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Old 2010-04-04, 22:43   Link #4101
RadiantBeam
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Harufox View Post
Well said, Arbitres. Makes me want to cry reading it (I'd give rep, but I have to spread some around before I can rep another one of your posts again).

Which has bought me to finally bring up this rather small (yet big) issue I have. I wanted to avoid it just in case it sounded like I was trying to steal limelight. Therefore, I have wrapped it up in spoiler tags below:

Spoiler for move along, you don't need to read this if you don't want to:
I'd say give it some time, see if the feeling lasts. The problem with liking someone that quickly and wanting to take it further is that it might end up only being a strong crush or infatuation, and fades after several weeks or so. So, I'd say consider it carefully and give some time to thinking about it, get to know him better and talk to him a little longer, before you ultimately decide on anything.
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Old 2010-04-04, 23:07   Link #4102
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
I'd say give it some time, see if the feeling lasts. The problem with liking someone that quickly and wanting to take it further is that it might end up only being a strong crush or infatuation, and fades after several weeks or so. So, I'd say consider it carefully and give some time to thinking about it, get to know him better and talk to him a little longer, before you ultimately decide on anything.
I was thinking about a bit of time. At least a few weeks to a month.
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Old 2010-04-04, 23:34   Link #4103
SaintessHeart
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ascaloth View Post
So wait, she was trying to hook you up with imouto?
Apparently yes. She says "I am the perfect guy for her, though a little gay". *facepalm*

Quote:
Pal, the typical "normal female otaku" in Singapore is a yaoi fangirl who dresses in Japanese thigh-highs kind of fashion which doesn't help to flatter their below-average looks, not to mention their general behaviour isn't exactly....attractive. Trust me, you generally don't want to have too much to deal with them.
That is why I put "normal" in front of the words "female otaku". Yaoi fandom is okay for me...as long as I don't set scenes for them (both the sisters like yaoi actually... quite scary if you think about it. They think that it's cute). Unline Yuri, Yaoi is very wrong and disgusting IRL, but in anime it should be fine.

Regarding zettai ryouiki, most girls here cannot get the perfect proportion of knee to bottom of skirt/top of skirt to top of socks = 1.4 to phi, despite the school system of teaching maths. I think I will just stick to 2D girls.

Quote:
Speculating in futures? That's probably quite an apt analogy, actually.
I was thinking about the R-R factor (Risk-Reward).

At any rate, I am washing my hands out of this. Hopefully I can still act as an older brother to that imouto and a friend to that madwoman.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Harufox View Post
I was thinking about a bit of time. At least a few weeks to a month.
If you take a photo of him and you together, you would probably receive reps from all the female members in this forum.

But seriously, you should think through it before taking your next step.
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When three puppygirls named after pastries are on top of each other, it is called Eclair a'la menthe et Biscotti aux fraises avec beaucoup de Ricotta sur le dessus.
Most of all, you have to be disciplined and you have to save, even if you hate our current financial system. Because if you don't save, then you're guaranteed to end up with nothing.
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Old 2010-04-05, 01:52   Link #4104
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
Apparently yes. She says "I am the perfect guy for her, though a little gay". *facepalm*
I'll admit, the fact you're doing all you can not to hook up with her little sister is making you pass as someone like that. But at least the fact that she's trying to do that means she doesn't think so badly of you either and the threats she sends you aren't meaningful, or she hates her sister that badly as well (though that doesn't seem to be the case). But still, whether the sister is mental or not, you ought to stop thinking she's cute when she's angry

Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
That is why I put "normal" in front of the words "female otaku". Yaoi fandom is okay for me...as long as I don't set scenes for them (both the sisters like yaoi actually... quite scary if you think about it. They think that it's cute). Unline Yuri, Yaoi is very wrong and disgusting IRL, but in anime it should be fine.
I'd like to argue with you on that. Both are types of same sex activities and it's a little hypocritical for people (not neccessarily you) to say that, but I'll save the discussion since it doesn't belong here.

Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
At any rate, I am washing my hands out of this. Hopefully I can still act as an older brother to that imouto and a friend to that madwoman.
So what's your opinion exactly? Do you like her or do you think she's mental and want to prevent getting too close to her? Because if it's both, I'd almost think you're some kind of masochist
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Old 2010-04-05, 04:57   Link #4105
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Quote:
I finally pulled myself together and said I liked him.
Make sure to say in what way, wouldn't want a misunderstanding now....well, I got my share of homo friends, although we don't even need to talk about it - we're good friends, but they know I'm straight, so they do their best to make me feel at ease, as do I.
Quote:
Risk-Reward
Try making a list of those...bet 10 to 1 the risks dominate
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Old 2010-04-05, 05:13   Link #4106
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Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
Unline Yuri, Yaoi is very wrong and disgusting IRL, but in anime it should be fine.
...What?
Please tell me you didn't mean it. That sounds indeed pretty hypocritical, not to mention incredibly offensive.
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Old 2010-04-05, 07:02   Link #4107
SaintessHeart
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yoko Takeo View Post
I'll admit, the fact you're doing all you can not to hook up with her little sister is making you pass as someone like that. But at least the fact that she's trying to do that means she doesn't think so badly of you either and the threats she sends you aren't meaningful, or she hates her sister that badly as well (though that doesn't seem to be the case). But still, whether the sister is mental or not, you ought to stop thinking she's cute when she's angry
Quote:
So what's your opinion exactly? Do you like her or do you think she's mental and want to prevent getting too close to her? Because if it's both, I'd almost think you're some kind of masochist
She is crazy, but I do like her because she knows what is honesty and trust, and has the guts to stand up for her friends.

Though I would prefer if she is less abusive towards me. Otherwise, her good points certainly outweigh her general behaviour towards other people. Plus, her softer side makes her look cute, though only her close friends see that.

Now that you have pointed out about the hating her sister part, I have a new thing to tease her with : by calling her a siscon. Wish me luck that I don't die or be permanently paralysed.

Quote:
I'd like to argue with you on that. Both are types of same sex activities and it's a little hypocritical for people (not neccessarily you) to say that, but I'll save the discussion since it doesn't belong here.
It is a personal opinion so you can feel free to ignore that. Too bad for anyone else who thinks it is hypocritical and offensive and wants to pick a fight.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kafriel View Post
Try making a list of those...bet 10 to 1 the risks dominate
Yes, and I would probably die before I can claim my winnings.
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When three puppygirls named after pastries are on top of each other, it is called Eclair a'la menthe et Biscotti aux fraises avec beaucoup de Ricotta sur le dessus.
Most of all, you have to be disciplined and you have to save, even if you hate our current financial system. Because if you don't save, then you're guaranteed to end up with nothing.
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Old 2010-04-05, 08:05   Link #4108
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
It is a personal opinion so you can feel free to ignore that. Too bad for anyone else who thinks it is hypocritical and offensive and wants to pick a fight.
Pick a fight?
I'm sorry, but if you suddenly make such a statement you have to expect that someone will be taken aback and go into discussion mode. I don't care if you don't want to see two guys making out - that's your right. But saying that it's inherintly wrong and disgusting does ineed not sit well with me.
I'm not trying to pick a fight, I just don't understand how two guys making out can be "wrong" while to girls making out is perfectly acceptable. You don't have to answer, but please don't talk over my head and make it sound like I'm waiting for a chance to jump at you and throw insults.
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Old 2010-04-05, 09:06   Link #4109
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Harufox View Post
I was thinking about a bit of time. At least a few weeks to a month.
Well, I still say think about it pretty carefully and be absolutely sure of yourself before you decide on what to do. The worst thing that can happen is that you end up on shaky ground with a good friend because you didn't look before you leaped.
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Old 2010-04-05, 10:07   Link #4110
SaintessHeart
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Here is something interesting by an actress named Aya Sugimoto....



