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Old 2009-11-03, 14:36   Link #2101
0utf0xZer0
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Crusader View Post
I value all of my female friends, but it's ruined at least one friendship. I told her how I felt, but it was super akward for both of us and the last time we were together there was a bunch of akward silences, and it as never been the same for us.
Did she ever have a chance to really explain her feelings on the matter to you?

The only time I've confessed to a girl, she had enough trouble coming up with a response that I simply changed the subject after a bit just to save us the awkwardness. I then let her organize her thoughts - basically that she didn't feel she knew me that well yet - via e-mail. Seemed to do the trick because she actually seemed more comfortable around me last time we met than prior to the confession, although that may have just been because there were less people she didn't know around than where I'd met her previously.
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Old 2009-11-03, 15:25   Link #2102
Narona
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Originally Posted by Ascaloth View Post
LOL something like that, though I would also include the chance that she would reject me gracefully without resorting to violence. Of course, granted that stealing kisses is a particularly bold tactic (nominee for understatement of the year? ), one might think the chances of a girl rejecting a guy who did that without slapping him might be rather low.


Quote:
She's getting stressed over her schoolwork the last few days. What are the things I can do to help her get over this tough period? :3
Let her know that if she needs to talk, you'll be there for her.

She doesn't work all the time, does she? You could organize a date in which she could have fun and relieve from her stress. A picnic, or if you have a bit more money, an afternoon in a place like an amusement park or something like that
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Old 2009-11-03, 19:56   Link #2103
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ascaloth View Post
Anyway, talking about the girl, update on my situation:

She's getting stressed over her schoolwork the last few days. What are the things I can do to help her get over this tough period? :3
I can work some times, but have you ever offered to help her on her work? Sometimes it can get overwhelming and an extra hand or mind could ease some of the stress.
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Old 2009-11-03, 20:19   Link #2104
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Crusader View Post
I can work some times, but have you ever offered to help her on her work? Sometimes it can get overwhelming and an extra hand or mind could ease some of the stress.
That depends usually on how much you know the work you want to help her with. Trying to do that might be more of a hinderance if you don't understand it.
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Old 2009-11-03, 23:23   Link #2105
Ascaloth
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Originally Posted by Dextro View Post
I would say give her time and space to finish whatever she needs to finish but be present if she needs to talk, let out steam or just go out to unwind and wants your company. I find that when people are stressed one should let them cool off and if you try to be too pro-active you might just stress the person even more.
Hmmm, alright. I'll keep that in mind. Thanks.

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Originally Posted by Narona View Post
Let her know that if she needs to talk, you'll be there for her.

She doesn't work all the time, does she? You could organize a date in which she could have fun and relieve from her stress. A picnic, or if you have a bit more money, an afternoon in a place like an amusement park or something like that
Already did that; we went to watch MJ last Friday night (and get some alone time while at it. ), and we have a date for a Maksim concert coming up. I'm not sure what else we can do though, since our schedules are kind of in the way.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Crusader View Post
I can work some times, but have you ever offered to help her on her work? Sometimes it can get overwhelming and an extra hand or mind could ease some of the stress.
Did that last night too, helped her make adjustments to her English in her essay. Unfortunately, since she's studying a different major from me, and that the bulk of her problems is that her assignments is getting in the way of her studying French, there's precious little I can do since I don't know French or Vietnamese.
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Old 2009-11-03, 23:37   Link #2106
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Did that last night too, helped her make adjustments to her English in her essay. Unfortunately, since she's studying a different major from me, and that the bulk of her problems is that her assignments is getting in the way of her studying French, there's precious little I can do since I don't know French or Vietnamese.
What is her major to have problems with French and Vietnamese at the same time?
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Old 2009-11-03, 23:45   Link #2107
Ascaloth
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Originally Posted by Cinocard View Post
What is her major to have problems with French and Vietnamese at the same time?
No no.....her native language is Vietnamese. She knows some English but has to translate Vietnamese to English in her mind, and she's also studying French in the meantime. So the problem is, she has a crapload of essays to be written in English that she has trouble translating from her native language, and it is these assignments that is preventing her from studying for her French.

But, eh. Not like you needed to know that much.
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Old 2009-11-04, 22:32   Link #2108
Timdog
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Originally Posted by Narona View Post

Explain? Is it because you have a particular girl in mind, or are you just driven by hormones? Be careful to not see girls as object you just want to "touch"
Both right now. I have a particular girl in mind (one of my close friends) and in general I just can't stop thinking about them. It really is an obsession right now and literally 95% of my thoughts are directed towards girls. Even when I'm focusing on my school studies, I still have these thoughts all the time.
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Old 2009-11-05, 09:40   Link #2109
Narona
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Originally Posted by Timdog View Post
Both right now. I have a particular girl in mind (one of my close friends) and in general I just can't stop thinking about them. It really is an obsession right now and literally 95% of my thoughts are directed towards girls. Even when I'm focusing on my school studies, I still have these thoughts all the time.
All depends on what you expect from the girls. Just don't forget that there are human too, with feelings and all. Even if many girls from the young generations are more open to short relationships, most of them also think that the presence of sincere feelings are important (well, it was a french study, maybe the US girls are different XD )

If you want to just spend a one night stand with a girl, then... why not going to the red light district?

Joking aside, on the opposite, if you seek a relationship with a girl (short or long lasting), try to think with your head first, and not only with your pants XD I know it's easy to say, but don't let your common sense being too much blurred by your hormonal needs.
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Old 2009-11-05, 10:49   Link #2110
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Like Narona said, think with your head. It isn't a problem to always have girls on the mind, but when you actually want to take the time to develop a relationship, make sure your head is clear and you know what you're getting into.

