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Old 2010-08-08, 19:09   Link #6081
Ricky Controversy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by synaesthetic View Post
What works is going to differ from person to person. Different people are different. What works for my girlfriend and me may not work at all for Beamers and her boy--in fact, it almost certainly won't since our relationships (and ourselves) are fundamentally different in pretty much every way.
Beamers, huh? I may have to make use of that. *Evil grin*

Concerning the rebound issue, there's no real hard time limit defining when it is or is not a rebound. As others have said, you have to feel it out for yourself. If you're dating someone to cover up hurt or make up for some perceived deficit, than you shouldn't pursue it.
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Old 2010-08-08, 19:12   Link #6082
RadiantBeam
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lio View Post
You'll understand one day, even if that means years from now.
Looking at you is like looking at my former self, that's why I can understand you perfectly. It's quite a humbling experience...
Um, just to point out, Mystique is older than you, Lio.

Quote:
Is that person trying to fill a hole in their heart with something that feels similar to what they lost?

Or, is that person ready to start a new chapter in their life?
I think it's rather hard to tell what a person's intentions are with the relationship until after it's been established for awhile. Yes, at a certain point, red flags are going to go up if the person is showing signs of not letting go of their past, but there's no way of knowing that when you first start dating that person.

Unless they're rather abundantly clear about it, in which case I don't understand why you would date them in the first place.

EDIT:
Quote:
Beamers, huh? I may have to make use of that. *Evil grin*
Not in front of the other posters, honey. You promised that would only happen when we were alone.
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Old 2010-08-08, 19:20   Link #6083
Lio
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Originally Posted by synaesthetic View Post
rofl dude, you're twenty-three. I'm pretty sure Mystique has more than a few years on you in terms of life experience. At least what comes out of her mouth I can understand.

What I don't understand is what comes out of your mouth. Your understanding of love and relationships appears to be entirely constructed from the plot and tropes of bad shoujo manga.
I don't expect you to understand everything I say.

There are always people who will benefit from what I give, and there will always be doubters and debaters. Then sometimes, there are people who are just curious enough to ask genuine questions.

I don't try to convince anyone to believe anything they don't want to believe, because there are always more people who will benefit than people who doubt.

As for the thing with Mystique... age does matter to a certain extent. What matters more are the experiences themselves. I can tell you that I was once like her. Almost exactly like her, that I've now grown out of. I've met many people like her, as well as many people like myself who grew out of that phase at all kinds of different age ranges. She can enjoy what she has right now and feel good about it, like I did, but I'm more than certain that she'll grow through that phase someday. For her though... it could be quite a few years away, though there's nothing wrong with it. Neither of us are higher than the other.


Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
I think it's rather hard to tell what a person's intentions are with the relationship until after it's been established for awhile. Yes, at a certain point, red flags are going to go up if the person is showing signs of not letting go of their past, but there's no way of knowing that when you first start dating that person.

Unless they're rather abundantly clear about it, in which case I don't understand why you would date them in the first place..
I was speaking from the other party's perspective.
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Old 2010-08-08, 19:25   Link #6084
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lio View Post
I was speaking from the other party's perspective.
Ah, oops, my mistake. Somehow when I read it I thought you were speaking from the perspective of the person getting involved. My bad.
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Old 2010-08-08, 19:30   Link #6085
synaesthetic
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lio View Post
As for the thing with Mystique... age does matter to a certain extent. What matters more are the experiences themselves. I can tell you that I was once like her. Almost exactly like her, I was boorish and uncouth, a veritable font of assholery. BUT I HAVE SEEN THE LIGHT AND EVOLVED INTO A GREATER BEING, A BEING OF PURE ENERGY THAT YOU MERE MORTALS CANNOT BEGIN TO COMPREHENDDDDDDDD^6^6^6^6^6
Fixed that for you.

Sorry, but subtly insulting Mystique isn't going to win you any brownie points here. She's well-liked by a lot of posters precisely because she calls people out on their bullshit when they're being dickbags.

Look, I really don't care that much and I'd really love it if this thread could get re-railed so we can talk about dating and relationships again. But when you go around passive-aggressively badmouthing another user, to the point of creating an entire thread as a Take That directed at her, it really hurts discussion.

I don't need to defend her; she can amply do that herself. What I am going to say though is that your posts in this thread really don't make a lot of sense. To anyone.

