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Old 2012-02-27, 09:42   Link #24141
Eratas123
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ISA is explicitly mentioned as a neutral party, so no foreign ploticians allowed. it's the reason they couldn't dissect Ichika after he enrolled. Anything else?
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Old 2012-02-27, 09:46   Link #24142
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Hmm... Given how hell-bent Praxidike is at bringing down the IS System, what else could they attack aside from the Academy?

I'm thinking the Katami Dojo since that's where some of the Second Year students are having their attachment programme. (Athena fanon :3)
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Old 2012-02-27, 09:57   Link #24143
Eratas123
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Uh...they're gonna have to deal with the country's army's first. They may not be allowed to tamper with ISA, but they'll fight tooth and nail to protect it.
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Old 2012-02-27, 10:02   Link #24144
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That too... The naval task force had little trouble dealing with three standard drones.

Guess I could have the drone squad taking on the same task force while Inami then pops by to assist, defying warnings to not use the unit.
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Old 2012-02-27, 10:04   Link #24145
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Can Inami not be in everyhting? Seriously, he shows up even when he has no in-story reason to.
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Old 2012-02-27, 10:14   Link #24146
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Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
Can Inami not be in everyhting? Seriously, he shows up even when he has no in-story reason to.
True, having him pop by a naval task force wouldn't make sense. But then again, something needs to trigger his shift. If it's not going to be drones, it'll be either an enraged Cecilia/Tsurugi.
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Old 2012-02-27, 10:20   Link #24147
Eratas123
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Then do it some other time. You're really pushing the limit when he appears all the time just because that's where the story's at. He's part of the story, he's not THE story.
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Old 2012-02-27, 10:49   Link #24148
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Well, the story is regarding Tsurugi spending her time in the Academy while also being under his guidance/care.

His appearance isn't exactly avoidable as one would hope. But I am trying to find ways to give Tsurugi screen time. One of which is popping in scenes of her in normal class, quietly ranting about maths.

Spoiler for Maths:
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Old 2012-02-27, 10:56   Link #24149
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So she has no life outside of Inami? That would work.....if she was named Generic harem member 2543 Just because people love someone doesn't mean they have to show up literally thinking about them every time they appear. It's especially bad if the POV stays with them and they're still acting like GHM 2543.
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Old 2012-02-27, 11:05   Link #24150
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
So she has no life outside of Inami? That would work.....if she was named Generic harem member 2543 Just because people love someone doesn't mean they have to show up literally thinking about them every time they appear. It's especially bad if the POV stays with them and they're still acting like GHM 2543.
Nope, she does talk about other stuffs. As shown above, and for the part after, she recalls her hatred for mathematics.

Btw, would you say that Laura is being herself in this excerpt?

Spoiler for Short:
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Old 2012-02-27, 11:09   Link #24151
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It's amusing and yes, Laura is a literal genie. :3

As for what Eras said,m it was a pure truth. The biggest problem regarding character development of a love interest (or harem member in this chase) is if their development tied to the hero, but I knew you acknowledge it and can do better.

(currently fighting this plague regarding Sacred Twins)
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Old 2012-02-27, 11:12   Link #24152
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How did she extend her IS that far? The length is nowhere near that big.

@ Senpai - I'm torn! Should I make Ran's kid the same age or 4-5 to add a sense of innocence and energy? I can't make up my mind!
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Old 2012-02-27, 11:14   Link #24153
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How did she extend her IS that far? The length is nowhere near that big.
Most likely she was standing up. I would make it such that she fully deployed her IS but that would be a wee bit too... exaggerating.

Quote:
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As for what Eras said,m it was a pure truth. The biggest problem regarding character development of a love interest (or harem member in this chase) is if their development tied to said love interest, but I knew you acknowledge it and can do better.
I do acknowledge it. Hence why I try to add class scenes in the midst... A school is a school still.
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Old 2012-02-27, 11:17   Link #24154
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She still wouldn't be able to reach. Look at her kissing scene with ichika.
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Old 2012-02-27, 11:30   Link #24155
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She still wouldn't be able to reach. Look at her kissing scene with ichika.
Hmm... What if she were to fire on of her wire daggers by accident?

Either that or I'll mark it under Rule of Funny.
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Old 2012-02-27, 11:33   Link #24156
agetreme
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A little late but.....

backlog buster!!!

I believe that Tabane should appear as little as possible(unless the whole story revolved around her or you are talking about her planning something big again)....

Because it is literally quite impossible for any OC to meet her (If all the top agency(FBI, MI9...etc) around the world can't even locate her, what make you think your OC can find her? The probability of finding her by chance is as high as finding a needle in space....)

Which means people don't find her, she find people.

With this in mind: Why would she appear before insignificant people (read: Almost every single human beings on earth) other than Ichika, Houki and Chifuyu?

Characters can meet her, only when they are around Ichika, Houki or Chifuyu but it also means that it is difficult to stab her with something with them around......

Ichika will save Tabane because he is a hero
Houki will save Tabane because they are sisters
Chifuyu will save Tabane because she is her friend

So to stab her, you need to isolate her.......and

If she appear before the OC alone, it means the OC is important.....enough to get her attention, this will up the Mary Sue factor....

Although Tabane do things for LOL however she will only do things if the said things can provide her long term entrainment.....and she can instigate the fun stuff with only minimum little effort on her part.....
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Old 2012-02-27, 11:35   Link #24157
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@ Treme - She gets stabbed in FI when she appears to try and get the kids back.....then gets stabbed when one of the kids asked if she was Tabane then ganking her when she says yes.
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Old 2012-02-27, 18:25   Link #24158
ZeroXSEED
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@ Eras
Yes you can make her kid younger, there's no reason you can't. Maybe make her kid 5 is enough :3

@ Age
Mary sue factor eh. :|

@ Stratos
Good luck :
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Old 2012-02-27, 19:16   Link #24159
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@ Senpai - So how literate would a 5 year old be?
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Old 2012-02-27, 19:27   Link #24160
ZeroXSEED
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Just starting to learn it, proper local language and very basic math and art.
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