Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha Character Creation and Discussion

[Keroko]

Originally Posted by LoweGear

As do I <_>

Yup, which is why their opinions both get along soooo well

I can imagine. Common hatred creates bonds.

Originally Posted by Tormenk

Actually Tk did post here awhile ago. The two posts was his h4xbuster opinion on ATC's stuff, putting it mildly. A mod deleted both for being pointless and off-topic. What's left of the original two posts are bits and pieces quoted by me Aaron and Wild Goose about other stuff.

Hence why we point too detailed technobable to the tech thread these days.

Originally Posted by Tormenk

I had the impression Ancient Belka style had a lot of norse influence in general and brought it over to fanon as well.

With the wolkies and all the blatant norse names tossed around, its not a matter of 'impression' Seriously, Ragnarok Breaker, need you get more obvious?

Originally Posted by Kha

Cheap, MILFy, but nonetheless.

*runs*

Nothin wrong with MILF, though.

Originally Posted by Kha

I'm trying to get Arisa and Suzuka off-planet and I decided that magic can let people travel, I'm sure super-riches coupled with knowledge of the TSAB can grease their way through the Movements Investigation Bureau (MIB).

.... Okay, so why go through all the pain of creating the very unbelievable 'robot tading grandfather' while you have a blatantly obvious (so obvious that even we are wondering why Seven Arcs didn't use it) option available? Just let them tag along with Nanoha & Co.

Originally Posted by Kha

Talk about da payne...

Pain? hardly.

Originally Posted by XenahortCharybdis

4. Write nothing that attempts to incorporate elements of modern heavy automatic machinery into anything more powerful than the average generic magic device.

That's a smart one to follow. Even though its a magical weapon (and hence, obviously should function differently) some people here are still conviced they are subject to the exact same advantages and disadvantages of their normal counterparts.

Originally Posted by Sheba

First try on a OC, it took me longer than I expected.

Spoiler for Foreword:

Hero in Disguise has brought up the idea of a TSAB Intelligence Department, along with its ranks, sections and their respective roles.
So I decided to play along.

Spoiler for Character Data:

• Personal and trivial data
  
• Name Roland Rafale
• Alignment Neutral
• Age 24 (25 after StrikerS)
• Birthdate July 28th
• Birthplace Midchildia
• Ethnicity Midchildian from french ancestry
• Bloodtype B rh+
• Hair color Blonde
• Eye color Greenish-blue
• Height 171cm
• Weight 65kg
• Likes Fine girls and a good old cognac
• Dislikes Drawing too much attention
• Favorite movie Once Upon in Time in the West
• Favorite song Where the Streets have no Name - U2
• Theorical seiyu Keiji Fujiwara
• Typical quote Come on, you are not going to punch a guy wearing eyeglasses, do you?
  
  
  
• TSAB relevant data
  
• Affiliation TSAB Intelligence Department. Section D.
• Magic rank C+, actually B
• Magic style Neo Belkan
• Magic Color Dark purple
• Main Element Shadow
• Specialization Stealth, infiltration.
• Device Armed Device Flamberge. A broad sword with a flame-like dark blue edge and a pump-shotgun mechanism built in the ricasso.

Musical Theme: Investigation of a Citizen above All Suspicion

Spoiler for Pic:

Spoiler for Generic character information:

Personality

When it comes to strangers, Roland comes as a discreet and laid back individual. He doesn't want to draw attention to him, hence he have gone for the intelligence department when he joined the TSAB.

But once he got in, he worked just enough to get to the ranks allowing him to carry his device but was severely underperforming when it comes to climb the higher ladder of the intelligence. department.

His superiors has tagged him with a slacker or "good potential but too much 'laissez aller' for any progress to ranks with a lot of responsibility" kind of label, excepted when it comes to the study of ancient relics or lost logia.

One thing was sure about him, he is a materialist, he doesn't believe much in the ideals that brought the TSAB in existence. Therefore, he was deeply involved in what seems to be harmless deals to got a little more than his usual income.

However, he is fiercely loyal to his comrades and will go to any lenght to help them.

Personal History

Roland's grandfather was a famous TSAB enforcer. His dedication to justice and great sense of honor earned the "Lion of the TSAB" nickname. Unfortunately, he fell from grace when one of his many enemies set a conspiracy in motion, leading Roland's grandfather to be framed then stripped of his enforcer rank. The grandfather was then forced to retire.

While the young Roland was an ambitious person at heart, the dishonor of his grandfather have drawn him to the conclusion that the secret of happiness is to not draw unwanted attention. Hence he never fought back when he was bullied at school. Instead, he worked harder as an apprentice mage under the relunctant teaching of his grandfather, but also as a fighter.

In school, he always ranked in fourth or fifth place, teachers has then noted about him that he was performing way under his true abilities.

The fact that he joined TSAB, in despite of the infamy left on his name, was a weird combination of luck, work and "behind the curtains" influence from the few people who believed that his grandfather could have been framed.

Upon joining the TSAB, he proved he could be a valuable trump thanks to his magic based on the manipulation of shadows as a mean to spy on people, conceal things or plain annoyance.

As for the period between before and after StrikerS:

Spoiler for to click or not to click?:

Roland has been deeply involved in the illegal trafic of relics, using his own shadow as a pocket dimension to conceal what he wanted to smuggle. He is not at the head of this shady business, being not enough intelligent for that, and have done the best he could to not get caught. As a consequence, he tries to avoid the likes of Acous but it is a matter of time before people start to talk. Because of his general behavior, suspicions over him has been on the low side of the spectrum.
He doesn't have ill intentions, his motives are purely based on money. He looks at the ideals animating the Aces with an amused look, even tho deep inside him, he envy them.
A passionate speech from any of the Ace or Strikers may be needed to bring him back to the right way.

Roland's general fighting and magic style

Roland tries to avoid direct confrontations as much as possible. In close quarter combat, he uses his fencing and savate training to avoid getting hit, occasionally using his shadow magic to pull him out of troubles called Starlight Breaker. His shadow magic was also used to paralyze opponents in the same fashion as binding spells.
Roland's shadow magic is pretty weak when used in daylight, but strong when it is nighttime or when Roland is in a very dark place.
Roland never developed a bombardement-type spell.

Roland's Armed Device

Roland's weapon with a customized Armed Device that speak French instead of German. Outisde of that, there are not any notable features about it. And that's what Roland wished.

Roland's Barrier Jacket

He never considered to design one.

Roland's view on canon characters

Nanoha A truly terrifying character. I am glad I am not under her command.

Fate I think she is too sweet for her current assignation.

Hayate Her weird antics kinda scares me.

Chrono He is okay I guess.

Yuuno A helpful lad. That's what I got from the times I met him in the Library when I needed some informations.

Lindy I admit it, age-defying mothers turns me on.

Signum Someone you dont want to fight on the battlefield.

Vita They are turning the TSAB into a kindergarten or what?

Shamal Good as a nurse, that's about it.

Zafira Hayate has the perfect bodyguard. Who can expect a dog to turn into a very capable fighter?

Reinforce Zwei What's that weird little thing?

Roland doesn't have any opinion on the other canon characters.


Design notes and inspiration

My first try at an OC in nanohaverse or any animeverse ever. I could have gone for the fierce hired killer found in many spy movie but I did not. He is loosely based on the slacker template with a "Dont want to draw unwanted attention" twist a la Kira Yoshikage from JoJo Part 4.
The pic is shamelessly ripped from a pic from Ragnarok Online.
The shadow idea is from Zato-1-One from Guilty Gear without the elements of abomination that made Zato the overpowered monster he has become.
Roland is a fairly common french name while Rafale is taken from the french aircraft.
Flamberge was the name of the sword of the french knight Renaud de Montauban.

Heeeh? An antagonist, huh? That certainly increases the interest rate of this character tremendously. Is he by chance the one responsible for the Relic incident at the airport?

Originally Posted by Aaron008R

Am thinking of how they should interact right now!

Hmm, Syn loves to backtalk, but I can't see them have intelectual conversations of Tesla and Aurion's level.

This requires a bit more thought.

Originally Posted by tshouryuu

Actually for the 2nd spell, I think its a bit on the weak side for a SSS spell as Hræsvelgr seems to have a damage radius larger than 2km already. I think you can double the damage radius.

You mean a single blast? That was hardly 2 km. 200 meter, maybe, but even that sounds stretching to me.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Spoiler for Conventional Weapons Banned:

Doing some research... I will just note in short that Conventional Weapons systems are not banned.

It is MASS BASED weapons that are Generally Forbiddon

And MASS BASED weapons are defined by Dialogue from Fate, as "Physical Matter that strikes the enemy, or explodes..."

I won't go into details, but those lines give loopholes to be exploited large enough to drive Bagger 288 through.

No, please do go into details, because right now your arguments are filled with holes I could pilot a Death Star through.

Also, source? Fate clearly says 'physical weapons that don't use magic.' Nukes, misiles, mines, mortars, grenades, guns, all such weapons fall into those categories, hence all such weapons are banned.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

As for Planet Cracker, I think that while a good destructive spell, the name is misleading. At MAX size of 3 km, it's hardly city or continent cracking, let alone planet. I'd suggest a name more along the lines of 'PILLARS OF __________' Or 'WHEEL OF ________' since your two main features of this spell are pillars of pure death, that spin like a wheel.

I agree, the name is really misleading. Also, Planet Cracker doesn't sound really like Hayate.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

@ Koreko:
That was a quick and dirty photoshop? O_o?
What's one with time actually taken?

If I take time? Then things like this, this or this one come out.

The 4koma took me the longest, for obvious reasons.

Originally Posted by Kagerou

Moving on, as you've noted, and as Keroko says later, I believe, Syn is to Fate as Vivio is to Nanoha. Innuendo is over nine-thousand.

The fact that Syn is as blunt as a brick when it comes to said innuendo isn't helping either.

Originally Posted by Kagerou

XDDD How sexy :3 .
Vivio: "...not gonna happen."
Syn: "Oh come on~"
Vivio: *blushing* "S-SYN!!!"
Syn: "Ahaha~ Easy to tease as ever, V."

... Or maybe she's serious.

Let the mayhem begin.

Originally Posted by Kagerou

As Goose and I did with the OFM, though really it was he and TK that hammered out those details. I suck when it comes to stuff like that, I just write stories (It's not that I don't do the research, I just make others do it for me .)

I do my research. Just... not as much as some people do. (for example, I don't care that tecnically energy to matter conversion is impossible, we see it happen in Nanoha so I wing it.)

Originally Posted by Kagerou

About TK... I PM'd him about the whole issue, and his response was... well, interesting. Suffice to say that thanks to the mod police we won't be seeing him much.