Can we please get this thread re-railed?
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Old 2010-08-08, 19:46   Link #6086
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^ Well, you derailed our efforts to bring it back on track, if you haven't noticed.
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Old 2010-08-09, 00:22   Link #6087
synaesthetic
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I don't really buy any of that zodiac stuff myself (it just seems like something silly, just for fun). I mean, I'm a Taurus, but I act more like a Libra.

I wouldn't really rely on zodiac sign compatibility to determine whether someone was "right" or "wrong" for me.

I'd rather get to know them and base any determination of compatibility off of that information. Some folks might fit into the personality type given by a specific zodiac sign, but I feel safe in saying that's probably the exception rather than the rule.
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Old 2010-08-09, 02:03   Link #6088
zebra
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I barely know that much about zodiacs (Fruits Basket added that word to my vocabulary! XD) ... but I'm well categorized as a Taurus. It fits almost too well.
But I don't see it as something I need to tick off my checklist of compatibility, but just as something fun. Believe in it when it seems good, disregard it when it tells you your relationship is doomed.

I did get a check up for any combination I've been in because my mother knows a lot about zodiacs - and it hasn't been that off in the past, but as I said, it's just for fun for me
But I seriously should have known TaurusxTaurus doesn't work for a long time - when both have the typical Taurus character.

I could get all scientific and try to sedate it with saying the generalizations can always apply bla bla and natures are influenced by the weather and temperature during the first months bla bla, but I don't really care enough What use is it anyway, astrology isn't known for it's logic.


As for use as a pick up line ... depens on how smooth you are and how receivable the other end is.
If you ask for the zodiac sign you have to know something about the compatibility or be well spoken enough to think off something smart on the spot (and be lucky enough s/he doesn't know anything about it). It can work I guess and can come off as extremely charming, but it's also easy to get laughed at.
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Old 2010-08-09, 03:35   Link #6089
0utf0xZer0
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GN0010 Nosferatu View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by sergho View Post
Soul mate. This phrase is impossible. How can you be someone's soul mate when the genders are so different?

She could care less about power tools for example.

She doesn't find The Three Stooges funny at all.

She makes a fuss over babies even if they're a stranger's baby.

She can grieve like crazy when a loved one dies and she gets amazing happy when I remember to buy her a present.

She'll stress for days over what color to paint a room. What's wrong with white? if you have to paint over something, it's always easy to find white paint.

All scratches and scrapes must be properly treated. She makes me go to the doctor and her and the doctor talk about me like I'm not in the room.

It's like living with an alien.
Makes ya wonder...doesn't it?
No offense guys, but I see this "girls are from another planet" thing a lot among geeks circles, and I can't help but think that kind of thinking is why a lot of geeks don't have girlfriends. It often feels like they expect girls to bend to their expectations but not the other way around.

FYI, I doubt my girlfriend is going to bend to my idea of an ideal cosplay "session" anytime soon, and I'm certainly not bowing to hers. Seeing as it, you know, involves me crossdressing as Hitagi Senjougahara so I can join her and her friend's Bakemonogatari cosplay group.

Your partner is not going to agree with you about everything. Heck, my girlfriend and I don't even agree on cosplay stuff and that's what brought us together in the first place.
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Old 2010-08-09, 04:37   Link #6090
GN0010 Nosferatu
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I was just making a joke, that's all.
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Old 2010-08-09, 04:43   Link #6091
Ascaloth
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 0utf0xZer0 View Post
FYI, I doubt my girlfriend is going to bend to my idea of an ideal cosplay "session" anytime soon, and I'm certainly not bowing to hers. Seeing as it, you know, involves me crossdressing as Hitagi Senjougahara so I can join her and her friend's Bakemonogatari cosplay group.
....I actually want to see this.

How about this, tell her it's a deal if she cosplays as Araragi at the same time. Perks of this are, you can mock-abuse her the whole day, and get away with it.
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Old 2010-08-09, 06:08   Link #6092
RadiantBeam
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Arbitres View Post
What I mean is... Is believing in compability via zodiac/signs good or no for a relationship?
Simple answer: No, no it isn't good.

Much longer answer: Very simply, at best a Zodiac sign can give you some kind of basic idea for a person's personality, nothing else. It says nothing about who that person is, or what they've done, or what they like. Believing in compatability via zodiac signs isn't enough to make a relationship.

Non-dating example being used, but I'm going to throw it out anyway. I'm a Taurus. I forget which sign she is, but my best friend is a Zodiac who is my complete and total opposite. Going by Zodiac signs, we should be at each other's throats constantly, but instead we're best friends and she's one of the few people I get along with on a regular 24/7 basis.

