (Also, I have to laugh. When I read the name of the microbe-thing, The Blight, I couldn't help but be reminded of potatoes. The Blight is a bad thing to have happen to potatoes, and I usually hear it in the news a lot where I live. So I snickered a bit when I seen the name.)
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2008-11-15, 05:15
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Link #10986 |
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Even if it just for a bit
Author
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Cold Storage
Age: 32
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Spoiler for Message:
Inspired by this Cause i cant link well. A blue dog walked on the streets. He had been alone all of his life and he was quite happy with that. He had always thought that feeling for others was too bothersome, and he had always being discriminated by his strange color of fur. He had suffered physical violence and had withstood the insults of many people in its life. He was a loner, a wolf with no purpose of existence. “Are you alright?” One day he heard a voice ask to him. The voice belonged to a blonde girl with red eyes. “Are you unwell?” she asked again, hoping that the dog would answer. Seeing that the dog didn’t talk, she took it on her hands and simply said. “We are alike you know?” The dog was scared. Why was a human being nice to him? Did she plan on doing something to him? The dog decided to not take any chances and scratched her hands and, when he had fallen to the floor, he started to run. Unfortunately, his wounds and his tiredness were catching up with him and he was quickly caught by the blonde “Don’t worry I wont hurt you.” She said and the dog, although not believing her, decided to rest on her. He was tired after all. --- “Stay calmed, don’t move. “ The blonde, Fate a painter, was trying to capture his image once again. Two long years have passed and the dog had finally established some sort of relationship between the painter and him. “Zafira, don’t move.” The painter cried out. She was getting tired of trying to make the dog to stay quiet, an impossible task. She had only painted about him in the lasts years, as a sign of trust. Unfortunately the paints hadn’t sold very well. People didn’t like to stare at that freak of nature it seemed. Getting her materials was harder with the little money she made and feeding the dog and her was complicated, nonetheless she could make it. That was until one day Fate fell ill. The dog didn’t know what to do and he just looked at how her master got more and more pale and she grew quiet. One day, all of a sudden she started to write a letter. “For the one I love,” she explained to the wolf. Her writing was becoming erratic and more illegible. She was getting desperate at the thought of not finishing her letter. As she felt her last moments, she turned to the dog and, using her remaining strength, she smiled and said. “Can you give it to her? She is in that place I have talked about too much.” The dog took the letter and saw how the remaining of her life went away. Zafira decided that to honor their friendship and took the letter. Giving one last glance to his friend, the dog left running. --- “What is this dog?” “He is a servant of the devil.” “He is trying to kill us.” He heard many stupid things in his way. But he didn’t care about it, he had to arrive to her friend´s hometown. He had been running for days. He hadn’t stopped, he had to honor his friend and it was his way of saying thank you. Days passed, and he still ran. His body was damaged, he couldn’t see with his left eye, his fur was mixed with blood, but his will was unshakeable. He kept running, running to arrive to the place where Fate´s, his friend´s, special person lived before his body gave up. He saw the house that he always imagined, the house which was a myth for him until now. He pushed himself forward, trying to not feel the pain, to arrive. So close yet so far. --- A brunette heard something at her door. It seemed like something or someone had crashed on it. Worried about that, the brunette opened the door to see a blue dog. He was covered in wounds and his fur was blue mixed with red. His left eye was completely damaged and he had something in its mouth. Carefully she saw that it was a letter directed to her. The contents of the letter explained who the god was, why had been sent and the last minutes of Fate. The brunette couldn’t handle it and started to cry. The dog passed away having honored their friendship. Later that day, the brunette would bury the dog. He would bury her messenger. Done at 2 to 4am... too many mistakes.
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2008-11-15, 06:45
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Link #10987 | |
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Inactive Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
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A Quote:
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2008-11-15, 09:36
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Link #10988 |
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Junior Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
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Well after lurking moar since about page 300 I thought I'd attempt to contribute something to the thread.
I got lured here originally by Satashi waxing lyrical about the wonders of this forum and this thread on Fanfiction.net (there's another story regarding how I found out about Satashi's fanfics  ) and decided to investigate and since then I've spent many a day at work trawling the thread in search of new shiny things. I'm not going to attempt a review of the last 250 pages so you can breathe a sigh of relief. I also bring my first fanfic attempt ever. It's a bit dark and probably cliched so be aware.  Spoiler for Loss:
It had happened again.
The one thing that still haunted her nightmares had been born to reality again. They had been tasked with investigating ancient ruins on a distant planet that had shown signs of harbouring a lost logia. A standard mission, no different from the countless others they had worked together, and certainly no challenge for the Ace of Aces and herself. It had happened too quickly. She had been unable to react in time as the droid, which had seemed no different from the rest that they had mown down, had fired a barrier-breaking blast which had caught her companion off-guard. Magical Shields, Barrier Jackets and anything else in it's way had been ignored as the blast had continued it's unwavering course to it's destination of the wall on the other side of her close friend. The lost logia-equipped droid had not stood a chance after that, it was dispatched instantly and emotionlessly as she raced towards the wounded, hoping that she would be in time. This was the reality she was faced with now. As she cradled Nanoha in her arms, she could only stare in horror at the scene before her. No. This was just a dream, another nightmare like before. No. This was impossible. No. It had happened before, it would be OK just like before. No. It wasn't like before.... Uncountable tears already covered the charred and bloody Barrier Jacket that lay before her, she could not remember how long she had cried for, too long it seemed. A twitch. She could only stare as Nanoha's eyes twitched open and watch on in hope as a small smile appeared on the face of the one she had admired for so long. "I'm sorry for scaring you like that, I guess I got careless again" Nanoha's voice came haltingly "This seems strangely familiar for some reason, it's like we've been here before." A cough racked the remains of Nanoha's chest as thick red liquid stained her lips. "I guess I'll have to let you take it from here, and I guess I've got more rehabilitation time ahead of me" she attempted to giggle but only managed another racking cough, staining her jacket further with red. "But first I think I'll take a short nap, it's been a long day...". She could only watch in horror as Nanoha's eyes closed once again. "No!" she cried "You can't sleep now!" for she knew what the result would be if she let those eyes close again. She shook Nanoha, she had to keep her awake until help came. No response answered her efforts. "No! You have to wake up! We have to get you to safety!" but the body in her arms only response was to relax. "You can't die now! I never told you I loved you! Stupid!" Her final cry echoing through the ruins that day as she wept over the body of her lost loved one. She could never tell if her eyes had been playing tricks on her that day, but she was sure a hint of a smile had reappeared on that serene face below her just before the end. To Vita, however, it would be a smile she would remember for the rest of her days. If anyone wants to R&R it would be greatly appreciated, I don't think it's that good but it'd be nice to know what I can improve. |
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2008-11-15, 14:35
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Link #10989 |
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Master of the Shiny Crack
AuthorJoin Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a cave
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I'd been struggling with RebelS for a while when I realized what was keeping me from writing it. I wasn't happy with it at all. So I decided to go back and rehaul everything. This is a complete rewrite. New scenes, only two touched up ones, redone OCs, fixed up plot, and a story that incorporates canon much better @.@ makes me dizzy just thinking about it. However, I think it's truly better than the original version and I'm happy to release it. So here it is...