Eh, he'll be back. He's like a boomerang.

Originally Posted by Kagerou

Secondly, Goose is trying his hand at haxxbusting. Maybe he will do well *glares* he better do well.

Ooh, peer pressure.

[tshouryuu]

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Spoiler for Conventional Weapons Banned:

Doing some research... I will just note in short that Conventional Weapons systems are not banned.

It is MASS BASED weapons that are Generally Forbiddon

And MASS BASED weapons are defined by Dialogue from Fate, as "Physical Matter that strikes the enemy, or explodes..."

I won't go into details, but those lines give loopholes to be exploited large enough to drive Bagger 288 through.

I'll save those details for Coopers thoughts on TSAB Regulations...

Tigerclaw, while Fate did say those weapons are Generally Forbidden, you forgot to mention that "Ever since their founding, the TSA has, for peace and safety, rooted out those weapons..." Also what you're saying is nothing but sophistry in my opinion.

Originally Posted by Keroko

You mean a single blast? That was hardly 2 km. 200 meter, maybe, but even that sounds stretching to me.

:Shrug: My sense of scale is rather bad so I'll take your word for it.

Originally Posted by Keroko

No, please do go into details, because right now your arguments are filled with holes I could pilot a Death Star through.

Also, source? Fate clearly says 'physical weapons that don't use magic.' Nukes, misiles, mines, mortars, grenades, guns, all such weapons fall into those categories, hence all such weapons are banned.

I agree with Keroko, please do take the time to go into details.

[Evangelion Xgouki]

Originally Posted by Kagerou

As for Syn... maybe a polearm of some sort? I suggest a Glaive, since you don't see any here in Outer Cadia and because it may fit (not to mention subtle Sailor Saturn references XD ).

Actually, my OC Shamsel using a Device very similar to a Glaive called a Naginta.

Originally Posted by LimitedEternal

That's gotta be one of the most wack things I've ever seen. And I've seen quite a bit.

Oh it's not that bad. Then again I really like and understand a good chunk of Evangelion

Originally Posted by LimitedEternal

Been playing too much WoW, have we?

Nothing wrong with a little extra WoW

Originally Posted by USB500

ORE! SANJOU!!!!!

Oh, boy, how I loved the chapter. Poor Ryotaro, getting beaten just for his dramatic pose.

Not if he can keep running

Originally Posted by LoweGear

Well, no person can truly have 100% bad luck... at least, I think so

Ryotaro: Some say I'm pretty close to that...

Originally Posted by LoweGear

Aaaaaah, Tang

Deshou?

Originally Posted by LoweGear

Akira = Rider 1?
Ryotaro = Rider 2?

Originally Posted by LoweGear

I'd take 200% WOMAN over 50% anytime

*runs*

So I guess that means the last 50% of Asuka is 100% pure...cuteness?

*runs*

Originally Posted by LoweGear

What's this? Admiral Janeway? What?

But ORE SANJOU never gets old

Dr. Akagi better not meet Asagi though... or there's gonna be much blood spilled

Admiral Janeway was just too awesome NOT to use .

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

Lol, so Ryoutaro emerges? *chuckles* Interesting take on Kamen Rider, and I wonder how Aurion will feel, looking at all the belt devices.... Nice one. It's gonna be interesting when he meets Akira, thats for sure.

He doesn't emerge, he ARRIVES . And yes...a meeting needs to be...arranged *Gendo Pose*

Originally Posted by Aaron008R

Hayate: I-ineffective... *joins the others in the corner*

Me: you just had to use that word...

Roy M.: *mumbles something about rain* So...what brings you here?

Originally Posted by Aaron008R

Ooohh!!! Melikes! The test was straighforward but allowed to show the different forms. "Ore, Sanjou!" was GOLDEN!!!! Though wasn't that the AI's fault?

Perhaps...or maybe not...

Originally Posted by LoweGear

On the Bright Side, Hayate is the QUEEN OF OC here!!!!

Sou sou

Originally Posted by Kha

Actually, that is a GOOD IDEA! I call the Reclaimed Lands Ghostlands.

As for Silvermoon... There was an Blood Elf Eta settlement in Renault... After all, Kha and his father were ethnic Eta who followed the Belka way, like Kurds in Azadistan...



Anyway, since this is Plaguelands, I'm also resisting throwing in another instance on top of Scarlet Temple and Stratholme...

But Zul'Aman, does it fit?

Hmmm...I dunno about ZA. Although you could include Naxx...

Originally Posted by Kha

Arisa: Artei to-

Artei: Arisa mo-

~~~~~~ BELKA NETWORK ~~~~~~

Artei: Eeeh?! What's this section doing here all of a sudden?!
Arisa: And why am I here with you!!! (Gosh is this so embarassing... ) And what's with this cheesy background song...
Artei: I heard Creator-san and his friend like playing VA jokes, and so, the jokes supposedly on you, Ojou-sama.
Arisa: You got to be kidding me...
Artei: Dewa, today our special guest, as you can tell from the "GoGo Sentai Boukenger" being played, is a friend from Gakutenoh Academy. Let's welco--

Asagi: (appears in sentai suit) ATSUKI BOUKEN--

Arisa & Artei: Oops we're out of time. More comments next time. Bye-bye!

Asagi: O- Oi!

~~~~~~ Curtains ~~~~~~

A talk show you say?

Oh...and a little sample of what Ryotaro can do:

Originally Posted by Estavali

Btw the Spell Oven just churned these out:

Spoiler for Fresh from the Spell Oven: New spells for Hayate:

Doppelgänger

A high level spell that allows Hayate to create an almost exact copy of anyone, including herself. While this spell has various uses (including creating a sparing partner), Hayate usually use it in combat to create another her to keep the opposition occupied while she works on her more powerful and time-consuming spells. Only one Doppelgänger can be created from each original and only Hayate, and not her Doppelgänger, can create other Doppelgängers. To create Doppelgängers from others, she'll need to have exact information of their biological and magical make-up.

Planet Cracker (kudos to those who can guess where this name came from )

A ceremonial magick which is considered to be the most damaging AoE spell in Hayate's arsenal, the Planet Cracker was originally an experiment to find out how far she could push Ragnarok's limits. As the intonation of the aria begins, a huge white Belkan Hexagram materialises over the intended spot and emits a glow that gradually intensifies as it absorbs the Lifeforce from its surroundings. As the trigger ("Amen") is spoken, pillars of concentrated incinerating light blast forth from the centre and its six points, punching deeply into the earth with a deafening roar. Nothing is spared, and where the pillars do not come into direct contact, the raw energy burns in the wildly disturbed atmosphere will rend most asunder without fail. As the bombardment continues, the Hexagram will slowly rotate, covering any blindspots and, if Hayate can manage it, move while incinerating the land below.

While in terms of power it is nowhere close to weapons like the Arc En Ciel, it far surpass all other attack spells in area and damage, earning the undisputed rank of SSS. Understandably, the Planet Cracker has been labelled as a Forbidden Magick, and Hayate is banned from using it to its full potential (the maximum size of the Hexagram is recorded as 3 km radii from the centre at full power; she is only allow to use up to 1km radii, and even then she needs approval from her superiors to use that).

Of course not that Hayate herself could use it freely in the very first place (as with most of her original spells, she brainstormed/daydreamed the idea before actually going into the details, a practice instilled into her by her teacher Leanne Sidhe). The mana expenditure for this spell is astronomic even for her, and alone conjuring the 1km radii version requires max output and concentration, along with reinforcement from all nine layers of the Draupnir spell. However, if she creates a Doppelganger beforehand and works together with it, the full-powered Planet Cracker will be achievable.

The first spell, I intend to keep it, since it seems quite useful. But of course I don't expect Hayate to use it perfectly from the start. 8 years is a good enough period to polish stuff up, hmm.

The second one though....

*runs from haxx-busters*

Interesting...so is that an Easy Bake model?
Spells seem to fit her combat style...and I don't want to get in her way when she uses Planet Cracker

Well, as long as you have enough Pylons...

Originally Posted by Keroko

When I created Syn, the plan from the very beginning was to make her Vivio's 'Fate'. So expect heavy borderline suggestive situations, and concidering Syn's bluntness, beyond borderline comments.

Though I wonder... by 'hot grown-up Vivio/Syn action' could you by chance mean... something like this?

Spoiler for quick and dirty photoshop, but it gets the point across :3:

NI~~CE

[XenahortCharybdis]

Originally Posted by Keroko

Heeeh? An antagonist, huh? That certainly increases the interest rate of this character tremendously. Is he by chance the one responsible for the Relic incident at the airport?

Spoiler for Conversation with my OCs:

*Xena is reading the post*

*A figure pops out behind him*

???: Wasn't I supposed to be doing that-

Xena: Oh, hello Olivier...well, that's just tough. Now, you don't suppose I'm going to cook up something ELSE for you to do within the next 2 days-

Olivier: You sure as hell bet I suppose so. It was a great idea.

Xena: If no one claims that role, then it's up for the grabs, isn't it? Can't be helped if someone beats me to it.

*crack of a whip*

Olivier: Then hurry up and create me.

Xena: You've got to be kidding me, am I right?

Olivier: I don't look like I'm here to joke, do I? *waves whip*

Xena: Don't think you win at this yet. You have your Full House, but I have a Royal Flush. *waves an eraser*

Olivier: ....Fine, you win. Just...hurry up.

Xena: Yeah, yeah, whatever you say.

*Goes back to work while Olivier dumps himself onto a nearby bed*

*Another figure enters the room by the back door*

???: Oy, hey, pop. Is that crystal-mirror-or-whatever-you-call-it thingamajig of mine done yet?

*Xena pulls his hands of the keyboard*

Xena: Yes, it is. Now, if you all could wait till the end of tomorrow for me to dump the two of you online at the head of the vanguard, it'll be okay, I promise.

???: Yeah, I know it will...'Niways, what's my name again?

Xena: You're reminding me of this old man who forgot his grandson's name, and you know I don't like to remember it.

???: *scratches his bed hair* Okay, I'm sorry, it just slipped my mind. Tell me, what was it?

Xena: Your name is Ashcroft. Ashcroft Ravenholm.

Ashcroft: IT IS? I thought my name was Shawshank or Arkham or something...

Xena: Two things: One, you're very forgetful, and Two, you have got to stop spoiling other people's surnames for them. Now, go back to sleep, I'm working down here.

*Ashcroft leaves, and Xena looks over his sketches and papers again...*

Xena: *sarcastically* Dang, that was a real great spoiler, that dude blew 2 extra covers at one go. Genius.

