Dating

[Kusa-San]

Originally Posted by Yoko Takeo

. Anyways, I'm thinking, since I have to see her again one last time (without the other guy there in fact), maybe I should take a chance to get to know her better and see how that goes.

Thoughts anyone?

And yes, this is the first time I post here to talk about my own situation

Yep, I think you should do that and take your ime to know her well. Maybe she will be the one but maybe not. Anyway, good luck

[DragoZERO]

Don't judge it based on the fact that you think she looks at you more than the other guy. There could be a lot of different reasons, not even remotely related to romance, for that. So just talk to her and flirt a little and gauge her interest level a little. If its the last time you'll see her I guess your goal should be to get some digits or something.

[Kakashi]

^ I agree, the staring could mean a number of things. I would ask her out for a coffee next time you see her and then maybe take it from there.

[Mi-Roo]

Bah! Dating. I've had such horrible experiances.
This guy once acted like he was all interested in me
and asked me on a date. Turned out that it was a dare,
he dumped me a week later and got £50 out of it.

..Nice. >>;

To top it off, he said he got "physical" with me
so I was now carrying his child and that he even
payed me for the sex. A few weeks after rumours
and looks of disgust off other students in my school,
he then turns back to me and asks to go on another date.
Srsly, wth? I told him where to shove it.

Then the stalking and constint stream of gifts followed.
Of course, I just denied to give him even a mere glance.
The swine. >____<;

[Crusader]

Originally Posted by Kakashi

^ I agree, the staring could mean a number of things. I would ask her out for a coffee next time you see her and then maybe take it from there.

I once miss read a stare, namely because i had a leaf in my hair, which i didn't know about.

Yoko Takeo Looks literally can be deceiving... If you're staring at her and she's staring at you...sounds a bit akward not romantic lol. Is she stealing looks or is she blantantly looking at you without trying to hide it? Lastly is there something unsightly about you? kidding lol

Elda
You think thats bad, i dated a girl for a week and the second day she wrote me a letter saying she wanted to have sex, but the text was pretty nasty lol. I told her no and she carved our name in a tree at school, said we had sex there,even left used condoms there (i didn't use them, thats for sure), then told people that i could barely get it up and i was gay. nearly ruined me. The only reason i agreed to date her, is because she was bigger and physicaly stronger than me, She could have beat me pretty good, needless to say i was/is a coward lol.

[Tsuyoshi]

Originally Posted by Crusader

I once miss read a stare, namely because i had a leaf in my hair, which i didn't know about.

Yoko Takeo Looks literally can be deceiving... If you're staring at her and she's staring at you...sounds a bit akward not romantic lol. Is she stealing looks or is she blantantly looking at you without trying to hide it? Lastly is there something unsightly about you? kidding lol

She's not really staring. I may have worded it wrong. Sometimes, she looks toward me, other times she may look at the other guy, sometimes she's referring to her notes or what not. I would say she's holding a conversation, not actually staring. Anyways, I'm prolly gonna behave friendly with her and go with the flow. It's really too soon to say anything about anything right now. It's just something I noticed.

[Cipher]

Originally Posted by Yoko Takeo

She's not really staring. I may have worded it wrong. Sometimes, she looks toward me, other times she may look at the other guy, sometimes she's referring to her notes or what not. I would say she's holding a conversation, not actually staring. Anyways, I'm prolly gonna behave friendly with her and go with the flow. It's really too soon to say anything about anything right now. It's just something I noticed.

Sorry, its probably nothing worth concern. But it doesn't matter, If you like her, take immediate action. It's not with the looks, its with the persona you show during the date.

[RadiantBeam]

Originally Posted by Yoko Takeo

She's not really staring. I may have worded it wrong. Sometimes, she looks toward me, other times she may look at the other guy, sometimes she's referring to her notes or what not. I would say she's holding a conversation, not actually staring. Anyways, I'm prolly gonna behave friendly with her and go with the flow. It's really too soon to say anything about anything right now. It's just something I noticed.

Go with the flow and see what happens. I wish you luck.

[stubby42]

Slight update time.

Most of you probably wont remember (it was a good while ago, about a month around page 94 and 95) but I took a random trip to durham to go see a friend, we ended up hanging out with all of his mates and the long and short of it was that I met a girl who ranked ultra high on the what stubby finds attractive list.

Well I after I got home I asked her out (p.s thanks guys for the help with that), she said no but said we could be friends, which wasnt want I was going for but I'm happy because I actually did something for once.


update time

So I traveled back to durham this weekend for a weekend of awesomeness, not really expecting anything. I hadnt talked to the girl since the asking out, so I was fair certain she'd either disapear for the weekend or it would be akward.