Magical Girl Lyrical Vivio RebelS ~Redux~ Chapter 1 A New Hero, Vivio Takamachi, age 15! Spoiler for Chapter 1 part 1:
Magical Girl Lyrical Vivio RebelS ~Reduex~ Chapter 1 A New Hero, Vivio Takamachi, age 15! Mid-Childa, Caranage, MC 085 Every generation, since the dawn time, great heroes arise from scores of mundane people, heck the ancient Greeks had them by the dozen. Heroes, who break the cycle of boring everyday tasks to have daring adventures and who protect the innocent people of the universe from wicked and evil fiends. Heroes whose tales would be told over and over again ad nausea. Heroes who would have historically inaccurate movies made about them! They had all had their turn at glory and now it was the time of the newest of them all Vivio Takamachi! At least she would be were she allowed to do things on her own. “I don’t need a babysitter!” Vivio Takamachi, age fifteen, was in a sour mood. She’d been waiting for this day, this single solitary moment, for years. This was the day she was supposed to complete her first solo mission. This was supposed to be her chance to shine, her moment to show the world Vivio Takamachi was ready to kick some baddie booty. And unless the dictionary had changed, solo still meant alone, not alone plus a giant blue wolf! “I am merely an observer,” Zafira stated with the same bored look the wolf always had. If years of being taken care of by the sometimes man had taught Vivio anything it was that he only had three faces: serious, bored and mildly amused. “Please continue as you would normally.” Vivio’s eye twitched, “If you’re an observer then what are Rein and Agito!” She flung her arm out, pointing at the two unison devices floating above them. “Then,” the wolf looked up contemplating the molding on one of the buildings, the length of time he took suggested something deep was formulating in his head. “perhaps backup?” “If you don’t know then don’t answer.” She puffed out her cheeks and put her hands on her hips, “Shesh they’re so overprotective. “I believe your mother is only looking out for you,” Zafira sat back on his haunches in the air as Vivio looked the other way, still annoyed. “As are your aunts and uncles.” Vivio had grown up nicely. Opposed to the view into the future Nanoha had seen during the Jail Scaglietti incident, Vivio had grown into a happy young woman. Like her mama she kept her hair tied up in a giant side ponytail but hers was far thinner then Nanoha’s. She had a pretty cheerful face and would easily hold the attention of any boy; of course that boy would then have to go through a family of mages. Despite that Vivio still wasn't looking for anyone, not that she didn't want anyone but there was no time for romance in her busy life. “But come on I’m not five!” And that family of mages did meddle. Nary a day went by without every member asking about every single insignificant event that happened in the young woman's life, her cousins didn't get this kind of scrutiny why did Vivio? “Come on let’s get going Vivio!” Agito looped around in the air. The red head had fit in well with Wolkenritter, it was hard for Vivio to imagine she had ever not been a part of them,“I have important things to do!” “But I thought Signum gave you the day off to help Vivio?” Rein tilted her head to the side, blinking in innocent confusion. Agito whacked Rein over the head, her face flushed with embarrassment, “stupid!” “Why are you so mean Agito-chan?” Rein rubbed her head. “Why are you so childish?” Agito yelled back. The two only acted like they hated each other. Ten years had been plenty of time for them to grow rather fond of the other's company, and not a single person fell for their act anymore. “Ehem!” Vivio drew the attention back to her. Rein and Agito straightened up and came to attention. Then they seemed to remember exactly who it was they were talking to and relaxed again. Rein floated forward, “Please state your name and rank.” Vivio sighed, the formality would have been humorous had Vivio been in a better mood, “You’ve known me since I was five. Is this really necessary?” Agito groaned and crossed her arms, “Just say ‘em so we can get on with it.” Vivio half-heartedly saluted, “Vivio Takamachi, TSAB Part-Timer.” Technically she was a member of the TSAB but a certain high ranked aunt's interference had made sure Vivio wasn't assigned to a unit until one opened up within the city. As a result she was nothing more than a part time agent. “You too Zaffy,” the red head glared down at the wolf. The name Zaffy had caught on within the entire family and some out of it, he still only willingly let Vivio call him by that name though. “I am Zafira, the official bodyguard of Commander Hayate Yagami and Vivio H. Takamachi’s current overseer,” Zafira's bored look remained on his face. “Now for the briefing,” Agito pulled up a screen. “Alright,” She messed with the screen, screwing her forehead up in concentration. “Let’s see…” Data flew by at an incredibly fast rate but Agito seemed to understand it all. “Ah here.” Suddenly the data came to a halt, stopping on a single screen. “Your job is really easy, so even though you’re a kid you should be able to handle it.” “I don’t want an easy mission!” Vivio protested. She wanted to prove herself not be known as someone who took the easy way out. Rein giggled, “When Agito-chan— “Don’t call me that!” “—says easy she means medium level difficulty, don’t worry Hayate specifically requested you do this one.” Vivio nodded but still rolled her eyes, if Aunt Hayate had requested it there would probably also be cushions laid out in case Vivio tripped. It was no secret that Hayate looked out for her niece a bit more than was necessary. “Alright then what is it?” “It’s a retrieval mission,” Agito spun the screen around so it faced Vivio. “Your job is to retrieve the lost logia on this truck,” A large transport vehicle was displayed on the monitor. Nothing that made it look out of the ordinary… except for the lack of any markings. Not a scratch on it, or any sort of label. “What kind of logia?” Vivio raised an eyebrow, curious as to what the hell she was fetching. Agito shrugged, “Who knows.” Vivio brushed back a lock of hair and looked towards the sky exasperatedly as if asking whatever was out there to stop screwing with her, “Thanks for the help Agito.” The unison device missed the sarcasm in the teen’s voice and merely grinned. “No prob!” “Falling Soul!” Vivio held out a small orange cube in her hand. “Set up!” [...meh] The distinctly male AI mumbled in English. [I don't really feel like it.] “Falling Soul!” Vivio flailed about like a two year old trying get her mother to buy her a new toy. “This isn't the time!” [I'm tired. You practiced all day yesterday. I deserve vacation time.] “You're a device! This is your job,” To anyone watching this scene it'd be hard to tell who exactly was the master in this situation. [You get vacations, rather long ones. So why don't I. I'm thinking a nice ocean planet.] “Alright I have to work tomorrow so you can vacation then.” [On your arm. Not exactly a vacation resort.] Zafira finally stepped in. He looked down at the device, treating it like he would have treated Vivio when she was being childish. “Behave or I'll allow Shari to present you to the scientific community and let them analyze you all they want.” The device decided to test his luck. [You wouldn't dare.] “Care to test that?” Zafira stayed steady, it'd worked with Vivio when she was little and it worked with Falling Soul now. [Setting up.] The cube glowed, extending well beyond the length of Vivio’s arm into a glaive. The pole itself was almost as long as Vivio’s body, the crescent shaped piece that curved along the top was just about as long as her forearm. The entire thing was a dark orange, not the most fearsome of colors but it would do, though Vivio had asked Falling Soul if he’d be kind enough to be ANY other color, of course he refused. Vivio’s barrier jacket soon followed. Dark gloves, almost like gauntlets, formed around her hands. Pitch black armor formed around her body like something out of a fantasy novel. The out fit was topped off by a heavy helmet. “Somehow,” Vivio’s voice echoed out of her helmet sounding like she was speaking from a cave, “this looked cooler in my head.” Zafira shook his head, his amused face creeping up, “This is why I told you to practice making a barrier jacket before putting it to use.” Vivio sighed as her helmet retreated into the form of a headband. Her armor then followed, sliming down to nothing more then creamy grey colored buttoned up light overcoat trimmed with silver. The coat didn’t button up completely, revealing the black pants underneath them. The gloves, however, stayed the same. “No skirt?” Zafira uncharacteristically teased. “That might be the first time I’ve seen a flying mage in pants.” There was truth in those words, the air force wasn't lovingly called the panty brigade for nothing. Vivio put her free hand on her hip, glaring at her guardian. “Do you want me to flash everyone?” Zafira shuddered, the idea clearly running through his mind, in horror, “No of course not.” He straightened up, his face retreating back to serious. “Now if you’re done we should see if there’s any information on recently stolen logia and—” “No thanks!” Vivio dived off the roof of the building they had been standing on. Like a typical teenager patience was not her strong point. “It’ll look important so we’ll know it!” “Vivio maybe you should try listening to your elders,” Zafira growled in mock annoyance and bounded after her, leaving the two unison devices to observe them. -- Vivio loved Cranagan. Of course it was natural to love and have pride in where one grew up but Vivio particularly loved her city. Ever since she had learned to fly (at age ten) Vivio had used her ability to explore the city. It was illegal of course and Zafira called it “a blatant disrespect for authoritative figures” but it was too fun for Vivio not to. Besides, it wasn’t like her flying hurt anyone. As Vivio bounced around the city’s rooftops she recalled the familiar feeling of being lighter than air. Vivio only half flew, she preferred to jump from roofs and glided to the next, not only was it more fun it used only half the mana if even. “Watch the road!” Zafira instructed from behind her. Of all the teachers Vivio had had, Zafira was by far one of the few she listened too, even if she never seemed to care what he said. Zaffy had always treated her the same, never like a child but rather like an