[End of Schizophrenic Scene]

My first OC should be ready by tomorrow, if all goes well, although details on his department and unit and such are probably missing, since I still have little to no idea about what the Intel Dept is about.

Also, it has also been my lifelong belief that antagonists who exploit loopholes are great plot fodder, so I'm hoping the identity of the culprit/perpetrator/instigator stays open, I wanted (and still want) to use it...

[AdmiralTigerclaw]

Go into detail?

Fine. I'll go into detail.

Spoiler for DETAIL::

1 -

Originally Posted by Fate Testarossa: Nanoha StrikerS ep. 14

The TSA Generally forbids the use of Mass based weapons.

LOOPHOLE: 'Generally', in 'Generally Forbids', implies that not all mass based weapons are forbiddon in all situations. This implies that in Special Circumstances, MBWs can be authorized or tolerated.

CASE IN POINT: Vita has a mass based weapon attack, Swallow Flier, which sends magically created solid iron balls to smack up a target. She uses this attack, even in StrikerS, which shows that she is a special case. It may be because the attack generates little to no collatteral. It may be because nobody realizes what she's using as a weapon.

2 -

Originally Posted by Fate Testarossa: Nanoha StrikerS ep. 14

I guess you could say they're physical weapons that don't use magic, maybe.
*Pause, cut to 'horrors of war' pictures*
Firing physical matter that strikes the enemy, or explodes...

LOOPHOLE: Weapons classified as using physical matter to strike the enemy are off limits. However, so long as the weapon in question uses magic to inflict damage, it gets past this loophole in the logic. Therefore, the mechanisms and special principles of a weapon do not matter, only how it inflicts damage matters.

Originally Posted by Fate Testarossa: Nanoha StrikerS ep. 14

Ever since its founding, the TSA has, for peace and safety, rooted out those weapons and started to regulate the use of Lost Logia

Originally Posted by Erio: Nanoha Strikers ep. 14

Being both clean and safe, magical civilization was recommended.

Thoughts: The TSAB preffer magic over mass based weapons, because magical weaponry can be put in SAFEMODE to prevent collatteral and loss of life.

Case in Point: Vice's sniper rifle Storm Raider was fired during a hostage situation. He botched the shot and hit the girl, which shows the use of the 'safe mode' of a magic attack. With a real, metal bullet firing sniper rifle, the girl he shot who only had a damaged eye would have had her brains blown out the back of her head.
That would have just plain DESTROYED him, rather than make him slightly depressed.

Conclusions
- Special Circumstances will allow for mass weapons to exist, be in possession, or even used by, certain people, in certain situations.
- A gun can be made legal, and has been, so long as it fires magic, not a solid bullet slug.
- A Missile can be made legal, so long as it does not contain a mass based (IE High Explosive) warhead to strike the target/inflict damage to the target. This renders a missile nothing more then a computer guided, rocket propelled, delivery vehicle/glorified device. The warhead can be a magic based mechanism with the same SAFEMODEs as magic attacks from the Intelligent Rods/Staffs/Swords/Hammers/GUNS/Powerfists/Jet Rollerblades/Rings/Gloves/Tonfers/Books/etc...

@ The Images:

Are those drawn from scratch? Or are you cutting and slashing from every source you can get your hands on and compiling from there? (Either way is good work so long as it looks good as a finished product.)

I might have to make you do the OC Cast I have for kicks. Be funny to see a collage of Crash, Fox, Roland, Don, Marilyn, Martin, and Cooper.

**Incidently, the names for Don and Martin are dirrived from the name Don Martin, a higher up where I work. I think he's director of operations for Austaco... but I'd have to double check the office roster.**

... Or maybe she's serious.

Let the mayhem begin.

HARD HAT AREA yes?


CURRENT SONG: Corona - Rhythm of the Night

[Saint X]

Originally Posted by USB500

unfortunately I don't recognize them.

DO YOU WANT TO KNOW?

Originally Posted by LoweGear

I don't recognize them, but...

MEGANEKKO TRIO FTW!!!!!!!!

*jumps unto Saint X's Gondola*

ROW FASTER!!!!

DO YOU WANT TO KNOW?

*Passes by a gondola with three undines wearing three different uniforms- really fast*

Koraaa~

Aika-chan...

Dekkai urusai desu~

Originally Posted by LoweGear

Aaah I never really thought of Meer as a second Lacus

LOL

It's another of those Dei Mirror Moments I tell you!!!

*gets carted away by angry mob*

Originally Posted by XenahortCharybdis

...Oh well. But isn't rating of characters part and parcel of this thread or something? And if I read some earlier pages of this thing, ATC isn't the first to come up with a gattler, is he?

That would be me... with this OC

Spoiler for Kyla Scrya:

check Post 5 for details

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

@ Koreko:
That was a quick and dirty photoshop? O_o?
What's one with time actually taken?

*Whacks ATC with an undine's oar*

It's Keroko!

K-E-R-O-K-O!!

KE-RO-KO!!!

*Whacks ATC with an undine's oar yet again*

[AdmiralTigerclaw]

Originally Posted by Saint X

*Whacks ATC with an undine's oar*

It's Keroko!

K-E-R-O-K-O!!

KE-RO-KO!!!

*Whacks ATC with an undine's oar yet again*

*Twitch...*

Spoiler for Don't swing oars at me, I'm allergic to pain and tend to retaliate...:

Easy mistake to make. At least I only switched the letters' positions, not echcanged them for 'I' and turned the word into 'Kiriko'.

[Wild Goose]

Here I go yet again. At 2AM IN THE FUCKING MORNING.

RAMPAGE GHOST: BACKLOG SHIIIFT!!!!

Originally Posted by Tormenk

Actually Tk did post here awhile ago. The two posts was his h4xbuster opinion on ATC's stuff, putting it mildly. A mod deleted both for being pointless and off-topic. What's left of the original two posts are bits and pieces quoted by me Aaron and Wild Goose about other stuff.

I queried the mod in question, explaining that the posts were on-topic in the context of OC and that we desperately rely on TK's haxbusting; White Manju Bun replied to me that someone reported TK's posts as flaming, and the mods agreed it was flaming. White Manju Bun's interpretation of off-topic apparently stemmed from an unfamiliarity with OC, which I cleared up about, but remained adamant that it was a joint moderation team decision to delete the posts as they were flames. Which I feel is a great pity.

Also, we were pretty much waiting for TK to come in and return fire. ATC pretty much stated in either the Fanfic or Tech thread that he had more stamina and could outargue us all until the cows come home.

If only he could spellcheck and format properly... *sighs*

I had the impression Ancient Belka style had a lot of norse influence in general and brought it over to fanon as well.

Makes sense, what with Hresvelger, Misteltin (i know I've gotten the spelling wrong), Ragnarok.

Originally Posted by Kha

Vivio: Don't... make... me... sound... FAT!!!

*LE goes airborne*

Vivio: BakaBakaBakaBakaBaka... LE no BAKHAAA!

*LE dings into the night sky*

Hmm... Tsunderes... Wait.

Lawl, is that an OGs ref I see? Excellen in Huckbein Mk III Boxer Frame, IIRC ^__^

Originally Posted by LoweGear

YOSHA

Finally finished the second part of Atsuki Boukenshaa's profile update, though this one covers her personality. Skills, Devices and Abilities to be covered next chapter

Spoiler for length:

*dynamic profile*

*whistles* Whoa. Just... whoa. Muchly crack... but enjoyable nontheless. ^___^

Originally Posted by Estavali

Btw the Spell Oven just churned these out:

Spoiler for Fresh from the Spell Oven: New spells for Hayate:

Doppelgänger

A high level spell that allows Hayate to create an almost exact copy of anyone, including herself. While this spell has various uses (including creating a sparing partner), Hayate usually use it in combat to create another her to keep the opposition occupied while she works on her more powerful and time-consuming spells. Only one Doppelgänger can be created from each original and only Hayate, and not her Doppelgänger, can create other Doppelgängers. To create Doppelgängers from others, she'll need to have exact information of their biological and magical make-up.

Planet Cracker (kudos to those who can guess where this name came from )

A ceremonial magick which is considered to be the most damaging AoE spell in Hayate's arsenal, the Planet Cracker was originally an experiment to find out how far she could push Ragnarok's limits. As the intonation of the aria begins, a huge white Belkan Hexagram materialises over the intended spot and emits a glow that gradually intensifies as it absorbs the Lifeforce from its surroundings. As the trigger ("Amen") is spoken, pillars of concentrated incinerating light blast forth from the centre and its six points, punching deeply into the earth with a deafening roar. Nothing is spared, and where the pillars do not come into direct contact, the raw energy burns in the wildly disturbed atmosphere will rend most asunder without fail. As the bombardment continues, the Hexagram will slowly rotate, covering any blindspots and, if Hayate can manage it, move while incinerating the land below.

While in terms of power it is nowhere close to weapons like the Arc En Ciel, it far surpass all other attack spells in area and damage, earning the undisputed rank of SSS. Understandably, the Planet Cracker has been labelled as a Forbidden Magick, and Hayate is banned from using it to its full potential (the maximum size of the Hexagram is recorded as 3 km radii from the centre at full power; she is only allow to use up to 1km radii, and even then she needs approval from her superiors to use that).

Of course not that Hayate herself could use it freely in the very first place (as with most of her original spells, she brainstormed/daydreamed the idea before actually going into the details, a practice instilled into her by her teacher Leanne Sidhe). The mana expenditure for this spell is astronomic even for her, and alone conjuring the 1km radii version requires max output and concentration, along with reinforcement from all nine layers of the Draupnir spell. However, if she creates a Doppelganger beforehand and works together with it, the full-powered Planet Cracker will be achievable.

The first spell, I intend to keep it, since it seems quite useful. But of course I don't expect Hayate to use it perfectly from the start. 8 years is a good enough period to polish stuff up, hmm.

The second one though....

*runs from haxx-busters*

TK isn't here! He's not around! But in our hearts and in our haxbuster rifles, he lives in OC still! So long as this heart beats, the spirit of Haxbuster lives in me!

...right, basically, spell No. 2 is much HAX. Keroko-kun mentioned the dichotomy in using "Amen" as the trigger; also, there is no freakin' way a single mage can do this... at least, as far as we've seen. So far. It's most assuredly hax and too overpowered.

If you have to ask if it's overpowered, it probably is. If you have to ask if it's hax, it most likely is. Remember that, people!

Originally Posted by Keroko

When I created Syn, the plan from the very beginning was to make her Vivio's 'Fate'. So expect heavy borderline suggestive situations, and concidering Syn's bluntness, beyond borderline comments.

Though I wonder... by 'hot grown-up Vivio/Syn action' could you by chance mean... something like this?

