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Old 2010-10-10, 21:43   Link #3921
Bikerider
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No plans right now to make a collected post with my snapshots. thx
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Old 2010-10-13, 18:13   Link #3922
Blue Pentacle
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Hi there,


I am glad and very contented to bring some nice news. I would like to thank all those who read, reviewed and offered much helpful support in the past months during the thick, and thin, times . As always, your help has been of great value to me and is appreciated deeply .


Now, I am very pleased to offer the second part of chapter five of "Strange Consorts" for the forum.


Quote:
Spoiler for Strange Consorts Chp. 5 (Part 2):



Thanks again,


Blue Pentacle.
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Old 2010-10-14, 07:58   Link #3923
Shiek927
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It was too late last night for me to write anything large, but now I can, thanks for waiting

Ahh, the moment of truth arrived; I have to be honest, all throughout the chapter, I thought she was going to kill Raki. I just had that vibe throughout the whole thing; perhaps because we've known about her fears that no relationship could ever work out if he inevitably found out what she was, but It didn't happen, which I didn't complain about at all.

Raki fainting, I have to admit, was kind of stretched; you seem to imply if he fell into a coma after his shock because he contracted an illness; It still feels kind of pushing it. I mean, she even bathes him and he still doesn't wake up? How can a shock and/or an illness put someone in a state like that? Now, you don't really explain what exactly he contracted, but regardless, I feel like I had to use my imagination during that.

This whole chapter was full of memorable moments; my favorite, no doubt, was Luciella walking outside in the middle of the rain because she didn't want Raki to see her cry; I don't think any moment in your entire story before this one truly sums up the effect Raki has had on her.

Luciella "killing" Raki's illness was an interesting idea, a shame that's not how it works in real-life . Whereas before, I saw some similiarities for Teresa and Claire, they largely continue. New references though, like Raki learning how to fight with Luciella instead of Isley were new and I enjoyed them just as well. You imply Alicia's awakening and Raki finally hears the truth about everything. In summation, you tie alot of loose-ends in this chapter, which I feel you purposely did because the story is turning in a completely new direction.

I feel like the entire story has been leading up to this one moment....now, I have absolutely idea where the story will go, which makes me all the more excited
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Old 2010-10-14, 14:50   Link #3924
revan5
Dark Lord of Animesuki
 
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: The Kingdom of Orange...you can't beat the Cuse, in basketball or snowfall!
http://www.fanfiction.net/anime/Clay.../0/5043/1/0/1/

Only 10 days in and I'm up to 325 hits and 150 visitors! Holy smokes! Shiek, FYI, the latest (and greatest) versions of the chapters are now being posted on fanfiction.net. Why? Well mainly because it's a huge pain editing Animesuki posts when ff.net does the time-consuming part of separating out the paragraphs for you. Consider yourself fairly warned! I'm up to chapter 3 already (and updating weekly), so I'd wait for the updated chapter 6 on ff.net, review that, and post your review here if you like. I'm up to the 4th chapter as of this posting time.
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How the warriors of Claymore OUGHT to look: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12541
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12530
"So Shiek, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!"

Last edited by revan5; 2010-10-14 at 19:59.
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Old 2010-10-14, 23:26   Link #3925
Blue Pentacle
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Hi Shiek927,


Thank you very kindly for having the patience to review the chapter. I do appreciate it.


You highlighted several points of importance, which are both interesting and deserve further elaboration .


In regards to Raki collapsing, I can appreciate that it seemed maybe a little far fetched, though one must keep in mind several factors before reducing it to mere convenience.


Raki had been travelling north for some weeks, with little food or sustainence, exposed to the elements and with limited oppertunity for good hygiene. This would have already taken its toll on a young body, when compounded by the fear and simple power of discovering such a awful truth; a fact which alone would leave quite an impression on a healthy human being in that position.


Also, in regards to Luciela slaying Raki's illness, though this might be a self-defeating statement, is that it is a insight into the dreams of both sleepers; suggestive of their respective states and conditions - which in Luciela's case was fear and impotence over Raki's health .


Further, I am very glad that you enjoyed the work as a whole and that it has raised questions over the future of the two; though I was initally very curious as to why you thought she might kill him, by such a late chapter? Still, I am pleased for your stance and would hope that the concept continues to compel you in the future .


