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Old 2012-02-12, 07:53   Link #21841
Eratas123
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@ Senpai - It wasn't Karon. It was the drone attacking both of them. Irish even talks to Karon midway and tells her to hurry the eff up before he gets killed.

Side note : Operation Cake eater
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Old 2012-02-12, 07:54   Link #21842
demino_hellsin
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Well I'm not sure if Ichika will be acting like a casanova he's more like a house husband actually
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Old 2012-02-12, 07:57   Link #21843
Eratas123
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It still fits. Unless you want to call it operation SHotacon or something.
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Old 2012-02-12, 07:57   Link #21844
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On that note, it's not like Snake want to eat... actual snake for fun, it's really dire. So, we can say Ichika also doesn't want to eat "Christmas Cakes" but do it anyway.
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:02   Link #21845
demino_hellsin
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I'm probably gonna slap myself for it but then it'd be something like this then?

Title: Infinite Stratos: Cake eater

Description: Orimura Ichika is a normal teenaged boy. That is if you count being an orphan, having an older sister who is the top pilot of the world's most advanced weapons platform, and having the fugitive scientist who invented them living in their basement counts as normal. More bizarre are the quirky women gathering at his home due to his sister's profession. Can he survive?
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:02   Link #21846
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launch it nao!
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:02   Link #21847
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@ Senpai - Think the fanboys can be tricked into thinking the IS is part of the performance?
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:05   Link #21848
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Some people will, until the Drone started to use it's weapon and... only the most stupid people can be fooled.
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:08   Link #21849
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You're underestimating how stupid some fanboys can be Also, wouldn't it just look like some kind of light show even if it did fire?
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:09   Link #21850
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Okay, maybe until someone is injured for real, and if not that, someone died gorny.
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:09   Link #21851
demino_hellsin
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summary is too long must fix

EDIT: current summary: Orimura Ichika is a normal teenager. That is if you count being orphaned, an older sister who is the top pilot of the world's most advanced weapon, and the fugitive scientist who invented said weapon lives in their basement. And that's not even half of it
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:13   Link #21852
Eratas123
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@ Demi - Shorten the professions. Just say Chifuyu instead of greatest pilot for example.

@ Senpai - That won't be much of a problem since it's mostly trying to kill Irish. The main thing is that, since he took the mission without Tatenashi knowing, he has to make sure he's not seen while doing it. Of course, being the butt monkey he is, this doesn't stick.
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:23   Link #21853
demino_hellsin
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the last part seems to need to be changed to let the audience know that there's more coming

Saying Chifuyu outright doesn't seem... correct? so to speak
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:29   Link #21854
Eratas123
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Take out best pilot and just say older sister. Any fan will know who the eff you're talking about.

@ Senpai - Debating on whether or not I should re-write Shadow. Any thoughts? Sorry for bothering you.
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:31   Link #21855
demino_hellsin
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I surrender >.>

posting...
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:32   Link #21856
Eratas123
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@ Demi - Wait for the readers to flow
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:35   Link #21857
demino_hellsin
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well I'll be here for a few more minutes, let's see what happens O.o
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:37   Link #21858
Eratas123
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Just waiting for Senpai's reply.
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:40   Link #21859
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If you plan to concentrate with it, I advise you should, because your current writing style is much, much better.
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Old 2012-02-12, 08:44   Link #21860
Eratas123
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@ Senpai - I meant on the plot. The more I re-vamped Irish, the more he seems like Ichika's counterpart than Kyuukai's. This turns into a more duality based story. Also some minor changes like Tatenashi's org taking Irish instead of Fracture, which would make him being partnered with her make more sense. Also plan to re-vamp things like Irish turning progressively more anti-heroic during the backstory by letting his jerkass facade become his real personality.
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