Spoiler for TL : slightly NSFW, courtesy Sankaku:


Minus a few other parts, the bolded lines are rather true. And I lol-ed at the red bolded line.
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When three puppygirls named after pastries are on top of each other, it is called Eclair a'la menthe et Biscotti aux fraises avec beaucoup de Ricotta sur le dessus.
Most of all, you have to be disciplined and you have to save, even if you hate our current financial system. Because if you don't save, then you're guaranteed to end up with nothing.

Last edited by SaintessHeart; 2010-04-05 at 10:26. Reason: it isn't right to feed the spark with fuel.
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Old 2010-04-05, 14:40   Link #4111
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Didn't expect my happiness and positive energy I had yesterday to die miserably in a fire storm today. Luckily it's unrelated to this infatuation of mine. I didn't really see her today much, but tomorrow chances are I'll be able to spend some time with her.

At least the sakura are in full bloom over here, makes the scenery at least a little prettier.
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Old 2010-04-05, 19:37   Link #4112
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
That is why I put "normal" in front of the words "female otaku". Yaoi fandom is okay for me...as long as I don't set scenes for them (both the sisters like yaoi actually... quite scary if you think about it. They think that it's cute). Unline Yuri, Yaoi is very wrong and disgusting IRL, but in anime it should be fine.
*facepalm* I'm afraid the otaku culture will not exist without one or 2 really diehard nuts that go out of their way to prove their point.


Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintessHeart View Post
If you take a photo of him and you together, you would probably receive reps from all the female members in this forum.

But seriously, you should think through it before taking your next step.
Haha, I look horrible in any photo (I still cannot believe how my facebook profile pic turned out ), but I bet it'll probably work.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kafriel View Post
Make sure to say in what way, wouldn't want a misunderstanding now....well, I got my share of homo friends, although we don't even need to talk about it - we're good friends, but they know I'm straight, so they do their best to make me feel at ease, as do I.)
As in the "I think you're cute and I would definitely go out with you" like . It's not that he didn't know I was straight to begin with (I did tell him so), but I just (I'm not joking) woke up one morning and said "I'm not living this new life if I didn't try it once".

Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
Well, I still say think about it pretty carefully and be absolutely sure of yourself before you decide on what to do. The worst thing that can happen is that you end up on shaky ground with a good friend because you didn't look before you leaped.
I'm going to try carefully-ish (I have a knack for saying "Bugger all" and completely forgetting treading lightly, and it's gotten me into really hairy situations like fights). I have told him I am a bit nervous (Now I know how girls feel on their first date ). The friend thing does worry me too, as you do become good friends when you go out with someone (hence why it may be called a "Boyfriend"), however, I have maintained reasonable relationships with both of my ex-girlfriends. I still talk to them about random things.

Quote:
Originally Posted by yoropa View Post
Didn't expect my happiness and positive energy I had yesterday to die miserably in a fire storm today. Luckily it's unrelated to this infatuation of mine. I didn't really see her today much, but tomorrow chances are I'll be able to spend some time with her.

At least the sakura are in full bloom over here, makes the scenery at least a little prettier.
Wow, sounds like you just had a really bad day . Mind me knowing what happened?
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Old 2010-04-05, 21:31   Link #4113
yoropa
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It's off topic, so I'll just leave it at "I need to graduate before social life kills me"
To get back on topic, I picked up a Korean learning CD from the library today. Maybe it will help me with this girl? Who knows.

I do know the girl herself actually did begin to learn my own native language as well. Would you consider that to be significant in any way, or no?
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Old 2010-04-05, 21:52   Link #4114
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Originally Posted by yoropa View Post
It's off topic, so I'll just leave it at "I need to graduate before social life kills me"
To get back on topic, I picked up a Korean learning CD from the library today. Maybe it will help me with this girl? Who knows.

I do know the girl herself actually did begin to learn my own native language as well. Would you consider that to be significant in any way, or no?
That depends on the circumstances in which you learnt this. But from this and from the time she asks to call you "oppa" (which is a term Korean girls often call their lovers, if you didn't know), things are looking good.
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Old 2010-04-05, 23:25   Link #4115
SaintessHeart
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yoropa View Post
It's off topic, so I'll just leave it at "I need to graduate before social life kills me"
To get back on topic, I picked up a Korean learning CD from the library today. Maybe it will help me with this girl? Who knows.