Thanks,


Blue Pentacle.
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Old 2010-10-16, 21:49   Link #3926
revan5
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Spoiler for "The Silver-eyed Empress" Chapter 5, part 1:
__________________


How the warriors of Claymore OUGHT to look: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12541
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12530
"So Shiek, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!"
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Old 2010-10-16, 21:58   Link #3927
revan5
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Spoiler for "The Silver-eyed Empress" Chapter 5, part 2:
__________________


How the warriors of Claymore OUGHT to look: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12541
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12530
"So Shiek, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!"
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Old 2010-10-16, 22:17   Link #3928
revan5
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Spoiler for "The Silver-eyed Empress" Chapter 6, part 1:
__________________


How the warriors of Claymore OUGHT to look: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12541
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12530
"So Shiek, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!"
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Old 2010-10-16, 22:29   Link #3929
revan5
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Spoiler for "The Silver-eyed Empress" Chapter 6, part 2:
__________________


How the warriors of Claymore OUGHT to look: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12541
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12530
"So Shiek, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!"
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Old 2010-10-16, 22:39   Link #3930
revan5
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: The Kingdom of Orange...you can't beat the Cuse, in basketball or snowfall!

"Claymore: New Era"


Prologue:http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3811

Chapter 1: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3788
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3789

Chapter 2: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3791
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3792

Chapter 3: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3793
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3794

Chapter 4: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3795
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3796

Chapter 5: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3806
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3807

Chapter 6: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3808
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3809

Chapter 7: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3816
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3817

Chapter 8: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3842
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3843

Chapter 9: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3845
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3846

Please note that even though "Claymore: New Era" is completed, I am still accepting constructive critiques and reviews at this time. (You can find even better versions of several chapters already on fanfiction.net: http://www.fanfiction.net/anime/Clay.../0/5043/1/0/1/) I will be updating the ff.net chapters weekly with the latest and greatest versions, so I would urge you to read them there. You can send me or post your reviews here however.

In the meantime I'll be steadily constructing "The Silver-eyed Empress" Section with new posts. The seven chapters so far come out to around 120 pages in MS Word, so be warned it is fairly epic.



"The Silver-eyed Empress"

Prologue: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3871

Chapter 1: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3873
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3874

Chapter 2: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3878
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3879

Chapter 3: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3892
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3893

Chapter 4: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3894
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3895

Chapter 5: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3927
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3928

Chapter 6: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3929
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3930
__________________


How the warriors of Claymore OUGHT to look: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12541
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12530
"So Shiek, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!"

Last edited by revan5; 2010-10-23 at 22:58.
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Old 2010-10-17, 18:02   Link #3931
Bikerider
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Join Date: Jun 2007
meanwhile just as the battle for Rabona ends

Dietrich looks around in amazement at the carnage.

Helen wraps her arm over Dee's sholders; "Hey Shorty! Wasn't that fun ? You had fun right ?"

Yuma: "I had fun !"
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Old 2010-10-23, 22:46   Link #3932
revan5
Dark Lord of Animesuki
 
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: The Kingdom of Orange...you can't beat the Cuse, in basketball or snowfall!
Spoiler for "The Silver-eyed Empress" Chapter 7, part 1:
__________________


How the warriors of Claymore OUGHT to look: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12541
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12530
"So Shiek, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!"
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Old 2010-10-23, 22:57   Link #3933
revan5
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: The Kingdom of Orange...you can't beat the Cuse, in basketball or snowfall!
Spoiler for "The Silver-eyed Empress" Chapter 7, part 2:
__________________


How the warriors of Claymore OUGHT to look: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12541
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12530
"So Shiek, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!"
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Old 2010-10-23, 23:01   Link #3934
revan5
Dark Lord of Animesuki
 
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: The Kingdom of Orange...you can't beat the Cuse, in basketball or snowfall!

"Claymore: New Era"


Prologue:http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3811

Chapter 1: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3788
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3789

Chapter 2: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3791
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3792

Chapter 3: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3793
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3794

Chapter 4: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3795
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3796

Chapter 5: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3806
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3807

Chapter 6: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3808
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3809

Chapter 7: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3816
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3817

Chapter 8: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3842
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3843

Chapter 9: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3845
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3846

Please note that even though "Claymore: New Era" is completed, I am still accepting constructive critiques and reviews at this time. (You can find even better versions of several chapters already on fanfiction.net: http://www.fanfiction.net/anime/Clay.../0/5043/1/0/1/) I will be updating the ff.net chapters weekly with the latest and greatest versions, so I would urge you to read them there. You can send me or post your reviews here however.

In the meantime I'll be steadily constructing "The Silver-eyed Empress" Section with new posts. The eight chapters so far come out to around 141 pages in MS Word, so be warned it is fairly epic.



"The Silver-eyed Empress"

Prologue: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3871

Chapter 1: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3873
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3874

Chapter 2: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3878
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3879

Chapter 3: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3892
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3893

Chapter 4: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3894
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3895

Chapter 5: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3927
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3928

Chapter 6: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3929
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3930

Chapter 7: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3933
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=3934
__________________


How the warriors of Claymore OUGHT to look: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12541
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12530
"So Shiek, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!"
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Old 2010-10-23, 23:50   Link #3935
FormerAbyssalone
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^Damn Revan, it looks like I've got some catching up 2 do!
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Old 2010-10-25, 14:57   Link #3936
Blue Pentacle
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Hi There,


I hope everyone is well on the forum, since last time, and I am glad that the current chapter of "Strange Consorts" was enjoyed; my thanks to Shiek927 for their considerate feedback and encouragement, throughout the work .