equal. Uncle Yuuno was the same way and it was their tutoring that had made all her other teachers look like complete morons, in fact that was one of the reasons Vivio had dropped out of school. “I am!” Actually, no she hadn’t been but she wasn’t about to let him know that. “We’re looking for the truck!” Vivio rolled her eyes and looked back, “I know that!” Zafira’s eyes widened, a rare moment of panic showing on his face. “Vivio no roof!” “Huh?” Vivio looked down and realized she had just jumped into the air. “F-Falling Soul!” [Activating Arial Ace] Light orange energy wings popped out of Vivio’s back allowing her to slowly stop her fall.Vivio sighed in relief. Her heart hadn't beaten so fast in a long time. “Thanks Falling Soul.” [As long as you’re an idiot Vi, I’ll be here to save you.] Vivio glared at the device and contemplated throwing it away. “You know Raising Heart and Baridiche aren’t this noisy.” [Old timers like that are boring] “You heard Zafira.” [He has the nerve, you don't.] “Children!” Zafira barked out from above. “Eyes on the road!” Vivio turned and saw the thing they had been waiting for. Whoever had decided it was a good idea to leave the truck unmarked was a moron. The steel car stood out like a guy at a yaoi convention among the brightly colored cars on the highway. They might as well have written ‘suspicious vehicle’ on the truck’s side. Vivio and Zafira started to follow the truck as it rolled down the road at a rapid speed that was just pushing the limits of legal. “Looks like this is a job for that attack,” Vivio grinned like the Cheshire cat. [Sounds fun!] Vivio could almost hear the device’s excitement. Despite his complaints Vivio knew he was the only device she'd ever want to use. “Starlight!” Vivio started her attack. “Wait a minute!” Zafira sounded almost panicked, this day was full of unusual emotions for the wolf. “That attack is for emergencies only!” “Canon,” Vivio giggled as Zafira nearly fell out of the sky. Energy started to gather in the crescent’s hollow and Vivio moved to better prepare for the fall back. The sound of cartages being used up and falling to the ground filled the air. “Don’t do that again,” he paced in the air, trying to regain his stoic expression. “I wasn’t about to use breaker here.” [Ready] “Lock onto that truck,” Vivio commanded, all the while praying Falling Soul wouldn't find issue with her not saying please. [Locking…] [Locked] Vivio squared her feet and aimed her device right at the target. “And fire!” The energy burst out of Falling Soul, compressed into a ball. It rocketed towards the truck and hit it with enough force to take out a few walls at once. It took all Vivio had to keep it from shooting through the truck and destroying whatever was inside. The force as Vivio forced the ball to break apart was enough to knock her back into the building behind her. Vivio rubbed her head. Brick walls were rather hard and painful but she had to admit her barrier jacket had taken most of the damage. She looked up as the rubble from her attack settled. The truck had overturned, its side wide open. Its drivers, however, hadn’t emerged yet. “That was overkill,” Zafira motioned towards the wreckage. Smoke had started to rise up[ and the truck had not only overturned but skid so that it had treated the guardrail like it was nothing more than floppy pasta. “Heh,” Vivio chuckled nervously, “oops? I guess I’m just too strong.” Zafira started his usual lecture, “Perhaps magically but remember—” “—control is just as important as power. Uncle Yuuno says the same thing.” She had heard this a million times from both of the two men and every single member of family. “Then listen to it!” He shook his head, “Your mother and aunts caused more property damage in her youth then the entire air force combined could.” “I kinda have work to do,” Vivio pointed down, people had started to surround the truck, any longer and it'd be hard to get to the truck. “Then go the clock is ticking.” -- “Robots?” Vivio leaned into the truck’s window where two fried pieces of machinery were. They'd turned into the kind of things you'd find at the bottom of your oven. “That’s anti-climatic.” “You’re lucky then,” Zafira floated above her having finished scaring off unwanted onlookers, sometimes being a giant wolf came in handy. “But I can’t show off if there’s no one to fight,” Vivio hopped into the truck's hull. The items in it had scattered every which way. “That’s for the best.” Vivio shrugged. There wasn’t anything suspicious in the truck. In fact the contents of it were more like those of a moving van’s then a smuggler’s. She blinked and flicked a pair of panties to the side. “Are you sure this is the right truck?” “No,” Zafira grunted landing on the side of the truck's car. “You’re the one who smashed it without scanning its contents,” he pointed out. “I don’t even know what we’re looking for!” Vivio flailed her arms out, knocking over a box of clothes. “I thought you’d find it because it would ‘look important’,” if Vivio didn’t know Zafira better she would have said the wolf was mocking her. [You got mail Vi. ] A screen popped out of Falling Soul. Rein’s bright and cheery face soon appeared on it. “We found out what kind of Logia it’s supposed to be!” The unison device looked like she was about to burst from her excitement. “I’ll send the specs right now!” “Out of the way!” Agito violently pushed Rein out of the frame. “Okay this thing is gonna look crazy. But trust me it’s the real deal!” Their faces were replaced by an image. An image so unlost logiaish Vivio wouldn't have suspected it in a hundred thousand years. “You’ve got to be kidding me.” There was no way that was the Lost Logia they were looking for. Lost Logia were supposed to be deadly or at least shiny! “That’s what you’re after!” The miniature girl was getting as red as her hair. Though if it was out of anger or embarrassment at having to announce such a thing she couldn't tell. Vivio looked around the truck. The picture had been of a small, sloppy, handmade coffee mug. It looked like the kind a kindergarten kid would make for their parents; in fact Vivio vaguely remembered making a similar one for her mom. “We’ll never find it.” Rein and Agito ignored Vivio's cries,“Good luck and remember we’re watching!” “Better start looking,” Zafira ignored her question and motioned with his muzzle towards the contents of the truck. Vivio groaned and started to sift through the objects. -- “There is no way this thing is a Lost Logia.” After over an hour of searching Vivio had managed to find the mug, the mug that she was now twirling around in her hands despite the thing likely being worth her life several times over. “It just can’t be.” “You have to learn to accept things for what they are,” Zafira looked up from his position on the ground, where he had been taking a nap, with a yawn. “We leave finding that out to the people whose job it is to study the logia.” “But aren’t you even curious?” Vivio looked down at her guardian. “Not in the slightest.” Zafira had learned from years of service it was best not to know. Vivio sighed exasperatedly and held the mug up to the light. Logia were supposed to look important not like an art project. Vivio could make something that looked better. “Well that is a curious looking object.” Vivio let out a small shriek as the mug was lifted from her hands. It shouldn't have been possible too but Vivio had been careless and had let the thing hand loose. Vivio whirled around. “Give that back. This is official TSAB business.” The man tossed the Logia from hand to hand. At first glance he appeared to be floating in the air, but closer inspection revealed he was really balanced on what looked like a silver, mechanical tail coming out of his rear. He was a strange little man, almost like a monkey. He didn’t appear to be much taller then Vivio nor much more muscular. His ears were large and stuck out from the musty brown hair surrounding them. His blue eyes appeared amused with the situation. “It must be very important for them to send out a little girl, I mean I send out little girls for all my work.” That got Vivio. “If you won’t cooperate then you’ll force me to use magic.” She swung Falling Soul, fully intending to chop the head off the annoying man. The man bounced up using his tail as a spring, just missing getting whacked. “Now there’s no reason to be violent.” “Vivio are you alright?” Zafira jumped into the truck. “Who are you?” His fur bristled and he snarled at the sight of the monkey-man. It was obvious the only thing keeping him from springing on the guy were the years of protocol instilled in him. The question was processed for a moment before the answer came, “No one worth mentioning.” That was enough. Zafira let out a roar. Light blue spikes burst out of the ground. The monkey man was forced to dive out of the way to avoid them. “Surrender now and the force of the law will be minor.” “Sorry Bud,” he crossed his arms, the cup still dangling“But you better prepare to fight.” “Vivio leave this to me,” Zafira stepped out in front of the teenager. This was a job for a full time agent not a part-timer. Vivio didn’t argue, she was too busy trying to figure out how to fry the mug’s kidnapper. He hadn’t moved. It was like he was waiting for something. Zafira opened his jaw to call for more spikes but he was cut off as a pillar threw him into the air from below. “The hell!” He landed in a heap off to the side, though he quickly bounded back to his feet. Vivio couldn’t move, she couldn’t decide how to handle them; hell she had no clue how to handle them. “You’re late Niu,” The monkey-man twisted around to face the new attacker. “I already got it.” He waved the mug in the air. “Niu” stood up from his position kneeling on the ground. He was a giant, at least two feet taller then Vivio. He was muscular even more so than Zafira, hairy too. His brown hair was long, knotted and thick. It fell around his face and down his shoulders. The hair was continued by his thick beard and side burns. He wore a ragged old leather jacket and a dirty pair of jeans. He had a dull gaze like he was half asleep. He grunted, “Let’s go Hou.” He turned to leave. Zafira had other ideas. The wolf rammed himself into the back of the giant. Typically the furry battering ram managed to treat the strongest of men and building materials like they were naught but wet paper. However, the giant wasn’t even fazed, Zafira, on the other hand, looked pained. The giant grunted and gazed down, a stern look on his