I do know the girl herself actually did begin to learn my own native language as well. Would you consider that to be significant in any way, or no?
If both of you can speak English, use it as the medium of comms. I don't recommend communicating with her in Korean because it might make a fool out of yourself.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ascaloth View Post
That depends on the circumstances in which you learnt this. But from this and from the time she asks to call you "oppa" (which is a term Korean girls often call their lovers, if you didn't know), things are looking good.
Add an "i" behind and.... *IS SHOT*
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When three puppygirls named after pastries are on top of each other, it is called Eclair a'la menthe et Biscotti aux fraises avec beaucoup de Ricotta sur le dessus.
Most of all, you have to be disciplined and you have to save, even if you hate our current financial system. Because if you don't save, then you're guaranteed to end up with nothing.
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Old 2010-04-06, 04:30   Link #4116
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Ok, so kinda long and wierd problem I have. I won't go into detail at the moment about everything, but basicly somthing happened when me and my ex girlfriend went out of town last week to visit her best friend.
Now me and my ex gf have been sorta on and off for about a year, we really don't fight or argue, just stuff keeps coming up or happening. We have been very close lately, kissing, sleeping together whenever we can(not sex just actual sleeping) and just basicly hanging out daily. Now on our vacation everything was going pretty good till the night before we had to leave back when her, her best friend and her boyfriend got drunk at her house, I didn't drink.

Anyways earlier that day, my ex gf told me to use her phone to text her friend where to meet while she was using the bathroom, while opening her inbox up, I noticed a text from her ex bf before me, I stupidly opened it up and saw that the night before she had texted him she loved him and missed him and that she wished she was with him right now...Now I didn't say anything to her I just texted her friend and went on like normal. I guess my next mistake was being hurt and having to talk to somone about it, so I text my only guy friend I can trust, I basicly tell him that I saw the text, and that I know its normal for you to still love your ex's etc but it still hurt to see that. We sent a few texts back to each other and that was it. Fast forward back to that night. My ex and her friend had ALOT to drink, they were giggly, couldn't walk straight, saying stupid things, etc not throwing up luckily enough but still very tipsy.
While we are playing a board game somehow my ex says somthing to the effect that she likes to tease me, so I kinda distance myself and dont talk much, just to prove I guess that her teasing won't work on me.
They both are having way too much to drink, so while they are busy with the game I hide the alcohol. After a bit they notice it missing and try to look for it, begging me to tell them where it is, I don't and they keep looking. They eventually find it, but luckily don't drink anymore...now for some reason while her friend and her boyfriend are getting ready for bed, my ex comes up and randomly hugs me, thinking its just the alcohol i don't do anything, but then she whispers I love you, to me, I tell her no she doesn't, she then says "Just because you act like a douchebag sometimes doesn't mean I can't love you, just because I get mad at you doesn't mean I can't love you right?" I just say right and hug her back, she then gets ready for bed too....Now...here is where the problems starts.
She's in her bed when she just gets up and comes over to me and tries to grab my phone, I ask her why and she says she saw me text stuff about her and she wants to know what, I tell her shes drunk and to go get some sleep, so she lays down. I tell her i'm gonna take a shower...Now at this point i'm trying to think how she could know I texted my friend, I figured she must have glanced over or somthing and saw a bit of it or somthing cause theres no other way she could have known.
Now the lock on the bathroom door is apparently not so good, cause while I'm changing the door handle wiggles and it unlocks and she comes in, she wants to see my phone again, so I show her a few texts thinking that'll be good. Then she kinda flips out I guess, saying how I ruined her trip, and that I need to be more of a man, and that she hates me and storms off outside. Not wanting her to do anything stupid while shes drunk at like 3am in the morning I follow her. She tells me she is going to sleep in her car and to leave her alone...though it wasn't as nice as that...and so I eventually go back inside and shower, I hear the door open and close, so I get out of the shower and find her laying back in bed. I decide to sleep on the ocuch instead of with her. That morning I wake up to the sound of her getting up,etc but I don't 'wake up' a little bit later she ends up putting a blanket over me, before leaving with her friend to go shopping while I'm still 'asleep'.

