|2008-03-19, 17:29||Link #2103|
Q.How many Haruhi's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A.None! She has Kyon do it!
Q.How many super sayins does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A.One but it takes four episodes to do so.
Q. What kinda of review does the game Dragonball Z:Ultimate Battle 22 get
A. it sucks ballz
Q: Where does Kagome clean her clothes?
Q.What sucks more than Inu Yasha?
Q.What's the difference between Mikuru and a bunny?
Q.What's the difference between Negi Springfield and a toilet?
Q. Whats the difference between Death Note and Death?
Recently Twinkies has gone out of business after realizing Naruto had more filler.
Kyon: Haruhi, is that a gold headband?
Kyon: Oh, I thought your hair was on fire!
You know you watch too much anime when ...
... you understand the plot of Evangelion.
Code Geass Joke:
Lelouch: From this day forward, I shall make a new country separate from Britania! And I shall call it...the United States of Japan!
Q. How do you get Pikachu on a bus?
A. You Poke-em-on
Q. Why should you never let a pokemon go into your bathroom?
A. He may Peek-at-chu
Q. What do you call a low fat pokemon?
A."I Can't Believe its not Butterfree"
Q. How do ninjas raise their children?
A. From the dead.
Q. whats the difference between yuki and a computor?
Q. What was Mikuru's reply when Kyon asked her out?
A. That's classified.
Q. What was Haruhi's reply when Kyon asked her out?
A. The language in her reply was so bad, they had to get a double to dub her voice!
|2008-03-19, 20:26||Link #2105|
Life's better in a harem.
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Oakville, Ontario, Canada
Well, I was kinda bored so I decided to make a gif of one of the scenes in Clannad EP 20 which I found to be quite funny:
Last edited by NoSanninWa; 2008-03-19 at 22:59. Reason: 3.5 MB so I turned it into a link.
|2008-03-19, 22:35||Link #2107|
Join Date: Feb 2007
Last edited by NoSanninWa; 2008-03-19 at 23:06. Reason: 3.5MB picture quoted.
|2008-03-20, 02:14||Link #2109|
Ha ha ha ha ha...
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Right behind you.
|2008-03-21, 12:40||Link #2112|
ok ok I got a good one:
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson goes on a camping trip. After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend.
‘Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”
I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes,” replies Watson.
“And what do you deduce from that?”
Watson ponders for a minute.
“Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.
“Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?”
Holmes is silent for a moment. ‘Watson, you idiot!” he says. “Someone has stolen our tent!”
|2008-03-21, 12:54||Link #2114|
This woman rushed to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off: “Doctor, take a look at me. When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were bloodshot and bugging out, and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What’s WRONG with me, Doctor!?”
The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says: “Well, I can tell you that there ain’t nothing wrong with your eyesight….”
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes
to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in
Spain;they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself
to his birth mother. Up on receiving the picture, she tells her husband
that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds,
"They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal.
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.
"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari.
So this man goes in to see the doctor. The doctor tells him he has good news and bad news. THe man asks for the good news first. the doctor says "the good news is , you are going to die of cancer and you have only one day to live." the man is shocked and says" well then whats the bad news?" "The bad news is i forgot to tell you this yesterday..."
The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't know
anything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?"
"OK, Sweetheart. Putting it simply, we will call your private place 'the
prison' and call my private thing 'the prisoner'. So what we do is: put the
prisoner in the prison.
And then they made love for the first time.
Afterwards, the guy is lying face up on the bed, smiling with satisfaction.
Nudging him, his bride giggles, "Honey the prisoner seems to have escaped."
Turning on his side, he smiles. "Then we will have to re-imprison him."
After the second time they spent, the guy reaches for his cigarettes but
the girl, thoroughly enjoying the new experience of making love, gives him
a suggestive smile, "Honey, the prisoner is out again!"
The man rises to the occasion, but with the unsteady legs of a recently
Afterwards, he lays back on the bed, totally exhausted.
She nudges him and says, "Honey, the prisoner escaped again."
Limply turning his head, He YELLS at her, "Hey, its not a life sentence,
Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to leave because otherwise they were all going to fall. They weren't able to name that person until the woman gave a very touching speech. She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope because, as a woman, she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids, or for men in general, and was used to always making sacrifices with little in return. As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping their hands.
A song to all my exes:
If I had a hammer
I would build a house for two
If I had a sailing ship
I would take a trip with you
If I had the poet's hand
I would write a verse for thee
If I had the painter's touch
On canvas you would be
But I don't have a hammer
And I don't have a ship
So I can't build a house
And we can't take a trip
And I'll never be a poet
Nor have the painter's grace
So I can't write your verse
Nor immortalize your face
And also, I have herpes
Einstein dies and goes to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter tells him, "You look like Einstein, but you have NO idea the lengths that some people will go to sneak into Heaven. Can you prove who you really are?"
Einstein ponders for a few seconds and asks, "Could I have a blackboard and some chalk?"
Saint Peter snaps his fingers and a blackboard and chalk instantly appear. Einstein proceeds to describe with arcane mathematics and symbols his theory of relativity.
Saint Peter is suitably impressed. "You really ARE Einstein!" he says, "Welcome to heaven!"
The next to arrive is Picasso. Once again, Saint Peter asks for credentials.
Picasso asks, "Mind if I use that blackboard and chalk?"
Saint Peter says, "Go ahead."
Picasso erases Einstein's equations and sketches a truly stunning mural with just a few strokes of chalk.
Saint Peter claps. "Surely you are the great artist you claim to be!" he says. "Come on in!"
Then Saint Peter looks up and sees George W. Bush. Saint Peter scratches his head and says, "Einstein and Picasso both managed to prove their identity. How can you prove yours?"
George W. looks bewildered and says, "Who are Einstein and Picasso?"
Saint Peter sighs and says, "Come on in, George."
Last edited by NightWish; 2008-03-21 at 13:39.
|2008-03-21, 13:43||Link #2115|
A fuckin' genius!
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Here, there ... EVERYWHERE!
Mice are lovely and wonderful pets, as long as they don't pervade by themselves.
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are taking a walk across a misty heath. After some time they come across a huge pile of shit.
"This is the place where I first saw the hound of the Baskervilles." Holmes sighs.
Two friends meet after a long time and one of them is very depressed.
"What's wrong? Why so glum?" The other one asks.
"Well, I have roaches in my apartment. And yesterday they declared war on my neighbor's roaches."
"What's so bad about that? They'll eventually kill each other and won't bother you anymore."
The sad guy looks at his friend and replies. "Yes, but today they returned with 200 prisoners."
Say 'N-N-N-N-N-N-NO!' to your constipation!
A wedding ceremony comes out of the church. Everyone's happy and is cheering for the new pair. Across the street two young boys watch the whole process.
Then one of them says to his friend: "Let me show you a joke."
He runs across the street, pushes himself trough the crowd to the groom, hugs him around the waist and says. "Daddy, daddy!"
|2008-03-24, 00:20||Link #2117|
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: New England
Movies re-enacted by bunnies, in 30 seconds!
More here: http://www.angryalien.com/
|2008-03-24, 22:21||Link #2120|
Join Date: Dec 2005
Anime aside, my PS3 games are being ruined. It's my first time having a Playstation and I think Nintendo had the right idea with all the grunts and squeaking. At least include a Japanese audio option! I was playing the Devil May Cry demo and the subtitles were already there, but not Japanese audio! Just lame-voiced moron speaking at the wrong speed, mispronounced japanese names and all... it hurts. Currently being tortured by Hotshots Golf dub.