face, “Don’t hurt yourself, pup.” Zafira growled, the seniority Niu had assumed to have hit a chord inside him. He bound forward, calling up a bolder from the earth to smash into his opponent. “Well I suppose I'll take my leave,” “Hou” prepared to bounce on. “Hold it!” Vivio finally moved, lowering Falling Soul to Hou’s neck. Why she hadn’t thought of this earlier she wasn’t sure. Out of the corner of her eye Vivio could see that Zafira and Niu were engaged in combat. “You move and I slit your neck.” Hou smirked cockily and condescendingly,“You’re just a brat you don’t have the guts.” [Crescent Release.] Like hell she didn't. Falling Soul’s blade fired off. Her opponent managed to dodge it but not without letting it skim his ear, allowing it to make him lose his balance. He toppled to the floor, the mug skidding out of his hands and across the floor. Vivio dove for it, ignoring the fallen man. As soon as she had her hand around it she jumped back around, turning to face the stranger. To her horror she found not only had he got up but he had created a magic seal. For all her studying Vivio could not for the life of her recognize the form, she seemed to recall seeing it in one of her numerous books but it was obviously something she had taken no interest in. The magic color was light brown but that wasn’t what was odd. It was the squares that made up the seal that Vivio couldn’t comprehend. Mid style used circles, Belka triangles and while there were supposedly somewhere in the hundreds of different styles Vivio had never read of anyone practicing them on Mid-Childa particularly without a device. Deviceless magic was near unheard of and spontaneous at best. Vivio snapped to her senses just in time. [Guardrail] Vivio’s own orange seal sprung out from Falling Soul. The barrier popped up just in time to protect her from… a doll? No, not just a doll. The barrier protected her from a crate, a chair, a tea set, one of the guard robots, a kitchen sink and seemingly the entire contents of the truck each now embedded with powerful magic. Vivio’s barrier couldn’t hold out for long under that kind of constant attack. She focused, willing the barrier to hold out just a bit longer. To her surprise it did. It survived to the end of the attack. Hou looked surprised and just a bit panicked. Vivio dashed forward while he was stunned gripping both the now bladeless Falling Soul and the mug. She swung down aiming for his head, preparing to use her very powerful and very expensive to maintain device like an ordinary bat. In a frenzied last attempt to save himself he held his hands up, a barrier forming to protect himself from Vivio’s attack as he did. Vivio saw something that confused her greatly on his hands. Either drawn or tattooed onto his hands were seals, similar to the one he had used before. “Fall back,” he whimpered. Vivio gave him a strange look. What was he talking about? The sound of something rushing through the air hit her ears. “Shit!” Vivio cursed and threw out her hands just as a wave of objects flew at her and her barrier. The force flung her back and caused her to drop both her device and the Lost Logia. Hou moved fast, he had switched to his feet. He snatched up the mug and kicked Falling Soul into the corner. “Niu time to get out of here!” The giant grunted and pushed Zafira out of his way in the sky where the two had been fighting. Both looked worn though Zafira looked much worse, he'd gotten out of practice. In two bounds he made it to his partner. Vivio was helpless to stop them as the constant barrage of items had her flattened to the floor, her everything put into maintaining her shield. “See you later kiddo,” Hou grinned before Niu picked him up and disappeared into the sky, the attack ending with their disappearance. The barrage of items fell around Vivio. Vivio smacked the side of the truck, angry tears threatening to make her bawl. Her first mission was an utter failure. -- “Well that was an unexpected twist,” the man pressed the binoculars to his eyes. He was a small man, mousy, with a gentle, soft face and kindly features. He resembled a little ball of yarn, pudgy and squishy. His ginger hair fell over his face like a shield, hiding his thin rimmed glasses. A hint of silver poked out of the hair where his ears should have been. He was huddled on the roof of the office building, peering through the rings of the chain-link fence. “And a close call too.” “We had it under control Shu,” Hou stretched and tossed him the mug he had retrieved. “That kid was a newbie.” Behind him Niu grunted in agreement. “I don’t see why kitty wouldn’t help us though,” he shot a glance at the girl sitting on the roof with them. She glared at him, “Why do you care? You had it ‘under control’ didn’t you, Gregory?” She was a minute girl, she appeared dainty and delicate but her looks meant nothing in reality. Her cold red eyes told that. Her straight dark red hair reached to her shoulders though in the back it continued a slight bit more. She wore a girly pastel dress and sandals, she obviously had not ever considered joining in on the fight. “Do you really need a girl to bail you out?” He looked down, rubbing the side of his head with an embarrassed look, “I didn’t mean it like that Kitty…” “Why don’t we go home?” Shu suggested trying to break up the tension in the air. “I’m sure the others will be happy to see that…” he looked at the mug for a moment. “Whatever it is.” Hou nodded and grinned so wide it looked almost like he was all smile. “Sure.” “If that’s what you want Henry,” the girl shrugged. Shu sighed comically, “At least try to call us by our code names.” “Code names are annoyances. But this isn't the time,” She shrugged slightly, crossing her ankles, “Long said something important is going to happen tonight so we'd better hurry back for that too,” “Something important,” Hou raised a thin eyebrow. “Like what?” “You know I really could care less.” -- The Desert Planet, Likritta, The Rosemary Bar The planet Likritta was known for two things, sand and good drinks. Though it was likely it was the excess amounts of sand that made every drink that much better. Even though the planet was truly all desert it's native inhabitants were doing well for themselves. Their hardship filled lives ended as soon as the TSAB took over. Along with the agency came a new idea, casinos. The natives built up their little cities into metropolises of sin. When their lack of drinking age and numerous illegal activities made legal the desert was filled with tourists and the natives became filthy rich. However, the planet had recently come into a historical light. A drunk had wandered into the desert by mistake. When he was found he kept rambling on about the “weird ass rock” he'd found out there. When he brought out said rock it was found to be part of an ancient Belkan tablet. Immediately swarms of archaeologists flooded the area. Alas funding ran out and each group packed up their bags and left the drunken paradise. In the end only one group was left. This group received it's funding directly from the TSAB and the Saint Church. It had one more thing on its side, it was headed by the leading archaeologist in the field, Professor Yuuno Scrya. The famed professor had eagerly volunteered to go. However, several years later and little to show for it, moral was severely lower and the crew found themselves in bars more and more. The Rosemary was a personal favorite of Yuuno's. The bar was stationed in an old mud brick house that had been the owner's grandparents' home. It was always dark inside, regardless of the light out doors as the place was windowless, it had been designed so to keep out sandstorms. The small bar had a few tables but the bar itself was the place to be. The reason was in fact two men, the bartender and the owner. The bartender, a man known only as Kuhn, was a transplant from Mid-Childa. The blue haired man was famed for his honest tongue, juggling skills and utterly delicious drinks. He could gage the drunkenness of a man by looking at him. This was even more important when wandering off to the wrong place could leave you stranded. No one knew exactly what had drawn Kuhn there, some nights he claimed money, some nights he claimed a sense of adventure was what had dragged him there. The owner was twice as enigmatic. The gray haired, tan-skinned man was always at the bar, talking with his customers about everything but the man himself. Some believed he'd turned his ancestral home into a bar for the money, some believed it was in order to keep the old man company, either way the place was always packed. Yunno and his crew had taken over the bar for the night after lumbering their way into town. It was always a good thing for the locals when they did for Yuuno's workers tended to enjoy the towns pleasures. Yuuno and his closest assistants however headed right for The Rosemary. He had special reason to drink tonight given the nature of the letter in his hand. Dear Professor Scrya, We of the Belkan Board see fit to cut funding from you project due to the inaccurate nature of your findings... Yuuno didn't bother to reread further, he'd always known the bastards that were the Belkan Board would stand in his way at one point, what he hadn't known was the Saint Church had no choice but to follow them. The Belkan Board was a group of a dozen high profile and high paid, old blood Belkans, or so they claimed. They made their goal clear, they wanted to reestablish the Belkan Empire, with the assumption they would gain the positions of lords and nobles their ancestors had held. No one would care about the loonies' ramblings except they were dripping in money and everyone seemed to need it. Without their funding or the churches the TSAB's minimal funding wasn't going to help and their bullshit reasons didn't help. Yuuno knew very well why they were angry. Signs were pointing to this being the site of the ancient Belkan capital, that would put it far away from it's traditional place on the other side of Mid-Childa and would mean that the dark skinned natives of Likritta would be just as Belkan as them, if not more so. In fact it could prove that the so called “Belkan Nobles” were nothing more than their made up fantasies. This couldn't be allowed in their minds. So Yuuno drank as his funding headed down the drain. As did his young apprentice. Yuuno looked to the usually pleasant and content young man who now wore a sullen expression as he gazed into his drink, his forth actually. John Prius was typically a