Spoiler for quick and dirty photoshop, but it gets the point across :3:

*spasms*

*saves picture*

*stares at Naomi's chest* ... Do you really have to ask?

Naomi: "Yes! What do they have that I don't which gives them those huge busts?!?!"
Franz: "I personally think it's psychological repression due to that time we nearly died together almost a year after you joined us..."

Hmm, I can certainly imagine Mandy doing the OFM a favour by reassigning Master Chief to them. Mandy sees the merrit of a unit like the OFM, and being on good terms with them can only work out in the long run.

Go for it.

Thanks The OFM timeline will now state for sure that Mandy reassigned Master Chief to the OFM as a favor. ^__^

Tk has not been around for some time, and the rest of us went easy on the new guy. A mistake I won't repeat again, mind you.

To be honest, I think more than a few of us also felt that the only person who could have haxbusted the new guy was TK. Once I saw the link to Spacebattles, I said, "Alright. fuck this, the only person who can haxbust this is TK."

Originally Posted by Sheba

First try on a OC, it took me longer than I expected.

Spoiler for Foreword:

Hero in Disguise has brought up the idea of a TSAB Intelligence Department, along with its ranks, sections and their respective roles.
So I decided to play along.

Spoiler for Character Data:

*snip*

I like how this charecter isn't too powerful, is trying not to make waves, and is actually a bad guy. *grins* And so long as he keeps a low profile, the OFM aren't going to be after him - unless he's a lead to bigger fish that they want to fry. Good first try, and bonus points for being named after the fighter. ^__^

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Spoiler for Conventional Weapons Banned:

Doing some research... I will just note in short that Conventional Weapons systems are not banned.

It is MASS BASED weapons that are Generally Forbiddon

And MASS BASED weapons are defined by Dialogue from Fate, as "Physical Matter that strikes the enemy, or explodes..."

I won't go into details, but those lines give loopholes to be exploited large enough to drive Bagger 288 through.

I'll save those details for Coopers thoughts on TSAB Regulations...

Fate's line says "Physical weapons that DO NOT USE MAGIC" (emphasis mine). Thus, this means that firearms are banned.

Frankly, given the wordings, plus the imagery of missiles and the like, it's very likely that conventional weapons as we know them are classified as mass-based weapons by the TSAB. ALL of our conventional weapons fire solid projectiles. Vita's Schwalbe Fliegen gets a pass because it is summoned by MAGIC.The same applies to the Armed Devices. Attacks by Armed Devices are magical-augmented melee, recognised as a magic style by TSAB.

Guns do NOT use magic. Thus, they are BANNED. If it's a weapon and it fires crap that penetrates or explodes and it uses physical ammunition and it does not use magic, it is BANNED. PERIOD. READ MY TEXT.

Before you start going talking about the OFM's Warthogs and Pelicans, here's something to note: All gatling-armed Warthog LRVs and the OFM's SINGLE Gauss Warthog are stored on the Aus'ruf, kept far away from TSAB inspections (and with some coverup help from Mandy - I just realised that since the Aus'ruf is technically part of the Navy and the OFM and Mandy appear to be having a good working relationship, personal feelings regardless, Mandy would probably want to help cover for them subtly, so that she can continue to make use of them). The only OFM assets stored on Mid-Childa are severa unarmed Troop Transport Warthogs and unarmed Pelicans. All weapons are kept to the lowest minimums possible, and can be quickly kept and secreted in case of surprise inspections.

Unlike ABNO, the OFM aren't flaunting the banned weapons.

To use another example: Hollowpoint ammunition is banned for military use. Thus, the US does not use hollowpoint ammunition in their frontline combat units. Even special forces use ball ammo for their rifles. The only units using hollowpoints for their SMGs - SOCOM & NAVSPECWAR - are the ones who do so quietly, not flaunting around their use of banned ammo.

I unfortunately have to go back to the OFM, because they're the most high-profile OC denizens with guns... The OFM keep their guns primarily for missions on non-administered worlds. Using guns on Mid-Childa would create a shitstorm and all sorts of uncomfortable questions. Which is EXACTLY what happens in the non-canon Divergent StrikerS. A humongous shitstorm occurs, and the OFM are nearly shut down for using banned weapons: Franz led a convoy of Warthog LRVs and a Scorpion through Mid-Childa to relieve the beseiged RF6 and Master Chief; the next week, Master Chief deployed in a Scorpion to repel Gadget Drones, and the Order's REMFs strapped on body armor, were issued MA5C assault rifles and .50cal MGs, and sent off to help hold the line. And they were nearly shut down - Franz, Erick and Glen pretty much watched their promotion prospects shrivel and die, and escaped court-martials by a very, very fine margin.

Originally Posted by Kagerou

XDDD How sexy :3 .
Vivio: "...not gonna happen."
Syn: "Oh come on~"
Vivio: *blushing* "S-SYN!!!"
Syn: "Ahaha~ Easy to tease as ever, V."

Leena: "Liking girls it ain't no sin~" *singsong*

As Goose and I did with the OFM, though really it was he and TK that hammered out those details. I suck when it comes to stuff like that, I just write stories (It's not that I don't do the research, I just make others do it for me .)

You're better at the creation aspect than I am; I just get this flashes of inspiration that build up on the foundations of those who went before. Of course, we have eyes, going through the hole dug by those before, etc etc. And I am better at research.

About TK... I PM'd him about the whole issue, and his response was... well, interesting. Suffice to say that thanks to the mod police we won't be seeing him much.

Secondly, Goose is trying his hand at haxxbusting. Maybe he will do well *glares* he better do well.

I'm trying. TK is a lot better with haxxbusting and I've been trying to pick up from him. My talents are more towards haxxbustingplot/charecter and logic. And quite frankly, I'm rusty at arguing. But I'm working up.

[AdmiralTigerclaw]

I'll wait for you to catch up Goose.

[Wild Goose]

Oh for god's sake ANOTHER POST?!

Stupid fscking internet. Stupid slow connection.

It's 3 AM now. I've been up for 21 hours. I'm tired, my hands are sore, but shoulders hurt and my upper body is feeling the fatigue. The coherence will be random and not clear. THEREFORE, I will preliminary haxbust. THEN I will sleep, and do a full-assed proper job after being rested.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

1 -
LOOPHOLE: 'Generally', in 'Generally Forbids', implies that not all mass based weapons are forbiddon in all situations. This implies that in Special Circumstances, MBWs can be authorized or tolerated.

CASE IN POINT: Vita has a mass based weapon attack, Swallow Flier, which sends magically created solid iron balls to smack up a target. She uses this attack, even in StrikerS, which shows that she is a special case. It may be because the attack generates little to no collatteral. It may be because nobody realizes what she's using as a weapon.

You've just stated that the balls are created VIA MAGIC. Thus, this is not a conventional weapon, this is a magical weapon. Vita gets her pass because the Belkan style is recognised by the TSAB as being magically-augmented melee focused on physical attacks. Is that so hard to understand/accept?

2 -LOOPHOLE: Weapons classified as using physical matter to strike the enemy are off limits. However, so long as the weapon in question uses magic to inflict damage, it gets past this loophole in the logic. Therefore, the mechanisms and special principles of a weapon do not matter, only how it inflicts damage matters.

This is possible. Teana's Anchor Gun is apparently a breechloader, Storm Raider and Cross Mirage use feeding systems pulled from automatic weapons. At 3AM, I cannot see anything wrong wit this statement.

Thoughts: The TSAB preffer magic over mass based weapons, because magical weaponry can be put in SAFEMODE to prevent collatteral and loss of life.

Case in Point: Vice's sniper rifle Storm Raider was fired during a hostage situation. He botched the shot and hit the girl, which shows the use of the 'safe mode' of a magic attack. With a real, metal bullet firing sniper rifle, the girl he shot who only had a damaged eye would have had her brains blown out the back of her head.
That would have just plain DESTROYED him, rather than make him slightly depressed.

Our impressions were that there are less people with magic than norms, and by taking away the conventional weapons of war used by the norms, the TSAB is maintaining a quilitative edge over insurrections/what have yous. Military thread, this is your fault. *scowls* This is also a possible and plausible senario.

and.... I still don't see how this is relevant to your case. In fact, it appears that you're bolstering the support for the ban on conventional weapons, for the exact reasons you've mentioned.

Conclusions
- Special Circumstances will allow for mass weapons to exist, be in possession, or even used by, certain people, in certain situations.

Incorrect. You're using Vita as your argument, but her Swallow Flier attack is a magically summoned attack. It uses magic to create the balls, and the balls disappear into ether/air when the magic runs out.

- A gun can be made legal, and has been, so long as it fires magic, not a solid bullet slug.

There is no evidence to support this. StrikerS media and the anime strongly imply that gun-shaped Device users are a small minority in the TSAB. It can thus be inferred that guns are still rare, not only because of the ban, but because of cultural issues. It is implied that the Mid-Childans nearly wiped themselves out with conventional weapons.

- A Missile can be made legal, so long as it does not contain a mass based (IE High Explosive) warhead to strike the target/inflict damage to the target. This renders a missile nothing more then a computer guided, rocket propelled, delivery vehicle/glorified device. The warhead can be a magic based mechanism with the same SAFEMODEs as magic attacks from the Intelligent Rods/Staffs/Swords/Hammers/GUNS/Powerfists/Jet Rollerblades/Rings/Gloves/Tonfers/Books/etc...

Missiles are still mass weapons. Ever heard of Kinetic Energy weapons? The missile body will explode when it deploys the warhead and that will have an explosion and there will be shrapnel flying about. How is that NOT banned?

*yawns tiredly* Fuck, 3.15 am.

[AdmiralTigerclaw]

Since your coherency is an extreme question, (along with your control of your temper) I will not respond to this post at this time since I have an unfairly sharp mind in the early afternoon here and found a number of components to pick apart in your, fatigued out response. I'll wait for the organized response.

[Saint X]

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

*Twitch...*

Spoiler for Don't swing oars at me, I'm allergic to pain and tend to retaliate...:

Easy mistake to make. At least I only switched the letters' positions, not echcanged them for 'I' and turned the word into 'Kiriko'.

Andrei: You missed... by a mile... and that's what you get for wrong spelling in The Soviet OC - Luckily it was not a heavier object (i.e. gondola) or even *tink* *tink* a newly bought Otis...

*Readies Capelia*

Andrei: You really wanted to erase a part of your multiple existances from the cosmos? How many of you should i take down then in one fell swoop? Or on the other hand, should i just watch you being LARTed by the mob?

[Keroko]

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Easy mistake to make. At least I only switched the letters' positions, not echcanged them for 'I' and turned the word into 'Kiriko'.