Also, don't let your needs mess up your priorities. Girls may be a great part of life (), but they aren't all there is to life.
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Old 2009-11-05, 12:44   Link #2111
Kakashi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Timdog View Post
Both right now. I have a particular girl in mind (one of my close friends) and in general I just can't stop thinking about them. It really is an obsession right now and literally 95% of my thoughts are directed towards girls. Even when I'm focusing on my school studies, I still have these thoughts all the time.
I can only see two options here, you either occupy yourself with something that will help you forget about girls (and therefore decrease your average time spent obsessing over them ), or you cut straight to the root of the problem and ask a girl out.

If you're more wanting to do the former, my advice would be to get engrossed in something which you don't associate girls with. The only thing I can think of would be sport, but try something other than studying. Studying will hardly put to rest all the testosterone you're feeling right now.
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Old 2009-11-05, 20:26   Link #2112
Haladflire65
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I have a question! Several, actually.

So once me and a guy friend (NOT boyfriend) of mine went out together (just the two of us) to play soccer, basketball and buy ice cream. This guy's a year yonger than me; I met him i martial arts class, and he confessed to me a while later. But we agreed that we wouldn't be 'girlfriend and boyfriend' because, well, we felt that would be akward. We were only like, 14 and 13. Would that little outing that I mentioned above be pretty much a date? And is there anything 'bad' about going out with a guy younger than you?

I haven't seen this person for a year... We're still e-mailing, though. Is this a good sign? Do you think you can see any development in our relationship (just friends, really) in the future? Or is it just, well, just something teeagers always have?
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Old 2009-11-05, 21:07   Link #2113
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It depends on how you define a date, to be honest. For me, it isn't a date unless I'm asked out by the guy or I ask the guy out myself; otherwise, I just assume I'm having a nice day with a guy friend. Incidentally, I don't see a problem with him being younger than you, since it isn't a major age difference and you both seem to be good friends.

Keeping in contact with someone is always a good thing regardless of what the future is. ^^ As for development, well, that's entirely up to you. You certainly have the option of dating him at this point, since you know he already likes you and I'm assuming that hasn't changed recently. As for what you mean by 'something teenagers always have', I don't follow, sorry.
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Old 2009-11-05, 21:11   Link #2114
cheyannew
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Originally Posted by Haladflire65 View Post
I have a question! Several, actually.

So once me and a guy friend (NOT boyfriend) of mine went out together (just the two of us) to play soccer, basketball and buy ice cream. This guy's a year yonger than me; I met him i martial arts class, and he confessed to me a while later. But we agreed that we wouldn't be 'girlfriend and boyfriend' because, well, we felt that would be akward. We were only like, 14 and 13. Would that little outing that I mentioned above be pretty much a date? And is there anything 'bad' about going out with a guy younger than you?

I haven't seen this person for a year... We're still e-mailing, though. Is this a good sign? Do you think you can see any development in our relationship (just friends, really) in the future? Or is it just, well, just something teeagers always have?
My ex-hubby was 2 years younger than me, and I'm 7 yrs younger than my hubby, so *shrug* I never really considered age differences.

and it may've been a date or may've just been hanging out; depends on how you both define it
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Old 2009-11-05, 21:47   Link #2115
Haladflire65
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Yeah, I told a few friends about it and they were all like, 'oooh!' lol. So I was assuming most people saw it as a date... I didn't really feel that way, though.

And another thing is that he moved away from my hometown, which I'm going to visit every holiday because I'm in a boarding school, so we haven't met for a while. I'm not sure if we would be able to in the near future. I really do like him, but if we can't even see each other...
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Old 2009-11-05, 21:57   Link #2116
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A long distance relationship can work, but it takes a lot of time and effort. It's hard, but if you really like him and want to be with him, I'm sure you can find a way.
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Old 2009-11-06, 23:36   Link #2117
UltimaWolf
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So we officially broke up today...bleh
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Old 2009-11-07, 00:05   Link #2118
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So we officially broke up today...bleh
I'm sorry to hear that. How are you holding up?
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Old 2009-11-07, 04:22   Link #2119
0utf0xZer0
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Join Date: Oct 2006
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Haladflire65 View Post
So once me and a guy friend (NOT boyfriend) of mine went out together (just the two of us) to play soccer, basketball and buy ice cream. This guy's a year yonger than me; I met him i martial arts class, and he confessed to me a while later. But we agreed that we wouldn't be 'girlfriend and boyfriend' because, well, we felt that would be akward. We were only like, 14 and 13. Would that little outing that I mentioned above be pretty much a date? And is there anything 'bad' about going out with a guy younger than you?
Let's discuss the age thing first. I've been criticized, albeit by only one person, for saying I was going to confess to a girl four years younger than me. I think you need to ask yourself the same question that I asked him in reply: who is going to be harmed by it? Given how small the age gap between you two is, I'm guessing the answer is "no one".

Really, I think you're stressing out about things that don't actually matter that much. Whether or not it was a date is really just a matter of semantics and plenty of girls have younger boyfriends, it's just less common than the opposite because girls mature slightly faster. The distance factor is what you really need to be thinking about.
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Old 2009-11-07, 12:10   Link #2120
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Originally Posted by 0utf0xZer0 View Post
plenty of girls have younger boyfriends.
Heck, currently my best friend is eighteen and she's dating a sixteen-year old. ^^;; Granted, I don't approve of the relationship, but that's another story for another day. >>;;
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