very rationale young man. He normally took great care to keep his mud colored hair neat and tidy. He always kept his wire framed glasses clean and he ensured that his clothes were free of all wrinkles. Unfortunately he had a tendency to feel very passionately about things and he was incapable of standing by while injustice took place. That was why the nearly six foot tall young man was hunched over and looking very tired. Yuuno was well aware this was mostly his own doing. “Maybe if I go to them myself,” John muttered, mostly to his drink. “They'll listen...” “No they won't boy,” the owner patted John on the shoulder. Although he didn't know who John was talking about he'd seen similar people in all the time. People were always coming in to get drunk and forget their problems but instead they always just managed to lose their common sense. “No one high up ever listens.” Yuuno half-heartily glared at the old man, “Please don't depress him more.” “Just telling him how the world works,” The owner shrugged and stood up, moving on to happier customers. “He can decide for himself,” Yuuno muttered incoherently. John was young and still naïve about how the world worked, and Yuuno wanted him to stay like that as long as he could. The longer John continued to believe justice would prevail the better. Yuuno wished he himself could go back to the days when Nanoha and the others had talked idealistic talk of changing the world. They'd seen a world full of flowers and rainbows, a world conspiring to help them. Now they saw nothing but thorns and thunderclouds and a world against them. “I'm going to go,” John pushed his empty glass around in little figure eights like a drunken ice skater. “I'll talk to the church...” Yuuno shook his head, patted John on the back and ordered him another drink. It was going to be a long night. -- The following morning The sun was excruciatingly bright to the hung over professor when he woke up. Yuuno wobbled out of his tent only to dive right back in. “I swear I'm never drinking again,” he grumbled the hung over man's false promise, he'd made it a hundred times over. It was as he buried his pounding head into his pillow that a piece of paper fluttered onto his head. With a grunt the archaeologist rolled over and picked it up, reading silently to himself. Dear Professor, Please forgive me but I've left to catch the first ride to Mid-Childa. When I return I promise I'll have acquired further funding so please hold on sir! Sincerely, John S. Prius Yuuno looked at the paper before groaning and covering his face with it, “John you moron!” Last edited by TheShinySword; 2008-11-15 at 22:08. |
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2008-11-15, 14:36
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Link #10990 |
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Master of the Shiny Crack
AuthorJoin Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a cave
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Spoiler for Chapter 1 Part 2:
The Border of the Mid-Childian dimension TSAB transport ships were notorious for being among the slowest ones in all the known dimensions. Unlike the giant warships that skipped across dimensions like they were playing hopscotch, the transport ships seemed to believe it'd best to let their passengers enjoy the scenery, on one side stars, on the other more stars. The dark abyss of space did nothing to entertain bored passengers and the knowledge that had they just used their own ship they would have made it to their destination much much faster was nearly maddening to most. This plagued one such passenger. Zen Skala had lost his patience for the ship his second day in, and he had spent the last six years drifting aimlessly through the edges of known territory on a ship. It wasn't that he minded seeing nothing but stars, stars and more stars. It was the knowledge that he had somewhere to be that was driving him up the walls. The sixteen year old had settled himself onto a windowsill large enough to hold him up. From there he stared out into the darkness that was space and brooded, a teen specialty. He had the proper look for a brooder too. His scruffy black hair was placed just right to look mysterious. His TSAB uniform was ruffled up but done just so that it looked purposeful on second glance. The distant look in his brown eyes and the blank look added to the ensemble. Even the way the five foot eight boy had positioned himself, one knee bent up, the other leg extended while looking dramatically out the window, seemed to have been chosen to add to his stoic bad boy look. “If you keep doing that your face'll get stuck like that.” The image was immediately shattered into a million bite-sized pieces. Life flooded the teen's face, his teeth clenched in a goofy snarl as he growled and snapped at the man who had invaded his bubble. “'Ey! I was brooding here!” “That's the problem with the youth of today, so dramatic,” an artful sigh was inserted to emphasize the point. “S-shut up!” A grin was his only response. The white headed man straightened back up. The lanky man's uniform gave away his rank as an admiral, but his smile displaced all stereotypes about the absolute seriousness of men of such a high rank. Though only thirty nine his hair had hit an early white, though it served to give him a more elegant look, only to have that look ruined by the way his face which seemed as though it was perpetually happy. There was a reason Akito Skala was known as the smiling wolf (there was also a reason why he was called a variety of colorful names not repeatable in polite society and the confirmed bachelor admiral in polite society). However, no matter how high ranked he never ceased to utterly embarrass his son. The moody teen crossed his arms and sat up. “If I'm dramatic what are you?” “I am,” Akito bowed grandly, like some noble from an ancient court, “The king, queen and court jester of drama.” “Of course you are,” Zen rolled his eyes, “When are we going to get there? I'm tired of this.” “Not tired enough to attempt to impress some of the girls on the ship,” Akito motioned for Zen to move his legs so Akito could sit down. He did and Akito plopped right down, folding his hands, resting his elbows on his knees and leaning on his palms. “I wasn't...” Zen trailed off, unable to think of a logical excuse for his actions. “You can't hide your attempts at seductions from your old man's eyes,” Another dramatic sigh passed through the admiral's mouth, “I thought I taught you better. Honestly, not all girls go for the bad boy look... don't use Sageo as a model and I can always show you some of my moves.” Zen didn't feel it'd be kind to point out that Sageo, Akito's lieutenant and best friend, was happily married while Akito remained single, as well as the fact that any tips from Akito would attract the entirely wrong types of people. Instead he chose to keep his mouth shut and also not mention he was perfectly fine at getting the ladies on his own. Akito reached over and clapped his son on the back. “But remember if you do-well you know,” he winked, “I have a box of c-” “I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THAT!” “I just want you to be careful.” “You send me off to fight dangerous criminals everyday!” Zen wanted this conversation to end as soon as possible. Akito rubbed his chin and nodded, looking for all the world like a wise old teacher,“A woman and a criminal aren't that different.” Wham! Zen punched the, luckily, very sturdy window, “Like hell they aren't!” He returned to crossing his arms. “If you're going to be my only company on this ship I'd rather spend the whole time asleep.” “Oh how cruel, denied by my own son.” Akito gripped his chest as if shot in the heart or suffering from heart burn. “Act your rank for once. Speaking of which,” Zen leaned back against the wall, “Can't you do something about the speed. Isn't there some sort of order you could give, claim it's a matter of dire importance of something?” “It doesn't work like that,” The admiral stood up, ruffling Zen's hair like one would a favorite pet's. “Now remember to be a good boy when we get there. Don't go angering any officers.” “You don't need to tell me,” Zen grumbled, “It's not like I go looking for trouble. I may hate the TSAB but I'm not about to make them my enemy.” He spoke as if he was talking about the weather. “Of course of course,” Akito waved his hand in the air, “Just humor your father.” “Does my father need to talk in third person?” “He likes it, it makes him feel special.” Zen groaned with utter exasperation, glad that no one was around to see. He shook his head and promised, “I won't anger anyone, I'll be a perfect little angel down there.” But as he looked through the window, the dim light that was Mid-Childa coming into view just barely, a separate thought ran through his head. 'Course even the angels had a rebellion. -- Gradies, Mid-Childa Desks were not meant to be clean. Truly, they were meant to have every last inch covered in paper upon paper, intended to be covered in a fine layer of dust and definitely expected to have many many coffee stains. Inspector Kaon Jin sat at her desk in her tiny apartment, resting her head among the papers and dust and coffee stains with a sigh and a fleeting thought that perhaps a clean up was in store. The inspector was utterly exhausted, not in the literal sense, as she hadn't actually been physically exhausted in a long while, but rather in the sense that she could not take her utter boredom anymore. The small girl had the body of one no older than twelve or so. She looked a bit like a female Jack Frost, or like someone had dumped her in a tub of bleach. Her hair looked as though a thousand spiders had made the white strands pulled back into a high and long pony tail. Though she looked at first glance to be only 12 or so, closer inspection revealed features no twelve year old would normally have. Her nose was crooked from where it had been broken several times and healed funny, the lobe of her right ear was slightly split from an arrow flying too close by, and though hidden mostly by her sleeves, hints of scars, looking like cracks in porcelain, peaked out. Her red eyes, a shade caught between tomato juice and blood, watched the open pages of a thick leather-bound book as if it would suddenly spring to life. She contemplated her options. She could continue on like the devout worshiper she had always pretended to be, and continue to be bored as hell or she could ignore the text and burn