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Old 2011-12-29, 00:51   Link #15221
EthernalRain
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Join Date: Oct 2011
For an IS fight, I'd suggest cinematics, having an epic yet reasonable flow to your writing of said fight scene, and including an elaborate yet understandable flourish to it. Makes it very entertaining to read. Other than that, same rule applies.

Example:

Ichika Orimura was a very unlucky young man. He blamed- well, he couldn't blame anyone for that matter. Not his parents, like many a cliched young man. He could maybe blame that Sarashiki girl, but that wasn't the point right now.

He lifted his red energy blade, as one of his best friends cracked down with a sword to his head.

"Houki! STOP!" He cried.

"Ichika! YOU PERVERT!" She roared, hacking down over and over again. He flicked her away with a sweep of his armored hand, backing off a large distance with bursts of his IS's engines. The arena's soil kicked up with every burst, splashing dirt left and right. Houki matched his speed, quickly gaining distance. She slashed at his legs, causing him to jump up to avoid her blade. She soared underneath him, but quickly kicked down to pivot towards her target.

Ichika landed on the ground, watching the blade glide for his head. He kicked down with all his might, sending dirt flying up. The dirt landed in Houki's face, caught in her hair and piloting suit.

She paused her blade, hacking and spitting out dirt. "Ichika..." She growled.

"Houki! I'm so sorry!"

He paled further and futher before. When he panicked, saying things out of character would be a very acceptable thing to do.

"Oh crap."

And so were the last words Ichika Orimura said, before an armored fist broke through the pathetic remnants of his shield energy, and socked him right between the eyes.

---

Much less of an example, more like a potential omake idea.
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Old 2011-12-29, 00:56   Link #15222
Eratas123
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@ Rain - Thanks IS fights tend to be hard for me since I have to take multiple technical factors into account and not just regular fight factors. This is gonna make the plane fight very hard since it's gonna be switching between Irish fighting in the depressurizing plane and Tatenashi fighting off the mooks in the air outside. Human vs IS fights are going to be even worse due to the imbalance. Irish's fight with Arachne is going to be a nightmare to write

Side note - What made Houki so pissed? Seems like Tatenashi did something
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Old 2011-12-29, 00:57   Link #15223
demino_hellsin
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can't help much with the fight scene since I don't get to write them much.

On another note. Chifuyu's daydreams is way hard @_@... I can't go half-way into the daydream before I end up giggling and trying to prevent a nosebleed.

You guys think a hurricane could affect IS?
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:01   Link #15224
Eratas123
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@ Demi - Can you give me the plot?
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:03   Link #15225
EthernalRain
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@ demino: The rain would end up hitting the pilot, since water doesn't have enough mass or velocity to warrant use of shield energy. Think of all the consequences of having freezing cold water on you, and you have the result of hurricane vs IS.

@ Eratas: It has something to do with a certain canonical, controversial nosebleed...
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:03   Link #15226
demino_hellsin
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Well I got a proper start and concept to two plots. One is serious with a light-hearted end. The other is just fanservice... well... oh god here comes the nosebleed
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:08   Link #15227
Eratas123
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@ Demi - Gimme both

@ Rain - That reminds me: How should I change volume 5 with Irish's presence? She'll probably still be Ichika's bodyguard, but should I tone down her teasing?
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:10   Link #15228
EthernalRain
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Well, her object of teasing has changed to Irish, so you could have her act more civil and like a friendly aquaintance to Ichika instead of what she's like in canon.
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:13   Link #15229
Eratas123
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I don't think she can tease Irish too much since

1. He either ignores it

or

2. Acts somewhat repulsed and never shows signs of arousal like Ichika does.
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:15   Link #15230
demino_hellsin
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would the winds affect the IS at all?
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:15   Link #15231
EthernalRain
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@ Eratas:#1 is reasonable, #2 might give her more incentive to up the ante a bit with her teasing.

@ Demino: The winds wouldn't affect the IS unless the IS runs on a propulsion system that uses engines and aerodynamics rather than PIC and anti gravity flight.
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:20   Link #15232
Eratas123
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@ Demi - Considering they can go hypersonic? Not so much.

@ Rain - Can you think of why she ws attracted to Ichika in canon in the first place? I need a reason for her liking Irish or I'll drop their romance. Don't want to make it seem forced.
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:23   Link #15233
EthernalRain
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@ Eratas: First of all, I think she was attracted to Ichika because of his courage and determination.

For Irish, originally he piques her interest being who he is and what he does, so she takes the initiative to get to know him a bit more. It's up to you whether she decides to like what she's finds or not.
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:26   Link #15234
Eratas123
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@ Rain - Irish also has those traits and shows them more by pretty much going into an IS battle naked. He also shows a nicer side and isn't as much of an ass as he likes people to think. Is Ichika helping the sisters reunite a big factor into her attraction?
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:27   Link #15235
EthernalRain
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@ Eratas: That's a very big factor as well.
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:32   Link #15236
Eratas123
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Then I guess that helps. Both Ichika and Irish work together to have them try to get along better, though their reasons for doing so are different. Ichika does it to be nice and try to help Kanzashi while Irish does it to make sure Tatenashi doesn't get distracted on missions (or so he says).
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:37   Link #15237
EthernalRain
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On a side note, does Ichika do any missions? And if so (or not), does he have a primary partner he takes along instead of the battle harem?

Irish has Tatenashi, Kyuukai has Adam or Akira, but what about Ichika?

On another random note, who does Irish spend the most time with? Ichika has his harem, Kyuukai first tries with Laura but then foots it alone until Koneko and Canan arrive.

And on yet another note, when does Canan arrive?
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:42   Link #15238
Eratas123
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@ Rain - Ichika's a student so no mssions there. Most of his scenarios are just unofficial things he gets dragged into like the Dunoa Corp or the Male IS pilot experimentation.

Not even sure if I'll use Adam, remember? Reaper is similar enough in that regard.

Irish stays with the student council group composed of The Nohotoke's, Tatenashi, and sometimes Kanzashi. Ichika stays with his harem and Kyuukai's is either with Laura or the teachers.

Not sure about Canan. As I said, I'm continuously adjusting the plot to fit with the scenarios.
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:48   Link #15239
EthernalRain
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Akira then, as Kyuukai's mission partner. Well, until Lindy wakes up that is. So, how does the Dunoa Corp event work?

I originally planned to do a plotline where Charlotte gets kidnapped by her own father, and Ichika and the gang rescue her from the Paris manufacturing plant. They had to parachute in.

Kyuukai: So pull the red strap when you reach 500 feet, alright?
Ichika: Wait what-

Kyuukai: Out you go!

Ichika: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH-

Kyuukai: That's a long way down...

Ichika: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH- FWOMP! CRASH!

Kyuukai: Oh, that poor AC box!
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Old 2011-12-29, 01:52   Link #15240
Eratas123
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@ Rain - Ichika's a priority target along with Charlotte. Sorry, but most likely Kyuukai can't do shit against Dunoa here and Ichika will have to save himself. As I said before, everyone has their own stories and no protag butts into the others unless its necessary. Same case, only Ichika and the harem attack the Silver Gospel while the other two stay behind. This avoids the spotlight stealing squad that permeates most OC's.
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