So yeah, basically, long post short, the Zodiac doesn't make the relationship. Don't use it to figure out how compatible you are with someone else.
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Old 2010-08-09, 07:41   Link #6093
Kakashi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Arbitres View Post

I don't understand. And do you all think alignment of zodiacs and compability is important/existent? Yes, it's an opinionated question, but feel free to enact a feral wolf pack and tear at it's other throats because of that

What I mean is... Is believing in compability via zodiac/signs good or no for a relationship?
To quote The Big Bang Theory episode 1:

Quote:
Leonard: So, tell us about you.
Penny: Um, me? Ok. I'm a Sagittarius, which probably tells you way more than you need to knoow..
Sheldon: Yees, it tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion that suns apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined positions at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality.
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Old 2010-08-09, 08:58   Link #6094
RadiantBeam
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Originally Posted by Arbitres View Post
Oh well.... Who is compatible with Aquarius? Just to be humored. I for some reason, very much doubt an Aquarius gets along well with an Aries or Libra x_x
Well, honestly I'd have to check with my best friend because she's really big on Zodiac signs (seriously, she knows more about it than I do! ) but a quick Google search turned up the following compatible matches with an Aquarius.

Spoiler for Long quote is long!:
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Old 2010-08-09, 11:52   Link #6095
Kaijo
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Zodiac signs are like any other myth that someone randomly decides to believe in. They have no direct correlation to who you are, nor can they make any predictions. They are kinda like a placebo effect at most, for those who honestly choose to believe them. Like you can give a sugar pill to someone suffering from a headache, tell them it's a super-powerful headache remover, and they get better.

In short, you're better off just making what you will of friendships and relationships. Unless you want to believe the random organization of stars in the sky can make a horsehead when imaginary lines are drawn between them, and that somehow affects you, heh.
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Old 2010-08-09, 12:18   Link #6096
Kafriel
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The zodiac circle holds real power over the ones that believe in it; through its theory, people gain predisposition towards certain signs, thus speeding up relationships (or impeding them, on the other side).
Quote:
Leonard: So, tell us about you.
Penny: Um, me? Ok. I'm a Sagittarius, which probably tells you way more than you need to knoow..
Sheldon: Yees, it tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion that suns apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined positions at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality.
Well that was awesome
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Old 2010-08-09, 12:51   Link #6097
Phillip Lober
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Yes, I used to like a girl who spoke Japanese, and we're best friends. I got over it.
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I am a VERY big believer in linguistics.

Whenever I go to a store that sells Japanese movies, they always bring me to the English crap. That isn't what I want, guys.

Just because I'm a ginger American it doesn't mean I want English movies.
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Old 2010-08-09, 13:09   Link #6098
0utf0xZer0
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Originally Posted by Ascaloth View Post
....I actually want to see this.

How about this, tell her it's a deal if she cosplays as Araragi at the same time. Perks of this are, you can mock-abuse her the whole day, and get away with it.
You know... all of my anime buddies say I should do it too, and one of them even suggested that she should crossdress as well (which won't happen but since she's going as Kanbaru). However, there's two issues: first, my last paper before graduation is due a mere three days before the start of the con, so making a costume and acquiring other necessary items (wig, thighighs that would actually fit me, etc) would be tricky. Second, I know if I do it, pictures of it are going to end up all over the internet.
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Old 2010-08-09, 14:08   Link #6099
Ascaloth
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 0utf0xZer0 View Post
You know... all of my anime buddies say I should do it too, and one of them even suggested that she should crossdress as well (which won't happen but since she's going as Kanbaru). However, there's two issues: first, my last paper before graduation is due a mere three days before the start of the con, so making a costume and acquiring other necessary items (wig, thighighs that would actually fit me, etc) would be tricky. Second, I know if I do it, pictures of it are going to end up all over the internet.
1. If your girl wants it so much, let her do most of the grunt work.

2. Well, true about the Internet part....but Kanbaru? That's way better. I'm sure you two will make the perfect "yuri" couple at the con.
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Old 2010-08-09, 14:18   Link #6100
Ricky Controversy
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Originally Posted by Ascaloth View Post
2. Well, true about the Internet part....but Kanbaru? That's way better. I'm sure you two will make the perfect "yuri" couple at the con.
Pfft, Kanbaru is Araragi's love-slave, as we all know. Reassert your dominance, 0ut, and have your love-slave live up to her title!
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