Meh, concidering the O and the I keys are right next to one another, I wouldn't even bat an eyelash if you did.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Go into detail?

Fine. I'll go into detail.

Finally! Stuff to work with.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

LOOPHOLE: 'Generally', in 'Generally Forbids', implies that not all mass based weapons are forbiddon in all situations. This implies that in Special Circumstances, MBWs can be authorized or tolerated.

On a rather amusing note, I'm not sure Fate even uses the word 'generally' (either gaishite, soubetsu, soujite or zentai are words that I found sharing the same meaning and context) I'm hoping Coldlight comes out with his 14 sub soon. In the meantime, any moonspeakers in the thread that can pin a yes or no on this?

Regardless, Fate's generally is more likely to refer to armed devices (like Schwertkruez) or melee-based Intelligent Devices (like Levantine or Graff Eisen) then guns or misilles.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

CASE IN POINT: Vita has a mass based weapon attack, Swallow Flier, which sends magically created solid iron balls to smack up a target. She uses this attack, even in StrikerS, which shows that she is a special case. It may be because the attack generates little to no collatteral. It may be because nobody realizes what she's using as a weapon.

It's a magical weapon, who's projectiles disapear after use. The difference between this and a conventional weapon are astronomical. I can remember a claim that Vita's Schwallbe Fliegen was equal to a tank shot, the people in the Tech thread had a good laugh at that.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

LOOPHOLE: Weapons classified as using physical matter to strike the enemy are off limits. However, so long as the weapon in question uses magic to inflict damage, it gets past this loophole in the logic. Therefore, the mechanisms and special principles of a weapon do not matter, only how it inflicts damage matters.

In which case we end up with magical weapons. I still see no reason how that allows your group to parade with the fact that they have complete stashes of conventional weaponry. Not to mention create weapons that use no mage as a middle man to operate them, and thus are a danger to everyone.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Thoughts: The TSAB preffer magic over mass based weapons, because magical weaponry can be put in SAFEMODE to prevent collatteral and loss of life.

Correct.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Case in Point: Vice's sniper rifle Storm Raider was fired during a hostage situation. He botched the shot and hit the girl, which shows the use of the 'safe mode' of a magic attack. With a real, metal bullet firing sniper rifle, the girl he shot who only had a damaged eye would have had her brains blown out the back of her head.
That would have just plain DESTROYED him, rather than make him slightly depressed.

Again, correct.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Conclusions
- Special Circumstances will allow for mass weapons to exist, be in possession, or even used by, certain people, in certain situations.

Magical weapon. Vita's weapon is a magical weapon.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

- A gun can be made legal, and has been, so long as it fires magic, not a solid bullet slug.

.... Uhm, in other words, guns are illegal, but gun shaped devices are okay. Yes, that's right, but that still doesn't support the legilazation (or even allowing) the idea of normal guns.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

- A Missile can be made legal, so long as it does not contain a mass based (IE High Explosive) warhead to strike the target/inflict damage to the target. This renders a missile nothing more then a computer guided, rocket propelled, delivery vehicle/glorified device. The warhead can be a magic based mechanism with the same SAFEMODEs as magic attacks from the Intelligent Rods/Staffs/Swords/Hammers/GUNS/Powerfists/Jet Rollerblades/Rings/Gloves/Tonfers/Books/etc...

No. I quote Erio: "Once they are made, even a kid could use them. And that moving a finger could destroy an entire world." A missile can be fired without using the mage as a middle man, therefore, it falls under the category that Erio described. Your little 'rampaging airplane' scenario you posted shows the exact reason why the TSAB will never allow such research openly. The people of Mid-Childa live in the knowledge that conventional weapons no longer exist on their world, any research facillity willing to conduct the research you describe would have to either:

A: Do such research severely secretive and undercover (which means no flashy jets and mass storages of conventional weapons and a damn good explanartion why, who is sponsiring them, and how the rest of the TSAB is unaware)

B: Do such research on a remote planet where the law is a lot more flexible (in which case you'd need a backstory as to why the TSAB is allowing that)

or C: Do such research as a rogue faction, without the TSAB knowledge (in which case even heavier limits then A apply)

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Are those drawn from scratch? Or are you cutting and slashing from every source you can get your hands on and compiling from there? (Either way is good work so long as it looks good as a finished product.)

I can't really draw that well, unfortunately. Those were cut, slashed, and recollored from every source I could get my hands on. Some have original concepts integrated or manipulated (this one, for example, was created from this original, massive list of layers, tools, and creativity were required, but nothing was cut and pasted)

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

I might have to make you do the OC Cast I have for kicks. Be funny to see a collage of Crash, Fox, Roland, Don, Marilyn, Martin, and Cooper.

**Incidently, the names for Don and Martin are dirrived from the name Don Martin, a higher up where I work. I think he's director of operations for Austaco... but I'd have to double check the office roster.**

I'll need general apearance, and if possible a good supporting picture. Lowegear is also one of our resident photoshop experts.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

HARD HAT AREA yes?

... I'll just nod and preted to know what that means.

[AdmiralTigerclaw]

Originally Posted by Saint X

Andrei: You missed... by a mile... and that's what you get for wrong spelling in The Soviet OC - Luckily it was not a heavier object (i.e. gondola) or even *tink* *tink* a newly bought Otis...

*Readies Capelia*

Andrei: You really wanted to erase a part of your multiple existances from the cosmos? How many of you should i take down then in one fell swoop? Or on the other hand, should i just watch you being LARTed by the mob?

If I only missed by a mile, then I didn't miss. Considering a full power shot off a Sunstar Cannon has enough energy to turn Atami city Japan into a molten crater...

Spoiler for AIs with bad tempers hurt villains badly.:

**NOTE: Cue the 14 second mark of 'Orbital Strike'**

<Flare to white, fade away from solar lense flare. Camera pan to Earth then circles to the dark side of the planet, moon passes behind frame as camera roars past Galaxius. Galaxius is only barely lit by the earth, so it's more seen from its lights onboard, as to remain hidden for now... Camera turns and centers on the lights of Japan. Starship hull enters frame rapidly and then scene cuts to bridge.>

<Bridge is still covered in alarm and emergency computer alert holo-consoles

Paul: What is going ON down there? This is getting out of hand...

<Bridge goes dark, sound of computer powerdown... >

Paul: What the?

<Lights come back on, but all the former holographic consoles are gone. In their place, only a couple of blank consoles appear near the tech. He immediately reports on the heals of paul's next question.>

Paul: What just-

Tech: She just rebooted the entire system network. All erranious traffic is cleared... Wait... She's accessed fire control, main system control has been interrupted, emergency combat protocalls... !!! Primary Turret Three just went hot!

<Camera cuts to Paul's eyes as they dialate. Then back to the tech>

Tech: Targetting sensors active, she's processing a firing solution! I'm registering sunstar three at full power targetting... OH SHIT! Accessing planetary GPS grid! Japan, Honshu, Shizuoka, Atami City...

Paul: My god... she wouldn't- Stop her! At that setting she'll blow that city right off the planet!

Tech: She's locked out all command functions! Override is non-responsive!

<Ship intercom beeps, Allice's system voice rings out in a calm tone.>

Allice: Fire Control Interlock Command Authorization Code Zeus. Releasing Safety Interlocks...

Paul: Don't do it!
Tech: Internal interface management hasn't been booted, she can't hear you!

<A buzz and a hologram of Allice appears on the bridge still speaking, several displays blink to life next to her, but she looks on into space without noticing anything.>

Allice: Firing Solution Achieved, tactical grid: 35,05,45-N mark 139,04,14-E

(SUBNOTE: Actual GPS Grid of Atami, Shizuoka, Japan)

<Paul Looks on in horror as there is nothing he can do.>

Allice: Firing lock cancelled.


<Cut to surface. Sarah is shaking Allice trying to get her to respond.>

Sarah: What are you doing?!

<Allice is speaking in monotone throughout... Samuel runs over and yells at Sarah even while Allice continues to rattle on.>

Allice: Firing Clearance Confirmed, Turret Three to 100% percent...

Samuel: Just forget it and run, I got her!

<Camera cuts to Thomas.>

Thomas: No! Help me with a barrier!

Samuel: Are you DAFT?! We need to run! This spot's about to get-

Thomas: EVERYWHERE is about to get hit! There's no place to run!

<Flash cut back to the dimly lit Galaxius, then cut to the bridge to the Allice hologram from directly ahead. She looks to her left and raises her arm over her head. Camera cuts to view her from the direction she's looking. She slowely levels her arm at the camera, her hand looking like she formed it into a pistol. Visual effects replaces the bridge background with a transparency fade with the turret's twin barrels right below her arm, as if her arm is directing the cannon.>

<Once her arm levels, transparency fades out the bridge leaving just the turret. The barrels begin to glow and particle effects gather into the center of the barrels as the camera gently pulls back...>

<Seen cut to tri-stacked frame showing Thomas, Samuel, and Chrinoss' heads. ((Thomas on top on the left side, Samuel on bottom on the left side, Chrinoss in the middle on the right side.)) they all recieve a simultanious 'I feel it!' flash across their faces. Thomas and Samuels frames wipe leaving just Chrinoss' frame. His head yanks up as the camera slides around below him to near his feet... in the sky above the clouds is a white 'star'.>

CHRINOSS: HOLY SHIT! That's INSANE!

<Camera cuts to wide shot of Chrinos as he turns and starts to run.>

Chrinoss: By your leave gentlemen!

<Camera cuts to Samuel as he grits his teeth and spins...>

SAMUEL: Oh no you AREN'T! ADDO MEU-

(SPELLCAST)
SARAH: PONDUS AMOVEO!
(/SPELLCAST)

<Camera cuts to a spot on the ground near Chrinoss as he takes a step, then the air ripples and he stumbles, his face slamming into the ground close enough to the Camera to show his teeth clearly. After he winces from impact his eyes snap open in shock.>

Chrinoss: WHAT?!

<Camera cuts to Samuel in equal shock, who snaps his head over to... Sarah.>

SAMUEL: When did-?!

<Camera cuts to Sarah, who is gasping for breath from the effort of casting the spell.>

SARAH: Take your divine punishment!

<Camera cuts to Samuel as he smirks...>

SAMUEL: Now that's a one liner...

THOMAS: Admire LATER!

<Camera cuts to Thomas, he looks pretty much freaked out.>

THOMAS: ...Shield NOW!

<Camera Cuts to Bridge of Galaxius. Camera cuts to closeup of Allice's holographic face, then the focus shifts out to her hand, now looking like a gun. Camera cuts to her left side, looking out to the forward left of the ship, slightly from above her head... She then says something to herself...>

ALLICE: 'Bang.'