But true to her word she hung out all weekend, hell the only person I saw more of than her was the friend I was staying with (she even hung out when it was just me and my mate) and it wasnt akward (well ok there were a few akward moments, but that was when we were alone together but theres only so much you can talk about when your bored out of your mind watching friends compete in a pool tournemant).

she made it very clear that all we are is friends (she wasnt touchy, if we were in a large group she didnt sit next to me) and I'd should be happy with that but the truth is I'm not.

Maybe I've had time to build her up as a dream girl but if thats true but arent you supposed to be disapointed when you see reality? because she keeps getting even better, how many girls do you know who want/are training to be a marine arechologist? (if she achieves her goal she will explore ship wrecks for a living).

I dont really know why I'm writing this (probably because I have the flu), I know I cant make her feel the same way about me as I do about her but I guess what I'm saying is I'm having trouble getting past that and just be friends.

truth is, I shouldnt really be thinking about this because of the distance, after this year the odds of seeing her again are low. I live about 4 hours away during term time then when school is finished its even further. Its her final year of university so everyones course load is getting heavier and heavier so my trips up will have to get less frequent (till the point that they end) but I dont want to loose her as a friend seeing as we've really only just reached that point.



yeah so um I'm probably going to sleep cause I called in sick from work.

[Ascaloth]

Originally Posted by stubby42

Slight update time.

Most of you probably wont remember (it was a good while ago, about a month around page 94 and 95) but I took a random trip to durham to go see a friend, we ended up hanging out with all of his mates and the long and short of it was that I met a girl who ranked ultra high on the what stubby finds attractive list.

Well I after I got home I asked her out (p.s thanks guys for the help with that), she said no but said we could be friends, which wasnt want I was going for but I'm happy because I actually did something for once.


update time

So I traveled back to durham this weekend for a weekend of awesomeness, not really expecting anything. I hadnt talked to the girl since the asking out, so I was fair certain she'd either disapear for the weekend or it would be akward.

But true to her word she hung out all weekend, hell the only person I saw more of than her was the friend I was staying with (she even hung out when it was just me and my mate) and it wasnt akward (well ok there were a few akward moments, but that was when we were alone together but theres only so much you can talk about when your bored out of your mind watching friends compete in a pool tournemant).

she made it very clear that all we are is friends (she wasnt touchy, if we were in a large group she didnt sit next to me) and I'd should be happy with that but the truth is I'm not.

Maybe I've had time to build her up as a dream girl but if thats true but arent you supposed to be disapointed when you see reality? because she keeps getting even better, how many girls do you know who want/are training to be a marine arechologist? (if she achieves her goal she will explore ship wrecks for a living).

I dont really know why I'm writing this (probably because I have the flu), I know I cant make her feel the same way about me as I do about her but I guess what I'm saying is I'm having trouble getting past that and just be friends.

truth is, I shouldnt really be thinking about this because of the distance, after this year the odds of seeing her again are low. I live about 4 hours away during term time then when school is finished its even further. Its her final year of university so everyones course load is getting heavier and heavier so my trips up will have to get less frequent (till the point that they end) but I dont want to loose her as a friend seeing as we've really only just reached that point.



yeah so um I'm probably going to sleep cause I called in sick from work.

*pats*

Good one, man. Sorry it didn't work out, but well that's life for you, and at least you tried. I haven't got much left to tell you, except maybe time and distance will help you get over her eventually.

[Narona]

Originally Posted by Cipher

Disagreed. A man ( or woman ) determines her/himself not his/her company. For example, a person living in a dangerous place does not mean a dangerous person. Although there are "tendencies", nonetheless, in the end, it is the individual that decides.

What ???

I didn't mean "company" like, for example, "the company called Microsoft"

Furthermore, to be alone is to not have the opportunity of mental discipline and experience. Thus, IMO, its better to be in any company than alone----we are, yes, social-needing beings. And just like food, we need company---doesn't matter about the taste, as long as its edible.

Istrongly disagree with such statement. You're implying that it is better in the worst case to be with people who hurt you physically and/or mentally, than being alone.

Originally Posted by whitepearl

Sound advice that I have been following unknowingly for a long time...

To be 100% sure to not be misunderstood, I was mainly talking about Friends.

- You don't need a billion of friends. What's better: 1 person on which you can count on, and that you can trust, or 10 persons that will throw you away like an old rag because, for example you dared saying that you like/watch Animes? I still try to figure how people can call those jerks (the latter) Friends. And the ones that will also throw you away to keep a certain "reputation" in the eyes of the jerks are not less jerk.

- You don't need to be in a rush to make friends, especially if it means to lie/hide things (of course, I talk about harmless things like "being an animes fan") about you, or to do things that you dislike just to be seen as worthy by a bunch of useless intolerants.

[Cipher]

Originally Posted by Narona

I strongly disagree with such statement. You're implying that it is better in the worst case to be with people who hurt you physically and/or mentally, than being alone.

Either way, being alone will also wound you physically and/or mentally. It turns you mentally unstable and it deprives you of outside help when physically ill. What only makes this "lone" situation better is its time length.