it like the devout knight she had also always pretended to be. Kaon sat up and scooted the book towards herself. It was a false religion night. She picked up the book and leaned into her office chair as she started to read to herself and the mice, as she had every other night. “Where hast My King gone? Thou art not here for thy land hast been stolen. Grant me thy power, O King of Man, Allow me to smite those who dare defile thy kingdom. If I alone remain thy servant, my worship shall not cease, it will only grow stronger as the ages march on. And if thy demands it I shall wait to the day of thy return. Return to thy throne My King, so the strangers will know their lord and that they are to be but thy servants.” With a gentle snap she shut the worn book. With a thump she placed it on the desk. “Heh. Stupid psalm, If it didn't work the first time why would it work the ten thousandth time. All this reading it boring. All this waiting is boring. Life is boring. If you could send me something to do I'd be quit-” Beep. Beep. Beep. The small object on the chain around her neck, resembling a clam shell, blinked red at her, like a spazing firetruck. Kaon removed it from her neck glaring at the device for interrupting her communion with... herself. A slight tap made the device open up a screen revealing a page of data sent by her superior. “Well will you look at that,” the inspector grinned as the specs of her new assignment revealed themselves. She looked up, half expecting to see the heavens but having to settle for a peeling once white but now yellow ceiling, “Maybe you really were a god Vivio.” -- Undisclosed location, Mid-Childa Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. “Does he do that all day?” The new guard looked worriedly at his senior. It was his first day on guard in that hall. Of course it was probably his last day too. Working that hall was considered a right of passage for new guards, a hazing of sorts. The guards who stayed there permanently were a brave lot indeed. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. “All day. Everyday.” The senior officer nodded solemnly his face devoid of emotion like it was chiseled that way in marble. “Since he got here.” Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. “How’d he get the ball?” The guard had been informed the prisoner was to have nothing at all. The other officer shrugged. “Someone gave it to him, some officer I think.. He gets visited quite often so it all blends together.” Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. “I didn’t know psychopaths had visitors,” he shook his head. The man in that room was insane, there was no denying that. If it weren’t for the TSAB’s no kill policy he would have been long dead, in his opinion he should have been anyway. However, for all his insanity, Jail was one of the most reasonable prisoners, TSAB officers often used him to help with their own cases, off the books of course. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. “Well they aren't exactly social calls.” The two guards fell into silence once again. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. “How can you listen to that all day?” It was bordering on maddening, with nothing else to focus of the sound was being drilled into the young guard's head. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. “You get used to it. I don’t even notice it.” The new guard stared at his superior in wonder, the noise was mind numbing but the older man truly seemed unaffected by it. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. Bounce. Catch. Throw. Thud. The pattern halted suddenly. The two guards turned towards the heavy, sealed, white door. No sound came from the room at all. With a gulp the new guard headed towards the door. He slide open the small slot that was the room’s only access to the outside world. A chill passed over the young guard as he saw him. Ten years of solitary confinement had caused his hair to grow even more unruly then it had been before. It had let a beard grow on his face as well. But the beard had grown on a skeleton. Jail was a mere fragment of what he had been, literally, his prisoner's uniform threatened to fall off. “Hey something wrong in there?” Looking into that room scared the hell out of the guard. It was pure white except for the hair of the prisoner and the blob on the ground. “My ball,” the voice didn’t match the body it was coming out of. This voice was lyrical and pleasant, unchanged by time. “It seems to have broken,” he looked up through his mane of purple locks, his yellow eyes not unlike a cat's in the night. The guard looked down at the dark blob on the ground. Closer inspection revealed that it was nothing more then a handball that had split directly in half, his ball truly had broken, though he had no idea how that would manage to happen. “I can’t get it,” Jail shrugged and pointed to the shackles on his feet. The guard eyed him for a minute, as if that would help him tell if Jail would keep still, before reaching for his keys and starting to unlock the door. “Thank you so much,” Jail smiled and for a second the guard couldn’t see how this man could be the lunatic who tried to take over the TSAB. He swung open the door, “You know you’re not getting another on-” The guard promptly passed out as he took a whiff of the air. “Don’t worry it’s not poisonous just a very heavy knock out gas, took me years to become immune,” The man chuckled, all people were fools, no exceptions. The senior guard slid into the doorway but soon fell to the same fate as his partner. “You really ought to have a better ventilation system,” he pointed out from his seat. He stood, despite what they thought and what he led them to believe he had become quite skilled at standing with them on. “Quattro you can come out now.” Managing to get Quattro transferred in next to him had taken much negotiating, but it'd paid off. Boom! An explosion rocked the facility. He smiled in satisfaction as debris flew past him, smashing into the walls and windows. “Lovely.” The combat cyborg rose out of the now settling dust. She tossed a small ball up and down in hand, a bomb similar to the one she had used to blow up her cell. “Doctor it’s so wonderful to see you again.” She giggled as she picked up the dropped pair of keys. “Did that kind old man give you that toy?” She bent over and unlocked his shackles. He took a few wobbly steps forward before regaining his smooth steps. “Our beneficiary is quite kind.” He spied something out of place. “He even left a gift,” On the table a pile of clothes had been left along with a razor and a smooth white mask. He quickly shaved and changed clothes, a feeling of wholeness coming back over him as he slipped on a lab coat. “Quattro I think it’s time to pay him a visit.” “Yes doctor. Tee hee.” He flipped the mask in his hand. Its red eyes looked up at him, telling him it was time now. A smile curled onto his lips as recognition filled him. With a single motion he fashioned the ancient mask onto his face. “In fact we should visit all our old friends,” He cackled, his laughter filling the halls and teasing the guards just beyond the doorway who were trying in vain to reach him but wouldn't make it in time. “After all, someone needs to tell them that Jail Scaglietti is back.” To help keep everything straight here's a little Character guide (Mainly for OCs but a few CCs are thrown in to keep what they've been doing for the last 10 years straight. Spoiler for Character Guide:
Vivio Takamachi: Daughter of Nanoha Takamachi, known by some as the baby devil for her lack of control and tendency to go all out all the time. Currently working part time for the TSAB. Hou: Man with a mechanical tail, practitioner of an unknown magic style. Real name Gregory. Niu: Giant man of abnormal strength and durability. Shu: Small mouse of a man, in charge of technology for his group. Real name Henry Mao (Aka Kitty): A fifteen year old girl working with the above for unknown reasons. Yuuno: Famed professor of archeology and head librarian of the Infinite Library. Formerly Vivio's teacher. Currently on a dig in Likritta. John S. Prius: Yuuno's apprentice of six years and a mage. Currently heading to Mid-Childa to find funding for the dig. Zen Skala: Adopted son of Admiral Akito Skala. Headed to Mid-Childa to assist someone there. Admiral Akito Skala: Head of the ship the Koso. Is in charge of protecting the borders of known territory. Headed to Mid-Childa to assist someone there. Kaon Jin: Inspector for the TSAB. Seems to be a follower of the Belkan religion despite disliking it. Looks like a twelve year old. Jail Scaglietti: Criminal mastermind. Has escaped and is leaving to meet up with his benefactor. Spoiler for Author's notes:
Long chapter is long @.@ I don't like having to post in two separate posts but I had no choice. I've always hated long exposition and yet I used it right off the bat ^^;; hopefully that will be the last time I have to do such a thing. I considered not having it and leaving the information about the state of the TSAB for later but I felt the story would make more sense if the reader knew it off the bat as most of the characters also already know it all. The main OCs are all now introduced much much earlier (Kaon was originally going to appear in Chapter five) and John and Zen have been completely reworked so John is no longer Yuuno 2.0 and Zen is no longer a giant douchebag (still a little one though ). Akito Skala has also been given a larger role mostly because I like him and I don't want to make up more OCs than needed. Most of the major OCs will be introduced within the next two chapters. The chapters also should (hopefully ^^;; ) be shorter than this one. This is the lengthiest chapter to date, it's also now chapter 1 instead of the prologue. Finally thank you very much for reading through all this and I hope you enjoy RebelS |
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2008-11-15, 16:34
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Link #10991 | |
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Undercover Mole
Graphic Designer
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: ~Floating on the edge
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 The last line just did it for me. Anyway, Welcome! I'm sure you're used to our weird ways by now. Everything you might possibly need is under Satashi's signature. Quote:
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Well I'm glad to see RebelS up and running again.