<And on 'Bang', she kicks her arm up as if she's fired a hand gun.>

<Camera cuts to the external view from the front of the ship from about two ship-length's away, and slightly to the left of the ship. The screen flashes and the camera shakes violently as a massive beam appears on screen... shaking for about another two to three seconds as the camera fades to white...>

<Camera cuts to the surface again. Quickly cycling through the lead characters in time to the beat of the BGM... It ends on Chrinoss as he's just managed to stand. Camera cuts to above him as he looks up the ground taking a blue reflective glow below him... Cemera then cuts to the side of his face as he closes his eyes...>

Chrinoss: Oh... Damn it al-

<Camera cuts away at the final hits of the BGM, showing Atami city from the view out in the bay/harbor, just feet off the water. On the final note of the BGM, the screen flashes white, all sound blanked. As the white flash fades, the blue beam can be seen lancing through the clouds... the clouds themselves hurridly dissipate away in a ring until it goes off frame. The beam's impact point, somewhere in the city, shows a brilliant white lense flare, even as the beam fades. Sound fades in to ocean sounds, and then an almost subsonic rumble and the camera shakes... An air shockwave can be seen sweeping the hills, and then the water approaching the camera shows the disturbance of the shockwave, it races into the camera, and when it hits, the loud crack and thunderous boom of the explosion rips into the sound, and the camera violently jolts. The point of impact of the beam continues to flare, and then gets brighter and the scene fades to white, then fades to black. Bringing the scene to a close.>

But Don't TEMPT me... I have a bad habbit of going straight to Cosmic Grade (Tier Five) attack spells when I miss with conventional orbital strikes. And Tier Five doesn't 'miss'.

Spoiler for Ouch: Too Haxx for any nanohaverse.:

I'm still trying to cut back on Excessive Use of Overkill in a Non-Overkill requiring scenerio. The Doc. says I've come a long way. Don't make me have a relapse.

[Saint X]

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

If I only missed by a mile, then I didn't miss. Considering a full power shot off a Sunstar Cannon has enough energy to turn Atami city Japan into a molten crater...

Spoiler for AIs with bad tempers hurt villains badly.:

**NOTE: Cue the 14 second mark of 'Orbital Strike'**

<Flare to white, fade away from solar lense flare. Camera pan to Earth then circles to the dark side of the planet, moon passes behind frame as camera roars past Galaxius. Galaxius is only barely lit by the earth, so it's more seen from its lights onboard, as to remain hidden for now... Camera turns and centers on the lights of Japan. Starship hull enters frame rapidly and then scene cuts to bridge.>

<Bridge is still covered in alarm and emergency computer alert holo-consoles

Paul: What is going ON down there? This is getting out of hand...

<Bridge goes dark, sound of computer powerdown... >

Paul: What the?

<Lights come back on, but all the former holographic consoles are gone. In their place, only a couple of blank consoles appear near the tech. He immediately reports on the heals of paul's next question.>

Paul: What just-

Tech: She just rebooted the entire system network. All erranious traffic is cleared... Wait... She's accessed fire control, main system control has been interrupted, emergency combat protocalls... !!! Primary Turret Three just went hot!

<Camera cuts to Paul's eyes as they dialate. Then back to the tech>

Tech: Targetting sensors active, she's processing a firing solution! I'm registering sunstar three at full power targetting... OH SHIT! Accessing planetary GPS grid! Japan, Honshu, Shizuoka, Atami City...

Paul: My god... she wouldn't- Stop her! At that setting she'll blow that city right off the planet!

Tech: She's locked out all command functions! Override is non-responsive!

<Ship intercom beeps, Allice's system voice rings out in a calm tone.>

Allice: Fire Control Interlock Command Authorization Code Zeus. Releasing Safety Interlocks...

Paul: Don't do it!
Tech: Internal interface management hasn't been booted, she can't hear you!

<A buzz and a hologram of Allice appears on the bridge still speaking, several displays blink to life next to her, but she looks on into space without noticing anything.>

Allice: Firing Solution Achieved, tactical grid: 35,05,45-N mark 139,04,14-E

(SUBNOTE: Actual GPS Grid of Atami, Shizuoka, Japan)

<Paul Looks on in horror as there is nothing he can do.>

Allice: Firing lock cancelled.


<Cut to surface. Sarah is shaking Allice trying to get her to respond.>

Sarah: What are you doing?!

<Allice is speaking in monotone throughout... Samuel runs over and yells at Sarah even while Allice continues to rattle on.>

Allice: Firing Clearance Confirmed, Turret Three to 100% percent...

Samuel: Just forget it and run, I got her!

<Camera cuts to Thomas.>

Thomas: No! Help me with a barrier!

Samuel: Are you DAFT?! We need to run! This spot's about to get-

Thomas: EVERYWHERE is about to get hit! There's no place to run!

<Flash cut back to the dimly lit Galaxius, then cut to the bridge to the Allice hologram from directly ahead. She looks to her left and raises her arm over her head. Camera cuts to view her from the direction she's looking. She slowely levels her arm at the camera, her hand looking like she formed it into a pistol. Visual effects replaces the bridge background with a transparency fade with the turret's twin barrels right below her arm, as if her arm is directing the cannon.>

<Once her arm levels, transparency fades out the bridge leaving just the turret. The barrels begin to glow and particle effects gather into the center of the barrels as the camera gently pulls back...>

<Seen cut to tri-stacked frame showing Thomas, Samuel, and Chrinoss' heads. ((Thomas on top on the left side, Samuel on bottom on the left side, Chrinoss in the middle on the right side.)) they all recieve a simultanious 'I feel it!' flash across their faces. Thomas and Samuels frames wipe leaving just Chrinoss' frame. His head yanks up as the camera slides around below him to near his feet... in the sky above the clouds is a white 'star'.>

CHRINOSS: HOLY SHIT! That's INSANE!

<Camera cuts to wide shot of Chrinos as he turns and starts to run.>

Chrinoss: By your leave gentlemen!

<Camera cuts to Samuel as he grits his teeth and spins...>

SAMUEL: Oh no you AREN'T! ADDO MEU-

(SPELLCAST)
SARAH: PONDUS AMOVEO!
(/SPELLCAST)

<Camera cuts to a spot on the ground near Chrinoss as he takes a step, then the air ripples and he stumbles, his face slamming into the ground close enough to the Camera to show his teeth clearly. After he winces from impact his eyes snap open in shock.>

Chrinoss: WHAT?!

<Camera cuts to Samuel in equal shock, who snaps his head over to... Sarah.>

SAMUEL: When did-?!

<Camera cuts to Sarah, who is gasping for breath from the effort of casting the spell.>

SARAH: Take your divine punishment!

<Camera cuts to Samuel as he smirks...>

SAMUEL: Now that's a one liner...

THOMAS: Admire LATER!

<Camera cuts to Thomas, he looks pretty much freaked out.>

THOMAS: ...Shield NOW!

<Camera Cuts to Bridge of Galaxius. Camera cuts to closeup of Allice's holographic face, then the focus shifts out to her hand, now looking like a gun. Camera cuts to her left side, looking out to the forward left of the ship, slightly from above her head... She then says something to herself...>

ALLICE: 'Bang.'

<And on 'Bang', she kicks her arm up as if she's fired a hand gun.>

<Camera cuts to the external view from the front of the ship from about two ship-length's away, and slightly to the left of the ship. The screen flashes and the camera shakes violently as a massive beam appears on screen... shaking for about another two to three seconds as the camera fades to white...>

<Camera cuts to the surface again. Quickly cycling through the lead characters in time to the beat of the BGM... It ends on Chrinoss as he's just managed to stand. Camera cuts to above him as he looks up the ground taking a blue reflective glow below him... Cemera then cuts to the side of his face as he closes his eyes...>

Chrinoss: Oh... Damn it al-

<Camera cuts away at the final hits of the BGM, showing Atami city from the view out in the bay/harbor, just feet off the water. On the final note of the BGM, the screen flashes white, all sound blanked. As the white flash fades, the blue beam can be seen lancing through the clouds... the clouds themselves hurridly dissipate away in a ring until it goes off frame. The beam's impact point, somewhere in the city, shows a brilliant white lense flare, even as the beam fades. Sound fades in to ocean sounds, and then an almost subsonic rumble and the camera shakes... An air shockwave can be seen sweeping the hills, and then the water approaching the camera shows the disturbance of the shockwave, it races into the camera, and when it hits, the loud crack and thunderous boom of the explosion rips into the sound, and the camera violently jolts. The point of impact of the beam continues to flare, and then gets brighter and the scene fades to white, then fades to black. Bringing the scene to a close.>

But Don't TEMPT me... I have a bad habbit of going straight to Cosmic Grade (Tier Five) attack spells when I miss with conventional orbital strikes. And Tier Five doesn't 'miss'.

Spoiler for Ouch: Too Haxx for any nanohaverse.:

I'm still trying to cut back on Excessive Use of Overkill in a Non-Overkill requiring scenerio. The Doc. says I've come a long way. Don't make me have a relapse.

Andrei: Ha~ You don't even know what real cosmic grade is... If you can beat the greatest HAXX villain of the Multiverse- Feiwang (multidimensional killing capacity, countless armies of various haxx levels, multiple selves in the countless dimensions of the multiverse, an AI capable of rewinding time and space among the least haxx of things), you have a slight chance of beating me- I'm a buffer character that basically sets the line for haxx here- Kluzie is dead so i'm the only one here right now. And on the other note- I'm immune to anything that is unknown... so, what is that lengthy piece of drama?

Sunstar Cannon >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> ATC

don't invoke haxx if you don't know the upper limit, or else... and IDS will be in order.

On the other hand let's stop this and i'll watch the LART...

[Estavali]

Originally Posted by XenahortCharybdis

*points to Hayate cowering in the corner*

Um, there. She was shafted.

Spoiler for Ehem...First Contact with the Shafted:

"No, must...resist..."

Resistance is Futile.

"Why do you want me?"

You are a shaftable being, created by another shaftable being.

*Struggle Ensues...*

"Just...DIE and leave me alone!!!!"

Death is Irrelevant.

"Aghhhh...Who are you?'

We are the Shafted.

I, for one, will be looking forward to your OCs .

Tender Loving Care
Tons of Loving Crack
Tens of Leading Crackers

Take it as you like it.

*takes notes*

Originally Posted by Keroko

When I created Syn, the plan from the very beginning was to make her Vivio's 'Fate'. So expect heavy borderline suggestive situations, and concidering Syn's bluntness, beyond borderline comments.

Though I wonder... by 'hot grown-up Vivio/Syn action' could you by chance mean... something like this?