I don't really consider people who would intentionally hurt you as "company". More-like, harassers. And I can' really think of anyone joining such. (except perhaps masochist.)

I thought it was out of context but if its this type of "bad", then perhaps your right. But if its just drug-addicted or drunkard friends, then the controls to whether participate or not is in your hands.

[Mystique]

Originally Posted by Narona

To be 100% sure to not be misunderstood, I was mainly talking about Friends.

- You don't need a billion of friends. What's better: 1 person on which you can count on, and that you can trust, or 10 persons that will throw you away like an old rag because, for example you dared saying that you like/watch Animes? I still try to figure how people can call those jerks (the latter) Friends. And the ones that will also throw you away to keep a certain "reputation" in the eyes of the jerks are not less jerk.

- You don't need to be in a rush to make friends, especially if it means to lie/hide things (of course, I talk about harmless things like "being an animes fan") about you, or to do things that you dislike just to be seen as worthy by a bunch of useless intolerants.

Nonetheless, it applies very very aptly to relationships.
"It's better to be alone than in bad company"

If you cannot live life with just yourself and be content with who you are, rather than wanting to seek someone outta sheer lonliness, despair or boredom, then a person is likely to attract the wrong kinda partners.

If there's one thing I'm liking about this thread lately, is that peeps are seeing that the 'finding a partner' isn't so easy as one may think nor is it so 'impossible' either.
It takes hard work to not only approach or take steps to get to the couple stage, but then to learn to live with each other (or get along since most here are still students), takes even more time and energy.

Thus it begins with you.
Being comfortable with who you are as a sole person means most of the work is done.
If you don't like yourself or focus on your advantages and highlight those, then how are other humans meant to see the good in ya then?
If there are skills you feel you lack on, brush up on them, gain confidence and enjoy life in the meantime.

Relationships are meant to 'enhance and enrich' not 'replace' certain aspects of your life that you may feel is missing.

[Tsuyoshi]

Originally Posted by Cipher

Either way, being alone will also wound you physically and/or mentally. It turns you mentally unstable and it deprives you of outside help when physically ill. What only makes this "lone" situation better is its time length.

And being with an abusive company doesn't do that? Being in that sort of company can be physically damaging and can also be traumatizing, making you distrust people in general. Also, being with the wrong kind of people can influence you and you can become like them: abusive, selfish, not caring about other's feelings. Being with bad people can also make you a bad person. The common term would be peer pressure.

[Cipher]

Originally Posted by Yoko Takeo

Being with bad people can also make you a bad person. The common term would be peer pressure.

That factor lies entirely on the individual. Even with peer pressure, the end decision is created depending on the nature of the individual. You can be good among bad people, they may influence you but you will also act as influence. But in the end, its up to the individuals.

[stubby42]

Originally Posted by Ascaloth

*pats*

Good one, man. Sorry it didn't work out, but well that's life for you, and at least you tried. I haven't got much left to tell you, except maybe time and distance will help you get over her eventually.

Thanks man and I know time and distance will eventually do the job but I dont know I guess part of me doesnt want to get over her.

I'm in a really strange point in my life where I have to make a lot of big descisions about my future but I'm also stuck in a rut.

I'm graduating from university tommorow (but I finished in august) and I've been working very hard in two crappy jobs for little pay, I'm in debt (a little to the bank, more to the parents) and I dont really know anyone outside of work, I was always in a small group to begin with but I'm the only one who graduated this year.

She was pretty much the only good thing going on in my life right now.

I guess thats why I'm finding this so tough.

[Samari]

Originally Posted by Ascaloth

*pats*

Good one, man. Sorry it didn't work out, but well that's life for you, and at least you tried. I haven't got much left to tell you, except maybe time and distance will help you get over her eventually.

True. Plenty of fish in the sea. And that is probably the most accurate common phrase I've ever heard in my life.

[deathreape98]

Originally Posted by Samari

Plenty of fish in the sea.

Until pollution kills them all.



Anybody here mind telling me why people feel that dating as teenagers is necessary? No matter which angle I look at it from, save one, I can only see it as pointless. Anybody want to share their thoughts?

[Dextro]

Originally Posted by deathreape98

Anybody here mind telling me why people feel that dating as teenagers is necessary? No matter which angle I look at it from, save one, I can only see it as pointless. Anybody want to share their thoughts?

I for one think it helps one grow as a person. You experience first hand that life isn't all sunshine and fairy-tales and you gain valuable experience for your future interactions with members of the opposite sex. Of course that's just my opinion and everyone is different so take it as you wish.

[deathreape98]

Originally Posted by Dextro

I for one think it helps one grow as a person. You experience first hand that life isn't all sunshine and fairy-tales and you gain valuable experience for your future interactions with members of the opposite sex. Of course that's just my opinion and everyone is different so take it as you wish.

I can understand that. My sole experience in such dating made me realize how worthless such things are, after all.