I have a little news and something new to bring to the forum today, which might interest some .


For the moment, "Strange Consorts" will be taking a bit of a break; I have a good scheme of future stories for the Abyssal and the boy, but there are other demands on my attention and time, which will grow in the forseeable future. Later, I hope to return to the story and hopefully expand upon what has already passed between Luciela and Raki.


Also, I have been pondering a bit, as I am inclined too, and have been courting a interesting idea; which has appeared in the past, but has since subsided in the comings and goings on the forum.


Again, I would like to thank those who considered a more Yuma focused work earlier, as that is still being researched, though, for the moment, I would like to return to that old classic of pairings; in particular Raki X ?


In this case, I have been thinking of the consequences if it was not Clare who allowed Raki to follow on, but Yuma...


Any perspectives or opinions on this would be very welcome as you see fit.


Thanks,


Blue Pentacle.
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Old 2010-10-25, 15:31   Link #3937
Weird D
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blue Pentacle View Post
Hi There,


I hope everyone is well on the forum, since last time, and I am glad that the current chapter of "Strange Consorts" was enjoyed; my thanks to Shiek927 for their considerate feedback and encouragement, throughout the work .


I have a little news and something new to bring to the forum today, which might interest some .


For the moment, "Strange Consorts" will be taking a bit of a break; I have a good scheme of future stories for the Abyssal and the boy, but there are other demands on my attention and time, which will grow in the forseeable future. Later, I hope to return to the story and hopefully expand upon what has already passed between Luciela and Raki.


Also, I have been pondering a bit, as I am inclined too, and have been courting a interesting idea; which has appeared in the past, but has since subsided in the comings and goings on the forum.


Again, I would like to thank those who considered a more Yuma focused work earlier, as that is still being researched, though, for the moment, I would like to return to that old classic of pairings; in particular Raki X ?


In this case, I have been thinking of the consequences if it was not Clare who allowed Raki to follow on, but Yuma...


Any perspectives or opinions on this would be very welcome as you see fit.


Thanks,


Blue Pentacle.
Sorry for the lack of feedback, it's just that I'm a crappy reviewer; I tend to focus more on 'enjoyment' rather than 'criticism' Still I really enjoyed the last chapter.

Anyway, for this new idea, a good point of focus would be the difference in how Yuma sees herself and how Raki would see her. Yuma's unique because she's insecure in her abilities and feels inadequate, something that even Clare, or Clarice, never showed despite being considered failures. On the other hand, Raki would simply believe in Yuma's abilities, regardless of what happens, and of how she does in battle.

Another point is that Yuma sees herself as expendable and, due to this, probably doesn't care much whether she lives or not (as seen when the Ghosts leave the North). So you'd have to establish Raki as her strongest (maybe even only) reason to survive, and think of how such a bond would change her as a person.

Noy much I know, but that's all I can think of.
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Old 2010-10-25, 18:22   Link #3938
Shiek927
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Dany pretty much summed up my thoughts; you're breaking new ground Blue simply by making a Yuma-centric fic since I can't actually think of one off the top of my head.

Go for it! ^_^
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Last edited by Shiek927; 2010-10-26 at 18:13.
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Old 2010-10-25, 18:29   Link #3939
revan5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shiek927 View Post
Dany pretty much summed up my thoughts; you're breaking new ground Blue simply by making a Yuma-centric fic since I can't actually think of one off the top of my head.

Go for it! ^_^
Ahem Shiek, somebody forgot to mention a certain Dark Lord having the only fanfic on ff.net that has Renee as a major supporting character. Go ahead and check. Yep, it's the only one! Nice to have two authors breaking totally new ground for your sake. Expect ff.net version of "Claymore: New Era" chapter 6 to be up sometime this weekend btw. It'll be worth the wait, I assure you.
__________________


How the warriors of Claymore OUGHT to look: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12541
http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...ostcount=12530
"So Shiek, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!"
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Old 2010-10-25, 18:46   Link #3940
Shiek927
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Quote:
Originally Posted by revan5 View Post
Ahem Shiek, somebody forgot to mention a certain Dark Lord having the only fanfic on ff.net that has Renee as a major supporting character. Go ahead and check. Yep, it's the only one! Nice to have two authors breaking totally new ground for your sake. Expect ff.net version of "Claymore: New Era" chapter 6 to be up sometime this weekend btw. It'll be worth the wait, I assure you.
Your fic doesn't count Revan . Is Renee the main character of your story? Is it a centric fic where nearly the entire story is centered around her, her character and development?

You can't have an epic starring many characters and call it the same thing; regardless you do a nice job with development in your story
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