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2008-11-15, 17:04
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Link #10992 |
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Even if it just for a bit
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Cold Storage
Age: 32
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@TSS: Dont make me a rebel zombie ya hear me, dont make me a rebel zombie. I kinda like the long chapters, makes me procastinate more... i mean its more material to read. And A=4 B=3 A sword must be found to the enemy attack... if there is one that is.
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2008-11-15, 19:28
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Link #10993 |
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The Interstellar Medium
Author
Join Date: May 2008
Location: [SWE]
Age: 34
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So, more random ideas for True Lies. Not a preview, not even an excerpt, just hints or ideas I might drop now and then to chew on. Hope you don't mind.
Spoiler for True Lies random:
Some said it was the virus. Others said armageddon as near. They were both right.
The population had been infected and quickly declined in numbers. Society fell apart, the economy broke and tragedy was everywhere. The lucky ones who were immune to the virus were killed by those infected instead. Some managed to flee and establish a new society, hidden from the rest. If they were ever found out, they would get destroyed yet again. What would they do? What was their chances? No one knew and no one still knows. All that is fact, is that Havoc is law.
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2008-11-15, 19:37
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Link #10994 |
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"Begin, the operation!"
Author
Join Date: Oct 2007
Age: 36
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Nice AX...
...now my turn. "I am all that is. I am all that is not. Everything dances to what I command it to. I am the Dweller of Darkness, the Color out of Space, the Watcher in the Mist. Who am I? I am Deathwing... Deathwing the DESTROYER! "And she...? She is my Aspect. She is my daughter. She is... Keroko Georashi." Black Order Chronicle: Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha - Chapter 00: Watashi Wa... Keroko Georashi http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4507818/...he_Black_Order Note: That link might die soon. If it does, I will relink. Beta'd by no one yet cause Tempest is busy. Spoiler for Preview:
Keroko returned to that park and found that the gang of bullies, and quickly realized what a mistake she had made; simply put, there was no way that she could possibly hope to fight these people and hope to live. They were bigger, tougher, and meaner than her by a long shot. But that upswelling of anger that she felt as she watched the Big Kids pick on the Little Kids began to push her. Her impulses got the best of her, and she found herself marching toward them with all the anger a five year old could muster and getting up in the Big Kids’ faces before her logic caught up. “I told you once before!” She shouted at them, point-blank. “I will protect these kids! You will not hurt them as long as I’m here!” She made an angry sound and balled her fists. “Get away from here!” The kids laughed. “Oh, so the little girl is here to be the big bad defender, huh?” One of the kids laughed again. “What is it that you could possibly-” There was a red flash that blinded everyone in the area, and when the light cleared, the one taunting Keroko lay on the ground, unconscious. A period of deafening silence filled the air as Keroko gasped, took a full step backward, and stared down at the gaping hole in the boy’s shirt. The skin underneath was blackened but unhurt otherwise, and a static feeling in the air caused hairs to stand on end. Keroko, unable to even comprehend what she had just done, fell to her knees, staring. Likewise, all eyes present turned to look at the girl, mere fractions of a second too late to notice the tell-tale sign of a magic sigil disappearing into the ethereal space betwixt dimensions to know that, not for the first time in her life, Keroko Georashi had cast a spell. Indistinct murmurs arose as both the Big and the Little Kids backed away from the red-headed girl, the Big ones dragging their friend away, and left her alone. In the future, this exposure to magic would be something that would be scarred into these children’s minds, but to Keroko, it would only be the start of something that would lead her to something else entirely...
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2008-11-15, 21:55
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Link #10995 |
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Beta by Accident
Author
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Maine
Age: 52
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Spoiler for This will be a loooong, probably incoherent rant with a review at the end.:
Okay...
*sigh* I'll start with a disclaimer: I'm not 100% sure that I'm really crabby about what I'm about to say, or if I'm just P.O.ed that you're starting over and that therefore getting to the next update off the end of the story will take all that much longer. So, y'know, get the salt shaker out and take this with a few grains. But. The prologue stinks, from a plot perspective. I know, you're trying to set forth a shift of the TSAB governing body into Darker and Edger territory, and I love a good political conspiracy as much as the next guy, but the bottom line is, this could not have happened this way. Not with the way you've proceeded to start the story itself. That is, the TSAB launched a brutal, bloodthirsty war of conquest on Earth (well, and everywhere else as well, but that's not really relevant to my complaints) which resulted in heavy violence on both sides, and apparently Nanoha and Hayate...didn't give a damn? 'Cause there they are, still embedded freely in the TSAB's military structure, pursuing their careers, happily raising their families (well, if you count the Wolkenritter as a family...). Not only didn't they rise up in epic revolt, but they also didn't even object loudly enough to hurt their career plans or create lasting psychological scars to bug Vivio? Honestly, I can see how someone might not be willing to join The Rebellion in a likely-to-be-ultimately-futile conquest, but Hayate is still on the Now-Suddenly-An-Evil-Empire's payroll in an administrative position? The violent takeover of her home world out of sheer greed for power, the wanton slaughter of assorted countryfolk and possibly friends and family, and the accompanying firm establishment of the fact that the TSAB is now a Genuine Force of Evil wasn't even enough to motivate her to quit her freaking job? Incidentally, the way you've set up the government doesn't work either. Veto power (particularly if a society is stupid enough to allow it to exist without the ability to override it in some way) is a potent way to castrate a legislative body, but conversely the Adminstration Act, as you explain it, would have to be passed by that legislative body. If Hunter was given the ability to both veto legislation and create it by edict, that makes him a dictator, and while it's certainly reasonable to believe that a dictatorship could rise out of a chaotic situation, it's not reasonable to believe that somehow a constitution which openly provides for dictatorial powers could be snuck under the noses of a party which exists for the sole purpose of supporting rule by a non-dictatorship. So...um...I hate to say this, but my advice is to take a red pen, draw a big X through the first six paragraphs, and start over. Honestly, the actual chapters don't present anything resembling the kind of major societal upheaval that the prologue represents, so I'd strongly suggest stepping back, ramping it down, and starting that backstory part over. Remember, too, that if you turn the TSAB into a heavy-handed totalitarian, warmongering state that there will be an inevitable impact on its citizens in daily life (the kind of state that imposes its will by violence on all foreign nations it encounters simply cannot run its internal society on the peaceful, basically "good" basis that you present), and through the many chapters of your original version as well as the revised chapter here, you--rightly, in my opinion--do not present that. Actually, I'll boil it down into one sentence: Vivio is too much of an innocent naif to have grown up in Stalinist Russia. (I was going to say "Nazi Germany" but not only didn't I want to Godwin's Law my own review but it isn't accurate; you didn't present the TSAB as having an ethnic or cultural bias anyway but just as power-hungry imperialists. You could almost get away with a parallel to the European powers as they expanded their global empires from the 15th-mid-20th centuries, but the sociocultural biases don't exist within the TSAB since it's already a multicultural federation of a wide variety of cultures and groups...which, incidentally, is the major objection to a "we've turned into imperialist nutbars" agenda anyway). And remember, you can do a story where the heroes rebel against sociopolitical authority without having to make that authority an over-the-top, cartoonish evil. If you're American, I'd suggest looking at, for example, McCarthyism in the 1950s (or, as some cynics would say, the George W. Bush years), or the pre-Civil War tensions