Spoiler for quick and dirty photoshop, but it gets the point across :3:

DELICIOUS!

Blue haired. But yeah, that's Lindy. This is one of the youngest pictures I have of her, and concidering Lindy was my template for Syn to begin with, it worked just fine.

Now that's a surprise (Syn based on Lindy, that is).

The only one begging for a NanoFate was Haru (I love it when he tries the 'I lost interest in your fic' emotional blackmail route) the rest of them are curious on how things turn out.

Hmph. Seeing his expectations denied would be most enjoyable. To me at least .

Label it a Lost Logia and it should be possible. I'll give more contrsuctive critisism when I see te result.

Gotcha. Though personally I'm trying not to make it a Lost Logia. We already have quite a lot of those.

No, its not you. Syn has a lot of HxH elements oc-fied.

Phew! Glad I wasn't seeing too much into things for once .

So its a bit like creating a temporary 'guardian' right? Sounds plaussible.

Quite like the Shadow Master in Diablo II actually. Though creating an exact copy (the Doppelganger, that is) would be asking too much.

Actually, the first thing that irked me was the 'amen' trigger. Yaten no Sho has a lot of norse influences, so seeing a christian trigger sounds wrong to me.

Actually, the "Amen" part came from Judaism instead of Christianity. My take on the Belkan belief system (which may or may not be related to its magical system, but will definitely have an impact) is based on Judaism (every branch of it, including Humanistic). IIRC the Jews have been using "Amen" long before the Christians do (though it's the congregation that says "amen" as a way of affirming the person leading the prayer, like maybe Aaron saying "May Hayate be unshafted in the next Nanoha installment, if any", and the rest of us go "Amen").

Err, nonethless it's true that all this doesn't fits in the Norse theme, but unfortunately it was the best I could come up with for a trigger that has a "climatic" feel to it .

Originally Posted by LoweGear

Tomato Lettuce Cabbage?

Actually it's Tender Loving Care

Crack-inspired Love and Care is good Love and Care .

Unfortunately, the Belkarangers are even more fearless than the Linebackers are...

*Mai suddenly finds herself dressed up as Rio*

Mai: ...

Kisama da...

Asagi: Koe!!!

TAGIRE, KEMONO NO CHIKA-

*Mai pwns Asagi's head with Chainsaw for 9999 gold*

Asagi: Let me henshin first

Would she have Timebombs as well?

*runs*

The Timebomb should be available, but not to Hayate. The Black Hole maybe, since it seems to fit the Queen of the Night Sky theme. Maybe something similar to Kakashi's Mangekyou Sharigan (though that itself is pretty haxxed too imho, despite the side effects).

The Protoss Mothership, in its demo stage, was such a nice well of copy... ah, no, I mean, inspiration, of course .

Yup, that would be incredibly H4XX wouldn't it?

FIXED

*RUNS*

I see Lowe likes his Hayate in multitudes .

Originally Posted by Tormenk

Actually Tk did post here awhile ago. The two posts was his h4xbuster opinion on ATC's stuff, putting it mildly. A mod deleted both for being pointless and off-topic. What's left of the original two posts are bits and pieces quoted by me Aaron and Wild Goose about other stuff.

From the fragments I read from your quotes, what TK posted was basically typical of what he does here, and in short part of how the OC works. Was quite surprised and puzzled why the mods could have deemed it off-topic (though they might seem so for someone unfamiliar with our workings).

I had the impression Ancient Belka style had a lot of norse influence in general and brought it over to fanon as well.

The Norse theme is there, but for me I think with StrikerS, the German theme is actually more prominent, what with the Church and such. It feels as if Ancient Belkan is more towards the Norse theme while modern/Neo-Belkan is more on the German feel.

Originally Posted by Sheba

First try on a OC, it took me longer than I expected.

Spoiler for Foreword:

Hero in Disguise has brought up the idea of a TSAB Intelligence Department, along with its ranks, sections and their respective roles.
So I decided to play along.

Spoiler for Character Data:

• Personal and trivial data
  
• Name Roland Rafale
• Alignment Neutral
• Age 24 (25 after StrikerS)
• Birthdate July 28th
• Birthplace Midchildia
• Ethnicity Midchildian from french ancestry
• Bloodtype B rh+
• Hair color Blonde
• Eye color Greenish-blue
• Height 171cm
• Weight 65kg
• Likes Fine girls and a good old cognac
• Dislikes Drawing too much attention
• Favorite movie Once Upon in Time in the West
• Favorite song Where the Streets have no Name - U2
• Theorical seiyu Keiji Fujiwara
• Typical quote Come on, you are not going to punch a guy wearing eyeglasses, do you?
  
  
  
• TSAB relevant data
  
• Affiliation TSAB Intelligence Department. Section D.
• Magic rank C+, actually B
• Magic style Neo Belkan
• Magic Color Dark purple
• Main Element Shadow
• Specialization Stealth, infiltration.
• Device Armed Device Flamberge. A broad sword with a flame-like dark blue edge and a pump-shotgun mechanism built in the ricasso.

Musical Theme: Investigation of a Citizen above All Suspicion

Spoiler for Pic:

Spoiler for Generic character information:

Personality

When it comes to strangers, Roland comes as a discreet and laid back individual. He doesn't want to draw attention to him, hence he have gone for the intelligence department when he joined the TSAB.

But once he got in, he worked just enough to get to the ranks allowing him to carry his device but was severely underperforming when it comes to climb the higher ladder of the intelligence. department.

His superiors has tagged him with a slacker or "good potential but too much 'laissez aller' for any progress to ranks with a lot of responsibility" kind of label, excepted when it comes to the study of ancient relics or lost logia.

One thing was sure about him, he is a materialist, he doesn't believe much in the ideals that brought the TSAB in existence. Therefore, he was deeply involved in what seems to be harmless deals to got a little more than his usual income.

However, he is fiercely loyal to his comrades and will go to any lenght to help them.

Personal History

Roland's grandfather was a famous TSAB enforcer. His dedication to justice and great sense of honor earned the "Lion of the TSAB" nickname. Unfortunately, he fell from grace when one of his many enemies set a conspiracy in motion, leading Roland's grandfather to be framed then stripped of his enforcer rank. The grandfather was then forced to retire.

While the young Roland was an ambitious person at heart, the dishonor of his grandfather have drawn him to the conclusion that the secret of happiness is to not draw unwanted attention. Hence he never fought back when he was bullied at school. Instead, he worked harder as an apprentice mage under the relunctant teaching of his grandfather, but also as a fighter.

In school, he always ranked in fourth or fifth place, teachers has then noted about him that he was performing way under his true abilities.

The fact that he joined TSAB, in despite of the infamy left on his name, was a weird combination of luck, work and "behind the curtains" influence from the few people who believed that his grandfather could have been framed.

Upon joining the TSAB, he proved he could be a valuable trump thanks to his magic based on the manipulation of shadows as a mean to spy on people, conceal things or plain annoyance.

As for the period between before and after StrikerS:

Spoiler for to click or not to click?:

Roland has been deeply involved in the illegal trafic of relics, using his own shadow as a pocket dimension to conceal what he wanted to smuggle. He is not at the head of this shady business, being not enough intelligent for that, and have done the best he could to not get caught. As a consequence, he tries to avoid the likes of Acous but it is a matter of time before people start to talk. Because of his general behavior, suspicions over him has been on the low side of the spectrum.
He doesn't have ill intentions, his motives are purely based on money. He looks at the ideals animating the Aces with an amused look, even tho deep inside him, he envy them.
A passionate speech from any of the Ace or Strikers may be needed to bring him back to the right way.

Roland's general fighting and magic style

Roland tries to avoid direct confrontations as much as possible. In close quarter combat, he uses his fencing and savate training to avoid getting hit, occasionally using his shadow magic to pull him out of troubles called Starlight Breaker. His shadow magic was also used to paralyze opponents in the same fashion as binding spells.
Roland's shadow magic is pretty weak when used in daylight, but strong when it is nighttime or when Roland is in a very dark place.
Roland never developed a bombardement-type spell.

Roland's Armed Device

Roland's weapon with a customized Armed Device that speak French instead of German. Outisde of that, there are not any notable features about it. And that's what Roland wished.

Roland's Barrier Jacket

He never considered to design one.

Roland's view on canon characters

Nanoha A truly terrifying character. I am glad I am not under her command.

Fate I think she is too sweet for her current assignation.

Hayate Her weird antics kinda scares me.

Chrono He is okay I guess.

Yuuno A helpful lad. That's what I got from the times I met him in the Library when I needed some informations.

Lindy I admit it, age-defying mothers turns me on.

Signum Someone you dont want to fight on the battlefield.

Vita They are turning the TSAB into a kindergarten or what?

Shamal Good as a nurse, that's about it.

Zafira Hayate has the perfect bodyguard. Who can expect a dog to turn into a very capable fighter?

Reinforce Zwei What's that weird little thing?

Roland doesn't have any opinion on the other canon characters.


Design notes and inspiration

My first try at an OC in nanohaverse or any animeverse ever. I could have gone for the fierce hired killer found in many spy movie but I did not. He is loosely based on the slacker template with a "Dont want to draw unwanted attention" twist a la Kira Yoshikage from JoJo Part 4.
The pic is shamelessly ripped from a pic from Ragnarok Online.
The shadow idea is from Zato-1-One from Guilty Gear without the elements of abomination that made Zato the overpowered monster he has become.
Roland is a fairly common french name while Rafale is taken from the french aircraft.
Flamberge was the name of the sword of the french knight Renaud de Montauban.

Interesting person here . He sounds like a anti-hero, with the disillusions and preoccupation with self-benefits and keeping out of harm's way. His picture is from RO's Wizard, no?

Originally Posted by Aaron008R

Awesome work, Estavali!
The first spell just needs a bit more details on limits. But it's fine. And the second spell's HAXXful!!! And the Amen seems to contradict the Norse theme.

Churning out spells seems to be the only thing I'm good at though...

Originally Posted by tshouryuu

For that first spell, it seems fine but perhaps the doppelganger should be ranked 2-3 ranks down like that of Tracing in F/SN.

Noted.

Actually for the 2nd spell, I think its a bit on the weak side for a SSS spell as Hræsvelgr seems to have a damage radius larger than 2km already. I think you can double the damage radius.

Still too weak?

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

@ Estavali:
I like those spells. Dopple has a good set of limitations on it to keep the Shadow Clone Spam to a minimum. Incidently, are the Dopples SOLID? I can imagine a good solid dopple of someone really good at H2H combat being invaluble to her.

Solid, it is indeed. Also, as it is an exact copy of Hayate, its abilities and specialties will be thus be similar. So don't expect it to be good in melee like the Knights.