The rest of that day went normal and the ride back home was ok. But now that we are back home, we havent really talked to each other much, I hafta see her tomorrow but i'm not really sure what to do...
I guess I'm hoping she was just saying some/most of that cause of the alcohol and that we could still be friends if not more. But a part of me wonders if its even worth trying, and I guess I'm also afraid that if I do confront her it'll make it worse since if she Did see somthing I'll have to explain it and I don't want her to think I like stalk what she does cause that isn't the case...I know I shouldn't have looked but I was curious. But even if she didn't see anything and she was just being paranoid cause she thought I was saying somthing, why did she go from 'i love you' to 'i hate you'? bleh I just don't know if its the alcohol or want...guess I just wanted to rant...sorry if this went on too long, you all can ignore it if you like On a side note: her ex before me lives in several states away and is engaged, so too be honest, I really really doubt anything can even happen between them now.
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Old 2010-04-06, 07:33   Link #4117
cheyannew
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Originally Posted by UltimaWolf View Post
she then says "Just because you act like a douchebag sometimes doesn't mean I can't love you, just because I get mad at you doesn't mean I can't love you right?"
I'm sorry, I missed the memo where loving someone involves talking to them in this manner.....

All in all, sounds like you're far better off without her. Alcohol oft brings out certain behaviours because it lowers people's barriers, so to speak. Putting that and her txting her ex together, I wouldn't bother interacting with her at all. You returned from your trip, and you're done, you don't have to deal with the verbal abuse, explosions of immaturity/temper, or any of that other crap anymore.

Whether anythign would happen between her & her ex is rather irrelevant. That she wishes she were with HIM, and not YOU, however, is relevant.

My overly harsh advice? Here's some soap. Wash your hands of that waste of time, and find someone who's more mentally stable.
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Old 2010-04-06, 08:20   Link #4118
Tsuyoshi
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I generally agree with Chey. To me she seems like she's split between you and another guy she probably even knows she has no chances with. To say that sort of thing and then throw a tantrum just isn't right. If she really loved you, she wouldn't have sent a text to her ex iibh. The she said she loves you under influence though might mean she's telling the truth. It does lower people's barriers and most people I've known tend to reveal things about themselves they'd rather want to keep hidden. What I'm also wondering is why she'd ask you of all people to sned a text to her friend. Why couldn't she do it herself? It's not like texting someone can take so long. I may be reading too much into this, but maybe she wanted you to read that particular text and that it was actually meant for you and not her ex? But that's pretty farfetched....
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Old 2010-04-06, 09:31   Link #4119
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Just going to agree with Chey, really. Loving someone doesn't give you the right to verbally abuse them, or to treat them cruelly. Though considering she was under the influence, I wonder just how genuine some of her words are; I've heard that getting drunk can lower a person's natural defenses and make them say things they don't usually say, but that's hardly anything to go by. In any case, don't worry about it too much. It's over with, and if she wants to act like nothing happened, then you can too.
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Old 2010-04-06, 11:41   Link #4120
Kafriel
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Having info on your age would help a lot, either way I suspect it's just a storm in a teacup: she drinks too much for your taste, and hangs out with people you don't want her to be around. Just tell her up front that if she wants to love you, she'll have to get rid of those two.
If it were me....
Quote:
"Just because you act like a douchebag sometimes doesn't mean I can't love you, just because I get mad at you doesn't mean I can't love you right?"
You don't have the right to love me anymore, if you want it so much you'll have to earn it back -shuts door-.
Everyone is selfish to some extent, accepting others is very important. If she can't even begin to understand your feelings, you'll be talking to a wall.
Quote:
I've heard that getting drunk can lower a person's natural defenses and make them say things they don't usually say, but that's hardly anything to go by.
I know that getting drunk gives you a hell of a headache and a very insecure mood. Add the sleepy effect and you got someone who's in no position to talk.
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