over slavery and states' rights in the 1840s-1850s, or the tensions during the Vietnam War for examples of how a society rooted in basically good intentions can nonetheless have elements of it take a sharp wrong turn in practice in such a way as to affect, harshly and dramatically, many lives--perhaps even demanding the action of heroes to correct. Other nations have had their own moments, of course, but that's just a smattering from a U.S. point of view; I don't want to turn this into a political discussion over what constitutes justified versus unjustified actions by different nations and cultures! *sigh* Okay, that takes us up to paragraph seven. And the good news is, once the story itself starts, you're doing fine. I like Vivio, Falling Soul, and their interactions with Zaffy. The opposition is better fleshed-out and presented than in your original version. I like that you're introducing the OCs earlier (though the physical description of Kaon Jin seems a little forced, given that the scene is a one-person one from her POV--I have a suggestion for that, btw; PM me if you want my advice...on the other hand, you may prefer that after my rant on your prologue to delete me from your "friends" list and toss any printouts of my work into the nearest wood stove...) and making Zen...well, less Zen-like. So...yeah, I'll keep right on reading more, but I'd really advise tightening up that historical backstory into something that works better with the way you've expressed the fic itself, because the fic is quite good reading and doesn't deserve to get bogged down by the weight of its own background. |
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2008-11-15, 22:07
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Link #10996 |
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Master of the Shiny Crack
AuthorJoin Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a cave
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Don't worry about me hating you over your rant (and I don't think there's a thing you could do to make me stop reading your work  ). It was definitely needed so I can't truely say anything but thank you. I was uneasy over it myself and you only confirmed my inner worries. To be honest I feel relieved ^^;;;
Last edited by TheShinySword; 2008-11-15 at 22:20. |
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2008-11-16, 17:49
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Link #10997 | |||
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[. . .]
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Imaginary World no. 856
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Wow, seems like I missed quite some storm. >< Oh well, it's best to let sleeping dogs lie. Moving on.
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Happy Nightmare looks crazy. Quote:
 Random thing I noticed: to me it looks like the pencil drawings (like the one with BattleArmor!Jail are a lot cleaner/detailed than the ballpoint pen(?) NROTU ones. I don't know, it just looks better. Quote:
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It's good to see it back, Falling Soul is win as always and Zen seemed a lot more likeable than I recalled, while Admiral Skala seemed a lot funnier.
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2008-11-16, 18:05
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Link #10998 | |
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The Interstellar Medium
Author
Join Date: May 2008
Location: [SWE]
Age: 34
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HAVOC, the ruthless virus of True Lies. How did it come into existence? What is the result? Leaving people in despair, this is one of the stories left behind for those seeking the thruth.
A lie is not a lie, if it is true for the one doing the deed. Spoiler for A little Short:
"Mommy, why are we playing hide-and-seek?," the little girl asked.
"Shh, hun. Please be quiet for mommy, ok?" The little girl nodded and smiled at her mother. She sat down on the floor in the closet and took a peek through a little hole in the closet door. The man outside was still throwing things around him, chopping into the furniture with an axe. It's metallic end glimmed in the morning sun that was just rising outside the windows. "Where are you? Monster! Come back here, I know you are here somewhere!" he screamed and got more furious by the second. He was sweaty and his shirt was stained with blood from previous victims that had fallen to his crusade. A crusade, that only existed in his mind. Devils had to be exterminated and it was his duty to fullfill it. Devils, everywhere. The girl's mother put her hand on her daughter's head and stroked her hair. So small. So innocent. The girl looked up and smiled, her yellow hair turning in slow-motion. "We will be okay mommy. He will leave us alone, I'm sure of that." A single tear fell from her mother's cheek which she wiped off. "I'm sure he will, hun." With a roar the man swinged his axe through the air again and latched itself onto a chair. Driven by pure rage, he took a more firmer hold of the axe's handle and swinged it, chair and all towards the closet. It hit the closet head-on and threw it's occupants off balance. The door swinged open and mother and daughter tumbled out of it, hitting the floor hard. Silence ensued, as the man stared at the two. "I've found you," he said in a calm and low voice. "Time to die." "Run!" the mother screamed and pushed her daughter away from her. The little girl looked confused and stopped for a moment, eyeing the scene. Her mother rose to her feet and threw herself at the man, thinking she could provide some time for her daughter to escape. Axe met flesh. She had tripped on a piece of chopped furniture and lost momentum. Tumbling towards the man, he rose his axe and hit the mother straight in the forehead. It cleaved her skull, deep into her brain, blood erupting from the gaping hole. She fell to the floor with her eyes open in surprise at her sudden death. Her daughter was paralyzed in the middle of the room, just staring. The man picked up the bloody axe and walked towards her, sunlight making him only a shadow. A single word escaped the girl's lips; "Papa.." With one more swing with his axe, the girls head got loose. Blood showered him and he watched the body falling into a heap on the floor. The blood continued to pump out of the girls neck and quickly colored the area where she lay red. The man heaved his axe onto his shoulder and picked forth a note from his pocket. With a piece of charcoal, he scribbled down a few notes and then left the room in silence, leaving his wife and daughter staring at each other with empty eyes. == === == === Quote:
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2008-11-16, 18:07
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Link #10999 | |
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Undercover Mole
Graphic Designer
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: ~Floating on the edge
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[EDIT] That was really gruesome AX, REALLY. Now how does this all fit together? Quote:
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2008-11-16, 18:59
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Link #11000 | |
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[. . .]
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Imaginary World no. 856
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How about some classics? A quick done short to please the angry plot bunnies. for now...Spoiler for short text:
Two bright lights clashed in the distance sending vibrating sounds around the cold metal corridors. Two figures approached and crossed blades, before retreating in their defensive stances. Yellow met red. Red met yellow. The sound of swirling blades echoed through the void beneath them. "It is useless to resist." The purple clad man spoke calmly. He was wearing large dark purple armour and his head was covered by a matching coloured mask. His opponent didn't answer. Her concentration was at keeping her ground against the assaulter. One ill-matched move and she was on her rear, the red blade at her throat. With much effort she brought her own yellow blade against the crimson threat and deflected it. Her whole body was weary, but she forced it to stand up and defend against her enemy. The man effortlessly parried her every move and counter-attacked without any difficulty. A few steps later he had her pinned against the edge of the platform. The woman tried deflecting the blow, but it was too late. The blood coloured blade passed through flesh and her right hand tumbled down into the abyss below. She let out a pained scream and almost collapsed. "Join me. Our combined strength can end this conflict! We can bring order to the galaxy!" the man moved his hand towards his defenceless opponent in an offering motion. "No." She spoke slowly, body stiff from pain. She was already standing at the farthest point of the platform, no place left to go to. If he would not have had his head covered, one would say that the man had chuckled. "Fate... I am your father!" She couldn't believe her ears. "No. No. That can't be!" "Come with me. It is the only way!" Fate stared for less than a second at the man in front of her, Jail Scaglietti... and then let go of the pillar she was holding herself to.
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authorshipping, befriending, fanfiction, interactive fanfiction, nanoha  |
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