The Doppelganger will have a timer that is influenced by the temporary Linker Core that fuels its existence (well, think it as a battery, Duracell or Energizer perhaps). Once the battery life is out, the Doppelganger goes poof. Also, there's an cooldown timer that prevent Hayate from spamming Doppelgangers on and on.

Come to think of it, this thus bring forth the question whether the timer will also be influenced by how much power the Doppelganger is exerting in battle. Hmm, this could be very important.

*bakes it over in the Oven*

As for Planet Cracker, I think that while a good destructive spell, the name is misleading. At MAX size of 3 km, it's hardly city or continent cracking, let alone planet. I'd suggest a name more along the lines of 'PILLARS OF __________' Or 'WHEEL OF ________' since your two main features of this spell are pillars of pure death, that spin like a wheel.

Well, in the first place I don't expect to take this spell seriously, be it me or anyone else. The name itself is one indication; Planet Cracker sounds more like a snack than a destructive spell to me, and all of the "canon" spells I created for Hayate have German or Norse names and themes (Draupnir, Freischutz, Silberkugel, Wilde Jagd, etc). If I was really serious about this, a possible name would be Himmelsturz, and the spell will see much more restrictions from me.

Also I don't like the idea of a one-woman world destroyer. No doubt I have mulled over characters that can destroy cities with a wave of their hands, but I insist, amongst other conditions, only if they are not, or no longer are, humans. Hayate, for all the haxx I (and the rest of us) come up with, is still human and I fully intend to keep her within human limitations. Even Superman has his limits, and Hayate is clearly not Superman.

Originally Posted by Kagerou

XDDD I love this character. Sounds like a giant ball of energy .

I think we all concur on that .

Well, it is disjointed, to be fair. However, it shows a concurrence. The first three plots, and then the fourth, all happen at the same time; The Out of Shadow/Into Light arc (Nanoha and Vivio's) is meant to be full of drama with a little action to punctuate said drama, and builds up our title character for the second half of the story. The second arc, White Tempest, is a giant information dump that not only gives a certain character time in the limelight (*coughcoughHayatecoughcough*), but will allow the reader to understand what the hell is going on, especially during the second half (it could be said that some of the info found in this arc would be required lest the plot make no sense XD).

The Third Arc (Unnamed as of now), focuses on the OFM, mine and Goose's OCs, although there is light interception of other people's OCs (Keroko's first appearance in the story actually starts off this arc), and provides another backdrop; one that will become integral to the story proper, especially in the second half. Finally, the Investigation of Sin arc, one that doesn't actually start for a couple chapters, focuses on what I believe to be an unlikely duo (Fate and Acous, later Teana) gallavanting throughout Ordered Space to try and solve a few mysteries. This arc is intended to be borderline thriller/mystery with a good bit of survival horror thrown in for good measure.

Moving on, as you've noted, and as Keroko says later, I believe, Syn is to Fate as Vivio is to Nanoha. Innuendo is over nine-thousand.

I see .

I'm loving both of them. Doppelganger might be useful... >.>

Glad you (and most of the rest) like them . Doppelganger actually came out from a Divine-Hammered inspiration when I was mentally going through a fierce 1-on-1 aerial battle between her and her "rival", under the influence of "Art du Sabre" (track 3 of the SnS II OST, an incredible piece of orchestral music).

XDDD How sexy :3 .
Vivio: "...not gonna happen."
Syn: "Oh come on~"
Vivio: *blushing* "S-SYN!!!"
Syn: "Ahaha~ Easy to tease as ever, V."

Don't you just this sort of girl-to-girl interactions?

As Goose and I did with the OFM, though really it was he and TK that hammered out those details. I suck when it comes to stuff like that, I just write stories (It's not that I don't do the research, I just make others do it for me .)

It's certainly a good workable system .

Originally Posted by Keroko

I agree, the name is really misleading. Also, Planet Cracker doesn't sound really like Hayate.

Hmm, I agree. In any case, Planet Cracker (if it somehow makes its way into plot proper) will be something similar to what Kuzu-ryusen is in Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu, a byproduct that leads to her ultimate spell. Whatever that may be.

Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki

So I guess that means the last 50% of Asuka is 100% pure...cuteness?

*runs*

Heh, so that's what the 50% meant? I thought he was refering to people who are 50% (and thus not all) woman....

Interesting...so is that an Easy Bake model?
Spells seem to fit her combat style...and I don't want to get in her way when she uses Planet Cracker

Well, as long as you have enough Pylons...

Easy Bake?

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

TK isn't here! He's not around! But in our hearts and in our haxbuster rifles, he lives in OC still! So long as this heart beats, the spirit of Haxbuster lives in me!

Goose, you sound as if he's dead or what...

...right, basically, spell No. 2 is much HAX. Keroko-kun mentioned the dichotomy in using "Amen" as the trigger; also, there is no freakin' way a single mage can do this... at least, as far as we've seen. So far. It's most assuredly hax and too overpowered.

If you have to ask if it's overpowered, it probably is. If you have to ask if it's hax, it most likely is. Remember that, people!

Well, definitely not a single mage of course. I'm not that crack-infested yet.

That's where the Doppelganger comes in handy...

But seriously, I myself don't think it's really combat-viable in the first place. Firstly the long charge-up time and that very visible, oversized Hexagram is enough to send the people it's supposed to wipe out running long before the actual stuff comes down like Holy Fury. Unless Hayate plans to go into demolition business, this actually won't be very helpful in most situations.

Secondly the amount of mana consumed is just crazy. Even at Hayate's max output, this spell still needs to drain energy from the surroundings. What if she collapses after the firing? Or worse, what if she collapses during the firing? Just imagine how much damage the berserk energy storm would cause in such a scenario.

Btw, Happy Lunar New Year!!! For the Chinese amongst us (including me), may your ang-paos be fat and plentiful!

[Evangelion Xgouki]

Originally Posted by Estavali

Easy Bake?

[LimitedEternal]

Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki

Well. You actually posted an Easy-Bake oven. I'm speechless

Now, someone has to shop it to a Nano-Bake oven. (So as to keep it on topic, of course!) Send a potential spell or set of magic in, and it comes out freshly crack-baked prepared with the -verse's finest in creative magic.

By the way, the new magic for Hayate sounds really good. A distraction spell (EXACTLY what a melee-lacking fighter needs), and another nuke...keep up the good work. (And unfortunately, I can't find who originally made those spells, so kudos and sorry...)

[Evangelion Xgouki]

Guess it's time I start my own division...

Designation: Division 66, NERV

Affiliation: TSAB Ground Forces

Founded: May MC 071

Commander: Colonel Kouzou Fuyutsuki

HQ Location: Cranagan, Mid-Childa

Equipment: 1x XI Class Warship Longinus, 2x JF-700 Helicopter

Function: Locate, secure, and neutralize rogue Lost Logia/Relics within Mid-Childa as well as high-threat Lost Logia/Relics on other worlds.

History: Division 66 was founded in May MC 071 shortly after the airport disaster. Although it had been proposed just a month prior, the proximity and scale of the Lost Logia/Relic airport incident made it clear to the TSAB council that an organization would be necessary to police local threats to avoid another disaster. The original proposal was drafted and backed by Lt. General Regius Gaiz and as such is under the direct control of the TSAB Ground Forces. This also limited the range of movement of the organization to Mid-Childa, although a clause was later added to allow their jurisdiction to reach to other worlds should there be a potential high-level threat.

The overall division is quite small due to its specialized objectives. They occupy a single 2-story structure just outside the main TSAB Ground Forces HQ with a pair of hangers for the helicopters and a single training structure in the rear. As of their founding, the main forward forces consist of 1st LT. Shamsel Nagisa and 2nd LT. Ryotaro Nogami. Some questioned the use of an experimental system for such an organization, but they were all quickly dismissed by Lt. Gen. Gaiz saying that it was a proven system he had investigated himself and worthy of such a roll.

Despite the intentions of the division, there were several rumors questioning its founding. One sprung from the fact that, after being initially set aside by the Council as not a priority, the airport disaster occurred and practically paved the way for its rushed approval. Second was on the backer, Lt. Gen. Gaiz. Rumors already existed of his dislike for the Navy as well as of the young Hayate Yagami. Many found it odd for him to propose such a group when word spread of Hayate contemplating a similar division of her own.

[Sheba]

Originally Posted by tshouryuu

Looks interesting and quite well done imho. Not too sure about that shadow magics but I'll wait to see what definite spells and abilities he has first before commenting on it. Also, is his device a gunblade? Sounds like one to me.

I have been flipping thru both Vampire the Masquerade (Lasombra clan) and D&D3 rulebooks to find spells that could be twisted into nanohaverse fit spells.

Later this week, I may post them and discuss over how to tone down those that are too much for his mage rank and character type.

I count on HAXXbusters!

Originally Posted by Kagerou

Very nice for a first try! I'm not seeing anything wrong at all in terms of power and ability, and he doesn't even seem to be connected to the OCs, save for Yuuno by a little bit.

You get bonus points for the name Rafale as well. .

When the canon characters will get their noses in his business, expect him to run away or trying to put them on the wrong track.

As for the name, I have been mindstorming for french names while keeping the nanoha naming gimmick about the cars/vehicles/weapon (?) references.

Originally Posted by Keroko

Heeeh? An antagonist, huh? That certainly increases the interest rate of this character tremendously. Is he by chance the one responsible for the Relic incident at the airport?

It depends on when the Relic airport incident happened. Four years ago before StrikerS takes place? So it is not unlikely he have been involved, even tho it have been an accident (transaction that have gone wrong, etc...)

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

I like how this charecter isn't too powerful, is trying not to make waves, and is actually a bad guy. *grins* And so long as he keeps a low profile, the OFM aren't going to be after him - unless he's a lead to bigger fish that they want to fry. Good first try, and bonus points for being named after the fighter. ^__^

I remember that Jojo's Bizarre Adventures' author said that villains turns out that way because they never manage to overcome their own fears/weaknesses/complex.
I wanted to give him a reason for his general behavior without dwelling too much into pathos, and without turning him into a mental wreck. I am hoping I have done it right.

Originally Posted by Estavali

Interesting person here . He sounds like a anti-hero, with the disillusions and preoccupation with self-benefits and keeping out of harm's way. His picture is from RO's Wizard, no?

You are right. While he comes as an antagonist, there are a hope for him to be reformed befriended, and someone very bossy to push his skills to the limit.

And his pic is definitely from the RO high wizard.


PS: Keiji Fujiwara (Hugues from FMA, Takeshi from sola, Sven from Black Cat and Aizawa from Death Note) is THE seiyu for slacker type characters.